Free to be me
Svetlana
I have written this lyric. Please give me your honest opinion. Thanks in
advance.
Svetlana.
Free to be me
[v1]
I'm just a nobody
You see
I'm just a nobody
Lost in the sea
The sea of so many nobodies
Like me.
[ch1]
I have nowhere to go
And I have nothing to prove
I have no one to depend on
I am so free to be me
[v2]
I'm just a nobody
For me
To be just a nobody
Means to be free
To be free from the other nobodies
Like me
[ch2]
I have nowhere to go
And I have nothing to loose
I have no one to pretend to
I am so free to be me
[v3]
I would not change it
For any fee
To be just a nobody
Means to be free
Free to be loved by the other nobodies
Like me
[ch3]
I have nowhere to go
I am where I should be
I feel lucky to know
That I am free to be me
Free to be me
I am so free to be me
(C) 2000 Svetlana S.
Roger Häggström
>I have written this lyric. Please give me your honest opinion. Thanks in
>advance.
I thought it was good (as always). Check in my "Losers Blues", it's the
same old subject!
Keep up the good work,
-Roger
Konnrad / T Taylor
> I'm just a nobody
> You see
> I'm just a nobody
> Lost in the sea
> The sea of so many nobodies
> Like me.
"*A* sea of nobodies" fits better.
Otherwise... Yep - it's a good lyric. A bit TOO good... how long have
you been writing?
And I hope this isn't some sort of depressing, literal song, and more a
political/social insight into how you are viewed in the general populace
whole.
Yes.
TOM
Svetlana
Hi Tom,
Konnrad / T Taylor <t...@stutaylor.SPAMISBAD.freeserve.co.uk> wrote in
article <891kkb$851$6...@newsg2.svr.pol.co.uk>...
> > [v1]
> > I'm just a nobody
> > You see
> > I'm just a nobody
> > Lost in the sea
> > The sea of so many nobodies
> > Like me.
>
> "*A* sea of nobodies" fits better.
Yes, that's true
>
>
> Otherwise... Yep - it's a good lyric. A bit TOO good... how long have
> you been writing?
Thanks, I know what you mean by TOO good, it's not angry, it's
contented, happy.
I've been writing on and off for over 10 years now, but not just lyrics.
> And I hope this isn't some sort of depressing, literal song, and more a
> political/social insight into how you are viewed in the general populace
> whole.
>
> Yes.
>
> TOM
It was not written to be a depressing song. There is a great sense
of freedom in not trying to be somebody. All my life I thought that if I am
not accomplished in some way than I am a nobody, just to realise that after
all my accomplishments, I am still a nobody on the greater scale of things.
It's all relative, but at the same time, so are the other people around me
and we are the people with the real power, we are the audience
/consumers/potential fans that everyone tries to predict and win over.
Svetlana.
Sabrina Spellman
first but after a few reads over time its a sweet lyric, definatly a good
one!
Svetlana wrote:
> Hi,
> I have written this lyric. Please give me your honest opinion. Thanks in
> advance.
>
> Svetlana.
>
> Free to be me
>
> [v1]
> I'm just a nobody
> You see
> I'm just a nobody
> Lost in the sea
> The sea of so many nobodies
> Like me.
>
> [ch1]
> I have nowhere to go
> And I have nothing to prove
> I have no one to depend on
> I am so free to be me
>
> [v2]
> I'm just a nobody
--
-Saby
Boguslaw Krammes
Svetlana,
Nice bit of irony, to say that being nobody, or being like everyone
else, makes you free to be who you are. It almost overcomes the song's
problems, the first of which is the title: It has been used in too many
songs, not to mention countless advertising slogans. Do an AltaVista
search on that title, in quotes, and you will see what I mean. The
phrase is threadbare, bankrupt.
Again, I appreciate the irony, but I'm not sure it's enough to rescue
the lyric from what seems to me a self-pitying tone. Mileage may vary;
I've bashed Smashing Pumpkins for the same thing, and they seem pretty
credible among fans and critics. It's just that "despite all my rage/ I
am still just a rat in a cage" seems a pathetic stance for a rocker. It
inspires a big shrug. Others may respond differently.
Couple of technical things: I wouldn't rhyme "see" with "sea," if it
were me. They're homophones; it's almost like rhyming a word with
itself. I'd also try to avoid rhyming "-ee" with "nobody," because you
have to sing it "nobod-EE," with the emPHASis on the wrong sylLABle. We
all succumb to this temptation sometime, but I think it's usually
avoidable.
You need some fresh and arresting imagery. You don't need to invent it.
Just grab some picture books off the shelf or do an AltaVista image
search on some strange word. You don't even have to plan what to look
for or how to use it. I just did one on the fist word that came to
mind, which was "staid." Check it out
http://www.altavista.com/cgi-bin/query?pg=q&what=web&imgset=1&stype=sima
ge&q=staid&iclr=1&ibw=1&iexc=1&mmW=1&micat=0
(Hope that worked.)
Looka there-- 59 images found, and holy serendipity, the first page is
most unexpectedly all First Aid pix. (Because the filenames were like
1staid, firstaid, etc.) Check out that second hit. What's in there?
Fatigues, shovels, grenades, helmets, maps, gloves-- army gear. Could
you use any of this stuff to make your ironic point about individuality?
Why, yes-- this stuff happens to be a uniform. A uniform, get it?
The first hit is an ad for a first aid kit. Let's see what's in there:
Bandages, gauze, a guide to wilderness medicine. In light of your song,
this makes me think of the world as a dangerous wilderness from which we
can protect ourselves by blending with the herd. The phrase "infection
control" makes me think of individuality as a contagion, a virus.
I'm not saying you should use these particular ideas; it's just an
example of free associating to pull in imagery. Look at the bottom of
the third page of hits. An old lady in an old-timey photo! Maybe she
was nobody, too. Well, she's nobody now. And one day, your picture can
take its place alongside hers in the portrait gallery of nobodies.
Or maybe your narrator wants to appear to the world like that anonymous
face staring out from an old daguerrotype. Whatever. The idea is to
shake it up and see what falls out.
I'll end on an up note: Your central point is a compelling paradox, one
that I think is worth writing about!
++Boguslaw++
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Boguslaw Krammes
Boguslaw Krammes <no1u...@my-deja.com> wrote:
> (Hope that worked.)
It didn't. Stupid Deja wrapped the stupid URL. Maybe this will work
<a
href=http://www.altavista.com/cgi-bin/query?pg=q&what=web&imgset=1&stype
=simage&q=staid&iclr=1&ibw=1&iexc=1&mmW=1&micat=0>Clickie clickie for
silly images</a>
OK,
++Bog++
Boguslaw Krammes
Boguslaw Krammes <no1u...@my-deja.com> wrote:
> In article <89eimv$c41$1...@nnrp1.deja.com>,
> Boguslaw Krammes <no1u...@my-deja.com> wrote:
>
> > (Hope that worked.)
>
> It didn't. Stupid Deja wrapped the stupid URL. Maybe this will work
No, it still didn't work. Sorry, y'all.
++B++