Writers' strike threatening porn industry
Brad Templeton
a less public havoc on the pornography industry. Porn writers, concerned
about declining revenue from broadcast TV, also seek a greater share of
revenue from the future growth areas of DVD and online sales.
"Online sales and DVD may one day be the prime sources of revenue in our
industry," stated union spokesman Seymour Beaver. We want to be sure
we get our fair share of that for providing the writing that makes this
industry tick.
"It's getting terrible," reported one porn consumer who refused to give
his name. "I just saw Horny Nurses 14 and I have to tell you it was just
a reshash of the plots from Horny Nurses 9 and 11. It's like they didn't
even have a writer."
"Fans are not going to put up with movies lacking in plot, character
and dialogue, and that's what they'll get if they don't meet our terms,"
said Beaver. Beaver, who claims to have a copyright on the line, "Oh yes,
baby, do it just like that, oh yeah" says he will not allow use of his
lines without proper payment of residuals.
Some writers also fear that the move to online will result in customers simply
downloading individual scenes rather than seeking movies with a cohesive
story thread that makes you care about the characters. "I saw one movie
with 5 scenes, and no character was in 2 of them," complained one writer.
"What do people want? Movies where the actors just walk into a room,
strip and just go at it? Where they always start with oral sex, then
doggy, and then a money shot? Fans will walk if that's all they get,"
according to PWGA member Dick Member. "And don't think about doing the
lonely housewife and the pool-boy again. I own that."
An industry spokesman said they had not yet seen any decline in revenues
due to the strike, as they have about 2 million already-written scripts
on the shelves. In addition, Hot Online Corporation spokesman Ivana Doit
claimed their company is experimenting with a computer program that creates
scripts through a secret algorithm. Scripts penned by the computer have
already brought in a million in sales, claims Doit, but she would not
indicate which films this applied to.
Comment at: http://ideas.4brad.com/writers-strike-threatening-porn-industry
--
Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke (jokes ONLY) to fu...@netfunny.com.
If you "followup" a joke here, the posting goes to rec.humor.d. If you wish
to make another joke based on one you see here, mail it to fu...@netfunny.com.
If it's urgent, use top...@netfunny.com. For commentary on jokes, simply
participate in rec.humor.d
This joke's link: http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/07/Nov/strike.html