TIDBITS 11/15/09
Benjamin Mark
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Toad
It is said by some that the reasons toads play so vital a role
in folklore throughout all nationalities is due to their resemblance
to miniature human beings. I--of course--beg to differ. In the course
of my years I can safely say I have crossed the paths of many humans
and not once have I ever met one and thought to myself ... by Jove
... that person looks just like a toad. Of course, there is the
possibility that I have much traveling yet to do ... and my education
is not yet complete.
Generally speaking they have always been regarded as venomous as
some are known to exude poison from the glands on their skin. Not
to let such knowledge go to waste ... tradition tells us the during
the Middle Ages bandits were known to force toads into the throats of
their victims. There clearly weren't that many spare bullets floating
around ... but toads were clearly in abundance. I dare say it is from
this practice that stemmed that old expression: I can't talk right now
... I have a frog in my throat. Lest there are some of you who want to
state that a toad is a toad and a frog is a frog ... I am here to tell
you that all toads are frogs ... generically speaking. Look it up.
Toad are also believed to be witches' familiars. Mix a little toad
spittle with the sap of the sow thistle and cross yourself with this
lotion and poof ... you're invisible. In much of Europe toads were
killed for this very reason. Clearly it must have worked ... else why
all the toadnapping. The exception to the rule was Romania where it
was thought that if one were capable of killing a toad ... then one
would have no compunction about murdering one's mother. In those
days--I would assume--toads lived in relative safety ... or mothers in
grave danger.
Wait. There's more. It is also believed that toads have hidden in
their heads precious jewels. Now this little fact alone would endear
me to the critter. Get your hands on this jewel ... set it in a ring
... wear it ... and you will be forewarned against poisonings of any
kind. This--as you surely know--can be quite useful.
And of course ... the best of them all ... the winner of this week's
folklore prize for the ridiculous ... is this: Place a toad's heart in
the left sleeve of a sleeping woman ... and when she awakes she will
confess all her secrets. Ye gads. Is there a soul alive so strong in
spirit that when finding a toad's heart in one's sleeve upon awakening
who wouldn't confess to all their peccadilloes?
As a quick addendum ... I have proof of one bit of lore being
completely false. They who say these things say that if one eats
an egg on Good Friday or on Easter Eve one is certain to find a toad
in it. This is of course a lot of frog manure ... for I have eaten
eggs off and on at one time or another during every day of the year
... and not once have I found a toad in it. Flies in the soup are
another matter entirely and I will leave that for another day.
Which brings us up to the bejeweled Toad-du-Jour. Made by one David
Webb. Of course he calls it a Frog ... but since all toads are frogs
and all that ....
For those of you who are new to this thing called Tidbits...may I
direct you to my home page at http://www.tyler-adam.com where you will
scroll down the left side menu till you get to the area that says
Current Tidbits ... and you will see represented on our pages a Toad
of exceptional attractiveness. Or is it a Frog?
And there ya have it.
That's it for this week folks.
Catch you all next week.
Benjamin Mark
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