[MiSTing] SFR6 (3/5)
Tjats
-------------------
[SOL int.] Jim, Servo and Crow are behind the counter
JIM: Sorry that little escape thing didn't work, you guys.
SERVO: Try again?
JIM: I don't think so. I almost warped the universe out of existence.
CROW: Pleeeeeese?
JIM: No.
[Gypsy comes in]
JIM: Hey, Gyps. Anything bad happening?
GYPSY: No, but I found these crystals. You want them?
JIM: What crystals?
GYPSY: Some of 'em are red, and some of 'em are blue, and some of 'em are
green...
[Gypsy continues to sound off colors]
JIM: Uh, Gyps?
GYPSY: ...and some of 'em are turqouise...
CROW: Gypsy, don't you think that-
GYPSY: ...and some of 'em are navy, and some of 'em are plaid...
SERVO: Uh, oh. Don't you see what's happening here?
JIM: Yeah, Gypsy's been tempered with by some unknown force!
GYPSY: ...and some of 'em are black, and...
CROW: But who could have done such a terrible thing?
JIM: Only one explanation: [close up] Pearl Forrester.
[Castle Forrester]
PEARL: No, it wasn't me. I've been down here with those two knobs trying to
construct a flow
chart for the opening scentence of the fanfic.
[SOL]
GYPSY: ...and some of 'em are magenta...
JIM: That's gotta be tough work.
[CF]
PEARL: I'll say.
[off screen we hear Bobo ooking softly and Observer weeping in pain]
OBSERVER[os]: Oh, the agony! This is too much of a strain on my already
weakened brain!
PEARL: Anyway, I'd just like to say something real important that you should
know...
[SOL]
CROW: And what is that?
GYPSY: ...and some of 'em are bluish-greenish-yellow...
[CF]
PEARL: GET BACK INTO THAT THEATER OR I'LL CUT YOUR THROATS AND CRAM TWIGS UP
YOUR--
[SOL] -movie sign-
JIM: Oh, we got FANFIC SIIIIGN!!!
GYPSY: ...and heck y'all, some of 'em aren't even crystals at all!
SERVO: That's nice, Gyps. AAAARRRGGGHHHHHH! STORY SIIIGN!!!
6...5...4...3...2...1...
[Jim and thems guys enter the theater. Now he's got *me* doing it!]
JIM: Maybe Gypsy's hard drive needs dusting...?
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
SERVO: Hey, a cold front!
>
>Mobius Mall
>
>"let's buy rotor's birthday cake" said Tails. They go to the grocery
>store.
JIM: Oh, yeah. Buy him a really cheesy grocery store-bought cake to show him
how much he's loved.
>Tails walks up to the cake counter. "One way past cool cake please" he
>says
CROW[as vendor]: Sorry, Sonic ate them all.
>The worker says "Uhh sorry, we don't sell way past cool cakes, we only
>sell 'moderately neet-o' cakes"
SERVO: Hey! That cake sounds neat-o!
>Tails jumps up on the counter and yells at the worker "Don't fock with me
>man! I said I want a way past cool focking cake now you better get me
>that or i'm gonna...."
JIM: And Tails is...eight years old?
CROW[as Tails]: I accuse my focking parents that I say fock all he time.
>CRRRAAASHH!!! A STEALTH-HOVER FLYS THROUGH THE ROOF OF THE GROCERY STORE
>AND LANDS IN THE AISLE! FOOD FLYS EVERYWHERE!!!
SERVO: Oh no! Food flies! I'm allergic to food flies!
>Robotnik, Snivley and the bots get out of the stealth-hover. Robotnik
>steals some food and puts it in his pocket.
CROW: But those were the chocolate-frosted brownies!
JIM: eew!
>"I like cookies" says Robotnik.
SERVO[as Robotnik]: They keep me thin.
>Robotnik sees the freedom fighters "GET THEM!!!" he yells.
>The freedom fighters make a run for it! Bots and robotnik are chasing
>them. They jump over food! Tails knocks over a shelf of cereal boxes!
JIM: He doesn't leave out *any* detail, does he?
>Robotnik slips on some froot loops! Tails Bunnie
CROW: Who is Tails Bunnie, is that a new character?
>and Bob jump in a
>shopping cart! Bots shoot at them! Pop cans are hit by laser fire! KABOOM
>KABOOM KABOOM! The grocery cart goies flying out of the store and crashes
>into the ground! Robotnik is in hot pursuit he rolls past the checkout
>counter after them!
JIM: Tails ties his shoes!
SERVO: The neat-o cakes go on sale!
CROW: Someone eats a peanut!
>The casheir says "Uhhh could I get a price check on a big fat guy?"
JIM: That'll be twenty cents.
SERVO: You get what you pay for.
>The freedom fighters run into a golf store! They steal a golf cart, Tails
>drives!
CROW: They don't sell golf carts in a golf store! You need to go to a motor
vehicles place!
>Robotnik runs into the store too, he jumps into a golf cart and
>all the tires go flat. He steps into another one, snivley gets in too.
>The bots get into another cart.
JIM: All the 'Bots in one cart?
SERVO[as 'Bot, singing]: Move over, move over...
>Robotnik says "Snivley, lets have some appropriate music for this
>situation"
>Snivley plays the sax as robotnik drives the cart after the freedom
>fighters. The bots follow Robotnik's cart, playing the other instruments.
CROW: All the antics of any given Fox cartoon.
>SCCRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PUTT PUTT! VROM SCREEEEE PUTT PUTT PUTT!!!!!
>They hit a corner! Robotnik almost tips over! The freedom fighters run
>over a hot dog vendor, robotnik steals a hot dog on the way by
>"Good hot dog" says Robotnik.
SERVO: Robotnik's so fat he keeps hitting the horn.
>The freedom fighter drive through The Gap!
[Servo's head explo-]
JIM: Let's not go there yet.
>The knock over clothes racks
CROW: -is annoyingly loud.
>there's gap clothers everywhere
JIM: Gee, why do you think that is, hmm?
>Robotnik is hit by denim shirts and
>kahikis! Robotniks cart crushes the Gap worker. "This is an original"
>says the worker.
SERVO: This is "Hobgoblins" plus "Blood and Metal"!
>Then they drive down the escalator! bumpity bump bump bump bump CRASH
>some people get knowcked of teh escalator, bump bump bump bump tey rech
CROW: Yeah, tell me about it. I can't keep my breakfast down either.
JIM: I don't think that's what he meant.
>the bottom PUTTT PUTT PUTTT vrooom!!!!!!!!!!!!
CROW: Hey, the golf cart puts! Hahahaha.
>They drive through the arcade and knock over arcade machines!
SERVO: As opposed to apple dumpling machines.
>They drive
>through starbucks! Tails grabs a pot of coffee and throws it at robotnik.
>It misses and hits Snivley!
JIM: At least it's going fast.
>"ARRRRRG HOT HOT HOT!!!!" says Snivley.
ALL: HOT, HOT, HOT!
>"Keep playing the music snivley!" says Robotnik.
CROW[as Snivley]: If you don't mind, I'm having a very bad time with some hot
pants!
SERVO: eew.
>Robotnik wasn't looking where he was going and he drives right thorough a
>pile of coffee cups! KRRRAAAAAASSSSSSSSHHHHHHH!!!!! BROKEN GLASS ALL OVER
>THE PLACE!
JIM: Then they'd be coffee *glasses*.
>They drive out into the food court IT'S A DEAD END! SCCRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!
CROW: They *could* try the door at the end.
>The freedom fighters try to turn around but Robotniks cart stops in front
>of them. Robotnik Snivley
SERVO: And again, a new amalgamed character.
>and the bots get out. The bots fire on the
>freedom fighters cart, turning it into scrap.
SERVO: Therefore killing the Freedom Fighters insde, right?
JIM: Nope.
>They capture the freedom
>fighters. A hoverunt blasts through the roof and picks up Robotnik and
>bots andf sniovley and freedoms fighters.
JIM: It can actualy hold them *and* Robotnik?
>"Oh mah stars" says Bunnie.
CROW[as Bunnie]: Some of 'em are green, and some of 'em are purple...
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
JIM: These ancient dinosaur bones once belonged to a race of deadly carnivors.
SERVO: That's re-using an old joke.
>
>Knoyhole
ALL: Huh!?!
>
>Sonic runs into knothole, and into sally's hut.
SERVO[as Sonic]: Ouch! That hurt! Next time I'll look for the door!
>"Yo Sal" says Sonic
>Then Sonic looks outside.
CROW[as Sonic]: Hey, you remodeled my hut! Great!
>"AHHHH! MY HUT!" he says
>"Hey Sonic your hut blew up" says Sally
JIM[as Sally]: Just thought you should know. Cybersex?
>"Yeah I know. Want to have cybersex?" says Sonic
ALL: Aaaaggggg!
JIM: I was *kidding*!
>bow-chicka-womp-bow-bow-chicka-chicka-mop-bop-wom-bow-chika
CROW: Heaven save me.
>"Sonic stop playing that disco music" said Sally "And no I won't have
>cybersex with you"
ALL: WHEW!
>"You are beutiful" says Sonic.
>"oh....well......ok i'll cybersex but just this once..." says Sally
ALL: NOOOOOOOO!!!
>JUST THEN A ROCKET BLOWS A HOLE THROUGH THE WALL OF THE HUT!
>ROTOR JUMPS THROUGH THE HOLE INTO THE HUT, CARRYING A ROCKET LAUNCHER!
>"JUst testing" said Rotor. He took a sip of coffee.
JIM: So, no one really cares about the unlawful destruction of anyone else's
things?
>"Yo rote, wassup 'alrus dude?" said Sonic
CROW: Ack.
>"This just in!" said Rotor "We have just recieved word from the mobius
>mall that Bunnie, Tails and Bob Prower have been captured by Robotnik!"
SERVO[as Rotor]: I turned myself into a news channel! Cool, huh?
>"Let's go save them!" says SOnic
>"Godo plan" says Sally
CROW: Oh, great, so Sally sits at home sipping tea while Sonic endagers
himself again.
>"Good coffee" says Rotor. Rotor dunks a donut!
SERVO: Uncalled for exclamation!
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
CROW: Just a reminder to sharpen your pencils daily.
>
>The Mall
>
>They walk into the mall.
JIM: Who?
>"Oops" says Sonic "I think we were supposed to go to the Death Egg, not
>the mall"
SERVO: Sonic gets 2 stars for inteligence in my book.
CROW: 2??
SERVO: Out of a million.
CROW: Oh.
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
JIM: Hey, it's shorter!
>
>Robotropolis
>
>Bot fighting action!
JIM: Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, by Milton Bradley.
>Sonic spin dashes bots! KAPOW 7 bots die!
CROW: Well, better then half a million, I suppose...
>Hoverunits shoot at sonic! 40 hoverunits! Sonic jumps into a dumpster!
SERVO[as Sonic]: Waaah! Go away!
>Rotor throws a grappling hook at a hoverunit, ROtor and Sally pulls the
>hoverunit to the ground. *CRASH* Sonic dashes the swat bot KABOOM!
>"No time to drone Mr. Bot" says Sonic
JIM: Actualy an okay joke.
SERVO: You feeling okay, Jim?
JIM: No, why?
>"Here is the plan" says Sally
SERVO[as Sally]: We shut down one of the power generators like we always do.
>"Sonic, you go into the death egg while
>rotor and I distract the bots outside"
CROW and JIM[as Sally and Rotor]: Hey! You 'bots! Look at us! Hey!
Woooooo!!! Go Packers!
Distracting!!! HAHAHA!
>"JUCIE TIME!" says Sonic he zooms into the death egg.
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
JIM: Oh, and look, some orange juicers.
>
>Death Egg, Robotocizer Prisoner Cells
SERVO: Why would a roboticizer be in the Death Egg?
>
>Tails is thrown into a cell. "oof" he says. Dr . Quack is in the cell!
JIM: Is it the nice/evil Dr. Quack, or the nice Dr. Quack?
>"AHHH!" says Tails
CROW: Are we going to keep on the "ahhh..." jokes, Jim?
JIM: Nah, we ran 'em dry last month.
>"I am good now" says Dr. Quack
SERVO[as Quack, maniacly]: I'm good now! heheheh, hee hee hee, ha, hah hah!
AH, HAHAHAHA!!!
>"Probably why you're in this cell" says Tails
>"Can I join the freedom fighters" says Quack
JIM: It's that Snively defection thing all over again!
>"Ok" says Tails "If we get out of here"
CROW[as King Acorn]: I'm going to press you against the wall and imprison you!
Call me Max!
>1 minute later sonic dashes in!
>"Yo yo?" says Sonic
>"Hey Sonic!" says Tails
>"Yo lil bro, I will save you!" says Sonic
JIM[as Tails]: No, that's okay. Being chained up is neat-o!
>Sonic spin dashes a power cable. He gets electrocuted!
>"ow" says crispy sonic
SERVO[as boozed KFC customer]: I'll have some extra crispy hedgehog, and some
bufallo wings on
the side.
>The alrms go off! WAAAH WAAH WAAAAAH!!!
JIM: The alarms must be real upset over something.
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
>
CROW: Nike treads.
>Robotropolis
>
>Sally and Rotor are in a hoverunit being chased by stealth bots! They
>drive thru an alley! KABOW POW POW laser fire and grabage can exploding
>all around!
JIM: I'm surprised Robotropolis even *has* garbage cans with the "disrespect
nature" attitude.
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
SERVO: Enjoy our decreasing and increasing number of roadway cones, for the
home or office!
>
>Prison cells
CROW: This fanfic has more editing than Devil Fish!
SERVO: Too bad the coast guard isn't in this, they could really help out.
>
>SWAT bots storm the area! But Sonic pulls out a power ring!
JIM: From where? His butt?
>"DRRRROOONNNEEE" go the bots "MUST KILL SONIC, MUST KILL SONIC"
SERVO: Sonic'll download Windows 98 into their systems in the blink of an eye
and watch the fun.
>The bots attack! Sonic flashes in a beam of light and he's SUPER
>SONIC!!!!
ALL: But he needs 49 more rings and 7 chaos emeralds!!!
>Sonic fights SWAT bots!
>FYOOO!
>ROP!
>CORK!
SERVO: "Cork"?
>WARG!
CROW: Son of Morg!
>DRROOONNNE!
>ZAP ZAP DIDDy!
>MOP!
SERVO: Oh, I get it, Sonic's "mopping" the floor with them! Hee, hee.
JIM: Bridge on the River..what?
>KWAI!
JIM: Thank you.
>32 SKIDOO!
CROW: My friend has only 28. How can you have that many snowmobiles?
>BANG BANG BANG BANG!
>BA-ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!
>SKREEE!
JIM: We're in the world of BATMAN!
'BOTS: Dadadadadadadada BATMAN!!!
>ow
>WOOOOOOAAAAAH!
>BOOOMITY!
SERVO: Is this the internet IM of Sonic and Sally's cybersex?
>The electric cable sparks! SPAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRKKKKK!!!!! Bots gewt hit by
>sparks and die!
JIM: But technicaly they were never alive to begin with.
>The bars to the cells go down! Bob kicks the SWAT bot that had his
>shotgun!
CROW: Great, instead of lazer pistols they use six-shooters, huh?
>Tails kung-fus bots! Bunnie beats bots!
>"Fock ye!" says Bob, blasting bots.
JIM[singing]: People say I fockye around!
SERVO: PLEASE, JIM!
JIM: Sorry.
>WAAIIIII SSSPPPEAAKKKK WOOOOOOOOH!
>says Tails, kicking bots
SERVO: Tails said that? I thought it was the squeaking of the robots' joints.
>Bunnie jump kicks a bot but another bot jump kicks Bunnie!
ALL[singing]: Isn't it ironic?
>Bunnie falls
>down!
>"Ah get knocked down, but ah get up again!" says Bunnie. Bunnie gets up
>again and fights mor bots!
JIM: STOP THE INSANITY!!!! AAARRRRRGGGHH!
>900 bots walk into the room, single file.
SERVO: Ever heard of "attack in force"?
>Sonic revs up his spin dash.
>Bots say "WE KILL SONIC, PRIORITY 1"
>Sonic spin dashes the bots, killing them all.
>"Y'all killed the bots!" says Bunnie
JIM: WHERE'S THE OUTRAGE???!!!
SERVO: Jim, you okay?
>JUST THEN TANK BOT IV DRIVES THROUGH THE WALL AND RUNS OVER SONIC!
JIM: ON THE DEATH EGG??? AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!
>Tails kicks the bot! No use, the bot fires a missle at Tails!
>"This is the baddest TANK BOT yet!" says sonic.
>Dr. Quack pulls a wire out of tank bot. TANK BOT IV falls over and dies!
SERVO: Wow! What a daring way to stop the "baddest TANK BOT yet!"
>"Nice work Dr" says Sonic
>"Now let's JUCIE TIME" says Quack
JIM: DOCTOR QUACK SAID THAT??? AAAAAAAAAAAK!
CROW: Let's beat it.
SERVO: Okay.
>"First I need a chili dog" says Sonic. He fills up his backpack with
>chili dogs from the vending machine.
>
JIM: A VENDING MACHINE ON THE DEATH EGG???
[Jim colapses on the floor. Servo and Crow leave the theater]
[commercials]
-----------------
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Jim W.
aka
Jim, that Mistie
"This is where the fish lives."
"I KNOW!"
"I'm cahmeeng!"
"I just don't wanna get sued." -Richard Grieco