AMC update Monday, Dec. 21 1992
Mary E. Allison
Just when you thought it was save to read the updates again --
SHE'S BAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKKKKK (for a day anyway)
UPDATE for MONDAY, DECEMBER 21, 1992
{ my cynical (or insightful) comments are in brackets }
OUR TOP STORIES TODAY
* OH NAT - would you like some cheese with that whine?
(Nat, Trevor, Lucas, and the Pine Valley Elves/police)
* Don't take my baby
(Dixie and the vultures -- I mean LAWYERS)
* Let ME help { GAK }
(Taylor and Derek)
* A Christmas miracle
(Mrs. Orsini and Dimitri)
* You're not a stranger
(Jr. and Tadski)
* You got a ride in a WHAT!!!!!
(Dixie, Brian, Jr. and Adam)
* OH NAT - would you like some cheese with that whine
Nat and Trevor are visiting their wonderful new house that Lucas
Barnes JUST finished. Trevor calls the moving company and they CAN'T
move them in before Christmas. Nat WANTS to be in her HOUSE by
Christmas. Trevor says they can have Christmas at the Penthouse but
Nat won't have it. Trevor figures that telling her that Christmas is
wherever they are won't work.
Lucas Barnes enters and tells Nat and Trevor a story. One time
his mother wanted a new stove for Christmas so his father called his
uncles and they delivered the stove at midnight on Christmas eve. Nat
asks Lucas where his uncles are now.
Trevor calls "elf central" (Pine Valley Police Station) and
arranges for volunteer help. { Like these guys don't have their own
preparations to make - like buying and wrapping gifts for their
families }
* Don't take my baby
Dixie gives her testimony in the child custody hearing. First
Livia starts off asking her questions. She starts out asking about
the summer and Dixie mentions that she only went "out" at night, after
Junior was already in bed and the time that she went on "vacation" was
the time that Junior would normally be staying at his dad's for a few
weeks anyway. She called him every day and he knew that she loved
him. She didn't tell him that anything was bothering her and she
tried to protect him. Livia then asked about his "schedule", does he
have certain things he can count on and Dixie mentioned Sunday morning
waffles and how Jr. likes his with lots of strawberries and on and on.
Livia and Dixie were trying to make her out to be the "perfect"
mother. { Did anyone else get the impression that the judge seemed
incredibly BORED during the testimony? } The last question Livia
asked was if Dixie had Jr's schedule written down somewhere, and she
said yes, she writes it down so his FATHER will know.
During the recess (between Livia's questions and Leslie's) An Li
comes in and tells Dixie that JR IS MISSING. The police are looking
for him. SUPER BRIAN runs out saying that he'll find him. Adam and
Barracuda figure out that something is wrong, but they don't know
what.
Before Dixie is to be cross examined, Jack asks for a recess. He
thinks that, with Dixie knowing Jr. is missing she'll have a hard time
answering the questions. Ms. Dupree tries to make it look like if
Dixie can't even answer some questions how good of a mother could she
be. Anyway, Dixie is cross examined by the Barracuda. { I HOPE this
character stays around - she's a real bitch. I like that in a woman. }
Anyway, she asks Dixie all sorts of real leading questions. Where you
THINKING about your SON when you were taking STRANGE MEN to your
brother's apartment. You wanted to have SEX with STRANGE MEN inches
away from the BLOOD stains from your brother's murder. Haley leaves
the courtroom during the questioning and Charlie follows her. Haley
tells Charlie that seeing Leslie going after Dixie upsets her but
Charlie tells Haley that she's finally seen what's going on and she's
picked Dixie's side. { I also predict that Haley will eventually give
testimony against Adam } Dixie is not looking too good and then she
starts crying on the stand PLEASE don't take away my baby.
* Let ME help (GAK)
At Dixie's, Terrance and An Li discover Jr. missing. They jump
into action. Terrance calls the police station and An Li runs to the
courthouse to tell Dixie.
At the police station, Mimi and Derek are giving each other the
cold shoulder. Terrance calls in to say that Jr. is missing. Mimi
leaves to find Jr. and dear sweet Taylor wants to know if there's
ANYTHING she can do to help { hmmmm - she should do one of those
artificial sweetener commercials }. Mimi returns with Jr. and after
the happy ending with the Jr. found story Trevor calls looking for
moving elfs. Mimi leaves (still giving Derek the cold shoulder) and
goes off the help Trevor. Derek is about to leave and Taylor asks him
for "help studying" { bat eyes }. Derek says okay { HEY DUDE -- your
friend Trevor is looking for HELP }. Derek and Taylor are alone at
his place and she's asking him cop type questions. She can see that
something's distracting him and begs him to let her help { bat eyes
some more } after all, even though she's young she knows what it's
like to hurt. { GAG ME WITH A SPOON } { You know, I think in the REAL
NEAR FUTURE these scenes with Taylor and Derek are going to become ff
scenes }
* A Christmas miracle
As Ted is out for a drive, Mrs. Orsini tells Dimitri a story of a
Christmas miracle that happened two years ago.
When Ted was 8 his mother gave him a bike for a present. Ted, of
course, INSISTED on riding his bike to school alone. Mom decided to
let him ride the bike home even though she REALLY wanted to pick him
up from school. He never came home that day { :-( }. Shortly after
that Mr. Orsini died and Mrs. Orsini started having trouble with the
winery. 20 years later, as the winery was on it's last leg back came
Ted. It was a Christmas time two years ago. She took him into the
business and he saved the day. { All together now, 1 ... 2 ... 3 ...
awwwwwwwww }.
* You're not a stranger
Jr. is sitting in the park crying. A { very handsome } man comes
up to him and starts talking to him. Ted asks Jr. what's wrong and if
he can help. Jr. says he wants his mommy. Ted asks Jr. what mommy's
name is and Jr. says mommy. Ted ask Jr. if he knows where mommy is
and Jr. says that his mommy is with a judge. { I really can't
describe this scene but it was sooooo sweet. It's like the old Ted is
back when he's with the kid. } Ted offers to help Jr. find mommy and
tells Jr. that he's new in town but he can probably find out where the
judge is { just go up to the red brick building that says "courthouse"
probably most of the buildings in town are red brick. } Ted says that
even though it's not good for a guy like Jr. to talk to strangers that
it's okay for him to talk to Ted. Jr. says Ted's not a stranger. Ted
tells Jr. that he probably looks like someone that use to babysit for
Jr. { How many picture of Tad has Jr. seen lately?? } Mimi comes
along and asks Ted a few questions about why he was talking to Jr.
Sort of like watch yourself around this kid. Ted tells Mimi that his
name is Ted Orsini and he's staying at Wildwind. Mimi says "nice
place" in a VERY sarcastic tone and Ted says "if you like museums.
* You got a ride in a WHAT!!!!! (or coverup -- NOT)
After Dixie's testimony is over she leaves the courtroom and
outside she runs into Jr. She gives him a big hug and he apologizes
for doing something bad. Adam is listening and Brian tries to tell
Jr. that he doesn't need to apologize. Jr. then mentions that he got
to ride in the police car. This, of course, grabs Adam's attention
(WHAT!) so it's not too long before Adam will find out what happened
{ see kindly judge your honour - my wife can't even leave my son with
responsible people } { of course dear Adam will never realize that if
he wasn't such a PONDSCUM things like this wouldn't happen }.
UNANSWERED QUESTIONS for December 21, 1992
Some of you may not remember this, but back in May I actually STARTED
the unanswered questions list that Dave has continued using every
week. Since I've had a code in the dose, I'm to tired to think of new
questions so I'll use some of the old ones.
The FIRST question - which according to Lance was answered before it
was asked but which I would STILL like to see answered on the show
(some of these are my questions, some are from other folks)
1) Is Enchantment Cosmetics cruelty-free, or do they test their
cosmetics on animals?
2) Do PEOPLE ever stay at the Valley Inn, it seems like there's always
a room or a suite or 10 available at the drop of a hat?
3) How was Bobby's ski trip?
4) I think I would like to know how Courtland Electronics makes such a
grand profit in these troubled times. What is their product line,
anyway?
5) Do they have call-waiting in Pine Valley?
6) Does no one commute one hour out to work and one hour back, thus
ruining any chance for those frequent pop-overs to the homes of
friends and families during the day?
7) Is the locksmith unemployed in Pine Valley, given that no one locks
their doors?
8) Are Pine Valley closets particularly big, since no woman wears the
same outfit twice? (And where do all those dresses end up; are
they clogging the sewer system?)
9) What's the mascot for Pine Valley High; are they the Fighting Pine Cones?
10) How long can Jackson live at the Valley Inn, I realize he must
make some pretty good money but it is foolish for him to give it
all to the Valley Inn.
11) Why doesn't anyone ever hire a REAL housekeeper instead of their
mother-in-laws?
12) Homcumisit that Janet gets a phone in her hospital room? Who is
paying for it? Why isn't it bugged? Why did she get a private
phone even when she was still in prison?
{ Hey - if JaNut has a phone, why doesn't Haley's mom? - ma }
13) Which airline can get me to Vienna in 20 minutes?
{ Or Hungary or ... }
--
Peace on earth!!!! Gimme present!!!!
-- Animal
Mary Allison (ma...@uicsl.csl.uiuc.edu) Urbana, Illinois
Dave Ochs
> Nat and Trevor are visiting their wonderful new house that Lucas
>Barnes JUST finished. Trevor calls the moving company and they CAN'T
>move them in before Christmas. Nat WANTS to be in her HOUSE by
>Christmas. Trevor says they can have Christmas at the Penthouse but
>Nat won't have it. Trevor figures that telling her that Christmas is
>wherever they are won't work.
I also thought it was pretty whiney of Nat to INSIST on being in the new
house [and didn't it get repaired fast, although I don't think it looks
authentically Victorian any more at all]. I think we are supposed to be
touched at how everyone pitches in to help Trev and Nat ... he will
probably surprise her by taking her out for a drive on Chrismas Eve and
end up at the house (everyone now ... awwwwwww).
>mother. { Did anyone else get the impression that the judge seemed
>incredibly BORED during the testimony? } The last question Livia
I mentioned to my BH that it looked like the judge was going to fall
asleep at the bench ... he didn't look too impressed by all of the
"family values" testimony.
>like to hurt. { GAG ME WITH A SPOON } { You know, I think in the REAL
>NEAR FUTURE these scenes with Taylor and Derek are going to become ff
>scenes }
What are you talking about? I don't remember seeing any scenes with
Taylor and Derek :-)
>Jr. that he doesn't need to apologize. Jr. then mentions that he got
>to ride in the police car. This, of course, grabs Adam's attention
>(WHAT!) so it's not too long before Adam will find out what happened
>{ see kindly judge your honour - my wife can't even leave my son with
>responsible people } { of course dear Adam will never realize that if
>he wasn't such a PONDSCUM things like this wouldn't happen }.
I don't even know if I can stand to watch Adam's reaction to all this.
He will go into his psycho mode like he did when he found out Jr was
in the hospital without him knowing. I find him really insufferably
obnoxious when he acts like that.
>3) How was Bobby's ski trip?
Ruth and Joy just got a note from Bobby last week ... "Dear Mom and Dad,
The skiing is great. Think I'll stay a few weeks more. Bobby."
>4) I think I would like to know how Courtland Electronics makes such a
> grand profit in these troubled times. What is their product line,
> anyway?
Dancing beer cans and those keychains that make death-ray and tommy gun
sounds.
>6) Does no one commute one hour out to work and one hour back, thus
> ruining any chance for those frequent pop-overs to the homes of
> friends and families during the day?
For a "serious" answer to that question ... I live in a town that I think
must be like PV. It is a rural town of 40,000. We have a university
[OSU ... go Beavers!], a fairly large hospital, and a major electronics
company [part of Hewlett-Packard, about 3,000 employees here]. Most of us
only commute about 10-15 minutes to work, so you could easily pop over to
visit a friend. This is extra easy in PV, since no one seems to care how
many (if any) hours you put in at work!
>11) Why doesn't anyone ever hire a REAL housekeeper instead of their
> mother-in-laws?
You do not HIRE your mother-in-law, she comes with the deal :-)
>13) Which airline can get me to Vienna in 20 minutes?
> { Or Hungary or ... }
Enterprise Transporting and Shuttlecraft.
> Mary Allison (ma...@uicsl.csl.uiuc.edu) Urbana, Illinois
Dave Ochs "Even if I did hit her it wouldn't have done any good
da...@cv.hp.com ... [sigh] should'a used a pail of water, that was it!"
Corvallis, OR - Edmund to Dr Tolan, about "Broom" Helga
Mary E. Allison
>I think we are supposed to be
>touched at how everyone pitches in to help Trev and Nat ... he will
>probably surprise her by taking her out for a drive on Chrismas Eve and
>end up at the house (everyone now ... awwwwwww).
How about 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... ACK!!
>What are you talking about? I don't remember seeing any scenes with
>Taylor and Derek :-)
Well, when one does an update, one must suffer.
>>3) How was Bobby's ski trip?
>Ruth and Joy just got a note from Bobby last week ... "Dear Mom and Dad,
>The skiing is great. Think I'll stay a few weeks more. Bobby."
HAHAHAHA
>>4) I think I would like to know how Courtland Electronics makes such a
>> grand profit in these troubled times. What is their product line,
>> anyway?
>Dancing beer cans and those keychains that make death-ray and tommy gun
>sounds.
So, now I know what Dave's been buying his family for Christmas.
>>13) Which airline can get me to Vienna in 20 minutes?
>> { Or Hungary or ... }
>Enterprise Transporting and Shuttlecraft.
Oh - the same way they get to New York so quick.
--
Peace on earth!!!! Gimme present!!!!
-- Animal
Mary Allison (ma...@uicsl.csl.uiuc.edu) Urbana, Illinois