Doe Tilts with the Boys
oil doe
piece I did for PokerSchoolOnline (PSO). The only other piece I posted on
RGP was a depressing essay about self-destruction inspired by Scotty N's
WSOP stud play called "Poker Suicide"...I think this is a little lighter.
Doe Tilts with the Boys
All of us harbor a poker top 10 wish list. Whether its wearing a bracelet
home from the big one, bouncing Helmuth out on a bad beat, or just
swapping hats with Chris Ferguson for the day – we all have our poker
fantasies. Well today one of mine came true.
Watching the final table of the 2003 WSOP $2000 Omaha 8, I notice a small,
fidgeting figure talking incessantly across from me on the viewing
bleachers. Could this be Perry “The Baiter” Friedman – 2002 WSOP $1500
Omaha 8 bracelet winner – former PSOer – and most importantly TILTBOY??
Those of you that revel in degenerate and irreverent poker humor most
likely already know about the tiltboys. If you somehow missed the boat on
the whole tiltboy phenomenon – check out their website at
http://www.tiltboys.com. (I am partial to story about the tiltboys
playing a California ladies tourney in drag.)
Well it is indeed Perry – accompanied by tiltboy compadre Lennie (with an
i-e) Augustine. It’s a tiltboy double header and I am in my glory.
There is really no need to interview Perry, or any tiltboy for that
matter, as the spewage is constant. If I took notes in shorthand on speed
it would be hard to keep up with the banter. We talked about many things
– and of course there was the plethora of obligatory over/under bets – but
here is a brief summary of my encounter.
The Nick Name:
Perry adopted the nickname “The Baiter” as a spoof on Men’s nickname, “The
Master.” Get it? “Master” - “Baiter.”
If They Gave a Bracelet For Sweating…
Perry takes sweating very seriously. He may in fact be the top money
sweater of all time – sweating people to well over $2 million in money
finishes. Chris Ferguson can attest to this, since he has not won a
bracelet without the benefit of Perry sweat. In fact, Perry was busy
sweating Chris to his fourth bracelet as we spoke.
It’s a huge responsibility, but the sweater plays an important and often
unrecognized role in the world of big money poker. Lennie points out that
“The player at the table as too much going on – playing cards and such.
It is up to the sweater to subliminally communicate to the player that a
powerful winning force surrounds them.” And it is often gut wrenching
work. Perry recalls one tournament where he had to sweat Chris on three
separate occasions where he was all-in with a smaller ace against T.J
Cloutier. Sweating is obviously not for the feint of heart.
Brilliant Commentary:
Perry also provides brilliant poker commentary – possibly a future career
path for him. Ferguson was in a hand where the board was 5342Q. Perry’s
unbelievable insight – “Chris either has the wheel or he doesn’t.” It
doesn’t get much better than that!!
On Helmuth:
While many claim to have bluffed Helmuth off a better hand – Perry is the
only player I know who accidentally accomplished this feat. While
intending to only call Helmuth, and in fact verbalizing a call, Perry
accidentally spilled too many chips in the pot. Helmuth folded. Lesson:
Phil may be able to read players – but apparently cannot read lips.
Perry overheard Phil in the restroom saying, “So there I was, next in line
at the urinal…” Perry’s quick retort, “Phil are you telling urinal bad
beat stories now?”
On Porn and Poker:
Perry acknowledges that porn and poker are a logical and winning
combination. Although he confesses that it is often a challenge to keep
up porn and chat while playing online – being that chat sometimes
requiring two hands on the keyboard. Borrowing from the boxing paradigm,
he suggests that live tourneys start using scantily clad women to march
around with placards announcing limit increases, i.e. Limit Girls.
On Poker and PSO:
While no longer a PSO member, Perry has fond memories of PSO. Perry
specifically credits PSO for developing his HE game – a game that has been
his big money winner this year. When I asked if he had trouble switching
gears between Omaha and HE his response was, “No. It’s all the same game.
The game is tournament.”
The high point of my encounter was when a few of my one-liners actually
got a verbal drum fill from the boys. My low point – and sad to say - I
never did get in a game of Roshambo (Rock-Paper-Scissors') with the boys
before I had to leave. Hopefully there will be another time.
Never had so much fun tilting,
doe
_________________________________________________________________
Posted using RecPoker.com - http://www.recpoker.com
Peter Lizak
> The high point of my encounter was when a few of my one-liners actually
> got a verbal drum fill from the boys. My low point – and sad to say - I
> never did get in a game of Roshambo (Rock-Paper-Scissors') with the boys
> before I had to leave. Hopefully there will be another time.
Maybe they feared your Roshambo skill?? I
It's Rock-Paper-Stone where I come from.
> Never had so much fun tilting,
> doe
>
> _________________________________________________________________
> Posted using RecPoker.com - http://www.recpoker.com
>
>
>
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Peter Lizak
pli...@math.uwaterloo.ca
Scientific Computing Lab, University of Waterloo
Railz
<snip>
Did you at least try and circle him? :)
oil doe
It's Rock-Paper-Stone where I come from.
On Jul 13 2003 9:45PM, Railz wrote:
> On Jul 13 2003 11:01AM, oil doe wrote:
>
> <snip>
>
> Did you at least try and circle him? :)
It was the last day of my trip and I was pretty sleep deprived. Although
this trip didn't break any records - and my personal best still stands at
18.5 hour for six nights. I thought even in this weakened state I could
take Lennie at Roshambo - but knew that Perry could take me with his hands
tied behind his back. (Maybe Rock-Paper-Scissors is the east coast
vernacular - 10 years in Texas hasn't cured all my east coast ills)
I had the perfect circle opportunity. We were discussing an over/under
bet on a player's weight. The bet then shifted to a girth vs height
over/under. There was a lot of discussion on where to measure the girth
from - as there were many possible points where a maximum might have been
achieved. Unfortunately just as I was about to suggest a point below the
waist - "how about from here?" - a dramatic hand ensued at the final table
- and my opportunity was lost.
Obviously I have a lot of training to do before my next tiltboy encounter.
barney_...@yahoo.com
> On 13 Jul 2003, oil doe wrote:
>
> > The high point of my encounter was when a few of my one-liners actually
> > got a verbal drum fill from the boys. My low point and sad to say -
> I
> > never did get in a game of Roshambo (Rock-Paper-Scissors') with the boys
> > before I had to leave. Hopefully there will be another time.
>
> Maybe they feared your Roshambo skill?? I
>
> It's Rock-Paper-Stone where I come from.
>
OK I'll take Paper!
Peter Lizak
That's the whole point of calling it that. Roshambo is a mental game. I
just beat you.
P
oil doe
expect that I expected that - so I would have gone with it anyway. Bottom
Line: I would have overcompensated.
_________________________________________________________________
Peter Lizak
> Now, see, I expected that - but then I would have thought that you might
> expect that I expected that - so I would have gone with it anyway. Bottom
> Line: I would have overcompensated.
You ever come to canada, we can play some roshambo :)
P
Perry Friedman
I think some other posters missed this. I believe some poeple call the game
rock-paper-scissors, or scissors-paper-stone, but rock-paper-stone really
does give "paper" a big advantage.
Perry
aka Roshamboy
barney_...@yahoo.com
> On 14 Jul 2003 barney_...@yahoo.com wrote:
>
> > Peter Lizak <pli...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca> wrote in message news:<Pine.SOL.4.44.030714...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca>...
> > >
> > >
> >
> > OK I'll take Paper!
>
> That's the whole point of calling it that. Roshambo is a mental game. I
> just beat you.
>
> P
>
Point was, in Rock-Paper-Stone, which they play where you come from,
Paper is the nuts.
You must have meant Scissors-Paper-Stone, which they call it where I
come from.
Peter Lizak
> Peter Lizak <pli...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca> wrote in message news:<Pine.SOL.4.44.030714...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca>...
> > On 14 Jul 2003 barney_...@yahoo.com wrote:
> >
> > > Peter Lizak <pli...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca> wrote in message news:<Pine.SOL.4.44.030714...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca>...
> > > >
> > > > It's Rock-Paper-Stone where I come from.
> > > >
> > >
> > > OK I'll take Paper!
> >
> > That's the whole point of calling it that. Roshambo is a mental game. I
> > just beat you.
> >
> > P
> >
>
> Point was, in Rock-Paper-Stone, which they play where you come from,
> Paper is the nuts.
>
> You must have meant Scissors-Paper-Stone, which they call it where I
> come from.
No, no, we call it Rock-Paper-Stone, but you can still play scissors.
Gary Carson
>
>No, no, we call it Rock-Paper-Stone, but you can still play scissors.
>
It's that french influence in Canada.
Gary Carson
List of Top Ten Gambling Books
http://garycarson.rediffblogs.com/
Peter Lizak
> On Tue, 15 Jul 2003 14:12:18 -0400, Peter Lizak
>
> >
> >No, no, we call it Rock-Paper-Stone, but you can still play scissors.
> >
>
> It's that french influence in Canada.
No, no, nothing to do with the French, I live in a German town.
P
>
> Gary Carson
> List of Top Ten Gambling Books
> http://garycarson.rediffblogs.com/
>
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Gary Carson
<pli...@pythagoras.math.uwaterloo.ca> wrote:
>On Tue, 15 Jul 2003, Gary Carson wrote:
>
>> On Tue, 15 Jul 2003 14:12:18 -0400, Peter Lizak
>>
>> >
>> >No, no, we call it Rock-Paper-Stone, but you can still play
scissors.
>> >
>>
>> It's that french influence in Canada.
>
>No, no, nothing to do with the French, I live in a German town.
>
The Texas Hill Country was settled by German's in the early 19th
century. The Hill Country is in Central Texas, Small hills of scrub
cedar and caliche rock. About the only thing that will grow on it is
cedar and goats. And, the cedar won't get over about five feet tall.
Anyway, these German farmers were having trouble making a living in
the rocky hillsides they were farming on in Germany and some Prince
gathered a bunch of them up and got some land promosed from Mexico if
they'd settle it.
They landed in Indinola, or someplace along the coast, and walked
across a couple hundred unihabited miles of some the richest black
dirt on the praire until they found the Hill Country. "Farm Land",
they announced, and settled in to spend a few decades trying to raise
crops and failing at it.
Peter Lizak
> The Texas Hill Country was settled by German's in the early 19th
> century. The Hill Country is in Central Texas, Small hills of scrub
> cedar and caliche rock. About the only thing that will grow on it is
> cedar and goats. And, the cedar won't get over about five feet tall.
>
> Anyway, these German farmers were having trouble making a living in
> the rocky hillsides they were farming on in Germany and some Prince
> gathered a bunch of them up and got some land promosed from Mexico if
> they'd settle it.
>
> They landed in Indinola, or someplace along the coast, and walked
> across a couple hundred unihabited miles of some the richest black
> dirt on the praire until they found the Hill Country. "Farm Land",
> they announced, and settled in to spend a few decades trying to raise
> crops and failing at it.
Nice story, does it go anywhere?
P
>
> Gary Carson
> List of Top Ten Gambling Books
> http://garycarson.rediffblogs.com/
>
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