All-RSFC Award Nominations
Dylan F. Alexander
Here's nomination form for this year's (much smaller) Awards.
You may nominate two people for each award. All nominations
must be _posted, not emailed_ under this thread. Final voting
will be emailed and confidential.
Roughly the top 5 vote getters during the nomination period
(probably a week) will be on the final ballot. I'll look
for natural breaks in the number of nominations. [Ex. If
the top four people get 5-7 nominations each and the fifth
guy gets 2, he's not going on the final ballot.]
List your one or two nominees under each title. Cut out the
rest from your reply, please.
IMPORTANT NOTE: Nominations for a Best Post category should
include the author, the gist of the post, and the full text
should be posted if no one else had done it yet and you happen
to have a copy.
Cut here when you reply.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
BEST FISHERMAN
BEST BAIT
POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
FUNNIEST POST
NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
THE MANU TROPHY
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>,
dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) wrote:
}BEST FISHERMAN
Ted Smith
Christopher Noel Koontz
}BEST BAIT
"Mississippi -- Classless backass crackers" by Koontz
}POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Deke Arndt
Steve Casburn
}FUNNIEST POST
Divinium/Lipbalmium thing by Deke
Koontz comparing Hitler and Bear Bryant
}NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
}THE MANU TROPHY
S. Zecker
Jon Sadow
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: iy...@jove.acs.unt.edu (Koontz Christopher Noel)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Misissippi -- classless backass crackers
Date: 3 Sep 1997 15:44:19 GMT
Organization: University of North Texas
Lines: 13
Message-ID: <5uk0kj$8...@hermes.acs.unt.edu>
NNTP-Posting-Host: jove.acs.unt.edu
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.2 PL2]
Xref: news.tamu.edu rec.sport.football.college:271396
Its going to be interesting to see the SMU -- Old Miss matchup this
weekend. A school that has kept it'self free from recruiting violations
in the 90s against a team coached by Jackie Sherrill, who's name says it
all. It should also be remembered that Bobby Collins honed his cheating
prowess at Missisipi State before infecting SMU with the cheating virus.
How the heck does Missisippi have 3 division 1 schools, anyways? Their
ranked, what, like 50th in the USA in literacy? So. Miss. should be moved
to I-AA or something.
Chris -- The Sun Never Sets On The Western Athletic Conference!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
> From: Deke Arndt <dar...@ou.edu>
> Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
> Subject: Re: Weather Grid
> Date: Wed, 06 Aug 1997 17:36:49 -0500
> Message-ID: <33E8FC...@ou.edu>
> References: <33E69E...@iastate.edu> <33E894...@buff.nbc.com>
> <33E8A4...@ou.edu> <33E8B7...@buff.nbc.com>
> <5sae7n$j...@piglet.cc.utexas.edu> <33E8D2...@ou.edu>
> <REMOVEFORMAILjleah...@lat1mac39.cchem.berkeley.edu>
> Reply-To: dar...@ou.edu
> NNTP-Posting-Host: switzer.ocs.ou.edu
>
>
> Jim Leahy wrote:
> >
> > In article <33E8D2...@ou.edu>, Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
> >
> > : Mathews J. Thundyil wrote:
> > : > Besides, if Oklahomies were at the pinnacle, it must not be a very
> > : > tall molehill.
> > :
> > : And if Texicans are below us...well...you don't need a periodic table to
> > : figure it out.
> >
> > FWIW, gold is directly below silver in the periodic table.
> >
> > Jim Leahy (and silver is directly below copper)
>
>
> --------------
> | 30 |
> | Dv |
> | Divinity |
> --------------
> | 27 |
> | Lb |
> | Lipbalmium |
> --------------
>
> QED.
>
> HANTA YO,
> Deke
>
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: iy...@nfs-jove.acs.unt.edu (Koontz Christopher Noel)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: 10-3-39
Date: 24 Oct 1997 14:31:31 GMT
Organization: University of North Texas
Lines: 17
Message-ID: <62qbg3$7...@hermes.acs.unt.edu>
References: <62len2$jtk$1...@news.globeset.com>
<62lqhh$l...@r02n01.cac.psu.edu> <62o13c$g38$1...@news.globeset.com>
NNTP-Posting-Host: jove.acs.unt.edu
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.2 PL2]
Xref: news.tamu.edu rec.sport.football.college:289629
Chance Harris (cha...@avalanche.globeset.com) wrote:
> October 3, 1939. Figured it had something to do with Nazis.
> Or maybe the Bear.
Hitler -- courted wealthy industrialists
Bear -- courted wealthy alumni
Hitler -- wore distinct hat (peaked Wehrmacht issue)
Bear -- wore distinct hat (houndstooth fedora)
Hitler -- cheered for by militaristic SA and SS
Bear -- cheered for by militaristic A&M Corps of Cadets
Hitler -- revered by bigots in Germany to this day
Bear -- revered by bigots in Alabama to this day
Just "coincidence"?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
Dylan Alexander dy...@tamu.edu
"Please Dylan, in the name of all that's holy, leave us be. If
annoyance were a crime, you'd be Jeffrey Dahmer." - C. Chase
Marine Phonics Catskills
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
> BEST FISHERperson
Marin
> BEST BAIT
I am not a (bigot/racist/liar/rich/) [[choose one]]
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
skippy
> FUNNIEST POST
pretty much anything I wrote
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
UTHORNHEAD
> THE MANU TROPHY
szecker
--
War Eagle!
a.
.......I can't believe I don't have Ted in there.
pink...@webtv.net
<stuff on rules snipped>
>
----------------------------------------------------------------------
> BEST FISHERMAN
Goob Smith (Go Goober!)
> BEST BAIT
Justin Greenfield
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Biggdan
> FUNNIEST POST
Charles Hoequist and Bob Gretta, for their Tech 10-FSU 3-Officials 39
rantings
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Howard Salwasser and JEC8686
> THE MANU TROPHY
Gary McManus for his attacks on news:alt.skateboard.
El Pink
-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Post to Usenet
Charles Hoequist
In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>, dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) writes:
|> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
|> BEST FISHERMAN
Ted Smith
McManus
|>
|>
|> BEST BAIT
|>
|>
|> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Clark Moore
Steve Casburn
|>
|>
|> FUNNIEST POST
|>
|>
|> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
|>
|>
|> THE MANU TROPHY
Marin
Ralph Kennedy
SLACKER LAUREATE OF RSFC
Dylan Alexander
--Ralph Kennedy, {ames,gatech,husc6,rutgers}!ncar!noao!asuvax!kennedy
College Station {allegra,decvax,ihnp4,oddjob}--^
dethrones Austin ^---------------The Wrong Choice
as slacker capital, internet: ken...@asuvax.eas.asu.edu
film at 11
Daryl D. Spillmann
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> BEST FISHERMAN
>
Ted SmithJEC8686
>
>
> BEST BAIT
Marin's post about 1,000,000 people who died aboard the Amistad, when in
reality there were 53?, and the boat didn't sink.
>
>
>
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
The author of "Utexasville"The author of "Fetchstick of Bovine Armageddon"
(Sorry, I don't have the posts)
>
>
> FUNNIEST POST
Cute!I woud nok al the suf off the shelfs, u fukin cop
>
>
>
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Michael BeckMe. I used to post here about six years ago, but I came back
aboiut 6 months ago.
>
>
> THE MANU TROPHY
What's a MANU?
--
-------------------------
Daryl D. Spillmann
-------------------------
Dylan F. Alexander
}> FUNNIEST POST
}
}Charles Hoequist and Bob Gretta, for their Tech 10-FSU 3-Officials 39
}rantings
I need a specific post.
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <34BE6D3B...@pop.tamu.edux>, "Daryl D. Spillmann"
<dar...@pop.tamu.edux> wrote:
}> THE MANU TROPHY
}
} What's a MANU?
The most annoying creature to ever walk this earth.
Gary McManus
Trent Woodruff wrote:
>
> >Dylan F. Alexander was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>
> >FUNNIEST POST
>
> Fetch Stick of Ohio State Armageddon (or some such...very rough
> approximation) by Clark Moore
>
> (Sorry, I don't have a copy of it...)
>
Man, I don't remember anything. I'm gonna have to wait until everybody
nominates more stuff (off the shelfs).
Gary McManus
Trent Woodruff
>Dylan F. Alexander was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>FUNNIEST POST
Fetch Stick of Ohio State Armageddon (or some such...very rough
approximation) by Clark Moore
(Sorry, I don't have a copy of it...)
Trent
Visit my two GREAT websites!
http://topofthekey.base.org (Sports Ezine)
http://www.bunt.com/~woodruff/welcome.html (Fantasy Baseball League)
Daryl D. Spillmann
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
> In article <34BE6D3B...@pop.tamu.edux>, "Daryl D. Spillmann"
> <dar...@pop.tamu.edux> wrote:
>
> }> THE MANU TROPHY
> }
> } What's a MANU?
>
> The most annoying creature to ever walk this earth.
Ahh. Well then I nominate JEC8686, and Marin.
Charles Hoequist
I second the nomination, as I left it out of my original list.
-c.h.
welcome to the official offseason
Clark Moore
In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>,
dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) wrote:
> BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus--with the BIBEL 5000 top-water plug
MPH--the race-baiter 180 mudcat worm
> BEST BAIT
"Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
1,000,000 went down on the Amistad--MPH
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Steve Casburn
Deke Arndt
> FUNNIEST POST*
Good Old Norman High--Casburn
Wasting Away ("utexasville")--Arndt
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Chris Grovich
Andre Ervin
> THE MANU TROPHY
JEC Phenice 8686
Dr. Kevin Phenice Ankoviak
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
[*--somebody really ought to nominate Casburn's "we didn't stock the
pond"--here are its headers:]
Subject: We Didn't Stock the Pond
From: Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn)
Date: 1997/08/20
Message-ID:
<Casburn.1-ya024080...@nntp.service.ohio-state.edu>
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here are my two nominees for funniest post:
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: "Good Old Norman High" (v1.1)
From: Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn)
Date: 1997/03/29
Message-ID: <Casburn.1-ya023180...@nntp.service.ohio-state.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
As a few people pointed out, the original version of "Good Old Norman
High" had several metrical mishaps and rancid rhythms. Most of these have
been corrected (or replaced by others, equally bad) in version 1.1:
"Good Old Norman High" (or, "The Day the Magic Died")
-----------------------------------------------------
A long, long time ago
I can still remember Oklahoma win with pride
And I knew if my game kicked ass
That I could make some decent cash
And move my parents to a double-wide
Now Sunday mornings make me shiver
With every paper I deliver
Bad news by the gun rack
They lost again to the WAC
And I can't remember if I lied
When I said I still had Sooner pride
But something cut me deep inside
The day...the magic...died
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
"Next year it'll be two and nine"
Do you worship the wishbone?
And do you have faith in that set alone,
If John Walkup tells you so?
Now do you believe in the pitch and roll?
Can the option save the Sooner soul?
And can it bring me back glory days of old?
Now I know that you hate Gary Gibbs
'Cause I saw you laugh when they did him in
You all kicked off your shoes
And drank whiskey 'til you puked -- ewwwww!
He was a lonely, inept sitting duck
With a '90s offense and atrocious luck
And I knew that ol' Gary was fucked
The day...the maaaaaaagic died
I started singin':
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
"Next year it'll be two and nine"
Now for eight years we've been on own
And loss grows thick on a Sooner soul
But that's not how it used to be
When ol' Switzer coached for the Sooner team
With a set he borrowed from UT
And some studs like Jamie and J.C.
Oh, but while Barry was gettin' down
The pressmen saw his shady crown
When Thompson was interned
How could Barry return?
And then Gary read a book on Walsh
And Howie hit the heavy sauce
And now Blake is praising God a lot
That's how...the maaaaagic died!
We were singing...
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
Helter-skelter in the Sooner Swooner
Moore just overthrew another receiver
Eight straight times and climbing fast
The balls kept landing on the grass
Every time he threw a forward pass
At least Schnellie's not on the sidelines getting gassed
No, the halftime air's now sweet perfume
While the band plays Boomer Sooner tunes
The players thought they had a chance
Nooooooo, once *again* they got de-pantsed
When the Sooners went to take the field
The other team refused to yield
Lord, how our weakness was revealed
The day...the maaaaagic died!
We started singin':
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
"Next year it'll be two and nine"
And there we were all in disgrace
What happened to our recruiting base?
Please don't make us start again!
So come on, Blake be nimble, Blake be quick
Blake must out-recruit Mackovic
'Cuz if we can't beat Texas it's his end
Oh how I cried as the Huskers laughed
And swore as they wrote our epitaph
What has the world come to?
They won by fifty-two!
And as the score climbed high into the night
The 'Skers beat Blake and God and right
I saw Goober laughing with delight
The day...the maaaaaaagic died
He was singing:
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
"Next year it'll be two and nine..."
I met a girl who had one tooth
Working at the Sooner ticket booth
One quiet autumn Saturday
Then I walked down to the sacred field
Where I'd seen the 'Skers and Osborne yield
But the man there told me "seven out of eight"
In trailer parks the dogs ran wild
A Doberman ate the Chandler child
And not a shot was fired
As Billy Joe expired
And the three men who gave Bovines fits
Lee Roy, Bud, and the Holy Switz
They shook their heads and called it quits
The day...the magic...died...
And they were singin'...
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
Yeah, they were singin'...
Bye-bye to good old Norman High
Watched the Schooner go to ruin while the old Sooners cried
Them bootlegger boys drank their moonshine and sighed
Whining "next year it'll be two and nine"
Steve
--
Steve Casburn (Casb...@osu.edu)
"Shut up he explained"
-- Ring Lardner, Jr.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Wasting Away ("utexasville")
From: Deke Arndt <dar...@ou.edu>
Date: 1997/11/15
Message-ID: <346D76...@ou.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
With apologies to David Barnes:
Living on Carmex
While UCLA D-Backs
Pick one more TD from our poor QBs arm
They're drumming our sixth string
And I keep applying
Another thick layer of soothing lip balm
Wastin' away again with Brie and Zinfandel
Recollectin' my fourth-and-one call.
Some people claimed that Gary Darnell's to blame
But I know, it's nobody's fault
Don't know the reason
We tried the 4-3 this season
Our linebackers run like Mister Magoo.
My tailback's a beauty
But I'd rather have Flutie
I'll balance this offense to get our team through.
Wastin' away again with Brie and Zinfandel
Try some Ricotta or perhaps Sauvignon
Some people claim that Big DeLoss is to blame
But I know that it could be my fault.
Forty thousand are booing
Everything that we're doing
It's the most noise they've made in ten years.
It's the Bovine tradition
of angry derision.
At least empty seats can't heckle my Steers.
Wastin' away again with Brie and Zinfandel
I like Romano more than Parmesan.
Some people claim that Bobby Jack is to blame
Or they say it's my own damn fault.
They bought out my contract
And they say that the line's stacked
With bright, eager coaches who'll sign as quick as they can.
They're all rising stars.
Hey, Wade Phillips is ours!
Yeah, that Marquee Value is reeling 'em in.
Wastin' away again with Brie and Zinfandel
A fine Cabernet should go well with this balm
30 thousand empty seats claim that this Yankee's to blame
For all I know, it could be my fault.
Yeah, most Bovines claim that Big John is to blame
And I know, I'll be taking the fall.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
Clark Moore
Florida State University
Justin Greenfield
Clark Moore wrote:
>
> > BEST BAIT
> "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
Um, no, that was Todd Gak and RD Mercer. Please check your facts!
Justin G.
Clark Moore
> Man, I don't remember anything. I'm gonna have to wait until everybody
> nominates more stuff (off the shelfs).
>
> Gary McManus
I just did an author profile on the handful of authors most likely to have
spawned the funniest post, and slogged through for about an hour until I
found them. Of course, this technique rules out one-hit wonder posters,
and POYs from unlikely sources, but what is one to do? Next year, maybe
either Dylan or whoever should archive nominated POYs, and repost them for
a week or two before the awards. With [CLASSICS] in the subject line, so
people could filter them out, if so inclined.
Better still, people who are gonna vote should individually archive
whatever posts they find exceptional during the calendar year, and just
search their own directories. I didn't. I probably relied too heavily on
DejaNews.
Also, I note that many of the best posters may gain their standing as the
result of a cumulative effect, rather than a few stellar individual posts.
Among many of my personal choices for best poster, there are few truly
remarkable standalone posts. It's more about consistent than remarkable.
Some of my favorites rely almost solely on follow-ups.
As a search tip, most (not all) of the funnier standalone posts IMO were
between 1/97 and prior to the preseason classics, when there's nothing else
to talk about. Of course, this biases the awards for the regulars, but...
WE NEED A PLAYOFF!!!!
Jim Leahy
: BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus (too many to mention)
Dylan Alexander (anybody who gets a warning from their server has to be
nominated)
: BEST BAIT
My two personal favorites:
"Noter Dame last Catholic Div.1 School?" - David C. Tuttle
"Fat old hack?" - Gary McManus (in alt.elvis.king)
: POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Steve Casburn
Clark Moore
: FUNNIEST POST
"Weather Grid" - Deke Arndt (the lipbalmium post)
"I AM MORON" - Jim Andrews
: NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
If this is meant as a compliment:
Buck Naked
Chris Grovich
If it's meant to indicate an annoying newbie:
Marin
Joe Bugle
: THE MANU TROPHY
gelco
Kevin Ankoviak
May I also suggest a "whither" award?
Bill Burgess
Dr. Death
Jim Leahy
Clark Moore
In article <34BE92...@ou.edu>, Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
> Justin Greenfield wrote:
> >
> > Clark Moore wrote:
> > >
> > > > BEST BAIT
> > > "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
> >
> > Um, no, that was Todd Gak and RD Mercer. Please check your facts!
>
> What part of get some balls and post under your own name do you not
> understand?
Okay, then, whoever of you dirt-eating, inbred, single-wide-dwelling
bastards posted it, I nominate HIM.
Jeez.
:)
Steve Casburn
In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>,
dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) wrote:
>
> BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus
El Goob
> BEST BAIT
That first post to alt.skateboard
"Corn-fed, white-bred, Husker red"
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Clark Moore
Deke Arndt
> FUNNIEST POST
Clark Moore's "Death of the Garnet Battalion"
Clark Moore's "We Don't Belong in the Top 5...not yet..."
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Chris Grovich
> THE MANU TROPHY
That JEC guy
Marin Heiskell
Gary McManus
Clark Moore wrote:
>
> In article <34BE92...@ou.edu>, Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
>
> > Justin Greenfield wrote:
> > >
> > > Clark Moore wrote:
> > > >
> > > > "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
> > >
> >
> > What part of get some balls and post under your own name do you not
> > understand?
>
> Okay, then, whoever of you dirt-eating, inbred, single-wide-dwelling
> bastards posted it, I nominate HIM.
>
> Jeez.
DEER LORD!!! I do'nt eat dirt!
Gary McManus
Chris Metzler
In article <34be5a11...@snews.zippo.com> wood...@bunt.com (Trent Woodruff) writes:
>>Dylan F. Alexander was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>
>>FUNNIEST POST
>
>Fetch Stick of Ohio State Armageddon (or some such...very rough
>approximation) by Clark Moore
>
>(Sorry, I don't have a copy of it...)
That was Casburn, I thought. Or do you mean a followup?
-c
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
Barney must be destroyed.
Mike Coffey
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
> BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus
Goob (obvious reasons)
Ted Smith
Tod Gak
>
> BEST BAIT
Noter Dame last Catholic Div.1 School? (ditto)
that "Northwestern is in the Big 10 get your facts straight" thing from
the last week or so (dammit, can't remember the title -- I'll try to dig
it up if you don't know the one I'm talking about -- anyone else
remember it?)
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
whoever wrote "Utexasville" -- gotta save the good stuff next year for
easier reference
me (hey, I thought "Song Sung Black" was pretty funny)
> THE MANU TROPHY
JEC8686
Michael Beck
What about the Heiskell trophy (if there is such an animal)? And will
there still be a Top 25 list?
--
Mike Coffey
ND '91
"I have determined that the path to world domination does not include a
career as a street performer."
"That's funny ... it worked for Shields and Yarnell."
Czar Christopher Phenice I
Chris Metzler <met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu> wrote:
> In article <34be5a11...@snews.zippo.com> wood...@bunt.com (Trent Woodruff) writes:
>>>Dylan F. Alexander was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>>
>>>FUNNIEST POST
>>
>>Fetch Stick of Ohio State Armageddon (or some such...very rough
>>approximation) by Clark Moore
>>
>>(Sorry, I don't have a copy of it...)
>
> That was Casburn, I thought. Or do you mean a followup?
It was a Fetch Stick of *Bovine* Armageddon, and Clark wrote it
in order to demonstrate what a mediocre woofer I am.
--CCI
(like you couldn't tell already)
Czar Christopher Phenice I
Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
> Clark Moore wrote:
>>
>> In article <34BE92...@ou.edu>, Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
>>
>> > Justin Greenfield wrote:
>> > >
>> > > Clark Moore wrote:
>> > > >
>> > > > "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
>> > >
>> >
>> > What part of get some balls and post under your own name do you not
>> > understand?
>>
>> Okay, then, whoever of you dirt-eating, inbred, single-wide-dwelling
>> bastards posted it, I nominate HIM.
>>
>> Jeez.
>
> DEER LORD!!! I do'nt eat dirt!
...And when there was no crawdads, we ate sand.
--CCI
Dave Becker
> BEST FISHERMAN
McManus
> BEST BAIT
1,000,000, men on Amistad (by ME!) [post attached]
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Clark Moore
> FUNNIEST POST
Rooney Roolz[post attached]
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Buck Naked
> THE MANU TROPHY
JEC...
==============================================================================
Maximilian Waugh wrote:
>
> On Mon, 16 Jun 1997, Thomas Rooney wrote:
>
> > > Hell, the average band member with your academic credentials would have
> >
> >
> >
> > Geez you idiot at least bandpeople know how to spell "acedemic".
>
> I'm assuming you're not a band person then...
Sure *WAS*. I played the triangle in the Pride of Nebraska UoNMB. I
played the trumpet for two years until chronic chapped lips (runs in the
family) finally caught up with me and forced me to switch to the
triangle. Geez, I must have went through a case of lip balm a day trying
to hang on to my beloved trumpet. I loved to blast, and it's tough to
blast with a triangle (ha ha).
That's life, though. Just gotta roll with the ol' punches.
------------------------------
Tommy Rooney/NU '91
"We were searching for something original, something earth-shatteringly
new. That's when it dawned on us to play "On Broadway" over and over
again!"
-Bob Sacamano, University of Nebraska Marching Band Director,
September, 1990
--------------------------------
==============================================================================
Mon, 08 Dec 1997 20:10:02 -0700 Marin Phenice Heiskell wrote:
>
> NO, it's called research. (And I took a history class that focused on
> slavery) If you actually do some READING on the
> estimated 400 years of the enslavement of black people, it calculated the
> death toll somewhere around 450 million. Sorry to disappoint you, but
> more than just a hundred or so were killed.
>
And if you don't feel like reading, wait for the movie. At least a
million men went down when the Amistad sunk.
Dave
==============================================================================
Dave
Mike Warren
>BEST FISHERMAN
>
>
>
>BEST BAIT
>
>
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
>
Pride of South Moore
>
>
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>
>
>THE MANU TROPHY
Michael Beck / Marin
Mathews J. Thundyil
Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
>Here's nomination form for this year's (much smaller) Awards.
>must be _posted, not emailed_ under this thread. Final voting
>will be emailed and confidential.
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus -
Marin
>
>BEST BAIT
Anime=Big Eyed Cartoons - was it Gary?
McManus - The impersonation of (?) initially from utexas.edu, then from
the rest of the big 12 schools - right at the beginning of the
season. Most of the old loyals were hooked. I think harp asked
her out on a date.
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Casburn - Old Norman High
Deke - utexasville?
>FUNNIEST POST
I thought these threads were kinda cool.
Pride of South Moore Thread - whoever started it.
The Enis thread at the start of the season - predictable stuff, but enjoyable
(...its not the size of Enis, but how you use it... etc)
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
JEC666 or whatever.
Mike&Christy Todd
(Interesting that they are both Husker fans)
>THE MANU TROPHY
Ted Smith
Marin Heiskell
Does Deke's "An Okie Christmas..." get nominated for something?
There should be a "CUTE" trophy for comments like
Where has the magic gone - Indeed!
30-27
Dude, don't be a d**k
Hi.
What part of ... don't you understand.
Matt Thundyil
Czar Christopher Phenice I
Dylan F. Alexander
In article
<REMOVEFORMAILjleah...@lat1mac39.cchem.berkeley.edu>,
REMOVEFOR...@socrates.berkeley.edu (Jim Leahy) wrote:
}In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>,
}dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) wrote:
}
}: BEST FISHERMAN
}
}Gary McManus (too many to mention)
}Dylan Alexander (anybody who gets a warning from their server has to be
}nominated)
I had to go in again today because some anime loser whined about
my one post a couple of weeks ago.
Dylan F. Alexander
}And will there still be a Top 25 list?
Yes.
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <69mcuk$a...@piglet.cc.utexas.edu>, ma...@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu
(Mathews J. Thundyil) wrote:
}Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
}>BEST BAIT
}
}Anime=Big Eyed Cartoons - was it Gary?
I think so.
Mike Coffey
FUNNIEST POST
Pride of South Moore.
Chris Grovich
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>BEST FISHERMAN
> Ted Smith
> "Marin Phenice Heiskell"
>BEST BAIT
> Christopher Koontz -- "Manning hospitalization fraud exposed!"
> Steve Casburn -- "PENN STATE GETS ROBBED AGAIN!!!"
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
>FUNNIEST POST
> John Walkup -- CU and ND Fans, Act Now! You Don't Want
> to Miss Out!!
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>
>THE MANU TROPHY
I have to ask since I've only been here for about a year...
What the hell is it?
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
From: iy...@jove.acs.unt.edu (Koontz Christopher Noel)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Manning hospitalization fraud exposed!
Date: 16 Dec 1997 17:07:06 GMT
Organization: University of North Texas
KNOXVILLE, TN -- FOOTBALL PLAYER BEATEN BY FATHER
12/16/97
University of Tennessee quarterback Peyton Manning was
hospitalized early last night as the result of a severe beating by his
father, former NFL quarterback Archie Manning, said sources in
Knoxville early Tuesday. Announcements made previously that the younger
Manning's ailments were linked to a viral infection are untrue, sources
said.
"That son-of-a-bitch can't do anything right. He ain't nothing
more than a Heath Shuler starter kit," the elder Manning, a former New
Orleans Saint, reportedly said to police investigators while drinking a
case of Jax beer in a Knoxville bar on Monday night. "I didn't fail in
the NFL because I didn't try, and I thought I taught that little bastard
that."
"That's why his teeth are so rotten. I never took him to the
dentist because if he was trying hard enough, they all would have gotten
knocked out by linebackers and I would have bought him new ones. No
wonder
he can't beat that visor-wearing sissy, let alone win the Heisman."
"That's why I had to smack him up good, (to) scatter those teeth
on the floor like Chicklets."
No charges have yet been filed by police, as further
investigations continue. The younger Manning, heavily guarded by
police, has been unavailable for comment, but is reportedly in a
comatose state, periodically awakening to repeat the term "North Coast
media bias."
The younger Manning was a much-heralded contender for the
Heisman trophy, awarded each year to the best college football player.
The award was won by Charles Woodson of the University of Michigan.
=-=-=-=-=-=-==-
From: Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: PENN STATE GETS ROBBED AGAIN!!!!!
Date: Sun, 19 Oct 1997 01:22:24 -0500
Organization: *The* Ohio State University
THIS SUCKS!!!!!
Remember back in '94 when Penn State was passed by Nebraska in the
polls after giving up two garbage-time TDs to Indiana that made a
blowout win seem close because the final score was so close and the
pollsters were fooled?
Well, DAMN IT, JoePa never learns, does he? Once again, with the
game in hand against Minnesota, he watches impassively as the
second-string D gives up two late TDs to turn a comfortable 16-0 win
into a seemingly competitive 16-15 one. Now it's almost a sure bet that
either Nebraska or Florida State will hurdle PSU into the #1 spot in the
polls.
I'm telling you, JoePa is never going to win another national
championship unless he learns to RUTS, RUTS, RUTS! Maybe Paterno needs
to get rid of the deadwood on his staff and hire some people who know
what it takes. I heard Doug Graber is available...
Steve
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
From: Deke Arndt <dar...@ou.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Spurrier, please fuck off
Date: Mon, 01 Dec 1997 12:14:46 -0600
Organization: Society to Prevent Continental Drift
Dustin Christmann wrote:
> Well, thanx, but I am bummed about the direction that the UT football
> program is going, i.e. nowhere. And frankly, I'm convinced that the
> firing of the Lip Balm Fiend had less to do with on-field performance
> than it did with a few rich alumni putting the screws to the athletic
> department to get rid of a man that didn't play THEIR game.
> Why is there this talk of Texas having such a great program? The last
> MNC we won was in 1970.
>We're the U$C of the Southwest, a once-proud program that is slowly
>being relegated to relevance only in the history books, and what bums
>me out is that our fat-cat alumni either fail to see, or choose not to
>see, that the game is different than it was in 1970, and that too many
>of the "average" alumni are too willing to give them popular support.
> He would never be a great coach, but firing John Mackovic solves much
> fewer problems than Texas Fan Conventional Wisdom thinks.
Welcome to Hell. Chips are over there. Coke break is at 2 o'clock.
You'll need to sign in over there, next to the "WELCOME TIDE ALUMNI"
table. Don't listen to the Noter Dame fans, they all think this is a
temporary thing.
Here's the film schedule for today:
6 am: NOTER DAME, 1997. (replaces NOTER DAME, 1977)
7 am: TEXAS, 1997. (replaces TEXAS, 1976)
8 am: OKLAHOMA, off-season 1995. (replaces "SOONER FAMILY")
9 am: GREAT EXPECTATIONS (a bio of "prominent alumni")
10am: GETTING ASS KICKED BY YOUR STATE'S AG SCHOOL (Purdue included)
11am: FREDDIE KITCHENS, a bio (replaces JOE NAMATH, a bio)
noon: WATCH JIMMY JOHNSON CELEBRATE (one-hour director's cut)
1 pm: WATCH TERRY BOWDEN CELEBRATE SHAMELESSLY
2 pm: Coke Break
3 pm: OKLAHOMA, THE POST-SWITZER YEARS
4 pm: ND's LAST-SECOND FG AGAINST U$C IN 1996, a reprise
(U$C fans will be treated to "O.J.'s POST-FOOTBALL DAYS")
5 pm: PEP TALK: The impending re-birth of Miami football
6 pm: LIP-BALM AND YOU, a one hour documentary
7 pm: GETTING ASS KICKED BY YOUR STATE'S AG SCHOOL (repeat)
8 pm: ROBO-COACH: THE SECOND COMING.
9 pm: THE BALANCED OFFENSE, A RETROSPECTIVE
10pm: BEDTIME STORIES (read by "prominent alumni")
HANTA YO,
Deke
=-=-=-=-=-=-=
From: wal...@dimension.nhn.uoknor.edu (John Walkup)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: CU and ND Fans, Act Now! You Don't Want to Miss Out!!
Dear fellow college football fans,
You know the story. Your team shows up at the big game and
the opposition has one of them fancy pro-set offenses. And
here you are stuck with one of those OLD FASHIONED, option
style attacks. Oh, the embarassment!
But we can help! Give us a call, and we can install one of those
shiny new pro-style offenses in just minutes. No more
embarrassments. No more snide commments from former pro
coaches. You can stand up proud as you see your new team
take the field with a new SUPER-SOPHISTICATED attack,
JUST LIKE THE PROS DO IT!
Here's how it works. You send us your OLD, ANTIQUATED,
and OBSOLETE option offense and we will send you a NEW PRO-STYLE
offense for only $5.95! (FREE for Nebraska residents.)
What a deal! It even comes with a complete coaching staff, ready
to exhibit the latest wonders of coaching philosophy. Also
included is a playbook, a 15 VOLUME SET. What a value!
You will be able to show off to your friends...
1. Muffed punts!
2. Confused signals!
3. Errant passes!
4. Penalties GALORE!!!!
Don't take my word for it! Listen to these fellow (and former) football
coaches!
"With the new pro-style offense, we doubled our number of blown
passing routes in ONLY THREE WEEKS."
- Gary Gibbs, Norman OK
"Thanks to this new offer we're the talk of the town!"
- Gary Nord, Norman OK
"The pro-set has allowed us to recruit the best quarterback
ever in college football. We may win another FOUR HEISMANS!
I just know the coaches of Army and Navy looked at us in envy."
- Lou "Out of Here" Holtz, South Bend IN
"When we ran the wishbone, people accused us of being a football
factory. Since we installed the pro-set, our academic image has
blossomed. And we now have quarterbacks I JUST TREASURE."
- Rick "Loafer Lite" Newbisexual, Boulder CO
"When we ran the wishbone, we couldn't beat Miami in the Orange Bowl.
Since OU installed the pro-set, we haven't even HAD to play in the
Orange Bowl. I sure wish I had this offer when *I* coached.
- Barry "GOD" Switzer, Norman OK
__________________________________________________________________
Just send $5.95 to
Upper-Crust Offenses
Athletic Department
University of Oklahoma
Norman, OK 73445
Sorry, we cannot ship to Texas.
If you want the coaching staff, select either U-Haul or Ryder shipping.
Note: Naturally, all offensive strategies have some risk involved.
We cannot guarantee that you will ever win again.
Gary McManus
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
>
> In article <69mcuk$a...@piglet.cc.utexas.edu>, ma...@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu
> (Mathews J. Thundyil) wrote:
>
> }Dylan F. Alexander <dy...@tamu.edu> wrote:
> }>BEST BAIT
> }
> }Anime=Big Eyed Cartoons - was it Gary?
>
> I think so.
>
Um, no, what part of "you" do you not understand?
Gary McManus
James Gibson
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> BEST FISHERMAN
Brian Saunders
>
> BEST BAIT
G8torfan - Florida #1
>
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Steve Casburn
>
> FUNNIEST POST
>
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
JEC8686
>
> THE MANU TROPHY
--
James Gibson - Grad Student, Penn State - jx...@psu.edu
Visit my New Mexico Lobos Men's Basketball Web Page at:
http://www.personal.psu.edu/jxg22/lobos/main.html
for updates & commentary on the Lobos & the WAC Mountain.
Chris Metzler
In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu> dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) writes:
>
>BEST FISHERMAN
Marin Phenice Heiskell
(no other nomination comes close)
>BEST BAIT
"Over one million people went down with the Amistad ALONE!", by
Marin Phenice Heiskell
(caught Daryl D. Spillman, Burke Cox, Trent Woodruff, Jack Heraty,
Karl Allen, and S.A. -- see attached #1)
"An SEC team? Dude, F$U used to beat UNL like a rented mule," by
Chris Grovich. (I was surprised at the number of people who
felt the need to correct Chris, and tell him that FSU was in
fact in the SEC, including Dale.)
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Mike Coffey (for his adaptation of the Kinks' "Lola", "Song Sung Affirmative";
see attached #2)
Trent Woodruff ("Brook chose to fly; Brook chose to die.")
>FUNNIEST POST
Jon Russell, in the thread "Florida State mascot," inquiring as to the
*type* of flute played by Marin in her band (see attached #3).
Steve Casburn, for "The Fetch Stick of Buckeye Armageddon" (with the
great quote "You Okie meteorologists who think you know what hell
is like are a bunch of Billy Ray Cyri to my Johnny Cash." -- see
attached #4.)
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
(although I've posted in this group before, this is the first time I've
hung out here more than a week, which makes me a newbie I would presume.
so, I'd consider myself too ignorant to nominate anyone.)
>THE MANU TROPHY
JEC8686
Dr. Kevin Ankoviak
----- begin included article #1
Subject: Re: Pride of the South
From: Marin Phenice Heiskell <heis...@leland.Stanford.EDU>
Date: 1997/12/10
Message-ID: <Pine.GSO.3.96.971210...@saga14.Stanford.EDU>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
On 10 Dec 1997, Karl Allen wrote:
> In article <Pine.GSO.3.96.97121...@saga12.Stanford.EDU>
> Marin Phenice Heiskell <heis...@leland.Stanford.EDU> writes:
[ snip ]
> >(Over one million people went down with the Amistad ALONE!)
>
> When you say "went down", do you mean "were transported by" or "died when
> it sunk"? If you're claiming that a million people were able to fit on
> a 19th century ship I begin to understand how you could think 450 million
> deaths is a plausible figure.
>
>
When I say "went down", I mean died when it sunk.
And that number is in the history books. And yes, if you have a HUGE
ship (I used to know the measurements, but I'll have to get back to you
on that), make people who are tightly chained together lay down flat side
by side and stack them on top of one
another until the ship is full, you can fit a hell of a lot of people on
there.
----- end included article #1
----- begin included article #2
Subject: If the Kinks only knew....
From: Mike Coffey <theco...@ibm.net>
Date: 1997/12/12
Message-ID: <3490D7E9...@ibm.net>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Song Sung Affirmative
---------------------
(to the tune of "Lola")
Browsing through the posts on the Internet
when I came across one that I really thought
was a buzzkill.
B-U-Z-Z Buzzkill.
I scrolled to the top just to check out the name
(cuz' I thought to myself "Cripes, this person's insane"):
the screen said "Heiskell".
H-E-I-S Heiskell.
Marin Phrenice Heiskell.
(BA-DA-DA-DUM DA-DUM DAAAAA)
"Hey, all you Klansmen in r.s.f.c,
I'm a angry black woman. Can you deal with me?
My name is Heiskell.
Marin Phrenice Heiskell."
"The crowd here at Stanford is a sorry show:
too many whites and Asians (they hate blacks, you know).
Not enough Heiskells.
Marin Phrenice Heiskells."
"Well, I lived in lily neighborhoods and went to their schools
but I think they're all racists and that black people rule.
Gonna see Amistad, though it might make me hide,
'cause I want to learn about the million people who died."
"The landlords and the bosses always treat me rude,
and it's 'cause of my color, not my poor attitude.
Unfair to Heiskell.
Marin Phrenice Heiskell."
The folks in the group were quite taken aback,
until one of them said "Hell, she ain't even black,
are you, Heiskell?
Marin Phrenice Heiskell?"
Well she said, "Goddammit, now you've made me sore.
Have you never seen a black Stanford student before?
I bet you hate AA and are a racist pig.
Now sit back and relax and read my 20-line sig."
I've had all I can stands, I can't stands no more.
So now "Pride of the South" is set to IGNORE.
Say bye-bye, Heiskell.
Marin Phrenice Heiskell.
Marin Phrenice Heiskell.
(repeat ad nauseum)
----- end included article #2
----- begin included article #3
Subject: Re: Florida State mascot
From: russ...@tc.umn.edu (Jon Russell)
Date: 1997/11/15
Message-ID: <64khj9$k...@news1.zippo.com>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Marin Phenice Heiskell <heis...@leland.Stanford.EDU> wrote:
>When I was in the band when I was younger, I played the flute.
Skin?
Jon Russell
Chicago 86
Minnesotans for Nebraska tCoV (TM)
----- end included article #3
----- begin included article #4
Subject: The Fetch Stick of Buckeye Armageddon
From: Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn)
Date: 1998/01/02
Message-ID: <Casburn.1-ya024080...@nntp.service.ohio-state.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
BIIIIIIIITE MEEEEEEEEEE, CLARK MOORE!
Here's my day from hell:
1. Wisconsin gets demolished by Georgia
2. Penn State gets handled by Florida
3. A friend of mine, a woman who I have spent the last five years
kidding myself into thinking that she might fall for me some day, told me
emphatically that, no, that was never going to happen
4. I then had to spend another hour with her, when what I really
wanted to do was dunk my face in a bucket of cold water
5. I felt compelled to root wholeheartedly for Michigan in the Rose Bowl
6. Michigan won the game in a way that guarantees that whiny Husker
fans will bitch and moan on r.s.f.c. for *months*
7. Ohio State got steamrolled by Florida State
You Okie meteorologists who think you know what hell is like are a
bunch of Billy Ray Cyri to my Johnny Cash.
Steve
...actually, I think the day would have been bearable had it not been
for #3...
--
Steve Casburn (Casb...@osu.edu)
"Shut up he explained"
-- Ring Lardner, Jr.
----- end included article #4
Chris Metzler
Chris Grovich
Now that I know what exactly it is...
MANU TROPHY
JEC1234AOL
World Famous Joe Bugle (for that .sig alone)
---
Chris Grovich - President
Pennsylvanians Against the Big Ten
http://www.personal.psu.edu/cxg202
Chris Metzler
In article <69mnc8$en8$1...@excalibur.flash.net> Czar Christopher Phenice I <cbel...@flash.net> writes:
Love that movie.
-c
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
". . .one day, I decided to get my own crawdad . . ."
Jason Henning
+ > FUNNIEST POST
Subject: Penn State fans go on cleaning spree
From: Brian Wright <bwr...@cheme.cornell.edu>
Date: 1997/10/20
(AP) STATE COLLEGE STATION, PA - Minutes after the release of the AP and
Coaches polls, Penn State fans took the streets. They uprighted windblown
trailers, cleaned the streets, picked up litter, painted over grafitti,
and even helped old ladies cross the streets. All to the shouts of "We're
#2"!
"Look at this mess!" said Sargeant Richard Whithers of the the Campus
Police. "It'll take days for people to dirty all of this up again."
"You know, I don't mind when people mourn over being dropped in the polls,
but this is just going too far."
"Well, at first it was kinda fun," added Freshman Chip Dahmus, "you know,
going with the crowd, picking up some cups and stuff. But then it just
got out of hand. I even saw some people cleaning cars in the parking lot.
It makes me embarassed to be a Nittany Lion."
Campus Police made one final stand at the practice field, but the weight
of the crowd was too much for them and their pepper spray. The crowd
burst through the gates, replanted goal posts and re-landscaped the flower
beds.
"Just sickening," added Sgt. Whithers.
Chris Metzler
In article <69k1r2$t...@r02n01.cac.psu.edu> cgro...@psu.edu (Chris Grovich) writes:
[ snip ]
>>FUNNIEST POST
>> Deke Arndt -- Hell movie schedule
Oooh, forgot about this one. This was a good nomination.
-c
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
"As a child I understood how to give; I have forgotten this grace since I
have become civilized." - Chief Luther Standing Bear
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <69k1r2$t...@r02n01.cac.psu.edu>, cgro...@psu.edu (Chris
Grovich) wrote:
}>THE MANU TROPHY
}
} I have to ask since I've only been here for about a year...
} What the hell is it?
Manu is the most annoying, worthless, and despicable person to
ever grace this group. He's a blind, obsessed CU fan who accuses
Osborne of cheating every other game and actually believes his
crap, which along with his complete lack of style separates him
from Ted.
The Manu Trophy is intended for the individual who best emobodies
the spirit of Manu. I personally chose my nominees, Sadow and Zecker,
because I find them fairly annoying, overly obsessed and willfully
ignorant when anything that puts their team or conference in a bad
light is discussed.
In Sadow's defense, I suspect he's mostly joking and even considered
him for a Best Fisherman nomination.
Dylan F. Alexander
"ou"
Gary McManus
> BEST FISHERMAN
>
Dylan
>
> BEST BAIT
>
Dylan's Big-eyed cartoons
>
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
Deke
Casboorn
> FUNNIEST POST
>
Thomas Rooney (Blake's lactation) (attachment #1)
>
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Grovich
Andre
>
> THE MANU TROPHY
DR. G/Joe Bugle (AARRGH!!!)
************
Attachment #1:
Subject: Scary Scene In Norman
From: Thomas Rooney <gel...@concentric.net>
Date: 1997/09/27
Message-ID: <342D93...@concentric.net>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
Tonight I saw the most disgusting thing I've ever seen on television.
I was clicking around the channels trying to find a game to watch and I
came across the OU/Louisville game. It was late in the fourth quarter
and Oklahoma was running out the clock on a victory. It was an enjoyable
game to watch and everything was fine until the camera cut to a shot of
Sooner coach John Blake on the sideline. His shirt was covered in
wetness. He was drenched, I mean he was absolutely soaking wet. At first
I thought it must be raining in Norman, but nobody else was wet.
Then I realized what had happened...John Blake was lactating. OH DEER
LORD I screamed as I quickly changed the channel. HAS HE NO SHAME? I
thought to myself as the sight of his large lactating breasts burned
into my brain.
I have standards, people. Television once was a place where a man could
relax and take a break from the daily grind, maybe catch a ballgame or
watch a rerun of the Osmond Family in "Goin' Coconuts!". I certainly
do'nt expect to see the horrrrrrah that I saw tonight. That man has
gone too far.
--------------------------
Tommy Rooney/NU '91
**************
Jim Roberts-Miller
In article <Casburn.1-ya024080...@newsstand.acs.ohio-state.edu>, Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn) wrote:
>> FUNNIEST POST
"I HATE ALABAMA!!!" whoever that guy was.
>> THE MANU TROPHY
>
> That JEC guy
> Marin Heiskell
>
Yes.
Jammer Jim Roberts-Miller
--
Texas A&M University '89,'91
"It's time to become cynical about cynicism. Some ideals really are
worthwhile." -- Travis Porco
Mike Dahmus
In <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I <cbel...@flash.net> writes:
>I have a category nomination.
>
>Clark mentioned rsfc'ers whose contributions are typically of the
>quick-hit followup variety. None of their posts are individually
>worthy of Post of the Year, but cumulatively their contribution
>is worth mention.
>
>Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
>might be appropriate.
>
>As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
>offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
>inate Mike Dahmus.
>
>Hey, that reminds me: Dahmus should present an Aggie of the Year
>award.
Dahmus should write a freakin' cron job so he doesn't continue to forget to
give out Aggie of the Week awards 95% of the weeks of the year. Dahmus is
going to do that right now.
Dahmus just did it. Dahmus shouldn't forget many AotW's from here on out,
as Dahmus will be reminded on the 1st, 5th, 10th, 16th, 20th, 25th, and 30th
of every month to do so. (Dahmus picked the 16th so the script will pop up
in one minute so Dahmus can see if the thing actually works).
Dahmus loves REXX. Dahmus is enjoying a delicious bagel right now while
thinking about more things Dahmus could do with REXX. Dahmus is still
shivering from riding into work today with the top down even though Dahmus
was wearing a jacket because it was still pretty cold although Dahmus should
be able to play basketball at lunch today which will be good because there's
a lot more of Dahmus than there should be at this point in time.
---
Mike Dahmus http://www.io.com/~mdahmus/
Java for OS/2 Development Disclaimer: Not an official IBM spokesman
Mike Dahmus
In <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I <cbel...@flash.net> writes:
>I have a category nomination.
>
>Clark mentioned rsfc'ers whose contributions are typically of the
>quick-hit followup variety. None of their posts are individually
>worthy of Post of the Year, but cumulatively their contribution
>is worth mention.
>
>Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
>might be appropriate.
>
>As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
>offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
>inate Mike Dahmus.
Well, thanky. In return, I can't believe there's not some kind of award given
for simply provoking a post containing the phrase "fetch-stick of bovine
armageddon". Should count as an assist in the RSFC statistics at least.
>Hey, that reminds me: Dahmus should present an Aggie of the Year
>award.
I'll get on it. The script worked, so now every few days I'll see a little
OS/2 window telling me to get off my ass and give out an AotW.
Czar Christopher Phenice I
I have a category nomination.
Clark mentioned rsfc'ers whose contributions are typically of the
quick-hit followup variety. None of their posts are individually
worthy of Post of the Year, but cumulatively their contribution
is worth mention.
Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
might be appropriate.
As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
inate Mike Dahmus.
Hey, that reminds me: Dahmus should present an Aggie of the Year
award.
--CCPI
Scott Harper
In article <69mcuk$a...@piglet.cc.utexas.edu>, ma...@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (Mathews J. Thundyil) wrote:
>McManus - The impersonation of (?) initially from utexas.edu, then from
> the rest of the big 12 schools - right at the beginning of the
> season. Most of the old loyals were hooked. I think harp asked
> her out on a date.
You mean that was bait??? Damn. I am SO gullible.
harp
austin,tx
R. Kelley Cook
On Wed, 14 Jan 1998 20:09:15 -0600, Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
>Here's nomination form for this year's (much smaller) Awards.
>You may nominate two people for each award. All nominations
>must be _posted, not emailed_ under this thread. Final voting
>will be emailed and confidential.
>
>Roughly the top 5 vote getters during the nomination period
>(probably a week) will be on the final ballot. I'll look
>for natural breaks in the number of nominations. [Ex. If
>the top four people get 5-7 nominations each and the fifth
>guy gets 2, he's not going on the final ballot.]
>
>List your one or two nominees under each title. Cut out the
>rest from your reply, please.
>
>IMPORTANT NOTE: Nominations for a Best Post category should
>include the author, the gist of the post, and the full text
>should be posted if no one else had done it yet and you happen
>to have a copy.
>
>Cut here when you reply.
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>BEST FISHERMAN
>
Theodore Smith
Marin =)
>
>BEST BAIT
>
>
--------------
Subject: Noter Dame last Catholic Div1 school???
From: d...@odin.mdacc.tmc.edu (David C. Tuttle)
Date: 1997/11/07
Message-ID: <dct-071197...@nidhogg.mdacc.tmc.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
I just heard that Boston College is dropping football after this
year. Noter Dame's gotta be happy about that -- they'll corner
the Catholic HS football player market now.
I also heard that the BC players are so upset theyr'e covering the
logo on their helmets with duck tape for the rest of the season!
----------------
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
Steve Casburn
>
>FUNNIEST POST
Pride of South Moore
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>
>THE MANU TROPHY
y-sch...@nwu.edu -- The purple dream is no longer
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I
<cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
Both proposals are accepted.
Trent Woodruff
>Chris Metzler was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>Trent Woodruff ("Brook chose to fly; Brook chose to die.")
Uh...wow.
(Hey to Goob! <wild, maniacal laughter>)
Trent
Visit my two GREAT websites!
http://topofthekey.base.org (Sports Ezine)
http://www.bunt.com/~woodruff/welcome.html (Fantasy Baseball League)
Jim Leahy
: I had to go in again today because some anime loser whined about
: my one post a couple of weeks ago.
You rule, dude. I mean that in the nicest possible way.
Jim Leahy (maybe you should set up a weekly appointment...)
Clark Moore
> In article <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I
> <cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
>
> }I have a category nomination.
> }
> }Clark mentioned rsfc'ers whose contributions are typically of the
> }quick-hit followup variety. None of their posts are individually
> }worthy of Post of the Year, but cumulatively their contribution
> }is worth mention.
> }
> }Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
> }might be appropriate.
> }
> }As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
> }offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
> }inate Mike Dahmus.
> }
> }Hey, that reminds me: Dahmus should present an Aggie of the Year
> }award.
>
> Both proposals are accepted.
For this as-yet-unnamed award, I'll go ahead and nominate Czar Christopher
Phenice I, and Trent Phenice Woodruff.
--
Clark "Hooked on Phenices" Moore
Phenice State University
Mike Coffey
Dylan F. Alexander wrote:
> }Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
> }might be appropriate.
McManus
htimS werdnA Phonics
--
Mike Coffey, ND '91 (remove spamsux to reply)
"Hey, guys! Sally Struthers is hiding food from us!!"
Mark Allen
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>BEST FISHERMAN
Marin
Dahmus (by way of having hooked my lip a few...)
>BEST BAIT
Crawdads
>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Who wrote "If it moos, it will loose..."? (Was that Clark?)
>FUNNIEST POST
"Time Line of Annoying Shit"
--Deke Arndt
Comedy combined with good, solid information and analysis...
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
dre
Grovich
>THE MANU TROPHY
JEC1234AOL
Patrick "u so wrong" Tong
Subject: Time Line of Annoying ShitFrom: Deke Arndt
<dar...@ou.edu>
Date: 1997/02/10Message-ID: <32FF9B...@ou.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college[More Headers][Ken Gilbert wrote:
(The "Redmen" verdict is in...)> RedHawks--one word, no space. PUUUUKE.
Amen. Can anybody say "Continental Basketball Association"? How
about "International Hockey League"?
"RedHawks". I don't think the USFL would have done something this
nauseating.
Speaking of which, is the 80s-90s trend of selecting groovy
descriptive nicknames which don't have a normal plural (a la "Heat",
"Fire", "Cavalry" [an OKC fav], etc.) over?
If it is over, great. But if it is being replaced by the neuvo-trend
of splicing two words/segments together to form a single nickname
which resembles a C++ variable (e.g., "WindBirds", "GayNames",
"LipBalmers", etc...), then I'm going on a nine-state littering rampage.
Man, this SUCKS. Off-season sucks.
Here is my NonScientific TimeLine of Annoying NameConventions:
Late 19th/Early 20th Century:
People have the depth and imagination of lint. Names such as
"Crimson" and "Whites" are chosen. Some pioneering dolts
discover descriptive adjectives such as "Big" and "Fighting"
to add to colors. This is progress.
World War One -ish: The Golden Years of Collegiate Nicknames.
High-quality regional descriptors such as "Cornhuskers",
"Hurricanes", "Buckeyes", and (gag) "Longhorns" come to prominence.
Nicknames tell something about the school/state/city's heritage
and mission. Even in the midst of all of this progress, a bunch
of visionless dweebs stick to names derived from undomesticated
felines. Bullshit monikers such as "Cougars", "Wildcats",
"Bears", and "Eagles" spread like the plague.
Equally hopeless nimrods think the addition of the word
"Golden" to any animals name makes a nickname unique and
successful. They fail miserably.WWI - WWII:
Professional franchises are crafting delightful nicknames,
such as "Steelers", "Celtics", and "Senators".1960s-1970s:
Saturation is reached. Creativity and insight falls victim to
the "Let's do anything to make our name unique and modern"
realm of thought. The New Orleans Jazz are introduced, and
should be considered the nickname scourge of all-time. A few
fruity liberal-types note how the name "Jazz" implies that
the team is one functional unit. This landmark nickname
came nearly two decades before the orgy entitled "Really Bad
Nicknames But At Least They Don't End With The Letter 'S'"1980s:
The afore-mentioned orgy is in full-swing. It lasts 10+ years.
Late 80s/Early 90s: A bunch of squirrely architects and pencil-pushing
dweebs
decide that "nostalgia" means "Stupid-sounding names that,
by their total simplicity and lack of any thought, remind of
of days past." It is especially noted in baseball-nostalgia
freaks. Abominations such as "Oriole Park at Camden Yards"
and "The Ballpark at Arlington" surface.Early 1990s:
The Thought police decide that any nickname/mascot which
present certain ethnicities are incorrect and traditional
names are tossed out. "Golden Eagles" seems to be the
replacement of choice. In a sidelight, any nicknames which
depict the warlike nature of caucasoids are also scrapped
in favor of "Golden Eagles".Mid 1990s:
Nicknames become amalgamations of short, stupid words.
"Devil Rays" is actually a professional franchise nickname.
The most hideous trend os the smashing together of these
words into one word, with two or more capital letters.PROGNOSIS FOR THE
FUTURE:
In less than 20 years, all athletic teams will have the same
faggy nicknames as those seen in the last 40 years of professional soccer.
Boomer Sooner,Deke
P.S. No offense toward any social, ethnic, or lifestyle-specific
groups was intended. I'm a nice guy. Really.(Really.)
Clark Moore
In article <69ovv2$94t$1...@newsfep4.sprintmail.com>, "Mark Allen"
<mal...@mcfadden-sales.com> wrote:
> >POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
> Who wrote "If it moos, it will loose..."? (Was that Clark?)
Yeah, that was my dual prediction of the UNL-CU and UT-aTm games.
One of my better Pickem weeks (hey to my abysmal performances in EBEPEC,
3SICK3M, CFPOOL, and Big 12), as it turned out.
Creatively, the B12 was some pretty fertile ground, giving me both the
Fetch Stick of Bovine Armageddon, and the moo thing. And a few of Deke's
best posts of the year, Steve Casburn's POY, and some of the best running
schtick in rsfc history (or at least the ~~10 years that I've observed).
Plus Blake lactation, tCoV, lost and found magic...I think it's obvious
that this conference had the highest rsfc literary value, hands down.
Of course, nothing primes the creative pump quite live having your team get
publicly bitch-dragged down the steps of New Orleans in a de facto MNC game
by a team you beat 5 weeks earlier in a de facto MNC elimination game.
Woo.
Shamelessly self-promoting,
--
Clark Moore
Florida State University
Clark Moore
In article <EMunt...@midway.uchicago.edu>, met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu
(Chris Metzler) wrote:
> In article <34be5a11...@snews.zippo.com> wood...@bunt.com (Trent
Woodruff) writes:
> >>Dylan F. Alexander was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
> >
> >>FUNNIEST POST
> >
> >Fetch Stick of Ohio State Armageddon (or some such...very rough
> >approximation) by Clark Moore
> >
> >(Sorry, I don't have a copy of it...)
>
> That was Casburn, I thought. Or do you mean a followup?
I did follow up Steve's post in that thread--had a Harry/Sally line, and
some SANDBAR woofing. Steve spawned the thread, and had that killer Johnny
Cash/Billy Ray Cyri line, and the sit-tragi-com factor, what with watching
in anguish as a couple Big 10 teams get skinned (and UMich has the :02
thing) while his longtime object of desire played the "friends" card. But
really, that's Steve's thread.
I did, on the other hand, do the "Fetch Stick of Bovine Armageddon," which
is carried in the foaming, snapping jaws of THE AVENGING COLLIE of the
TEXAS AGGIES.
Shrug. I leave the scoring to the judges.
--
Clark Moore <of course, i do believe the judges are aggi...>
Florida State University
Paul L. Pearson
Czar Christopher Phenice I wrote:
>
> Chris Metzler <met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu> wrote:
> > In article <69m97d$rdj$1...@excalibur.flash.net> Czar Christopher Phenice I <cbel...@flash.net> writes:
> >>Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
> >>> Clark Moore wrote:
> >>>>
> >>>> In article <34BE92...@ou.edu>, Gary McManus <gmcm...@ou.edu> wrote:
> >>>>
> >>>> > Justin Greenfield wrote:
> >>>> > >
> >>>> > > Clark Moore wrote:
> >>>> > > >
> >>>> > > > > BEST BAIT
> >>>> > > > "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
> >>>> > >
> >>>> > > Um, no, that was Todd Gak and RD Mercer. Please check your facts!
> >>>> >
> >>>> > What part of get some balls and post under your own name do you not
> >>>> > understand?
> >>>>
> >>>> Okay, then, whoever of you dirt-eating, inbred, single-wide-dwelling
> >>>> bastards posted it, I nominate HIM.
> >>>>
> >>>> Jeez.
> >>>
> >>> DEER LORD!!! I do'nt eat dirt!
> >>
> >>...And when there was no crawdads, we ate sand.
> >
> > You ate sand?
>
> We ate sand.
>
LUXURY!!!
We used to have to get up at five o'clock in the morning, eat a handful
of freezing cold gravel...
Pro
(sand rules if you season it right)
Toby Drake
>
I'll do better next year on this thing, but I wantedto participate...
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> BEST FISHERMAN
macmanus
> BEST BAIT
the current racial thread...
> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
mcmanus or goop...or dylan
> FUNNIEST POST
that fetch stick thing was pretty funny...
> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
chris grovitz
> THE MANU TROPHY
at this point, anyone who replies to marlin
Chris Grovich
Justin Greenfield <Jus...@ou.edu> wrote:
>Clark Moore wrote:
>>
>> BEST BAIT
>> "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in
alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
>
>Um, no, that was Todd Gak and RD Mercer. Please check your facts!
Hi.
---
Chris (Hi Goob!) Grovich - President
Chris Grovich
In article <EMv4E...@midway.uchicago.edu>,
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (Chris Metzler) wrote:
>In article <69k1r2$t...@r02n01.cac.psu.edu> cgro...@psu.edu (Chris
Grovich) writes:
>>Here's the film schedule for today:
>>
>>6 am: NOTER DAME, 1997. (replaces NOTER DAME, 1977)
>>7 am: TEXAS, 1997. (replaces TEXAS, 1976)
>>8 am: OKLAHOMA, off-season 1995. (replaces "SOONER FAMILY")
>>9 am: GREAT EXPECTATIONS (a bio of "prominent alumni")
>>10am: GETTING ASS KICKED BY YOUR STATE'S AG SCHOOL (Purdue included)
>>11am: FREDDIE KITCHENS, a bio (replaces JOE NAMATH, a bio)
>>noon: WATCH JIMMY JOHNSON CELEBRATE (one-hour director's cut)
>>1 pm: WATCH TERRY BOWDEN CELEBRATE SHAMELESSLY
>>2 pm: Coke Break
>>3 pm: OKLAHOMA, THE POST-SWITZER YEARS
>>4 pm: ND's LAST-SECOND FG AGAINST U$C IN 1996, a reprise
>> (U$C fans will be treated to "O.J.'s POST-FOOTBALL DAYS")
>>5 pm: PEP TALK: The impending re-birth of Miami football
>>6 pm: LIP-BALM AND YOU, a one hour documentary
>>7 pm: GETTING ASS KICKED BY YOUR STATE'S AG SCHOOL (repeat)
>>8 pm: ROBO-COACH: THE SECOND COMING.
>>9 pm: THE BALANCED OFFENSE, A RETROSPECTIVE
>>10pm: BEDTIME STORIES (read by "prominent alumni")
>Oooh, forgot about this one. This was a good nomination.
Thanks. I'm not sure I ever laughed so hard from rsfc before
or since.
Jonathan Sadow
>Grovich) wrote:
>
>}>THE MANU TROPHY
>}
>} I have to ask since I've only been here for about a year...
>} What the hell is it?
>Manu is the most annoying, worthless, and despicable person to
>ever grace this group. He's a blind, obsessed CU fan who accuses
>Osborne of cheating every other game and actually believes his
>crap, which along with his complete lack of style separates him
>from Ted.
>
>The Manu Trophy is intended for the individual who best emobodies
>the spirit of Manu. I personally chose my nominees, Sadow and Zecker,
>because I find them fairly annoying, overly obsessed and willfully
>ignorant when anything that puts their team or conference in a bad
>light is discussed.
greatest season ever, setting a school record for wins in a season and
going to and even winning an Alliance bowl, but all Dylan can think
about is his beloved Mildcats losing the previous Cotton Bowl to a WAC
team. KSU fans are like noveau riche; thanks to their unprepossessing
backgrounds, they can't handle the slightest criticism without lashing
out in self-defense. Their many years of losing has conditioned them
like the slaves of the old American South to have a natural inferiority
complex (which, of course, has hindered the progress of
African-Americans even to this day, as every reader of r.s.f.c knows).
Well, I've got news for Dylan and the rest of his ilk: Grow up
and get over it! You've got a great team - with Heisman Trophy front-
runner Michael Bishop returning, the Purple Pantherines have a great
chance of winning their first Big Ten title ever. So why can't you
just win in good grace instead of rubbing every victory into
everyone's face? And when the unthinkable happens, like last year's
Cotton Bowl result, why can't you accept the defeat with good grace
when people like me remind you of your prediction that KSU would win
in a rout? I can understand why your disciplinary file is so thick,
since I see you even pick on skateboarders, anime fans, and other
mentally handicapped people. With that in mind, I consider it an
honor that you nominated me for the Manu Trophy. You, sir, should be
nominated for the Heiskell Trophy.
>In Sadow's defense, I suspect he's mostly joking and even considered
>him for a Best Fisherman nomination.
Jonathan Sadow
geo...@UHUPVM1.BITNET
geo...@uhupvm1.uh.edu
JSa...@uh.edu
The William Marsh Rice University
The Eternal Southwest Conference Champion
The Division I-A football team with the best record in Texas for 1996-7
The only U.S. News & World Report Tier I school in Texas
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <34C03B50...@austx.tandem.com>, Toby Drake
<tdr...@austx.tandem.com> wrote:
}> POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
}
}mcmanus or goop...or dylan
^^^^
I nominate this for funniest post.
Chris Metzler
><cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
>
>}
>}Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
>}might be appropriate.
>}
>}offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
>}inate Mike Dahmus.
>}
For this one, my nominees are:
Gary McManus
Chris Bellomy (looks like it's working)
-c
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
"Glory be! The funk's on me!" -- Bootsy Collins
Chris Metzler
In article <69ovv2$94t$1...@newsfep4.sprintmail.com> "Mark Allen" <mal...@mcfadden-sales.com> writes:
[ snip ]
>>POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
>
>Who wrote "If it moos, it will loose..."? (Was that Clark?)
Oh! I forgot about that one! Damn!
-c
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
"Just talkin' loud . . .and sayin' nothin' . . .sayin' nothin'" -- James Brown
Gary McManus
Chris Grovich wrote:
>
> Justin Greenfield <Jus...@ou.edu> wrote:
>
> >Clark Moore wrote:
> >>
> >> BEST BAIT
> >> "Hike up your skirt, little boy"--McManus in
> alt.fan.dave-matthews-band
> >
> >Um, no, that was Todd Gak and RD Mercer. Please check your facts!
>
> Hi.
>
I wuz there...I was just catching scraps, though.
Gary McManus
Chris Metzler
In article <34bfd3b0...@snews.zippo.com> wood...@bunt.com (Trent Woodruff) writes:
>>Chris Metzler was cut from the Oregon State football team for saying...
>
>>Trent Woodruff ("Brook chose to fly; Brook chose to die.")
>
>Uh...wow.
>
>(Hey to Goob! <wild, maniacal laughter>)
Hmmm, well, some correspondance with Trent, and a visit to DejaNews, has
rectified my newbieness on this score.
Given this fact, brought to my attention by Trent the Honorable (who
surely wouldn't want to win an award on such terms), I would request that
my nomination for Poet Laureate pass to Clark Moore for his "If it moos,
it will lose" analysis.
-c
P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
--
Chris Metzler Work Address: Astrophysics, MS-209
630-840-3662 (office) Fermi National Accelerator Lab
met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu (play) P.O. Box 500
met...@denali.fnal.spam-me-not.gov (work) Batavia, IL 60510 USA
Barney must be destroyed.
Czar Christopher Phenice I
Chris Metzler <met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu> wrote:
> P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
> was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
> a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
> current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
Goob? A person? You *are* new to these parts.
--CCI
(that's some damn convincing AI work, though)
Clark Moore
In article <69roc7$3...@mozo.cc.purdue.edu>, d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre
Ervin) wrote:
> Mark Allen (wal...@sprintmail.com) wrote:
>
> : >NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>
> : dre
>
> Clark Moore (mo...@scri.fsu.edu) wrote:
>
> : > NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
> : Andre Ervin
>
> Ahem.
>
> B1111TTTT3333 MMMM3333!!!!!
>
> *sigh*
>
> Exhibit A:
>
> -----
> Subject: Re: Penn State
> From: d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre Ervin)
> Date: 1996/07/10
> Message-ID: <dre-100796...@news.purdue.edu>
> Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Sorry, dre. I meant it in a good way. Think of it as baseball's rookie of
the year--first FULL season, or whatever. Hell, if I were running away
with a category the way you and Grovich are with this one, I'd be wearing
my newbieness like a badge of honor.
> (Hey Mark, you fukin' cop; we even had a little flamewar that year!)
AND IF YOU DO'NT QUIT WOOFING ABOUT BEATING BALL STATE, MARK AND I WILL
HAVE THAT IN COMMON, BOILER BOYEEEE!!!!! DO'NT MAKE ME NOCK ALL THE STUFF
OFF YOUR SHELFS!!!!!111!!
That notwithstanding, Mark probably is a fukin cop.
Czar Christopher Phenice I
ddi...@bluejay.creighton.edu wrote:
> Chris Metzler wrote:
>> P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
>> was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
>> a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
>> current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
>
> I believe that Goob has replaced himself with a 'bot. Rather neat bit of
> programming at that. But it definitely fails the Turing Test.
Uh, Goob always has been a bot.
--CCPI
Andre Ervin
Mark Allen (wal...@sprintmail.com) wrote:
: >NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
: dre
Clark Moore (mo...@scri.fsu.edu) wrote:
: > NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
: Andre Ervin
Ahem.
B1111TTTT3333 MMMM3333!!!!!
*sigh*
Exhibit A:
-----
Subject: Re: Penn State
From: d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre Ervin)
Date: 1996/07/10
Message-ID: <dre-100796...@news.purdue.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
In article <31E2FCB9...@cs.utk.edu>, Stephan Zevan
<ze...@cs.utk.edu> wrote:
> Eric Enholm wrote:
> >
> > trent.w...@nosurf.com (Trent Woodruff) wrote:
> > >I'm still trying to find the difference between Eastern teams and
> > >Big 10...
>
> Big Ten teams play on astroturf.
>
> Steve
Steve...if that's a slam, it makes you quite the hypocrite posting from
U--we just switched to grass--T.
-------
--
dre
ddi...@bluejay.creighton.edu
Chris Metzler wrote:
> P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
> was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
> a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
> current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
I believe that Goob has replaced himself with a 'bot. Rather neat bit of
programming at that. But it definitely fails the Turing Test.
David
------
David Dirgo (ddi...@creighton.edu)
Creighton University School of Law
Omaha, Nebraska, USA
------
Chris Metzler
In article <69rq47$3m...@pigeon.creighton.edu> ddi...@bluejay.creighton.edu () writes:
>Chris Metzler wrote:
>
>> P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
>> was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
>> a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
>> current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
>
>I believe that Goob has replaced himself with a 'bot. Rather neat bit of
>programming at that. But it definitely fails the Turing Test.
Did Goob pass the Turing Test beforehand?
-c
Andre Ervin
Dylan F. Alexander (dy...@tamu.edu) wrote:
: In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>,
: dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) wrote:
: }BEST FISHERMAN
Gary McManus
Marin H.
: }BEST BAIT
"Can America Draw 121,696..."
"Sweden vs. America"
: }POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Deke Arndt
Nikk Pilato
: }FUNNIEST POST
Steve Casburn's Ted/Colorado bash
Charles Hoequist's admonishment to Justin
: }NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Chris Grovich
: }THE MANU TROPHY
Patrick Tong
JEC8686
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Hey to Ted
From: Casb...@osu.edu (Steve Casburn)
Date: 1998/01/08
Message-ID: <Casburn.1-ya024080...@newsstand.acs.ohio-state.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
In article <68s60q$fkq$1...@news.tamu.edu>, goo...@unix.tamu.edu (El Goob
(Gary W. Smith)) wrote:
>
>
> I hear ya BAYBEEE!!!!
>
>
> - goob (tom's fed. sheep bred! AGGEE RED!!!) smith
Brie-fed. White-bred. Hessler spread.
GO RICKY AND THE BUFFS!
Steve
--
Steve Casburn (Casb...@osu.edu)
"Shut up he explained"
-- Ring Lardner, Jr.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Tech 10 - FSU 3 - Officials 39 (was Re: HANTA YO (was Re: Top Quarterbacks
From: hoeq...@bnr.ca (Charles Hoequist)
Date: 1997/07/25
Message-ID: <5racq9$p...@bcrkh13.bnr.ca>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
[repeated clubbing of fish deleted]
Dammit, Justin, catch and *release*. Even fish can feel limited pain.
Oh, the humanity.
-c.h.
or piscinity, maybe.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
dre
"Fishing, hell! He's using a fricking *net*!"
--some Purdue moron
Thomas Rooney
Dylan F. Alexander (dy...@tamu.edu) wrote:
>
> : }BEST FISHERMAN
McAnus vs. skateboarders/Australians/Sidists/DMBclones/Castleman/etc.
Marin "Mrs. Paul" Heiskell for obvious reasons
>
> : }BEST BAIT
Anything by Kris Jenner. I, and everybody else, wuz hooked.
Dylan in the Marching Band newsgroup
>
> : }POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Deke Arndt
Steve Cazzburn
>
> : }FUNNIEST POST
Clark Moore slams Cinderella (see below)
Deke's Hell Film Schedule (posted earlier)
> : }NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Andre Ervin
> : }MANU TROPHY
Mike & Christy Todd
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Major Theoretical Questions
Date: Thu, 21 Aug 1997 22:09:54 -0400
Organization: The Home Office
> GM
> lightlink.com/grudge
> (Current match: Cinderella vs. Snow White)
I'll take a shot at this one. A couple Disney-tough working girls who
fought authority, and beat its royal ass (one way or another). On the
surface, it looks close. But it really isn't.
Snow gets a much higher schedule-strength rating, since her chief
opponent
was a queen *and* a witch, while Cinderella basically slogged through a
McJob while waiting for a chance to hook up during social season. Hell,
her toughest opponent was her socioeconomic status, which is way less
dangerous than a psychoticallyjealos witxh-queen. And Snow may have
gotten
a prince to do her dirty work, but where's Cindy without that Fairy
Godmother? At home, whining.
Snow White overcame poisoning, death by the axe, homelessness, the
elements, AND managed to gain control of a colony of mining dwarves
(strictly by happenstance). Recruited royalty to slay royalty, with
only
the implicit
promise of some blue-collar trim to bargain with.
To end up as a princess, Cinderella had to do one thing: be home before
midnight. She couldn't get it done. Choker. She's just fortunate to
have
hooked up with the horniest prince in all Disney, or she would still be
cleaning chimneys. Basically, she had a job, had a place to live, was
in
no real danger. She just wasn't screwing a prince. Well, cry me a
river,
you spoiled little baby. Life just sort of sucks like that, most of the
time.
Anyway, Snow White would RUTS, and ship Cinderella off to the dwarf-porn
industry, where she belongs.
Haven't seen the page yet, so hey to y'all wherever appropriate.
Mark Allen
Dylan F. Alexander wrote in message ...
>In article <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I
><cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
>
>}I have a category nomination.
>}
>}Clark mentioned rsfc'ers whose contributions are typically of the
>}quick-hit followup variety. None of their posts are individually
>}worthy of Post of the Year, but cumulatively their contribution
>}is worth mention.
>}
>}Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
>}might be appropriate.
>}
>}As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
>}offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
>}inate Mike Dahmus.
>}
>}Hey, that reminds me: Dahmus should present an Aggie of the Year
>}award.
>
>Both proposals are accepted.
Casburn
Dahmus
Mark Allen
Clark Moore wrote in message ...
>(Andre Ervin) wrote:
>> Mark Allen (wal...@sprintmail.com) wrote:
>> : >NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>> : dre
>> Clark Moore (mo...@scri.fsu.edu) wrote:
>> : > NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>> : Andre Ervin
>> Ahem.
>>
>> B1111TTTT3333 MMMM3333!!!!!
>>
>> *sigh*
[snip evidence]
>Sorry, dre. I meant it in a good way. Think of it as baseball's rookie of
>the year--first FULL season, or whatever...
Same here--I figured the nominations preceding mine were appropriate--just
chimin' in.
>> (Hey Mark, you fukin' cop; we even had a little flamewar that year!)
I kinda remember that--hit a fevered pitch a time or two...
YOU BOILERMAKERS NEED TO GET A CLOOOOO.....!!!!
>AND IF YOU DO'NT QUIT WOOFING ABOUT BEATING BALL STATE, MARK AND I WILL
>HAVE THAT IN COMMON, BOILER BOYEEEE!!!!! DO'NT MAKE ME NOCK ALL THE STUFF
>OFF YOUR SHELFS!!!!!111!!
>
>That notwithstanding, Mark probably is a fukin cop.
Shamelessly patrolling the bedrooms of the Bible Belt looking for Sodomy
violations and issuing citations (mostly in Tennessee...),
Mark
Andre Ervin
Clark Moore (mo...@scri.fsu.edu) wrote:
: In article <69roc7$3...@mozo.cc.purdue.edu>, d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre
: Ervin) wrote:
: > Ahem.
: >
: > B1111TTTT3333 MMMM3333!!!!!
: >
: > *sigh*
: >
: > Exhibit A:
: >
: > -----
: > Subject: Re: Penn State
: > From: d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre Ervin)
: > Date: 1996/07/10
: > Message-ID: <dre-100796...@news.purdue.edu>
: > Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
: Sorry, dre. I meant it in a good way. Think of it as baseball's rookie of
: the year--first FULL season, or whatever. Hell, if I were running away
: with a category the way you and Grovich are with this one, I'd be wearing
: my newbieness like a badge of honor.
I bet you think Im looking pretty dum right now.
: > (Hey Mark, you fukin' cop; we even had a little flamewar that year!)
: AND IF YOU DO'NT QUIT WOOFING ABOUT BEATING BALL STATE, MARK AND I WILL
: HAVE THAT IN COMMON, BOILER BOYEEEE!!!!! DO'NT MAKE ME NOCK ALL THE STUFF
: OFF YOUR SHELFS!!!!!111!!
Mr. ZamFIR THE SPHERE,
JUST BECAUSE YOUR CHUCKING A LOUSY FEW MOORE COINS INTO WELLS FOR BONZI THAN
I AM, AND JUST BECAUSE YOOV'E GOT A STUFFED CHARLIE CARDINAL ON YOU'RE DESK,
AND JUST BECAUSE I-69 IS POSITIVELY PICARESK COMPARED TO I-65, DOES'NT MEAN
I CA'NT ruts U INTO OBLIVION FOR DRIVES BY MECCA^H^H^H^HUNCIE ON SUNDAYS
THIS MONTH(*)!!!!! W000000F!!!!
: That notwithstanding, Mark probably is a fukin cop.
Hmmm. And today I saw motorists littered all over Buckeye roadsides wearing
pained expressions...
--
*Dre 2, Clark ?
"She be all up in the Kool-Aid but don't know the flava."
-the Most Reverend Freddrick "Redd Hot" Soss, H.N.I.C., on
RSFC's most intractable spammer
Andre Ervin
Mark Allen (wal...@sprintmail.com) wrote:
: Clark Moore wrote in message ...
: >That notwithstanding, Mark probably is a fukin cop.
: Shamelessly patrolling the bedrooms of the Bible Belt looking for Sodomy
: violations and issuing citations (mostly in Tennessee...),
Typical cop. I bet you're letting the hotties off with a warning (shot)...
--
Dre
Charles Hoequist
In article <moore-ya02408000...@news.fsu.edu>, mo...@scri.fsu.edu (Clark Moore) writes:
|> In article <69roc7$3...@mozo.cc.purdue.edu>, d...@expert.cc.purdue.edu (Andre
|> Ervin) wrote:
|>
[...]
|> > Clark Moore (mo...@scri.fsu.edu) wrote:
|> >
|> > : > NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
|> > : Andre Ervin
|> >
|> > Ahem.
|> >
|> > B1111TTTT3333 MMMM3333!!!!!
|> >
[...]
|> --first FULL season, or whatever. Hell, if I were running away
|> with a category the way you and Grovich are with this one, I'd be wearing
|> my newbieness like a badge of honor.
|>
[...]
I'm persuaded. I hadn't listed Andre as Best NewB because he
started his eligbility last season, but I'll go with Clark on
this one and grant him a retroactive redshirt.
NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Andre Ervin
-c.h.
stay away from agents, lad, and you've got a bright future here
El Goob (Gary W. Smith)
In some article, Chris Metzler <met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu> wrote:
->
->P.S. The wildest part of looking at the Berringer thread in DejaNews
->was the experience of seeing Goob post paragraph-long arguments expressing
->a carefully thought out and cogently defended opinion. Are we sure the
->current Goob and the old Goob are the same person?
Hi.
- goob (barney... yuck) smith
J. Hugh Sullivan
"Mark Allen" <wal...@sprintmail.com> wrote:
>Dylan F. Alexander wrote in message ...
>>In article <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I
>><cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
>>
>>}I have a category nomination.
I have a category nomination, too - for next year: "The person who said the
most lines I wish I had said".
Since my nomination would be for an Aubarn grad, I again suggest that we wait
until next year when, hopefully, SOMEBODY/ANYBODY will top him.
"If we weren't all crazy, we would all go insane". J. Buffet. If you're
listening, Mr. Barnes, I found one; it was in the newspaper today.
It just occurred to me how appropriate your last name (Barnes) is for an Aubarn
grad! 8-) I hope you know I'm funnin'.
Roll Tide, Go Big Bird,
Hugh
Andre Ervin
Chris Metzler (met...@oddjob.uchicago.edu) wrote:
: In article <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu> dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) writes:
: >In article <69nsjk$s6u$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I
: ><cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
: >
: >}
: >}Something like "MR. CONSISTENCY" or "THE STEVEN WRIGHT TROPHY"
: >}might be appropriate.
: >}
: >}As this is my best if not only chance to crack this thread, I
: >}offer this category to the readers of RSFC, and personally nom-
: >}inate Mike Dahmus.
: >Both proposals are accepted.
: For this one, my nominees are:
: Gary McManus
: Chris Bellomy (looks like it's working)
Definitely.
---------------------------------
Subject: Re: New Low in Classnessless: Texas A&M Fans
From: Czar Christopher I <cbel...@flash.net>
Date: 1997/12/08
Message-ID: <66ijh8$am3$1...@excalibur.flash.net>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
Maria Pescadero <mar...@island.paradise.edu> wrote:
> Being an ardent college football fan, I turned on the Big 12
> championship game at havetime. Unfotrunutely, the University of
> Nebraska was leading the University of Texas A&M by 37-3.
You silly Latina chingaretta, spell it THE University of Texas A&M
next time, or I'll BLOW YOUR TITS OFF.
--CCI
(now get in the kitchen and bake me a pie, bitch!)
-----------------------------------------------------------
--
dre
"When we let freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every
hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that
day when *everyone*, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles,
Protestants and Catholics, Believers and Non-Believers, Red-Sauce'ers
and Yellow Sauce'ers, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of
the old Negro spiritual--y'all know the words; say it with me--
"Kiss my ass! Kiss my ass! Damn it all, woman, you can kiss my ass!"
Bill Walden
: BEST FISHERMAN
Marin
Gary McManus
: BEST BAIT
the Armistad post by Marin
Pride of the South by Marin
: POET LAUREATE OF RSFC
Clark Moore
Deke Arndt
: FUNNIEST POST
I don't know the author or the title, but the gist was that during the
UT vs. TAMU game the Texas corners would "spontanously combust" due to
the A&M recievers going past them.
Chris Grovich's PSU song (Coke bottle glasses guy - see below).
: NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
Eh... I'm kind of a newbie, so I'll skip this one.
: THE MANU TROPHY
JEC...
Marin
--
Regards,
Bill Walden in Fort Collins, CO
Warning! I am *not* an official HP spokesperson. No warranty is implied.
The opinions expressed above may or may not match those of the HP company.
HP speaks for HP, I speak for myself.
----------------------------------------------------------
From: cgro...@psu.edu (Chris Grovich)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Another addition for the song book...
Walking home from class, I passed Joe Paterno on the sidewalk. I'm a bit
thankful I wasn't wearing my MSU hat (old men can surprise you with their
quickness sometimes...hey to my high school pricipal), and was inspired
to write this song:
(and yes, he really *does* look like that)
Coke Bottle Glass Guy
-----------------------
A long, long time ago, when we used to run it, how the Lions used
to make me smile.
And I knew if Fran had his chance, he would make K. Collins pass,
And everything was happy for a while.
But Wally sure did make me shiver, with every pickoff he delivered.
Bad news on the doorstep, Dahmus weauxfed with each step.
I can't remember if I cried when the Hawkeyes came and
skinned our hides.
But something touched me deep inside the day the run game died.
So bye-bye Coke Bottle Glass Guy
Hey I really like those specs man, was the eye doctor high?
That preseason poll, man, it sure did lie.
Singing "this'll be the day the team dies"
This'll be the day the team dies.
Did you write the new playbook, and do have faith in a 10-yard hook
When we can't even catch the clap?
And to you believe in ball control, does three-and-out rip out your soul?
And, can you teach our dumb defense not to blow?
Well I know that you are losing it, the defense just bends and submits.
We all turned mighty blue, it was shades of Zero-U.
We were a RUTSing team with two MNCs
But the Big Ten brought us to our knees
Do you recall 49-14 the day the run game died?
We were singing bye-bye Coke Bottle Glass Guy
Couldn't drive against UM, but we are still alive.
The Citrus Bowl sure won't turn back the tide
Singing "hey, at least we're not 6-5"
Hey, at least we're not 6-5.
I met a coach who must've snoozed,
When UM knocked us out of our shoes.
He said "Bullshit!" and turned away...
I went down the the sacred field
Where all we did was kindly yield
Four touchdowns, in the first half, what a shame!
But in my sleep I always scream
In fear of Satan's passing schemes.
Our O.C. must be tokin'
Our pass defense is broken.
And the conferences I admired least,
The WAC, Big Twelve and our dear Big East.
We'd be hardpressed to go to the Peach
The day the run game died...
And we were singing...
Bye Bye Coke Bottle Glass Guy
Yeah, we really RUTSed on Pittsburgh
In a rare show of pride.
Our punter's busy, I think he strained his right thigh
Singing "this'll be the day the team dies."
-chris. http://www.personal.psu.edu/cxg202
Czar Christopher Phenice I
Bill Walden <w...@cnd.hp.com> wrote:
> : FUNNIEST POST
> I don't know the author or the title, but the gist was that during the
> UT vs. TAMU game the Texas corners would "spontanously combust" due to
> the A&M recievers going past them.
HEY! THAT WAS ME! WOOHOO!!!
-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: A&M - tu: The Royal Analysis
From: Czar Christopher I <cbel...@flash.net>
Date: 1997/11/23
Message-ID: <65art2$dn5$1...@excalibur.flash.net>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
[More Headers]
I thought it was time that someone put together a thoughtful
analysis of the upcoming A&M-tu game. So, without further pause...
WHEN A&M HAS THE BALL
Dante Hall. Sirr Parker. Branndon Stewart. A bunch of receivers
who actually can catch. And a bovine defense that surrendered
30+ points to KANSAS, for chrissakes. The bonfire before the game
will be a campfire compared to the burning of the tu defense. Look
for the inexperienced bovine secondary to SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST IN
THE SECOND HALF. IF YOU LEFT THE UCLA GAME EARLY, DON'T EVEN BOTHER
GOING TO COLLEGE STATION, COWS!!! OUR RUNNING BACKS COULD DO LESS
RUNNING AT A MARATHON!!! YOUR DEFENSE COULDN'T STOP OUR PASSING
OFFENSE IF IT HAD PATRIOT MISSILES!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
WHEN tu HAS THE BALL
Look for Erricky "Rastaman" Williams to be shut down by A&M's
secret weapon: John Mackovic. The burden of advancing the ball
for the Cows will fall to James "the hardest working man in Austin,
mostly because he's constantly running for his frigging life" Brown,
WHO WILL LOSE LIMBS TO THE FEROCIOUS AGGEE ATTACK DEFENSE. BY THE
END HE WILL WISH HE HAD IT AS EASY AS TY DETMER!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
AND HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE RECEIVERS WHO CAN'T CATCH, HUH? JUST
THINK HOW BAD IT'LL FEEL WHEN THEY DON'T EVEN LOOK BACK FOR THE BALL
FOR FEAR OF BEING CORYATTED AGAIN!!! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!! EXPECT
THE COWS LEADING OFFENSIVE WEAPON TO BE DUANE SCHULTIS, AS HE WILL
END UP PUNTING ON FIRST DOWN! OH, THE HUMANITY!!!
Special Teams
FORGET SPECIAL TEAMS. REMEMBER 51-15, AND THE WRATH THAT MUST
SURELY FOLLOW. YOU BOVINES WILL *KNOW* YOU ARE OUR BEE-ATCHES
WHEN WE LAY OUR VENGEANCE UPON THEE!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
This has been an Official Pronouncement by your Czar.
--Czar Christopher I
(it shall be so)
-----------------------------------------------------
This is the rarest of posts in that it both scored and got an
assist (see "Bovine Armageddon, Fetch Stick of").
I guess I don't suck as bad as I thought I did.
--CCPI
Scott Harper
In article <6a0fjd$433$1...@excalibur.flash.net>, Czar Christopher Phenice I <cbel...@flash.net> wrote:
>I guess I don't suck as bad as I thought I did.
Hey dude, don't be so hard on yourself.
harp
austin,tx
Gary McManus
suck...hard on...yourself. You guys are sick.
Gary McManus
Jonathan P. Elders
Mathews J. Thundyil wrote:
> Does Deke's "An Okie Christmas..." get nominated for something?
>
> There should be a "CUTE" trophy for comments like
> Where has the magic gone - Indeed!
> 30-27
> Dude, don't be a d**k
> Hi.
> What part of ... don't you understand.
>
>
> Matt Thundyil
"I want my two dollars!!!!"
(self-promotion sucks.......)
--
Jon Elders "We learned from the forbidden fruit
Rice '95 For brains there is no substitute"
Wash U. '99/'00 = Infinity? (Robert Frost, "Quandry")
Czar Christopher Phenice I
This is liek the hardlign riligius peeple waching PORN and SMUTT
all day and nigt just so thay can bich abowt how dirrty it is.
If you wood spind morr timn reeding the BIBEL you migt under stand
how too liv and let liv.
--CCPI
Dylan F. Alexander
In article <4nUw.241$9Y3.7...@news1.atlantic.net>, j...@rci.net wrote:
}In <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>, dy...@tamu.edu
(Dylan F. Alexander) writes:
}>
}>}>THE MANU TROPHY
}>}
}>} I have to ask since I've only been here for about a year...
}>} What the hell is it?
}>
}>Manu is the most annoying, worthless, and despicable person to
}>ever grace this group.
}
}
} Hmm I thought that the Coz Award was for the above described attributes
}Dylan?
Last year's Coz Award (or whatever I called it) was for the
person who most obviously woofed up his team and then dissappeared
when they lost, which is more of a Coz signature than the fact
he's a complete loon. We've got lots o' those.
--
Dylan Alexander dy...@tamu.edu
"Please Dylan, in the name of all that's holy, leave us be. If
annoyance were a crime, you'd be Jeffrey Dahmer." - C. Chase
Chris Grovich
In article <69vhnv$j...@bcrkh13.bnr.ca>,
ho...@bnr.ca (Charles Hoequist) wrote:
>I'm persuaded. I hadn't listed Andre as Best NewB because he
>started his eligbility last season, but I'll go with Clark on
>this one and grant him a retroactive redshirt.
>
>NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>Andre Ervin
>
>-c.h.
>stay away from agents, lad, and you've got a bright future here
Im gonna buy him a fukin soot.
---
Chris (BEEFCAKE!!!) Grovich - President
Pennsylvanians Against the Big Ten
http://www.personal.psu.edu/cxg202
Nyarlathotep
In <34BEAA...@lanl.gov>, Dave Becker <dbe...@lanl.gov> writes:
>> NEWBIE OF THE YEAR
>Buck Naked
>
Buck is not a newbie fellas. He has been around since 1994 or so,
maybe longer. Though I guess I shouldn't try to ruin his shot at an award. :)
John Midtgard
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Levels of SCUM! (The lower the more scumlike!)
==============================================
Insurance Salesman
--\
Child Pornographer
--\
Socialist
--\
Microsoft
--\
Spammer
--\
Ga. Bulldog
Nyarlathotep
In <dylan-ya02408000...@news.tamu.edu>, dy...@tamu.edu (Dylan F. Alexander) writes:
>
>}>THE MANU TROPHY
>}
>} I have to ask since I've only been here for about a year...
>} What the hell is it?
>
>Manu is the most annoying, worthless, and despicable person to
>ever grace this group.
Hmm I thought that the Coz Award was for the above described attributes
Dylan?
Andre Ervin
Jonathan P. Elders (jp...@cec.wustl.edu) wrote:
: Mathews J. Thundyil wrote:
: > Does Deke's "An Okie Christmas..." get nominated for something?
: >
: > There should be a "CUTE" trophy for comments like
: > Where has the magic gone - Indeed!
: > 30-27
: > Dude, don't be a d**k
: > Hi.
: > What part of ... don't you understand.
: >
: >
: > Matt Thundyil
"Frightened and confused"
"We're just tougher than you."
: "I want my two dollars!!!!"
: (self-promotion sucks.......)
Hey, it's better than self-flagellation...
Jonathan P. Elders
Andre Ervin wrote:
>
> Jonathan P. Elders (jp...@cec.wustl.edu) wrote:
>
> "Frightened and confused"
> "We're just tougher than you."
>
> : "I want my two dollars!!!!"
>
> : (self-promotion sucks.......)
>
> Hey, it's better than self-flagellation...
> --
> dre
"I want my two dollars!!"
(You have now stepped into the pit of doom.....)
Jonathan P. Elders
Andre Ervin wrote:
<>
"Two Dollars!!"
Jonathan P. Elders
Andre Ervin wrote:
<>
"I want my two dollars!!"
Jonathan P. Elders
Andre Ervin wrote:
>
> Mark Allen (wal...@sprintmail.com) wrote:
>
> : Clark Moore wrote in message ...
> : >That notwithstanding, Mark probably is a fukin cop.
>
> : Shamelessly patrolling the bedrooms of the Bible Belt looking for Sodomy
> : violations and issuing citations (mostly in Tennessee...),
>
> Typical cop. I bet you're letting the hotties off with a warning (shot)...
> --
> Dre
>
> "She be all up in the Kool-Aid but don't know the flava."
> RSFC's most intractable spammer
"I want my two dollars!!"
Jonathan P. Elders
Andre Ervin wrote:
>
> "Fishing, hell! He's using a fricking *net*!"
> --some Purdue moron
"Two Dollars!!"