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MiSTed: The Truth is Out There?...Possibly (3/3)

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Roland Warner

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Sep 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM9/13/98

<M&TB enter the theater>

Tom: What'd she say, Mike?

Mike: We're all doomed, Tom.

Tom: Thought so!

> Cream is also convinced that

Crow: He is a major part of the crop.

> the intelligences behind the crop
> circle phenomena are paving the way for the soon unveiling of his messiah who
> will usher in a New World Order and a New Age...Sounds more like the antichrist.

Tom: But doesn't everything before this refute Christianity?

>
> Skye Ambrose, a famous abductee who was "born again"

Mike: Evidently the aliens have tapped into cloning.

> as she said as a result
> her encounter with a strange "grey" type alien with bright sparkling eyes,

Crow: A very brief and confusing description of a bad date.

> predicted at a recent UFO conference in Bellevue, Washington; that "evolution
> was entering a "peak cycle" that will create a New Order on the planet.

Tom: Mike, how come every conspiracy nut-case talks of a "New Order"?
Mike: Because they hate the government and want to see a "New Order"
established, even though it's the only country where you can legally say
that.

> Polarization is occuring on this planet to separate those who will accept the
> message and evolve toward Unity and Oneness and self-realized Godhood and those
> who will not not."

Crow: Oh my God! It *IS* Siddhartha! Shoot me now, Mike!

>
> -Many alien prophesies to contactees of the 50's or to-day have failed to come
> true or appear to be outright lies.

Tom: Okay, so that leaves out the 60s, 70s, and 80s. Doesn't that
seem awfully biased?

> 14. Many contactees and abductees to-day
> are again delivering warnings of coming earth changes and disasters along with
> promises of help from aliens...they feel choosen to deliver a message to
> mankind ...the prophesies may be creating a false hope and dependancy in their
> abductors who they know little about.

Mike: Wow, disasters and changes, yep, I see hope in that.

>
> - So what are we dealing with? New Age aliens with some promise of a golden age
> or some unimaginable deception to enslave undescerning minds.

Crow: They would've done that when they CREATED THEM!
Mike: Calm down, Crow. Remember, it's not real! He's making this up!
Crow: Then why tell us?
Mike: Because he's suffering Delusions of Grandeur.
Crow: Oh no! Now you sound like "Star Wars"! AAAGH!
<Mike leans back>
Mike: Are you happy, Pearl? You're driving my bots insane!
<An evil laugh echoes through the theater>
Crow & Tom: Oh no! She's everywhere! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!
<Crow & Tom hide>
Mike: C'mon guys, don't leave me here alone!

> The evidence
> seems to point to the latter. There have been many false messianic claims and
> those foolish enough to repeat history by following the voices of deceiving
> entities have been warned to "beware of false prophets and Christs who come
> disguised as sheep but underneath are ravenous wolves ".10

Mike: So Christ was really a wolf?
<Crickets chirp>
Mike: Guys? Where are you? C'mon, this isn't funny!
Crow: <Off Screen> Olly-olly oxen-free!
<Tom flies in fron the side twirling in the air and lands in his seat>
Tom: Hey, that was cool!
<Crow enters>
Crow: Hah! Found you!

> We should be
> reminded of the likes of Adolf Hitler who not long ago promised a New Age to
> unsuspecting Germans.

Crow: Geez, looks like we entered at a bad time.
Tom: <announcer voice> Adolf Hitler was a naughty, naughty man!

>
> - Whitley Striber, in a recent issue of the monthly MUFON Journal, Sept. 93,
> states - "I've come away from this experience convinced of one thing:

Mike: Bell-bottoms really were awesome and disco IS coming back into
style!

> if there
> aren't demons out there, there might as well be, because these guys are
> indistinguishable from demons.

Crow: Aliens work for Satan and possess the souls of little girls?
Mike & Tom: <singing> Oompa-loompa oompa-dee-dee!

> Indistinguishable.

Tom: I love that word, it ranks right up there with "cat" and "hat"

> To see them, to look into
> their eyes, is to be less - forever......."

Crow: And then he had a massive heart attack from too many dots in his
diet.

> Striber seems to swing from horror
> to naieve trust.. you see this in his books and statements to the public.
> Perhaps, he is not so sure of the visitor's intentions.

Mike: They want to sell us Amway products!

>
> - Perhaps we should heed the old warning; 'If, anyone says to you then, "Look,
> here is the Christ" or, "He is there", do not beleive it; for false Christ and
> false prophets will arise and produce great signs and portents, enough to
> deceive even the chosen , if that were possible."11

Tom: Oh Mr. Applegate! We need a false profit for someone to believe
in, wanna help?

>
> - Some UFO researchers suggest that perhaps the so called 'aliens' aren't much
> of a threat, after all if they have been around for this long and have not
> taken over then why should we be concerned.

Crow: Finally! A word of reason amidst chaos!

> However, if they are not what they
> appear to be, and the phenomena has other potientials and realities which
> include: deception, false messianic claims, dangerous ideologies, the formation
> of cults, etc., then for historical, social and political reasons we should not
> abandon our need for discernment and caution.

Mike: However, the key word in that inexplicably LONG sentance: "If"!

>
>
> Here are some great UFO quotes that shed light on the deceptive nature of
> the "alien" presence.

Tom: No! Please God, No! I won't profane christianity anymore! I
won't eat RAM Chips before dinnertime! I promise to wash my hands
before every meal, just please, no more of this!
Mike: Settle down, Tom, it's almost over.

>
> "But the UFO phenomenon simply does not behave like
> extraterrestrial visitors. It actually molds itself in order
> to fit a given culture."
> -John Ankerberg, The Facts on UFOs and Other Supernatural
> Phenomena, p. 10

Crow: <Reader> That's how far I got, before I found blank pages.

>
> "Human beings are under the control of a strange force that
> bends them in absurd ways, forcing them to play a role in a
> bizarre game of deception."

Tom: <Taylor> A society that worships the Atomic Bomb?

> -Dr. Jacques Vallee, Messengers of Deception, p. 20
>
> "We are dealing with a multidimensional paraphysical
> phenomenon which is largely indigenous to planet earth."
> -Brad Steiger,

Mike: <Brad> I love using big words to confuse people!

> [cited in] Blue Book Files Released in
> Canadian UFO Report, Vol. 4, No. 4, 1977, p. 20

Crow: Ah, a Canadian UFO Report?
Tom: <Canadian Voice> So, you just got abducted by a UFO, eh?
Mike: Maybe this would help explain "The Final Sacrifice".
Crow: Mike, nothing can help explain that movie.

>
>
> "One theory which can no longer be taken very seriously is
> that UFOs are interstellar spaceships."
> -Arthur C. Clarke, New York Times Book Review, 07/27/75

Mike: Gee, Mr. Clarke, we wouldn't know a thing about that, would we
guys?
Crow & Tom: Nope!
Crow: Well, maybe
Tom: Umm
Crow: Oh, I admit it! I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll!
Tom: I was the one who revealed the break-in at the Watergate Hotel!

>
> "There seems to be no evidence yet that any of these craft or
> beings originate from outer space."
> -Gordon Creighton, Official 1992 Flying Saucer Review Policy
> Statement

Crow: Ah, you see? It's "official" which means it needed approval by
someone most likely working for the government!
Mike: Crow, you are no Mulder.

>
> "A large part of the available UFO literature is closely
> linked with mysticism and the metaphysical. It deals with
> subjects like mental telepathy, automatic writing and
> invisible entities as well as phenomena like poltergeist
> [ghost] manifestation and 'possession.' Many of the UFO
> reports now being published in the popular press recount
> alleged incidents that are strikingly similar to demonic
> possession and psychic phenomena."
> -Lynn E. Catoe, UFOs and Related Subjects: USGPO, 1969;
> prepared under AFOSR Project Order 67-0002 and 68-0003

Mike: Gee, do you think Lynn is an Agnostic?

>
> "UFO behaviour is more akin to magic than to physics as we
> know it... the modern UFOnauts and the demons of past days
> are probably identical."
> -Dr. Pierre Guerin, FSR Vol. 25, No. 1, p. 13-14
Tom: Confused? Read the book!

>
> "The UFO manifestations seem to be, by and large, merely
> minor variations of the age-old demonological phenomenon..."

Crow: I think they want us to believe that demons are aliens . . .

> -John A. Keel, UFOs: Operation Trojan Horse, p. 299
>
>
> "Studies of flying saucer cults repeatedly show that they are
> part of a larger occult social world."

Mike: Known as "The Internet".

> -Stupple & McNeece, 1979 MUFON UFO Symposium Proceedings, p.
> 49
>
> "The 'medical examination' to which abductees are said to be
> subjected, often accompanied by sadistic sexual manipulation,

Crow: Oh no! The aliens are SADO-MASOCHISTS! Ugh! Ugh!

> is reminiscient of the medieval tales of encounters with
> demons.

Tom: <Announcer> And remember folks, in medival times, always keep it
sheathed! This has been a message from "Trojan".

> It makes no sense in a sophisticated or technical
> framework: any intelligent being equipped with the scientific
> marvels that UFOs possess would be in a position to achieve
> any of these alleged scientific objectives in a shorter time
> and with fewer risks."

Mike: Don't ask us, nothing makes sense here either.

> -Dr. Jacques Vallee, Confrontations, p. 13
>
> "The symbolic display seen by the abductees is identical to
> the type of initiation ritual or astral voyage that is
> imbedded in the [occult] traditions of every culture

Crow: <Writer> Hah! Fooled you! [occult] was put in there by me just
to make you think it was!

> ...the
> structure of abduction stories is identical to that of occult
> initiation rituals...the UFO beings of today belong to the
> same class of manifestation as the [occult] entities that
> were described in centuries past."
> -Dr. Jacques Vallee citing the extensive research of Bertrand
> Meheust [Science-Fiction et Soucoupes Volantes (Paris, 1978);
> Soucoupes Volantes et Folklore (Paris, 1985)], in
> Confrontations, p. 146, 159-161

Tom: I wonder if Jacques Vallee was ever abducted.
Mike: I don't think they wanted him . . .

>
> "[The occultist] is brought into intelligent communication
> with the spirits of the air, and can receive any knowledge
> which they possess, or any false impression they choose to
> impart...the demons seem permitted to do various wonders at
> their request."

Crow: *sigh* More demons. This writer must have really weird dreams at
night.

> -G.H. Pember, Earth's Earliest Ages and Their Connection with
> Modern Spiritualism and Theosophy (1876), p. 254
>
> "These entities are clever enough to make Strieber think they
> care about him. Yet his torment by them never ceases.
> Whatever his relationship to the entities, and he
> increasingly concludes that their involvement with him is
> something 'good,' he also remains terrified of them and
> uncertain as to what they are."

Mike: And if we met Strieber, that might mean something.

> -John Ankerberg, The Facts on UFOs and Other Supernatural
> Phenomena, p. 21
>
> "I became entirely given over to extreme dread. The fear was
> so powerful that it seemed to make my personality completely
> evaporate... 'Whitley' ceased to exist. What was left was a
> body and a state of raw fear so great that it swept about me
> like a thick, suffocating curtain, turning paralysis into a
> condition that seemed close to death...I died and a wild
> animal appeared in my place."

Crow: Yeah, they took my life, but the sex is GREAT!

> -Whitley Strieber, Communion, p. 25-26

Tom: Oh, this is the guy referred to in the previous paragraph! Gee,
he doesn't seem to think the aliens care about him . . .

>
> "Increasingly I felt as if I were entering a struggle that
> might even be more than life and death. It might be a
> struggle for my soul, my essence, or whatever part of me
> might have reference to the eternal. There are worse things
> than death, I suspected... so far the word demon had never
> been spoken among the scientists and doctors who were working
> with me...Alone at night I worried about the legendary
> cunning of demons ...At the very least I was going stark,
> raving mad."

Mike: This quote has been brought to you by H.P. Lovecraft.

> -Whitley Strieber, Transformation, p. 44-45

Mike: ...or Strieber, again.

>
> "I wondered if I might not be in the grip of demons, if they
> were not making me suffer for their own purposes, or simply
> for their enjoyment."

Crow: Oh boy, more demons again! Let me guess, Strieber?

> -Whitley Strieber, Transformation, p. 172

Crow: Ding!

>
> "I felt an absolutely indescribable sense of menace. It was
> hell on earth to be there [in the presence of the entities],
> and yet I couldn't move, couldn't cry out, couldn't get away.

Tom: Couldn't use my Visa! Couldn't get a decent parking space!
Couldn't ask for a raise!

> I'd lay as still as death, suffering inner agonies. Whatever
> was there seemed so monstrously ugly, so filthy and dark and
> sinister. Of course they were demons. They had to be. And
> they were here and I couldn't get away."

Crow: Demons? Nah, gotta be Strieber again!

> -Whitley Strieber, Transformation, p. 181

Crow: I'm two for two tonight guys, on a roll!

>
> "Why were my visitors so secretive, hiding themselves behind
> my consciousness. I could only conclude that they were using
> me and did not want me to know why...What if they were
> dangerous? Then I was terribly dangerous because I was
> playing a role in acclimatizing people to them."

Mike: Wanna take a guess again, Crow?
Crow: Hmm, it seems to difficult . . . Abian, no. _-_? No. Ah,
Strieber?

> -Whitley Strieber, Transformation, p. 96

Mike: Ding!

>
>
> 1. The Fellowship, by Brad Steiger. 2. Ibid pp. 47 3. Ibid pp. 185 4. The
> Messages Given To Me By The Extra-terrestials -Rael 5. Operation Trojan Horse-
> John Keel pp. 200-232 6. Dimensions- Dr. Jacque Vallee 7. Transformation The
> Breakthrough- Whitley Striber pp. 180, 240. 8. Messengers of Deception- Dr. J.
> Vallee. Last chapter. 9. UFO'S in the New Age- William M. Alnor , Baker Book
> House 1992. 10. Matthew 7:15-20 11. Matthew 24: 23-28, Luke 21, 1 John 2:18-23,
> 1 John 4:1-6, 1 Thess 2:1-12. 12. Teachings of the Pleadians- Bringers of the
> Dawn. 13. Understanding the New Age- Russell Chandler, Word Publishing, 1988.
> 14. Deuteronomy 18:9-22.

Tom: THANK GOD SOMEONE FINALLY EXPLAINED THOSE DAMN NUMBERS! WHY THE
HELL COULDN'T YOU HAVE TOLD US THIS EARLIER??????
Mike: Cool it, Tom! It's OVER!

>
> Highly recommended reading is "Alien Encounters" by Missler and Eastman.
> Goto.... www.alienencounters.com
>

Crow: I'd rather keep my sanity, thank you very much.

<M&TB exit the theater>

<*...1...2...3...4...5...6>

Mike: It's over, guys! We barely survived it, but we did!

Crow: <His voice is heavily shaken.> Mike, if I ever get stuck in
another rant as bad as this one, please shoot me. Just end it there! I
don't want to ever have to face another Alien rant again, do you hear
me?

Tom: Yeah, Mike. Even if it's another stupid X-Files fan-fic. That
also includes Star Wars, Clare Mosely especially; Star Trek, written by
you-know-who; and any other moronic science fiction story!

Crow: Tom, you just inspired me! Go fetch me my Asimov novels!

Mike: Crow, we don't hate anything that's good!

Crow: Mike, all science fiction is evil!

Mike: What about us then? Don't we seem like "science fiction"?

Crow: Well, not really, this is reality!

Mike: Didn't Asimov write about robots, space, and rockets?

Crow: I guess so.

Mike: And where are we right now, stuck with who, on what ship?

Crow: Umm, we're in space, with a man and a robot, and on the Satellite
of Love.

Mike: You see? We're similar to science fiction!

Crow: I see your point.

Tom: Here they are, Crow!

Crow: Oh, you can forget the books, Tom. Mike talked me out of it.

Tom: He did?

Crow: Yeah, he convinced me that not ALL science fiction is bad, just
the ones written by doves.

Mike: Well, everything except for the last part.

Tom: Oh, I see. Turning your back on me, eh?

Crow: No, not at all!

Tom: Come here, you!

Mike: Stop it! <turns to the camera> Yes, Mrs. Forrester?

<CF>

Pearl: Well, Nelster, after seeing your insane reaction in the theater
today, I decided to give it a try on another being, and decided to have
Braing Guy immobilize Bobo, replace the "Planet of the Apes" marathon
with today's post. Let's see his reaction.

Bobo: Gee, what's for dinner?

Pearl: Are you ok, Bobo?

Bobo: I think so, what was that thing you showed me?

Pearl: Oh forget it! You're an stupid baboon!

Bobo: Ape!

Pearl: Whatever. Go back to watching you "Planet of the Apes"
marathon.

Bobo: Okay, I'm almost done with the third movie, "Escape from the
Planet of the Apes", and let me tell you, that Dr. Zera is cute!

Pearl: I'd join him, but I've already seen them, and I remember the
ending to the third movie! <She pauses.> Uh-oh! Bobo! Stop the tape!

----

-----

> Many abductees
> report implants and feel they are being manipulated for some unknown purpose
> that's yet to be revealed.

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