MiSTed: "The Sorceress of Cyba-3" (5/6)
Jen White6
Part 5 of 6
By JenW...@aol.com and MsSc...@hotmail.com
Original story by Don R. Christensen
>
> CHAPTER 9
>
Brak: Chapter Nine... Chapter Nine... Chapter Nine...
> SPACE GHOST ACTS
>
Zorak: Like an idiot. What else is new?
> Soaring upward toward a large cloud mass, Space Ghost's heart
> tightened almost in pain.
Zorak: The rest of him stayed on the ground.
> As the shadow of another eclipse moved on, the
> clouds brightened puffily in their new cape of sunlight.
> "And I need heavy, heavy rain clouds," he groaned.
Brak: Try washin' your car. That always works for me.
> With great systems of weather stations exchanging influences over
> wide areas, the ability to control weather was now widespread. But Space
> Ghost had none of this to help him--not even the necessary burden of
> moisture that was the prime prerequisite of
Zorak: Sweat.
> rain.
> "More condensation. I've got to bring it here somehow!" Space Ghost
> decided. Never had more lives depended on rain, yet never were prospects
> less promising.
Moltar: [Space Ghost] Maybe I ought to come up with a less useless
plan.
> The skies of no universe will ever see a single act of greater
> individual effort than that wild roundup of rain by Space Ghost.
Brak: Yee haw, dawgie! Git along!
> While Satanari's colossal spider machine moved ever closer to the
> capital city of Cyba-3, extending a web of fire over everything in its
> way, the man who had so much to save swept around the planet, circling,
> arcing.
Moltar: Doing the loop-de-loop and barrel rolls.
Brak: Jonathan Livingston Space Ghost.
> Deftly using his belt and wrist-band
All: POWER BAND!
> controls, he first cloaked
> himself in a radiating heat shield so that his presence warmed the
> atmosphere.
Widow: Then he shot a hole in the ozone layer.
> Then, heat shield reversed to a blanket of cold, he raced back over
> his planet-circling course. As a chilled glass collects moisture from
> surrounding warmer air, so was Space Ghost drawing from the Cyban
> atmosphere the makings of a storm.
Moltar: So, Space Ghost is soggy. That's useful.
> "But I've got to keep ahead of it or I'm in trouble," he thought.
> He could see the graying movement of air forming and following
> behind him, violently now.
Widow: What is he doing, making a smog monster?
> He ended his tour in wide-sweeping acrobatic turns
[All hold up cards that read 7.5, 6.9, 10, 4.3, and -10,000,000]
> that piled up the
> pursuing moisture-laden air upon itself in whirlpools of restless cloud
> energy. Lightning crackled through the pack, born of the friction Space
> Ghost had created.
Zorak: Tornadoes devastated the planet, and the survivors cursed Space
Ghost for generations to come.
> Soaring high, he plunged back down through the murkiest part of the
Brak: Stuff cloggin' the potty.
> cloud pack. And when he came out its bottom side, a torrent of rain was
> pursuing him.
Zorak: Five bucks on the rain to win!
Brak: You're on, buddy!
> It soon became a deluge pouring down on the flaming land.
Brak: Quick! Call Charleton Heston! Call Cecil B. de Mille! Call
Harvey Fierstein!
> Queen Satanari's web of fire crackled stubbornly in the slashing
> rain, but it did not have a chance. Even the smoke was washed away by
> the rain.
> But it did not stop the great spider's crashing advance.
Metallus: The Spidrex must be stainless steel.
> Queen Satanari was livid with frustration and fury. "A storm! A
> storm! The skies were clear only moments ago!" she screamed.
Brak: [Satanari] I had my picnic basket all packed!
> Jan and Jace exchanged a look that spoke both a question and an
> answer: "Space Ghost!"
Zorak: So, it was a rhetorical look.
> Satanari glared at the twins, then returned to her operating
> controls. Suddenly she turned and snapped at the children.
Zorak: Biting off a chunk of flesh from each.
Widow: You are *disgusting*.
> "I know what you're thinking!
Metallus: In other words, she knows nothing!
> But you are fools!
Widow: Granted.
> Space Ghost
> cannot command storms. You may consider yourselves fortunate that I
> laugh at the idea."
Zorak: [dully] Ha. Ha ha. Ha.
> Her arching brows joined over her thin, straight nose.
Brak: Queen Jughead.
> "Just
> remember that only because of his fear for your lives are you continuing
> your existence." With a slow smile she added, "And his."
Moltar: The twins are continuing Space Ghost's existence. Riiight.
> The spider craft lurched crazily, and Jan held her breath tightly.
> She tried to make her body small so that its weight would not easily be
> felt by the chains.
Zorak: Typical woman, thinks dieting's the answer to everything.
> "Even inviso power can't get us out of this," Jace murmured.
Widow: Typical *man*, thinking super powers can get him out of
anything.
> It was true. Even if by some device they were able to activate
> their inviso power, their bodies, though invisible, would be no freer of
> the menacing chains.
Moltar: Invisible does not mean invulnerable. Gotcha.
> Even Space Ghost's invisible hands could not move them without
> triggering the death squeeze.
Metallus: We got that point *pages* ago!
>
> Space Ghost shared with Onar Honn the relief that came with the
> continuing rain.
Brak: Our crops are saved!
> Joining a group of worried Cybans standing on the
> city's edge, the spaceman tried to give them reassurance.
Moltar: [Worried Cyban] We don't want reassurance! We want our homes
back!
> "If you will just trust me for a little while, and make no attack
> against Satanari's machine, I may be able to end this vengeance of hers
> once and for all time."
Zorak: [Space Ghost] I am gonna go in there and kill her *so dead*.
> Onar Honn shook his head woefully. "Attack? What chance would we
> have against such a monster? Look! The rain is stopping."
> "We are doomed by the cruel fate that brought the sorceress back to
> crush us," said another official.
Zorak: Yeesh! These people practically enslave themselves! What's the
fun of that?
> "Don't blame fate," Space Ghost suggested quietly.
Brak: Blame it on the rain.
> "I made a grave
> mistake in
Moltar: Bothering to come back and save your sorry butts.
> not believing my first hunch about her--when she was playing
> the good, kind, exiled queen."
Moltar: WHAT? He *knew* she was faking all along?!
Brak: Cheat! No way!
> The men looked up at him with troubled, questioning eyes, but Space
> Ghost offered no further explanation. He said only, "I'm sorry. I'll
> try to make up for it."
Moltar: You can start by mowing the lawns of everybody on the planet.
>
>
[As the pyramid clears, Moltar makes a note on his clipboard]
Metallus: What are you writing?
Moltar: The date and time Space Ghost admitted he screwed up big-time.
Zorak: [giggling] The planet's in flames, and it's all Space Cheese's
fault! No wonder we never heard about this! Can you guess what he must
have paid to hush it up?
Widow: He believed she was lying, and yet he took her to her planet and
dropped her off anyway. What kind of fool is he?!
Zorak: A big, fat one.
Brak: And Blip still hasn't saved everyone's butt.
Moltar: Blip *won't* show up, so stop talking about him!
Zorak: That's why they've all been acting like idiots. Blip's the
brains of the outfit.
Moltar: Look, you can't have a hero without villains.
Metallus: So?
Moltar: Without us villains, Space Ghost is *nobody*.
Zorak: Yeah. I'll bet he knew about her, and let her loose on purpose
so he could save the day AGAIN! He just wants to keep his job.
Brak: Huh... we could put him outta business by not doing anything,
then, couldn't we?
[all look at each other]
All but Brak: Shut up, Brak.
Brak: Ya don't gotta to yell at me. Sheesh.
Zorak: [Space Ghost] I'm Space Ghost, and I can do whatever the heck I
want! I can teleport! I can command the rain! I am all-powerful! But I
can't stop some stupid woman with a big spider machine!
Moltar: I'm surprised that thing didn't rust solid when it rained.
Widow: There's got to be a way we can use this.
Zorak: Yeah, but how? And what good'll it do US?
Metallus: I say we blackmail him.
Zorak: Yeah! We call him up and tell him we'll spread the word around
that he LET Cyba-Three be destroyed if he doesn't-
Metallus: Give us his power bands!
Moltar: Been there, done that. Got the T-shirt and the keychain.
Brak: How about the monkey?
Moltar: *What* about the monkey?
Brak: We can tell him we want Blip. If it's the monkey that's always
saving the day, then that's what we should ask for, right?
Moltar: Just forget about the monkey!
Zorak: That might actually work.
Metallus: Demand the monkey AND the power bands!
Moltar: [annoyed sigh] There's more.
[The pyramid lights up again.]
>
>
> CHAPTER 10
>
> A CLEVER RUSE
>
Zorak: Space Ghost will ruse the day he messed with us! [maniacal
laughter]
Moltar: Save it for the cameras, Zorak.
> Space Ghost soared directly toward the center of the spider machine.
> "I can't risk other people's lives any longer," he told himself
> firmly.
Moltar: [Space Ghost] However, sidekicks aren't people, strictly
speaking...
> He pulled up directly before the startled eyes of the sorceress, a
> perfect target.
[All imitate cannons, machine guns, lasers, and other artillery firing]
> "The fool!" Satanari shrieked when she saw him. She immediately
> squeezed a firing control.
Zorak: What's the matter, hasn't she ever heard of a *trigger*?
> From a forward gun, a jagged beam leaped toward Space Ghost's chest-
Metallus: Yes!!
> -but it never reached its mark. Just inches away it crackled futilely
> against his shielding force field.
Metallus: Crud.
Brak: Do you smell bacon?
> She hurled other charges at him.
Zorak: [Satanari] Your Honor! Not only did he have an affair, he LIED
about it afterwards! And he messed up my dress!
> They bounced around him like corks
> on a storm-tossed sea.
Zorak: Making all the Cybans seasick.
> Finally he found her radio frequency and announced, "This was just
> to prove that your power means nothing to me, Sorceress!"
Zorak: [Space Ghost] Neither do your looks! It's *over* between us,
ya hear me?!
> Inside the cabin, two hearts leaped at the sound of his voice.
> "Space Ghost!" Jan and Jace cried
Brak: [Jan/Jace] Space Ghost found us! WAHHHH!
> together joyfully.
> But their hearts sank when they heard Space Ghost saying, "But I
> cannot defeat you as long as you hold my friends. So I'm ready to make a
> deal. My head for theirs, Satanari."
Brak: Van Gogh ups the ante.
> The sorceress laughed. "Your friends will stay in the shrinking
> chains, Space Ghost, until you are equally secured."
> "Agreed," said Space Ghost.
> Space Ghost's eyes darted to the children as he dropped through the
> open cabin door. Neither of them could manage a smile.
Brak: Could *you* smile if you had a pair of eyeballs floatin' in
front of ya?
> "No, Space Ghost," said Jace, "don't make such a bad trade. Gee,
> you're worth two hundred of us."
Moltar: What's two hundred times zero?
> "I wouldn't be worth anything," said Space Ghost, "if I let this
> witch take your lives this way."
Brak: [singing] My hero Zero...
> He extended his arms toward the sorceress, saying, "Put *me* in your
> chains, Satanari."
Widow: Oooohh...
Zorak: [to Black Widow] And you call *me* sick?
> He braced himself firmly against the lurching of the cabin.
Metallus: All the firepower she built into that machine, and she forgot
the shock absorbers.
> The
> woman stared at him. She swept her hand over a control and brought the
> machine to a halt.
Metallus: She found the "off" switch all by herself.
> "This will not stop my attack upon the Cybans," she declared. "You
> surely must realize that."
Moltar: [Space Ghost] I do realize that, and don't call me Shirley.
> "My first concern is the freedom and safety of my friends," the
> spaceman told her.
Zorak: [Space Ghost] Since I don't like the Cybans, you can torch them
all.
> Space Ghost wanted to bring his power bands into action immediately,
> but he held himself in check.
> "Chain me," he repeated.
Widow: Oooh!
Zorak: Anyone got a bucket of ice water?
Brak: I'll get one. [Brak leaves the room.]
> Satanari turned quickly and lifted a length of dull-colored chain
> from a nearby locker. Space Ghost knew that the chain could be freely
Moltar: Distributed, so long as it isn't altered.
> handled while it retained the dullness, but that its power could be
> triggered with a single jerk.
Zorak: [Space Ghost] And I'm just the single jerk to do it!
> "You are not fool enough to give yourself up," the sorceress
> declared. "You came hoping for the chance to turn some trick on me. But
Widow: [Satanari] *I* don't have to *pay* men for that!
> you see it is impossible."
> Behind her, the skies shadowed again, as if in ominous confirmation
> of her next words.
Moltar: Nice use of weather for effect. Gotta give her points for that.
> "I need not even move to jar the chains into their deadly
> constriction. My ancestors would have claimed the help of evil spirits,"
> she said with an evil smile, "but I have
Moltar: Stage hands.
> sly sonic relays that respond to
> a mere note of my voice."
Moltar: Let's hope it's not one of those "shrilling" notes.
> She noticed Space Ghost's quick glance and nodded. "Yes, there is
> one within the post they are chained to."
Moltar: [Space Ghost] Actually, I was looking for the bathroom.
> She studied him, waiting.
> His shoulders sagged in defeat.
> Turning his back, Space Ghost said quietly, "All right, you win.
> Wrap *me* in your chain."
Widow: [Under her breath] Yes...
Zorak: Where *is* Brak with that ice water?
> He heard her step toward him. The chain rattled softly. His hand
> crept to his inviso power control. He pressed hard and vanished.
Zorak: All right! The double cross! That means she can kill Jan and
Jace!
> Satanari hissed, "I warned you--" She got no further. The dull-hued
> chain was whipped from her hands and jerked around her own body. With a
> jerk it snapped to a gleaming brightness. Invisible hands quickly hooked
> it behind her.
Moltar: [Space Ghost] Want me to do up your zipper while I'm back here?
> "Join the party, Sorceress!" the voice of Space Ghost breathed close
> to her ear.
Moltar: [uncomfortably] I don't like the turn this has taken.
> "And if your voice triggers the sonic relay in that
> post *you* will be the sorriest one in *this* chain gang."
[All groan. Moltar does a rimshot.]
> "No! No!" Satanari pleaded. "Be careful! The chain--now it's set
> to constrict!"
Metallus: [Space Ghost] That *was* the idea.
> Space Ghost left her holding her breath in fear of each coming
> moment. He moved quickly to the twins.
Moltar: OK, now I REALLY don't like this.
> "Easy, kids," he said gently. His invisible hands searched the
> chain. "I've got to be careful."
Zorak: Or they'll survive.
> Any sudden, sharp movement of the chain would start the molecular
> shrinking action--too soon. On the planet Izhinor, Space Ghost had seen
> constrictor chains crush life away in seconds.
Moltar: WE GOT THE POINT CHAPTERS AGO!
> "What's the matter, Space Ghost?" Jace asked after a few moments.
> Jan whimpered.
Widow: I don't know what is more irritating, Jan's whimpering and
whining, or Satanari's shrilling.
> Switching off his inviso power, Space Ghost moved to where he could
> face them. His mouth was set in a tight line.
> "The chain can't be unfastened without a bit of rough handling. I'm
> afraid to risk it."
Zorak: So I'll just step back and use my Destructo Ray.
> With a muttered exclamation, Space Ghost leaped to intercept a
> furtive move by Satanari.
[Brak returns with a bucket, and goes up to Zorak.]
Zorak: What's that for?
Brak: You wanted some ice water, didn't you?
Zorak: Oh - never mind. Just put it down.
Brak: Okay.
[Brak goes to his seat and sets the bucket in front of himself.]
> "There's an answer--isn't there?" he snapped. "Tell me--or it will
> be your finish, Queenie."
> "You are too good and noble to commit me to certain death," she
> sneered. Space Ghost nodded.
Metallus: But he can ram her ship into a swarm of piranha mites, turning
her into a drooling moron.
[Brak glares at Metallus.]
> "But what if your spider machine rides rough," he threatened, "when
> I take it into custody? Can you be sure you won't fall and jar the
> constrictor chains?"
Brak: You could pack her in bubble wrap.
Metallus: Shut up, Brak.
> He moved to the controls.
> "No! Stop!" The whispered plea was as piercing as a scream.
Widow: Does the woman have any other modes besides "shrill" and
"scream"?
> Queen
> Satanari's body wavered dizzily, and Space Ghost leaped to steady her.
Brak: [Satanari] Ulp - got any Dramamine?
> "There is a way--to reverse the molecular pattern," she said
> finally, "so the chains will enlarge instead."
Zorak: No kidding! I thought there would be no way at all to open
those dang things up!
> Following her directions, within minutes Space Ghost was able to
> repolarize the electronic lineup of the chains.
Moltar: [Space Ghost] Don't ask me how just I did that!
> He watched with soaring
> relief as the chains swelled outward to release Jan and Jace.
> But not Satanari. She was a prisoner.
Moltar: In case you'd forgotten that Satanari was chained up a moment
ago.
>
>
Brak: Huh. This time Space Ghost didn't beat up the bad guy, or blast
her, or anything. He outsmarted her.
Metallus: Shut up, Brak.
Brak: But, I just mean, usually he blows up your planet or lair or
ship or something. I guess that's easier-
Metallus: Brak, SHUT UP.
Brak: [to Metallus] Why you gotta be so mean to me?
Metallus: Because you are a feebleminded idiot. We should be finding a
replacement for *you* first.
Zorak: Cram it, metal head! Brak's got a point.
Moltar: BOTH of you cram it! [pause] So. Space Ghost defeated
Satanari. She gave him a run for his money, though. She gets points for
that.
Widow: Why in the world did she call herself a sorceress? She didn't
use a bit of magic! Even the print on Jan's hand was faked!
Zorak: So what? You call yourself "Black Widow" but I don't see a lot
of spiders with you. Just plants and giant bugs. What's up with that?
Widow: You WANT her in the Council of Doom?
Zorak: Two human females... urrrgh.
Moltar: She DID get results for a while.
Metallus: And she has ambition. She wants to subjugate the planet, not
just loot a few ships. And she has *brains,* which we *need* around here.
[Brak glares at Metallus and clenches his fists. Moltar impatiently
restarts the pyramid.]
> CHAPTER 11
>
Brak: [takes a deep breath, then shouts] [The Count] *ELEVEN! ELEVEN
CHAPTERS! HA-HA-HA-HA!*
[Brak tips the icewater bucket over, so it sloshes onto Metallus's lap, then
jumps back just as lightning strikes, knocking Metallus backwards onto the
floor and electrifying the metal man most magnificently.]
Brak: [unsuccessfully trying to stifle a grin] Oops. Sorry.
[Moltar freezes the story within the pyramid. Everyone stares for a moment.
Metallus is shuddering, his circuits still electrified.]
Brak: [no longer grinning] Uh... sorry.
[Metallus appears to be regaining control of his motor functions. He makes
a sound like a speaker whose reverb is out of control.]
Zorak: Looks like his amp's busted. [snickers] He had it comin'.
Widow: There *is* hope for you yet, Brak.
[Moltar, Black Widow, and Zorak turn their attention back to the pyramid,
ignoring Metallus, who is shakily climbing back into his seat. Brak looks
surprised.]
*****
[CONTINUED NEXT SEGMENT]
so sez Jen "Call me MiSTer!" White.