(The camera fades back in from the commercial to the Fleet Center)
MM: Welcome back UNWF Fans. About that last match, Scott Storm thought he
had that one in the bag, but Dan G. outsmarted him the whole way.
SW: Try out POWERED him the whole way and you’d be closer.
MM: Whatever. It was a great match either way. As controversial as Scott
Storm is, he has come close to really pulling off some big matches. If this
guy gets one in the bag, look out!
SW: I hear you. It’s not easy to go against a "PowerHouse" Dan G.
MM: Well, Scott Storm did challenge Dan, not the other way around.
SW: Oh.
MM: That’s what I thought. Oh, I wanted to talk about a certain wrestler.
SW: Who’s that?
MM: Big Daddy Cool. This guy, from what I understand, couldn’t understand
the fact that the UNWF cannot be threatened by its own wrestlers. In order
to be successful in this federation, you have to earn it. NOT cheat and lie.
SW: Unless you’re Brian Edwards.
MM: Quiet. To clear up any misconceptions, Big Daddy Cool has been fired
from the UNWF. He will no longer take any part in any UNWF sanctioned event.
He has been pink-slipped and banned for life. Also, we urge all the
organizations out there to be careful when dealing with this man. He does
not deserve to wrestle after he tried to ruin all the hard work we put in.
SW: Well, after getting serious, what is the next match supposed to be?
MM: It is supposed to be the leader of the BAB, "Big Time" Brian Edwards,
against Axel Aron.
SW: That guy has been really quiet since his win at the PPV. He beat Scott
Storm handily in that match, but we haven’t heard from him since.
MM: That was a pretty civil remark coming from the likes of you.
SW: "The Likes of Me?" What the hell is that supposed to mean?
(Aura enters the ring once more. The fans give her a huge pop, but it is
mostly whistles and cat-calls)
Aura: All right, settle down.
(A shout of "Will you marry me?" comes from the crowd)
Aura: I don’t think so, hun. I only like good-looking men. This next match
is between Axel Aron-
("Rock and Roll Part II" rocks on to the loudspeakers, and Axel Aron runs
down to the ring amidst a mediocre pop. He is wearing a plain black
wrestling outfit with black boots)
MM: It looks like Aron is trying to find his roots here in Boston, where he
grew up.
SW: Whatever, he still looks lame and boring.
Aura: And, the leader of the Bad….um…A…Brigade, "BIG TIME" BRIAN EDDDDWARDS!
("Black Sabbath" by Black Sabbath kicks on over the P.A, and "Big Time"
Brian Edwards walks casually to the ring to an incredibly negative pop. He
wears a black and red wrestling suit with the "Bad Ass Brigade" stamp of
approval on it. He has shaved his hair almost completely off. The strands of
hair remaining are spiked and dyed blond)
MM: I didn’t know a crowd could be this negative!
SW: I did. I heard it all my career for those other guys.
MM: No, for you. Not the "Other guys," you.
SW: You know, you always-
DING! DING! DING!
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
"Big Time" Brian Edwards
vs.
Axel Aron
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
MM: And we’re off! As much as I want Axel Aron to get this one, I think
Brian Edwards is just too powerful.
SW: He is a tough guy.
MM: You’re not kidding. He eliminated our champion from the Royal Rumble. To
the
ring now, Edwards and Aron lock up, standing fujiwara armbar by Aron!
SW: And look how he’s twisting Edwards’ arm! Edwards yanks Aron forward-
MM: SHORTARM CLOTHESLINE! Aron sent Sprawling!
SW: This isn’t even going to be a contest.
MM: How do you know that?
SW: Believe me, I kno-
MM: I never believe you and I never will.
SW: Is that the most intelligent comeback you have?
MM: Shut up.
SW: Ohhhh! Tough guy!
MM: I SAID SHUT UP!
(The two wrestlers look up toward the announcers’ booth)
MM: Oops. Sorry!
SW: You’re going to get us fired!
MM: Anyway, the two men locked again, KNEE LIFT BY EDWARDS!
SW: PILEDRIVER!
MM: Aron’s head really smacked the floor that time!
SW: Edwards with the cover-
1
2
Kickout!
MM: Barely even a two count, as Aron still has a lot of fight left in him.
SW: This match has been pretty one-sided, though. I think Aron better get
involved
soon or it might be too late.
MM: I think he might of heard you, to the ropes!
SW: FLYING CROSS BODY BLOCK!!!
MM: NO! EDWARDS CATCHES IT!
SW: Flips him over, RUNNING PILEDRIVER!
MM: Hey, wasn’t that Big Daddy Cool’s finisher? It must’ve been. I guess
Brian
Edwards sending a statement to the UNWF officials here tonight.
SW: Yeah. He was really angry when he learned about BDC’s firing.
MM: Cheaters like cheaters. Anyway, I would have to guess that Brian Edwards
has this match won, all he has to do is cover Aron.
SW: He does!
1
2
HE LIFTS ARON!
MM: This has never worked! Every time you lift someone, it never turns out
right!
("Miserlou" (or the theme from Pulp Fiction) storms onto the loudspeakers,
and TKO runs out to ringside hoisting a Big Daddy Cool cardboard cut out
into the air. The fans begin to throw things, and one fan grabs onto the cut
out. After wrenching it away from the fan, TKO waits at ringside.)
SW: The referee doesn’t know what to do here.
MM: I don’t think he’ll have to wait much longer.
SW: With Edwards you never know.
MM: Edwards hoisting Aron into the air, someone has to stop this, and
ANOTHER RUNNING PILEDRIVER!
SW: Oh this is bad. Aron could get seriously hurt here.
MM: Big Time runs to the turnbuckles, grabs the BDC sign from TKO, and lifts
it high in the air.
SW: Listen to the fans!
(The ring is thundering with boos, and Edwards seems to be loving it)
MM: He drops the cut out, points to the sign, and-
SW: BARNBURNER! EDWARDS HITS THE BARNBURNER!
MM: He hooks the leg-
1
2
3!!!
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Winner: "Big Time" Brian Edwards
Via pinfall
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
MM: It appears Edwards wants to say something-
(A ring attendant tosses Edwards a mic. He moves Aron over to the
turnbuckle, and sits on top of him. TKO climbs through the ropes, and lays
the BDC cut out against the opposite turnbuckle.)
Edwards: I just wanted to introduce one of my new friends, stop moving down
there!
( TKO runs over, lifts Axel Aron on top of his shoulders, and performs his
finisher, the TKO)
MM: This is just sick.
Edwards: SHUT THE HELL UP! Eric Wood, you are nothing but afraid of the BAB.
You tried to cut us down, make us insignificant. Well I got news for you,
Mr. President. Hey, hey, hey, THE GANG’S ALL HERE!
(The crowd begins to point and look toward the back, when the BAB theme
music turns on.)
MM: Fans, we have to go to a commercial. We’ll be right back!
(The camera fades with Brian Edwards still jawing at the camera, and a
wrestler runs down to ringside)
