[GCW] Season's Beatings Preview: 19 Jan 99
Mr. Warren
the old school. Remember those Survivor Series: Feel the Heat specials
they had on USA the Saturday Night before the PPV with Gorilla Monsoon and
Rowdy Roddy Piper? Those ruled. They're back.]
[The set consists of a screen-length white desk which is bent in somewhat
of a V, with the branches coming towards the camera on each side and the
middle section of the desk being perpindicular with camera. On the left
sits Mark Erickson ... "The Host with the Most" ... and he's in a good
mood. He sits wearing a GCW Polo Shirt and a backwards hat. He's got his feet
propped up on the desk as he leans back in his chair.]
[On the right is Mr. Screw GCW. Yeah, James McMullen isn't happy about
what is going on here in the GCW. You know what's even cooler? You can go
take a look at these guys on the GCW Webpage. Yeah, woo. In the middle,
above the straight part of the desk, is a window of sorts. There is a
GCW logo on the window, and obviously behind it, is a monitor.]
[Some electronica plays labeled "Straight Up" as the show kicks in. It
only plays for about ten seconds before it actually fades out, though.]
ME: Welcome to the GCW, folks! This is the Season's Beatings preview
show! And tonight, we're going to be bringing you three -big-
matches! We're only TWELVE days away from one of the most
spectacular shows that we have put on pay-per-view!
JM: [sarcastically] I'm so excited.
ME: One person that might be at the show is Scott "The Fop" Rogers,
folks. Let's take a look at what has been going on with the
Fop-Daddy lately.
[SCENE: The GCW Interview Area. Scott "The Fop" Rogers stands alongside
John Boyd. Rogers doesn't look his usual buoyant self, but more like a man
whose plans have severely backfired. Which is, in reality, what he is.
He's wearing a white polo shirt with "GCW Crew" embroidered in small red
letters over his left pec.]
JB: Fans, you join me at this time with former GCW World Television
Champion Scott "The Fop" Rogers.
[We can already tell this isn't going to be the usual, run-of-the-mill
Rogers-Boyd encounter. Boyd's acting seriously, and as we've already
discovered, it's a safe bet that Rogers will be doing so also.]
JB: Scott, I guess it's fair to say that over the past two or three
weeks, well.. it's been a fairly turbulent time for you. Firstly
you lose the TV Title to "The Wolf," Ray Tung, then proclaim that in
fact you lost to him _on purpose_, and then you book Tung in a match
with Derek "Sky" Walker, the man who helped you win the belt in the
first place, and Walker comes away with the belt.
Now, either I'm missing something here, or it would appear that this
hasn't exactly turned out how you'd planned it.
[Rogers allows himself a smirk.]
SR: Welll.. yeah, I guess ya _could_ say that, Boydy.
[Boyd smiles, realising Rogers is trying to sugar-coat what from his point
of view is a fairly dire situation.]
SR: But I'll tell ya somethin' _else_ ya could say for nothin', Boyd.
Walker's just gone and made the biggest mistake of his career. _No-
one_ crosses The Fop.
JB: With all due respect, Scott, to the average GCW viewer, what
happened _last_ week on the Aftermath, would seem as if you'd
discarded the friendship of Derek Walker, and sided with Ray Tung!
[Rogers pauses for a moment. Then speaks.]
SR: Well, Boydy, that just goes to show the "average GCW viewer" knows
squat.
Let me ask ya a question, Boyd.
JB: Sure.
SR: Why do ya think what happened between me and Johnny Rajah happened?
JB: Because you'd decided you didn't want to team up with _him_ and VK,
but Derek Walker?
[Rogers snickers.]
SR: No, Boydy.. guess again.
JB: Yes, I remember you _said_ it was because Rajah didn't help you out
against Ted Bruce in the final of the GCW Television Title
tournament..
SR: Yeah!
[Rogers speaks with great mock-enthusiasm.]
SR: That's right, Boyd. And since that's what I _said_, wouldn't ya
think that's probably what the real reason _was_?
JB: Well.. I'm not sure. As I just said, it seemed to me like you'd
forged a friendship with Walker, and Rajah just didn't fit into
those plans.
[Rogers snickers once more.]
SR: Boydy, do ya _seriously_ think The Fop's gonna be "forgin'
friendships" with the likes o' Derek _Walker_?
[Rogers shakes his head.]
SR: I thought ya knew me better than that, Johnno.
JB: What do you _mean_!? I thought you and Walker were..
SR: What I mean, Boydy, is.. Walker's the kinda guy guys like Simpson
like to have around. I ain't gonna mince me words, Boyd.. Walker
hero-worships me. I mean, the guy'd do _anythin'_ for me to say I
liked him. And _usually_ I don't got a problem with that.
But Walker's different. See, he says I brought him into the GCW..
and, yeah, I went along with it. But it sure as hell ain't true. I
didn't even know the kid _existed_ 'til he started badmouthin' me
and Teddy.
But off camera, he's a different guy. He kept tellin' me how much
he wished some day he could be the second comin' of The Fop. How he
"didn't mean" what he was sayin' 'bout me.. he just wanted to get in
the spotlight by bandyin' me name about. And I gotta admit it,
Boyd, I was flattered..
JB: I'm not surprised..
[Rogers smirks at Boyd's oh-so-serious manner.]
SR: But, Boydy.. once I stopped ignorin' him, and started talkin' to
him, he was like..
[Rogers stops to think of a decent analogy.]
SR: Yeah, he was like one o' them old dogs that follows ya around 'cause
they don't got an owner. Ya know, Boyd?
[I'm not sure Boyd _does_ know, and I'm almost _certain_ he doesn't believe
The Fop, but he nods anyway.]
SR: Yeah, thought ya might. Anyway, Boydy.. got round to the night o'
the TV Title tourney final, and Walks asks me if he can help me win
the belt. I tell him I already got it sorted, with Rajah.. so then
he asks if Rajah don't turn _up_, can he help me? I'm like, "yeah,
kid.. whatever."
[Boyd continues to nod, not wanting to interrupt another of Rogers' nigh on
unbelievable tales.]
SR: I mean, me and John were like _that_ <crossing his fingers>.. I knew
if I _needed_ it, he'd be there for me.
Believe me, Boydy, I ain't sayin' I _forgive_ Rajah, but I gotta
admit, way that match was goin', it was pretty obvious I didn't need
no help to win the belt.
[Yeah, right, Scott.]
SR: But when Walker came out and made it that bit easier, I got to
thinkin'.. "where the hell was Rajah? How come I gotta rely on some
scrote like _this_?" Walker came back to me locker room, opened up
the champagne, and I ain't ashamed to admit it, Boyd.. I was
_pissed_ at Rajah. And when Walker said he'd do the interview for
me, I gotta admit, I thought the kid was Okay.
JB: Right...
[Surely Boyd's not becoming bored with this long winded piece of nonsense?
He is, by jove.]
JB: But eventually you remembered why you didn't like him in the first
place, so decided to team up with Tung, and let the Wolf destroy him
for you on the Aftermath?
[Boyd's synopsis isn't far off the mark.. but Rogers doesn't like it.]
SR: Nah, Boyd.. see, like I said, Tung was _always_ under our control.
Like I said, either Jeff or me's been payin' him since he _joined_
the GCW.
JB: And Walker didn't know this.
SR: All Walker knew was that he'd stopped pissin' me off, and I didn't
_mind_ him hangin' around.
JB: But, again with all due respect, Sky hasn't in fact lost a match in
the GCW yet! You're talking about him like he's some kind of
_gopher_, but he's a tremendous athlete in his own right.
SR: Whatever, Boyd.. if that's what ya think, good luck to ya. But,
see, remember I said Walker's just made the biggest mistake of his
career?
JB: Yes..
SR: What he's done, Boydy, is just booked himself a match with me at
Season's Beatin's! See, like I said, he's been sayin' on camera how
he's the only guy in the GCW who can beat the Fop.. but backstage
he was all like "oh, Fop, what can I do for ya _now_" after he'd
cleaned me boots or somethin'.. well, 'cause the people who _watch_
the GCW every week don't know what goes on off camera..
JB: ..unless you _tell_ them of course.
[Rogers smirks.]
SR: ..yeah. Well, they've been told how Walker's got what it takes to
beat The Fop.. at Season's Beatin's they're gonna see which one of
us two's the liar.. 'cause I'm tellin' ya right here, Boydy.. Walker
don't stand a _chance_.
[The air of arrogance is back.]
JB: Even if he's joined the X-Assassins as it would appear?
SR: Boydy, he could have the entire GCW _roster_ interfere in this one..
I tell ya, I never wanted to beat no-one as much as I wanted to beat
Teddy.. but Bruce don't got _nothin'_ on Walker! Only when he's
beat _The Fop_ can he say he's undefeated in GCW, Boyd. Trust me,
Boyd.. I ain't jokin'.
[Rogers walks off set.]
JB: I'm sure you're not!
Fans, Scott "The Fop" Rogers.
[Cut back to the studio.]
ME: So, Scott "The Fop" Rogers challenging, no, -telling- Derek Walker
that he will defend the TV Title against him at Season's Beatings.
JM: I like the guy, Mark. He's got the weight to throw around and he
does it. Rogers and Walker, yeah, it should be tremendous. Those
two are some guys I can actually stand but, if they're going to
fight, I guess they're going to fight.
ME: Well, folks, I understand that we've got some activity down in the
Pittsburgh Civic Arena .. let's take you down there to John Boyd.
John?
[Cuts to the Pittsburgh Civic Arena ... ]
[John Boyd stands in mid-ring with his trusty microphone in hand. He waits
for the crowd to settle slightly and then begins.]
JB: Over the past few months we here in Global Championship Wrestling
have seen a newcomer to the sport. Some say he's brash... some say
he's arrogant and conceited. He'll tell you he's all talent. One
thing that everyone has to say about him after last week is that he
is the new GCW World Television Champion. Ladies and gentlemen,
Derek....Sky.....Walker!!!
["Sky's the Limit" begins as Walker's Number One Fan, Destiny strolls out
from the back. Following slowly behind her is Walker, himself. Destiny is
attired in a shimmering short black dress and Walker is finely attired in a
grey Armani suit with black shirt. He unbuttons the jacket to reveal the
shiny belt he won from Ray Tung last week. The cat calls drown out the
smattering of cheers as Walker plays to the crowd, gyrating his waist as he
makes his way to the ring. Walker climbs up on the apron and vaults into
the ring. He turns and holds the ropes open as Destiny barely makes in into
the ring with her body still tucked away in her dress.]
JB: Sky, you have certainly made your way up the GCW ladder in quick
fashion...
DW: First off, Johhny, it's a pleasure to be out here with you once
again and yes you can say that Sky has definitely made a fast track
to success here but it's nothing that shouldn't be expected.
JB: [with a sarcastic edge] and who would know better than you, right?
DW: Absolutely.
JB: Of course, there has been some backlash during that time. You
haven't exactly made any friends along the way.
DW: Listen Johnny, this isn't a place to build friends. Sure it's nice
to have an ally wherever you go but what you do in the ring alone is
what makes you the success and the legend.
JB: You can't actually call yourself a legend. You've been in the sport
for less than a year.
DW: Legend in the making then. [Walker smiles slyly] Modesty has always
been one of my best qualities. When you compile the gold and the
win-loss record that Sky has had in the past 9 months there is no
doubt about how successful Sky is.
JB: Last week was definitely one of the best in your short career.
Winning the Television title had to be a thrill but you also caused
quite the commotton as well with a couple of things you did before
your title win. Belting Scott Rogers with a chair for one.
DW: You know as satisfying as winning that match and the title from Ray
Tung was it almost paled in comparison to knocking the stuffing out
of that ingrate Rogers. The match was a foregone conclusion, the
chairshot heard round the world didn't have all that certainty. It
took the precise timing that only a man like Sky has.
JB: Things seemed to be running smoothly for you and him and then they
appeared to have disolved under friendly terms.
DW: You should know that appearances can be deceiving. Rogers had is
own agenda from the start and it didn't involve anything to do with
a partnership with Sky. He wanted a taste of the gold and Sky gave
it to him. He paid that back by stealing some gold of mine back up
north. Then all of a sudden it's all about Ray Tung and suddenly
instead of playing the lead role, Sky has some bit part in the play.
Well, Sky doesn't do well when he's not center stage. So, in one
fell swoop, Sky took out both of them and now the show is back to
award winning again with Sky in the lead.
JB: Shortly after that "shot heard round the world" you gave the
X-Assassin sign. It was so surprising to everyone, including the
X-Assassins. Are you now a member of the X-Assassins.
DW: Point blank question, Johnny. Ok... let me say this. Sky is X-
ellent, X-citing, X-tra special & X-tremely talented BUT.... Sky is
not a member of the X-Assassins. Would Sky like to be one. [pausing]
One does never know something like that at times. That symbolic
gesture was one of support without association. A sign that although
Sky can do what ever he wants whenever he wants, he's a damn good
ally to have and a nightmare to have as an enemy. Rogers was an ally
and received gold. He is now an enemy and received pain. Whether it
be the X-Assassins or Dark Carnival, even a single individual or
team, Sky is out there and is glad to be of service. Would be
willing to consider membership opportunities and is always happy to
be seen with others that strive to be as great as himself.
JB: With the record you have I would have to agree with you regarding
you worth in one of those groups but I can't imagine the clashes
that you would have with them.
DW: Sky said he would consider an offer but would be happy to assist.
The benefits of not being allied with one group or person solely can
sometimes outweigh the benefits of being part of a group. Sky is
definitely one that doesn't need his championship protected.
JB: Speaking of that championship, who do you see as your biggest
threat?
DW: Threat?? In this league?? Sky plans on a long title reign and it
doesn't matter how often or who it is defended against. Case
closed... interview over. Ice the champagne and hit the music!!
["Sky's the Limit" begins as Walker and Destiny leave the ring.]
[Cuts back to the studio .. ]
ME: Well, Derek "Sky" Walker making no mention of any sort of title shot
for Scott Rogers, so what will happen? Well, that's up to the GCW
Front Office who has been working hard to get us a great card for
this Pay-Per-View coming up on the 31st.
JM: Well they better because I sure aren't going to field the complaint
line this time like Warren had me doing -last- time.
ME: One person who will be in Cleveland, Ohio on January 31st is Viktor
Karasopolis, as he defends his GCW World Heavyweight Title in a
match in which not only the X-Assassins are banned but -all-
employed GCW wrestlers are banned from ringside! The consequences
are sure to be heavy. Let's hear from Viktor Karasopolis.
[It's dark. Like, nighttime or something. There are cops cars near the curb
and people milling around and there is even some snow on the ground. its
coooooooooold. The camera pans over to a window pane that has been totally
smashed through. There is a new pane leaning against the wall, awaiting
installation. The shards of the broken glass that once littered the ground
are cleaned up (as promised by GCW management). The cops are leaning
against their cars, 'questioning' Viktor Karasopolis, who is in his street
clothes, complete with heavy jacket. He has his duffel bag over his
shoulder and doesn't seem to really MIND this line of questioning, whatever
it is.]
C1: So, you deliberately threw the victim through the window?
VK: Well, I wouldn't say that. I mean, I deliberately threw him but....
I wouldn't say I MEANT for him to go through the window.
C2: So the assault was deliberate?
VK: Of course it was. Just about everything we do in GCW is deliberate.
Except for that one time, backstage..I accidentally hit John Rajah
with a golf club I was swinging...right in the chin. Damn, that had
to hurt. Never live that down...
C1: Sir, please.
VK: Oh, sorry. Yes, the 'assault' as you put it, was deliberate.
C2: As we put it? Excuse me, sir....but how would you put it?
VK: [He thinks for a moment] Um... a horizontal piledriver?
C1: A horizontal PILEDRIVER? What were you two doing...WRESTLING?
VK: [Who is, obviously, shocked] Um, yes sir. That's exactly what we
were doing.
[He shows his GCW duffel to the cops.]
VK: We're both professional wrestlers.
C2: I see....still, thats reckless endangerment and negligence, we may
have to take you downtown.
VK: You have GOT to be kidding me..you're going to arrest me? Why don't
you arrest Brandon Simpson, dammit....HE is the one who broke the
window!
C1: Mr. Simpson is the victim sir. He is on his way to the hospital for
evaluation. Besides, on what charges would we arrest him?
VK: Disturbing the peace, dammit!
C2: That's not how things work, sir.
VK: It is too, I've seen it before. That's what you guys did to Axel
Foley!
C1: Sir, that was a MOVIE....played for laughs. 'Haha' and all that. In
reality, we'd never make that arrest.
VK: [cursing under his breath] I watch too many movies.
C2: Maybe so, sir. We need your name for our records.
VK: Viktor Karasopolis.
C1: .......
C2: .......
C1: Sir, this isn't some kind of joke. Tell us your name.
VK: DAMMIT, I just did! [He sighs] My name is Viktor Karasopolis. K-A-
R-A-S-O-P-O-L-I-S. I'm Greek. I'm the GCW World Heavyweight
Champion and I was just defending myself from an attack by Brandon
Simpson.
C2: Ok, sir..sorry sir. You say this was Self Defense? Have you and
Mister Simpson had problems in the past?
[Viktor just stares at them both, stunned silent]
C2: I'll take that as a yes. So..Mr. Karasopolis, you say you are the
current champion. I guess Mr. Simpson is one of your...opponents?
[Viktor sighs]
VK: No, he's one of my neighbors. OF COURSE he is one of my opponents.
I don't just beat on random people. Just the guys who fight me in
the ring.
C1: Guys? Plural? There are others, sir?
VK: Yeah, others. Simpson has a whole gang of em. Devine, Maze,
Steele....the X-Cops.
C2: You've beaten up ex-cops?!
C1: [getting miffed] That's not anyway to endear yourselves to us, sir.
VK: [rolling his eyes] No..no...no.....not EX-Cops.....the X-Cops. As in
the LETTER X. They're these police officers from Bizarro World who
like beating the hell outta people.
C2: So now you're saying Simpson has corrupt cops on his payroll....what
department are these out of?
VK: [smirking] My guess is L.A.
C1: Ah, well that explains it. So Simpson and his gang attacked you?
And you were just trying to defend yourself?
VK: That's it..that's all there was to it. I mean, I was just trying to
win my match tonight, thats all. Me and my partner, Matt Kamakazee.
We were taking it to Simpson and Maze.
[The cops just do that 'smile and nod till he is done' thing]
VK: All hell broke loose. Our managers started getting into it, then
Big Bubba Johnson came out...
C1: Who, sir?
VK: Oh...Bubba Johnson, another wrestler. He came out, hit Maze over
the head with a banjo, then stole Godzilla from ringside and took
off. We won the match that way.
C2: .....
C1: .....
[The cops just look at each other and sigh. The scene fades out, then back
in, with Viktor is a holding cell at the local police precinct. He looks
pissed.]
VK: What is WRONG with you people? I'm not drunk. I'm not crazy. Geez,
just go home and ask your kids. Dammit, we won tonight.
GSC: Sir, please calm down. We're looking into the situation.
[-Ed. Note GSC = Generic Station Cop]
VK: Looking into what situation? We won our match and then a fight broke
out. Dammit. My wife is waiting at the hotel for me. Let me out of
here.
GSC: We will sir, but first....could you DESCRIBE this 'Godzilla' please?
[He takes out a pad and paper]
[The camera fades as VK buries his face in his hands and whimpers. You can
hear his voice get small..]
VK: I'm just a wild and crazy guy....
[Cuts over to ... ]
[Tommy Kain and Ken Stanley are in their normal street clothes and they are
sitting on probably a locker room type bench in front of a GCW banner.]
TK: [Talking Calmly] You know last week we went into Youngstown, Ohio
and we fought the best team in the GCW right now. Now, we aren't
going to sit here and bitch and moan and whine about not winning
those tag titles. Sure it was a no contest, which means nobody won
the match...but to us, The X-Cops won that match because we are not
holding the tag team titles around our waists right now. We thought
we had a chance, and hey X-Cops we ain't taking nothing away from
you guys inside that ring...we know that you two are right now the
team to beat, and we didn't do that.
KS: [Talking Calmly] You see we went into that arena, and we didn't
perform as well as we believe we should have. We are former GCW
_World_ Heavyweight Tag Team Champions, and we let ourselves get
handcuffed and beaten by a bunch of misfits. By not winning that
match, a lot of people would say it was a moral victory....well let
me tell you...there are _no_ moral victories in the GCW. No wait,
strike that, there are no moral victories in _wrestling_. Nobody
gives a crap if you went in there a put on a good show, because
nobody remembers the losers, nobody remembers the other team in the
no contest...they look at who has the titles, and they say "That
team won."
TK: And they are right. In every match...there has to be an underdog.
Sometimes that underdog actually pulls off the upset of the year.
Well X-Cops in our heads, we placed you two as the underdogs because
we expected to be better than you that night. We expected to walk
out of Ohio and into Pittsburgh the next week as the new champions.
Sure nobody else probably had you down as the underdog, but
everybody else has not dreamed of holding those titles for a second
time.
KS: We let ourselves down as wrestlers, and as a tag team. We didn't
do what we were supposed to do and that is show everybody in the
world that we deserve to hold those titles. We wanted something so
bad, but we just didn't put enough effort into getting what we
wanted. I mean hell, sure The High Flyers will be back in the tag
title scene, but you know what....we're not ready and Ohio proved
it.
[Speaks a little louder...] Because you see when we lost to the
X-Cops a light went off and gave us a message that we need to go
through the tag team circuit. We need to show _EACH_ and _EVERY_
God damn person in that dressing room what we got here.
TK: [Speaking in a very loud voice.] And you know a lot of crap goes on
in that dressing room. You have got some wrestlers that are
respected more than the god damn owner of the GC [BEEP] W. You have
some wrestlers that don't complete the task they are
assigned...sometimes if you're lucky a god damn party breaks out
when a Viktor Karasapolis or a Matt Kamakazee walk through those
doors. Some wrestlers are very layed back, they show up when they
are told and just wrestle, sometimes they don't do crap and are
considered to be the number one contender, and that's ok. Then you
have the people that don't want to "work" with you.
[Speaks in an impressionable voice.] You're not a big enough star to
work with me.
[Goes back to his regular voice.] These people especially these
snobby piss ants that think they are better than everybody else,
and don't want to work with you because you don't equal
ratings..they criticize others for doing the same god damn [beep]
that they do. It's like a Jehovah's Witness getting pissed off at a
phone company for calling all the time for them to switch companies.
And before all you "smart marks" get pissed off at us, you better
realize that this crap has to be said....there is no keeping this
crap to ourselves anymore. People want to bring our personal lives
in the GCW, hey that's fine...go ahead be my guest....just a lot of
people in the GCW don't realize this is not the easiest gig in town,
and not just anybody gets to come through those dressing room
doors....
KS: Oh and you can't forget the people that were once practically
beloved back there, and worshiped but then when they move on in
their life they are talked about as if nobody really liked them....
And hell, we have [beep]ed up back there also. We know that, but we
have never in our god damn lives not wanted to work with another
wrestler in that locker room because they were not a big enough
star. Sure at one point, we didn't want to do this Dark Carnival
thing. We figured...."What will fighting a singles stable get us"
but you know what we realized, this is not for titles...this is
supposed to be fun and entertaining to the fans of the GCW. We
wrestle here because it is what we love to do. We don't say "Well
we don't want to work with you because the last time we did it...it
was boring." or "You know....nobody realy talks about you in the
online newsletters, so you will get me nowhere."
TK: We have had our differences with many wrestlers in the back.....but
there is not a single god damn wrestler back there that we don't
respect for at least what he does. Because they do exactly what we
do...and this takes talent to do. Things are going to change around
the GCW....and definetly things are going to change in the tag
circuit. We are going to go through team by team...Dirty Pair,
Schizo Inc, Canucks, X-Cops, and boys maybe this right here will
make you think...maybe what we are saying right now will make you
want to kick our asses from here till next year, and you know
what...that's fine. Bring it on. We ain't got no problems getting
our asses kicked, but you can bet yours that we will be dishing out
some of our own ass kickings as well...but before we can do that
there is some business we need to attend to. So that brings us to
our challenge. I want you boys to listen up because this is your
shot at being at this pay-per view event, and you know what if
everybody goes and gets a beer during our match then so be it. You
don't want to work with us...fine stay home. You want to _finish_
the job you started. Well then Dark Carnival you show up on Super
Bowl Night, in Cleveland's Gund Arena....and hell we can make this a
regular match or one of your little extreme matches. Either way it
don't matter to us. We will have ourselves a partner and if for
some reason...whether his plane has a delay or he gets sick...if he
is unable to show up then we will just come to Cleveland alone, and
beat your asses like we should have the first time you messed with
us.
[The High Flyers stand up and walk off camera as the camera fades out.]
[Cuts to the studio ... ]
ME: Interesting clips we just saw there.
JM: Lock up Viktor Karasopolis; that good for nothing GCW "Champion".
ME: Viktor Karasopolis having a rought time with the Youngstown Police
Department, apparently, and later on, we will be hearing from
Brandon Simpson. As you heard, apparently, Brandon Simpson was
taken the hospital to be treated after that encounter.
JM: Yeah, right. That was a precautionary thing.
ME: So now you're on the X-Assassins side all of a sudden?
JM: It's not that I'm on the X-Assassins' side. I'm not on
-Karasopolis'- side.
ME: Well, folks, our first match of the night is going to be between
Kossuth of the Dark Carnival and Johnny "Tap" Ving .. who has been
having some problems with the X-Assassins as of late.
JM: And we saw the Dark Carnival working with the X-Assassins a little
bit last week when they attacked the SHF together, it seemed like.
ME: Take a look.
[The scene is the dark, cold, stank alley behind the Eden Prairie Center
in Eden Prairie, MN. Sphinx arises from a giant green dumpster.]
S: Well, we put the Fallen Angles out of the game.
[Flashes back to when Sphinx and Kossuth destroyed the FA, first with the
powerbomb off the balcony and secondly the powerbomb/spinning legdrop
combo...]
S: Now, Suicidal High Flyers...you are well on your way.
[Flashes back to SuperFights when the Dark Carnival dismembered SHF after
their match with the X-Cops.]
S: But SHF, what I don't get...is that you just ask for more. You
can't just give up and leave like the Fallen Angels did. We put
them out of wrestling...for good. And now, we're gonna put you out
of more than wrestling, my friends. We will destroy you. And then
what...after we destroy the SHF, where does the Dark Carnival go
from there? That seems to be a popular question. But the answer is
not known to anyone else but the ones who need to know. As far as
the rest of you, you will all learn in due time, but you may want to
warn the police, because we're coming.
[Sphinx picks up a folding chair out of the dumpster and throws it at the
camera.]
[When the camera opens up, you see nothing but a black screen. Within a
matter of seconds you see about 2 seconds of that blurry white snow, like
when a channel goes off air at night? Anyway, your taken right back to the
scene of Tuesday Night Superfights, Kain and Stanley are helplessly
handcuffed to the turnbuckles as Kossuth and his closest friend Sphinx are
seen annihilating Tommy Kain and Ken Stanley with brutal chairshot's to the
legs and to quote Mark Warren "Damn near ending their walking career's."
The last bit of footage seen is the GCW security officers pushing The Dark
Carnival back to the lockers rooms.]
[As the camera opens once again, it's just starting to get dusk, the sun as
set and the last few moments of day are upon us. We see buildings off all
sorts, all of them are shut down, boarded up, burnt, or collapsed to the
ground. It kinda looks like the setting of the western scene in "Bill and
Ted's Excellent Adventure". But anyway, this is a town where the
population ranks at a big fwapping ....In other words, this is a "Ghost
Town"]
[Within the distance 4 bright pinpoints of light can be seen in the istance
accompanied by the sound of what sounds like the humming of a car's engine.
In about 4 seconds the lights seem to get closer and the sounds are louder
we are treated with the sight of a a brand new, sleak, silver Nissan 300ZX.
The car breaks into a full skid and spin's around 360 degrees, the driver
side suicide door open we finally get a image of who the driver was. It's
none other than "The Child of Fire Kossuth. Kossuth is dressed in a pair
of white jeans and he's wearing only a black leather jacket that's unzipped
to the middle of his chest showing off his awesome physique. His dirty-
blond hair is soaking wet as always and tied up in a pony tail (a la Rob
Van Dam). He removes his Oakley's and tosses them into the driver seat
then reaches over the seat looking for something. When his hand come out
from the backseat he withdraws a aluminum baseball bat wrapped with bloody
barb wire. He kicks the door shut and then looks off into the faint
sunset]
K: Ahhhh, these are the places that scream my name. A lost and
forgotten town cries out, and only to be answered by a once lost and
forgotten soul. It is a place like this that I can find peace and
security, away fromthe society of the unkind, the society that
doesn't care for each other, they lie, kill, steal and for what
reason? Personal gain.
[Kossuth, walks away from his car and into the town, the sound of wolves
howling can be heard in the distance, as Kossuth takes a step and walks
upon the rotted and broken down porch of a old bar.]
K: Tuesday night, we did a little _factoring_ of our own. In our
equasion we started with two, then we took two away.
[Suddenly the image from Superfights reappears again where Kossuth and
Sphinx obliterated the Flyers with chairs.]
K: Kain, Stanley, we then came up with the answer to what you are and
what your futures hold. _NOTHING_. You two idiots, are nothing,
your career's will never amount to nothing. You see, you picked the
wild card out of the deck and it brought nothing but pain, torment
and anguish upon you. How many times have Sphinx and I humiliated
you, and yet you have to realize that we are your superiors and that
we pull your strings just like Warren did when I was his puppet.
We've put you through tables, hit you with chairs, bats, and Hell
only know's what else. But you've always risen again and came back
for more and this final time we beat you just like the country hick
beats his red-headed step child. I'll make the final judgement now,
the final chapter of the story begins. January 31, at Season's
Beatings. Suicidal High Flyers, Sphinx and I challenge you to a:
No Countout, No Disqualification, No Pinfall, No Submission,
HARDCORE DEATH MATCH. The winner is determined when both team
members are knocked unconscious and can not continue the match.
The challenge has been set, to accept such a fatal and possible
career ending match on your part Flyers is nothing
but...................................SUICIDE.
[Kossuth walks into the bar, this place is nothing but wreckage. The
tables and chairs are wood-rotten and the bar itself has seen many years of
corrosion, the windows are broken and the steps are in such bad shape that
access to the upper rooms is impossible. Kossuth slides against the dark
wall on the other side of the room and slides down his the floor chuckling
and holding his bat close to him]
K: I just also got notice of some little "Preview" show I'm supposed to
be appearing at. They put me up against some lunatic, Heroine using
freak,Johnny Ving? Then they have the audacity to tell me that this
won't be under "Hardcore Rules?" Fine, so be it, I'll tone down my
style for one night, but Ving you're gonna get first hand view of
what "Total Offense" means. You got a bigger challenge and you
realize and you better be on your guard or else I might just "TAP"
your head with a few chair shots........Kain, Stanley don't make
your presense known that night because if you try to get that spark
of courage and try to get some redemption, remember that when you
play with fire, YOU GET BURNT, and you found that out the first
time. Ving, I'll see you in a week.
[Kossuth chuckles to himself as the camera closes to a black screen
revealing
| | Too Much Evil | |
| | For One Hand! | |
| |_ _ _ _ _ _| |
| | | | | | | | | |
|^ ^ ^ ^|\ /|^ ^ ^ ^|
| / \ |
\ / \ /
| | | |
[Instantly the " logo and catch phrase" of Johnny "Tap" Ving erupts in fire
and burns away as the words "I DON'T THINK SO" appear in bright blood red
letters that are on fire themselves.]
[Cuts back to the studio ... ]
JM: Hrm.
ME: Well, fans, apparently Kossuth has challenged the Suicidal High
Flyers to a Hardcore Death Match of some sorts.
JM: Is it me, or do Kossuth and Ethan Zane Street not get along?
ME: I think it's you, Mickey J. Let's take a look at Johnny Ving's
response.
_ _
| | Too Much Evil | |
| | For One Hand! | |
| |_ _ _ _ _ _| |
| | | | | | | | | |
|^ ^ ^ ^|\ /|^ ^ ^ ^|
| / \ |
\ / \ /
| | | |
[Those of you who have seen the movie "Sandman" might remember this bleak
urban ghetto, downtown Chicago. In reality, the place is called Cabrini
Green, basically a bunch of rusted out projects sticking out of a pile of
dirt in one of the many ass-ends of Chicago, just north of the skyscrapers.
When the sun goes down, all stops. The place looks like a post-apocalyptic
grave yard, for the kids using the matresses piled up in front of the place
are gone, holed up inside in relative safety.]
[In other words, not really the kinda place you wanna be at 11:30pm at
night. Nonetheless, intrepid GCW reporter John Boyd is just a block away and around the
corner from this place. Wow. I was impressed when he went
balls to balls with Simpson, but this is TRULY a test of his mettle. John
stands in a relatively secluded, but oddly busy stretch of road, tucked
between some jet black warehouses, no doubt painted with years of sediment
from the nearby railyards. Boyd and his reporter look like two fishes out
of water, yet here they wait. What on Earth for is completely beyond me.]
JB: Cripes. It's damn near 11:30... he said he'd be here at 11... I have
better things to be doing than sitting out here in the cold when I
could be in my hotel getting a nice night's sleep.
CG: Yeah, same here. Hey, what say we give him another 15 minutes, then
we get the hell out of here.
[-Ed Note: CG = Camera Guy]
JB: Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of FIVE.
CG: Works for me.
[A pan around the place reveals a whole lotta leather. Goff types in
Dracula capes mope about, smoking cloves, while two bouncers, big beefy
bikers from hell, stand either side of a rusty, twisted Victorian Gate,
checking the id's of the people venturing through. A guy walks by Boyd and
the Camera Guy, damn near knocking the both of them over.]
JB: Hey, watch where you're going! That's some expensive equipment over
there.
[The guy turns around, a gutter punk looking scrub.]
GUY: You gotta problem? Huh?
[Boyd lets out a gulp.]
JB: Uh, never mind.
GUY: What the [BEEP], man? I come here, and ALREADY I have [BEEP]ers like
you tryin' ta act all [BEEP]in' TOUGH & [BEEP]? Whatcha gonna do,
old man?
[Obviously, this guy was looking for a fight... Boyd tries to talk his way
out of it. Until..]
JV: [BEEP] off, Mad Dog. We ain't got time for more of your
[BEEP][BEEP].
MD: But..
JV: Leave. Shoo. Bye.
[The scrub lets out a growl and stomps up to the bouncers, and trounces
right through them, prompting a few censored out words by the bouncers.]
JB: Mad Dog?
JV: Yeah, stupid name, ain't it.
JB: Well, it's unusual. What would possess a guy to name himself Mad
Dog?
JV: Pretty sure it's cuz he can't think of anything better. Here. I'll
get you guys in here and we can talk, kay?
JB: I don't know about that, Tap. The place sounds kind of noisy. Are
you sure that's a good place to try and conduct an interview?
JV: Aw, c'mon, you'll like it. We can unwind, have a few drinks, then I
can tell ya all about the [BEEP] that's been goin' down with me.
How's that sound?
JB: Well, we're on the job, Tap. You know we don't drink.
JV: Oh, c'mon. You can't tell me that you come all the way up here from
FLORIDA, to THIS [BEEP]hole and tell me you're going dry. C'mon.
Drinks are on me. Got paid last week and I have a few bucks to
spare. C'mon.
[Johnny B looks a little apprehensive...]
JV: COME ON. Either follow me in, or ya can go back to Warren with an
empty tape. C'mon, you two look like you need to get out a little
more. Upstairs there are pool tables. It's a bit less noisey up
there. Granted it's no pristine pond in the middle of, I dunno,
Yellowstone Park, but at least we can talk without having to raise
our voices. Come on. You'll like it. It looks a lot better since
they reopenned. All the bullet holes from when the gang bangers shot
the place up are all but gone.
[Boyd offers a pleading look to the camera man. No help there. Then Boyd
shrugs and the camera follows Tap in. They stop at the two bouncers. They
shake hands and give a quick hug / pat each other on the back thing, and Tap mutters
something in their ears about his two companions. They nod and
wave the three of them through. The camera follows Tap & Boyd into a small
alley way, up a sidewalk, and to the left into the building proper. The
noise that had been bleeding from the inside gets steadily louder and
louder until, finally, the door closes behind you, and guess what: total
darkness.]
JV: Come on. Stay close.
[Some shuffling, and around a corner you go, and you're in a longer hall
way. Tap walks right past two lipstick lesbians dry-screwing along a wall,
bathed in UV light. The camera guy seems transfixed on these two, and as he
walks by, that camera keeps trained on the two, until finally, they get out
of each other's faces long enough to stick their fingers up and.. the
camera quickly snaps back to Boyd and Tap walking into a slightly more well
lit, and more open space.]
[The space opens up around the corner to the left, and as you enter it, and
pan around the place, you are in what is referred to semi amicably as "an
Industrial Club" in other words, a lotta KMFDM / Ministry / Front 242 /
RevCo blasting out of the speakers, and various post-modern sculptures,
usually mixed media comprised of scrap metal and skeletal parts. Tap walks
up to the bar, slips him a bill in exchange for a few coctails, turns
around, and nods his head in the direction of a steel staircase as if to
beckon Boyd and the Camera guy to follow.]
JB: What IS this place..
[Tap leads the two up the staircase, past some more people making out, to
the top of the stairs and through some doors. There, on the second floor of
the place, it's more well lit still, a bit less crowded, and there are pool
tables, just like Tap said, God bless 'im. Tap turns around.]
JV: And welcome to the Aftermath, the lousiest excuse of a dance club in
town, but, hell, they make the third best Gin & Tonic in the world
for 3 bucks, so what choice do I have but to come here every chance
I get.
JB: THIRD best?
JV: Yeah, behind well, MY place of course, which makes the best G&T in
existence - a secret recipe..
JB: What's so complicated about a Gin & Tonic? There are three
ingredients in the whole drink.
JV: Well, maybe to the layman it might be that simple, but there is an
art to it. Subtle, yes, almost sublime, but it is an art
nonetheless.
JB: You speak of making a stiffy as if it were painting in oils.
JV: Well, in many ways it is, but we won't get into that. The second
best G&T in the world is in Minneapolis, at a place called the CC
Club. But it's a bit far to drive home when you're tired, and too
far to take the taxi when you're drunk. So, for me to get a great
G&T, it's either hang out at work, or come here. And you can
understand why I would want to get away from work once in a while.
JB: Understandable. Well, speaking of work, you mind if we get going on
this interview? I'm not used to staying up this late.
JV: Really. Hell, this place isn't going to get busy for another half of
an hour.
JB: Well, I'm geting old, Tap. Need my sleep. You want to begin?
JV: Let's have a drink first.
[Tap sets the three drinks he's holding on a nearby pool table, then grabs
two of them, one in each hand, offering them to Boyd and the camera man.]
JB: Tap, sorry, no drinking on the job for me.
JV: C'mon. You gotta try this. See what I mean, ya know?
JB: Tap. No.
JV: C'mon!
JB: NO!
JV: Ah, stop being such a [BEEP] Boyd, and take the drink,. You'll love
it, guaranteed. Best drink on the planet - next to mine and the CC
Club's of course.
JB: Johnny, for the last time, we don't drink on the job, so you might
as well just give up and answer a few questions.
JV: Okay, here's the deal. Either you try this drink, just a sip..
[Tap pauses.]
JV: Or I walk.
[Boyd groans.]
JB: Just one sip?
JV: One Sip. That's all I ask.
[Boyd groans once more.]
JB: Oh boy. Okay, Tap, I'll do it. But just one sip!
JV: Him too.
[The Camera guy's arm reaches out and grabs the drink from Tap's hand. Boyd
looks at the Camera man as if he were a traitor, then reluctantly takes the
drink, and offers one last desparate look to Tap. Tap crosses his arms and
waits.]
[Then Boyd takes a sip.]
[Fast forward one and a half hours. It's now 1AM. The camera is resting on
the table, and Tap and the camera guy are playing a game of pool while Boyd
stand behind the camera guy, trying to coach him on the finer points of
billiards. Boyd's tie is loosenned quite a bit, his blazer is draped on a
chair and his sleeves are rolled up. And he's holding a near empty coctail
glass. He slurps the rest down and clumsily slams the empty glass down on a
nearby table, where it joins over a dozen of its brethren.]
JB: Cmon, man, whut'ssss takinnn ya soo lonnnggg? I gooooot.. pee
here...
[Tap can't help but laugh at the sport. The site of Boyd drunk is about too
much for him to handle.]
JV: [BEEEEEEEP], Meeeee-yan, I'fff seen some ssloppee drunkss b'fer,
but, YOU...HAHA!
JB: Shuuup, yooou! I'ff ssstood up gainst Simps'n!! I ain'ffraif a yew!!
[Boyd stumbles back, and if it weren't for the table making the save, it'd
be ass-plant city, daddio. Tap and the Camera Guy fall over laughing.]
JB: Wwwwwhuzzo fffunnee?
[Tap gets back up, wiping the tears off of his eyes.]
JV: oooh boy.. heyyy weren' we s'posed to be here for somethin..
JB: [BEEP]!! I wis s'posed.. INNERVIEW YEW!!
JV: hey, asssk me a questin then...
[Boyd thinks for a second.]
JB: Uhhh.
[Boyd thinks for another second.]
JB: Thinnnkin'
[Another second..]
JV: C'monnn, mee-yann.
[Another second.. and a few more after that.]
JB: Uh, where'ss th' bathroom?
JV: Down th' stairs an' to tha lefff. Can' missit.
JB: Thanks..
[Suddenly, the camera starts panning very quickly and very clumsily away..]
CG: Hhhhey.. someone'sss sstealin' our camera!!
JV: COOOL!!
JB: Whut?
JV: BYE CAMERA!! HAHHAAHAHA!!
[And they all fall over laughing.]
[Cut to:]
[WILL John Boyd and the camera guy recover their camera? WILL the three of
them recover from their hangovers the next morning? WAS there a point to
any of this? Find out on the next FROM THE CORE!!]
[ 2 M E 4 1 H ]
[Cuts in to the arena ... ]
GCW presents
--------------------------------------------
| T a l e o f t h e T a p e |
--------------------------------------------
Kossuth -vs- Johnny "Tap" Ving
___________________________________
\ Koss \ \ Tap \
\-------\------------------\-------\
|__210__|______Weight______|__255__|
|__6'2"_|______Height______|__6'0"_|
|__24___|_______Age________|__31___|
|__3____|____Experience____|__2____|
/-------/------------------/-------/
WRITTEN BY: Brandon Simpson
EDITED BY: Mark Warren
["Knuckle Souffle" kicks in, and Johnny "Tap" enters through the doors,
walking out, calm, collected, a smart allecky smirk on his face. He walks
a bit, surveys the crowd, nods his head, takes a drag from his smoke, and
then raises his hands above his head, fists together, knuckles facing
back, and extend his pinkies straight up like devils horns. The crowd
yells, "TOO MUCH EVIL FOR ONE HAND!!!" as he makes his way to the ring.
He wears full length black trunks, elbow pads, and fingerless black gloves.
Up and down his chest, back and arms is a vast tapestry of all sorts of
tattoos and what not. To top it off, he has his black steel toed Doc
Martens.]
[Getting a thrust kick to the head by those babies is not a pretty sight.
On the right and left sides of his tights are the letters "2 M E 4 1 H"
(too much evil for one hand).]
[Tap gets in the ring and asks ring announcer Richard Anderson for a mic.
The crowd is still popping as he gets ready to speak.]
JV: Hey, kids!
[Crowd pops!]
JV: Actually, this is my first time in Pittsburgh since... uh, my last
time in Pittsburgh, but check this out. I wanna show you something.
Here, Ritchie come here and hold this for me.
SF: OH GOD! Put that thing away! Don't pull _anything_ out for
"Ritchie" to hold!
["Ritchie" Anderson walks over. Tap shoves his drink and the mic in his
hand, telling him to hold the mic up so he can speak.]
JV: Kay, well, ya got this...
[Tap raises his forearms making the all to familiar sign of the X-
Assassins. His response is less than cordial.]
JV: Whattaya think about them apples?
[BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!]
JV: So, I want you all to tell me something. Are you here for this?
[Tap holds up that X-A sign.]
[BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!]
JV: Or are ya here for this?
[Tap keeps the forarms up, sliding them in so that the elbows meet, making
a big olą V.]
[YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!]
SF: Hey, some of the fans are here for Tap Virgin...
MH: .........
JV: Thought so. But I ain't gonna press the point, cuz damned if Iąm
gonna be another hosebag leeching on to the XA to try and scoop up
some glory. But I thought that was cool. I came up with it a few
nights ago on an all night coffee bender. Ya see, I had a bit too
much to drink, and I had to drive home, so I figured, hey, I'll
have some coffee, hoping the coffee would, I dunno, bring me up from
the pit of incoherence that the liquor had sunk me into. What I
found out, tho was that coffee doesnąt really bring you back. Itąs
more like it takes you off somewhere to the side. Very weird. At any
rate, I wound up having to crash at the place, but since I was so
wired, I wound up staring at the ceiling for SIX FREAKING HOURS!!
SIX FREAKING HOURS!!
[Tap takes the mic and the drink back and walks around a bit.]
SF: Stupid drunk. What kind of role model drinks and drives? Hey, Tap,
want a Joseweiser? It has to beat whatever that crap you're
drinking is. He can't even do an interview or wrestle a match
without drinking. He needs a AA meeting... not a match.
JV: Speaking of the XA, have you guys noticed anything, well, peculiar
about my matches with them?
[A mised reaction from the crowd.]
SF: Yeah, you lose! HAHAHA!
MH: Simon, please... have some respect. Let the man speak his piece.
You've got all night to respond.
JV: Well, Iąll clue you all in. See here, by my records, Iąve had one,
two..three.. FIVE matches, and so far, weąre dealing with a ONE
HUNDRED PERCENT SCREWJOB RATE with theses BASTARDS!!
JV: I mean christ on a stick, man, enough is enough. Now, Iąm an easy
going guy. I'm here to get paid, and to get paid means I gotta
offer something in return, but let me tell you all one thing. And
that is that I am getting SICK AND TIRED of people sticking their
GODDAMNED NOSES in MY FRIGGIN' BUSINESS. This is to all of you
upstart little paddywankers out there, especially you, Kossuth and
your Dark Carnies. I don't know who you are, I donąt CARE who you
are, but be sure of one thing. The next person who sticks their fat
ugly nose in MY business is gonna find it ripped off, shoved up
their ASS, and I'll see to it that the rest of Śem are carted out on
the meat wagon. GOT IT?
[Big pop!]
JV: Okay, thatąs all I hafta say. Just a few things I had to get off my
chest. I would said them when Boydie was sąposed to interview me,
but, damn, how was I sąposed ta know he was get smashed so quick?
Cripes, the guy has the intestincal fortitude of a GCW Referee..
well, anyway, hey Kossuth, get your barbecue keister out here. Time
to earn your meal ticket.
[With that, Tap hands the mic back to Richard Anderson and heads over to
his corner.]
["Flames of Judgement" playes as he appears in the entranceway. He comes
to the ring in a black robe kind of like a monk robe. There's a hood over
his head and the robe has a white X on his back that appears to be on fire.
He walks with his head to the floor and two white glowing lights shine from
inside his hood and those are his glowing eyes. He wears a black pair of
padded martial artist pants with streaks and lashes of fire on his left
leg. His body is well tanned and well oiled. He gets into the ring,
getting some heel heat as he backs into his own corner and disrobes,
waiting for the bell.]
[DING DING DING]
[Kossuth charges the man as the match starts, but...]
[!!!!!!]
MH: MY GOODNESS! Kossuth charged the man there, and Ving just blasted
his head into the upper section of the arena, swinging around with
that double axe handle! And Ving on top of the man already!
SF: "Gay."
MH: Ving locking on a camel clutch... Peter, does Ving have that chain
in his hands?
PG: He has a chain in his hands and on the throat of Kossuth, holding
that camel clutch on with a chain around the neck!
MH: Referee Richard de Rosa doesn't see it, folks...
SF: Of course he won't see Tap cheating... these crooked refs see what
they want to see and ignore what they want to ignore. But you know,
there's a strange rumor floating around the locker room about Tap.
PG: Oh? I haven't heard anything.
SF: Sure. There's a rumor he's going to do some ballet dancing during
this match.
MH: What?
PG: What are you talking about?
SF: And there's another rumor he's going to get so drunk that he'll pee
his pants and leave the ring just to get out of fighting Kossuth.
MH: Are you off your rocker?
PG: Have you lost your mind?
MH: Ving putting the chain away quickly... he has choked Kossuth out
here. Ving just stomping on Kossuth now.
[Ving stomps him about six or seven times, and then gives his now famous
"2ME41H" sign, at which the crowd gives the usual reply.]
MH: Ving getting stronger and stronger crowd reactions every week. He's
bringing the man to his feet... looks like he's going for a power
bomb... but Kossuth powers him over! Kossuth backdropping the man,
and now Kossuth recovering in the corner from that camel clutch...
Ving back to his feet quickly... runs to the corner... Kossuth
raises a boot right to the face of Ving!
PG: An unusual mistake coming from Ving, Michael.
MH: Kossuth hooking him now... hoists the bigger man up... brainbuster!
Nice show of power by the lightweight Kossuth!
PG: Snapped him onto his head with force with that brainbuster suplex!
MH: Fireman's carry pickup by Kossuth... DROPS HIM WITH A DVD! Slammed
his head to the mat out of the fireman's carry! And Kossuth locking
on a version of the figure four leglock here, Peter.
PG: Kossuth has a vast array of moves, Michael, there's no question.
SF: I've had more fun at a dentist's office. I wish the rest of the
Dark Carnival would just come out here and beat hell out of Ving and
put him out of his misery.
MH: Ving made it to the ropes, and Kossuth with a clean break, and
Kossuth up immediately stomping on the leg of Ving. Kossuth showing
a lot of offense here.
[The crowd boos Kossuth as he stomps Ving.]
MH: And the crowd letting Kossuth know what they think of him. Kossuth
helping Ving to his feet... and Kossuth with a shot to the neck!
Just a blunt shot with the hand, like a poke... right into the
Adam's apple. Kossuth backs him up and sends him to the ropes...
attempted lariat ducked by Ving... Ving bounces back... THRUST KICK!
Took his head off! And the crowd loving it, ladies and gentlemen...
Ving grabs him... Fireman's carry of his own... gutbuster! Dropped
him on his stomach!
[Ving holds onto the waistlock.]
MH: Ving holding on... OH MY! Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker! MY GOODNESS!
And he hooks the leg!
1...
2...
MH: No dice. Kossuth kicks out... it's going to take more than that to
put it away.
SF: Probably not much more.
MH: Ving with a standing wristlock...
[Ving hooks his hand under the armpit of Kossuth and pushes him towards and
through the ropes!]
MH: MY GOODNESS!
PG: He just shoved him right through the ropes and Kossuth hit the
railing!
MH: Ving following him outside... you'd think Kossuth would generally
have the advantage when it spills outside. Ving scoops him up... OH
MY! He dropped him, facefirst, onto the ring apron!
SF: That's a quick nose job for you. That's what Cronata's going to get
tonight on that "perfect" nose of his.
MH: Cronata to team with new-found "friend" Chris Michaels to take on
the team of Dan Devine and "The Punisher" Brandon Simpson... we will
hear from Simpson here tonight.
PG: What's new?
SF: Thank goodness someone worth watching will be out here.
MH: Ving tossing Kossuth back into the ring after some punishment on the
outside. And Ving a little slow getting back in... he's back on the
apron...
[!!!!!!!!!!]
PG: Kossuth just speared into him... dove into him and knocked him from
the apron to the railing!
MH: That left Ving staggering!
SF: Hmm... normal behavior for him. You know, I heard Ving's
blood/alcohol level stays at 50/50.
[!!!!!!!!!!]
MH: SUICIDE DIVE! Kossuth with that suicide dive, driving Ving back
into the railing, and you've got to think that Ving is thinking,
"Hey, I wish this had never gone outside the ring!"
SF: No... Ving's probably thinking, "I wish I had a drink."
PG: I think we're overlooking Ving's brawling skills here... don't sell
him short at all, guys... Ving's been in a few fights in his time.
SF: Lover's quarrels with you don't count, Peter.
MH: Kossuth slams the head into the apron before tossing Ving back into
the ring. Kossuth on the apron, and he's looking for some support
from the crowd, but none there. Kossuth slingshots into the ring
and drops a leg across the back of Ving's head, and he rolls him
over for the cover!
1...
2...
MH: Ving kicks out of it... a lot of fight still left in this man. Ving
getting to his feet... Kossuth whips to the corner, but it's
reversed by Ving... AND VING JUST SHOT HIM IN THERE! Kossuth
staggers out and is met with a clothesline to the back of the head!
Where did Ving get this burst of energy?
SF: Probably thinking about getting out of here and going to get a
drink. That's inspiration for him.
MH: Ving picking him up... slinging him back to the corner... and Ving
unloading with lefts and rights on Kossuth!
[Ving winds up...]
PG: OH WHAT A SHOT! I think Kossuth lost a tooth!
MH: Kossuth staggering out of the corner and falling on his face! Ving
picking him up...
PG: He's tying him up in the ropes in the corner... upside down!
MH: You're right...
SF: Ving about to try some kinky stuff here, ladies and gentlemen...
MH: No he's not... BASEBALL SLIDE DROP KICK! Kossuth's face taking a
lot of punishment tonight!
SF: I'm sure it gives just as much as it takes.
MH: And it looks like Ving's going for the VX!
SF: Thank GOD! End it! End it now!
[Ving is, indeed, attempting his DDT into an inverted buzzkiller type
submission hold.]
MH: VX! It's the VX!
[The crowd is popping up hell. The pop is so loud, you'd think a couple of
those females in the front row would want to give Ving oral sex or
something. Maybe even a couple of the questionable males. I mean, this
guy... this guy is popular, dammit.]
[BTW... Kossuth tapped.]
[DING DING DING!]
MH: Kossuth submits to the VK! Ladies and gentlemen, Johnny "Tap" Ving
wins another one!
SF: You mean, he "finally" wins!
MH: [to Peter] Ving's VX... one of the most devastating moves in our
sport, Mike.
PG: Hmm? Mike?
MH: I'm sorry... I'm Mike. Michael that is. You're Peter. Oh, I don't
know what's wrong with me.
SF: You've been "tapping" into Tap's cough medicine, huh, Hawkins? You
stinking drunk...
MH: Fans, Tap Ving your winner, and an impressive victory here tonight.
[Pulls out of the arena and to commercials]
****COMMERCIALS************************************************************
Hey you! Yeah you! If you're going to join one fed this year... join GCW.
=\ But if you have enough time for a second one... JOIN THE WORLD-WIDE
WRESTLING ASSOCIATION! It's easy! Just contact Dave Hamrick (risk...@aol.com,
worldwi...@hotmail.com, Kenny_Brucerock on StarChat - IRC, Bruceberg on the Undernet -
IRC or 27192969 on ICQ). Trust me...
there's not many feds that can top GCW... and this is no exception. Doh!
But it comes damn close... JOIN TODAY!
************************************************************COMMERCIALS****
[Camera opens up to Toronto, where the Dirty Pair, "Dirty" 'Dre Tucker and
"Jackhammer" Jesse Joson are walking down the sidewalk while the camera
follows.]
DT: Well, whaddaya think we should do for the pay per view?
JJ: I dunno, anything that includes ass-kicking in it. We've been quiet
for too long.
DT: I'm pretty sure we'll be doin' some of that come the PPV. I meant,
what are we gonna do about our competetion in GCW?
JJ: I ain't worried. We'll kick all their asses up and down this fed...
just give it some time. We're gonna have to get noticed first.
Some people seem to have forgotten we're here in this fed.
DT: I still got some fans.
JJ: Screw 'em. I'm talking about the wrestlers. They're the ones you
gotta face in the ring, doof.
DT: <shrugs> They'll get theirs too. But we just can't tell everyone
what we'll do right now...
JJ: 'Cause that'd spoil all the fun. So get out of our face camera
dude, we're on a mission.
[Andre and Jesse turn into the old gym that they always work out in,
cutting the interview short. Fade out.]
ME: The Dirty Pair, Jim, definitely a team to watch out for.
JM: For what? To see if they are actually alive or if those were taped
last year?
ME: We have't seen the Dirty Pair in action for quite a while. You're
right ... but we WILL see them in action at Season's Beatings!
JM: Hrm?
ME: I've just received word, during the commercial break, that a match
has been made for the GCW World Tag Team Titles!
JM: X-Cops against the Dirty Pair? Damn, they really are struggling.
ME: No! Not just those two teams ... it'll be The X-Cops against the
Crazy Canucks, Schizophrenia Inc., -and- the Dirty Pair in a Four
Way Elimination Dance for the titles!
JM: Only in the GCW.
ME: That's the spirit!
JM: I was going to say ... only in GCW can you fit the whole division
into one match.
ME: Well, we've still got some sort of match between the Suicidal High
Flyers and the Dark Carnival.
JM: "Oh .. yeah"
ME: Let's go to some comments from another faction which isn't exactly
seen together a whole lot, but they do exist folks! The Crazy
Canucks and their leader, Matt Kamakazee.
[The scene opens in front of a modest looking house, sometime around 4pm.
There is about a meter of snow on the ground, which is quite a bit,
approximately a little over three feet for you Americans out there that
don't know the metric system. The camera man looks around for a way to get
from the sidewalk to the front porch, but the path isn't shovelled, and the
camera man isn't prepared to climb over the snow to get there. A noise can
soon be heard, and a snow machine drives up to where the camera man is
standing. Before he takes off his helmet, you can tell who it is by the
little stuffed beaver sitting in a basket in front of the handle bars. The
man does take off his helmet, revealing a mask with maple leaves on it, and
'EH!'. That's right, folks, it's Canuckle-Head.]
CH: Bonjour, eh. Hop right on, Mr. Camera guy, and I will take you to
the back where me and my bro'der are, eh.
[The camera man climbs up on the snowmobile, but Canuckle-Head starts
driving away before he's ready, making the camera man fall off. Canuckle-
Head stops.]
CH: Oops, sorry, eh.
[The camera man gets back on, making sure to hold onto the grab bar. They
then drive to the backyard, where the snow is all packed down solid. Both
men get off the snow machine, with Canuckle-Head carefully lifting up
Beaver, and carrying him over to where Cap'n Canuck is sitting. Both men
are wearing snow pants that resemble their tights, Team Canada jackets, red
boots and gloves, along with their masks. Canuckle-Head stops to put
Beaver down in a little pen that also has Moose in it, and he sits down
beside Cap'n.]
CC: I suppose you all are wondering why exactly we attacked those evil
X-Cops on Aftermath, after we easily took care of those two weirdos,
eh. Well, I know you all saw what the sinister X-Assassins did to
our great hero, Matt "he should be TV champ, dammit" Kamakazee, on
Aftermath a couple of weeks ago, and how he was almost killed after
their deadly attack, eh.
CH: He almost had his head knocked off, eh?
CC: Yeah, eh. And we decided that it was about darn time we went out
and showed that nobody, and we do mean nobody, attacks our great
leader without there being a little bit of revenge, right Canadien
brother, eh?
CH: You know it, eh. Our first goal was to attack the diabolic X-Cops,
de team we were brought here to defeat, and de team who is making a
disgrace of de GeeSeeDubYou tag team division, and dat is exactly
what we did, eh.
CC: That's right, eh. And you know why we picked them first, eh?
CH: Tell 'em, eh.
CC: We picked them first because we are the X-Cops Defeaters, the most
successful team every to come out of the Great White North, and the
by god best thing to ever happen that GCW since they signed Matt
"what's in a name" Kamakazee, eh. We should be the GCW tag team
champions, but the evil X-Cops have cheated time and time again, eh.
We want another shot, eh, we Season's Beatings, eh, and we will get
it, eh.
CH: Did you just say, 'by god', eh?
CC: Well, yes, I think so, eh.
CH: Doesn't de X-Cops' evil leader, Brandon Simpson usually say
somet'ing like dat, eh?
CC: I don't know, does he, eh?
CH: He does, eh.
CC: Oh, well I retract everthing with the words 'by' or 'god' in them,
eh. Besides, our catch phrase is so much more original than that
mumbo jumbo, eh.
CH: You bet, eh.
CC: Hey, look at that, eh!
[Cap'n points over at Beaver, and there's a brick behind it.]
CC: HA, EH! Your stupid Beaver just pooped a brick, eh!
CH: What the heck, eh. Dat might explain why he hasn't been feeling all
dat well as of late, eh.
CC: Hehe, eh. Yeah, I thought he was feeling a little heavy when I hit
that crazy guy with him on Aftermath, eh.
CH: Wait...you used my Beaver to hit day crazy guy, eh?
CC: Yeah, eh. And I stuff that brick up it's bum...er, no wonder it
knocked him out, eh.
[Canuckle-Head rushes over to Beaver, and he lifts him up.]
CH: HOW DARE YOU, EH! You hurt my poor little Beaver, in a jealous ploy
to try and get your Moose over as the favourite animal in
GeeSeeDubYou, eh!
CC: Ahh, you're making this all up, eh. I didn't nothing wrong, eh.
CH: I know you did, eh. Why don't we settle dis once and for all, eh?
CC: You don't mean...eh...
CH: You're damn right, eh. An internet poll, eh. We'll poll up to the
From De Core after Season's Beatings, and we'll find out once and
for all who is de greatest mascot of dis team, eh.
CC: It's a deal, eh. But what is the addy, eh?
CH: canuc...@hotmail.com, eh.
CC: Yeah, okay, eh. And they vote by stating which one is better in the
topic, eh?
CH: Dat's right, eh.
[The two men look at eachother, and nod.]
CH: Dere is only on ting left, eh.
CC: That's right, eh. If you are not down with that, we've got three
words for you, eh...
BOTH: VIVA CANADA, EH!
[The two men stare at eachother, and the screen fades to black.]
[We find ourselves in the backseat of a car. As the camera pans around, in
the passenger's seat is Matt "Read My Hips: Not Gonna Do It" Kamakazee. In
the driver's seat is....Matt's Mom. Playing on the radio is some nice
Barry Manilow.]
MK: Hey all you out there in television land. You know...this wasn't my
idea...mom seems to be set on going somewhere...not sure where
though. She won't tell me. I dunno what her damn problem is.
Lemme see if she'll tell me. Mooooooooooom! Where are we going?
MM: You'll see when we get there.
MK: Dammit, woman! Tell me!
[Matt's Mom looks over at Matt.]
MM: ...
MK: Dammit, woman! Watch the road!
[Matt's Mom looks back at the road.]
MM: If you must know...we're going to your friend's house to get your
Godzilla back.
MK: ........
MM: Why do your friends have to live so far away? Now...what is this
Maze boy's address exactly?
MK: Why are we going there!?
MM: To get your Godzilla back.
MK: Dammit, woman! He doesn't have it!!
MM: What in the...good god! Damn kids! Why are you fighting over one
Godzilla toy?! You could have given them one of the thirty six I
gave you for Christmas...
MK: But I burned them..err...they caught on fire.
MM: And you ruined our Christmas Tree too. Damn kids.
MK: You think I meant for them to catch on fire!?
MM: I'm not stupid son...but who has your toy now?
MK: What toy?
MM: Jesus...your Godzilla "friend" or whatever you call it.
MK: That Johnson guy.
MM: What the!? He stole it again!?
MK: Yeah.
MM: Sunuva.
MK: Hey...I didn't start this!
MM: Yeah...I'm real sure. You've always been a trouble maker. Why
couldn't you just be more like your brother?
MK: ....
MM: You never hear about him getting into trouble, do you?
MK: I have a brother?
MM: Of course!
MK: Was I just not informed of this!?
MM: You need to have your head examined! You don't remember your
brother, Dave?
MK: Dave........
MM: He was such a good boy...always cooking our meals for us...
[Matt raises an eyebrow...not a people's eyebrow or a corporate eyebrow.
Just an eyebrow.]
MM: Last I heard....he had settled down and had a baby girl...Wendy or
something like that. It's been so long since I heard from him.
MK: ................
MM: Now...where does this Johnson boy live?
MK: I'm not sure.
MM: Then how could he have taken him!?!
MK: I was wrestling with...
MM: God dammit, boy! You were wrestling again!? HOW MANY TIMES HAVE
I TOLD YOU WHAT I THINK ABOUT HORSEPLAY LIKE THAT!?
MK: Dammit, woman!
[Matt's Mom reaches over and backhands Matt.]
MK: Dammit!
[There's another.]
MK: Dag gone!
[That's another!]
MK: What in the?! I said dag gone! I didn't say damn!
[Whap! Yup. He got another one.]
MK: Stop hitting me already! Don't worry about getting him back! I'll
get him! At the Pay-Per-View...
MM: You're not going to pay to get him back! It's a damn toy!
MK: It's my friend...anyways...me, Maze and Johnson....are gonna
wres....um....play Rock, Scissors, Paper to see who gets it! Don't
worry! It'll be all fun and games!
MM: Well....you better hope you get him back. I'm not spending much
longer with you crying about some stupid toy.
MK: Friend.
MM: What ever the hell you call it!
MK: Can we go home then?
MM: Fine...I drive all the way out here and now you wanna go home. Damn
kids...who ever invented you, outta be shot.
MK: ......
[fades to...]
Matt Kamakazee
You Just Should
Wouldn't You?
He's Very Quite Myopic
Lay Off My Shoes!
The Golden Girls Are Hot
Try Beating Me in Chutes and Ladders
Thank You For Being a Friend
I Am Gettin' Rather Jiggy Wit It
SCORE!
He's Just a Big Dumb Animal Folks
*SNAP*
How Does All This Fit On Here?
Oh Yeah! That's What I'm Talkin' About!
Where For Art Thou Godzilla?
Dammit, Woman!
DOOOOOOO DOOOOOOO DOOOOOO *BOOM*
Damn kids
[fades]
[Cuts back to the studio ... ]
ME: Well, that's definitely going to be a big match as Matt Kamakazee,
Big Bubba Johnson, and Joseph Maze battle it out in a ONE FALL ONLY
triangle match with Godzilla raised above the ring on a pole.
JM: Is that just a flat-out stupid match or what? Maze is going to take
this thing and go back to getting that lizard drunk every night.
ME: Fans, I'm told that we're going to go to the arena now ...
[Cuts down to the arena.]
JB: Fans, my next "guest"... I don't even want to talk to this guy. But
we're in a public place, lots of people around, and he can't hurt
me. I'll never go to his house again, though. Ladies and
gentlemen... he is the number one contender to the GCW World
Heavyweight Title... "The Punisher" Brandon Simpson!
[Audible Rebirth's "Say Your Prayers" fills the ears of each and every fan
in the arena as Brandon "by god, I am the Punisher" Simpson, heads to the
ring. He's wearing the usual: blue jeans, XA sunglasses, black XA shirt
with bleeding red letters... you get the idea. Funny thing, though. He's
carrying something to the ring with him.]
SF: What's that in Simpson's hands?
PG: I think it's... Nilla Wafers?
SF: You're right... what in hell is he doing with Nilla Wafers?
[He's eating them on the way to the ring, Simon.]
SF: Wait... he's eating them on the way to the ring.
[DUH!]
MH: I guess that's his pre-match diet food.
PG: No, that would be hog jowls and cow intestines.
[Hawkins and Gyves burst out laughing.]
SF: You guys are easily amused, aren't you? I don't think you'd be
doing that if he were over here. No, you'd be pissing your pants.
[Did I mention the heat was ON! Simpson's getting booed like there's no
tomorrow as he gets in the ring and extends his hand to John Boyd, who, of
course, is not going to take it. In fact, three security guards, rather
large men, have come to ringside apparently at Boyd's request.]
BS: Boyd... you think these neanderthals can save you from the BGP? The
by god Punisher? What makes you think I'm going to do anything to
you anyway?
JB: Oh... a little thing called... EXPERIENCE.
BS: Johnny boy... buddy pal... you know that things change like the
weather in this business. I mean, before, I wouldn't be out here,
standing side by side with you... I'd be kicking your ass, Johnny...
just 'cause I can. But I got bigger fish to fry, Johnny... you see,
now that I've destroyed all the competition... the Jordan Thorns,
the John Rajah's, the Matt Kamakazees, the Rakeems, and of course,
we can't forget the Johnny Vings... you know the XA is 3-0 against
him, dontcha? I mean, Ving is getting pretty good at looking up at
the lights. But now that I've destroyed all the competition... now
that I have run those little girls Jordan Thorn and Rakeem clean out
of GCW... Mr. Mark Warren comes to me and says, "You're the man, Big
Pun. You're the man to take GCW into the next millenium." Warren
said, "The power lies with you, Big Pun. You are the man who RULES
all worlds. You are the man who could fill Bill Clinton's shoes.
You are the man who I wish would marry my daughter. You are the man
who can stop Y2K. And you," Warren said, "are the man to end the
TYRANNICAL GCW World Title reign of Viktor Karasopolis."
JB: So you're saying Warren is working with you?
BS: Are you a deaf mute, bitch? Did I say I needed Warren's help? I
said HE CAME TO ME and told me to do what I do best. That's all he
wants, and that's all I have to do... VK... the way I see it your
ass is in the driver's seat of a Ford Pinto on the highway to hell,
and I'm in back of the damn car pushing you. And believe me, VK...
after I get through with you... that's the only kind of PUSHING
you'll ever get, because your damned ass will be a cripple after
Season's Beatings.
JB: Tonight you have one more match before going into Season's
Beatings... you'll be teaming with Dan Devine to take on FORMER XA
member... Angelo Cronata. Is Cronata yet another Benedict Arnold?
BS: ...........
[Simpson's non-reaction causes the restless crowd to start booing him. He
looks to the crowd and flips them off, not helping matters much.]
BS: I've got a new outlook, Johnny Boy. Those in the Family now... they
turn their back on us... then they never were family in the first
place. Just like Tung. He never was XA. Never had the heart to be.
Couldn't even beat Derek Walker, the pathetic bastard. I guess he
can still call himself "Rogers' bitch" and still get some respect
for himself. "Nice." And Cronata? I saved the boy's life... but
he's got some serious problems. I ain't gonna hold it against him.
You've seen him at those psychiatric sessions or whatever that stuff
is... he's f'd in the head, my brother. But Cronata... what you've
got is a problem. You see, every damn f'n time I look across the
ring, I don't see anything except a big, lanky, Greek queer wearing
_MY_ belt! _MY_ belt! And when you step in the ring, you'll wish
you'd never crossed me. I'm a one man gang, Boyd. Losing Cronata,
just like losing Rakeem and VK, is comparable to a dog losing a
flea. You see, the boys backing me now... they matter... all the
trash is out of the XA. We are the ultimate gang, and tonight,
Cronata and Michaels, you will PAY THE PRICE!
JB: Fans, I give you, "The Punisher!"
BS: What? You cutting me short?
JB: Look, Mr. "King of Airtime," we don't have all night. Don't you get
enough time on camera? Security, get in here and remove this
redneck hick!
[The crowd pops... and so does Boyd's nose!]
MH: OH MY GOODNESS! HE JUST PUNCHED BOYD RIGHT IN THE NOSE! MY GOD!
SF: And he's whoopin' up on those security guards!
[Simpson backdrops one over the top rope, only to be grabbed by another. As
he's held, the remaining security guard takes a swing at him. Simpson
ducks, and he clocks his buddy over the top rope. Simpson low blows the
remaining one, and...]
SF: PUNISHMENT!
MH: THE PUNISHMENT ON THE SECURITY GUARD... AND NOW HE'S GOING AFTER
BOYD!
SF: He's going for the Nilla Wafers! What in the world...
[!!!!!!!!!!]
SF: HE'S CRAMMING NILLA WAFERS IN BOYD'S MOUTH!
PG: THIS IS DISGUSTING!
SF: Fans, this segment brought to you by Nabisco, makers of Nilla
Wafers...
MH: I don't believe this...
[Believe it. Boyd's got a mouthfull of Nilla Wafers as Simpson's theme
music starts back up. Simpson looks to the camera one more time and
says...]
BS: Hehe... I think he likes 'em. VK... see you at Season's Beatings.
[Cuts out to commercials.]
****COMMERCIALS************************************************************
Interested in joining a Lucha Libre organization? One in which all the
rules and traditions of Lucha Libre are put into play. Do you know what
a Rudo is? A technico? Well, learn all about it in Campeones Locos del
Lucha Libre, an e-wrestling federation run by Gareth Clark. Interested
individuals should contact Mark Warren (dai...@fwb.gulf.net) for more
information.
************************************************************COMMERCIALS****
[Scene opens in Billy Steele's upscale apartment in downtown Atlanta. The
room is filled with foo, drinks and friends of Steele's. His 55-inch TV
screen is on and everyone is focused on the NFC Championship game between
the Minnesota Vikings and Atlanta Falcons. The room is dead silent except
for...]
TV: Anderson with the kick!! It's up...AND GOOD!!! The Atlanta Falcons
are going to the Super Bowl!!! The Falcons are going to the Super
Bowl!!!
[The room explodes in joy and excitement as Steele's friends and family
jump up & down, hi-five, and hug each other in celebration. Steele stands
up from his seat. He's got on a pair of jeans and a replica Jamal Anderson
Atlanata Falcons jersey. As the celebration continues, Steele walks to a
quiet corner of his home to address the GCW and it's fans.]
BS: They kept sayin' it was a fluke...that the Falcons had no business
being 14-2. Well now, they just beat the so-called best team in
football and they're headed to the big time. Just like me...
I've been in the GCW for a minute now and I've had my ups and downs.
In fact, I'm just comin' out of a bad losing streak. But when BILLY
STEELE breaks out, you better watch your step because all hell is
gonna break loose, I promise you.
Now, I see that I've been matched up against "THE UNLIKELY HERO",
TED BRUCE, for the Season's Beatings special preview show. That's
beautiful. The fans of the GCW get to go into the PPV with a little
taste of the baddest brother to ever grace a ring...none other than
THE SLEDGEHAMMER. BRUCE, somebody must be out to get you, man. It
looks like you've made some enemies in the front office. They
schedule you to face the greatest hero that the GCW has ever known-
DAN DEVINE- at the PPV. And not to give away any secrets, but it
looks ike you've got him pretty pissed off.
And then, they put you against *ME*...the Hammer of the X-
Assassins...the one, true enforcer of X-Assassin law. Well, TED
BRUCE, it's highly "UNLIKELY" that you'll come out of our match in
one piece. Not, that the DEVASTATOR needs it, but I'm gonna soften
you up for Season's Beatings. You've been away for awhile, so it's
my duty as the enforcer to re-educate you on the importance of
bowing down to X-A law.
[Steele raises the "X" above his head a he speaks the last sentence.]
BS: And let me hollar at another one of those GCW suckers for a
minute...I'm gonna say something to our so-called champion VIKTOR
KARASOPOLIS. Y'know, it's becoming more and more obvious that you
recognize the strength, talent and power that I possess. First, you
blindside me, then, you kidnap and assault me in an effort to keep
the enforcer from bringing the fury of X-A law on your head. Next,
just as I'm about to drop a Hammer Blitz on JOHHNY VING'S punk-@$$,
you crack me over the head with a chair.
KARASOPOLIS, it should be apparent that *nothing* you do can keep
the HAMMER OF JUSTICE from dropping down on you. You're a fool, but
you're not stupid, VIK. You recognize BILLY STEELE as the most
lethal threat to your pathetic little title reign and now, you're
doing everything in your power to take me out. No dice, punk. The
HAMMER is going to keep hammering away at all obstacles until it's
just you and me. I'm a patient man and I can take my time. So keep
your eyes open, VIK.
The SLEDGEHAMMER is about crush you and your pathetic GCW cronies
once and for all.
BOW DOWN, you punk-@$$ busters!!!
[Scene fades away]
[Cuts back to the studio ... ]
ME: Billy "The Sledgehammer" Steele is definitely in the house and has
to be one of the top contenders for being rising GCW superstar of
1999.
JM: Well, he's been in and out of the GCW and had a few succesful
streaks here and there.
ME: And tonight folks, he faces this man, Ted Bruce.
[One boot down. One boot to go. Ted slowly laces the second boot,
readying himself for Lord-knows what. The bench he sits on has numerous
used-up towels strewn across it and at one end, a Viktor Karasopolis shirt
is thrown over it - nice placement by the studio people.]
[Ted, however, not the biggest fan of Viktor Karasopolis, pays no mind. As
a matter of face, Ted has truly isolated himself from the rest of Global
Championship Wrestling. Ignored? Rejected? Exiled? Yeah, maybe all of
that. But perhaps it's Ted that doesn't want to be a part of the "in-
crowd" of GCW's good guys.]
[After pulling the final knot on his left boot tight, Ted slams his foot
down, picks up the bottle of water which he had to his side, and looks into
the camera - which he just happened to notice, mind you.]
TB: (caught off guard a bit) "Oh! Ah... Hail to the King, baby. How
the crap did _you_ get in here?"
[Ted's eyes are dark - almost black. His hair is extremely brown, as well
and his bangs are kept just long enough to dangle over his brow just so it
barely dances above his eye. Underneath the hair you can see two thick
eyebrows which furrough themselves as Ted thinks.]
TB: (after taking a sip of his bottle) "I suppose your wanting some
comments out of me? Some sort of answers to my actions? Maybe you
even wanna know why Ted Bruce didn't do but two things in the
Fop/Devine match - jack and squat, Dammit."
[The camera nods up and down.]
TB: "Let me make some things VERY clear here, baby. _Why_ would I need
to make any sort of attack on "The Devastator" or "The Fop"? Does
this make any sense to you, baby - 'cuz I sure don't know why I
would. You want someone who's into that kind of thing?"
[Ted reaches over and grasps the shirt which had been sitting to his side.
He unfolds it so the back-side faces outward. In big letters it reads:]
"DEAL WITH IT!"
[Turning it around to the other side, it reads "Viktor Karasopolis."]
TB: (tossing the shirt to the side) "...call up the Greek-Guy. There
are those that would think that the only anti-hero in a world filled
with anti-heroes would actually sink to the levels of X-Assassins or
old Triumvirate members or maybe even Butler's little group - but
you're wrong, baby; you're wrong. 'Cuz Dammit, when I came out to
that ring a few weeks back and explained to Devine and that kid,
Walker, all that stuff I explained, I made my point clear. The mere
fact that the match was tossed out of the window was an unexpected
and _unlikely_ happening. Ya see: I have that affect on things.
You put Ted Bruce in an odd situation such as that and you get weird
stuff happening, Dammit. Simple as that. Do you need me to explain
in in _sign language_?"
[The camera shakes it's "head no as Ted runs his hand through his dark
air. However, the conditioner he uses prevents any hair to stay off of his
brow, and it quickly whips back into shape (he uses Pert Plus, by the
way).]
TB: "Dan Devine wants to say that my accusations of him being nothing
more than a two-bit, backstabbing, Simpson-loving, X-bearing SHOO-
SHOO mama's boy is nothing but a bunch of pig-crap and
[Sarcasm rules...]
TB: "Uh, duh, that's a capital crime, bro, duh..."
[Ted gets a straight face and almost barks at the camera...]
TB: "...well quite frankly, Frank, Ted Bruce isn't one to lie. You
_were_ the hero. You _were_ the savior. You _were_ that star that
carried the Global Championship wrestling banner and you marched to
a different drum. Truth was your deoderant! Justice was your
aftershave! The American Way was your Goddamned tooth-paste! And
what did you did? What did "The Devastator" do? He lifted it
up..."
[Mockingly raises his hands in the air to mimic someone picking something
up...]
TB: "And he said in his adorable, feminine voice..."
[Ted gets this squeaky voice to poke fun at the way Devine talks..."
TB: (mocking Dan Devine) "Oh... I don't neeeed _this_ anymore..."
[Ted then slams his fists down as if to drop something harshly. Also, he
begins to talk in his deep-ass, Duke-Nukem'ish voice again.]
TB: "And you dropped it! _Where_ did you drop it?!?"
[Ted stands breifly and crotch-chops the camera - it's actually really
weird coming from him. He slowly sits down again.]
TB: "Ya dropped it right in my damn lap. That's right, Dammit. It's
not Dan Devine who is the hero or the savior or any of that anymore.
It's "The Unlikely Hero" Ted Bruce, Dammit. I'm the one who carries
that flag now! I'm the hero, Dammit. Any which way you look at it
Devine - you SOLD YOUR SOUL to a Devil named Simpson. No coming
back for you, Dammit."
[Ted turns his head and sighs.]
TB: (with his head turned) "Season's Beatings is coming up soon, and
that's great, baby. Ho ho ho yourself into an aneurysm - spin that
Damn Dreidle-thing-a-ma-jig 'til ya die - and do the uh... Quanza-
thing-or-whatever - bottom line is, ya better be pout, ya better not
pout, ya better not cry until I let you Dan Devine. Because I
_will_ kick... your... ass... BITCH."
[Ted stands up, high above the camera angle. Only tilting itself up just a
little, Ted is seen from an ant's-eye view.]
TB: (pointing at the camera and looking some Giant) "I hope that's all
ya want, 'cuz that last Damn thing your gettin' out of Ted Bruce is
this -
Hail to the King, baby."
[Fades to black as Ted walks away - swell guy, doncha think?]
T E D B R U C E
"Hail to the King, baby."
[Cuts to the arena ... ]
GCW presents
--------------------------------------------
| T a l e o f t h e T a p e |
--------------------------------------------
Billy "The Sledgehammer" Steele -v- "The Unlikely Hero" Ted Bruce
___________________________________
\ BTSS \ \ Ted \
\-------\------------------\-------\
|__255__|______Weight______|__265__|
|__6'5"_|______Height______|__6'5"_|
|__23___|_______Age________|__31___|
|__1____|____Experience____|__11___|
/-------/------------------/-------/
WRITTEN BY: Dan Gray
EDITED BY: Mark Warren
MH: Hello again, fans, welcome back to our "Countdown to Season's
Beatings '99" Preview show.
PG: This next match should be one heck of a battle! We've got the
self-proclaimed 'enforcer' of the X-Assassins, Billy 'The
Sledgehammer' Steele....
SF: 'Self-proclaimed!?' The BY GOD Punisher dubbed him that, Petey, and
that means its the truth.
PG: Steele will be taking on 'The Unlikely Hero' Ted Bruce, who's recent
return to competition in GCW has really awakened the fans.
SF: Sure has. The mere thought of Ted Bruce gives them all nightmares
and they can't sleep.
PG: Simon, do you think you ever could go through a night without saying
a negative thing about SOMEONE?
SF: Uh ..........no.
PG: Somehow I didn't think so.
SF: Hey, as Ethel Merman put it, "I Just Gotta Be Me!"
PG: .....
MH: .....
SF: What?
PG: You listen to Ethel Merman?
SF: Hell yeah, dat 'ho could lay down some sweeeeet flava with her
pipes.
MH: Well, slap mah fro.
SF: .....
MH: ?
SF: Slap ma fro?
MH: Yeah, jus' a little something I picked up.
SF: Well, well, Mikey's branchin out.
MH: Yeah, all the girls think I'm pretty fly...
SF: For a white guy...
PG: While "Mean Mikey H" and "MC Simon Forte" are rappin up here, lets
go down to Richard Anderson for the ring introductions.
RA: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for ONE
fall. Coming first to ringside....
["Man of Steele" blares to life on the PA system and the crowd boos
lustily. Red pyros burst to life and fire in beat with the hip-hop
rhythm. Billy Steele comes out, wearing an X-Assassins T-shirt (what a
surprise!). He crosses his arms in the famous 'X' above his head before
comeing down to ringside amidst the loud boos. He is wearing long red
wrestling tights, the word 'hammer' patched onto each leg. On his left
shoulder is a picture of the Georgia Bulldog holding a sledgehammer.]
RA: At a weight of 255 pounds, BILLY 'THE SLEDGEHAMMER'
STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELE.
[The crowd's boos grow louder as Billy slingshots himself over the top
rope, into the ring and lifts his hands above his head.]
MH: Steele has a look of pure rage in his eyes tonight. That look has
not LEFT his face since his return to action here in the GCW after a
short hiatus.
SF: A short hiatus brought on by the 'World Criminal Element' Champion,
Viktor Karasopolis, who kidnapped him and tortured him in front of a
National Television Audience!
MH: Much like the President does every year with his 'State of the
Union' Address.
SF: Yeah, well...at least we're EXPECTING that. Billy Steele was jumped
like a $10 hooker.
PG: Well, not quite in THAT way, Simon, but the champ, Viktor
Karasopolis has definitely changed since winning the World Title.
The screwdriver incident with Brandon Simpson seems to have sent him
over the edge.
SF: Two wrongs don't make a right, Peter.
MH: Heh, thats the pot calling the kettle black, Simon.
SF: ....Dammit, Mike, you're as racist as VK.
[Did he say 'Dammit?']
##Dammit##
[Guess so.]
[The fans give out an immediate pop to resident GCW superstar, "The
Unlikely Hero" Ted Bruce. With dark shades over his eyes, and that popular
leather jacket of his... Ted's ready for some action!]
[Not really smiling or anything, Ted moves down the aisle non-chalantly
catching a few fans hands -- but still trying to keep his whole bad-ass
face attitude. Before getting to the ring... he removes his coat and tosses
it to the nearest ring announcer. As usual... the ring announcer is taken
off guard and gets smacked right in the face with the heavy leather coat.
But Ted doesn't give a DAMN about ALL THAT.]
[Pulling himself up with the ring ropes, he walks under the middle rope
and "revs the chainsaw" by making a pumping motion with his arm that
carries that tattoo that appropriately enough reads: "CHAINSAW".]
SF: And the 'Unlikely Winner' Ted Bruce is in the ring, and his ego is
so bright, he has to wear shades.
[Ding, ding, ding]
MH: And there's the bell!
[He's so observant.]
PG: Bruce trying to lock up with Steele right off the bat, but Steele
will have none of that! He ducks away from Bruce and starts dancing
around the 'Unlikely Hero.'
MH: A tactic that Ted Bruce employed last week in his win over Big Bubba
Johnson.
SF: Yeah, but Steele's doing it RIGHT. Bruce can't help but look like a
fool when he does it though. White boys ain't got no rhythm.
PG: Well, whatever reason Steele's doing it..its working! Bruce is
frustrated! He lunges at Steele....
MH: And Steele sidesteps Bruce's rush...Bruce has to catch himself or we
would have gone over the ropes!
SF: And Steele just grinning like a mofo. He is waiting for Bruce to
turn around...
[Bruce does, of course, and he looks embarrassed now, on TOP of being
frustrated. he runs at Steele again who swiftly ducks his clothesline.]
MH: Bruce clenching his fists here...but he is playing right into Billy
Steele's hands!
PG: Ted Bruce had BETTER get his head cooled down or this is going to be
over quick.
SF: Damn right....Steele has got him right where he wants him..OHHHH!!!
Bruce rushes in again and is met with a HARD kick to the midsection.
MH: Bruce is doubled over and Steele grabs his hair and whips him in to
the ropes...
SF: GREAT clothesline by Steele and Bruce is dazed early.
PG: Still think Steele sees Viktor Karasopolis when he looks at Ted
Bruce?
SF: Um ...I doubt it. Ted Bruce looks like a smarmy rich boy. Steele
would wanna kick his pansy, slacker, richie rich wannabe ass anyway.
[Bruce reverses an irish whip and sends Steele in. Steele holds onto the
ropes as Bruce goes for his Chainsaw chop]
MH: Oh ho...Steele saw that coming a mile away and is able to avoid it
quite handily.
PG: Ted Bruce simply HAS to get his act together here.
SF: Steele and Bruce FINALLY lock up here. Bruce breaks it..he has
Steele in an armbar.
MH: And Steele is wincing as Bruce cinches it in deep. Bruce pulls on
it again..but Steele grabs Ted's hands and is able to Reverse it!
PG: Billy Steele wastes no time He sends Bruce into the ropes and waits
for him..another clothesline!!!
MH: Ted Bruce to his feet...another clothesline by Steele!!!
[Crowd gives MASSIVE heat here]
PG: Steele has come to play tonight!
SF: And it doesn't look like Bruce did. Man, if he keeps this mindset,
he might end up getting hurt.
MH: What's that I hear in your voice, Simon...concern?
SF: No...its hope.
PG: Bruce is slow to get up now and Steele locks him in again. He kicks
him in the midsection...DDT!!!
MH: NO! Bruce slips out of it and rolls backwards. Both men on their
feet now. Steele comes after Bruce!
PG: Bruce picks up Steele..CLEAN body slam!
[Bruce starts to stomp on Steele...]
MH: Ted Bruce relentless now, pounding on Steele with stomp after
Stomp......
PG: He kicked Billy Steele out of the ring!
SF: The boy IS alive.....and he's daring Steele to come back into the
ring.
[Steele gets up, smiles at Bruce eerily, then slides back into the ring,
rolling away from a quick elbow drop attempt]
MH: Steele has his thinking cap on, dodging that trap with precision.
Both men are up. Steele in with a clothesline...
PG: Bruce is able to duck out of the way and Steele goes off the
opposite ropes..
[***SMACK***]
[CROWD POP]
SF: WHOA! Bruce levels Steele with a VICIOUS knife edge chop. Steele hit
so hard, his head bounced off the mat! That'll leave a mark.
MH: Hawkins shaking his head to clear it. That rattled his marbles a
little. Bruce has him on his feet. Picks him up...ATOMIC DROP!
Billy Steele hopping around in pain here and Bruce hits him in the
back of the head with an running elbow!
[Crowd gets louder. The camera focuses for a moment on a fan with an "A
'Hero' ain't nothin' but a sandwich"sign.]
PG: Nice combination of moves by Ted Bruce here! He quickly gets Billy
Steele to his feet.
MH: Bruce may be smelling blood here...
SF: Nah, thats just his socks.
[**SMACK**]
[POP]
PG: Bruce with a bellclap..and Steele falls against the ropes! Bruce
swings...oh my!!!
[Steele falls in a heap]
MH: BRUCE just hit Steele with a knuckle punch..RIGHT TO THE TEMPLE!
SF: Steele looks like he was knocked unconscious!
[The crowd pops as Bruce drags Steele's body to the center of the ring.]
MH: He's going for the pin right now!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3---NO!!!!!!!!!!!
SF: I CANT believe Steele got his shoulder up! I thought for sure he was
OUT of it!
PG: Apparently, Bruce can't either! He gets up and drags Billy Steele
to his feet by his arm and then SLAMS him to the canvas.
MH: Ted Bruce off the ropes....PERFECT elbow drop to Steele's sternum.
This is the Ted Bruce of old..
PG: That's what he needs to get back to, Michael. Especially if he wants
to beat Dan Devine at the Season's Beatings PPV on the 31st.
SF: The only way Ted Bruce will defeat Dan Devine is if Dan lays down
for him...gimme a break, you KNOW he won't.
MH: Also on that blockbuster Pay Per View...finally...Viktor Karasopolis
will face Brandon Simpson one on one for the World Heavyweight
Title.
PG: And ALL GCW wrestlers...past...present....future...everyone is
BANNED from ringside.
MH: you know Simpson has something up his sleeve though.
SF: Of course he does. The Punisher is always thinking..which is
something we obviously can't say about the Greek geek.
PG: Why's that, Simon?
SF: He's like an abused dog...beat on him enough and he'll come back and
jump on you, begging for more.
[Meanwhile, amongst this witty reparter, there IS a match going on. Ted
Bruce whips Steele into the ropes and Billy Steele leaps and hits Bruce
with a cross body block!]
MH: Great counter by Steele..the cover!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[just kidding]
MH: Bruce slips out the back door at two. This match, after an early
rush by Steele, has been pretty even.
PG: Steele and Bruce circling each other here....Steele with a rush and
he takes Bruce's legs out from under him!
[More heat from the crowd]
SF: Ah...here we go. Tactics...fundamentals.
MH: Right you are, Simon. Steele has Bruce's foot and is just kicking
away at the thigh.
PG: Smart wrestling by Steele tonight..he is being extremely
patient...not doing anything rash or crazy.
SF: Steele drops an elbow on Bruce's knee! And another. He is weakening
that joint....probably trying to prep Bruce for his figure four.
[The fans start cheering for Bruce, trying to encourage him]
SF: Shut up, you morons. Its not like that helps anyway. Sheez.
PG: It does though, Simon. Especially guys like Ted Bruce, who thrive on
fan support.
SF: Just weak bastards, thats all they are. Need other people's
approval in everything they do.
MH: Well, no matter how you feel about it, it seems to be working!!!
[Bruce kicks at Billy Steele with his free leg and sends him into the
ropes. As Steele comes back, Bruce leaps and hits Steele across the
chest with yet another clothesline....]
PG: Nice clothesline by Bruce, but Steele didn't go down!
SF: Wow! the adrenaline is rushing now! Ted Bruce pushes Steele back in
frustration...Steele responds with a push of his own and Bruce is
sent to the mat HARD!!
MH: Bruce is up though and rushes at Steele. The men are trading
punches. Bruce with a right hand. Steele with a left. This has
turned into a brawl!!
[The punches continue to be thrown back and forth, until Steele blocks one
of Ted Bruce's hooks and delivers two quick chops of his own, the sends him
into the ropes]
SF: Bruce off...Steele bends...BACK BODY DROP. Great move by Steele!
PG: And he isn't letting up. He picks up Bruce......a kick to the
gut...DDT!!!!
[Crowd boos LOUDLY!!!! Steele gets up and grins, then drops an elbow on
Bruce and does for the pin]
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3...NO!!!!
[LOUD Crowd POP!!!!!!!!!]
MH: BRUCE kicked out! BRUCE kicked out!!!
[What was that Michael?]
MH: BRUCE kicked out!!!!
[Oh, ok, thats what I thought you said.]
PG: Bruce slides out of the ring to regain his senses, probably the
right thing to do here.
SF: Yeah, take a breather. Get your head cleared up..then get back in
the ring and get your butt beat some more. Thats the way to go.
MH: Steele in the ring, watching Bruce....Steele is running across the
ring, he bounces off the ropes.......oh my GOD!!!!!!!!
[!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
[**CRASH**]
[Crowd goes NUTSY!!!!!]
PG: Billy Steele with a cross body plancha onto Bruce outside the
ring...and smashed him into the guardrail!!!!!!!!!
SF: Man, he hit BIG AIR that time..didn't even tough the ropes!
[The Double feature window opens and we see a slow motion replay of Billy
'Air Juvy' Steele flying over the ropes, hitting Bruce squarely in the
chest with a body block and driving him into the guardrail behind him. Ted
Bruce's head got whipped back and hit the rail pretty hard.]
MH: A great move by Steele....wait, is Ted Bruce bleeding?
PG: Um...yes, Michael I think he is! Bruce is bleeding from a cut on
the back of his head!
SF: Oh man, if ANYTHING that only made him mad! Bruce is a little
woozy, but he rushes Billy Steele anyway!
MH: Steele sidesteps, grabs Bruce..and sends him into the ringsteps!
[The referee has begun the count: 1]
PG: Steele has Bruce up and..uh oh...he isnt going to.....
[2]
MH: Oh yes he is!
SF: POWER BOMB onto the floor!
[Billy Steele crosses his arms in the 'X' which makes a group of X-A marks
at ringside go nuts.]
[3]
SF: That's it Hammer..thats it!!! Roll him into the ring and its over!!
[4]
[Steele does exactly that, picking up Bruce and rolling him under the
ropes back into the ring, then climbing back in himself.]
MH: Steele picks Ted Bruce up - he's putting him on the top ROPE!
PG: This can only mean one thing!!! Its time for the Hammer Blitz!
[Steele looks over to Simon and points. Simon just points back.]
SF: Yeah! Yeah! Please Hammer, DO hurt him!!!
[Steele locks in Bruce for the Hammer Blitz....]
[!!!!]
PG: BRUCE punches his way out of it..and pushes Billy Steele off the
turnbuckle to the mat!
MH: Steele landed hard! He's winded! Bruce comes off the ropes with an
elbow drop! HE NAILED IT!!!
PG: What a turn of events here!!!
SF: He's going for the pin! NO! Dammit..NO!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3!!
SF: THANK GOD!!! Steele got his shoulder up at the LAST second!
[Crowd 'oooooooohs' because it was SO close.]
MH: Steele escapes that time! Bruce picks him up, spins him
around.....kicks him in the back!!
[Crowd pops - they know what THAT means]
PG: He's got Steele locked.....FRONT SUPLEX! And he hit it!! That
means..
MH: That means its time for the HOMAGE MAKER!!!
[The crowd goes NUTSOIDAL as Bruce locks in the Homage Maker. Steele is
struggling..]
PG: There's no way out! This one is over!!!!
[!!!!]
[Oh Peter, ignorant one. Have you no faith?!]
SF: YES!!!!! *hahaha* Steele just poked Bruce in the eye! That'll break
just about any hold!!
MH: Indeed it will, and Bruce is checking his eyes to make sure he isn't
bleeding. Meanwhile, Steele is back to his feet!
[Bruce turns around and gets a kick to the midsection. Steele drops him
with a quick DDT, which gets the crowd booing again.]
SF: Steele is fighting through this.....whoa!
PG: UH OH! He's got Bruce's legs.....
[Steele just stares out at the crowd and smirks at their boos. He shakes
his head and...]
MH: He is going for the figure four! Step over toe hold applied....!!!
[!!!!!!!!!!]
[CROWD POPS!!!!]
PG: Bruce reaches up and grabs Steele's hair..He pulls him over for the
small package!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!---
SF: WHOA, Billy Steele's used his momentum to roll through the move -
he's reversed the pin!!!!!!!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Crowd BOOOOOOOOS!]
[Ding. Ding. Ding]
SF: YES! He got him!!!!!!
RA: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this bout.....BILLY 'THE
SLEDGEHAMMER' STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELE!!!!!!
PG: A GREAT counter by Billy Steele gives him a CLEAN win over Ted
Bruce!
[Ted Bruce is kneeling in the ring, looking.....pissed. He hits his hands
against the mat and stands, going to confront the referee. Steele is making
his way back to the dressing room area, down that aisle, celebrating his
win, jawing with the fans.]
MH: A heck of a performance, Peter. And a GREAT match.....Steele gets
the duke, fans. We'll be back!!!
*****COMMERCIALS***********************************************************
Have you ever thought WWF, WCW and ECW should just merge together and form
one large wrestling organization? Well, we took the thought one step
further. The World Wide Wrestling Merger, where WWF, WCW and ECW are all
housed into one large e-fed. See WWF square off against WCW! ECW vs. WWF!
Anything's possible in the WWWM! Check it out at
http://members.aol.com/TSawyerII/WWWM.html
*******************************************************COMMERCIALS*********
[September, 1998 - The Pond, Anaheim California. Under short notice, the
arena filled in rather nicely for House of Pain. One of the feature
bouts, of course, was Angelo "Angel" Cronata challenging Brandon Simpson
for the light heavyweight title. But he challenged him for a lot more.
This match was one war of many challenging the X-Assassins supremacy.
[Pearl Jam's "Yellow Ledbetter" is providing the soundtrack at the
moment, but for now the vocals have been faded out as we are treated to
the visual greatness of this match.]
[Early in the match, Simpson goes for the win by locking on a full nelson -
- the prelude to the most dangerous finisher in wrestling today. Quickly,
Angelo reaches around and grabs Simpson's neck, hops over the top rope, and
Simpson's neck collides with the rope, his body ricochet's back.]
*I know
I said, 'I know what I wear,*
[While Simpson is in agony in the middle of the ring, Angelo landed wrong
and is also in agony - on the outside.]
* not a boxer or the bag'*
[Quickly, the video footage cuts away again. Simpson locks on the full
nelson and, quickly this time, drops Cronata down with the Russian leg
sweep.]
*Ah yeah...can you see them?*
[And just before the three count, Cronata manages to kick out.]
*Out on the porch, yeah,*
[Another quick cut away, and we are reminded of the Boston Crab that
Cronata applied on Simpson that night, pulling WAY back, putting an extreme
amount of pressure on the lower back, and almost getting Simpson to give
up.]
*but they don't wave*
[Cronata executes a flying somersault neckbreaker, a prelude to
Daybreak.]
*I see them, round the front way, yeah...*
[Cronata takes Simpson to the top rope for the Daybreak - a Super Shoulder
Neckbreaker. But Simpson delivers a low blow, knocking Cronata off the
rope. Simpson than Punishes Cronata and gets the pinfall victory.]
*And I know and I know I don't want to stay*
[Cronata is anguished in the middle of the ring, the crowd booing him,
Simpson, the system, life, everything that is unfair.]
*Make me cry...*
[The vocals to "Yellow Ledbetter" again fade out, leaving just the awesome
guitar performance. We now see a part of one of Cronata's flashes from
after the defeat. This scene, like so much of his stuff, was inspired by a
movie - Rocky IV for this particular one. Cronata is driving down a
Chicago road in a black sports car, remembering things like his defeat, the
fans ridiculing him, his brother's death (though he wasn't actually there):
[The camera follows a trail of intestines to what appears to be a dead body
dressed in a Marines Uniform. The eyelids suddenly open, and, looking into
the black, vacant eyes of Giuseppi Cronata, the words, "You couldn't even
do this for me."]
["Yellow Ledbetter" gives way to Radiohead's "Paranoid Android" and that
last clip gives way to Angelo Cronata in the ring, giving what he thought
would be his last words - his suicide note on live tv.]
*Please could you stop the noise
I'm tryin a get some REST*
[His mouth is moving, but we can't hear what he is saying. What could
this be interpreted as? No feeling behind his words? Lies? Emptiness?]
*From all the unborn chicken voices in my head*
[Cronata climbs the top rope, and reveals a knife by putting it to his
throat.]
*huh, what's that?*
[Brandon Simpson comes from literally and figuratively out of the blue,
knocking Cronata off the turnbuckle, sending the knife sprawling to a
safe landing.]
*what's that?*
[Brandon Simpson comes from literally and figuratively out of the blue,
knocking Cronata off the turnbuckle, sending the knife sprawling to a
safe landing.]
[As Cronata is carried away by doctors, the song is edited, skipping
some lines . . . ]
*ambition makes you look very ugly*
[the image pauses as Cronata is moments away from disappearing from the
arena, kicking and screaming.]
*kicking, squealing, gucci little piggy*
[Now we are being treated to images of people who Cronata feels has
betrayed him at some point, or at least he felt this way at that time.]
[Mark Warren]
*you don't remember*
[John Boyd]
*you don't remember*
[Jordan Thorn]
*Why don't you remember my name?*
[Tommy Kain]
*Off with his head*
[Ken Stanley]
*off with his head man*
[Bryan Anthony]
*why won't he remember my name?*
[And finally the little red headed boy, #not the one who appeared in the
previous X-Cops flash# about 7 years old, who appeared in the second
Cronata flash in the GCW - Angelo gave him an autograph and the kid
asked him to be his dad. This kid represents all the fans to Cronata.]
["Paranoid Android" fades away to nothing, as Cronata is standing in the
ring with the X-Assassins, who at that time consisted of Brandon Simpson,
Dan Devine, Viktor K., Tubb Tytler, Louis Scrapinetti, and Rakeem. Brandon
pulls out an X-Assassins shirt to Cronata.]
BS: (voiceover) Like Al Pacino said in Scarface, I never betrayed a man
who didn't deserve it.
[Cronata turns away, rejecting the t-shirt]
AP: (voice over) Let's get this straight. I neva' [CENSORED] anyone
ova' _in my life_ didn't have it comin' to. You got that?
[Cronata pulls off the shirt he is wearing to reveal an X-A tattoo spanning
the whole of his back.]
AC: (voice over) X-A runs through my blood!
[We now here another song from the Radiohead collection: "Karma Police"]
*This is what you get*
[We see the ever popular image of Brandon Simpson leaping off a top rope,
landing with a frog splash on Sunset's stretcher - the move that ended his
career.]
*This is what you get*
[We see Simpson diggin out Viktor Karasopolis' eye shortly after losing
his shot at the Heavyweight title.]
*This is what you get*
[We see Dan Devine and Angelo Cronata beating the hell out of Chris
Michaels, deciding it would be more fun than for Cronata to face him for
the Light Heavyweight Title.]
*This is what you get
When you mess with us*
[We now see Masked Fury, after all but beating Cronata, remove his mask
to reveal none other than Chris Michaels.]
*Phew for a minute there I lost myself*
[We see Cronata walk out on an X-A in-ring as a result. Simpson and
Devine look at each other, shrug, and laugh.]
*Phew for a minute there, I lost myself*
[The ending chords give way to a return of "Paranoid Android," as we see
Cronata, equipped with a straight jacket, locked in a padded room
shortly after his suicide attempt.]
*That's it sir your leaving
the crackle of pig skin*
*the dust & the screaming
the yuppies networking*
*the panic
the vomit*
*the panic
the vomit*
*god loves his children
god loves his children yeah!*
[The image and the song fade away to blackness.]
[And, still enveloped in blackness, we can faintly hear something. Put
on your closed captioning!]
*Don't the best of them bleed it out*
[So, that's a good song - "My Hero" by The Foo Fighters! Grammy nominated
I might add. Make the T.V. louder so you can hear it!]
*While the rest of them peter out!*
[It's still too faint. Louder!]
*Truth or Consequence, say it aloud*
[A little bit louder now!]
*Use that evidence, race it around*
[What, the volume doesn't go any louder? Sucker!!!]
[Suddenly in a burst of sound and color, we see Cronata perched on the top
rope, the fans are on there feet cheering him (fyi, this was the night of
his loss to Simpson, and the clip was chosen because of the decibal level
the crowd reached before the match.]
*KUDOS MY HERO!*
[Cronata backflips off the top rope, landing perfectly.]
*LEAVING ALL THE BEST!*
[Now we see Cronata hitting a missile drop kick to the back of Brandon
Simpson. This maneuver ultimately gave Jordan Thorn the heavyweight
title.]
*THE BEST YOU KNOW MY HERO!*
[This is followed by a repeat of the clip from the Cronata-Simpson fight,
where Cronata has the Boston Crab locked on tight. This time it is at a
different angle. Before, when the focus was the agony of Simpson, now we
see the determination of Cronata - a passion, a mission behind his eyes.]
*THE ONE THAT'S ON!*
[Everything again fades away, and we are left with a caption in white
against the black screen."
"Turn your attention to the sunlight, and the shadows will be left behind.
And than we will all measure up."
[FIN]
[Camera opens in the office of Brandon Simpson. He is still in his
wrestling attire... it looks like we're in the wee hours of the morning
here, and Simpson is on the phone. His forehead and right arm both bear
bandages, obviously from cuts from going through that glass at the last
Aftermath.]
BS: You got that thing for me? Yeah... OK... well, I can't really talk
about it right now... got cameras in here. Yeah, the wrestling
thing. Oh, you saw it? Yeah... the police were right outside...
they didn't know what was going on. I think they were going to
detain Karasopolis or something. I just played dumb and let it go
on. Yeah, anything to make his life hell. All right then, man...
take it easy... I'll have that cash for you tomorrow.
[Simpson hangs up the phone and addresses the camera.]
BS: Look, it's late, I'm cut and bandaged, and I don't really feel like
messing with you people. Now, consider yourselves lucky if I let
you walk out of here without incident. You know what gets tiring...
how many times can I say, "I'm going to kick VK's by god, Benedict
Arnold ass!" and it not get boring. I mean, VK... you've been lucky
so far. A little glass doesn't hurt the by god Punisher. If the
police hadn't been out there to break that little party up, I would
have broken a parking meter off the side of the street and stuck it
up your Greek ass... sideways. But in all the confusion, something
else was going on...
[Simpson pulls a wrestling magazine off his desk, and rips out a picture.
It's a picture of Angelo Cronata, pre-XA days.]
BS: One more Benedict Arnold... you know... Cronata, I saved your life.
Right in the middle of the ring, I saved your life. At the time, I
thought I was doing you a favor. But now that I see what you've
aligned yourself with, I should have let you do it. Yeah, I'm
talking about you, Chris Michaels. You know, you went out of GCW,
and I took up for you. I was told that the powers that be were
getting at me by getting rid of you. Now, I realize, that you, my
friend, are the original Benedict Arnold. I never really labeled
you as such, Michaels, but now... you come out on television and
embarass yourself by saying, "I took a page out of the X Assassins'
book." When we meet in the ring Michaels... I'm going to take the
whole damn "book" and shove it down your throat, because Michaels,
not only will you pay for your own stupid comments, but you'll also
pay for the crimes of Angelo Cronata. Michaels, I dare you to get
in the ring at the same time as the by god Punisher. There won't be
any Condolences from Vancouver... there'll be Condolences from by
god Kentucky when you go down with the Punishment. Cronata, if
you're smart, you'll never show your face. And Michaels, if you're
smart, which you're not, you'd better... SAY YOUR PRAYERS!
[Camera fades with Simpson's last comments.]
[Cuts to the arena ... ]
M A I N E V E N T
Written by Dan Gray
Edited by Mark "I write for PPVs" Warren
(aka Didn't feel like writing it)
RA: Ladies and Gentlemen, its time for the MAAAAAAAIN EVENT!
[Insert Obligatory Huge Crowd Pop here]
RA: Coming first to the ring....
[The lights go out as "The Cro-National Anthem" plays over the P.A. system.
Hundreds of blue and white strobe lights start circulating through the
crowd as the crowd cheers loudly for their returned hero. After a short
delay, the one and only Angelo Cronata enters the arena as pyros explode to
both sides of him. Cronata raises his clenched fists high over his head,
with a big grin on his face.]
RA: Weighing in at 192 pounds........ANGELO CROOOOOOONATA!!!!
[Yes the crowd goes nuts. Lambs. GROW A BACKBONE people! @#$%&@#$]
[Sorry about that]
[As he calmly, confidently, and very slowly makes his way to ringside.
Facially, he has short dark brown hair, a "perfect nose" as People magazine
said, dark blue eyes, pearly white teeth, a smile to die for, and a nice
tan. He has scar tissue on his left arm from an old injury, but they are
hardly noticeable. Not very intimidating to look at, but he's managed to
fuck some people up in that ring.]
[As the camera pans around him about halfway down the aisle, giving us a
full look at his attire. He is wearing his old blue and white wrestling
pants with "Angel" written down the left leg in white letters. He is also
sporting his old t-shirt, the hottest selling item for another federation.
It is royal blue and sleeveless. Airbrushed on the front is a profile pic
of Cronata from the neck up, grimacing from blood that has wondered into
his eye, but also seemingly incredibly happy. On the back is the saying,
"If there was no tomorrow, how hard would you work today?" Tucked into
the shirt is the Marine issued dog tags of his late brother Giuseppi, who
died at Bosnia.]
[When he gets to the ring, he hops up onto the near turnbuckle and raises
an "X" high above his head before swiping it down to symbolize the end is
near for this rogue group. He than punches a right fist into the air,
exclaming, "YEA!" as the crowd continues to cheer. Cronata confidently
nods, a big grin across his face, and than performs a backflip off the top
turnbuckle, of course landing with ease.]
[He makes his way across the ring to the far turnbuckle, which he again
climbs, raising two clenched fists over his head, and again, he backflips
off the turnbuckle. Cronata now goes to his corner and settles in. One
noticeable detail is that he has left the t-shirt on, hiding that X-A
tattoo that he so foolishly paid for.]
RA: And his TAG TEAM PARTNER.....
[Two red flashing lights similar to the ones found on a police car turn on.
Simultaneously, Chris Michaels theme, "Hate" BOOMS over the PA system and
2 strobe lights kick on. Red lazer lights begin to shine from the
entrance.]
RA: He hails from Vancouver, British Columbia. Weighing in tonight at
two hundred and eighteen pounds ... and standing at five feet eleven
inches, here is ... "THE CARNAGE" CHRIS MICHAELS!!!
[Chris Michaels steps out of the entrance wearing a black trenchcoat over a
black, long-sleeved, netted shirt. The black netted shirt is tucked into
his pants style tights. On his tights is an air-brushed red and black
swirl design that goes all over the tights. He walks out about 6 feet
bright pyros begin to go off. Michaels walks through them, and walks a few
more feet forward and outstretches his arms to his sides. He lets his
long, black, wet hair hang in front of his face as he tilts his head to the
lift a bit and then shifts to the right. As he approaches the ringside
area he lets his trenchcoat slide off of his arms and drop to the floor.
Michaels takes his right hand and moves it through his hair, moving it out
of his face.]
PG: MY GOD, the place is rocking! The crowd is REALLY jacked for this
match.
SF: Yeah, baby...they know its time for the MAN to come out...and
they're as excited about it as I am!!
MH: I beg to differ, Simon. These fans are on their feet to see this
newly formed teams! Michaels and Cronata are definitely getting
attention.
SF: Yeah, attention. Same kind of attention people give car accidents.
Morbid curiousity.
[Michaels and Cronata pose in the ring, playing to the crowd.]
SF: Damn rubberneckers.
RA: AND THEIR OPPONENTS....
["Say Your Prayers" blasts over the PA system, and the crowd immediately
lets out a LONG, loud 'BOOOOOOO!!'. They know that this music signals the
coming of the by god Punisher, Brandon Simpson. Gorgeous, as always, is
on the arm of Simpson. Directly behind him is Dan Devine, with a shit
eating grin on his face.]
RA: At a total combined weight of 441 [give or take a few]
pounds......representing the X-ASSASSINS...."The Devastator" Dan
Devine and...The Punisher, Brandon SIIIIIIIIIIIMPSOOOOOON!
[Crowd gives more heat than the Miami Arena during basketball season.]
MH: The tension between these four men is amazingly thick, Simon. You
can feel it in the air!
SF: That's just Cronata's hair gel.
[Ding Ding Ding]
MH: And....Michaels and Devine starting this matchup...both men circling
each other now and Devine in with a clothesline attempt that
Michaels ducks! And her turns and HITS ONE of his known and Devine
is down!
PG: That took Devine by total surprise, and the crowd loves it!
[Devine gets up and runs his hands through his hair, and waves at Michaels
to bring it on.]
SF: Heheh...show him Devine....little man like that can't even bruise
you.
MH: Devine grabs Michaels...here's the whip in! Michaels back...leap
frog! Devine turns, tries to hit a clothesline on the way
back..Michaels ducks it! Grabs Devine...MICHAELS! Swinging
Neckbreaker!!!
PG: Great move by Michaels..and now he slides out of the ring to work
the crowd a bit.
[Michaels flexes his muscles and smiles at a young blonde in the front row.
She seems to enjoy it.]
SF: Uh....Ok Michaels..nice move, but..its a little early to be
celebrating.
PG: I agree Simon, it was only one move. Devine over there now....off
the apron with a double axe handle! Michaels is sent to the floor!
SF: HAHAHA....serves that poser right....
MH: Michaels shaking his head to clear it...Devine slides into the ring
and tags Simpson!!!
[The crowd boos lustily!!!]
SF: Here comes the MAN...he climbs between the ropes and grabs Michaels
by the hair and drags him to the apron. Michaels throws a punch at
Simpson..Simpson counters with one of his own! Its a brawl here!
MH: Simpson throws another punch and Michaels is through the ropes BACK
into the ring! Simpson has his fighting gloves on tonight!
[Michaels grabs the ropes to get to his feet and Simpson throws a punch to
his midsection. He then grabs Michaels and sets him up for...]
PG: Simpson is going to suplex him! Oh my God!
SF: Oh man!!! Take out that flower loving Pansy, Punisher!
MH: Simpson lifts him up!!!!!!!!
[!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
[**CRASSSSSSH**]
PG: OH MY GOD!!!
SF: HOLY CRAP!
MH: Simpson just nailed Michaels with a slingshot suplex and Michaels
landed back first across the guardrail!!!!
SF: THAT'S gonna leave a mark!!
PG: Or TWO!!
MH: Devine is in the ring, Simpson rolls out of the way and crosses his
arms above his head into the 'X.' The crowd not very appreciative!!!
SF: That's because the crowd is full of whiny babies in need of a
'hero!'
PG: What's Devine doing...running across the ring with a full head of
steam!!!
SF: LOOK OUT BELOW!!!
[!!!!!!!]
MH: Devine leaps over the top rope!! CORKSCREW LEGDROP!!!!
PG: He nailed Michaels SQUARELY in the head and Michaels falls from the
guardrail in a heap!!!!
SF: Man, the X-Assassins came tonight to FIGHT!!!!
MH: Cronata is down to the floor and he chases off BOTH Simpson and
Devine away. He looks PISSED!
SF: Of COURSE he is, Simpson and Devine are ruining their date tonight!
PG: Well, Cronata is checking on Michaels and helping him to ringside.
He pats him on the back and goes back to the corner.
SF: What a nice guy...
MH: He certainly is.
SF: What a wimp...
MH: He cert- hey!
SF: Hehe
[Michaels tags in Croanta. Simpson tags in Devine.]
PG: Whoa, I am surprised that Simpson tagged out there. I would think
that he would WANT to get a piece of Cronata....we know how the
Punisher feels about 'traitors.'
SF: He is saving that for later, trust me. Cronata is gonna be squashed
like a GRAPE.
MH: The men are locking up...Cronata with a nice armwringer.....
PG: Devine rolls out of it....Kip up.....He reverses it! Nice counter by
Devine!!!
SF: The Devastator is THE Light Heavyweight in this fed, baby. None of
the others matter!
MH: Cronata with a quick kick to the gut..he drapes his leg over
Devine's Shoulders...Cronata backflips out of it!!
[Crowd POP!!!!]
PG: Cronata follows it up with a legsweep!!! Devine falls hard! He hits
his head hard on the mat! Cronata with a legdrop and a cover!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!--------------
SF: Not EVEN CLOSE, buddy...you're not gonna beat Devine with crap like
that!
PG: Devine is back up and they lock up again!
MH: Armbar by Cronata!! NO!!!
[*whap*]
SF: HAHAHAAHA
MH: What a cheap shot by Devine! A punch, right in the jaw!!
SF: That will stop your fancy backflip moves, WON'T it, angel boy???
MH: Cronata tags out to Michaels and he rushes at Devine with a
clothesline. Devine counters with a grab of the arm into an
armbar!!! Michaels with a flip out..and they lock up!!!
PG: Nice move by Michaels...Devine whips him into the ropes.....into the
corner!!! Michaels runs in...jumps up onto the turnbuckle......
[!!!!!!!!!!]
SF: WOW!!!
MH: MOONSAULT BODYPRESS by Michaels!!!
[Crowd goes ballistic!!!!]
PG: The pin!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MH: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, Devine JUST made it out!!!!!
SF: CLOSE CALL!!!
PG: Wow!!!
[The crowd lets out one of its disappointed 'OOOOOOOOOOOH's]
SF: Devine rolls back into his corner and tags Simpson! Simpson in like
a ball of fire!! He rushes Michaels! Clothesline!!!
MH: Michaels falls into the corner and tags in Cronata!! HERE WE GO!!!
[The crowd POPS like kernels at a theatre concession stand]
PG: Cronata in...Simpson rushes.....kick to the midsection by Simpson,
body slam!!
MH: Simpson relentless!!! Elbow Drop! Another!!! Another!!!
SF: He drags Cronata to his feet...NOW he'll get his!!!
PG: He whips Cronata in, CHOP to the chest!!!
[Crowd boos as Simpson taunts a fan in the front row]
MH: Cronata is standing up, but he isn't going after Simpson, he is
waiting it out....
PG: He's lost his aggressiveness from earlier..he seems hesitant!
SF: Simpson is NOT having any of that! He comes in and hits Cronata
across the face with a forearm, driving him back into the corner!!!
MH: He whips Cronata out.....REVERSAL! Cronata sends Simpson in to the
corner...Simpson bounces out of the corner and runs at Cronata! That
had no effect!!
SF: Simpson is running on adrenaline now! Cronata ducks under the
clothesline.....kicks Simpson to the midsection....grabs him around
the waist...GUTWRENCH SUPLEX!!!
[Crowd goes NUTS!!!!]
MH: Simpson is on his knees, clutching his back!! He falls right back on
his face!! What impact!!
SF: Man, that suplex took a lot out of him..Simpson is having trouble
moving!
PG: Unbelievable suplex by Cronata..he tags in Michaels!!!
[CROWD gets on their feet and cheers! Cronata makes a slitting motion and
goes to the top rope!!]
MH: Uh oh!!!! This could be the end already!!
PG: Michaels going over to Simpson..a tandem move coming up!?
SF: If they hit it...I don't know..if the Punisher can...
[!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
MH: Simpson moved!! He just got up and rolled away! Michaels is just
staring at him!! Simpson has this HUGE smile on his face.....oh
no!!!
SF: OH YES!!!
[!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
PG: Cronata hits Michaels with a FLYING BULLDOG! Michaels is DOWN in the
ring! I don't believe this!!!!!! It was all a setup!!!
SF: OF COURSE it was a setup! HAHAHAHAHA. The X-Assassins strike
again!!
MH: Cronata turns his back on the fans again!!!
[Who does he think he is, Viktor Karasopolis???]
PG: And Cronata and Devine now just STOMPING away at Michaels while
Simpson is asking for a microphone!!!
[The three X-A members in the ring start pounding on Michaels, increasing
his humility and his pain and talking on the microphones in turns.]
BS: Hell of a Gutwrench there Angelo.
AC: Thanks. It was fun wrestling against two guys who measured up for
a change. Hey Brando, what do a Canadian Wet Orchid and a Japanese
Mosquito have in common?
BS: I don't know Angelo, what?
AC: They both suck!
[All three give off one of those fake laughs. They know it wasn't funny,
but it gets the point across.]
AC: You fool. You idiot. Do you honestly think I could be persuaded
from the X-A, from _my_ family by a pussy like you!?! Do you think
I would return to my lame ass ways to be your toadie!?!
[BOO!]
AC: Yea, boo! Poor Chris. He got done wrong. And who are the dumb
rednecks that believed it? You should've seen your faces - all of
you - when I came to the ring with Chris. It was classic. Hahaha.
Ehhh. I'm gonna laugh over that one for weeks. HEEHEEHEE.
[BOO!]
[Cronata starts slapping the back of Michaels' head like that big brother
that was always an asshole, taking advantage of being bigger and stronger
and, well, just better than his little brother. Like a big brother who
wants to teach the kid a lesson. But Angelo doesn't want to teach Chris a
lesson. Not yet. He just likes bullying his sorry ass.]
AC: Come on pussy. Get up. Get up you puss.
[BOO!]
[The camera captures a small blonde haired, freckle-faced girl in the front
row tearing up. Angelo notices her too.]
AC: Hey Dan, look at that girl over there. I think she's crying!
[Angelo bends over in the general direction of the little girl and rubs his
eyes.]
AC: BOOHOO! Yea, keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about.
[BOO!]
MH: Will someone stop this. Cut his mic. She's 10 for crissakes.
AC: Fine. Keep crying. Y'know why? Because your 23 year old sister,
she's your mother too!
[BOO!]
AC: And your uncle, when he's alone with you on Christmas, well, we all
know about it! And it's funny as hell!
MH: Oh, well, I think we are seeing Cronata sink to a new low here
today. Through all his taunts to his colleagues, he has always held
his relationship to the fans sacred. He never once ridiculed them.
This, this is just despicable.
AC: Still crying? Well, cry about this.
[Angelo yanks Michaels to his feet by the hair and takes him to the top
rope, and climbs up with him for a Super Shoulder Neckbreaker -- The
Daybreak. But Angelo took to much time to set the move up, and Michaels
wiggles out, knocking Cronata down to the mat. Causing the crowd to give a
HUGE pop!!! Cronata falls hard.]
PG: Oh my!! MICHAELS ISN'T DONE YET!
[Michaels climbs down from the buckle and goes after Cronata - did he
forget there were 2 others in the ring?? Simpson hits him across the
shoulders and.....uh oh!]
MH: No dammit! NO!
SF: YES! Dammit, YES!! DO IT! PUNISH THAT MAN!
[Simpson puts Michaels on his face with The Punishment and then gets up and
laughs at him. He puts a foot on Michaels' back and lifts his arms over
his head into the 'X' - and the crowd BOOOOOOOS loudly!. Dan Devine makes
his way to the top rope!]
PG: NOT AGAIN!! He's had enough!!
SF: He's had enough when the By God Punisher SAYS he has had enough,
Peter!
[Devine hits Michaels with the Devine Intervention and the crowd just LOSES
it, booing VERY loudly.]
[Cronata is up now, wiping blood from his mouth. He grabs the mike from the
mat.]
AC: Big man!?! Countered a move once in your life!?!
[!!!]
[Simpson takes the mic and looks out at the crowd.]
BS: ..........
[The crowd boos Simpson about as hard as they were booing him before he
took the mic.]
BS: My goodness... what do we have here? A piece of Canadian crap. Why
don't you just go join up with the Canucks, EH, bitch? Michaels,
you're a wanna be. You thought you "took a page" from the XA's
book... well, my friend, the only thing you'll EVER take from us...
is a beating. And Michaels, you take one very, very, very well...
VK... take a long look at this, you Greek ass... this was the
original Benedict Arnold... you're just one in a long line of
suckers who had the nerve to try to turn their backs on the family.
It's one thing to leave us, but it's entirely another to stab us in
the back... VK... I'll see you at Season's Beatings, and you'll get
the BEATING of your pathetic Greek life... and oh, VK... if you're
still in jail, quit dropping the damn soap...those convicts don't
want any of your Greek ass.
[Simpson laughs as he throws the mic down and drops an elbow on Michaels.]
MH: Ladies and gentlemen ... we'll see you in seven days.
==========================================================
Global Championship Wrestling and all of the characters
portrayed in it are Copyright © 1997-99 to their respective
handlers and may not be used without expressed written
consent from them or the GCW.
All rights reserved.
Mr. Warren
dai...@fwb.gulf.net
http://members.xoom.com/gcw/