Night Of The Living Dead, by JimL2
JimL2
Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
super-classic horror movie, but if you ever watch it, (I did on New Years Eve)
you would even say it glows-oops, sorry, heh-heh. But really, if you ever see
it, you will see that I could make a better movie than this. Let me sum up the
movie for you (kinda long, but please read, 'cause it took a lot of time to
write and is kinda funny, includes some points to MST if you ever want to do
that) :
White woman in trench coat and white man (wearing black gloves for some reason)
who is her brother (I guess) go to graveyard. Brother taunts sister about her
being afraid. A zombie (I think, it was never very clear) who looks like a man
walking stiffly and making a funny face lumbers over and kills white man by
touching his neck. White woman of course screams, tries to run, high heel shoe
falls off. She lies on ground until she can get other shoe off (wouldn't want
to be caught with just one shoe! Too unfashionable). She gets in car. Can't
start car for some reason. Zombie-guy keeps running into car and pushing on
door. She locks doors. She puts car in neutral and coasts (?) along the flat
road. She immediatley hits tree, gets out, runs, finds old house, walks around
in it, gets scared by antler head on the wall, goes upstairs, finds rotting
corpse ($ 29.95), screams, falls down stairs, tries to go outside (ahh, the
stupid woman. What's a horror movie without one?), black guy comes in, asks her
who she is, where is everyone, etc. She won't say anything.
About now, I switched to watch "Something Wicked This Way Comes", which by the
way is a much better movie. turned back to this.
Now there is a middle aged white guy with his wife. He is trying to kill black
guy who is trying to keep zombies (there are about 10 now) out. Black guy takes
white guys gun and shoots him. White guy falls in basement. White woman goes
down and sees little girl eating white guys arm (I think, it might have been a
salami). Lady acts stupid by not running away, but staying there, apparently
comforting the girl. Girl kills lady with trowel (even though there is a pair
of shears on the wall next to the trowel). Stabs wax dummy (lady, I guess)
multiple times, even though when you see her there is only one stab wound.
Somehow gets blood (or chocolate syrup) on the wall. Zombies break hole in
door, kills original white woman because she refuses to get away from the door.
Black guy goes in basement, shoots girl, bars door, and hides until morning. A
bunch of rednecks (okay, okay, but they're from the south, drunk, and all
wearing unwashed plaid shirts), plus a guy in a helicopter get their guns
(enough for an army) and form a posse to kill the zombies, apparently led by a
fat man in a suit who didn't have time to fasten his own ammo belt, so he
drapes it on his shoulder. They walk through fields shooting zombies (I think,
they looked like guys ambling around, and the posse didn't take too much time
to determine that they were zombies. "Wait! Guys! Wait up-BLAM-Ouuuu!"), which
raises an interesting question: if they're already dead, how can you kill them
(As they walked along I said "Zombies are getting right back up behind
them...")? They come to the white house (Zork: night of the living dead) and
shoot the black guy. For the credit sequence, they show them picking the black
guy up with meat hooks. That presents so many jokes it's not even funny (well,
it is, but I couldn't think up another comparison)
-----------As always, but this time more than ever: Thank you for your
time--------------
Jim "Phew!" Lauwers
Kevin Mowery
JimL2 (ji...@aol.com) wrote:
: Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
: super-classic horror movie, but if you ever watch it, (I did on New Years Eve)
: you would even say it glows-oops, sorry, heh-heh. But really, if you ever see
: it, you will see that I could make a better movie than this. Let me sum up the
: movie for you (kinda long, but please read, 'cause it took a lot of time to
: write and is kinda funny, includes some points to MST if you ever want to do
: that) :
Y'see, I get exactly the opposite out of the film. Keeping in
mind that the film was made for about a buck eighty, it's damn good.
You've got the zombies--mindless killing machines that turn anyone into
another mindless automaton. Not even the little girl is safe from their
depredations. They're a perfect metaphor for--well, any faceless,
mindless group you'd want to run in fear from (insert politcal joke here).
In a way, they're the horror equivalent of the Red Scare.
You've also got the horror equivalent of Das Boot for
claustrophobia. The house isn't all that big, but it's the only safe
place. And the heroes are slowly losing ground. Enhancing that
claustrophobia is the distrust and outright hatred between the people
holed up inside.
It's also what some folks have called the beginning of the
"splatterpunk" movement in horror. Previously, horror movies would show
one shadow stabbing another, or an axe dropping and a suggestion of a head
dropping into a bucket (it's at this point that a thought occurs to me:
I'd really like to see MST3K do "The Corpse Grinders", apropos of
nothing). In NOTLD, after the Young Lovers are turned into a couple of
zombie snacks, you watch the zombies munch on their flesh (well, okay,
it's KFC, but suspend disbelief). Suggestion of terror? Naw, it's *right
here* and it's still scary.
It's got a mostly white cast but the black man is the hero (and
he's also the only character who has his head on fairly straight).
Finally, the nihilism is beautiful. Is there anyone safe from the
zombies? No. Not even the people that would have been guaranteed to live
in a previous film--the little girl, the young lovers--live through the
film. Death is death, and the life of a little girl isn't any more
valuable than the life of her idiot father. (Interestingly, the little
girl's transformation into a zombie illustrates something that I find
essential to a truly scary movie: the perversion of the familiar, trusted,
or beautiful). And no matter how much you fight against, and maybe even
win against, the bad guy, maybe it doesn't make a bit of difference.
Maybe you *can* win out against the undead hordes, but the only difference
between the zombies roaming around killing people and the rednecks roaming
around shooting anything that moves is that when the rednecks shoot you,
you aren't getting back up.
--
Kevin "Professor Bobo" Mowery________...@freenet.columbus.oh.us
"I can't go away with you on a rock climbing weekend / What if something's
on TV and it's never shown again?" --The Lemonheads, "Outdoor Type"
DON3k
Come on! When are you people going to realize that Night Of The Living Dead
was about the Vietnam war...
Ya know, the Zombies were "Charlie" - the stupid girl represented 18 year
old guys who were blindly being thrown into the horrors of war. The black
guy represented the "old school" military men. Clearly the glove-wearing
brother represents the Hippies warning others about the evils of war. The
guy in the basement was representative of parents everywhere feeling it's
their child's duty to go off to war, while fearing their imminent death -
and the zombie daughter in the basement is the realization of that fear.
Oh, and the exploding/burning truck represents Kennedy's assassination....
On 2nd thought, I think it was really all about people running from
monsters, or something...
DON3k
I don't know...
Hotchka
Kevin Mowery writes:
That was absolutely brilliant. Kevin, I insist that you marry me.
Shelby
Recommends seeing NOTLD is a dark dance club with the sound off and techno
music blaring
Kevin Mowery
Hotchka (hot...@aol.com) wrote:
: Kevin Mowery writes:
[my defense of NOTLD snipped]
: That was absolutely brilliant. Kevin, I insist that you marry me.
Okay! <flips through rolodex> I don't think I'm married to you
yet.... I'd be honored.
: Shelby
: Recommends seeing NOTLD is a dark dance club with the sound off and techno
: music blaring
The first time I saw it all the way through was on an incredibly
low-powered UHF channel here in Columbus (channel 62) on a late, late
movie. This channel later went on to show horror movies with two to four
dancers from a bikini bar near my house and some guy, all getting royally
toasted, as hosts. Then it started showing programming from the satellite
channel Network One, which late at night didn't show movies but the same
dozen or so bikini contests it owned. It now shows another satellite
channel that's all religious programming (Network One has apparently
ceased to be).
Granted, the dancers were no Fritz the Night Owl, but then again,
they were no Fritz the Night Owl. I miss them and their cheesy horror
movies and the tasteless comedy bits.
Norb42
In "Flashdance", JIML2 wrote:
<Long, long analysis snipped>
Well, give them a break. They were from Pittsburgh.
Norb
whose family knows some of the zombies
Robert Tilley
JimL2 (ji...@aol.com) wrote:
: Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
: super-classic horror movie, but if you ever watch it, (I did on New Years Eve)
: you would even say it glows-oops, sorry, heh-heh. But really, if you ever see
: it, you will see that I could make a better movie than this. Let me sum up the
: movie for you (kinda long, but please read, 'cause it took a lot of time to
: write and is kinda funny, includes some points to MST if you ever want to do
: that) :
Boy.. I know you are upset and all and so I am going to pretend I never
heard you say that <1/2 point>
Night Of The Living Dead is the only movie I can think of that I can sit
down and watch over and over and over and still feel a genuine scare from..
Its a piece of art that I cherish in my video collection..
I'm not saying it couldn't be misted.. But to say its a bad movie is just
wrong..
I'm gonna get off my soapbox before I get all worked up..
: White woman in trench coat and white man (wearing black gloves for
some reason)
He is a dickhead.. just his driving gloves..
: who is her brother (I guess) go to graveyard. Brother taunts sister about her
BF i believe..
: being afraid. A zombie (I think, it was never very clear) who looks like a man
: walking stiffly and making a funny face lumbers over and kills white man by
: touching his neck. White woman of course screams, tries to run, high heel shoe
Umm he fell against a headstone didn't he?
: falls off. She lies on ground until she can get other shoe off (wouldn't want
: to be caught with just one shoe! Too unfashionable). She gets in car. Can't
: start car for some reason. Zombie-guy keeps running into car and pushing on
The guy had the keys..
: door. She locks doors. She puts car in neutral and coasts (?) along the flat
: road. She immediatley hits tree, gets out, runs, finds old house, walks around
Rolls down the slope they drove up..
: in it, gets scared by antler head on the wall, goes upstairs, finds rotting
: corpse ($ 29.95), screams, falls down stairs, tries to go outside (ahh, the
: stupid woman. What's a horror movie without one?), black guy comes in, asks her
: who she is, where is everyone, etc. She won't say anything.
You really didn't like this movie did you.. watch it again.. sober. pay
attention.. maybe the fact that its black and white makes it harder..
: About now, I switched to watch "Something Wicked This Way Comes", which by the
: way is a much better movie. turned back to this.
*looks around for a shotgun* Gotta destroy the brain.. its the only way
to kill it..
I had to delete that whole last part.. I'm getting frustrated as hell
just reading it 8{
I hate seeing a movie that I deeply enjoy ripped into without any real
understanding of the film.. if you must.. go watch the Tom Savini
remake.. its not quite as good.. but its color.. and some of the gore
effects are a little nicer..
George Romero is an artist.. he has directed 2 of my all time favourite
horror movies.. Dawn of the Dead and Night of the living Dead.. (and not
ot mention he directed the commercial for Biohazard 2 which I am aching
to see) I really get irked to see someone slag his movies.. Sorry if I
sound harsh..
Tarpo
IMHO.. Humble? Hell no!
----
qba1015<at>infonet.st-johns.nf.ca
MSTie # 70006
,-----------------------------------,
|Ah, Christmas! |
| Let's go kill a tree for Jesus!|
'-----------------------------------`--------------------,
|All I want for Christmas is |
| a box of smurfs and a mallet. - Dunno|
'-----------------------------------------`
Cory Mccasland
>George Romero is an artist.. he has directed 2 of my all time favourite
>horror movies.. Dawn of the Dead and Night of the living Dead.. (and not
>ot mention he directed the commercial for Biohazard 2 which I am aching
>to see) I really get irked to see someone slag his movies.. Sorry if I
>sound harsh..
No, if you were being harsh you'd be screaming "SHUT UP YOU LOSER!
NOTL RULZ!!!". But maybe I'm confusing harshness with trollness.
I'd almost recommend he see Dawn of the Dead, but if he didn't like
NOTL because it was B&W, I'm sure he won't be able to put up with
bad make-up effects (the only part of the film that hasn't aged well).
However, this is his opinion, and he's welcome to it.
And it *might* be mistable. I've considered Misting the remake, even
though I prefer it to the original in some regards, mainly the new
version of Barbara, and how three films are summed up in one line.
"They're us, and we're them."
They're supposedly pulling a Star Wars and adding new scenes to it
this year, like what happened at the diner Ben described. How can you
do that when the original Ben is dead? I suppose Tony Todd can do it.
CDM
Joel V. Mike
ji...@aol.com (JimL2) wrote:
>Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
>super-classic horror movie,
This is the most asinine review of a classic movie that I have ever
read. First of all, it isn't a horror movie, it is a comedy. Most of
the humor comes from the irony laced two or three layers deep
throughout the film, although there are some lower humor moments
provided by the police chief ("Are they slow moving? Yeah, there're
dead, they're...all messed up.")
>White woman in trench coat and white man (wearing black gloves for some reason)
Probably the same reason I wear black gloves-to keep my hands warm.
>who is her brother (I guess) go to graveyard. Brother taunts sister about her
>being afraid. A zombie (I think, it was never very clear)
It is a ghoul. Zombies don't eat people.
>who looks like a man
>walking stiffly and making a funny face lumbers over and kills white man by
>touching his neck.
Irony number 1-brother teases sister that stranger is coming to get
her. Turns out, he really is!
>Now there is a middle aged white guy with his wife. He is trying to kill black
>guy who is trying to keep zombies (there are about 10 now) out. Black guy takes
>white guys gun and shoots him.
Black guy is the protagonist, and middle aged white guy is his
antogonist. MAWG thinks they should barricade themselves in the
basement. BG insists they should stay upstairs where there is room to
maneuver. In any other movie, BG would be shown to be right, but he
only survives because he eventually does barricade himself in the
basement. Of course, doing so didn't save MAWG or his family.
>A
>bunch of rednecks (okay, okay, but they're from the south,
No, they're from Pittsburgh.
>They walk through fields shooting zombies (I think,
>they looked like guys ambling around, and the posse didn't take too much time
>to determine that they were zombies. "Wait! Guys! Wait up-BLAM-Ouuuu!"), which
>raises an interesting question: if they're already dead, how can you kill them
Shoot 'em in the head and kill the brain, or set 'em on fire. Beat
'em or burn 'em, they go up pretty easy.
>(As they walked along I said "Zombies are getting right back up behind
>them...")? They come to the white house (Zork: night of the living dead) and
>shoot the black guy.
Again, in any other film, BG, after surving the onslaught of the
ghouls all night, while all the other people in the house die, would
live happily ever after. Here, he is mistaken for one of the living
dead and is killed. Brilliant end.
Glad I could enlighten you.
_______________________
Eat tacos, guacomole, tostados, and DEATH!
Judith Jacobs
hot...@aol.com (Hotchka) wrote:
>Kevin Mowery writes:
(Excellent--because I agree with it--appraisal of Night of the Living
Dead, snipped)
>
>That was absolutely brilliant. Kevin, I insist that you marry me.
>
>Shelby
I liked this movie a *lot*. Because I saw it on Monstervision, I was
expecting it to be a piece of trash that Joe Bob would rip to shreds.
It wasn't, he didn't. Good work Kevin, BTW!
--Judith, feeling guilty for her sarcastic comments earlier about
Kevin's synopses.
Selki
Robert Tilley <qba...@InfoNET.st-johns.nf.ca> wrote:
: JimL2 (ji...@aol.com) wrote:
: : Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
: Boy.. I know you are upset and all and so I am going to pretend I never
: heard you say that <1/2 point>
American Gothic, Lucas Buck to Caleb?
: : White woman in trench coat and white man (wearing black gloves for
: : some reason)
(Is this what's known as piggybacking?) Hello? They were at a graveyard,
visiting someone's grave, right? I know black isn't as strictly associated
with mourning these days, but does the phrase "still in black gloves" ring
a bell with anyone else?
I first saw this movie when I was already really really tired, and found
it a grim experience, but I do respect it, especially its avoidance of
cliches, and the exceptional ending.
Speaking of zombies, I saw a funny short film last night at Evecon
(see Evecon thread) by someone named Roc Savage. Thumbs down to the first
film of his they showed (something about Groovy vs. Dr. Brain in the
title), but they rounded out the hour with El Gringo Bravo's demonstration
of how to fight zombies. The bit-by-bit destruction of the sole
practice zombie's shirt and El Gringo Bravo's running commentary
were what made it work for me ("Zombies are stupid and easy to
fool", "They're not really that dangerous, as they usually can't bend
their elbows so their teeth are far away"). Apparently there's a sequel
with higher production values ("It has more zombies and we actually
used make-up for the zombies this time", the tech guy said), but they
didn't have time to show it.
--se...@clark.net
"Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that
can be counted counts." - Big Al
Kevin Mowery
Judith Jacobs (jaco...@engin.umich.edu) wrote:
: hot...@aol.com (Hotchka) wrote:
: >Kevin Mowery writes:
: --Judith, feeling guilty for her sarcastic comments earlier about
: Kevin's synopses.
I know I'm gonna regret this, but when?
Robert Tilley
Cory Mccasland (TFZ...@prodigy.com) wrote: :
: I'd almost recommend he see Dawn of the Dead, but if he didn't like
: NOTL because it was B&W, I'm sure he won't be able to put up with
: bad make-up effects (the only part of the film that hasn't aged well).
I don't consider any of the makup effects BAD.. maybe a little dated. but
comeon.. they were groundbreaking.. even though the neon blood in Dawn
bugs the hell out of ne..
: However, this is his opinion, and he's welcome to it.
: And it *might* be mistable. I've considered Misting the remake, even
: though I prefer it to the original in some regards, mainly the new
: version of Barbara, and how three films are summed up in one line.
: "They're us, and we're them."
I enjoyed the remake.. but the wonderful creepiness and genuine terror
caused by the original is lost in it.. which is sad.. becuse otherwise it
was very well done..
: They're supposedly pulling a Star Wars and adding new scenes to it
: this year, like what happened at the diner Ben described. How can you
: do that when the original Ben is dead? I suppose Tony Todd can do it.
This is a rumour that George Romero himself squashed.. he doesn't want to
go back and change the work he is already immensely proud of.. he wants
to move forward.. maybe direct a 4th installment.. Then weold have one in
the 60s.. the 70s.. the 80s.. and the 90s.. It would be incredibly cool..
Tarpo
Robert Tilley
Selki (se...@clark.net) wrote:
: Robert Tilley <qba...@InfoNET.st-johns.nf.ca> wrote:
: : JimL2 (ji...@aol.com) wrote:
: : : Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
: : Boy.. I know you are upset and all and so I am going to pretend I never
: : heard you say that <1/2 point>
: American Gothic, Lucas Buck to Caleb?
Nope.. never did see any American Gothic when it was on.. So I can't
quote from it.
: : : White woman in trench coat and white man (wearing black gloves for
: : : some reason)
: (Is this what's known as piggybacking?)
Yes.. 'tis.. welcome to my back ;}
> Hello? They were at a graveyard,
: visiting someone's grave, right? I know black isn't as strictly associated
: with mourning these days, but does the phrase "still in black gloves" ring
: a bell with anyone else?
Ohh better than my grasp..
: I first saw this movie when I was already really really tired, and found
: it a grim experience, but I do respect it, especially its avoidance of
: cliches, and the exceptional ending.
Such a great surprise ending.. To bad Tom Savini changed it in the remake..
Umm nenver had much to add.. Just wasting bandwidth as I want for my
monitor to die 8{
Cory Mccasland
>This is a rumour that George Romero himself squashed.. he doesn't want
to
>go back and change the work he is already immensely proud of.. he wants
>to move forward.. maybe direct a 4th installment.. Then weold have one
in
>the 60s.. the 70s.. the 80s.. and the 90s.. It would be incredibly cool..
The only reason I thought he might do it would be to raise money
for the fourth one. I'm glad he hasn't succumbed to Lucas-itis.
Otherwise, we might see Ben shooting first.
CDM
Selki
Robert Tilley <qba...@InfoNET.st-johns.nf.ca> wrote:
: Selki (se...@clark.net) wrote:
: : (Is this what's known as piggybacking?)
: Yes.. 'tis.. welcome to my back ;}
Um... so where does the term "piggyback" come from, anyway, do any
etymologists know (or don't I want to know?)?
: : Hello? They were at a graveyard,
: : visiting someone's grave, right? I know black isn't as strictly associated
: : with mourning these days, but does the phrase "still in black gloves" ring
: : a bell with anyone else?
: Ohh better than my grasp..
*blush* Oh p'shaw, just a result of the Georgette Heyers I've read (sort
of like Jane Austen, only funnier -- I cracked up at the last sentence of
one I re-read at my mom's over Christmas: "I like it VERY MUCH!" but then
MST3K seems to creep in everywhere these days :-)
: Such a great surprise ending.. To bad Tom Savini changed it in the remake..
Didn't catch the remake, but doesn't sound like I missed much.
--se...@clark.net
"Ah -hmm! Roof pig! Most unexpected!" -- The Tick vs. the Deadly Bulb
Robert Tilley
Selki (se...@explorer.clark.net) wrote:
: Robert Tilley <qba...@InfoNET.st-johns.nf.ca> wrote:
: : : (Is this what's known as piggybacking?)
: : Yes.. 'tis.. welcome to my back ;}
: Um... so where does the term "piggyback" come from, anyway, do any
: etymologists know (or don't I want to know?)?
Come now.. do we REALLY want to know? honestly..
(I don't know.. just trying ot talk myself through till I can run)
: : Ohh better than my grasp..
: *blush* Oh p'shaw, just a result of the Georgette Heyers I've read (sort
: of like Jane Austen, only funnier -- I cracked up at the last sentence of
: one I re-read at my mom's over Christmas: "I like it VERY MUCH!" but then
: MST3K seems to creep in everywhere these days :-)
Cute blush ;}
: : Such a great surprise ending.. To bad Tom Savini changed it in the remake..
: Didn't catch the remake, but doesn't sound like I missed much.
Oh don't get me wrong! The remake is incredible.. Its definitely worth
the rent if you enjoy the original.. the makeup is really nice..
And there are some much nicer scenes in the remake..
But its not the original.. thats for sure..
Tarpo
----
qba1015<at>infonet.st-johns.nf.ca
Mstie # 70006
"Let's just say that if complete and utter chaos was lightning, he'd
be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing
wet copper armour and shouting 'All gods are bastards'."
--- Terry Pratchett, The Colour of Magic
Linda
JimL2 wrote:
>
> Night Of The Living Dead is a real peice of crap. It's regarded as some kind of
> you would even say it glows-oops, sorry, heh-heh. But really, if you ever see
> it, you will see that I could make a better movie than this. Let me sum up the
> movie for you (kinda long, but please read, 'cause it took a lot of time to
> write and is kinda funny, includes some points to MST if you ever want to do
> that) :
>
> walking stiffly and making a funny face lumbers over and kills white man by
> to be caught with just one shoe! Too unfashionable). She gets in car. Can't
> start car for some reason. Zombie-guy keeps running into car and pushing on
> road. She immediatley hits tree, gets out, runs, finds old house, walks around
> corpse ($ 29.95), screams, falls down stairs, tries to go outside (ahh, the
> stupid woman. What's a horror movie without one?), black guy comes in, asks her
> who she is, where is everyone, etc. She won't say anything.
>
> way is a much better movie. turned back to this.
>
> guy who is trying to keep zombies (there are about 10 now) out. Black guy takes
> down and sees little girl eating white guys arm (I think, it might have been a
> salami). Lady acts stupid by not running away, but staying there, apparently
> comforting the girl. Girl kills lady with trowel (even though there is a pair
> of shears on the wall next to the trowel). Stabs wax dummy (lady, I guess)
> multiple times, even though when you see her there is only one stab wound.
> Somehow gets blood (or chocolate syrup) on the wall. Zombies break hole in
> door, kills original white woman because she refuses to get away from the door.
> Black guy goes in basement, shoots girl, bars door, and hides until morning. A
> bunch of rednecks (okay, okay, but they're from the south, drunk, and all
> wearing unwashed plaid shirts), plus a guy in a helicopter get their guns
> (enough for an army) and form a posse to kill the zombies, apparently led by a
> fat man in a suit who didn't have time to fasten his own ammo belt, so he
> they looked like guys ambling around, and the posse didn't take too much time
> to determine that they were zombies. "Wait! Guys! Wait up-BLAM-Ouuuu!"), which
> raises an interesting question: if they're already dead, how can you kill them
> them...")? They come to the white house (Zork: night of the living dead) and
> guy up with meat hooks. That presents so many jokes it's not even funny (well,
> it is, but I couldn't think up another comparison)
> -----------As always, but this time more than ever: Thank you for your
> time--------------
>
> Jim "Phew!" Lauwers