November 9 Puns
Tim Bruening
dobey the elf wrote:
> Tim Bruening wrote:
> > Jon Delaney wrote:
> >
> > > "J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> > > news:0v2oe0dc5a4plealb...@4ax.com...
> > > > On Wed, 7 Jul 2004 10:59:01 +0930, "Sheila Dundee"
> > > > <Co...@optusnetXCAPS.com.au> found these unused words floating
> about:
> > > >
> > > > >"Jenni Saqua" <mar...@awol.com> wrote in message
> > > > >news:40eb1129$0$61938$d36...@news.calweb.com
> > > > >> "Sheila Dundee" wrote ...
> > > > >>> "J. A. Mc." wrote
> > > > >>>> On Tue, 06 Jul Pierre Abbat found these unused words
> floating
> > > > >>>> about:
> > > > >>>>
> > > > >>>>> Sheila Dundee wrote:
> > > > >>>>>
> > > > >>>>>> It's difficult to dance in high eeled shoes.
> > > > >>>>>
> > > > >>>>> Are you dancing the Virginia eel?
> > > > >>>>>
> > > > >>>> Just a little eel and toe tapping.
> > > > >>>
> > > > >>> And if I lose my glass slippery will come looking for me.
> > > > >>>
> > > > >> If 'e don't, wEel give 'im a good cloggin' we will!
> > > > >
> > > > > I see we are right in step, sister!
> > > > >
> > > > So you're both about Sabot age?
> > >
> > > And now a song from Elvers Presley............
> > > >
> >
> > Presley: Korean newspaper.
> Korean newspaper: reading between the Li Ings?
Thinly: Korean who has worked out.
Cheerfully: Happy Korean.
Angrily: Mad Korean.
nemo
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:4372B0D3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
Who says they're all called Lee?
Certainly not Mr. Jai Bong Kim or Mr. Bum Suk Hong.
(I kid you not!)
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Balker: Round dog.
Become: Bee sexual climax.
Booster: Spinning ghost.
Hiker: Dog greeting.
Liker: Fibbing dog.
Shocker: Electric dog.
Talker: Tall canine.
Walker: Wall of canines.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1672D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:44BCE2EE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > > David Simpson wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > On 10 Feb 2004 22:14:11 -0600, "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I"
> > > > > <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> typed furiously:
> > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > >So then, David Simpson turns to the guy and says:
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >>>>>New South Wales is good. Milt could suspend himself there.
> > > > > >>>Can I fly there on that virgin airline?
> > > > > >>No, it's already been raped. Quant, as in Mary, did the dirty.
> > > > > >>>>Noooooo! We'll let you keep him in the manner to which he
would
> like
> > > > > >>>>to become accustomed.
> > > > > >>>I could get accustomed to flying around with virgins. I might
> even
> > > get
> > > > > >>>my wollon gonged.
> > > > > >>>
> > > > > >>That would be a pain in the butt as they pricked it with the
pin.
> > > > > >
> > > > > >Well that's it for my Oz material. Would you mind moving to New
> Jersey?
> > > > > >
> > > > > Yes. I would mind.
> > > >
> > > > Minding: Brain bell.
> > >
> > > Vegetarian's hind-brain: Celerybellum.
> >
> > Veg-G: Plant eating goblin.
> >
> Or a goblin goblin a plant.
>
> His mum: "Oy! You'll goblind if you eat too quick!"
Red G: Communist goblin who hits homeruns.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:3F9767F3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:3F9196EE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Orkin: Children of mineral bearing rocks.
> > > >
> > > Baring straits - non-gay strippers.
> >
> > Bearing: A ring that turns you into a bear.
> >
> Ball-Bearing. A sphere that turns you testes into those of a bear.
>
> Ball Race: Vet chasing a tom cat!
Atom Bomb: Exploding male cat.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D043...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Nick Bell wrote:
> >
> > > "J. A. Mc." <jaSA...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> > news:49dntvk3g5mbi9ojj...@4ax.com...
> > > | On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 16:10:41 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > |
> > > | >
> > > | >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in ...
> > > | >| On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 14:29:53 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | >| <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > | >| >
> > > | >| >Holy Shi'ite. Always on the Sunni side.
> > > | >| >
> > > | >| Nice ... got any more mon?
> > > | >
> > > | >Another one rung up for Ladder Day.
> > > | >
> > > | Perhaps Tuna ... somthing to feed the cat o' lick yourself?
> > > |
> > >
> > > There's Salmon fur The Seventh Day Adventist
> >
> > Salmon Rusdie?
> >
> > Satanic Verses: Devilish poetry or songs.
>
> Damed difficult book to understand actually. I had to pay over the odds
for
> my copy and when I took it into work to read I had to put it in a plain
> cover!
To hide it from your co-workers?
Plain cover: Hides a large flat area.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:443CE104...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:443B67D8...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > news:44387023...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Don Kirkman wrote:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > > Law enforcement agencies in Southern California, in
compliance
> with
> > > > > > > State law, have gathered together all the guns they
confiscated
> > > during
> > > > > > > the past year because they had been used in crimes. Today,
a
> local
> > > > > > > smelter is reducing 6,000 contraband guns to steel
reinforcing
> bar
> > > > > > > stock; each year the steel produced is fed into a suitable
> > > construction
> > > > > > > project, and this year's output will eventually end up in
the
> San
> > > > > > > Francisco Bay Area's Bay Bridge. On being told of this by a
> > > > > > > representative of the press, Dubya is reported to have said
> "Haven't
> > > I
> > > > > > > been tellin' you boys all along that we knew we were gonna
find
> mass
> > > > > > > destruction of weapons?".
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Contraband: Musical rebels in Nicaragua.
> > > > >
> > > > > Terrorists not rebels.
> > > >
> > > > One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter.
> > > >
> > >
> > > But when the cover-ups and propaganda stop, terrorists and freedom
> fighters
> > > supported by the US always turn out to be EVERYONE'S terrorists of
the
> worst
> > > kind.
> >
> > Even worse than the 9-11 terrorists??????
> >
> > I don't recall the Contras ever flying planes into buildings!
> >
>
> Never-ending fork again! How many more tines?
>
> A diabolical act by one group doesn't excuse the actions of another.
Elephantine: Part of a very big comb or fork.
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D0A3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:42E8D3FE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > Timmy <tsbr...@dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > news:1105329209.8...@c13g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
> > > > >
> > > > > Duping: Do ring the bell.
> > > > >
> > > > > Muting: Cow bell, cat bell, silent bell, or subatomic bell.
> > > > > Parent: To rent two things.
> > > > >
> > > > Mutate: Changing UK art gallery.
> > >
> > > Mutate: Cow or cat art gallery?
> >
> > Tate Modern! A powerhouse of Art!
> >
> > http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tate_Modern
> >
> > Mutator: Potato geneticist
>
> Geneticyst: Nasty growth caused by eating too much GM food!
Food from General Motors?
General Motors: Commander of the car army.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C15D9E...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > dfoofnik wrote:
> >
> > > Greedy investors : a hedgehog fund
> > > un-Bear : a Bull
> > > Innocence : Rounding off to whole dollars
> > > Embezzlement : taking stock
> > >
> > > Wachovia has changed its name
> > > from Watch-ova-ya
> > > to Whack-ova-ya.
> > >
> > > Bradstreet : you'll be broker when we're Dun
> >
> > Greedy: Demons who love money.
>
> Demiser: Stingy demon who repeatedly dies.
Stingy: Miserly goblin.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D63A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > SUB: Sports Utility Broom, flown by wealthy witches. I saw this pun
in
> > a Mother Goose and Grimm 2 years ago.
> >
> > SUV: Sports Utility Vampire.
> >
> > Pumpkin: Relative of a pump.
> >
> > Halloweenie: Hallowed out hot dog.
> >
> > Booting: Ghost bell or ringing ghost.
>
> Boot Cramp: Caused by milly-tory recruits wearing badly-fitting footwear
Milly Tory: British Conservatives in grain processing facilities?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44336234...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Nick Bell wrote:
> >
> > > Renee writeth this ...
> > >
> > > I love cats. I prefer them to people.
> > > They don't clog the Interstate
> > > and they seldom vote Republican
> > > _________________________________
> > >
> > > I am definitely against giving cats the vote or letting them have
> > driver's licenses.
> > > Especially undocumented ones. And these days an election can be won
by
> > a whisker.
> >
> > Diebold: Very brave election workers.
> >
>
> Bloke unconscience on the ground.
>
> A cop asks what happened. A guy replies, "He's bold."
>
> "Waddayamean?" says the cop.
>
> "Somebody hit 'im on the head with a big heavy basin!" replied the man.
Basin: A water inlet that transgress against God.
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:443CE104...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:443B67D8...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D0A3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D043...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Nick Bell wrote:
> >
> > > "J. A. Mc." <jaSA...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> > news:49dntvk3g5mbi9ojj...@4ax.com...
> > > | On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 16:10:41 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > |
> > > | >
> > > | >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in ...
> > > | >| On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 14:29:53 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | >| <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > | >| >
Tim Bruening
nemo
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:443CE104...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:443B67D8...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D0A3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:44C1D043...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Nick Bell wrote:
> >
> > > "J. A. Mc." <jaSA...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
> > news:49dntvk3g5mbi9ojj...@4ax.com...
> > > | On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 16:10:41 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > |
> > > | >
> > > | >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in ...
> > > | >| On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 14:29:53 -0800, "Nick Bell"
> > > | >| <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating
> > about:
> > > | >| >
