"Catching Cash" - long
Luke Burrage
Voice from above: Would you please welcome your host... William
Williamson!
(applause)
Hello and welcome to this, the first in the current series of the most
exciting game show of the third millennium, Catching Cash, the only TV
contest based entirely around juggling! Lets get straight on and meet our
two contestants this week. First up we have Robert Harris from Coventry.
Hello Rob.
Hello William. Call me Robert.
You are a plumber, a husband to Gillian, a father to Lucy aged 8 and
Thomas aged 4, all of whom are with us in the audience.
(view of Robert’s family)
So, Bobby, can you juggle?
Not really, but at work I'm always throwing my tools around and my boss,
said I should have a go on this show.
Well, good luck for later when we put your skill to the test. Now lets
meet our next contestant, Jennifer Darwin. Jenny, how are you this evening?
I'm feeling good but slightly nervous, William. And call me Jennifer.
Jenny is 22, single and has worked as a professional masseuse for the past
8 months. So, Jen, how is your juggling?
Well, I've been able to juggle since I was only 12 years old but I've
never gotten past a 3 ball cascade.
That may be the key to success later on this very show. How can a
beautiful young lady like you lose?
Ummm...
A big round of applause for tonight’s contestants, Jennifer and... er...
Robert.
(audience cheers)
The first round is a quick-fire, finger-on-the-buzzer game, the winner
wins no money in this round, but they will have first choice of our
selection of world-class jugglers to help them out in the following
rounds. So, Jenny and Bobby, fingers on the buzzers, best out of 5
juggling related questions wins. Ready?
Yes.
Me too.
Question one. What is the name of the founder of the Gandini Juggling
Project?... Jen!
Mr Gandini?
Er... I'm sorry but I can't give you that, I need the full name. Rob?
Fred?
Sorry, his name is Sean Gandini. No points to either of you. Second
question. What is the special prop that juggler Dan Menendez uses in his
musical juggling act? Jen.
A guitar.
No. Bob?
A piano.
Yes! One point to Robert. Come on, Jennifer, you can do this. Third
question. What endurance record did American juggler Sam Hartford break
that also broke the long-standing 5 club record? Rob!
4 clubs?
No... Jenny, can you jump in at this point?
5 balls.
Correct! For years the 5 club endurance record was longer than the 5 ball
record. Amazing. Jen, you have one point.
(applause)
Question four, fingers on the buzzers. Name the only juggler to perform a
5 ball bounce juggle while standing on his head... either of your? No
idea? Bob? Jenny, you should really take a guess at this one or else Bobby
may get ahead of you again.
Sorry, I've no idea.
Come on, BOBBY MAY win this round if you don't get it.
Um... Enrique Rastelli?
No, sorry. Robert, do you have any idea?
Steve Rawlings.
No. It was, of course, Bobby May. Last question, it is all down to whoever
is fastest here, that person will have the chance to have first choice
from our selection of jugglers to help them out here in the studio. Ok,
here goes. Complete the name of this troupe of 3 jugglers who performed
passing acts in the 70's and 80's: Air... what? Jen!
Air traffic control?
I'm very sorry, I have to pass the question over to Rob. Do you have any
idea, Robby?
I'm not sure, but I have an idea...
I'm going to have to hurry you.
Air Jazz.
Correct!
(audience applause)
I'm very sorry, Jennifer, you haven't won this round but no hard feelings,
I'll make it up to you later. Robert, by getting lucky over Jen you get to
choose your juggler to help you win more cash in the rest of the show. And
without further ado, lets meet these three world-class jugglers!
(audience begin applause)
Our first juggler is new to the show this series, he is an accomplished
numbers juggler, having success with 7 clubs and 11 balls. He is well
known for his original style of performance and off the wall antics on
various stages across the world. Please welcome... Luke Burrage!
(audience cheer as Luke strides in holding 7 fat rings and performs a
quick juggle)
Next up, with no expense spared, all the way from the United States, a
juggler who needs no introduction... Anthony Gatto!
(audience cheer as Anthony walks in juggling 3 clubs, dropping each club
in turn, catching them on his feet and kicking them up)
And finally, the big favorite from our last series, the bad boy of
juggling himself. Please give it up for... Nigel Green!
(audience go wild as Nigel struts in front of Luke and Anthony, glares at
the audience, holds out his hand and drops a single beanbag on the floor)
Right, we have our jugglers assembled. Robert will get to pick one of
these three to help him win cash for the rest of the show. Then Jennifer
will chose one of the remaining two. The last juggler will become the
House Juggler, entering the competitions alongside the chosen two in an
attempt to win the money back from the contestants. Robert, do you have
any idea who you are going to pick?
I'm not sure really...
There really isn't a right or wrong choice, you know what skills these
guys have but you don't know how they will be tested tonight.
Ok... I'll have Nigel.
(audience applaud)
Good choice, obviously a favorite with the crowds. Jennifer, who are you
going to have?
Well, I was really hoping to have Nigel for myself, he really is my
personal favorite...
I'm very sorry, Jenny, but you'll have to choose Anthony then.
Why not Luke?
When I said there wasn't a right or wrong I was trying not to hurt Luke's
feelings.
Ok, I'll pick ... Anthony.
(audience cheer)
That leaves Luke as our House Juggler, a great place for a new juggler to
prove himself on this show. A big round of applause for all our jugglers
here tonight!
(audience applaud)
Lets get straight into our first big cash winning round... 5 Ball Wipe
Out! I'm sure you all remember this game from last year... our jugglers
will start a 5 ball cascade and the longer they keep going, the more money
their contestant will win. To make this harder, every time Jen answers a
question correctly she gets a chance to challenge Nigel and Luke to do
progressively harder tricks. And of course, if Robert gets a question
correct, he challenges Anthony and Luke to do a trick without a drop.
But that means I have to do twice as much as Nigel and Anthony, right?
That's right, Luke. The last one left juggling wins the cash built up in
the time for either their contestant, or in your case, Luke, it goes back
into the cash bin. You have to work twice as hard to take the money
back... So, lets get one with the game... on your marks, start the clock,
JUGGLE!
(audience cheer as the jugglers start their 5 ball cascades)
Fingers on the buzzers, Jen and Rob... first question. What is the capital
of Brazil? Jenny!
Rio de Janero.
Incorrect... Rob!
Brazillia.
Correct! Name your challenge!
Um... a pirouette.
Go for it, Anthony and Luke!
(crowd cheer as Anthony does a perfect 5 up pirrouette and gasp as Luke
only just pulls off the 3 up version)
Well done, guys. The counter is up to 80 pounds already. Who was the
second man on the Moon? Jenny!
Major Tom.
No... Robert!
Buzz Aldrin.
Yes... your next challenge?
How about some backcrosses.
Luke, Anthony, off you go!
(croud applaud as Luke struggles with 5 backcrosses while Anthony runs
them smoothly)
Ok, the clock is up to 210 pounds. Jennifer, please think about your
answers from now on. Where did Yogi Bear live? Jen!
Yellowstone Park?
No, but oh so close. Rob?
Um... Jellystone Park?
Correct! Your next challenge?
How about a siteswap like 441?
Well technically that is a 3 ball trick... I guess 771 is a bit like more
like it, so Anthony and Luke, give that a go!
(audience cheer as Luke juggles into and back out of 771)
Anthony, you have to do it too.
Gee, my pop don't like that maths juggling so I'm not so good at them
there numbers...
I'm sorry, the challenge is there, you must attempt it... go on... you
can... oops, you dropped one there! Wipe Out!
(audience applaud)
Bad luck Tony and bad luck Jenny, it seems like Luke knocked you out of
this cash-winning round, already you are missing out on 375 pounds.
Woo hoo!
Luke, please be quiet. Now for the best part of this round. Robert, you
must name a new challenge, we ask you a question and if you get it right
Luke must perform the challenge alone. If you get it wrong, Nigel must do
it too. Got it?
So I have to do twice as much again?
Quiet please, Luke. Roberto, what is your challenge?
Reverse cascade.
Ok, what are the chemical symbols for silver and gold?
Au and Ag.
Very good, Robby. Luke, lets see you... oh well done!
(audience applaud)
The clock is already up to 575 pounds. Robert, what is your next challenge?
A shower.
The French Revolution happened in which year?
Um... 1750?
I'm sorry, the answer is 1789. Nigel, you've had an easy ride so far,
let's see your best 5 ball shower.
Ha, ha!
Very good, Luke, a nice shower there... and Nigel! Wipe Out!
(audience cheer)
Robert, you have just made Nigel drop, losing you 650 pounds...
Ow!
(audience boos as Nigel throws his juggling balls at Luke's groin)
Nigel, please keep you temper under wraps. Luke, get up off the floor.
I... can't... move...
(audience laugh)
So, at the end of the second round both our contestants are left with no
cash at all! I think this is the first time that the house juggler has won
the 5 Ball Wipeout, but it looks like Nigel made him pay..
So do I win the money?
No Luke, you get nothing.
Could I maybe have an icepack?
(audience laugh again)
Right now it’s time for a break. Stay with us for more incredible juggling
and the nail biting final rounds here on Catching Cash. For now we’ll
leave you with this week’s juggling conundrum! See you in part two!
(audience applause, music and VT roll. Camera’s zoom out and the following
appears:
Juggling Conundrum: QUILL IN CAVE
Call now and win a chance to appear on the next series of Catching Cash.)
----== posted via www.jugglingdb.com ==----
Aidan
we all know how dire that is! Also there's the problem of the general
public being able to name some tricks for a five ball juggler to do,
though I supposed they could be given a multiple choice. Somehow I think
there has to be better ways of promoting juggling.
Aidan.
Orinoco
> Project?... Jen!
>
> Mr Gandini?
>
> Er... I'm sorry but I can't give you that, I need the full name. Rob?
>
> Fred?
>
> Sorry, his name is Sean Gandini. No points to either of you. Second
> question.
I think the show needs better researchers. There were actually three
founders of the Gandini Juggling Project: Sean, Kati Yla-Hokkala & Gill
Clarke :P
> Juggling Conundrum: QUILL IN CAVE
> Call now and win a chance to appear on the next series of Catching Cash.)
Cinquevalli!
andrewdixon
hello
excuse my ignorance but who is nigel green?
regards
andrew
sean_
Nooooo!
shush or he might turn up.
Seán
P.s. he can throw throw two more than you
Brian Louisos
in America. Let me know if you can get ahold of any recordings of the
competition.
--Brian Louisos
Luke Burrage
> This sounds like a juggling version of that snooker quiz on the BBC, and
> we all know how dire that is!
Yup!
> Also there's the problem of the general
> public being able to name some tricks for a five ball juggler to do,
> though I supposed they could be given a multiple choice.
But this (fictional) script is set some time in a (fictional) paralell
universe where (fictional) jugglers exist as C-list celebrities. Also this
is the (fictional) first episode of a (fictional) second series. The
(fictional) contestants already know various 5 ball tricks from the
(fictional) game of 5 Ball Wipeout that they have watched and enjoyed in
the previous series.*
> Somehow I think
> there has to be better ways of promoting juggling.
Sure, but I can think of quite a lot of worse ways to promote juggling too!
This weekend while trawling through and sorting out old files on my
computer I found this script again but could not remember ever writing it.
When I read it again I wasn't exactly sure what was going to happen. My
guess is that I wrote this story over 3 years ago, in the spring of 2001,
shortly after N.J. Green first arrived and I never posted it then because
I didn't write part two.
I found lots of other interesting stuff too.
Luke Burrage
* The word "fictional" was added to this paragraph after it was completed
to clear up any confusion about how seriously the original script should
be taken.
Eccles
Luke Burrage wrote:
<snip>
> I found lots of other interesting stuff too.
Any chance of seeing any of it? That was highly entertaining. Well, it
certainly made my last hour of work go much faster than usual!
> Luke Burrage
>
> * The word "fictional" was added to this paragraph after it was completed
> to clear up any confusion about how seriously the original script should
> be taken.
Thanks for clearing that up, I was quite dissapointed I missed the first
series! :-)
JS