Parody Commercials (Adult Content)
Bry
Greg Evans
> I put up all of my parodies up in one spot
You know what they say about putting up all your eggs up in one
basket....
ynotssor
Bry <big...@sasknospamtel.net> wrote:
> I put up all of my parodies up in one spot
You misspelled panties.
Bry
peachy ashie passion
I like though, how you put the (Adult Content) there to try to lure
us in with the offer of cheap thrills. Nice job knowing your target
audience.
Bill Colmers
"peachy ashie passion"
> I like though, how you put the (Adult Content) there to try to lure us
> in with the offer of cheap thrills. Nice job knowing your target
> audience.
Like any of us are remotely adult in attitude!
Bill
"I won't grow up, I'll never go to school...."
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
That is so true. The only problem about putting that advice into
practice is that I end up pushing 12 shopping carts at the supermarket
every time I buy eggs.
Larry Krzewinski
<exquisi...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>>>> I put up all of my parodies up in one spot
>>>
>>> You misspelled panties.
>>
>> I think you might be in the wrong news group...LOL
>
> I like though, how you put the (Adult Content) there to try to lure
>us in with the offer of cheap thrills. Nice job knowing your target
>audience.
Then I am so your man. I can be both cheap and thrilling!
MosNot
"peachy ashie passion" <exquisi...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:XUBHi.2753$io2.781@trnddc06...
Then he shouldn't have posted here.
We're very child-like.
peachy ashie passion
That is sort of my point. Adults wouldn't be so titillated by that.
MosNot
>>>>ynotssor wrote:
>>>>>Bry <big...@sasknospamtel.net> wrote:
>>>>>>I put up all of my parodies up in one spot
>>>>>You misspelled panties.
>>>>I think you might be in the wrong news group...LOL
>>> I like though, how you put the (Adult Content) there to try to lure us
>>> in with the offer of cheap thrills. Nice job knowing your target
>>> audience.
>> Then he shouldn't have posted here.
>> We're very child-like.
>>
> That is sort of my point. Adults wouldn't be so titillated by that.
Titillated ? That when you enter a room backwards.....?
Greg Evans
> ... I end up pushing 12 shopping carts at
> the supermarket every time I buy eggs.
That has "Performance Art" written all over it. I'm going steal that idea,
set up an installation in some trendy NYC art gallery, and make a mint!
Larry Krzewinski
Go ahead. I must warn you, though, I buy mints by the bag, Greg.
MosNot
"Larry Krzewinski" <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote in message
news:674ve39t1lf6b6584...@4ax.com...
Yeah, Greg, watch out for his breath !
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
>>>> ... I end up pushing 12 shopping carts at
>>>> the supermarket every time I buy eggs.
>>>
>>>That has "Performance Art" written all over it. I'm going steal that
>>>idea,
>>>set up an installation in some trendy NYC art gallery, and make a mint!
>>
>> Go ahead. I must warn you, though, I buy mints by the bag, Greg.
>
>Yeah, Greg, watch out for his breath !
Do you really think that I'd want Greg's eggs?
MosNot
You sure you want that question answered ?
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
>>>>>> ... I end up pushing 12 shopping carts at
>>>>>> the supermarket every time I buy eggs.
>>>>>
>>>>>That has "Performance Art" written all over it. I'm going steal that
>>>>>idea,
>>>>>set up an installation in some trendy NYC art gallery, and make a mint!
>>>>
>>>> Go ahead. I must warn you, though, I buy mints by the bag, Greg.
>>>
>>>Yeah, Greg, watch out for his breath !
>>
>> Do you really think that I'd want Greg's eggs?
>
>You sure you want that question answered ?
You may want to ask Greg if he wants it answered. He's liable to
break all his eggs first.
MosNot
And yet, I really may not want.
>He's liable to break all his eggs first.
Huevoes de Grego don't interest me.
SummersFrenzy
>
> Huevoes de Grego don't interest me.
Whatsamatta you? It sounds a right interesting recipe . . . too bad all food
is involuntarily off limits right now
Greg Evans
> . . . too bad all food is involuntarily off limits right now
What are you talking about? I'm eating breakfast as we speak.
...Would you like me to describe it to you in stirring detail?
SummersFrenzy
Like I could stop you if you were really interested in sharing . . .
half-baked though it would be
Bill Colmers
"SummersFrenzy"
. . too bad all food
> is involuntarily off limits right now
Morning sickness is *such* a pain!
Bill
Greg Evans
Heck, I'm not even a quarter baked. It's too early in the day for
that!
Greg
officially, we have to wait until 4:20
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
>>>>>Yeah, Greg, watch out for his breath !
>>>> Do you really think that I'd want Greg's eggs?
>>>You sure you want that question answered ?
>>
>> You may want to ask Greg if he wants it answered.
>
>And yet, I really may not want.
>
>>He's liable to break all his eggs first.
>
>Huevoes de Grego don't interest me.
Now you're the one busting Greg's huevos and I'm sure that he'd rather
have Summer or Peachy bust them.
Greg Evans
> Now you're the one busting Greg's huevos and I'm sure that
> he'd rather have Summer or Peachy bust them.
I vote for "not busting", kthx. Else I'll take my huevos and go home!
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
Froot Loops with beer? It's surprisingly good ...
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
> Heck, I'm not even a quarter baked. It's too early in the day for
> that! - officially, we have to wait until 4:20
ayem or peeyem?
Greg Evans
>> Heck, I'm not even a quarter baked. It's too early in the day
>> for that! - officially, we have to wait until 4:20
>
> ayem or peeyem?
Greg Evans
> Froot Loops with beer? It's surprisingly good ...
I would indeed be immensely surprised.
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
Not even with their real busts? I thought you'd have jumped at that
opportunity.
ynotssor
Larry Krzewinski <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote:
>>> Now you're the one busting Greg's huevos and I'm sure that
>>> he'd rather have Summer or Peachy bust them.
>>
>> I vote for "not busting", kthx. Else I'll take my huevos and go
>> home!
>
> Not even with their real busts? I thought you'd have jumped at that
> opportunity.
He probably doesn't have the huevos for skydiving.
Greg Evans
> He probably doesn't have the huevos for skydiving.
http://en.allexperts.com/q/Physics-1358/egg-drop-experiment-3.htm
SummersFrenzy
> SummersFrenzy wrote:
>
>>>> . . . too bad all food is involuntarily off limits right now
>>> What are you talking about? I'm eating breakfast as we speak.
>>> ...Would you like me to describe it to you in stirring detail?
>>
>> Like I could stop you if you were really interested in sharing . . .
>> half-baked though it would be
>
> Heck, I'm not even a quarter baked. It's too early in the day for that!
Ooooooh . . . just a few minutes away . . . be sure to set the timer so
you're not over-cooked
SummersFrenzy
Wow - does that mean you have news for us, Bill? Congratulations!!
Greg Evans
>> Heck, I'm not even a quarter baked. It's too early in the day for
>> that! officially, we have to wait until 4:20
>
> Ooooooh . . . just a few minutes away . . . be sure to set the timer
> so you're not over-cooked
D'oh!! Too late! Somebody grab the fire extinguisher!
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
>> He probably doesn't have the huevos for skydiving.
>
> http://en.allexperts.com/q/Physics-1358/egg-drop-experiment-3.htm
I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to lead
the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
Larry justs throws himself into the pool when it happens to him.
Greg Evans
>>> . . . be sure to set the timer so you're not over-cooked
>> D'oh!! Too late! Somebody grab the fire extinguisher!
>
> Larry justs throws himself into the pool when it happens to him.
Eureka!!
Greg Evans
>> http://en.allexperts.com/q/Physics-1358/egg-drop-experiment-3.htm
>
> I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to
> lead the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
If you waited for a really hot day to throw them on the sidewalk, you
could have scrambled eggs afterward.
ynotssor
SummersFrenzy <icediamo...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>>> . . too bad all food is involuntarily off limits right now
>>
>> Morning sickness is *such* a pain!
>
> Wow - does that mean you have news for us, Bill? Congratulations!!
Test-tube babies cost so much because they have a womb with a view.
Bill Colmers
"SummersFrenzy"
> Wow - does that mean you have news for us, Bill? Congratulations!!
Yes, yes I do. Summer has nausea, which *might* mean morning sickness.
Prof. Dr. Bill
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
Calm down. He wasn't talking about the cess pool, Greg.
Larry Krzewinski
<sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>> Wow - does that mean you have news for us, Bill? Congratulations!!
>
>Yes, yes I do. Summer has nausea, which *might* mean morning sickness.
I wonder who is the father? Fess up, Greg.
Greg Evans
>> Summer has nausea, which *might* mean morning
>> sickness.
>
> I wonder who is the father? Fess up, Greg.
Okay, I admit it: I too am curious.
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
>>> He probably doesn't have the huevos for skydiving.
>>
>> http://en.allexperts.com/q/Physics-1358/egg-drop-experiment-3.htm
>
>I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to lead
>the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
Why were there French police in Italy? Did the Italian polizia know?
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
Not you, eh? It can't be Mos since he'd be bragging about it. That
leaves Bill or Tony. Bill did know about her morning sickness. Tony
would probably jump out of a plane without a parachute if it was him.
I'm guessing that Bill must be the proud papa-to-be.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
I believe he occasionally lives in Yreka.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
>> I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to
>> lead the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
>
> If you waited for a really hot day to throw them on the sidewalk, you
> could have scrambled eggs afterward.
Ever seen geese fly in a V formation, and noticed that one side of the V is
longer than the other? Do you know why that is? It's because one side of the
V has more geese in it than the other.
Bill Colmers
"Larry Krzewinski"
> Not you, eh? It can't be Mos since he'd be bragging about it. That
> leaves Bill or Tony. Bill did know about her morning sickness. Tony
> would probably jump out of a plane without a parachute if it was him.
> I'm guessing that Bill must be the proud papa-to-be.
Brilliant, Watson, but flawed. For this to ahve taken place, there must be
both motive and opportunity. While the motive cannot be denied, the
opportunity has never arisen, dammit!
Bill
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>> Wow - does that mean you have news for us, Bill? Congratulations!!
>
> Yes, yes I do. Summer has nausea, which *might* mean morning sickness.
Hmmmm ... I thought her statement of "... too bad all food is involuntarily
off limits right now" meant that she had to lose 400 lbs. to get out the
doorframe to the grocery store.
ynotssor
Larry Krzewinski <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote:
>> I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to
>> lead the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
>
> Why were there French police in Italy?
I'd been leading them around on such a chase since I threw some raw eggs
from the Eiffel Tower -- they thought they had me cornered in Pizza, but
that parachute came in handy again.
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
> Brilliant, Watson, but flawed. For this to ahve taken place, there
> must be both motive and opportunity. While the motive cannot be
> denied, the opportunity has never arisen, dammit!
There are now a few different pills available to help.
SummersFrenzy
*If* you're referring to a symptom of pregnancy . . . <shudder/cringe>
Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . . and best left
to the professionals
SummersFrenzy
Now, see? That would be why those silly girls stand in line for DAYS waiting
for Bill's office hours.
StudiousSummer
(seriously considering return to academia)
MosNot
"Larry Krzewinski" <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote in message
news:ktp2f3tcf5gu4qlmq...@4ax.com...
> On Wed, 19 Sep 2007 08:21:33 -0600, "MosNot" <StillNot@YourHouse>
> wrote:
>
>>>>>>Yeah, Greg, watch out for his breath !
>>>>> Do you really think that I'd want Greg's eggs?
>>>>You sure you want that question answered ?
>>> You may want to ask Greg if he wants it answered.
>>And yet, I really may not want.
>>>He's liable to break all his eggs first.
>>Huevoes de Grego don't interest me.
>
> Now you're the one busting Greg's huevos and I'm sure that he'd rather
> have Summer or Peachy bust them.
What part of "don't interest me" didn't you understand.
I was talking about your need for mints because of
your breath, and you started mentioning Greg's eggs....
ynotssor
SummersFrenzy <icediamo...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . . and
> best left to the professionals
The "professionals" have neither education nor any training in the matter.
ynotssor
SummersFrenzy <icediamo...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> (seriously considering return to academia)
Some of us have never left it; we just don't pay the big bucks to attend the
institutions anymore.
SummersFrenzy
> SummersFrenzy wrote:
>
>> (seriously considering return to academia)
>
> Some of us have never left it; we just don't pay the big bucks to attend
> the
> institutions anymore.
There is *that* small difference between life-long-education, and academia
<shrugs>
SummersFrenzy
> SummersFrenzy wrote:
>
>> Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . . and
>> best left to the professionals
>
> The "professionals" have neither education nor any training in the matter.
Another reason to avoid the process as much as possible
Larry Krzewinski
One word: Viagra. I'm told that it'll raise the dead.
Larry Krzewinski
I happen to have one teaching position left at Larry's American
College of Kama Sutra. Would you be interested?
Larry Krzewinski
wrote:
>>> I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed to
>>> lead the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
>>
>> Why were there French police in Italy?
>
>I'd been leading them around on such a chase since I threw some raw eggs
>from the Eiffel Tower -- they thought they had me cornered in Pizza, but
>that parachute came in handy again.
You attached parachutes to the raw eggs? Why?
ynotssor
SummersFrenzy <icediamo...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>>> Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . . and
>>> best left to the professionals
>>
>> The "professionals" have neither education nor any training in the
>> matter.
>
> Another reason to avoid the process as much as possible
One wishes to avoid the result, not the process.
ynotssor
Larry Krzewinski <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote:
>> While the motive cannot be denied, the opportunity
>> has never arisen, dammit!
>
> One word: Viagra. I'm told that it'll raise the dead.
A fellow I know told me that he got in a hurry one day and took the blue
pill without any water. It got stuck in his throat and he had a stiff neck
for three days.
ynotssor
Larry Krzewinski <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote:
>> StudiousSummer
>> (seriously considering return to academia)
>
> I happen to have one teaching position left at Larry's American
> College of Kama Sutra. Would you be interested?
You misspelled Karma Suture.
ynotssor
Larry Krzewinski <Feerles...@madmagazine.com> wrote:
>>>> I also threw raw eggs off the Leaning Tower of Pizza, and managed
>>>> to lead the gendarmes on a wild goose chase.
>>>
>>> Why were there French police in Italy?
>>
>> I'd been leading them around on such a chase since I threw some raw
>> eggs from the Eiffel Tower -- they thought they had me cornered in
>> Pizza, but that parachute came in handy again.
>
> You attached parachutes to the raw eggs? Why?
Do your own homework and read the article.
SummersFrenzy
> SummersFrenzy wrote:
>
>>(seriously considering return to academia)
>
> I happen to have one teaching position left at Larry's American
> College of Kama Sutra. Would you be interested?
*one* position? Boy, are you out of the loop
Greg Evans
> Ever seen geese fly in a V formation, and noticed that one
> side of the V is longer than the other? Do you know why that
> is? It's because one side of the V has more geese in it than
> the other.
Truly, sir, you are a Ninja of the obvious.
Greg Evans
> ... they thought they had me cornered in Pizza
That would have been a messy situation.
Greg Evans
> Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . .
> and best left to the professionals
"...you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a
license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a
father." -- "Parenthood", 1989
Greg Evans
> A fellow I know told me that he got in a hurry one day and
> took the blue pill without any water. It got stuck in his
> throat and he had a stiff neck for three days.
I understand some Viagra accidentally got into a city's water supply; for a
week nobody could roll up their garden hoses.
Greg Evans
> You misspelled Karma Suture.
Suture self.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <gregeva...@charterBLATHER.net> wrote:
>> ... they thought they had me cornered in Pizza
>
> That would have been a messy situation.
It's all documented as painfully spicy, even though it's the second most
amazing story ever told:
http://www.campchaos.com/videos/campchaos-nippleman-tsmaset.mov
Bill Colmers
"SummersFrenzy"
> Reproduction is one of the only things that frightens me . . . and best
> left to the professionals
A friend of mine once remarked that indeed reproduction was to be taken
seriously, and that the practice was essential. Indeed, he recommended
practicing until you got it right first.
Bill
I suppose that is what is meant by a "professional" in this context?
Bill Colmers
"Larry Krzewinski"
> One word: Viagra. I'm told that it'll raise the dead.
Ok, Ok, let me rephrase that. Summer and I have never met in realspace.
Bill
Sheesh. "Viagra" he says! Just *who* is the pharmacologist here?!!
Bill Colmers
"ynotssor" <
> Some of us have never left it; we just don't pay the big bucks to attend
> the
> institutions anymore.
Me, I never left school, the positions have just changed, that's all!
Prof. Dr. Bill
And, of course, *they* pay *me*!
Greg Evans
> Me, I never left school, the positions have just changed, that's
> all!
Now it's *you* on top?
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
I see you have all the evangelical zeal of the missionary.
Bill Colmers
"Greg Evans"
>> Me, I never left school, the positions have just changed, that's all!
>
> Now it's *you* on top?
Let's say that I now have considerably more freedoms as to how.
Bill
chafing considerably under the idiocies of bureaucrats at the moment, but
still more free!
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
> chafing considerably under the idiocies of bureaucrats at the moment,
"at the moment"? Now _that's_ funny!
Bill Colmers
"ynotssor" <
>> chafing considerably under the idiocies of bureaucrats at the moment,
>
> "at the moment"? Now _that's_ funny!
Tony, "chafe" implies contact with them, something I assiduously avoid
unless absolutely necessary.
Bill
who needs grant applications signed by them at the moment
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>>> chafing considerably under the idiocies of bureaucrats at the
>>> moment,
>>
>> "at the moment"? Now _that's_ funny!
>
> Tony, "chafe" implies contact with them, something I assiduously avoid
> unless absolutely necessary.
It was your choice to work in such a bureaucratic environment in the first
place.
Bill Colmers
"ynotssor"
> It was your choice to work in such a bureaucratic environment in the first
> place.
"Why work if you can get paid?"
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
Get paid for self-aggrandizing whining ...
Bill Colmers
"ynotssor"
> Get paid for self-aggrandizing whining ...
Is *that* what you do? Nice niche!
Bill
Greg Evans
>>> Me, I never left school, the positions have just changed,
>>> that's all!
>> Now it's *you* on top?
>
> I see you have all the evangelical zeal of the missionary.
On the contrary, I find it pays to be flexible.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <fa...@bogus.com> wrote:
"We'll bend over backwards to give you the best deal!"
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>> Get paid for self-aggrandizing whining ...
>
> Is *that* what you do? Nice niche!
I don't get paid, I just earn it.
Bill Colmers
"ynotssor"
> I don't get paid, I just earn it.
Working for charity, eh?
ynotssor
Bill Colmers <sambo...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>> I don't get paid, I just earn it.
>
> Working for charity, eh?
Money isn't important unless you don't have any. Constantly tooting your own
academic qualifications in a humor newsgroup is only done by those who are
insecure and have to prove themselves to people who really don't give a
shit.
Greg Evans
> Constantly tooting your own academic qualifications in a
> humor newsgroup is only done by those who are insecure
> and have to prove themselves to people who really don't
> give a shit.
Constantly sneering at everyone else in a humor newsgroup is only done by
those who are insecure and have to prove they're "above all that" to people
who are only going to make fun of you anyway!
Greg
present company included, of course
ynotssor
Greg Evans <gregeva...@charterBLATHER.net> wrote:
> Constantly sneering at everyone else in a humor newsgroup is only
> done by those who are insecure and have to prove they're "above all
> that" to people who are only going to make fun of you anyway!
Toot your own horn on that one.
Greg Evans
> Toot your own horn
If I could do that, I'd never leave the house.
ynotssor
Greg Evans <gregeva...@charterBLATHER.net> wrote:
>> Toot your own horn
>
> If I could do that, I'd never leave the house.
Nor could one claim "We'll bend over backwards ..." unless they're really,
*really* flexible.
Greg Evans
>>> Toot your own horn
>> If I could do that, I'd never leave the house.
>
> Nor could one claim "We'll bend over backwards ..." unless
> they're really, *really* flexible.
I'm pretty certain that I for one have never claimed I'd bend over
backwards...and anyway, that'd be the wrong direction....
ynotssor
Greg Evans <gregeva...@charterBLATHER.net> wrote:
I wish I could find a URL to a photo-postcard that I saw in April 1997 that
showed a contortionist at a street fair in France (where else?) bent
completely around backwards with his head forward of his knees and between
them blowing a bugle.
SummersFrenzy
>
>>> I don't get paid, I just earn it.
>>
>> Working for charity, eh?
>
> Money isn't important unless you don't have any. Constantly tooting
> your own academic qualifications in a humor newsgroup is only done
> by those who are insecure and have to prove themselves to people
> who really don't give a shit.
Soooooo . . . constantly tooting about life activities to prove you have a
life . . . that's ok?
SummersFrenzy
> Greg Evans wrote:
>
>> On the contrary, I find it pays to be flexible.
>
> "We'll bend over backwards to give you the best deal!"
Sounds like advertising for one of the local car dealerships
SummersFrenzy
>
> Constantly sneering at everyone else in a humor newsgroup is only
> done by those who are insecure and have to prove they're
> "above all that" to people who are only going to make fun of you
> anyway!
Nicely said . . . although, what are you trying to say about the rest of us?
I mean, who around here doesn't do the sneer thing?