Shocking Hulk Hogan Sex Tape: A Librul Conspiracy?!!
The celebrity wrestler is a high-profile Romney backer. So you know
where this is going.
October 5, 2012 |
Hulk Hogan visits Fox & Friends in Tampa during the 2012 Republican
You know you've been in the business of covering the right for too
long when you find yourself predicting the next great right-wing
conspiracy theory. And here I sit, pondering the pending outrage that
will likely greet the sex tape of Romney endorser Hulk Hogan getting
it on with a woman who may or may not be his best friend's ex-wife,
posted yesterday on Gawker.
As reported by Gawker's A.J. Daulerio, the video footage, whose
existence was first reported by TMZ, was sent to him on a DVD by an
anonymous source. Daulerio then describes the action in the film in an
unfortunate level of minute detail, failing to note that Hogan IS A
HIGH-PROFILE ROMNEY BACKER. You see where I'm going with this?
Up top, you'll see one minute from the 30 minutes of footage taken of
59-year-old Hulk Hogan, professional wrestler, Real Life American Hero
to many, [having intercourse] with a woman rumored to be the ex-wife
of his best friend, a famous radio DJ named Bubba the Love Sponge.
This footage was stealthily circulated last April. TMZ reported its
existence , The Dirty showed some screen shots , and Hulk lawyered up
because he claims he was "secretly filmed." Last week, a burned DVD
copy of Hulk having sex with the woman rumored to be Heather Clem
(Bubba's ex-wife), was delivered to us through an anonymous source.
They wanted no payment. They wanted no credit. Their only request was
that we watch it. So I did—all 30:17 of it—and hyperbole aside, it's a
And those Gawker readers, like they even TRY to get it. No, they're
all about the fact that Daulerio describes the Hulkster's member as
being the size of a Thermos. But you 'n' me -- we know what's really
going on here, right?
Gawker posted that video exactly 356 days after Hulk Hogan went on Fox
& Friends to say that he was no longer an Obama supporter . I'm sure
that 356 means something, but I can't quite remember what right now.
Anyway, take my word for it. And then, in August, Hogan went on Fox &
Friends again to declare his support for Mitt Romney (and promote
his beach shop in Tampa) during the Republican National Convention.
Here's what the libs are surely going after him for: Hulk said of
comments the president made about small businesses:
"That goes against everything I feel, know and love about this
You know they had it in for him then, right? First, polls. Then jobs
numbers . Now this.
Well, you get the gist. Now, I wonder whether Romney will disavow
Hogan's support, just like he repudiated Ted Nugent's invitation to
Obama to "suck on my machine gun" -- but oh, wait, he didn't repudiate
And the religious right. Do you think they'll care?
Yeah, about as much as they cared about Romney pivoting to the center,
being all Mr. Bipartisan Massachusetts Health Care in the presidential
debate. And even better than Mitt, the Hulk wears a cross.
Waiting for that Rick Santorum snuff tape -- you know, the one where
he kills Big Bird .