04/04/04

Tim Bruening

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 5:49:37 AM1/31/04

to

64 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 5:49:59 AM1/31/04

to

8 squared days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 5:50:20 AM1/31/04

to

4 cubed days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 5:50:43 AM1/31/04

to

2 to the 6th days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 5:51:03 AM1/31/04

to

2 months and 2 squared days to 04/04/04.

haslu

unread,

Jan 31, 2004, 10:51:03 AM1/31/04

to

Thanks for keeping the count!

"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message news:401B8841...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
64 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 1, 2004, 10:54:18 AM2/1/04

to

63 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 1, 2004, 10:28:02 PM2/1/04

to

7 x 9 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 1, 2004, 10:28:16 PM2/1/04

to

9 weeks to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 1, 2004, 10:28:28 PM2/1/04

to

3 squared weeks to 04/04/04.

Alan

unread,

Feb 1, 2004, 11:03:17 PM2/1/04

to

On Sun, 01 Feb 2004 19:28:28 -0800, Tim Bruening
<tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote:

>3 squared weeks to 04/04/04.

Tim, you seem to want to be number one poster awfully bad in the next
set of statistics.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 2, 2004, 12:32:55 AM2/2/04

to

3 x 21 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 4, 2004, 3:31:26 AM2/4/04

to

Just 2 months to 04/04/04! Let us soar on 04/04/04!

nemo

unread,

Feb 4, 2004, 11:49:16 AM2/4/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:4020ADDE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> Just 2 months to 04/04/04! Let us soar on 04/04/04!
>
>

Let us poo on 02/02/02!
Let us pee on 03/03/03!
Let us score on 04/04/04! (More fun!)
Let's be alive on 05/05/05!
Let's be sick on 06/06/06!
We'll all be in heaven on 07/07/07 - unless they catch all the Al Qaida etc.
buggers first, and if they do . . .
No more hate, by 08/08/08!
It'll all be fine by 09/09/09!

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 5, 2004, 1:22:54 AM2/5/04

to

nemo wrote:

Keep hope alive on 05/05/05!

Lets eat a hen on 10/10/10.

Make Earth like Heaven by 11/11/11.

Kiss some elves on 12/12/12.

nemo

unread,

Feb 5, 2004, 12:52:06 PM2/5/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:4021E13E...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

Is there a Newsgroup for that strange fetish, young man?!!

mike wheeELer

unread,

Feb 8, 2004, 3:26:53 AM2/8/04

to

In article <go9Ub.65861$pD4....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk>,
ne...@naughtylass2.wet, nemo was looking at the world oddly when:

It was the summer of love on 6/9/69..

Tim Bruening

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Feb 9, 2004, 3:38:22 AM2/9/04

to

mike wheeELer wrote:

But it was still spring!

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 9, 2004, 3:49:47 AM2/9/04

to

55 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 9, 2004, 3:49:59 AM2/9/04

to

5 x 11 days to 04/04/04.

nemo

unread,

Feb 9, 2004, 6:00:53 PM2/9/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:402746FE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

And it *would* still spring - to attention whenever necessary!

nemo

unread,

Feb 9, 2004, 6:02:57 PM2/9/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:402749B7...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> 5 x 11 days to 04/04/04.
>

4752000 seconds to 04/04/04. That's one hell of a lot of sub-standard goods!

Milton J. Smuthworthy, I

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 12:14:03 AM2/10/04

to

So then, "nemo" decided to add:

Yeah, and you know at the end they will have a "four for four" sale.
What kind of deal is that? I was suckered into one of those back on
03/04/03.

Milt

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 4:12:47 AM2/10/04

to

54 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 4:13:01 AM2/10/04

to

2 x 18 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 4:13:43 AM2/10/04

to

3 x 18 days to 04/04/04! Keep open the door on 04/04/04!

Tim Bruening

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 4:13:57 AM2/10/04

to

6 x 9 days 04/04/04!

nemo

unread,

Feb 10, 2004, 5:02:35 PM2/10/04

to

Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
news:4028680e$0$2097$45be...@newscene.com...

Up Tottenham Caught Road they easily get through that many sub-standard
goods in a day. " 'B' Grade" and "Grey Imports" mainly - that's electronic
goods imported by those little guys in flying saucers!

It's spelled "Tottenham Caught Road" coz that's what appens. Yer get caught!

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 15, 2004, 4:40:53 AM3/15/04

to

20 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 15, 2004, 4:41:12 AM3/15/04

to

2 x 10 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 15, 2004, 4:41:20 AM3/15/04

to

4 x 5 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 5:28:47 PM3/20/04

to

15 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 5:36:19 PM3/20/04

to

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:49:13 PM3/20/04

to

July: Why did July about Iraq, President Bush?

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:51:36 PM3/20/04

to

March of Dimes: 10 cents in the 3rd month.

Maybe: Bee in the 5th month.

Macing: 5th month song.

Maker: Dog in the 5th month.

Maiming: Chinese vase in the 5th month.

Mating: Bell in the 5th month.

June: Why is there never a Junetag sale?

July: Why did July about Iraq, President Bush?

August: Wind in the 8th month.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:54:41 PM3/20/04

to

Aiming: Chinese vase #1.

Beaming: Chinese vase #2. Contains buzzing insects.

Beating, Beeping: Bells #2: Contains buzzing insects.

C-Ming: A vase that seems to have lots of salt water.

C-ding: Bell that sows seeds in the sea.

C-ping: Bell that leaks salt water.

C-ting: Musical chair in the ocean.

D-ming: Chinese vase #4.

E-ting: Hungry bell on the Internet.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:55:45 PM3/20/04

to

Stalemate: Why people commit adultery.

Adultery: An acorn, all grown up.

Infantry: A newly planted sapling

Treason: A male sapling.

Sophistry: A tree with a built in seat.

Sophistry: Sophie's trying to deceive us into thinking she owns that
lumber.

Idolatry: To put a tree out of work.

Idolatry: to worship a forest.

Forest: in favor of holidays from work. Holidays: A light sauce.

Sauce: What happened when my wife returned early.

Telemetry: Repeating it three times!

Telemetry: "An Ash, an Oak, a Pine, a Birch, an Elder ... ", said the
teacher woodenly.

Poultry: Wood suitable for polish polish.

Conservatory: Save the rainforests! etc...

Tremendous: Excellent sapling repairers.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:56:45 PM3/20/04

to

Yuban: Forbid the 21st letter of the alphabet, and female sheep.

Cuban: Forbid the 17th letter, lines, and members of a superpowerful
Continuum.

Crossing Guard: One who protects motorists from kids who ignore the
light
(B.C. November 20, 2002).

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:57:11 PM3/20/04

to

Right Guard: One who protects stadium attendees from
football players in need of deodorant...

Left Guard: One who protects corporations from liberals and communists.

Deodorant: A sweet smelling ant.

Spearmint: Pointed gum.

Peppermint: Gum that makes you sneeze.

Shakespeare: Weapon held by a nervous soldier.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:58:31 PM3/20/04

to

Shakespeare: Weapon that writes plays

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 9:59:14 PM3/20/04

to

Crossing Guard: Guard who protected people from hearing Jesus sing
hymns during his Crucifixion.

Taliban: Forbid the census.

Suburban: Forbid living outside the city.

Urban: Prohibit cities.

Urban: Men only.

Incumbant: Not allowed to earn any money.

Incumbant: The ant in power.

Nincompoop. A poop without a nincome.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:03:24 PM3/20/04

to

Duction: Ignoring a duck.

Conduct: A duck held in the state pen.

Conduction: Ignoring a duck held in the state pen.

Reduction: Once again ignoring a duck held in the state pen.

Subtraction: Where a sub ends up when it breaks it's spine diving.

"Three Degrees Up Bubble": The group The 3 Degrees have a "Menage ą
Quatre"
with Bubble the stripper.

Subterfuge: What scientists use to separate the liquid from a sub.

Subterfuge: A sub spinning around with its rudder stuck.

Subordinate: What a sub's boring story did to someone named Nate.

Subordinate: Consuming the bum of a well known modern poet.

Peking: King of toilets.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:04:03 PM3/20/04

to

Submit: What the relief pitcher wears.

Submission: The church SUBWAY sandwich shop employees belong to.

Mitten: What the tin man's baseball glove is made of.

Commission: What they call the mission of Viagra. If that mission
succeeds, we get an emission.

Emission: Another church on the Internet.

Porpoise: bad muscular co-ordination or bad manners and/or social
graces.

Prince of Wales: Very large, aquatic footprints.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:04:14 PM3/20/04

to

Admission: Religious advertising.

Admit: Put on a glove.

Commission: A church on the Internet.

Mitten: The 10th glove.

Remit: Put on the glove again.

Submit: A very wet glove.

Submission: A church under water.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:04:32 PM3/20/04

to

Adverse: A hostile song.

Adversity: A hostile city.

Converse: Singing criminal(s).

Reverse: To sing again.

Attract: What a train runs on.

Contract: Criminal railroad.

Retract: To go on the train again.

Subtract: What subway trains run on.

Subtract: A train underwater.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:04:48 PM3/20/04

to

Advent: We need more ventilation.

Advent: Insert angry rant.

Adverse: Add a song.

Adverse: Singing comercial.

Attract Anorak: What an Alpine train runs on, in my a pinion!

Convent: Against angry rants.

Convent: A ranting criminal.

Converse: Against singing.

Contract: Against railroads.

Enginuity: A locomotive driver's pension.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:05:02 PM3/20/04

to

Circuit: An electrical knight.

Purloin: A price for each sex act.

Sirloin: A very sexy knight.

Surround: A very fat knight.

Survive: A living knight.

X-Mas: What happens at an alien church.

Congest: Against jokes.

Conquest: Against adventures.

Hiku: A government overthrow in a mountainous nation.

Baku: A sheep revolution.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 20, 2004, 10:05:16 PM3/20/04

to

Converse: Song about tennis shoes..

Converse: Song by or about criminals.

Adverse: Mathematical song.

Adverse: What they call the german who got the lowest score in math.

Adversity: What they call the german town that got the lowest score in
math.

Converse: What they call the german who's rated "the worse confidence
man".

Reverse: To sing again (actually to "...back up to the last chorus and
sing again").

Attract: The answer an indian gave to the question "Where's the train?"

Contract: What Godzilla ate at the Mexican restaurant (Chili Con tract)

Retract: To replace old railroad tracks.

Subtract: What underwater bloodhounds do to find lost submarines.

Engineers: What Native Americans hear with.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 20, 2004, 10:05:30 PM3/20/04

to

Circuit II: A set of components and instructions for building a Knight.

Cinarama: A Knight deciding whether to buy a new metal suit or spend his
money in a Whore House.

Projector: A hypodermic used by a Ho. Wurlitzer known fact that a lot of
them have habits. They'd catch cold otherwise.

Surance: Shouts a lot.

Sura: A Moslem Knight.

Saladin: A light lunch for same.

Surcingle: An unmarried Knight.

Surdez: That was his real name.

Surmount: A knight in the high country.

Surgery: Medical knight.

Servent: A knight in the pipes.

Serpent: A hissing knight.

Subtract: Whole neighborhood full of HUD housing...

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 21, 2004, 6:58:16 AM3/21/04

to

March of Dimes: 10 cents in the 3rd month.

Maybe: Bee in the 5th month.

Macing: 5th month song.

Maker: Dog in the 5th month.

Maiming: Chinese vase in the 5th month.

Mating: Bell in the 5th month.

June: Why is there never a Junetag sale?

August: Wind in the 8th month.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 21, 2004, 6:58:21 AM3/21/04

to

14 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 21, 2004, 6:58:25 AM3/21/04

to

2 x 7 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 21, 2004, 6:58:28 AM3/21/04

to

2 weeks to 04/04/04.

nemo

unread,

Mar 25, 2004, 4:19:38 PM3/25/04

to

They're quite a strain!

nemo

unread,

Mar 25, 2004, 4:21:16 PM3/25/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:405D02A9...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> July: Why did July about Iraq, President Bush?
>

Auuuu . . . gust because I felt like it!

Geordie the Forgery

unread,

Mar 25, 2004, 5:19:10 PM3/25/04

to

"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
news:K1I8c.165966$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...

>
> They're quite a strain!
>
>

They also have a few holes in them.
:-)
[don't strain yourself for a reply :-))]
Or there again, you could become religious.

artyw

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 7:59:19 AM3/26/04

to

"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message news:<K1I8c.165966$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk>...

> They're quite a strain!

I cant con seive why anybody would make one

KIMEVANS

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 8:22:27 AM3/26/04

to

"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
news:K1I8c.165966$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
>

> They're quite a strain!
>

> I know how you feel.....I cant stand eggbeater jokes,they leave me foaming

nemo

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 8:31:14 AM3/26/04

to

Geordie the Forgery <geord...@btinternet.com> wrote in message
news:c3vlsu$feo$1...@hercules.btinternet.com...

Puree-er, sir and puree-er, sir!

nemo

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 8:34:22 AM3/26/04

to

KIMEVANS <kime...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
news:n8W8c.125483$Wa.1...@news-server.bigpond.net.au...

That's merongue answer!

And I feel through the nerve-endings in my skin - the same as everyone else!

David Simpson

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 10:29:46 AM3/26/04

to

On Fri, 26 Mar 2004 13:34:22 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
furiously:

Are you blokes ever mixed up!

--
David
Remove "farook" to reply
At the bottom of the application where it says
"sign here". I put "Sagittarius"

nemo

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 2:59:45 PM3/26/04

to

David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
news:k2j860t8tjp200ha5...@4ax.com...

> On Fri, 26 Mar 2004 13:34:22 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
> furiously:
>
> >
> >KIMEVANS <kime...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
> >news:n8W8c.125483$Wa.1...@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
> >>
> >> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> >> news:K1I8c.165966$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> >> >
> >> > They're quite a strain!
> >> >
> >> > I know how you feel.....I cant stand eggbeater jokes,they leave me
> >foaming
> >>
> >That's merongue answer!
> >
> >And I feel through the nerve-endings in my skin - the same as everyone
else!
> >
> Are you blokes ever mixed up!
>

That's the hole eye, dear! To prove that the English language and the way
it's used is eggs tree melee mixable uppable!

Geordie the Forgery

unread,

Mar 26, 2004, 9:37:50 PM3/26/04

to

"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message

news:RY%8c.2376$Nv5...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...

I think that the Shakespeare play for this thread is:-
Omelette!

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 5:02:16 AM3/27/04

to

2 cubed days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 5:02:32 AM3/27/04

to

8 days to 04/04/04.

nemo

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 7:35:49 AM3/27/04

to

Geordie the Forgery <geord...@btinternet.com> wrote in message

news:c42pdt$nnl$1...@sparta.btinternet.com...

He also used to get very stiff from fearfully rushing about. He suffered
from panic-ache!

David Simpson

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 7:42:48 AM3/27/04

to

On Fri, 26 Mar 2004 09:03:27 -0800, J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com>
typed furiously:

>On Sat, 27 Mar 2004 01:59:46 +1030, David Simpson
><faro...@picknowl.com.au> found these unused words floating about:

>
>>On Fri, 26 Mar 2004 13:34:22 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
>>furiously:
>>
>>>
>>>KIMEVANS <kime...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
>>>news:n8W8c.125483$Wa.1...@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
>>>>
>>>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
>>>> news:K1I8c.165966$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
>>>> >
>>>> > They're quite a strain!
>>>> >
>>>> > I know how you feel.....I cant stand eggbeater jokes,they leave me
>>>foaming
>>>>
>>>That's merongue answer!
>>>
>>>And I feel through the nerve-endings in my skin - the same as everyone else!
>>>
>>Are you blokes ever mixed up!
>

>A sure sign of advancing age - they're whisk'rs!

Spat you la-la-laing about? Now we are more forked than ever.

nemo

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 2:11:55 PM3/27/04

to

J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
news:vq8b60dve67iehp2r...@4ax.com...
> On Sat, 27 Mar 2004 02:37:50 +0000 (UTC), "Geordie the Forgery"
> <geord...@btinternet.com> found these unused words floating about:

> For the Pepsi Generation, it's "Much ha' Dew about nothin' ... "

Fizzy drink for frogs: Croaker Cola!

nemo

unread,

Mar 27, 2004, 3:00:38 PM3/27/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:40655138...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> 8 days to 04/04/04.

How 4-full! - or is that an Italian moth?

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 29, 2004, 2:49:15 AM3/29/04

to

One week to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 29, 2004, 3:25:50 AM3/29/04

to

6 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 29, 2004, 3:26:01 AM3/29/04

to

2 x 3 days to 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:02:17 AM3/31/04

to

March of Dimes: 10 cents in the 3rd month.

Maybe: Bee in the 5th month.

Macing: 5th month song.

Maker: Dog in the 5th month.

Maiming: Chinese vase in the 5th month.

Mating: Bell in the 5th month.

June: Why is there never a Junetag sale?

July: Why did July about Iraq, President Bush?

August: Wind in the 8th month.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:01:11 AM3/31/04

to

dustbird wrote:

> Take a Haiku! Please!

Why should I take a government overthrow in the Andes?

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:04:14 AM3/31/04

to

Aiming: Chinese vase #1.

Beaming: Chinese vase #2. Contains buzzing insects.

Beating, Beeping: Bells #2: Contains buzzing insects.

C-Ming: A vase that seems to have lots of salt water.

C-ding: Bell that sows seeds in the sea.

C-ping: Bell that leaks salt water.

C-ting: Musical chair in the ocean.

D-ming: Chinese vase #4.

E-ting: Hungry bell on the Internet.

P-Ping: Bell #16, serves as a toilet.

T-Ming: Chinese vase #20, contains a stimulating beverage.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:05:15 AM3/31/04

to

Stalemate: Why people commit adultery.

Adultery: An acorn, all grown up.

Infantry: A newly planted sapling

Treason: A male sapling.

Sophistry: A tree with a built in seat.

Sophistry: Sophie's trying to deceive us into thinking she owns that
lumber.

Idolatry: To put a tree out of work.

Idolatry: to worship a forest.

Forest: in favor of holidays from work. Holidays: A light sauce.

Sauce: What happened when my wife returned early.

Telemetry: Repeating it three times!

Telemetry: "An Ash, an Oak, a Pine, a Birch, an Elder ... ", said the
teacher woodenly.

Poultry: Wood suitable for polish polish.

Conservatory: Save the rainforests! etc...

Tremendous: Excellent sapling repairers.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:05:32 AM3/31/04

to

Yuban: Forbid the 21st letter of the alphabet, and female sheep.

Cuban: Forbid the 17th letter, lines, and members of a superpowerful
Continuum.

Crossing Guard: One who protects motorists from kids who ignore the
light
(B.C. November 20, 2002).

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:05:44 AM3/31/04

to

Right Guard: One who protects stadium attendees from
football players in need of deodorant...

Left Guard: One who protects corporations from liberals and communists.

Deodorant: A sweet smelling ant.

Spearmint: Pointed gum.

Peppermint: Gum that makes you sneeze.

Shakespeare: Weapon held by a nervous soldier.

Tim Bruening

unread,

Mar 31, 2004, 3:05:57 AM3/31/04

to

Conceal: Against secrecy.

Concede: Against farming.

Confirm: A criminal enterprise.

Confront: A criminal money laundering enterprise.

Conrad: Against radioactive substances in our homes.

Format: In favor of floor coverings.

Forum: In favor of Bircardi.

Proceed: In favor of farming.

Procreate: Against evolution.

Profound: We found an expert!

Propane: In favor of torture.

Propane: In favor of windows.

Prorate: In favor of movie rating systems.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:06:24 AM3/31/04

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Shakespeare: Weapon that writes plays

Crossing Guard: Guard who protected people from hearing Jesus sing
hymns during his Crucifixion.

Taliban: Forbid the census.

Suburban: Forbid living outside the city.

Urban: Prohibit cities.

Urban: Men only.

Incumbant: Not allowed to earn any money.

Incumbant: The ant in power.

Nincompoop. A poop without a nincome.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:06:46 AM3/31/04

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Concave: Against spelunking.

Content: Against camping.

Contrail: Against hiking.

Contour: Against French bicycle races.

Produce: A supporter of Italian dictator Mussolini.

Protect: Favoring innovation.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:06:56 AM3/31/04

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Converse: Against music or poetry.

Converse: Poetry written by prison inmates

Conrail: The Great Train Robbery.

Contact: Doesn't believe in politeness.

Contort: Criminal lawyers, or being against lawsuits.

Contrail: A prisoner escape route or being against logging trails.

Probate: Favoring the fishing industry.

Profile: In favor of computers.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:08:07 AM3/31/04

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Console: Against shoes.

Pinesol: Sad shoe.

Pinesol: Shoe tree.

Pinesol: A sad household cleaner.

Joy: A happy household cleaner.

Lysol: An untruthful household cleaner.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:08:34 AM3/31/04

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Xenophobia: Fear of Xena Warrior Princess.

Comply: Wooden computers.

Compact: Small computers.

Compact: A computer treaty.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:08:54 AM3/31/04

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Reduce: The tennis game is tied again.

Reduce: Mussolini is back in power.

Subtract: A train underwater.

Duction: The process of becoming a duck.

Conduct: Against ducks.

Conduction: Against becoming a duck.

Reduction: To become a duck again.

Subtraction: How a sub pushes off against the ground.

Duct Tape: Used to tape together broken ducks.

Duct Tape: Recording of duck calls.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:09:05 AM3/31/04

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Duction: Ignoring a duck.

Conduct: A duck held in the state pen.

Conduction: Ignoring a duck held in the state pen.

Reduction: Once again ignoring a duck held in the state pen.

Subtraction: Where a sub ends up when it breaks it's spine diving.

"Three Degrees Up Bubble": The group The 3 Degrees have a "Menage ą
Quatre"
with Bubble the stripper.

Subterfuge: What scientists use to separate the liquid from a sub.

Subterfuge: A sub spinning around with its rudder stuck.

Subordinate: What a sub's boring story did to someone named Nate.

Subordinate: Consuming the bum of a well known modern poet.

Peking: King of toilets.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:09:43 AM3/31/04

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Submit: What the relief pitcher wears.

Submit: Mermaid's glove.

Mermaid: Underwater domestic worker.

Submission: The church SUBWAY sandwich shop employees belong to.

Mitten: What the tin man's baseball glove is made of.

Commission: What they call the mission of Viagra. If that mission
succeeds, we get an emission.

Emission: Another church on the Internet.

Porpoise: bad muscular co-ordination or bad manners and/or social
graces.

Prince of Wales: Very large, aquatic footprints.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:11:06 AM3/31/04

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Admission: Religious advertising.

Admit: Put on a glove.

Commission: A church on the Internet.

Mitten: The 10th glove.

Omit: Delete the glove.

Permit: Price of a glove.

Remit: Put on the glove again.

Submit: A very wet glove.

Submission: A church under water.

Testament: Try out the glove before you buy it.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:11:19 AM3/31/04

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Adverse: A hostile song.

Adversity: A hostile city.

Converse: Singing criminal(s).

Reverse: To sing again.

Attract: What a train runs on.

Contract: Criminal railroad.

Retract: To go on the train again.

Subtract: What subway trains run on.

Subtract: A train underwater.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:11:47 AM3/31/04

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Advent: We need more ventilation.

Advent: Insert angry rant.

Adverse: Add a song.

Adverse: Singing comercial.

Convent: Against angry rants.

Convent: A ranting criminal.

Converse: Against singing.

Contract: Against railroads.

Enginuity: A locomotive driver's pension.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:12:12 AM3/31/04

to

Circuit: An electrical knight.

Purloin: A price for each sex act.

Sirloin: A very sexy knight.

Surround: A very fat knight.

Survive: A living knight.

X-Mas: What happens at an alien church.

Congest: Against jokes.

Conquest: Against adventures.

Baku: A sheep revolution.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:12:27 AM3/31/04

to

Converse: Song about tennis shoes..

Converse: Song by or about criminals.

Adverse: Mathematical song.

Adverse: What they call the german who got the lowest score in math.

Adversity: What they call the german town that got the lowest score in
math.

Converse: What they call the german who's rated "the worse confidence
man".

Reverse: To sing again (actually to "...back up to the last chorus and
sing again").

Attract: The answer an indian gave to the question "Where's the train?"

Contract: What Godzilla ate at the Mexican restaurant (Chili Con tract)

Retract: To replace old railroad tracks.

Subtract: What underwater bloodhounds do to find lost submarines.

Engineers: What Native Americans hear with.

Tim Bruening

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Mar 31, 2004, 3:12:38 AM3/31/04

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Circuit II: A set of components and instructions for building a Knight.

Cinarama: A Knight deciding whether to buy a new metal suit or spend his
money in a Whore House.

Projector: A hypodermic used by a Ho. Wurlitzer known fact that a lot of
them have habits. They'd catch cold otherwise.

Surance: Shouts a lot.

Sura: A Moslem Knight.

Saladin: A light lunch for same.

Surcingle: An unmarried Knight.

Surdez: That was his real name.

Surmount: A knight in the high country.

Surgery: Medical knight.

Servent: A knight in the pipes.

Serpent: A hissing knight.

Subtract: Whole neighborhood full of HUD housing...

James King

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Mar 31, 2004, 9:01:12 AM3/31/04

to

In article <406A7D1A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>, Tim Bruening
<tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote:

> Admission: Religious advertising.

OR advertising that pursuades you to stay away from unmarried women.

> Testament: Try out the glove before you buy it.

OR what you do when you find that 3 year old box of Altoids.

Firmament: What you eat when you're tired of soft, chewy candy like
Mentos.

Monument: Bob Marley asking for some candy.

James King

Tim Bruening

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Apr 19, 2004, 3:17:17 AM4/19/04

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Tim Bruening

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Apr 19, 2004, 3:17:34 AM4/19/04

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Automotive: Why the car killed.

Carnivore: A meat eating car.

Carpet: What cars like to rub.

Car Pool: Where cars swim.

Cartoon: A musical car.

Karma: My mother the car.

Carisma: My mother the hypnotic car!

Carson: Son of Karma or Carisma.

Honda, Mazda: Possible fathers of Carson.

Carting: Ringing automobile.

nemo

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Apr 19, 2004, 4:09:25 PM4/19/04

to

Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:40837D0E...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

Carpet? OK.

Axminster: To abolish a cathedral, especially for economic or political
reasons.

Tim Bruening

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Apr 25, 2004, 12:49:57 PM4/25/04

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21 days since 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

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Apr 25, 2004, 12:50:21 PM4/25/04

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3 x 7 days since 04/04/04.

Tim Bruening

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Apr 25, 2004, 12:50:43 PM4/25/04

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3 weeks since 04/04/04.