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The Ranger

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Aug 24, 2008, 1:54:49 PM8/24/08
to
I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."

I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and
voiced that opinion.

I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked
would be immediately actionable. The little snot would find
themselves out the door and on the porch before they finished
breathing.

My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank
you notes, bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in
a timely manner but to EVERY invitation, and always stressed
the cliché "if you don't have any thing nice to say don't say
anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
doesn't mean you should say it.")

I've also passed this important knowledge on to my
daughter-units since day one. It stuns other parents when my
girls respond to RSVP quickly, write thank you notes, always
say please and thank you, and have never turned a dish away
because they might not like it.

Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable
etiquette? Were these concepts important in your family? Do you
consider them important? Who stressed them more, a specific
family member or a friend?

* Generic; not specific.

The Ranger


sf

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:03:53 PM8/24/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 10:54:49 -0700, "The Ranger"
<cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote:

>Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable
>etiquette?

yes

>Were these concepts important in your family?

Yes

> Do you consider them important?

People are judged by their manners.

>Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?

My grandmother, of course. I think it's a grandparent's job by
default these days. Moms are too busy bringing home the bacon,
cooking it and keeping the little snots clean.

;)


--
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.

Mae West

Message has been deleted

hahabogus

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:15:03 PM8/24/08
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"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in news:ia-
dnec8rOL2PSzVn...@posted.rawbandwidth:

I'm diplomactically truthful...On saturday I had some marinated
mushrooms....way, way too much raw garlic (6 cloves plus). I replied that
they were tasty but a had a bit of a bite to my tastes. I did rave over
the citrus mayo though I did find it very toothsome. And complimented the
scallops nicely.

--

The house of the burning beet-Alan

The Ranger

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:18:15 PM8/24/08
to
Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in message
news:240808.1309...@sqwertz.com...
> The Ranger <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote:

>> (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
>> doesn't mean you should say it.")
>>

> Sure you have, hypocrite.

You're a perfect example. There are dozens of times I've
thought of more appropriate things to say to you but have
simply let them go unstated.

The Ranger


TFM®

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:36:46 PM8/24/08
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"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:ia-dnec8rOL2PSzV...@posted.rawbandwidth...


But of course! My Daddy would have beat the dogshit out of me had I said
anything like that at someone else's house.

We always politely ate, thanked the host(s) and then bitched and moaned
about the nastiness level on the ride home. But to tell someone that their
considerable effort expended is shit, to their face, is just wrong.

It *is* the thought that counts, and not everybody can cook well.


TFM®

Andy

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:42:57 PM8/24/08
to
The Ranger said...

> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked
> would be immediately actionable.


Ranger,

LOLOL!!!

Give 'em time to grow up!

Mistakes WILL be made along the way.

LOLOL!!!

Best,

Andy

The Ranger

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:43:42 PM8/24/08
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TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote in message
news:48b1aa76$0$23185$ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com...

> [..] My Daddy would have beat the dogshit out


> of me had I said anything like that at someone
> else's house.
>
> We always politely ate, thanked the host(s) and
> then bitched and moaned about the nastiness level
> on the ride home. But to tell someone that their
> considerable effort expended is shit, to their face,

> is just wrong. [..]

Heh. My Father-unit was a direct man, too, with similar
sensibilities. Gahds forbid I pulled something so blatantly
brainless; he'd've sent me packing to the Hear-after with a
heavy anvil.

The Ranger


Giusi

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:30:26 PM8/24/08
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"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> ha scritto nel messaggio
news:ia-dnec8rOL2PSzV...@posted.rawbandwidth...

They were only important if you wanted to grow up.

I often wonder what these careless parents think their kids are going to do
if the ever get a chance to outgrow their circumstances. Like we say that
every American kid can grow up to be President, but let me tell you, no
political selection committee is picking someone who eats like a barnyard
animal. People often get checked out before being given certain
opportunities abroad or at upper echelons of business for the same reason.

My friend was just telling me about a book she is reading, titled The Age f
American Unreason, and being proud of being crude would fit right into the
madness represented.


Message has been deleted

Sheldon

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:53:27 PM8/24/08
to
"The Ranger" wrote:
>
> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank
> you notes, bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in
> a timely manner but to EVERY invitation, and always stressed
> the clich� "if you don't have any thing nice to say don't say

> anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
> doesn't mean you should say it.")

Yeah, but okay to type it.

Kathleen

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Aug 24, 2008, 2:59:12 PM8/24/08
to
The Ranger wrote:
> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>
> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and
> voiced that opinion.
>
> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked
> would be immediately actionable. The little snot would find
> themselves out the door and on the porch before they finished
> breathing.

Absolutely.

By the time my kids were three they knew how to say, "No thank you, I
don't care for any". They knew not to ask for something different, but
they were allowed to say no to things they didn't want.

My mother the human bulldozer, though was a real trial of their manners.
She would insist on plopping servings of foods they despised (and
these were actually very few items) onto their plates, and then try to
insist that they be consumed. And she'd do this in my presence, after I
told them they didn't have to. Quiet conversations about not
undermining my authority and teaching them that expressing their
preferences politely would only get them ignored went unheeded.

What stopped it, finally, was my mother trying to serve my daughter (not
quite 4 at the time) canned spinach - truly disgusting - after she had
politely declined it. My mother dug the serving spoon into the stuff
and my daughter, red in the face and with tears in her eyes, stood up,
pointed her finger at my mom and said, "YOU are not the boss of me. SHE
is the boss of me, and HE is the boss of me (pointing at me and my
husband) but YOU are not the boss of me."

At that point, my dad, my sister and her husband and their two kids were
falling out of their chairs laughing. I'd have been mad at DD, but in
point of fact, my mother was being quite rude herself. Since then, any
time my mother the control freak gets into a power struggle over
something that should be a non-issue she gets to hear, "YOU are not the
boss of me".

>
> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank
> you notes, bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in
> a timely manner but to EVERY invitation, and always stressed
> the cliché "if you don't have any thing nice to say don't say
> anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
> doesn't mean you should say it.")

I tell mine, in the world we live in, the only real privacy we have is
in the space between our ears. Treasure that. Guard it. Every thought
that crosses your mind need not be verbalized.

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 3:36:48 PM8/24/08
to
"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in news:ia-
dnec8rOL2PSzVn...@posted.rawbandwidth:

> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>
> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and
> voiced that opinion.
>
> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked
> would be immediately actionable. The little snot would find
> themselves out the door and on the porch before they finished
> breathing.
>

I have no compunctions about telling children who are guests in my home
that their behavior is not appropriate. I don't mind "I don't like this
kind of food" from the six-year old set my daughter is in, but if
anyone, even an adult, said that something "sucked" (unless I said it
first and they were a good friend and agreeing with me), I would ask
them to leave.

> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank
> you notes, bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in
> a timely manner but to EVERY invitation, and always stressed
> the cliché "if you don't have any thing nice to say don't say
> anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
> doesn't mean you should say it.")
>
> I've also passed this important knowledge on to my
> daughter-units since day one. It stuns other parents when my
> girls respond to RSVP quickly, write thank you notes, always
> say please and thank you, and have never turned a dish away
> because they might not like it.
>
> Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable
> etiquette? Were these concepts important in your family? Do you
> consider them important? Who stressed them more, a specific
> family member or a friend?
>
> * Generic; not specific.

Both of my parents, both sets of grandparents, and various adult
relatives all stressed the importance of proper behavior, especially at
other people's homes. My Imma and her sisters and her mom are
particularly concerned with mannerly behavior. My mom *still* reminds me
to rsvp and send thank you notes (mainly on behalf of my daughter, at
this point). I bought my daughter a copy of "manners" by Aliki
Brandenburg, and I think it illustrates (no pun intended) the very heart
of proper manners- to make everyone around you comfortable, and as I put
it "no one wants to associate with a jerk".

I hate to admit that I am horrible about sending thank you notes and
rsvps (but as I am getting older, and doing more entertaining, I am
better about it), but I am very grateful and thankful for the things
people do for me in person, at least, and I realize my inability to
respond timely is a character fault that needs to be improved upon.


--
Saerah

"Welcome to Usenet, Biatch! Adapt or haul ass!"
- some hillbilly from FL

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 3:39:01 PM8/24/08
to
"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:zOKdnaDPJ713OCzV...@posted.rawbandwidth:

Usenet is not real life. Not exactly, anyhow. I also have few
compunctions about being a bit of a bitch in the electronic realm ;)

George Shirley

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Aug 24, 2008, 3:43:39 PM8/24/08
to
Amen! Both parents enforced the idea of common courtesy, manners, chew
with your mouth closed, RSVP where needed, Yes Sir, No Sir and Yes
Ma'am, No Ma'am, respect the police, you might need them one day. Obey
all laws, whether you like them or not. Of course both my parents were
born in the first quarter of the twentieth century and I was born in the
first half of that century. Doing such things was very common then.

Billy

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Aug 24, 2008, 3:45:13 PM8/24/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:39:01 GMT, sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com>
wrote:

> I also have few
>compunctions about being a bit of a bitch in the electronic realm ;)

Why? It won't accomplish anything.

The more you anger people, the more likely they won't read anything
you have to say. You have contributed some very valuable information
here.

cybercat

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Aug 24, 2008, 3:54:39 PM8/24/08
to

"sarah gray" <anis...@oohay.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9B049F3241FB5...@207.115.33.102...

> "The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in
> news:zOKdnaDPJ713OCzV...@posted.rawbandwidth:
>
>> Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in message
>> news:240808.1309...@sqwertz.com...
>>> The Ranger <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>>
>>>> (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it
>>>> doesn't mean you should say it.")
>>>>
>>> Sure you have, hypocrite.
>>
>> You're a perfect example. There are dozens of times I've
>> thought of more appropriate things to say to you but have
>> simply let them go unstated.
>>
>
> Usenet is not real life. Not exactly, anyhow. I also have few
> compunctions about being a bit of a bitch in the electronic realm ;)
>
>

If only you were better at it.


Message has been deleted

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:00:43 PM8/24/08
to
Andy <q> wrote in news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136:

Telling a host that their food "sucks" is inexcusable, be it adult or
child who says it. Either way, they would not not be invited to my home
again. It's not a mistake, it's a inherently defective quality.

Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:06:22 PM8/24/08
to
Billy <Hereiam@hotmaildotcom> wrote in
news:qde3b41vs6dj18ocn...@4ax.com:

> On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:39:01 GMT, sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com>
> wrote:
>
>> I also have few
>>compunctions about being a bit of a bitch in the electronic realm ;)
>
> Why? It won't accomplish anything.
>

Pot, kettle, black.

> The more you anger people, the more likely they won't read anything
> you have to say. You have contributed some very valuable information
> here.
>
>
>
>

I said "bit of a bitch", not "a complete looney raving bitch". BIG
difference there. I try to limit my bitchiness to idiots and jerks, so
I'm not too worried about whether they care to read what I have to say
afterwards.

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:06:47 PM8/24/08
to
"cybercat" <cyber...@yahoo.com> wrote in news:g8se9m$2tn$1
@registered.motzarella.org:

If only I knew you a few years ago...

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:13:54 PM8/24/08
to
"Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:

> Andy <q> news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136: in
> rec.food.cooking

>
>>
>> Ranger,
>>
>> LOLOL!!!
>>
>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>>
>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>>
>> LOLOL!!!
>

> I say send 'em to the moon and bring 'em back when they're fit to
> integrate into society. Send the parents with 'em.
>
> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
>
>

oooh! please, do tell!

--
Saerah (yes, she is pathetic enough to want to hear about gossip from
someone she has never met :>)

Message has been deleted

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:26:50 PM8/24/08
to
"Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
news:Xns9B049B9D83B4...@69.16.185.250:

> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com>
> news:Xns9B04A4B9A7BB6anisaerahoohaycom@ 207.115.17.102: in
> rec.food.cooking

>
>> "Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
>> news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:
>>
>>> Andy <q> news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136: in
>>> rec.food.cooking
>>>
>>>>
>>>> Ranger,
>>>>
>>>> LOLOL!!!
>>>>
>>>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>>>>
>>>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>>>>
>>>> LOLOL!!!
>>>
>>> I say send 'em to the moon and bring 'em back when they're fit to
>>> integrate into society. Send the parents with 'em.
>>>
>>> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
>>>
>>>
>>
>> oooh! please, do tell!
>

> Child rolling around on those tennis shoes with wheels in the parking
> lot of Petsmart. Parent, stupidly thinking they were playing with
> child, grabs child's hand and proceeds to roll child around in
> circles. Child hits patch of gravel on lot, falls and rolls head over
> heels into a light pole. Lots and lots of blood all over the place and
> big gash on child's head. It was ugly. My guess is that the clueless
> parent has already contacted an attorney wanting to sue Petsmart
> because there was loose gravel on the parking lot.
>

I guess I am a Bad Person, because if I had seen that, I would have
pointed out to my daughter that that is why I won't buy them for her.
the kid was probably ok; head wounds always bleed a lot. (and my kid
knows about that; she has a scar from when she was 2 and ran into the
corner of a wall)

What exactly is negligent about having loose gravel in a parking lot?
Was the parent blind?


--
Saerah

Dimitri

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:25:21 PM8/24/08
to

"sf" wrote in message news:6a83b4h576m2r1csd...@4ax.com...

> On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 10:54:49 -0700, "The Ranger"
> <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>>Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable
>>etiquette?

Taught no - it was beaten into me.

>>Were these concepts important in your family?

More so that you can imagine

>> Do you consider them important?

Absolutely


>>Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?

Family - All family older than I was

Some rules were:

1. Wash & dress for dinner
2. Children should be seen & not heard unless spoken to directly by an
adult.
3. You may never ask for anything more that water at someone else's
house. Something offered is a different story.
4. Eat to your left & drink to your right.
5. Wait for the hostess to begin eating before starting to eat.
6. Please and thank you were mandatory.
7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants

Dimitri

dsi1

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:29:47 PM8/24/08
to

Nice bunch of folks you hang around with. :-)

A few years back, I was waiting around in an OB/GYN office and the doc
was showing a pt. and her little kid out. While they were exchanging
pleasantries, the little kid sez - "your bah-gina smells funny!" The two
adults ignored her or pretended to ignore her so she starts yelling
"YOUR BAH-GINA SMELLS FUNNY! YOUR BAH-GINA SMELLS FUNNY!!!!"

All in all, if a kid tells you that your food sucks, don't sweat it. It
could be a lot worse. My kids tell me my food sucks all the time. Yeah,
like I care. :-)

By the way, I was sitting 10 feet away and her bah-gina was making me
feel a bit sea-sick...


The Ranger wrote:
> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>
> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and
> voiced that opinion.
>

> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked

> would be immediately actionable. The little snot would find
> themselves out the door and on the porch before they finished
> breathing.
>
> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank
> you notes, bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in
> a timely manner but to EVERY invitation, and always stressed
> the cliché "if you don't have any thing nice to say don't say

> anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because you can think it

> doesn't mean you should say it.")
>

> I've also passed this important knowledge on to my
> daughter-units since day one. It stuns other parents when my
> girls respond to RSVP quickly, write thank you notes, always
> say please and thank you, and have never turned a dish away
> because they might not like it.
>

> Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable

> etiquette? Were these concepts important in your family? Do you
> consider them important? Who stressed them more, a specific

> family member or a friend?
>

cshenk

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:40:11 PM8/24/08
to
"The Ranger" wrote

>I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they had no clue
>about basic manners and their kids thought nothing about telling a
>host(ess) that the food served "sucked."

Why would a person brag about being a low class idiot? The mind boggles.

> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and voiced that
> opinion.

I would simply not associate with such people. If they pushed it, I would
remind them that a little chlorine in the gene pool at their inception might
have been a nice thing.

> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked would be
> immediately actionable. The little snot would find themselves out the door
> and on the porch before they finished breathing.

I would only give creedence to the kid under age 6 but thats because I am
very multicultural and my idea of 'fish sticks' is a whole cleaned fish on a
stick. Apt to generate a few 'oh my ghod' sort of comments but generally
the kids love my food. (Oh, do not serve american fish sticks to Japanese
kids. They tend to be suitably and equally horrified at our version).

> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank you notes,
> bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in a timely manner but
> to EVERY invitation, and always stressed the cliché "if you don't have any
> thing nice to say don't say anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because
> you can think it doesn't mean you should say it.")

Mine too, but my sister over does it on the invites. We aint rich folks and
she wants the fancy paper sort of return 'sorry cant make it' vice an email.
That was problematic as her invites often arrived after the event (3 week
mail delay).

> I've also passed this important knowledge on to my daughter-units since
> day one. It stuns other parents when my girls respond to RSVP quickly,
> write thank you notes, always say please and thank you, and have never
> turned a dish away because they might not like it.

I teach Charlotte to be *polite* if refusing a dish. 'Thank you but my
system gets wierd if I eat too much sugar, a bit like a diabetic'. It works
well and no one minds if she passes on the sweets.

> Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable etiquette? Were
> these concepts important in your family? Do you consider them important?
> Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?
>
> * Generic; not specific.

Mom stressed them but then, Dad was living in California by then while we
were in Florida. They split when I was just under 2 but officially divorced
when I was about 5?


Billy

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:45:55 PM8/24/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 20:06:22 GMT, sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com>
wrote:

>I'm not too worried about whether they care to read

You are right. I have decided I don't really care what you have to
say. Give a bitch a compliment and she snaps, bites and claws.

beth thomas

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:48:31 PM8/24/08
to

"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:ia-dnec8rOL2PSzV...@posted.rawbandwidth...

>I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they had no clue
>about basic manners and their kids thought nothing about telling a
>host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>
> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and voiced that
> opinion.
>
> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked would be
> immediately actionable. The little snot would find themselves out the door
> and on the porch before they finished breathing.
>
> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank you notes,
> bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in a timely manner but
> to EVERY invitation, and always stressed the cliché "if you don't have any
> thing nice to say don't say anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because
> you can think it doesn't mean you should say it.")
>
> I've also passed this important knowledge on to my daughter-units since
> day one. It stuns other parents when my girls respond to RSVP quickly,
> write thank you notes, always say please and thank you, and have never
> turned a dish away because they might not like it.
>
> Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable etiquette? Were
> these concepts important in your family? Do you consider them important?
> Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?
>
> * Generic; not specific.
>
> The Ranger

I don't get folks thinking that lack of manners is charming or 'freedom' for
a child. Drives me crazy, and while I have never asked a kid to leave my
house (yet, teen years fast approaching) I have shared with my kids which
friends are not to be invited back and why. Now, my kids can be a little
less than lovely at home sometimes, but it would NEVER be allowed to another
adult.

As for food you do not care for, at least take a spoonful and push it
around, try it if it not too scary. Always say please and thank you, and
offer to help if appropriate.
Treat your friends' moms like you would want them to treat me, and
remember.... we live in a little bitty town and I will hear
everysinglesolitary thing you do before you get home!!

Beth
>
>


sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:50:16 PM8/24/08
to
Billy <Hereiam@hotmaildotcom> wrote in
news:r2i3b4holg2vbubo7...@4ax.com:

a compliment? you sure have a strange way of expressing yourself.

Billy

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Aug 24, 2008, 4:51:09 PM8/24/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 16:48:31 -0400, "beth thomas"
<epth...@comcast.net> wrote:

> Always say please and thank you, and
>offer to help if appropriate.

Too bad that 95% of RFC's can't do that.

sarah gray

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 5:18:55 PM8/24/08
to
Billy <Hereiam@hotmaildotcom> wrote in
news:sci3b4l049mv8on95...@4ax.com:

Can you please stop posting? TIA.

The Ranger

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 5:33:56 PM8/24/08
to
[Borrowing Sarah's post. -- TR]

> Andy <q> wrote in news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136:
>> The Ranger said...
>>
>>> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being
>>> served sucked would be immediately actionable.
>>
>> LOLOL!!!
>>
>> Give 'em time to grow up!

I did. From the time I picked them up from the table all the
way to the front door.

>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.

If they're old enough to use specific words and phrases,
they're old enough to take the consequences that come with
using them inappropriately.

The Ranger


Message has been deleted

sarah gray

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 5:46:23 PM8/24/08
to
"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:0sadnUIFrMZUTizV...@posted.rawbandwidth:


Which is exactly why "I don't like this" from a small child does not
upset me and "this sucks" would.

Saerah

sarah gray

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Aug 24, 2008, 5:50:12 PM8/24/08
to
Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in news:240808.164150rfc973.290
@sqwertz.com:

> Piss and moan, piss and moan.
>
> ObFood: Slow roasted crispy duck with barley pilaf and some sort of
> vegetable for dinner tonight.
>
> -sw
>

Duck and barley sound like they would be really good together.

The Ranger

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 6:09:50 PM8/24/08
to
sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9B04B4CA28D5C...@207.115.17.102...

> "The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in
> news:0sadnUIFrMZUTizV...@posted.rawbandwidth:

>>>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.


>>>>
>> If they're old enough to use specific words and phrases,
>> they're old enough to take the consequences that come
>> with using them inappropriately.
>>
> Which is exactly why "I don't like this" from a small child
> does not upset me and "this sucks" would.

One of those nitwits I mentioned thought he was very hip
calling everything "gay." It's recycled slang among the
middle-schoolers and as inappropriate now as it was back in the
late-70s and early-80s. He went quiet after I explained his
lack of vocabulary spoke more clearly of his ignorance than his
hipness. (He also led the charge about manners being old school
anachronisms.)

The Ranger


Message has been deleted

Paul M. Cook

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 7:26:17 PM8/24/08
to

"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:ia-dnec8rOL2PSzV...@posted.rawbandwidth...
>I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they had no clue
>about basic manners and their kids thought nothing about telling a
>host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>
> I was a little peeved about their laizzez-faire attitudes and voiced that
> opinion.
>
> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked would be
> immediately actionable. The little snot would find themselves out the door
> and on the porch before they finished breathing.
>
> My Sainted Mother(tm) taught me several things: Writing thank you notes,
> bringing a hostess a minor gift, RSVPing not only in a timely manner but
> to EVERY invitation, and always stressed the cliché "if you don't have any
> thing nice to say don't say anything." (I've modified it to, "Just because
> you can think it doesn't mean you should say it.")
>
> I've also passed this important knowledge on to my daughter-units since
> day one. It stuns other parents when my girls respond to RSVP quickly,
> write thank you notes, always say please and thank you, and have never
> turned a dish away because they might not like it.
>
> Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable etiquette? Were
> these concepts important in your family? Do you consider them important?
> Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?


Kids aren't the only ones who act like that. I had a few people over for
Christmas dinner and despite my best efforts and one hell of a spread
nothing I did was good enough for this one guest who carped and complained
to the point I almost told her to leave. She didn't even like the napkins
because they weren't her favorite color.

The modern school of parenting is that you don't actually parent kids, you
let them "make their own choices." One day they will grow up and self
correct all the bad habits and rotten behavior the parents let them get away
with. Of course that never happens they frow up to be nasty, rude, crude
and generally disgusting adults.

Paul


Joseph Littleshoes

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 9:25:03 PM8/24/08
to
The Ranger wrote:
> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."


I have even less tolerance for so called 'adults' who do the same thing.

Ever have some one, an "adult" pull up a chair to a buffet table and
start chowing down? That was the only time i have ever thrown some one
out of my house, and that only after a polite suggestion to desist was
ignored.
--
JL

Terry Pulliam Burd

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 9:34:59 PM8/24/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 13:25:21 -0700, "Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net>
fired up random neurons and synapses to opine:

>Some rules were:
>
>1. Wash & dress for dinner
>2. Children should be seen & not heard unless spoken to directly by an
>adult.
>3. You may never ask for anything more that water at someone else's
>house. Something offered is a different story.
>4. Eat to your left & drink to your right.
>5. Wait for the hostess to begin eating before starting to eat.
>6. Please and thank you were mandatory.
>7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants

Might I add:

Once a dinner invitation is accepted, the only possible reason for the
invitee's absence is the dinner's attendance by his/her executor ;->

Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd
--
"If the soup had been as hot as the claret, if the claret had been as
old as the bird, and if the bird's breasts had been as full as the
waitress's, it would have been a very good dinner."

-- Duncan Hines

To reply, replace "meatloaf" with "cox"


Julia Altshuler

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 10:08:10 PM8/24/08
to
The Ranger wrote:
> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."


"Exposed to." I'm getting the feeling that there's a story behind this,
a story I'm curious to hear. Were these the parents of some of your
daughters' school friends? What was the context of the bragging? Was
the idea that their children weren't shy? That the children were
outspoken? How old were the children in question? I'm trying to
imagine the scenario and can't fill in all the blanks.


--Lia

Blinky the Shark

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 10:40:31 PM8/24/08
to
Julia Altshuler wrote:

Sounds like the whole family probably eats with their hands and the
males lift their legs on the nearest piece of furniture.


--
Blinky
Killing all posts from Google Groups
The Usenet Improvement Project: http://improve-usenet.org
Need a new news feed? http://blinkynet.net/comp/newfeed.html

Debbie

unread,
Aug 24, 2008, 10:51:03 PM8/24/08
to

"Terry Pulliam Burd" <ntpu...@meatloaf.net> wrote in message
news:nu24b4lsrsuqjlo06...@4ax.com...

> On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 13:25:21 -0700, "Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net>
> fired up random neurons and synapses to opine:
>
>>Some rules were:
>>
>>1. Wash & dress for dinner
>>2. Children should be seen & not heard unless spoken to directly by an
>>adult.
>>3. You may never ask for anything more that water at someone else's
>>house. Something offered is a different story.
>>4. Eat to your left & drink to your right.
>>5. Wait for the hostess to begin eating before starting to eat.
>>6. Please and thank you were mandatory.
>>7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants
>
> Might I add:
>
> Once a dinner invitation is accepted, the only possible reason for the
> invitee's absence is the dinner's attendance by his/her executor ;->
>

I'll 2nd that, had 2 families, a total of 5 people pull out at the last
minute from a Canada day BBQ I had invited them too. That was after asking
me the day before if there was anything they could bring. The entire
make-up of the group was affected and some of my choices seemed off because
of it.

Debbie

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:05:16 AM8/25/08
to

"sarah gray" <anis...@oohay.com> wrote in message

news:Xns9B04A27D8E032...@207.115.17.102...


> Andy <q> wrote in news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136:
>
>> The Ranger said...
>>

>>> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being served sucked
>>> would be immediately actionable.
>>
>>

>> Ranger,


>>
>> LOLOL!!!
>>
>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>>

>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>>

>> LOLOL!!!
>>
>> Best,
>>
>> Andy
>>
>
> Telling a host that their food "sucks" is inexcusable, be it adult or
> child who says it. Either way, they would not not be invited to my home
> again. It's not a mistake, it's a inherently defective quality.


Even if my host served roasted ass in cat puke, when asked how it tastes,
I'd say, "It's not bad".

That would be the worst thing I would say.

After all, what's the benchmark for such a dish? <G>


TFM® - who has unknowingly served sub-par grub to guests.

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:25:55 AM8/25/08
to

"sarah gray" <anis...@oohay.com> wrote in message

news:Xns9B04B4CA28D5C...@207.115.17.102...


> "The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in
> news:0sadnUIFrMZUTizV...@posted.rawbandwidth:
>
>> [Borrowing Sarah's post. -- TR]
>>> Andy <q> wrote in news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136:
>>>> The Ranger said...
>>>>
>>>>> I'm no saint but to tell me that the food being
>>>>> served sucked would be immediately actionable.
>>>>
>>>> LOLOL!!!
>>>>
>>>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>>
>> I did. From the time I picked them up from the table all the
>> way to the front door.
>>
>>>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>>
>> If they're old enough to use specific words and phrases,
>> they're old enough to take the consequences that come with
>> using them inappropriately.
>
>
> Which is exactly why "I don't like this" from a small child does not
> upset me and "this sucks" would.


I was about 10 years old...

Eating at my Aunt and Uncle's house with my parents.

Dried lima beans cooked with hamhocks. Today that would be one of my
favorite foods. Couldn't stand it as a child.

I repeatedly said, "Mama, I don't like this. I don't want to eat it."

They made me eat it...all.

Projectile vomiting ensued.

There's not much of a point to this story, but if I'd said it "sucked", I
would have been backhanded away from the table at a high rate of speed.


How do we segue to the point in my life where I was in Wal-Mart with my son?

He'd been used to getting his way with his Mother and Grandmother, and
proceeded to pitch a fit.

Wahhh! Wahhh! I want...

I said, "Boy, I'll beat your ass right here in front of everybody!"

He thought I was shitting him. I reckon a man would go to jail for that
now.

He grew up to be a fine young man. He just recently got married and I'm a
Grandfather.

He's 23 BTW. Never had to whip his ass more than once.

TFM®


TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:38:55 AM8/25/08
to

"The Ranger" <cuhula...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:x_udnWW2bbesQSzV...@posted.rawbandwidth...


Being a 42 year old hippie, redneck, hillbilly, my slang is as out there as
it gets.

Being said 42 year old hillbilly, etc., it's understandable that my tongue
may slip once every now and then. Those who know me can laugh here.

There is no excuse for a child speaking in such a manner.


TFM®

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:45:44 AM8/25/08
to

"Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net> wrote

> 7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants


That speaks volumes about the difference in your upbringing and mine. I was
the servant.

I was nonetheless taught manners, and they were enforced.


TFM®

Wayne Boatwright

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 2:03:52 AM8/25/08
to
On Sun 24 Aug 2008 10:45:44p, TFM® told us...

I grew up in a household that had a housekeeper, maid, and gardener, but
that wasn't out of the ordinary for my parents' circle of friends. Proper
manners and etiquette were a given in our home and gently reenforced. This
also seemed to be a given among family friends and schoolmates, and I don't
remember seeing bad manners until I left for college. I guess I grew up in
a very sheltered environment.

--
Wayne Boatwright

*******************************************
Date: Sunday, 08(VIII)/24(XXIV)/08(MMVIII)
*******************************************
Countdown till Labor Day
1wks 1hrs 4mins
*******************************************
Daddy, what does FORMATTING DRIVE C: mean?
*******************************************

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 2:21:34 AM8/25/08
to

"Sqwertz" <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in message
news:240808.1714...@sqwertz.com...


> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com> wrote:
>
>> Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in news:240808.164150rfc973.290
>> @sqwertz.com:
>>

>>> ObFood: Slow roasted crispy duck with barley pilaf and some sort of
>>> vegetable for dinner tonight.
>>

>> Duck and barley sound like they would be really good together.
>

> Was out of wild rice, so this is the next best thing. I think I
> cooked the barley...

Well it's good to have a clue.

Jes' pickin' at ye.

I want duck now.
TFM®

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 3:04:15 AM8/25/08
to

"Joseph Littleshoes" <jpst...@isp.com> wrote in message
news:ea129$48b209f4$4396f726$50...@DIALUPUSA.NET...

I would have done the same.

I've thrown a lot of people out, forcibly.

You act like an ass, you get treated like an ass.


TFM®

Nancy Young

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 8:00:54 AM8/25/08
to

"sarah gray" <anis...@oohay.com> wrote

> Which is exactly why "I don't like this" from a small child does not
> upset me and "this sucks" would.

My brother's pretty strict with his kids, gee, wonder where
he got that. They are nice kids anyway. Heh.

A couple of Tdays ago, my sil (not that brother's wife) asked
me to bring Jill's butternut squash soup. Little nephew was
seated next to me. I could see him looking at the soup in
front of him and you didn't need to be a mind reader to figure
out what he was thinking.

I said, really low, you don't have to eat it. That put a smile
on his face. He sure as hell didn't sit there and say This Sucks!

nancy

Saerah Gray

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Aug 25, 2008, 8:26:10 AM8/25/08
to
TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote in
news:48b24299$0$23167$ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com:

hee!

I tell my daughter to not tell people she does not like their cooking,
but I don't expect every kid that comes in my door to have impeccable
manners. She does, however, come home and ask me why other people's moms
are not good cooks, heh.

Andy

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:18:17 AM8/25/08
to
Nancy Young said...


nancy,

Heh heh heh heh heh!

Growing up, I was preached "how do you know you don't like it if you don't
try it!" :D

Best,

Andy
Bread & butter

maxine in ri

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:33:30 AM8/25/08
to
On Aug 24, 2:03 pm, sf wrote:
> On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 10:54:49 -0700, "The Ranger"

>
> <cuhulain_...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> >Were "you*" taught proper manners and socially acceptable
> >etiquette?
>
> yes

>
> >Were these concepts important in your family?
>
> Yes

>
> > Do you consider them important?
>
> People are judged by their manners.

>
> >Who stressed them more, a specific family member or a friend?
>
> My grandmother, of course. I think it's a grandparent's job by
> default these days. Moms are too busy bringing home the bacon,
> cooking it and keeping the little snots clean.
>
> ;)
I beg to differ. I taught my DD most of those things (I was lax on
the hostess gift part), while working, and caring for the household.

maxine in ri

Nancy Young

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:34:17 AM8/25/08
to

"Andy" <q> wrote

> Nancy Young said...

>> A couple of Tdays ago, my sil (not that brother's wife) asked
>> me to bring Jill's butternut squash soup. Little nephew was
>> seated next to me. I could see him looking at the soup in
>> front of him and you didn't need to be a mind reader to figure
>> out what he was thinking.
>>
>> I said, really low, you don't have to eat it. That put a smile
>> on his face. He sure as hell didn't sit there and say This Sucks!

> Heh heh heh heh heh!


>
> Growing up, I was preached "how do you know you don't like it if you don't
> try it!" :D

I figure Thanksgiving is a good place to skip the lesson. My
memories of Thanksgiving growing up are being forced to eat
those friggin mashed turnips and canned asparagus. The kid
doesn't want the soup, leave him alone.

nancy

Andy

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:42:11 AM8/25/08
to
Andy said...

>
> "Andy" <q> wrote
>
>> Nancy Young said...
>

>> Growing up, I was preached "how do you know you don't like it if you
don't
>> try it!" :D
>

> mashed turnips


There IS such a thing?!? ICK!!!


> The kid doesn't want the soup, leave him alone.
>
> nancy


Why didn't I have you for my favorite relative?!? (smile)

Best,

Andy

blake murphy

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 11:07:26 AM8/25/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 10:54:49 -0700, The Ranger wrote:

> I was recently exposed to a group of people bragging that they
> had no clue about basic manners and their kids thought nothing
> about telling a host(ess) that the food served "sucked."
>

are they ever invited back?

your pal,
blake

blake murphy

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 11:19:13 AM8/25/08
to
On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 20:18:21 GMT, Michael "Dog3" wrote:

> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com> news:Xns9B04A4B9A7BB6anisaerahoohaycom@
> 207.115.17.102: in rec.food.cooking
>
>> "Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
>> news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:
>>>
>>> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
>>>
>>>
>>
>> oooh! please, do tell!
>
> Child rolling around on those tennis shoes with wheels in the parking lot
> of Petsmart. Parent, stupidly thinking they were playing with child,
> grabs child's hand and proceeds to roll child around in circles. Child
> hits patch of gravel on lot, falls and rolls head over heels into a light
> pole. Lots and lots of blood all over the place and big gash on child's
> head.

at least the story had a happy ending.

your pal,
blake

Wayne Boatwright

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 11:27:39 AM8/25/08
to
On Sun 24 Aug 2008 01:18:21p, Michael "Dog3" told us...

> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com> news:Xns9B04A4B9A7BB6anisaerahoohaycom@
> 207.115.17.102: in rec.food.cooking
>
>> "Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
>> news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:
>>

>>> Andy <q> news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136: in
>>> rec.food.cooking
>>>
>>>>
>>>> Ranger,


>>>>
>>>> LOLOL!!!
>>>>
>>>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>>>>

>>>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>>>>

>>>> LOLOL!!!
>>>
>>> I say send 'em to the moon and bring 'em back when they're fit to
>>> integrate into society. Send the parents with 'em.


>>>
>>> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
>>>
>>>
>>
>> oooh! please, do tell!
>
> Child rolling around on those tennis shoes with wheels in the parking lot
> of Petsmart. Parent, stupidly thinking they were playing with child,
> grabs child's hand and proceeds to roll child around in circles. Child
> hits patch of gravel on lot, falls and rolls head over heels into a light
> pole. Lots and lots of blood all over the place and big gash on child's

> head. It was ugly. My guess is that the clueless parent has already
> contacted an attorney wanting to sue Petsmart because there was loose
> gravel on the parking lot.
>
> Michael

Gee, we don't get that kind of free entertainment in our PetsMart parking
lot. :-(


--
Wayne Boatwright

*******************************************
Date: Monday, 08(VIII)/25(XXV)/08(MMVIII)


*******************************************
Countdown till Labor Day

6dys 15hrs 34mins
*******************************************
Fire, Mr. Worf! [Worf picks up
extinguisher]
*******************************************

Gregory Morrow

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 11:57:03 AM8/25/08
to

Michael "Dog3" wrote:

> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com> news:Xns9B04A4B9A7BB6anisaerahoohaycom@
> 207.115.17.102: in rec.food.cooking
>
> > "Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in
> > news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:
> >
> >> Andy <q> news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136: in
> >> rec.food.cooking
> >>
> >>>
> >>> Ranger,
> >>>
> >>> LOLOL!!!
> >>>
> >>> Give 'em time to grow up!
> >>>
> >>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
> >>>
> >>> LOLOL!!!
> >>
> >> I say send 'em to the moon and bring 'em back when they're fit to
> >> integrate into society. Send the parents with 'em.
> >>
> >> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
> >>
> >>
> >
> > oooh! please, do tell!
>
> Child rolling around on those tennis shoes with wheels in the parking lot
> of Petsmart. Parent, stupidly thinking they were playing with child,
> grabs child's hand and proceeds to roll child around in circles. Child
> hits patch of gravel on lot, falls and rolls head over heels into a light
> pole. Lots and lots of blood all over the place and big gash on child's
> head. It was ugly. My guess is that the clueless parent has already
> contacted an attorney wanting to sue Petsmart because there was loose
> gravel on the parking lot.


I would have laffed my ass off...hopefully the brat will do something to
Darwinize itself relatively soon...


--
Best
Greg

Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted

John Kane

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 12:57:45 PM8/25/08
to
On Aug 25, 11:27 am, Wayne Boatwright <wayneboatwri...@cox.net> wrote:
> On Sun 24 Aug 2008 01:18:21p, Michael "Dog3" told us...
>
>
>
>
>
> > sarah gray <anisae...@oohay.com>  news:Xns9B04A4B9A7BB6anisaerahoohaycom@
> > 207.115.17.102: in rec.food.cooking
>
> >> "Michael \"Dog3\"" <f...@good.hot> wrote in

> >>news:Xns9B0498E6F2B4...@69.16.185.247:
>
> >>> Andy <q>  news:Xns9B04956...@216.196.97.136:in
> >>> rec.food.cooking
>
> >>>> Ranger,
>
> >>>> LOLOL!!!
>
> >>>> Give 'em time to grow up!
>
> >>>> Mistakes WILL be made along the way.
>
> >>>> LOLOL!!!
>
> >>> I say send 'em to the moon and bring 'em back when they're fit to
> >>> integrate into society.  Send the parents with 'em.
>
> >>> Michael <- witnessed a bizarre parking lot incident today
>
> >> oooh! please, do tell!
>
> > Child rolling around on those tennis shoes with wheels in the parking lot
> > of Petsmart.  Parent, stupidly thinking they were playing with child,
> > grabs child's hand and proceeds to roll child around in circles.  Child
> > hits patch of gravel on lot, falls and rolls head over heels into a light
> > pole. Lots and lots of blood all over the place and big gash on child's
> > head.  It was ugly.  My guess is that the clueless parent has already
> > contacted an attorney wanting to sue Petsmart because there was loose
> > gravel on the parking lot.  
>
> > Michael
>
> Gee, we don't get that kind of free entertainment in our PetsMart parking
> lot. :-(

Take your own gravel.

John Kane Kingston ON Canada

Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted

Wayne Boatwright

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:12:34 PM8/25/08
to
On Mon 25 Aug 2008 10:00:42a, Michael "Dog3" told us...

> Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> news:240808.164150rfc973.290
> @sqwertz.com: in rec.food.cooking


>
>>
>> ObFood: Slow roasted crispy duck with barley pilaf and some sort of
>> vegetable for dinner tonight.
>

> Oh mi! My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail ;)
>
> Michael
>
>

No, there were only 4 of us. Just the right number for a card table.

--
Wayne Boatwright

*******************************************
Date: Monday, 08(VIII)/25(XXV)/08(MMVIII)
*******************************************
Countdown till Labor Day

6dys 13hrs 49mins
*******************************************
I wouldn't touch the Metric System
with a 3.048m pole!
*******************************************

Dimitri

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:20:38 PM8/25/08
to

"Terry Pulliam Burd" <ntpu...@meatloaf.net> wrote in message
news:nu24b4lsrsuqjlo06...@4ax.com...
> On Sun, 24 Aug 2008 13:25:21 -0700, "Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net>
> fired up random neurons and synapses to opine:
>
>>Some rules were:
>>
>>1. Wash & dress for dinner
>>2. Children should be seen & not heard unless spoken to directly by an
>>adult.
>>3. You may never ask for anything more that water at someone else's
>>house. Something offered is a different story.
>>4. Eat to your left & drink to your right.
>>5. Wait for the hostess to begin eating before starting to eat.
>>6. Please and thank you were mandatory.
>>7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants
>
> Might I add:
>
> Once a dinner invitation is accepted, the only possible reason for the
> invitee's absence is the dinner's attendance by his/her executor ;->
>
> Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd

LOL!

Amen!

How about NEVER dropping someone's house by without calling first?

Dimitri


Message has been deleted

Julia Altshuler

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:38:54 PM8/25/08
to
I'm trying to figure out what would prompt a child to say that the food
sucks. The only thing I can come up with is a situation where the child
has tried saying "no thank you" which has resulted in an adult telling
the child, on one way or another, that he has to eat it anyway. This
could be cajoling ("it's delicious), or force ("you'll sit there until
it's gone"), or rationalizing ("how do you know you don't like it until
you've tried it"). Either way, the child, having tried the polite
approach, looks for another way to express his desire not to eat the
offered food. When "no thank you" doesn't work, he might try "this
sucks" as a means of getting the point across.


I'm not suggesting that that's okay. I am thinking that that's the way
a 10 year old's thought processes work. If he's not given an acceptable
out, he looks for the most expedient exit he can find.


That doesn't explain the adults bragging about it. All I can figure
there is that perhaps the adults were in a relative's home. The child
has first said "no thank you." The relatives tried one of the cajoling,
force, or rationalization tactics above. Before the parent could tell
the relatives that turning down food politely is okay, the child came
out with "suck" line. At the moment, the parents were on the spot,
trying to correct the child's bad manners while understanding that the
child felt coerced into saying it. Later, the parents weren't bragging
as much as much as marveling at the child's ingenuity or
conversationally relating what happened.


At least, that's the scenario I'm dreaming up. I wasn't there.


--Lia

Goomba

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 1:56:44 PM8/25/08
to
Julia Altshuler wrote:
> I'm trying to figure out what would prompt a child to say that the food
> sucks. The only thing I can come up with is a situation where the child
> has tried saying "no thank you" which has resulted in an adult telling
> the child, on one way or another, that he has to eat it anyway. This
> could be cajoling ("it's delicious), or force ("you'll sit there until
> it's gone"), or rationalizing ("how do you know you don't like it until
> you've tried it"). Either way, the child, having tried the polite
> approach, looks for another way to express his desire not to eat the
> offered food. When "no thank you" doesn't work, he might try "this
> sucks" as a means of getting the point across.
>
>
> I'm not suggesting that that's okay. I am thinking that that's the way
> a 10 year old's thought processes work. If he's not given an acceptable
> out, he looks for the most expedient exit he can find.
>
>
I don't think he was forced to say that because he thought the polite
decline wouldn't be successful. I would take it more that he is
parroting back his parents own words or the words of youth culture.
Saying something "sucks" is very common these days.

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 2:03:06 PM8/25/08
to

"Michael "Dog3"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in message
news:Xns9B057940E157...@69.16.185.250...
> TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com>
> news:48b2473e$0$23228$ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com: in
> rec.food.cooking

> Well, I've never met you in person but your telephone manner is most
> pleasant. I suspect your table manners are impeccable as evidenced by
> your
> raised pinky while you were eating what looked to be a 10lb hamburger ;)
> Your lovely wife ratted you out and posted that pic in ABF.


Would that be the picture of me with grease running down to my elbow?

TFM®

Wayne Boatwright

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 2:08:05 PM8/25/08
to
On Mon 25 Aug 2008 10:38:54a, Julia Altshuler told us...

Lia, I fear you're giving everyone in that scenario far too much credit.
:-) It seems to me that it was just as crude, rude, unmannerly, and
unacceptable as first described. Sometimes I just can't give the benefit
of th doubt.

--
Wayne Boatwright

*******************************************
Date: Monday, 08(VIII)/25(XXV)/08(MMVIII)
*******************************************
Countdown till Labor Day

6dys 12hrs 54mins
*******************************************
There's never time to do it right, but
there is always time to do it over.
*******************************************

maxine in ri

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 2:33:37 PM8/25/08
to
On Aug 25, 1:38 pm, Julia Altshuler <jaltshu...@comcast.net> wrote:
> I'm trying to figure out what would prompt a child to say that the food
> sucks. The only thing I can come up with is a situation where the child
> has tried saying "no thank you" which has resulted in an adult telling
> the child, on one way or another, that he has to eat it anyway. This
> could be cajoling ("it's delicious), or force ("you'll sit there until
> it's gone"), or rationalizing ("how do you know you don't like it until
> you've tried it"). Either way, the child, having tried the polite
> approach, looks for another way to express his desire not to eat the
> offered food. When "no thank you" doesn't work, he might try "this
> sucks" as a means of getting the point across.

Unfortunately, there are children out there untaught in the basics of
civility who will say the most gawdawful things in an inappropriate
situation. Pity them, for they are not likely to be taught anywhere
else proper behavior.

My daughter had a friend who lived in a fantasy world. Kid would tell
us about how she was raised by wolves etc. I told her she was welcome
at our house, but to please remember to keep fantasy and truth apart.
She did after that. Middle school age. They want to be accepted, and
will follow your rules if given the opportunity and encouragement.

> I'm not suggesting that that's okay. I am thinking that that's the way
> a 10 year old's thought processes work. If he's not given an acceptable
> out, he looks for the most expedient exit he can find.
>
> That doesn't explain the adults bragging about it. All I can figure
> there is that perhaps the adults were in a relative's home. The child
> has first said "no thank you." The relatives tried one of the cajoling,
> force, or rationalization tactics above. Before the parent could tell
> the relatives that turning down food politely is okay, the child came
> out with "suck" line. At the moment, the parents were on the spot,
> trying to correct the child's bad manners while understanding that the
> child felt coerced into saying it. Later, the parents weren't bragging
> as much as much as marveling at the child's ingenuity or
> conversationally relating what happened.
>
> At least, that's the scenario I'm dreaming up. I wasn't there.
>
> --Lia

You are too kind. The kid was not learning good manners at home.

maxine in ri

Dimitri

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Aug 25, 2008, 5:40:34 PM8/25/08
to

"TFM®" <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote in message
news:48b2473e$0$23228$ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com...

>
>
> "Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net> wrote
>
>> 7. Have respect for the dignity of the servants
>
>
> That speaks volumes about the difference in your upbringing and mine. I
> was the servant.
>
> I was nonetheless taught manners, and they were enforced.
>
>
> TFM®

Hmmm I read your comment a while ago and have been thinking about an
appropriate response.

I have been dirt poor and also lived in some pretty good surroundings.

I am thoroughly convinced the saying "Money won't buy happiness" is a bull
shit myth invented by rich folks to keep the poor folks in line.

If in fact you were the servant then you deserve all the respect in the
world IHMO. I think it takes a very special person who hires themselves out
and ends up sharing in the lives of another family. I can not imagine
anything more difficult.

Dimitri

Message has been deleted

TFM®

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 6:29:13 PM8/25/08
to

"Michael "Dog3"" <fo...@good.hot> wrote in message

news:Xns9B05B0B34E21...@69.16.185.247...
> TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> news:48b2f42c$0$23177
> $ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com: in rec.food.cooking

> Of course. I just figured your tongue wasn't long enough to reach it ;)


Miscalculation on your part. It was merely very fast grease.


TFM®

TFM®

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Aug 25, 2008, 6:34:23 PM8/25/08
to

"Dimitri" <Dimi...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
news:BGFsk.18935$xZ....@nlpi070.nbdc.sbc.com...

Oh c'mon. That's not what I meant.

I, like you, was born before the advent of the remote control. I was the
remote control until I was 16 years old.

I was a kid growing up in the early 70's...an indentured servant.

I was the doer of everything my Father didn't want to do. It's ok. I
needed the exercise.


TFM®

Wayne Boatwright

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:07:39 PM8/25/08
to
On Mon 25 Aug 2008 03:34:23p, TFM® told us...

Despite the fact that I grew up in a home with live-in help, I also had my
share of "chores" and responsibilities. There were consequences if I
didn't do the things I was supposed to do.

--
Wayne Boatwright

*******************************************
Date: Monday, 08(VIII)/25(XXV)/08(MMVIII)
*******************************************
Countdown till Labor Day

6dys 5hrs 55mins
*******************************************
Never review the troops until you know
whose troops they are.
*******************************************

Message has been deleted

Saerah Gray

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:46:01 PM8/25/08
to
"Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot> fnord
news:Xns9B05763A3411...@69.16.185.250:

> sarah gray <anis...@oohay.com>
news:Xns9B04A6EAAE731anisaerahoohaycom@
> 207.115.17.102: in rec.food.cooking
>
>>
>> I guess I am a Bad Person, because if I had seen that, I would have
>> pointed out to my daughter that that is why I won't buy them for her.
>> the kid was probably ok; head wounds always bleed a lot. (and my kid
>> knows about that; she has a scar from when she was 2 and ran into the
>> corner of a wall)
>
> I know it probably looked worse than it was. I really wanted to go
beat
> the shit out of the parent for being so stupid.
>
>>
>> What exactly is negligent about having loose gravel in a parking lot?
>> Was the parent blind?
>
>
> Not a thing. That was my point. Who knows though. Maybe the parent
> figured they were spending "quality" <snort> time with the kid.
>

Yeah, that was supposed to be a reiteration of your point. I would never
think you would be so stupid as to blame anyone but the parent for what
happened :)

--
Saerah

"Welcome to Usenet, Biatch! Adapt or haul ass!"
- some hillbilly from FL

Saerah Gray

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:46:43 PM8/25/08
to
TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> fnord news:48b2f42c$0$23177
$ec3e...@news.usenetmonster.com:

I think I remember that picture! (or at least one very similar :>)

Saerah Gray

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 9:48:59 PM8/25/08
to
Julia Altshuler <jalts...@comcast.net> fnord
news:GfudnTk1qNqzcy_V...@comcast.com:

Well, to me that sounds standard for a particularly ill-bred obnoxious
pre-pubescent.

--
Saerah (working retail has made me a misanthrope ever since)

Edwin Pawlowski

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 10:55:15 PM8/25/08
to

"Sqwertz" <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in message
news:250808.2031...@sqwertz.com...

> TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote:
>
>> I, like you, was born before the advent of the remote control. I was the
>> remote control until I was 16 years old.
>
> I was the Vertical Hold child until I was 18.
>
> -sw

You had the easy job. I held the tin foil on the rabbit ears and had to
move every time the channel was changed.


Saerah Gray

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Aug 25, 2008, 10:58:11 PM8/25/08
to
"Edwin Pawlowski" <e...@snet.net> fnord
news:hgKsk.18953$cW3....@nlpi064.nbdc.sbc.com:

Oh yeah? well, we didn't even have a TV; my siblings and I had to read
the TV listings and act out the programs from the descriptions.

--
Saerah

Blinky the Shark

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Aug 25, 2008, 11:37:32 PM8/25/08
to
Edwin Pawlowski wrote:

You had channels?


--
Blinky
Killing all posts from Google Groups
The Usenet Improvement Project: http://improve-usenet.org
Need a new news feed? http://blinkynet.net/comp/newfeed.html

Blinky the Shark

unread,
Aug 25, 2008, 11:39:00 PM8/25/08
to
Saerah Gray wrote:

> "Edwin Pawlowski" <e...@snet.net> fnord
> news:hgKsk.18953$cW3....@nlpi064.nbdc.sbc.com:
>
>>
>> "Sqwertz" <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote in message
>> news:250808.2031...@sqwertz.com...
>>> TFM® <hillbi...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>> I, like you, was born before the advent of the remote control. I
>>>> was the remote control until I was 16 years old.
>>>
>>> I was the Vertical Hold child until I was 18.
>>>
>>> -sw
>>
>> You had the easy job. I held the tin foil on the rabbit ears and had
>> to move every time the channel was changed.
>>
>>
>>
>
> Oh yeah? well, we didn't even have a TV; my siblings and I had to read
> the TV listings and act out the programs from the descriptions.

You had newspapers? Our TV skeds came on stone tablets. Thrown at the
front door -- which wasn't all that good for the front door. But you
shoulda seen the arms on the delivery boy.

Ms P

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Aug 26, 2008, 12:13:30 AM8/26/08
to

"Blinky the Shark" <no....@box.invalid> wrote in message
news:pan.2008.08.26....@thurston.blinkynet.net...


When my kids were little we had one channel. Seriously. Your three choices
were, on with sound, on without sound or off. I watched a lot of stuff
without sound.

Ms P

hahabogus

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Aug 26, 2008, 1:24:45 AM8/26/08
to
Saerah Gray <anis...@oohay.com> wrote in
news:Xns9B05DDF258D41...@207.115.17.102:

everyone eats with a raise pinky...don't they? You need to always keep one
finger clean to clean out your ears...

--

The house of the burning beet-Alan

Blinky the Shark

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Aug 26, 2008, 2:45:36 AM8/26/08
to
Ms P wrote:

That Russian comic that was hot here a generation ago, Whastshisname
Smirnoff, used to day (rough quote): American television is so different
than Russian TV. Back home we only have two channels. Channel 1 is KGB
guys doing propaganda 24 hours a day. Channel 2 is a KGB guy saying, "Go
back to Channel 1!"

sf

unread,
Aug 26, 2008, 3:15:00 AM8/26/08
to
On Mon, 25 Aug 2008 06:03:52 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
<waynebo...@cox.net> wrote:

>I don't
>remember seeing bad manners until I left for college. I guess I grew up in
>a very sheltered environment.

I grew up in a rural area and *I* don't remember bad manners either.
The worst thing I remembered is that meals were served "family style",
which is something I still don't like. I don't want extra food on the
table when everyone is seated.


--
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.

Mae West

Goomba

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Aug 26, 2008, 3:20:35 AM8/26/08
to
sf wrote:

> I grew up in a rural area and *I* don't remember bad manners either.
> The worst thing I remembered is that meals were served "family style",
> which is something I still don't like. I don't want extra food on the
> table when everyone is seated.

What if you want more? What if your guests at table want more?

Giusi

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Aug 26, 2008, 3:33:37 AM8/26/08
to
<sf> ha scritto nel messaggio
news:p3b7b4tjr6tf0t8dk...@4ax.com...

> On Mon, 25 Aug 2008 06:03:52 GMT, Wayne Boatwright
> <waynebo...@cox.net> wrote:
>
>>I don't
>>remember seeing bad manners until I left for college. I guess I grew up
>>in
>>a very sheltered environment.
>
> I grew up in a rural area and *I* don't remember bad manners either.
> The worst thing I remembered is that meals were served "family style",
> which is something I still don't like. I don't want extra food on the
> table when everyone is seated.

But your extra may not be someone else's enough! Do you really decide how
much other people will get?


Goomba

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Aug 26, 2008, 4:16:45 AM8/26/08
to
Giusi wrote:
> <sf> ha scritto nel messaggio

>> I grew up in a rural area and *I* don't remember bad manners either.


>> The worst thing I remembered is that meals were served "family style",
>> which is something I still don't like. I don't want extra food on the
>> table when everyone is seated.
>
> But your extra may not be someone else's enough! Do you really decide how
> much other people will get?
>

My sister in law surely does. She makes the barest minimum of food for
family get togethers. She's into "eat to live, NOT live to eat" mindset,
and it is sort of unpleasant to eat at her home. There is never anything
more, and the servings are almost measured out. No one is going to get
fat at her house! LOL. She is the type that eats and immediately gets up
to take the dishes off the table and make dinner "over" whereas my
family liked to linger, perhaps nibble some more. It comes across as
inhospitable and miserly.
My step mother and father once brought some wine over for casual family
dinner and the sister in law pitched a fit refusing to serve it (or let
it in the house) because she doesn't believe in alcohol consumption. Yet
my brother is "allowed" to drink wine out of their house. She's just
very weird about food. Pleasure in something as hedonistic as food is to
be discouraged! Oy.

Giusi

unread,
Aug 26, 2008, 5:41:31 AM8/26/08
to

"Goomba" <Goom...@comcast.net> ha scritto nel messaggio
news:6hhsffF...@mid.individual.net...


> Giusi wrote:
>> <sf> ha scritto nel messaggio
>
>>> I grew up in a rural area and *I* don't remember bad manners either.
>>> The worst thing I remembered is that meals were served "family style",
>>> which is something I still don't like. I don't want extra food on the
>>> table when everyone is seated.
>>
>> But your extra may not be someone else's enough! Do you really decide
>> how much other people will get?
> My sister in law surely does. She makes the barest minimum of food for
> family get togethers.

snippage


It comes across as
> inhospitable and miserly.
> My step mother and father once brought some wine over for casual family
> dinner and the sister in law pitched a fit refusing to serve it (or let it
> in the house) because she doesn't believe in alcohol consumption. Yet my
> brother is "allowed" to drink wine out of their house. She's just very
> weird about food. Pleasure in something as hedonistic as food is to be
> discouraged! Oy.

Believe me, someone like that is not just wierd about food! Does it mot
make you wonder about an adult being "allowed" to do this or that?

I could never take it on myself to know what a 6'-4" guy, who may have been
chopping wood all afternoon, should eat. I also don't know how much of
'this' it may take to make up for the fact that 'this other' was something X
,Y or Z could not or would not eat. When planning portions for clients I
have been stunned at how much some can eat.


Zilbandy

unread,
Aug 26, 2008, 6:12:28 AM8/26/08
to

On Mon, 25 Aug 2008 22:22:49 GMT, "Michael \"Dog3\"" <fo...@good.hot>
wrote:

>> Would that be the picture of me with grease running down to my elbow?
>

>Of course. I just figured your tongue wasn't long enough to reach it ;)

Ok, this deserves a repost of that picture. :)

--
Zilbandy

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