oh sh**!
marc g boffardi
A friend of mine sent this to me sometime last year.
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The Sh|t List
GHOST SH!T: That's the kind where you feel the sh|t come out, have sh|t on
the toilet paper, but there is no sh|t in the toilet.
MEXICAN FOOD SH!T: A class all of its own.
CLEAN SH!T: The kind where you shit it, see it in the toilet, but there is
nothing on the toilet paper.
WET SH!T: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped
so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your un-
derware so you don't ruin them with a brown stain.
SECOND WAVE SH!T: It happens, when you are done sh|tting, you've pulled up
your pants to your knees, and you realize that you have to
sh|t somemore.
BRAIN HEMMORAGE THROUGH YOUR NOSE SH!T or the POP A VEIN IN YOUR FOREHEAD
SH!T: The kind where you strain so much to get it out that you practically
have a stroke.
RICHARD SIMMONS SH!T: The kind where you sh|t so much you lose 30 pounds.
CORN SH!T: Self-explanatory.
LINCOLN-LOG SH!T: The kind of sh|t that is so huge that you're afraid to flush
the toilet without breaking it into a few pieces with your
toilet brush.
DRINKER'S SH!T: That is the kind of sh|t that you have in the morning after a
long night of drinking. It's most noticeablr trait is the
tread marks left on the bottom of the toilet.
"GEE, I WISH I COULD SH!T" SH!T: It's the kind where you want to sh|t, but all
you do is sit on the toilet cramped, and fart
a few times.
SPINAL TAP SH!T: That's the kind where it hurts so much coming out that you
swear it was leaving you sideways.
WET CHEEKS SH!T or the POWER DUMP SH!T: That's the kind that comes out your
a$$ so fast that your butt cheeks get
splashed with the toilet water.
LIQUID SH!T or the "SCREAMER" SH!T: That's the kind where yellowish-brown
liquid shoots out your butt, splatters all
over the inside of your toilet bowl, the
whole time ironically burning your tender
anus.
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Now how about some sh!tting synonyms? I'll start:
lose some weight
power dump
chase a brown trout down the river
squeeze the cheese
pinch a loaf
grind some beef
lay some cable
nuke it
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Marc Boffardi
V081...@UBVMS.CC.BUFFALO.EDU
V081...@UBVMS.BITNET
BOFF...@ACSU.BUFFALO.EDU
Legalize free enterprise murder! Why let the governments have all the fun?!!
Alan Drew
>*******************************************************************************
>
>Now how about some sh!tting synonyms? I'll start:
>
>lose some weight
>power dump
>chase a brown trout down the river
>squeeze the cheese
>pinch a loaf
>grind some beef
>lay some cable
>nuke it
core dump
--
..!mcsun!slxsys!cdh || c...@specialix.co.uk
Disclaimer:- I didn't write this: It does not represent my own opinions,
those of my employer, anyone I know or anyone that knows me!
#include <[.signature of your choice]>
R. Scott V. Paterson
>>
> make another Texan (Colorado humor....)
I heard this in college frequently:
"Pinch a loaf"