French in Ireland
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 17:06:37 GMT, "J H Lowy" <jhl...@optonline.net>
> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> >>
> >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> >> >
> >> >
> >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland. They are
> >> called Ulster Onionists.
> >> >
> >> And they speak Garlic??
> >>
> >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit of
> >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> >>
> >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> >
> Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
Antwerp: A social insect going faster than light?
Tim Bruening
Nick Bell wrote:
> "nemo" wrote ...
> |
> | Nick Bell wrote ...
> | >
> | >
> | > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland. They are
> | called Ulster Onionists.
> | >
> | And they speak Garlic??
> |
> | It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit of
> | contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> |
> |
> |
> Sounds worse than the march down Portabello Road. Things just mushroom there.
Ireland: Where the people are angry.
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 16:27:08 -0700, "Nick Bell"
> <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >
> >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message news:q3bsmv0f1bljm440a...@4ax.com...
> >| On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 17:06:37 GMT, "J H Lowy" <jhl...@optonline.net>
> >| found these unused words floating about:
> >|
> >| >"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> >| >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> >| >>
> >| >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> >| >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> >| >> >
> >| >> >
> >| >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland. They are
> >| >> called Ulster Onionists.
> >| >> >
> >| >> And they speak Garlic??
> >| >>
> >| >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit of
> >| >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> >| >>
> >| >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> >| >
> >| Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
> >|
> >First they have to put on warppaint.
> >
> That's an enterprising solution once tried by Holland Oats.
How Quark-y!
nemo
Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:4033297B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
Bought a pack of very long Joss Sticks once down Portabello Road, or
Portobello Road even. I was a Waffic Trarden at the time and had the dreaded
police trousers on complete with truncheon pocket.
Almost exclusively, people would buy Joss Sticks down there to drown the
fumes of Ganja. This was in the days when you could get 5 years for
posession of a couple of grams, so you can imagine the expression on the
ponim of the guy sellin 'em when I slipped the 1ft-long packet into my
pocket.
Rastafarian in charge of the ancient scrolls: Torah's clark!
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So chief "nemo" says to the guy::
>
>Almost exclusively, people would buy Joss Sticks down there to drown the
>fumes of Ganja.
Hey Greg - did you catch that? I don't see no trademark!
Milt
Greg Evans
>> Almost exclusively, people would buy Joss Sticks down there to drown
>> the fumes of Ganja.
>
> Hey Greg - did you catch that? I don't see no trademark!
Catch what? Do I look like either a lawyer *or* a catcher?
Greg
or a belly-scratcher?
jhl
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So chief "Greg Evans" says to the guy:
>
>>> Almost exclusively, people would buy Joss Sticks down there to drown
>>> the fumes of Ganja.
>>
>> Hey Greg - did you catch that? I don't see no trademark!
>
>Catch what? Do I look like either a lawyer *or* a catcher?
I thought "Fumes of Ganja" would be a great name for your new band. But
I forgot it's not a Calypso band. Nevermind.
>Greg
>or a belly-scratcher?
..or a belly-scratcher's son? But will you scratch the belly 'till the
belly-scratcher comes?
Milt
Greg Evans
> I thought "Fumes of Ganja" would be a great name for your new band.
I bet it's been done....
> But will you scratch the belly 'till the
> belly-scratcher comes?
Depends on if she's cute or not.
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So chief "Greg Evans" says to the guy:
>
>> I thought "Fumes of Ganja" would be a great name for your new band.
>
>I bet it's been done....
Oh, right. I see why you're the band-name spotter.
>> But will you scratch the belly 'till the
>> belly-scratcher comes?
>
>Depends on if she's cute or not.
Oh, yes. You can bet she's cute or not.
Milt
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
news:4034e263$0$5715$45be...@newscene.com...
Milton: Very heavy flour-grinding apparatus! - he said with great Timerity!
Diane Tudhope
You lot certainly know how to brighten a dull day!! Thanks!
nemo
Diane Tudhope <dianet...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:33707ebf.04022...@posting.google.com...
Yessss! FLOODLIGHTS!!!!
Felicity
I've got this itch needin' a scratch...
David Simpson
typed furiously:
Bright Sparks Anonymous.
--
David
Remove "farook" to reply
At the bottom of the application where it says
"sign here". I put "Sagittarius"
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the bartender:
>
>Milton: Very heavy flour-grinding apparatus! - he said with great
>Timerity!
Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered for a
while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
Milt
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "Felicity" says to the bartender:
Then try Itchy and Scratchy:
http://www.itchyandscratchy.dk/
Milt
Greg Evans
>>> But will you scratch the belly 'till the
>>> belly-scratcher comes?
>> Depends on if she's cute or not.
>
> I've got this itch needin' a scratch...
Me-YOW!!
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
He'd got awful diarrhoa
Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
He just had to use a potty
Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
MosZibby
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
Dat wuz gud. Dey sing de blus in de UK?
Felicity
I know! And I can't fit into the suit no more. DAMN!
ynotssor
news:103g4i2...@corp.supernews.com
>>> So then "nemo" says to the bartender:
>>>> Milton: Very heavy flour-grinding apparatus! - he said with great
>>>> Timerity!
>>> Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered
>>> for a while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
>>>
>> OK. Blues you want?
>>
>> Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
>> Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
>> He'd got awful diarrhoa
>> Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
>> He just had to use a potty
>> Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
>
> Dat wuz gud. Dey sing de blus in de UK?
Only in lieu of a blew loo.
--
-----= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =-----
http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World!
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Greg Evans
>> Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered
>> for a while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
>>
> OK. Blues you want?
> Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
Q: What's the last song a bluesman ever sings?
A: "Well, I didn't wake up this mornin'...."
Greg Evans
>> Me-YOW!!
>
> I know! And I can't fit into the suit no more. DAMN!
Such a cat-astrophe....
nemo
MosZibby <Naked@YourHouse> wrote in message
>
We sing anything over here. We're not fussy. I'm listenin to Monteverdi
madrigals at the moment. Very roood if you know what they mean by death!
And with Tony B'Liar as Prime Monister we gotta damned good excuse to sing
the blues!
I gotta ole Yamahahaha keyboard an I like improvisin on blues-type tunes.
I started messin about with variations on Summer Time once. After about 90
minutes or so the neighbours banged on the wall and shouted, "For Christ's
sake play something else!"!
I did. Colonel Bogey!
nemo
ynotssor <"ynotssor"> wrote in message
news:40381...@corp.newsgroups.com...
> "MosZibby" <Naked@YourHouse> wrote in message
> news:103g4i2...@corp.supernews.com
>
> >>> So then "nemo" says to the bartender:
> >>>> Milton: Very heavy flour-grinding apparatus! - he said with great
> >>>> Timerity!
> >>> Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered
> >>> for a while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
> >>>
> >> OK. Blues you want?
> >>
> >> Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
> >> Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
> >> He'd got awful diarrhoa
> >> Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
> >> He just had to use a potty
> >> Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
> >
> > Dat wuz gud. Dey sing de blus in de UK?
>
> Only in lieu of a blew loo.
>
findin stone white paratroopers in the parkin bays outside!
Some other milly tory type set up home in my toilet once and wanted to pay
me rent. When I asked him what he thought he was doing he said he was a
leiutenant!
nemo
David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
news:cujd30tumemn3pvhq...@4ax.com...
That's van de, Graff.
Tesla another one.
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then the third native "nemo" says:
>
>I gotta ole Yamahahaha keyboard an I like improvisin on blues-type tunes.
Does it have sustainnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn?
How about echo o o o o o o o o o o o?
Or a sequencer Or a sequencer Or a sequencer Or a sequencer?
Milt
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then the third native "nemo" says:
>> >
>> >Timerity!
>> Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered for a
>> while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
>>
>OK. Blues you want?
>
>Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
>Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
>He'd got awful diarrhoa
>Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
>He just had to use a potty
>Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
Take it on down boys... chord|chord|chord|...
Well I got holes in my sneakas, (Greg/Larry: Yeah man Hey)
lookin' fo' that ol' Nemo... (Liz: yeeeeeeeeee hah) ...eoeo,
Oh, I got dem holes in my sneakers, babe, (Alan: what a damn shame)
fo' makin' me mess that outhouse flo'. (David: sing the song, brother)
Now if I eva catch that cowboy, (Tony: oh tell the folks now) (break)
Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, (Hey! Yeah brother! whistles) (Chord!)
I say, Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii (Oh tell the story! shouts, screams, Mos farts) (Chord!)
I gonna throw... I say
I gonna thro o o o o ow (heart attacks, puking) o-o-o-o-o-o-ow...
him down that outhouse hole.
<ba-dump>
Milt
``
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then the third native "MosZibby" says:
>"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
>news:ToTZb.123606$cL.6...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
>>
>> Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
>> He'd got awful diarrhoa
>> Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
>> He just had to use a potty
>> Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
>
>Dat wuz gud. Dey sing de blus in de UK?
Well I woke up this mornin' around eightish,
There was Bertha being a bit of a sport.
Oh I say there old boy, (congregation: eh wat)
Egad that Bertha is a sticky wicket.
If I meet for tea with Bertha later,
It probably will be after around sixish.
Milt
Tim Bruening
Irish oui knew more French.
MosZibby
"Greg Evans" <gregIGN...@charter.BLATHER.net> wrote in message
news:103ganh...@corp.supernews.com...
Den dare be no mo Leadbelly.
MosZibby
"ynotssor" <"ynotssor"> wrote in message
news:40381...@corp.newsgroups.com...
> news:103g4i2...@corp.supernews.com
>
> >>> So then "nemo" says to the bartender:
> >>>> Milton: Very heavy flour-grinding apparatus! - he said with great
> >>>> Timerity!
> >>> Nemo: Sidekick of someone who a blues musician hasn't encountered
> >>> for a while. "Ain't seen that guy an' Nemo."
> >>>
> >> OK. Blues you want?
> >>
> >> Oh aah woke erp wun morniyn
> >> Saw diss guy Milt on a poe.
> >> He'd got awful diarrhoa
> >> Coz he'd bin poisoned by Nemoeoeoe.
> >> He just had to use a potty
> >> Coz 'ee 'ad nowhere else to go!!
> >
> > Dat wuz gud. Dey sing de blus in de UK?
>
> Only in lieu of a blew loo.
You is blue, you is blue, cause the loo
no more works fo' yu....
MosZibby
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
Please, not a Nikola one.
Palema
Isn't that a bit late for tea? May the fourish be with you
Elisabeth Müller
<mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote:
>Milton J. Smuthworthy, I wrote:
>
>>> Almost exclusively, people would buy Joss Sticks down there to drown
>>> the fumes of Ganja.
>>
>> Hey Greg - did you catch that? I don't see no trademark!
>
>Catch what? Do I look like either a lawyer *or* a catcher?
>
>Greg
>or a belly-scratcher?
What a pity. I'd have liked that.
David Simpson
furiously:
Who wrote rude things on the van?
Greg Evans
>> Do I look like either a lawyer *or* a catcher?
>> or a belly-scratcher?
>
> What a pity. I'd have liked that.
I'm not into that whole scratching scene. Massage is more my style.
Greg
rub-a-dub-dub
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then the second native Palema says:
>
>> If I meet for tea with Bertha later,
>> It probably will be after around sixish.
>
Beats me. I only know about the British from watching Hogan's Heroes.
>May the fourish be with you
May a Jedi tennish master Leia.
Milt
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
.4 . .
(Echoing back through the Anus of Thyme!).
<serious description therefore OT >
Cost me around £1100 and that was a hell of a lot of money in those days. I
got it with some of my Unfair Dismissal money when I was fired from the
Traffic Wardens for daring to try to report a safety hazard!!!! After all -
I was only the Trades Union accredited Health and Safety Representative - so
what did they want I should do? Ignore it? So instead of getting rid of the
hazard they got rid of me! I got £2500 compensation - the highest ever
award for a basic-grade employee in those days.
It's got sustain, chorus and ensemble but no echo, little sir, and the
sequencer records stuff onto an ordinary audio cassette like an old
fashioned computer! The drum section is pretty good too. The drums are
digitally recorded. It's only got touch sensitivity on the solo voices
though - and don't laugh, the microprocessor that runs it is a Zilog Z80B
running at 6MHz. Sounds good though. Uses the same FM synthesis system as
the famous DX7 only with four operators instead of seven.
It's got a MIDI interface so I can also play it from my little Yam SHS-10
guitar-shaped keyboard thingy too.
Bargain of the century that. An excellent instrument but it looks too much
like a toy and never sold. It came out at £179.99, got rave reviews in the
magazines but still nobody bought it. I got mine about a year later for
£69.99 from Argos reduced from £119.99 for Christmas! Not bad at all.
I've also got an Italian style Inner Case harpsichord too - built from an
Early Music Centre kit, but I can't be bothered tuning it. Takes up half the
blasted living room. I'll get round to flogging it one day.
And after all that, my favorite instrument is still the Recorder. I can play
along to Klezmer stuff on a Sopranino for hours!
</OT serious description>
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then the second native "nemo" says:
>
><serious description therefore OT >
<snip. Glad you were redeemed by the Gov>
>
>It's got sustain, chorus and ensemble but no echo, little sir, and the
>sequencer records stuff onto an ordinary audio cassette like an old
>fashioned computer! The drum section is pretty good too. The drums are
>digitally recorded. It's only got touch sensitivity on the solo voices
>though - and don't laugh, the microprocessor that runs it is a Zilog
>Z80B running at 6MHz. Sounds good though. Uses the same FM synthesis
>system as the famous DX7 only with four operators instead of seven.
I bet you can get some great sounds out of that. I have a DX7 and it's
still a boss ax. Great percussion, especially elec. piano. Takes
punishment too.
>It's got a MIDI interface so I can also play it from my little Yam
>SHS-10 guitar-shaped keyboard thingy too.
Great for doing your choreography when you perform. <g>
<snip>
>I've also got an Italian style Inner Case harpsichord too - built from
>an Early Music Centre kit, but I can't be bothered tuning it. Takes up
>half the blasted living room. I'll get round to flogging it one day.
Then you can play all three popular harpsichord songs in the last
50 years! Calcutta, Love is Blue and ... hmmm, make that two.
>And after all that, my favorite instrument is still the Recorder.
"And now, Nemo will play the Recorder." (SNL bit with Gilda Radner as
"Francine.")
>I can
>play along to Klezmer stuff on a Sopranino for hours!
I don't see why the neighbors wouldn't like that!
</OT serious description>
Milt
David Simpson
furiously:
I hope they were those Standard rude things. (I used to drive a
Vanguard)
nemo
you!
just wondering
So how did your Van Gogh?
nemo
just wondering <fmh...@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:SrM_b.114090$jk2.503231@attbi_s53...
(FX: B - Bang!!)
That's not what I meant! Put that 12 boor away sir!
OK. Earwig "O" . . .
How many more times and other mum-telling-off-naughty-child-type
expressions? - It's och as in "Loch"!!
Malcolm Hoar
He's as thick as a post. A post-impressionist, in fact.
The Van didn't Gogh. No Monet to buy Degas.
--
|~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|
| Malcolm Hoar "The more I practice, the luckier I get". |
| ma...@malch.com Gary Player. |
| http://www.malch.com/ Shpx gur PQN. |
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
nemo
Malcolm Hoar <ma...@malch.com> wrote in message
news:c1g5na180...@news.supernews.com...
And thick? Did he use imp has toe technique?
Greg Evans
>>> David Simpson wrote:
>>>> On Mon, 23 Feb 2004 22:46:01 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet>
>>>> typed furiously:
>>>>> David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>>>>>> typed furiously:
>>>>>>> David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>>>>>>>> Tudhope) typed furiously:
>>>>>>>>> "jhl" <jhl...@optonline.net> wrote in message
>>>>>>>>>> message news:4033294B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>>>>>>>>>>> "J. A. Mc." wrote:
>>>>>>>>>>>> jhl...@optonline.net> found these unused words floating about:
>>>>>>>>>>>>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
>>>>>>> Ireland.
>>>>>>>>>> They are
>>>>>>>>>> called Ulster Onionists.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>> And they speak Garlic??
>>>>>>>>>>>>>> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Slightest bit of
>>>>>>>>>>>>>> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
>>>>>>>>>>>>> Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
>>>>>>>>>>>> Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
>>>>>>>>>>> Antwerp: A social insect going faster than light?
>>>>>>>>>> Love it! Thank you.
>>>>>>>>> You lot certainly know how to brighten a dull day!! Thanks!
>>>>>>>> Bright Sparks Anonymous.
>>>>>> Who wrote rude things on the van?
>>>>> the van guard?
>>>> I hope they were those Standard rude things. (I used to drive a
>>>> Vanguard)
>>> So how did your Van Gogh?
>> He's as thick as a post. A post-impressionist, in fact.
>> The Van didn't Gogh. No Monet to buy Degas.
>
> Oy! You said that Daliberately!
> And thick? Did he use imp has toe technique?
I ges so.
Malcolm Hoar
Yes Sir, really!
Ray
Ray
David Simpson
furiously:
Now I know why I always seemed to be out in front. I thought it was
just a rather quick car.
Tim Bruening
Nick Bell wrote:
> nemo wrote in message...
> |
> | Nick Bell wrote in message
> | >
> | >
> | > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland. They are
> | called Ulster Onionists.
> | >
> | And they speak Garlic??
> |
> They are wondering where the leek came from.
You're wet!
David Simpson
typed furiously:
(Mona Lisa smile)
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
>
> So then the second native "nemo" says:
> >
> ><serious description therefore OT >
> <snip. Glad you were redeemed by the Gov>
> >
> >It's got sustain, chorus and ensemble but no echo, little sir, and the
> >sequencer records stuff onto an ordinary audio cassette like an old
> >fashioned computer! The drum section is pretty good too. The drums are
> >digitally recorded. It's only got touch sensitivity on the solo voices
> >though - and don't laugh, the microprocessor that runs it is a Zilog
> >Z80B running at 6MHz. Sounds good though. Uses the same FM synthesis
> >system as the famous DX7 only with four operators instead of seven.
>
> I bet you can get some great sounds out of that. I have a DX7 and it's
> still a boss ax. Great percussion, especially elec. piano. Takes
> punishment too.
I know. I've seen a number of almost wrecked DX7s in second hand shops that
still worked OK.
>
> >It's got a MIDI interface so I can also play it from my little Yam
> >SHS-10 guitar-shaped keyboard thingy too.
>
> Great for doing your choreography when you perform. <g>
I just play for my own amusement. I haven't performed in ages. Cound be
Vitamin E defficiency ice up hose (brrr!).
>
> <snip>
> >I've also got an Italian style Inner Case harpsichord too - built from
> >an Early Music Centre kit, but I can't be bothered tuning it. Takes up
> >half the blasted living room. I'll get round to flogging it one day.
>
> Then you can play all three popular harpsichord songs in the last
> 50 years! Calcutta, Love is Blue and ... hmmm, make that two.
Don't know about those, but I can manage a very few of Bach's preludes and
fugues and a fair bit of really ancient stuff like William Byrde, John Bull
etc. D. Scarlatti is beyond my capabilities though, unless I can find a way
of contracting dierrhoea of teh fingers!
I can manage a few of Bach's organ pieced too, but it's damned difficult
playing the pedal part with your left hand, because with your right hand up
the other end you have to play the left hand part with your nose!
>
> >And after all that, my favorite instrument is still the Recorder.
>
> "And now, Nemo will play the Recorder." (SNL bit with Gilda Radner as
> "Francine.")
>
> >I can
> >play along to Klezmer stuff on a Sopranino for hours!
>
> I don't see why the neighbors wouldn't like that!
I live in Camden Town, not Golder's Green.
The guy upstairs certainly doesn't. He belongs to the Kingdom of Islam sect.
When he lets his kids stamp about I bung it on and he puts them in another
room quicksharp in case demons start sprouting up out of the floor!
Miserable little sod he is. If you wanted to strip paint from off of a wall,
you could hire him to stare at it!
>
>
> Milt
nemo
Greg Evans <mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote in message
news:c1ge29$1i1l7v$1...@ID-159999.news.uni-berlin.de...
So he slaked his thirst and got Plastered in Paris!
nemo
nemo
On an application form it said "Sex." I put: "Not very often these days.
It's old age you know!"
Was it a van, a car or a car or van towed by a vancar?
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the farmer:
>> >
>> Great for doing your choreography when you perform. <g>
>
>I just play for my own amusement. I haven't performed in ages. Cound be
>Vitamin E defficiency ice up hose (brrr!).
Seems like a lot of trouble. Why not just take a pill?
>> >I've also got an Italian style Inner Case harpsichord too - built from
>> >an Early Music Centre kit, but I can't be bothered tuning it. Takes up
>> >half the blasted living room.
You should have blasted a little more.
>> Then you can play all three popular harpsichord songs in the last
>
>Don't know about those, but I can manage a very few of Bach's preludes
How many do you take before the real ludes? I mean, after all, we're
talking Bach.
>
>I can manage a few of Bach's organ pieced too, but it's damned difficult
>playing the pedal part with your left hand, because with your right hand up
>the other end you have to play the left hand part with your nose!
Maybe you should stick to the boogie woogie. Besides, Bach put those
pedal notes about 3 inches below the page number. How the heck can
you figure them out?
I was, no kidding aside, a church organist for a while. But they
complained that I played everything too fast. Well, is it my fault
they couldn't turn the pages fast enough? Besides, it's fun playing
"Woolly Bully" on a floored 7 manual pipe organ and watching choir
members shoot out of the loft. That congregation just didn't appreciate
real entertainment.
>> I don't see why the neighbors wouldn't like that!
>
>The guy upstairs certainly doesn't. He belongs to the Kingdom of Islam sect.
>When he lets his kids stamp about I bung it on and he puts them in another
>room quicksharp in case demons start sprouting up out of the floor!
>Miserable little sod he is. If you wanted to strip paint from off of a wall,
>you could hire him to stare at it!
Well, no wonder with all that blasting in your living room! I heard
on a BBC broadcast that they are planning to take over the world.
Maybe they just don't like harpsichord music.
Milt
David Simpson
furiously:
>
>David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>news:ub9n30t2gdvvduk60...@4ax.com...
>> On Tue, 24 Feb 2004 14:53:33 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
>> furiously:
>> >> Vanguard)
>> >>
>> >Must have held up the traffic with all those soldiers following on behind
>> >you!
>> >
>> Now I know why I always seemed to be out in front. I thought it was
>> just a rather quick car.
>>
>> "sign here". I put "Sagittarius"
>
>On an application form it said "Sex." I put: "Not very often these days.
>It's old age you know!"
>
application forms in this state. (The question not the answer) It
might encourage sexual discrimination, disfunction or sumfin'. As if
the interviewer can't tell what sex you are anyway ... actually ...
now I think about it ... sometimes it is hard to tell.
>Was it a van, a car or a car or van towed by a vancar?
>
1. 1951 Vanguard Station Wagon (Laycock overdrive). New.
2. 1955 Vanguard Station Wagon (Laycock overdrive). New.
3. 1960 Vanguard Panel Van. (Laycock overdrive) New.
4. In 1958, 1928 Willy's Whippet. £5.
5. In 1963, 1956 Morris Major Series 1. £500
6. In 1966, 1955 Vanguard Panel Van. ($100)
Nos. 1, 2 and 3 belonged to my Father.
We towed caravans with most of them except the Whippet.
I learnt to drive at the age of twelve. Couldn't get a license until I
turned eighteen though. Most frustrating.
--
David
Remove "farook" to reply
At the bottom of the application where it says
nemo
Anyway -
Laycock overdrive? Harm can come to a young lad like that. Supposing it gets
caught in the cogwheels - or is that a matter of a pinion?
My vehicular record goes: (can't remember the dates)
Honda CB175 - took my test on it then . .
BMW R75/6 - wore that out despatch riding.
Honda CB250 G5 - a bit gutless so swapped it with £300 cash for
Suzuki CS550. Best of the lot, that. Fast, comfortable and handled like a
dream.
Sold that after my near misses to date indicated how much the standard of
driving was deteriorating and how dangerous biking was becoming! The
sacrifices you have to make because of idiots! (Present company excepted.)
Near misses?? Yup. I changed my mind at the altar!
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
If that's what they think they're going to do, harpsichord music would seem
a little too delicate to them - and Klezmer?? Should make their heads
explode. What a pity it doesn't! It'd be Mars Attacks all over again!
Their favorite music is probably Heavy Mental - judging by the behaviour of
the little sod upstairs!
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the farmer:
>>
>> on a BBC broadcast that they are planning to take over the world.
>> Maybe they just don't like harpsichord music.
>>
>Agreed. Starting with Camden Town!
>
>If that's what they think they're going to do, harpsichord music would
>seem a little too delicate to them - and Klezmer?? Should make their
>heads explode. What a pity it doesn't! It'd be Mars Attacks all over
>again!
Except instead of "Ack! Ack!" it would be
"Owaheeaheeaheeoowah..Splush!"
>Their favorite music is probably Heavy Mental - judging by the
>behaviour of the little sod upstairs!
I think those guys are into fusion.
Milt
David Simpson
furiously:
>
>David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>news:mepq30huha4i76nv5...@4ax.com...
>My vehicular record goes: (can't remember the dates)
>
>Honda CB175 - took my test on it then . .
>BMW R75/6 - wore that out despatch riding.
>Honda CB250 G5 - a bit gutless so swapped it with £300 cash for
>Suzuki CS550. Best of the lot, that. Fast, comfortable and handled like a
>dream.
>
>Sold that after my near misses to date indicated how much the standard of
>driving was deteriorating and how dangerous biking was becoming! The
>sacrifices you have to make because of idiots! (Present company excepted.)
>
I once had a motorcycle. I would have ridden it too but I could never
get the motor to run for more than a few seconds.
>Near misses?? Yup. I changed my mind at the altar!
>
Never mind. It could have been a hit.
--
David
Remove "farook" to reply
At the bottom of the application where it says
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
ceiling as a trampolie and he came down and bashed on my door - until a
broom handle misteriously emerged from the letter box at very high speed and
caught him right in the Solar Plexus! (^!^)
New clear fission's probably more to his taste - if he could get hold of the
Pluto Neum - but Walt Disney wont give 'im any.
He's got all the Integrated Circuits he needs for the firing circuitry
though. Fission Chips!
http://www.israel-music.com/?product=983
nemo
> On Thu, 26 Feb 2004 14:58:33 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
> furiously:
>
> >
> >David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
> >news:mepq30huha4i76nv5...@4ax.com...
> >My vehicular record goes: (can't remember the dates)
> >
> >Honda CB175 - took my test on it then . .
> >BMW R75/6 - wore that out despatch riding.
> >Honda CB250 G5 - a bit gutless so swapped it with £300 cash for
> >Suzuki CS550. Best of the lot, that. Fast, comfortable and handled like a
> >dream.
> >
> >Sold that after my near misses to date indicated how much the standard of
> >driving was deteriorating and how dangerous biking was becoming! The
> >sacrifices you have to make because of idiots! (Present company
excepted.)
> >
> I once had a motorcycle. I would have ridden it too but I could never
> get the motor to run for more than a few seconds.
>
> >Near misses?? Yup. I changed my mind at the altar!
> >
> Never mind. It could have been a hit.
>
> --
completely after being knocked off the BMW and getting a dislocated thumb
when a Kamikaze pedestrian ran out in front of me!
She got a broken leg. They do have their uses, those big, heavy "D" type
crash bars! :o(
Elisabeth Müller
<gregIGN...@charter.BLATHER.net> wrote:
>Elisabeth Müller wrote:
>
>>> Do I look like either a lawyer *or* a catcher?
>>> or a belly-scratcher?
>>
>> What a pity. I'd have liked that.
>
>I'm not into that whole scratching scene. Massage is more my style.
>
>Greg
>rub-a-dub-dub
There .... lower ... more to the left ... perfectly!
MosZibby
What part of a woman's body is the "dub"?
David Simpson
furiously:
My nemesis was a pedal cyclist. Made a right turn from the left side
of the road when about two metres in front of me. (Australia drives on
the left) Caught my car on the front LH corner and ended up with his
bald head smashing my windscreen. Then he had the cheek to allege
illegal practices on my part in his third party claim. I was furious
to say the least. I didn't hear the final outcome but I'll bet he got
compensation while I had to pay for the repair of my car.
David Simpson
furiously:
>>> Greg
>>> rub-a-dub-dub
>>
>> There .... lower ... more to the left ... perfectly!
>
>What part of a woman's body is the "dub"?
>
It was described perfectly.
nemo
times I've been cycled into on the pavement and had dozens of near misses!
It's illegal over here (Highways Act 1835, Section 74) but you try telling
them that - or try getting anyone to enforce it!
Why is it that as soon as an activity becomes really trendy, common sense
and safety go straight out of the window?!
They also think that for them, traffic lights are advisory!
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the guy:
>>
>I played some Bustan Abraham loud once when his kids were using his
>floor/my ceiling as a trampolie and he came down and bashed on my door
>- until a broom handle misteriously emerged from the letter box at very
>high speed and caught him right in the Solar Plexus! (^!^)
That's dis-turban 'im. He shoulda known to duck when your letter box
started playing "Pop goes the weasel."
>
>New clear fission's probably more to his taste - if he could get hold
>of the Pluto Neum - but Walt Disney wont give 'im any.
He might still try to get atom somehow, maybe recruit a brainy Catholic
at Disney. He'd only need a Minnieum to get to cortical Mass.
>He's got all the Integrated Circuits he needs for the firing circuitry
>though. Fission Chips!
Ah'm a geddon' those oiled fears of being deeply fried.
Milt
Greg Evans
>> I'm not into that whole scratching scene. Massage is more my style.
>> rub-a-dub-dub
>
> There .... lower ... more to the left ... perfectly!
I'm sorry, your time is up! We'll pick up here at the beginning of next
week's session. Pay the receptionist on your way out.
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
LOL! Good one!
Apart from the Chipmunk and the Head Friar, it's those Greek equestrians you
gotta look out for:
The Four Horsemen of the Acropolis!
David Simpson
furiously:
I agree. Especially those couriers. A quick extension of the arm
followed by an equally quick retraction of the same arm can cause them
to slow slightly if you time it right. You can even give them a thick
ear at the same time if you're lucky.
Ray
regards
Ray
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the guy:
>>
>> >though. Fission Chips!
>>
>> Ah'm a geddon' those oiled fears of being deeply fried.
>
>LOL! Good one!
I did good, master? I can't wait to entertain the town's pee-pull.
>Apart from the Chipmunk and the Head Friar, it's those Greek
>equestrians you gotta look out for:
>
>The Four Horsemen of the Acropolis!
My uncle went there to become an acrobatic Navy officer.
Milt
nemo
of you as you're crossing does the trick too. If they turn stroppy you can
turn the brolly round quickly and wallop them across the head with the
handle!
I've come up with quite a good slogan they seem to hate: "Two wheels - two
brain cells!" You're very welcome to use it.
nemo
Ray <R...@somewhere.com> wrote in message
news:40411730...@somewhere.com...
I mean: Wadayah doin' up there???
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
David Simpson
furiously:
>
>David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>news:m52140d6k67d5fap1...@4ax.com...
[snip]
>> I agree. Especially those couriers. A quick extension of the arm
>> followed by an equally quick retraction of the same arm can cause them
>> to slow slightly if you time it right. You can even give them a thick
>> ear at the same time if you're lucky.
>>
>A brolly at chest height just as they're going through a red light in front
>of you as you're crossing does the trick too. If they turn stroppy you can
>turn the brolly round quickly and wallop them across the head with the
>handle!
>
>I've come up with quite a good slogan they seem to hate: "Two wheels - two
>brain cells!" You're very welcome to use it.
>
LOL. Thanks, I brolly will.
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the guy:
>
Aaayup. Kids these days. No respect. Post any damn place they
like. See you later.
Ay Nemo, how you doin'? You know, back in my day you had to scroll 2
miles thru the snow to post.
Milt
nemo
> On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 10:36:39 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
> furiously:
>
> >
> >David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
> >news:m52140d6k67d5fap1...@4ax.com...
> [snip]
> >> I agree. Especially those couriers. A quick extension of the arm
> >> followed by an equally quick retraction of the same arm can cause them
> >> to slow slightly if you time it right. You can even give them a thick
> >> ear at the same time if you're lucky.
> >>
> >A brolly at chest height just as they're going through a red light in
front
> >of you as you're crossing does the trick too. If they turn stroppy you
can
> >turn the brolly round quickly and wallop them across the head with the
> >handle!
> >
> >I've come up with quite a good slogan they seem to hate: "Two wheels -
two
> >brain cells!" You're very welcome to use it.
> >
> LOL. Thanks, I brolly will.
>
ofanon.
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I
So then "nemo" says to the guy:
>> >
>> >Wadayah doin' up here??? OOPS . . . . .
>>
>> Aaayup. Kids these days. No respect. Post any damn place they
>> like. See you later.
<snip>
>> >Ray <R...@somewhere.com> wrote in message
>> >news:40411730...@somewhere.com...
>> >> Good stuff guys, keep it going. I'm enjoying it immensely
>> >> regards
>> >> Ray
<bulldoze>
>> >I mean: Wadayah doin' up there???
>>
>> Ay Nemo, how you doin'? You know, back in my day you had to scroll 2
>> miles thru the snow to post.
>>
>Providin you wrap up well, that's Dead E- Sea.
Don't got nothin' to say. Just thought Ray's profound observation was
worth quoting again.
Milt
David Simpson
furiously:
>
>David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>news:4i44401qptjar3nko...@4ax.com...
>> On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 10:36:39 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> typed
>> furiously:
>>
>> >
>> >David Simpson <faro...@picknowl.com.au> wrote in message
>> >news:m52140d6k67d5fap1...@4ax.com...
>> [snip]
>> >> I agree. Especially those couriers. A quick extension of the arm
>> >> followed by an equally quick retraction of the same arm can cause them
>> >> to slow slightly if you time it right. You can even give them a thick
>> >> ear at the same time if you're lucky.
>> >>
>> >A brolly at chest height just as they're going through a red light in
>front
>> >of you as you're crossing does the trick too. If they turn stroppy you
>can
>> >turn the brolly round quickly and wallop them across the head with the
>> >handle!
>> >
>> >I've come up with quite a good slogan they seem to hate: "Two wheels -
>two
>> >brain cells!" You're very welcome to use it.
>> >
>> LOL. Thanks, I brolly will.
>>
>And if you're ever on holiday in Israel, don't forget - you can only use it
>ofanon.
>
Are you a pal e stine?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Combat: Aggressive electronic bat.
Clive
<ne...@naughtylass2.wet> writes
>
>I've come up with quite a good slogan they seem to hate: "Two wheels -
>two brain cells!" You're very welcome to use it.
--
Clive
nemo
I did go to a concert of Palestinian music in Regents Park last year though.
Ironically and very sadly, it took place at a bandstand where the IRA blew
up a military band years ago and killed, I think, 14 musicians. I think they
were from the Paras.
Anyway, the Palestinian music was astonishingly good - so spiritual it was
almost transcendental. I've never heard anything like it. And apart from one
very minor remark they managed to keep politics out of it. (Make a pun of
that if yer like. They used every mode in the book.)
If only both stupid sides over there would stop killing each other and try
playing and singing together. The whole thing's bloody stupid and a sheer
waste of life and it makes me bloody sick.
nemo
Milton J. Smuthworthy, I <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in message
Had to scroll 2 miles thru the snow . . .? Well watch out for Good King
Wenceslass' lawyers. He might decide to sue.
nemo
Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:404454CE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
David Simpson
furiously:
An excellent idea.
MosZibby
Brickbat: Stick used by heavy hitters.
nemo
MosZibby <Naked@YourHouse> wrote in message
news:104btt9...@corp.supernews.com...
nemo
David Simpson
<sne...@sympatico.ca> typed furiously:
[absolutely nothing]
What's the matter? Did we leave you speechless?
MosZibby
> On Wed, 03 Mar 2004 14:17:46 -0500, Arno Martens
> <sne...@sympatico.ca> typed furiously:
>
> [absolutely nothing]
I always wondered what a brain fart looked like in type.
Tim Bruening
mike wheeEler wrote:
> In article <vnchp51...@corp.supernews.com>, jblv...@yahoo.com, Sy Knight
> was looking at the world oddly when:
> >
> >
> >Flatulent Dingo wrote ...
> >>
> >> Hello Nick,
> >>
> >> On Thu, 25 Sep 2003, at 13:57:43 [GMT-0700] (which was Fri, 6:57:43
> >> Australian Eastern Time) you wrote:
> >> > Aye, they are a brogish lot. One was seen aubergine.
> >>
> >> I am green with envy.
> >>
> >>
> >She was well, red.
> >
> That happened when she noticed she was showing pink.
Pinker: Light red dog.
Tim Bruening
mike wheeEler wrote:
> In article <20030927214019.1ea...@minesprig.com>,
> cyber_...@minesprig.com, Cybe R. Wizard was looking at the world oddly when:
> >
> >On Sun, 28 Sep 2003 02:36:57 GMT
> >"Cybe R. Wizard" <cyber_...@minesprig.com> wrote:
> >
> >> On Sat, 27 Sep 2003 19:26:51 -0700
> >> "Sy Knight" <jblv...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> >>
> >> >
> >> > Flatulent Dingo wrote ...
> >> > >
> >> > > Hello Nick,
> >> > >
> >> > > On Thu, 25 Sep 2003, at 13:57:43 [GMT-0700] (which was Fri,
> >> > > 6:57:43 Australian Eastern Time) you wrote:
> >> > > > Aye, they are a brogish lot. One was seen aubergine.
> >> > >
> >> > > I am green with envy.
> >> > >
> >> > >
> >> > She was well, red.
> >> >
> >> So what does she charge per pull?
> >>
> >> Cybe
> >
> >Whatever it is it will make you yell, "Oh!"
> >
> Now That is a pull it surprise!
Surprise: Knight of game shows.