Obama Slammed Over Pardon of ‘Remorseless’ Turkey
Harry Hope
http://thedesperateblogger.com/
November 25th, 2009
Obama Slammed Over Pardon of �Remorseless� Turkey
By DB
Conservative media and politicians harshly criticized President Obama
today for pardoning Courage, a 45 lb turkey who they claim has
expressed no remorse for his crimes.
The uproar began after Courage appeared for the taping of an exclusive
interview with Fox News� increasingly irrelevant host Sean Hannity.
Hannity, believed to be the only major media figure claiming to be a
fluent speaker of American Fowl, was continually frustrated by what he
described as �the succulent gobbler�s refusal to answer� even the most
basic questions.
�He just mocked me by making birdlike noises,� Hannity said, �I
wouldn�t trust this turkey as far as I could throw him and all the
trimmings.�
In what conservative talk-radio pundit and neo-Nazi icon Rush Limbaugh
described �one of the most nauseatingly whiny-liberal moments I have
ever witnessed,� the President, flanked by his two daughters, pardoned
the North Carolina fugitive during a traditional pre-holiday White
House ceremony.
�I predict that this will be remembered as Obama�s Willie Horton
moment,� the porcine pill-popper continued, �and if it�s true that
he�s being sent to Disneyland, then all I can say is that Mickey
would be well advised to lock Minnie up in Cinderella�s Castle until
this criminal has either moved on or become re-incarcerated.�
Former Vice President Dick Cheney warned children at a petting zoo
that, �The President acting as an apologist for one of our most sacred
national holidays sends a message of weakness that will only embolden
our enemies and threatens the safety and security of every American.�
House Minority Leader John Boehner, who reportedly cut short a holiday
tanning session in a last-ditch attempt to delay the pardon,
criticized the President for what he sees as acting in haste.
�Just like the stimulus, just like the budget, just like healthcare,
this is another example of the President harming the country by not
allowing sufficient deliberation. I expressed to the White House my
willingness � in fact, my desire � to delay debate on health care
reform and a possible jobs bill so that Congress could spend the rest
of the year conducting hearings on this turkey issue. Let the
President bear full responsibility for any consequences for his
premature decision regarding this beast.�
TV and radio �teabag partier� Glenn Beck described the ceremony as a
�shallow, transparent political ploy,� claiming that, �Obama
specifically singled out a pure white Southern turkey for pardon in a
vain attempt to conceal his deep-seeded hatred of white people.�
In a related story, former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin denied reports
that she planned to �go rogue� in her protest of Courage�s pardon,
insisting that she had finalized plans weeks ago for a Black Friday
helicopter tour of Disneyland�.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL!
____________________________________________________
Harry