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'Models Inc.' to 'The Swan': FOX's 25 worst shows of the past 25 years
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Ubiquitous
Apr 24, 2012, 4:21:04 PM4/24/12
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'Second Chance'/'Boys Will Be Boys' (1987-88)
This show from the first year of FOX's existence is now known for two
things: featuring Matthew Perry as the younger version of a man (Kiel
Martin) who, after dying and being denied entry into heaven, is given an
opportunity to watch over his teenage self and steer him in the right
direction, and for kinda-sorta predicting Moammar Gadhafi's death. It was
not known for being any good, either in its original form or as the
retitled "Boys Will Be Boys," which dumped the original premise and
focused on Perry and his buddies.
'Top of the Heap'/'Vinnie & Bobby' (1991-92)
"Top of the Heap" was a sitcom spun off from "Married ... With Children"
that starred Joseph Bologna and Matt LeBlanc as a father and son enamored
of get-rich-quick schemes (it also, incidentally, featured Joey Lauren
Adams pre-"Dazed and Confused"). It failed after only seven episodes --
yet for some reason FOX decided to bring back LeBlanc's character,
Vinnie, in a buddy comedy the following season. "Vinnie & Bobby" also
died after seven episodes.
'The Chevy Chase Show' (1993)
One of the worst hype-to-return ratios in modern TV history belongs to
this ill-conceived, poorly received late-night venture that lasted for
only five weeks in the fall of 1993. Cover-your-eyes bad.
'Models Inc.' (1994-95)
This second-generation spinoff (of "Melrose Place," itself a spinoff of
"Beverly Hills, 90210") did feature a pre-"Matrix" Carrie-Anne Moss, but
that's really all we can remember about it.
'Too Something' (1995-96)
One of dozens of "young people hanging out" sitcoms spawned in the wake
of "Friends," "Too Something" starred Eric Schaeffer and Donal Lardner
Ward as guys with dead-end jobs and dreams of doing something artistic.
It was yanked after a few weeks in the fall of 1995 and returned briefly
in the summer of '96 with a new name ("New York Daze") -- the product of
a network contest to give it a different title. No one watched the
retitled show either.
'Pauly' (1997)
Someone at FOX apparently decided that in 1997 -- after "Jury Duty" and
"Bio-Dome" -- that it was a good idea to give Pauly Shore his own sitcom.
The viewers thought differently.
'Holding the Baby' (1998)
This adaptation of a British comedy featured Jennifer Westfeldt, Eddie
McClintock and Sherri Shepherd, all of whom have gone on to much better
things.
'Time of Your Life' (1999-2000)
FOX spun off Jennifer Love Hewitt's character from "Party of Five" and
promoted the heck out of Sarah's move to New York. Despite that, and a
cast that also featured future TV stars Jennifer Garner and Pauley
Perrette, "Time" flopped badly and was gone after one incomplete season.
'Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?' (2000)
Aside from being an affront to feminism, good taste, and the notion that
love should be a part of marriage, this one-off special at the dawn of
the reality TV era hit several other lows: Groom Rick Rockwell wasn't
even a mono-millionaire, let alone a multi-millionaire. There was also
the domestic-violence allegation against him that somehow didn't come up
in the background check. Bride Darva Conger would later say she and
Rockwell never consummated their marriage, which was annulled. She went
on to pose for Playboy.
'girls club' (2002)
David E. Kelley followed up the departed "Ally McBeal" with this show
about young female lawyers. Stars Chyler Leigh, Gretchen Mol and Kathleen
Robertson deserved far better than this limp drama with the silly
lower-case title. It was gone after just two weeks.
'Married by America' (2003)
Five single people allowed the viewing public to pick their future
spouses for them, then had their relationships judged by "experts" who
booted one couple each week until the final two could decide on their own
whether they wanted to get hitched. Shocking exactly zero people, neither
couple chose to stay together.
'Mr. Personality' (2003)
A riff on "The Bachelorette" where the men wore masks and had to woo the
woman using only their personalities may have sounded fun on paper, but
it was unbearably creepy on the air. Host Monica Lewinsky, however, came
off surprisingly well.
'Paradise Hotel' (2003)
A variation on the more fun "Temptation Island," "Paradise Hotel" brought
people to a luxury resort, invited them to pair off and then gang up on
the guests they didn't like. Drama was intended but never really
achieved, and FOX opted not to do a second season, although MyNetwork TV
and the Fox Reality Channel revived the show for a second season in 2008.
'The Next Joe Millionaire: An International Affair' (2003)
Boy, 2003 was a banner year for reality shows on FOX, huh? After the
runaway success of the first "Joe Millionaire" -- close to 40 million
people watched the finale -- FOX hastily ordered a second season. The
only problem was that since everybody in America knew the gag, the
network had to recruit a bunch of European women to be romanced by fake
rich guy David Smith. The second go-round was as big a flop as the first
one was a hit.
'Skin' (2003)
HIS FATHER IS THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY!
'The Simple Life' (2003-05)
We've since forgiven Nicole Richie and put Paris Hilton out of our minds.
We're still a little mad at FOX. (After FOX canceled the show in 2005, E!
picked it up and produced two more seasons.)
'The Littlest Groom' (2004)
FOX's alternative programming division really had it out for "The
Bachelor" in 2003 and '04, throwing up several dating shows with
different hooks. The little people featured on this two-week special
managed to keep their dignity intact, despite the silly framework the
network put around them.
'The Swan' (2004)
FOX took the plastic-surgery concept of ABC's "Extreme Makeover" and
turned it into a pageant competition among women who radically changed
their appearances, managing to offend lots and lots of people in the
process. Somehow it earned a second season, but its ratings tanked and we
were spared further horrors.
'Forever Eden' (2004)
"Forever" turned out to be about a month and a half in this show's case.
As far as we know, though, the contestants sent to a tropical resort for
the show -- whose hook was that it could go on indefinitely -- are still
there.
'The Next Great Champ' (2004)
FOX rushed this copycat boxing competition series, fronted by Oscar de la
Hoya, onto the air in the fall of 2004 to get ahead of NBC's similar show
"The Contender" (which was announced first but didn't debut until early
'05). Neither series managed any kind of decent ratings, so maybe "Next
Great Champ" did its job. It was KO'd in the ratings, though, lasting
only a couple episodes before being shipped to Fox Sports Net to play out
the string.
'The Princes of Malibu' (2005)
Although it lasted only two episodes, "The Princes of Malibu" was the
first show to put Brody Jenner and Spencer Pratt [WHAT!?!?} on
television. So obviously it's on this list.
'Head Cases' (2005)
A buddy dramedy about two lawyers (Chris O'Donnell and Adam Goldberg)
who've just been released from a mental institution and decide to open
their own practice? What could possibly go wrong? Oh, right.
'Stacked' (2005-06)
Premise: Pamela Anderson works in a bookstore. Humor: Not so much.
"Modern Family" co-creator Steven Levitan would probably prefer you not
remember this brief part of his career.
''Til Death' (2006-10)
Thanks to extraordinary efforts by producing studio Sony, this critically
ripped and viewer-ignored sitcom (it never averaged more than 7.1 million
viewers) managed to stay on the air for 81 episodes, just enough for Sony
to get it a syndication deal. Fun fact: the character of Eddie (Brad
Garrett) and Joy's (Joely Fisher) daughter was played by four different
actresses: Krysten Ritter, Laura Clery, Lindsey Broad (pictured here) and
Kate Micucci
'Vanished' (2006)
Neither abduction drama that debuted in the fall of 2006 (NBC's
"Kidnapped" was the other) lasted a full season, but only "Vanished"
managed to alienate a significant segment of its audience by killing Gale
Harold's character six episodes in.
--
"If I Wanted America to Fail"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZ-4gnNz0vc&feature=youtube_gdata_player
This show from the first year of FOX's existence is now known for two
things: featuring Matthew Perry as the younger version of a man (Kiel
Martin) who, after dying and being denied entry into heaven, is given an
opportunity to watch over his teenage self and steer him in the right
direction, and for kinda-sorta predicting Moammar Gadhafi's death. It was
not known for being any good, either in its original form or as the
retitled "Boys Will Be Boys," which dumped the original premise and
focused on Perry and his buddies.
'Top of the Heap'/'Vinnie & Bobby' (1991-92)
"Top of the Heap" was a sitcom spun off from "Married ... With Children"
that starred Joseph Bologna and Matt LeBlanc as a father and son enamored
of get-rich-quick schemes (it also, incidentally, featured Joey Lauren
Adams pre-"Dazed and Confused"). It failed after only seven episodes --
yet for some reason FOX decided to bring back LeBlanc's character,
Vinnie, in a buddy comedy the following season. "Vinnie & Bobby" also
died after seven episodes.
'The Chevy Chase Show' (1993)
One of the worst hype-to-return ratios in modern TV history belongs to
this ill-conceived, poorly received late-night venture that lasted for
only five weeks in the fall of 1993. Cover-your-eyes bad.
'Models Inc.' (1994-95)
This second-generation spinoff (of "Melrose Place," itself a spinoff of
"Beverly Hills, 90210") did feature a pre-"Matrix" Carrie-Anne Moss, but
that's really all we can remember about it.
'Too Something' (1995-96)
One of dozens of "young people hanging out" sitcoms spawned in the wake
of "Friends," "Too Something" starred Eric Schaeffer and Donal Lardner
Ward as guys with dead-end jobs and dreams of doing something artistic.
It was yanked after a few weeks in the fall of 1995 and returned briefly
in the summer of '96 with a new name ("New York Daze") -- the product of
a network contest to give it a different title. No one watched the
retitled show either.
'Pauly' (1997)
Someone at FOX apparently decided that in 1997 -- after "Jury Duty" and
"Bio-Dome" -- that it was a good idea to give Pauly Shore his own sitcom.
The viewers thought differently.
'Holding the Baby' (1998)
This adaptation of a British comedy featured Jennifer Westfeldt, Eddie
McClintock and Sherri Shepherd, all of whom have gone on to much better
things.
'Time of Your Life' (1999-2000)
FOX spun off Jennifer Love Hewitt's character from "Party of Five" and
promoted the heck out of Sarah's move to New York. Despite that, and a
cast that also featured future TV stars Jennifer Garner and Pauley
Perrette, "Time" flopped badly and was gone after one incomplete season.
'Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?' (2000)
Aside from being an affront to feminism, good taste, and the notion that
love should be a part of marriage, this one-off special at the dawn of
the reality TV era hit several other lows: Groom Rick Rockwell wasn't
even a mono-millionaire, let alone a multi-millionaire. There was also
the domestic-violence allegation against him that somehow didn't come up
in the background check. Bride Darva Conger would later say she and
Rockwell never consummated their marriage, which was annulled. She went
on to pose for Playboy.
'girls club' (2002)
David E. Kelley followed up the departed "Ally McBeal" with this show
about young female lawyers. Stars Chyler Leigh, Gretchen Mol and Kathleen
Robertson deserved far better than this limp drama with the silly
lower-case title. It was gone after just two weeks.
'Married by America' (2003)
Five single people allowed the viewing public to pick their future
spouses for them, then had their relationships judged by "experts" who
booted one couple each week until the final two could decide on their own
whether they wanted to get hitched. Shocking exactly zero people, neither
couple chose to stay together.
'Mr. Personality' (2003)
A riff on "The Bachelorette" where the men wore masks and had to woo the
woman using only their personalities may have sounded fun on paper, but
it was unbearably creepy on the air. Host Monica Lewinsky, however, came
off surprisingly well.
'Paradise Hotel' (2003)
A variation on the more fun "Temptation Island," "Paradise Hotel" brought
people to a luxury resort, invited them to pair off and then gang up on
the guests they didn't like. Drama was intended but never really
achieved, and FOX opted not to do a second season, although MyNetwork TV
and the Fox Reality Channel revived the show for a second season in 2008.
'The Next Joe Millionaire: An International Affair' (2003)
Boy, 2003 was a banner year for reality shows on FOX, huh? After the
runaway success of the first "Joe Millionaire" -- close to 40 million
people watched the finale -- FOX hastily ordered a second season. The
only problem was that since everybody in America knew the gag, the
network had to recruit a bunch of European women to be romanced by fake
rich guy David Smith. The second go-round was as big a flop as the first
one was a hit.
'Skin' (2003)
HIS FATHER IS THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY!
'The Simple Life' (2003-05)
We've since forgiven Nicole Richie and put Paris Hilton out of our minds.
We're still a little mad at FOX. (After FOX canceled the show in 2005, E!
picked it up and produced two more seasons.)
'The Littlest Groom' (2004)
FOX's alternative programming division really had it out for "The
Bachelor" in 2003 and '04, throwing up several dating shows with
different hooks. The little people featured on this two-week special
managed to keep their dignity intact, despite the silly framework the
network put around them.
'The Swan' (2004)
FOX took the plastic-surgery concept of ABC's "Extreme Makeover" and
turned it into a pageant competition among women who radically changed
their appearances, managing to offend lots and lots of people in the
process. Somehow it earned a second season, but its ratings tanked and we
were spared further horrors.
'Forever Eden' (2004)
"Forever" turned out to be about a month and a half in this show's case.
As far as we know, though, the contestants sent to a tropical resort for
the show -- whose hook was that it could go on indefinitely -- are still
there.
'The Next Great Champ' (2004)
FOX rushed this copycat boxing competition series, fronted by Oscar de la
Hoya, onto the air in the fall of 2004 to get ahead of NBC's similar show
"The Contender" (which was announced first but didn't debut until early
'05). Neither series managed any kind of decent ratings, so maybe "Next
Great Champ" did its job. It was KO'd in the ratings, though, lasting
only a couple episodes before being shipped to Fox Sports Net to play out
the string.
'The Princes of Malibu' (2005)
Although it lasted only two episodes, "The Princes of Malibu" was the
first show to put Brody Jenner and Spencer Pratt [WHAT!?!?} on
television. So obviously it's on this list.
'Head Cases' (2005)
A buddy dramedy about two lawyers (Chris O'Donnell and Adam Goldberg)
who've just been released from a mental institution and decide to open
their own practice? What could possibly go wrong? Oh, right.
'Stacked' (2005-06)
Premise: Pamela Anderson works in a bookstore. Humor: Not so much.
"Modern Family" co-creator Steven Levitan would probably prefer you not
remember this brief part of his career.
''Til Death' (2006-10)
Thanks to extraordinary efforts by producing studio Sony, this critically
ripped and viewer-ignored sitcom (it never averaged more than 7.1 million
viewers) managed to stay on the air for 81 episodes, just enough for Sony
to get it a syndication deal. Fun fact: the character of Eddie (Brad
Garrett) and Joy's (Joely Fisher) daughter was played by four different
actresses: Krysten Ritter, Laura Clery, Lindsey Broad (pictured here) and
Kate Micucci
'Vanished' (2006)
Neither abduction drama that debuted in the fall of 2006 (NBC's
"Kidnapped" was the other) lasted a full season, but only "Vanished"
managed to alienate a significant segment of its audience by killing Gale
Harold's character six episodes in.
--
"If I Wanted America to Fail"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZ-4gnNz0vc&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Ian J. Ball
Apr 25, 2012, 8:58:14 AM4/25/12
to
Whichever website you pulled this off of, the author is an idiot who
doesn't know what he's talking about. :/
--
"We're gonna need a lot of therapy." - the character Rachel in "Bunnyman"
(named 1 of the 5 Worst Horror Films of 2011 by 28DaysLaterAnalysis.com!!)
doesn't know what he's talking about. :/
--
"We're gonna need a lot of therapy." - the character Rachel in "Bunnyman"
(named 1 of the 5 Worst Horror Films of 2011 by 28DaysLaterAnalysis.com!!)
Obveeus
Apr 25, 2012, 9:09:00 AM4/25/12
to
"Ian J. Ball" <ijball-...@mac.invalid> wrote:
> Whichever website you pulled this off of, the author is an idiot who
> doesn't know what he's talking about. :/
saying that any of those don't deserve to be on the list of worst shows
ever? The only glaring mistake the list includes is 'TIL DEATH. That show
wasn't something I enjoyed at all and was something that only survived
because of very special treatment by the network/studio (like another
clunker: Rules of Engagement), but it still has no business being on a
worst ever list.
Ian J. Ball
Apr 25, 2012, 9:18:40 AM4/25/12
to
On Apr 25, 6:09 am, "Obveeus" <Obve...@aol.com> wrote:
There are several glaring mistakes. The most obvious is including
"Paradise Hotel", which is literally the only good reality show FOX
ever put out.
The fact that this author included PH shows they don't know what
they're talking about.
They also include "Models Inc." (after basically admitting they never
watched it) even though "Models" was actually highly enjoyable through
its first 8-10 episodes (the last 10 episodes are another
matter... :/ ).
"Paradise Hotel", which is literally the only good reality show FOX
ever put out.
The fact that this author included PH shows they don't know what
they're talking about.
They also include "Models Inc." (after basically admitting they never
watched it) even though "Models" was actually highly enjoyable through
its first 8-10 episodes (the last 10 episodes are another
matter... :/ ).
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