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How would Britney, Madonna, Christina do on "Fame"?

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James

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May 28, 2003, 9:57:22 PM5/28/03
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Okay all you aspiring stars. If you work hard, put your heart and soul
into your craft, someday you just might, *just might* get to stand by
with all the other truly gifted performers and watch while they put
yet another mediocrity like Madonna in the next broadway show set to
film. In a real Broadway production, she would be mostly qualified to
park cars on opening night.

Watching these folks beat their brains out to be all shiny and
exuberant on this "Fame" show, I can't help but compare them to the
superbly lifeless vocal chops Christina Aguilera inflicted on the
world on SNL a couple of weeks ago. Hey, but at least she was loud.
Her howling was only slightly less musical than the bassett hound down
the street. Hey, but she MUST be talented, 'cause her hair is
eternally bleached and she has rivets in her face, see that's how you
can tell.

Yeah, Britney Spears won on Star Search as a cutesy 12-year-old or
something. Let's see how she stacks up to real, adult singers. Has
Britney EVER put out an a capella cut, where you can actually hear her
unprocessed voice without being buried under 64 processed tracks?

How is it with so many genuinely talented peformers out there, so many
2nd and 3rd raters get groomed to be stars? Fer cryin' out loud, are
Josh Groban and Andrea Bocelli the best young "opera singers" they can
come up with? At least with these reality t.v. talent shows, they're
forced to pick someone with some modicum of talent.

Phil from Chicago

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May 28, 2003, 11:31:23 PM5/28/03
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Britney can dance and she's got some looks but singing wise she needs some help
and she can't act worth a s**t. Madonna can't act worth a s**t either and
Christina is fine but she's gotta stop looking like a zombie whore from a
Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie


Phil is RAT's Pro Wrestling Ambassador

I support President Bush, I support our troops.....death to Saddam, Osama and
Terrorism long live freedom!

CMK1996

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May 29, 2003, 12:51:16 AM5/29/03
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>Yeah, Britney Spears won on Star Search as a cutesy 12-year-old or
>something.

Actually she lost. She probably won some of the semi-final rounds, but she lost
the top prize. They use this over and over as an example of irony. Ugh.

Jonathan Allen

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May 29, 2003, 5:52:28 AM5/29/03
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> Britney can dance and she's got some looks but singing wise she needs some
help
> and she can't act worth a s**t. Madonna can't act worth a s**t either and
> Christina is fine but she's gotta stop looking like a zombie whore from a
> Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie

Then what about Mandy Moore, huh??

At least Madonna stunk like a forgotten tuna sandwich that's been wrapped in
foil since 1979 in Swept Away. I've never seen the damn film myself, anyway!

Jonathan Allen


Jorabi

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May 29, 2003, 9:55:01 AM5/29/03
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I was thinking the same thing as I watched Fame. The standard for
these talent shows is much higher than the actual "stars" that are
making millions. People like Britney and Justin Timberlake can't
sing worth a damn and would be eliminated in the early rounds.

Maybe they're only successful due to good promotion and marketing,
or because they have the "it" that young fans go for.


Joe

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May 29, 2003, 2:32:37 PM5/29/03
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"Jorabi" <jor...@pobox.com> wrote in <VioBa.55165$e11.43380
@twister.nyroc.rr.com>:

>I was thinking the same thing as I watched Fame. The standard for
>these talent shows is much higher than the actual "stars" that are
>making millions. People like Britney and Justin Timberlake can't
>sing worth a damn and would be eliminated in the early rounds.

Actually, Timberlake sounds very good when you strip away the
production. Spears I've never heard (and probably won't for good reason),
but at least some of the people who are stars do have talent...

>Maybe they're only successful due to good promotion and marketing,
>or because they have the "it" that young fans go for.

That's really it. It's more about the marketing and the money than it
is about the talent.

-- Joe

James

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May 29, 2003, 4:00:59 PM5/29/03
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"Jorabi" <jor...@pobox.com> wrote in message news:<VioBa.55165$e11....@twister.nyroc.rr.com>...

>
> Maybe they're only successful due to good promotion and marketing,
> or because they have the "it" that young fans go for.

Yeah, but jeezus, why not put all that marketing and promotion behind
somebody who actually has talent. There are boatloads of young girls
who have the WHOLE package - looks AND real vocal chops. Ditto lots of
young guys who sing well.

One notable exception has been LeeAnn Rimes. She has an incredible
voice and looks too. Of course, she's a crossover from the country
world. I'd say as a whole, the girls from country music world pretty
uniformly have it together vocally. Shania, LeeAnn Womack, Martina
McBride, Faith Hill, Sara Evans, etc. The guys seem to be often more
about "persona" than vocal chops, (can't stand to listen to Toby
Keith) but there are a number who are fine singers.

Cliff Hartle

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May 29, 2003, 8:03:42 PM5/29/03
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Actually Madonna tried out for a part in the movie Fame and didn't make it.

See http://us.imdb.com/Trivia?0080716

"James" <muzic...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:4e5a357c.03052...@posting.google.com...

Jorabi

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May 29, 2003, 8:37:42 PM5/29/03
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"Joe" wrote ...
>
> "Jorabi" wrote ...

>
> >I was thinking the same thing as I watched Fame. The standard for
> >these talent shows is much higher than the actual "stars" that are
> >making millions. People like Britney and Justin Timberlake can't
> >sing worth a damn and would be eliminated in the early rounds.
>
> Actually, Timberlake sounds very good when you strip away the
> production.

Everything I've heard him do live has been terrible. He did
sound pretty good when Nsync started, before his voice changed,
but I took my nieces to see the band last year and he was weak.
Same as a solo act.

Evil

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May 30, 2003, 11:28:48 AM5/30/03
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"Jorabi" <jor...@pobox.com> wrote in message news:<VioBa.55165$e11....@twister.nyroc.rr.com>...

Wow. CELEBRITY AMERICAN IDOL would be awesome.

Could you imagine Britney, Christina, Mandy, and Avril screetching in
front of SImon?

Evil

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May 30, 2003, 11:32:27 AM5/30/03
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cmk...@aol.com (CMK1996) wrote in message news:<20030529005116...@mb-m16.aol.com>...

Did you hear the HOWARD STERN where the guy sings the song from SPIDER
MAN for the the AMericna Idol judges. Simon bashes him and says how
the guy "will never ever be paid to sing". Howard then reveals that
it is Chad Kroeger, the lead singer of Nickelback. Simon then goes on
to say, "Well that goes to show you that we know nothing..."

Jason Wuthrich

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May 30, 2003, 6:12:50 PM5/30/03
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> Did you hear the HOWARD STERN where the guy sings the song from
> SPIDER MAN for the the AMericna Idol judges. Simon bashes him
> and says how the guy "will never ever be paid to sing". Howard then
> reveals that it is Chad Kroeger, the lead singer of Nickelback. Simon
> then goes on to say, "Well that goes to show you that we know nothing..."

How does the expression go, "Fool me once..."? When Katie Couric
guest-hosted "The Tonight Show", Simon told this one girl "you have no
future is this business". Simon, meet Kelly Rowland of Destiny's Child.


Evil

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May 30, 2003, 11:33:37 PM5/30/03
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"Jason Wuthrich" <tjwut...@chartermi.net_spam.trap.please.remove> wrote in message news:<vdflrb5...@corp.supernews.com>...

yeah, except the difference was that Chad Kroeger on Stern sang it
straight while Kelly Rowland (formerly of DC) intentionally sang the
song poorly. OF COURSE Simon is going to say she sucked when she
tanks the performance on purpose. It would have been more interesting
if she HAD sang it straight out. Of course, how HAVE her solo album
sales been lately???

The One

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May 31, 2003, 6:27:08 PM5/31/03
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"Jason Wuthrich" <tjwut...@chartermi.net_spam.trap.please.remove> wrote in
message news:vdflrb5...@corp.supernews.com...

I thought he knew it was Kelly Rowland and that she was singing badly on
purpose. He seemed to be laughing while criticizing her because he knew it
was a set-up.

Regina

--
Remove the "nospam" from my e-mail to e-mail me
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker,
And I have seen the eternal Footman hold my coat, and snicker,
And in short, I was afraid."

--T.S. Eliot
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sniggler wept oceans

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May 31, 2003, 9:11:25 PM5/31/03
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"James" <muzic...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:4e5a357c.03052...@posting.google.com...

> At least with these reality t.v. talent shows, they're


> forced to pick someone with some modicum of talent.


aaaaaaaah reality TV!
the dirge of the 21st century

the ultimate manufactured product


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