Testing My Urine
MillerTheRuff
I am interested in checking my own urine for simple things:
Calcium, magnesium, potassium levels, blood presence.
What simple (gotta be very simple for me to do it) tests can I do to check
these? The sort of "tests" I am looking for would be something like...
Put in one drop of some readily available chemical. Look for it to turn blue.
faro...@hotmail.com
Calcium, magnesium and potassium require instruments costing in
hundreds or thousands of $$$ (presumably there are no dipsticks for
these elements). The tests for urine blood require not-so-easily
available reagents. Why not send it to a lab and pay them few dollars
to do it for you?
maverick88
*-----------------------*
Posted at:
www.GroupSrv.com
*-----------------------*
jacques jedwab
miller...@wmconnect.com (MillerTheRuff) wrote:
Several simple (?) tests described in:
A.H. Free and H.M. Free: Urinalysis in clinical laboratory practice. CRC
Press, 1975, 284 pp.
Merck and Oxford Laoratories, Foster City, CA used to sell urinary
calculi field tests. (I am not sure they still sell these kits).
You can also filtrate urine over a Millipore membrane and examine for
microcrystals under transmitted light microscope. If you observe
coffin-shaped crystals (believe it or not), you have Ca oxalate.
J.J.
Paddy
:shock:? ... You've led a sheltered life, indeed.
Taste is really only appropriate for glucose testing, and there has to
be rather a lot of it in the urine. Another 'alternative' glucose
test is to observe how attractive the urine is to flies.
Mark Tarka
Have a lab do it. Make sure
it's one of those alleged idiot-
proof broad spectrum tests that
along with _your_particular_
_profile_for_that_specific_day_,
the report generated also includes
the alleged "normal" range of values
for each parameter.
It'll probably be pricy. Let us know?
As far a instrumentation goes, you can build
a home-made electrospray ionization mass-
spectrometer, but the electronics, vacuum
system, and detector plus the computer
and software will kill you. It will show
Na+, K+, some of the lower M.W. amino acids
and IIRC an alcohol metabolite; none of these
reproducably and/or reliability, AFAIK as of
say, six years ago. I don't recall observing
Ca++, but could have missed it since I wasn't
real deep into the project. Linus Pauling
developed a method for urine analysis. You
might look for that. Electrospray in use use special
clean-up procedures to isolate a target
analyte, e.g. drug metabolite.
Don't I recall GC/MS is used to test horse
and athlete urine for "performance
enhancers?
Mark (Fresh urine is actually drinkable.
No dear, that is not a bottle of lemon Coke;
put the bottle back into the trash can :-)
hanson
news:6b70c71c.04112...@posting.google.com...
> miller...@wmconnect.com (MillerTheRuff) wrote in message
news:<20041121083912...@mb-m22.wmconnect.com>...
> > I took tons of math and chemistry in school. Remember very little now.
> > I am interested in checking my own urine for simple things:
> > Calcium, magnesium, potassium levels, blood presence.
> >
>
> Have a lab do it. It'll probably be pricy. Let us know?
> AFAIK as of say, six years ago. I don't recall observing
> Ca++, but could have missed it since I wasn't
> e.g. drug metabolite... GC/MS is used to test horse
> and athlete urine for "performance enhancers...
> Mark (Fresh urine is actually drinkable.
> No dear, that is not a bottle of lemon Coke;
> put the bottle back into the trash can :-)
>
So, you do smile when you remember drinking fresh urine.
You have august company, dude. Outright respectable really!
== In India they have under alternative medicine a school
that teaches when and for what malady to drink urine.
== In all armies they teach in survival courses to clean your
wound by pissing into to.
== With Siberia's Natives the urine of the shaman was a revered
and highly priced commodity. He ate psilocybin mushrooms and
the metabolites in this urine were some 20 times more
hallucinogenic then the orginal in the shrooms.....
== The use urine in golden showers is standard practice amongst
the aficionados of the wild mating rituals.
== Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
===== Urine is a very versatile liquid =====
ahahahaha.....ahahahanson
Hey, Haarmann, do you have more applications re in your lib?
Let us hear from the darker side about humanity's urine.
Steve Turner
>== Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
Right you are. I actually tried doing this when I was a stupid kid.
I only succeeded in stinking up the garage pretty bad.
Steve Turner
hanson
news:05u6q0hmm8r74c3af...@4ax.com...
That was the Chemist in you!. You are a natural!
Congrats, dude!
ahahaha.....ahahahanson
Mark Tarka
> "Mark Tarka" <mark_...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:6b70c71c.04112...@posting.google.com...
> > miller...@wmconnect.com (MillerTheRuff) wrote in message
> news:<20041121083912...@mb-m22.wmconnect.com>...
> > > I took tons of math and chemistry in school. Remember very little now.
> > > I am interested in checking my own urine for simple things:
> > > Calcium, magnesium, potassium levels, blood presence.
> > >
> >
> [Mark]
> > Have a lab do it. It'll probably be pricy. Let us know?
> > AFAIK as of say, six years ago. I don't recall observing
> > Ca++, but could have missed it since I wasn't
> > real deep into the project. You might look for that.
> > e.g. drug metabolite... GC/MS is used to test horse
> > and athlete urine for "performance enhancers...
> > Mark (Fresh urine is actually drinkable.
> > No dear, that is not a bottle of lemon Coke;
> > put the bottle back into the trash can :-)
> >
> [hanson]
> So, you do smile when you remember drinking fresh urine.
> You have august company, dude. Outright respectable really!
Uh, no. Never drank my own or others; spat
it out :-)
> == In India they have under alternative medicine a school
> that teaches when and for what malady to drink urine.
> == In all armies they teach in survival courses to clean your
> wound by pissing into to.
It is sterile at first; the salts could
be the clensing agent?
> == With Siberia's Natives the urine of the shaman was a revered
> and highly priced commodity. He ate psilocybin mushrooms and
> the metabolites in this urine were some 20 times more
> hallucinogenic then the orginal in the shrooms.....
Heard something similar with the Russians, ...
peasants catching the urine of those pissing
out the windows at the party place.
> == The use urine in golden showers is standard practice amongst
> the aficionados of the wild mating rituals.
Is this NYC you're referring to?
> == Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
> ===== Urine is a very versatile liquid =====
> ahahahaha.....ahahahanson
>
> Hey, Haarmann, do you have more applications re in your lib?
> Let us hear from the darker side about humanity's urine.
Mark (Urine, urout, urallabout, and they 'ate you!)
(The "'" above signifies the missing "h", sir.)
John Savage
>== In India they have under alternative medicine a school
>that teaches when and for what malady to drink urine.
>== In all armies they teach in survival courses to clean your
>wound by pissing into to.
>== With Siberia's Natives the urine of the shaman was a revered
>and highly priced commodity. He ate psilocybin mushrooms and
>the metabolites in this urine were some 20 times more
>hallucinogenic then the orginal in the shrooms.....
>== The use urine in golden showers is standard practice amongst
>the aficionados of the wild mating rituals.
>== Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
>===== Urine is a very versatile liquid =====
I think urine is a component of a soak used to treat timber that's
destined for the resonator part of the very best Italian violins.
And the ladies of southern Italy used to soak their hair in horses
urine to achieve a bleached blonde look.
--
John Savage (news address invalid; keep news replies in newsgroup)
John Savage
>Taste is really only appropriate for glucose testing, and there has to
>be rather a lot of it in the urine. Another 'alternative' glucose
>test is to observe how attractive the urine is to flies.
In my uni days I lodged at the home of an elderly widow. She would
from time to time inadvertently leave a few yellow droplets on the
toilet seat. I noted that each tiny pool of liquid provided a focal
point of interest for a handful of small ants. They obviously found
something in the liquid attractive to their taste; I assumed it to
be glucose from undiagnosed diabetes.
Gregory L. Hansen
The swordsmiths of old had all kinds of mystical ideas about their craft,
and they tried all kinds of things. But quenching in urine really did
help. Crystals forming on the blade improved heat transfer, and some
nitrogen seeped into the edge.
--
"Let us learn to dream, gentlemen, then perhaps we shall find the
truth... But let us beware of publishing our dreams before they have been
put to the proof by the waking understanding." -- Friedrich August Kekulé
Steve Turner
Well, I would have preferred to actually obtain some white P. Now
THAT would have been cool. Utterly impossible given the primitive
nature of my attempt...
Steve Turner
faro...@hotmail.com
> On Tue, 23 Nov 2004 18:20:03 GMT, "hanson" <han...@quick.net> wrote:
>
> >"Steve Turner" <sp...@spam.net> wrote in message
> >news:05u6q0hmm8r74c3af...@4ax.com...
> >> On Mon, 22 Nov 2004 22:09:39 GMT, "hanson" <han...@quick.net>
wrote:
> >>
> >> >== Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
> >>
> Well, I would have preferred to actually obtain some white P. Now
> THAT would have been cool. Utterly impossible given the primitive
> nature of my attempt...
>
> Steve Turner
Mellor writes an interesting story saying that this is the correct
version its discovery (rather a British version for he gives more
credit to Boyle): When Brand of Hamburg discovered phosphorus by
distilling evaporated urine, he obtained a small quantity of solid. At
the end of 1675 he sold this *secret* to D.Krafft for 37 British pounds
(worth in Mellor's time of 1912); he also informed J.Knuckel that it
was obtained from urine. Knuckle then himself obtained urine from
experimenting for few weeks. Solid phosphorus was also shown to Boyle
and others by Krafft, who told them that it was obtained from "part of
the human body". Boyle succeeded in obtaining solid P in 1681 (the
Germans did not let know the secret to him!!) and was the first one to
publish an account of method of making it.
Phosphorus was named from Greek :phos -light and -phero for "I carry".
Steve Turner
I have wondered what peculiar form of malodorous chemistry gives rise
to elemental phosphorus via heating of urine. My guess is that
organic materials first char, and at very high heat the carbon reduces
inorganic phosphates also found in urine.
At some point in the distant past I have seen a "home style" prep of
phosphorus, in which a paste made of carbon and phosphoric acid was
heated at very high temperature in a retort made of galvanized
plumbing. The distillate was collected under water. I've never tried
this, and given the toxicity of white P, don't intend to.
Steve Turner
faro...@hotmail.com
>I have wondered what peculiar form of malodorous chemistry gives rise
>to elemental phosphorus via heating of urine. My guess is that
>organic materials first char, and at very high heat the carbon reduces
>inorganic phosphates also found in urine.
I am wondering how much urine Brand of Hamburg must have collected over
a period to get a reasonable amount of phosphorus? Assuming a average
discharge of 1000 mL in 24 hours, it have taken atleast 3 months, only
to collect about 100 L urine...and to get grams of phosphorus, though
his house must be really stinky. How much phosphate does the urine
contain...perhaps in microgram quantities per liter unitl and unless
one is suffering from phosphatouria?
hanson
news:1101283542.7...@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
> > >> 22 Nov 2004 "hanson" <han...@quick.net> wrote:
> > >> >== Dry distillation of urine led to the discovery of Phosphorous.
>
> > Right you are. I actually tried doing this when I was a stupid kid.
> > I only succeeded in stinking up the garage pretty bad.
> > THAT would have been cool. Utterly impossible given the primitive
> > nature of my attempt...
> > Steve Turner
>
> Mellor writes an interesting story saying that this is the correct
> version its discovery (rather a British version for he gives more
> credit to Boyle): When Brand of Hamburg discovered phosphorus by
> distilling evaporated urine, he obtained a small quantity of solid. At
> the end of 1675 he sold this *secret* to D.Krafft for 37 British pounds
> (worth in Mellor's time of 1912); he also informed J.Knuckel that it
> was obtained from urine. Knuckle then himself obtained urine from
> experimenting for few weeks. Solid phosphorus was also shown to Boyle
> and others by Krafft, who told them that it was obtained from "part of
> the human body". Boyle succeeded in obtaining solid P in 1681 (the
> Germans did not let know the secret to him!!) and was the first one to
> publish an account of method of making it.
> Phosphorus was named from Greek :phos -light and -phero for "I carry".
>
Most people and even most chemists do know of the properties of
white Phosphorus only from textbooks and from TV war movies where
they see the white P2O5 smoke. Burning P is a horror, truly a horror.
"Phosphorus, the "light I carry", conjures up memories of yore.
Cup/Boy Scouts. Me, ~ 9-11 years old. Initiation/Scare/Courage exercises,
in a Cave/Mine Tunnel/shaft. So, the troop-leader handed me a large
water filled pickle jar full of whitish-yellow colored, cheesy/waxy looking
and feeling 5x.5" type sticks. Just like the chalk sticks in school. "That's
white Phosphorous. Burns easy. Don't rub it too hard or it'll ignite"
Order: "Go into the cave back to the waterfall and wait for the groups
of juniors to come in. Then scare the shit out of them by taking a stick
here and draw a skull on the wall and accompany it with wailing ghost
noises. "Yes sir, of course, siree bob" and I did.
It was a delicious delight to hear the juniors scream and see them flee
in panic back to the entrance, the moment they saw a faint green skull
out-line appear on the black wall in the darkness of the cave...ahahaha..
I think it was about the 5th or 6th troop that came in when I was drawing
the skull on the cave wall again that things went wrong. I must have
applied too much pressure to the fucking waxy white Phosphor crayon
in my fingers, such that the friction heated it to the ignition point. The
stick that so far was only faintly, phosphorescently ghostly glowing, now
suddenly started to sparkle and shooting out flames with splattering
brilliantly burning, white light-yellow green drops all over me.
In the darkness of the cave, in MY panic now, watching my right hand burn,
trying to wipe the fire off it with my left hand, it immediate also caught
fire and glowed phosphorescent ghostly green. I started to scream & tried
to wipe the shit off on my shirt and pants that promptly caught on fire too
and then.... because my right hand now began to hurt very, very bad
.... I stuck it into my mouth and tried to suck the glowing greenish
shit off it, spitting it out.... -- With my glowing hands and smoke stinking
pants and shirt, I luckily fell into the icy creek water under the water fall.
My screaming of course got reported and the leaders came in. They wiped
the phosphorus off me, and all the rags/shirts they did it with caught on
fire too. -- One guy swore that my teeth where glowing ghoulishly green.
What I best remember was that the skin hung off 3 fingers of each of my
hands. After having been bandaged up the real torment began. A 5 mile
ride home on my bicycle. When my dad saw my hands, he simply said:
"Dumbshit, next time you'll know better".
The week thereafter I went to the local library, where I got another scare.
It said that, IIRC, 0.3 grams of white phosphorous when ingested was
deadly and that it will cause bone cancer. In my mind I already I saw myself
at my funeral. I cried... ...but the Devil didn't want to have anything to
do with me...... yet... .ahahahaha.....AHAHAHAHA..... ahahahaha.......
ahahaha........ahahahanson
Shit! almost forgot: *** Enjoy chemistry!......but Fuck enviros! ***
Steve Turner
>Most people and even most chemists do know of the properties of
>white Phosphorus only from textbooks and from TV war movies where
>they see the white P2O5 smoke. Burning P is a horror, truly a horror.
It seems to me that the big horror is having it burning all over your
clothes, and in your *mouth* forcryingoutloud. Bona fide horror show.
You are lucky to be alive. Did any of your teeth fall out?
Steve Turner
Steve Turner
>I am wondering how much urine Brand of Hamburg must have collected over
>a period to get a reasonable amount of phosphorus? Assuming a average
>discharge of 1000 mL in 24 hours, it have taken atleast 3 months, only
>to collect about 100 L urine...and to get grams of phosphorus, though
>his house must be really stinky. How much phosphate does the urine
>contain...perhaps in microgram quantities per liter unitl and unless
>one is suffering from phosphatouria?
I've wondered the same ... don't have the answers.
Perhaps the sand that he used contained some source of phosphate.
His abode must have smelled pretty rotten. But people back then were
not quite as fastidious as modern humans. It wasn't uncommon for a
person to have but three baths in a lifetime: one at birth, one at
marriage, and one at death.
Steve Turner
EL
> [hanson]
> and then.... because my right hand now began to hurt very, very bad
> .... I stuck it into my mouth and tried to suck the glowing greenish
> shit off it, spitting it out....
> When my dad saw my hands, he simply said:
> "Dumbshit, next time you'll know better".
>
> The week thereafter I went to the local library, where I got another scare.
> It said that, IIRC, 0.3 grams of white phosphorous when ingested was
> deadly and that it will cause bone cancer.
[EL]
Damn! :-)
And your brain is still glowing since then Hanson.
Most probably you have ingested traces of phosphorous only enough for
your brain's lifetime requirements. ;-)
0.3 grams of pure white phosphorous is a very big dose, which I doubt
to have reached your guts.
Besides reacting with atmospheric oxygen, your skin's fat, your
mucous, your saliva and your teeth, the major quantity was in the air
as oxides.
You reported the "stinking smell" implying that you have inhaled some
of it, which have remained in your mucus-membrane guarded by your
first-line-defences.
It is quite possible that your blood have carried away some micrograms
that were ultimately consumed by your brain and bone.
The library book text did not mansion that fatality of that 0.3 grams
dose was measured for adults only.
Lucky enough, you were a kid with body / phosphorous demands, which it
got, in the worst experience. :-)
I bet that your teeth are not still glowing until today. :-)
Hahahahahahaha.
EL
hanson
> On 24 Nov 2004 "hanson" <han...@quick.net> wrote:
> >Most people and even most chemists do know of the properties of
> >white Phosphorus only from textbooks and from TV war movies where
> >they see the white P2O5 smoke. Burning P is a horror, truly a horror.
>
> It seems to me that the big horror is having it burning all over your
> clothes, and in your *mouth* forcryingoutloud. Bona fide horror show.
> You are lucky to be alive. Did any of your teeth fall out?
> Steve Turner
>
How sweet and empathic of you. Thanks, Steve.
Yes, I remember well that I worried about teeth falling out. The troop
leader, called "Horse", a med. student, told me for weeks after the
incident that I should pull on and rattle my teeth, hard and daily, for
loose teeth would be the first sign that I had white-Phos poisoning.
I can't remember whether any fell out but they sure felt loose to me,
probably more from my constant paranoid manipulation then from
the P-effects.
Another thing that I learned from Horse, and I found it to be true, was
that med. Drs. are nothing but educated butchers. That was for me
good enough reason not to study medicine later on. My Dad's 2nd advice
had more immediate impact. He told me to stay away from chemistry
and look into rocket science. Yeah, right! A few years later....ahahaha...
I decided to do what daddy said and I did "study" how to make a novel
hi-impulse rocket engine. Not by throwing them piddly litte N2 and CO2
molecules out of the exhaust jet, but going whole hog, state of the art
for/with heavy high speed stuff. So, for weeks I was filing off fine granules
of Magnesium metal from a 60 lb Mag ingot that my crony had stolen
from the local foundry. When I had a few pound-moles of this Magnesium
grit I mixed it stochiometrically with powdered KMnO4. Carefully.
There was this great conical heap of white metallic grit and the beautiful
violet crystals, sitting on a an aluminum plate, designed to propel my
super rocket. Fuck Van Braun. My impulse rich rocket fuel producing MgO,
K2O and MnO2... eminently more powerful...ahaha... Then I had a stroke
of pure genius. I decided to add a flux accelerator the mix. So, I added
some crushed NH4HF2. In my exitement I didn't worry that this "wet"
Bifluoride slurry could "accelerate" my rocket fuel too fast. Anyway,
as I mixed it, the heap began to smell strongly like ozone, and it turned
brownish. I may have seen some fumes, but at that moment I dropped
my spatula and I bent over to pick it off the floor. Just a my head was
level with the work bench, everything turned brilliant, glaringly brilliant
white accompanied by a short piercing whistling sound. Then it was very
still & quiet... and dark... "Eventually" I could see again somewhat and I
found myself coughing in a whitish brown cloud of smoke. Mom came in,
took one look at me and screamed. To make the long story short, they
rushed me to the educated butchers who saw to it that my eye lashes,
my eye brows and all my hair would resprout. The Mg-flash had cinched
off all the hair off my face and head. I lost my then girlfriend over this.
She said that I looked gross without lashes and brows.......ahahaha...
Well, win a few-lose a few... These and many more such "happenens"
occurred with/for and to me to this very day. In time I discovered that one
doesn't fold the tent, close the umbrella and kick the bucket as fast as is
generally advertised... ahahahahaha... only green shits & fucking lawyers
have dissenting views since the cocksuckers make their morbid living off it.
.....ahahaha..... I still may report on the recent experiments about ball
lightning, at Gleaner9, as promised,... if it gets declassified... ahahaha...
Hey, life's a bowl of cherries, sweet & sour ones, pits, the whole bit...
Anyway, thanks for your kind sympathies, Steve.
Your note was balsam for my soul.
Now, I gotta go to Hilo airport to collect my whole tribe for the up-coming
pinapple-turkey massacre............Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.
ahahaha.......ahahahanson
[hanson]
Dirk Bruere at Neopax
>
> There was this great conical heap of white metallic grit and the beautiful
> violet crystals, sitting on a an aluminum plate, designed to propel my
> super rocket. Fuck Van Braun. My impulse rich rocket fuel producing MgO,
> K2O and MnO2... eminently more powerful...ahaha... Then I had a stroke
> of pure genius. I decided to add a flux accelerator the mix. So, I added
> some crushed NH4HF2. In my exitement I didn't worry that this "wet"
> Bifluoride slurry could "accelerate" my rocket fuel too fast. Anyway,
> as I mixed it, the heap began to smell strongly like ozone, and it turned
> brownish. I may have seen some fumes, but at that moment I dropped
> my spatula and I bent over to pick it off the floor. Just a my head was
> level with the work bench, everything turned brilliant, glaringly brilliant
> white accompanied by a short piercing whistling sound. Then it was very
> still & quiet... and dark... "Eventually" I could see again somewhat and I
> found myself coughing in a whitish brown cloud of smoke. Mom came in,
> took one look at me and screamed. To make the long story short, they
> rushed me to the educated butchers who saw to it that my eye lashes,
> my eye brows and all my hair would resprout. The Mg-flash had cinched
> off all the hair off my face and head. I lost my then girlfriend over this.
You should have tried mixing up a few kg of red P and chlorate for a real kick.
> She said that I looked gross without lashes and brows.......ahahaha...
> Well, win a few-lose a few... These and many more such "happenens"
> occurred with/for and to me to this very day. In time I discovered that one
> doesn't fold the tent, close the umbrella and kick the bucket as fast as is
> generally advertised... ahahahahaha... only green shits & fucking lawyers
> have dissenting views since the cocksuckers make their morbid living off it.
> .....ahahaha..... I still may report on the recent experiments about ball
> lightning, at Gleaner9, as promised,... if it gets declassified... ahahaha...
Is that real free BL or the fake uwave kind?
--
Dirk
The Consensus:-
The political party for the new millenium
http://www.theconsensus.org