The world depends on Lance - we can't cure cancer, poverty or global warming without him

Anton Berlin

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Sep 20, 2010, 12:55:57 PM9/20/10

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He's a modern day Gandhi-Jesus and Martin Luther King riding his bike
to save the world.

Page 119 of the SCA Testiclemony

8 And the faith of all the
9 cancer survivors around the world. So everything I do
10 off of the bike would go away, too. And don't think
11 for a second I don't understand that. It's not about
12 money for me. Everything. It's also about the faith
13 that people have put in me over the years. So all of
14 that would be erased. So I don't need it to say in a
15 contract, you're fired if you test positive. That's
16 not as important as losing the support of hundreds of
17 millions of people.

I'd like to thank god for Lance Armstrong but since there is no god -
is it proper that I thank Lance for Lance Armstrong?

What a delusional fuck this doping cheat is !

Magilla Gorilla

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Sep 20, 2010, 1:19:39 PM9/20/10

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Anton Berlin wrote:

I remember reading that quote when those transcripts first came out.
Well, at least now everyone knows why Lance will never admit it.

He likens himself to a leader of millions of people based on faith,
rather than the truth.

Magilla

BLafferty

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Sep 20, 2010, 1:26:49 PM9/20/10

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Delusional? No. A sociopath? Perhaps.

Magilla Gorilla

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Sep 20, 2010, 1:56:33 PM9/20/10

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BLafferty wrote:

Everyone who believes in Lance is delusional. Lance is just another
frivolous celebrity who thinks he's qualified to be the next governor or
president. Say Arnold, how is that recall election change workin' out for
you in Kalee-FOUR-knee-uh? Your state is of far in debt that if it fell
off the continental shelf and sunk in the Pacific the insurance claim on
the entire state would be less than a loaf of bread once you deduct the
debt and pension plan legacy costs for all the corrupt state workers who
helped steer that fucking thing into an iceberg.

I mean who wudda fucking thought that a guy who spent his entire youth in
the gym lifting weights and injecting steroids wouldn't be qualified to
right that sinking ship?

I say we elect Lance president and then he can cure all Americans of
cancer. He can appoint Bruyneel as the head of the DEA to crack down on
drug cartels.

"I'm sorry you don't believe in miracles."

Magilla

BLafferty

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Sep 20, 2010, 2:33:21 PM9/20/10

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By the standards of the American electorate, Lance would be a successful
politician, unless he is either indicted or has Tour wins stripped from
his record. If Lance is ever elected President, I'll join you in the
bell tower, if I haven't already moved to Western Europe.

Magilla Gorilla

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Sep 20, 2010, 3:37:21 PM9/20/10

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BLafferty wrote:

I think we might be safe because Lance indicated he would run as a Democrat in
Texas on an anti-gun platform. No fucking joke.

Magilla

BLafferty

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Sep 20, 2010, 4:07:49 PM9/20/10

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Without Sheryl to guide him he'll revert to a piece of Republican
trailer trash which should get him elected in Texas.

Anton Berlin

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Sep 21, 2010, 10:00:05 AM9/21/10

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You assholes don't don't dick about Texas politics - even as the most
despicable slime ever - Lance Armstrong isn't corrupt or inept enough
to succeed in Texas politics. God damn it kids - read a newspaper !

Magilla Gorilla

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Sep 22, 2010, 12:08:23 AM9/22/10

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BLafferty wrote:

Lance would be shunned as a Republican. He already said on a TV show that he
beleiees in gun control. Evidently, Lance never heard of the NRA.

Magilla

BLafferty

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Sep 22, 2010, 7:19:47 AM9/22/10

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The NRA will make a nice contribution to LAF and pay Lance to replace
Charlton Heston. Money speaks to the Uniballer.

Magilla Gorilla

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Sep 22, 2010, 12:13:07 PM9/22/10

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BLafferty wrote:

I can see the slogan already: Guns don't cause cancer. But they do get rid of it.

Magilla