<MiSTing> MMPR:TM- The Script [7/11]
TCurryFan
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<SOL- Theater>
> 55A EXT. DULCEA'S GARDEN / PHAEDOS - NIGHT 55A
>
> Dulcea leads the kids
MIKE: ...in a rousing version of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"!
'BOTS: Woo-hoo!
> through a circular opening in one
> wall, all of them look completely wiped out. She reaches an
> ornate doorway, faces the Rangers.
MIKE: <as Dulcea> AH! Why are you kids still following me?!
>
> DULCEA
> Each of you must reach deep
> within
ALL: Ewwww...
> and draw upon your natural
> instincts... Only then will you
> know the way of the Ninjetti.
> (beat)
> Rest for a few hours. We will
> continue at daybreak.
>
> She heads through the door.
>
> KIMBERLY
> So where are we supposed to
> sleep?
MIKE: With Tommy, as usual.
<TOM shudders>
>
> Snoggle points to the campfire.
>
> SNOGGLE
> Buhph nghujr.
>
> He pushes Kimberly toward it making a "Na na na na na"
TOM: Yes, you must get the giant "Nyah-nyah" of power...
MIKE: Watch _Tiny_Toons_ much, Tom?
> sound
> through his snout. He then hurries inside and SLAMS the door.
>
> KIMBERLY
> That guy's cruisin' for a
> bruisin'.
TOM: I'll hold him down!
MIKE: I'll hold Dulcea!
<the 'BOTS look at him>
MIKE: Ya know.. to keep her from interfering...
TOM: Of course...
>
> The kids approach the dying fire, all of them limping a
> little.
>
> BILLY
> I can hardly walk...
CROW: You've been busy with Adam, eh?
>
> AISHA
> I've never been this sore in my
> life.
MIKE: Look like SHE'S been busy with Adam, too!
>
> They drop around the fire, a few of them GROANING. They stare
> into the orange coals for a long moment, all of them looking
> disillusioned.
>
> BILLY
> Do you guys really think we can
> pull this off?
TOM: Nope.
MIKE: Not a chance.
CROW: You're dead.
>
> It takes a moment to get a response.
>
> ADAM
> Maybe if we had more time.
>
> TOMMY
> ... I wonder... We've been
> relying on our Morphin Powers for
> so long... maybe we've forgotten
> how to rely on ourselves.
TOM: Oh, that's _so_ deep...
>
> There's a somber silence.
>
> TOMMY
> We should get some rest.
>
> They all settle in for the night.
MIKE: <as random female Ranger> Hey, watch your hand!
TOM: <as Random Ranger> Ow, you're on my hair!
>
> 55B EXT. INNER CITY CONSTRUCTION SITE - NIGHT (OLD SC 47)
>
> A PURPLE HAZE
CROW: <singing> All through my brain!
> OF SMOKE has settled on the construction site.
> Suddenly, mysteriously, SWARMS OF ZOMBIFIED PARENTS
MIKE: <singing> In your he-eeeead, in your he-e-eead, Zooombie,
Zooombie, Zombie-ie-ie!
'BOTS: AH!
TOM: MIKE! Don't DO that!
> emerge from
> the vapors - We see Mr. Kelman amongst them.
>
> Ivan steps forward, followed by Goldar.
MIKE: Dumb and dumber!
>
> IVAN
> Ladies and gentlemen, Simon
> says... STOP!
>
> All the parents stop.
TOM: Red light!
MIKE: Green light!
>
> IVAN
> Simon says... stand on one foot!
>
> All the parents stand on one foot. Ivan seems to be taking a
> perverse glee in all this.
>
> IVAN
> Simon says...
TOM: ...make Saban lots of money!
>
> GOLDAR
> Quack like a'duck!
>
> All the parents start QUACKING LIKE DUCKS. Ivan slowly turns
> to Goldar, gives him an icy stare.
>
> GOLDAR
> It just slipped out.
MIKE: So, it was ok to have them stand on one leg, but NOT ok to
make them quack like ducks?
>
> Ivan turns back to the QUACKING parents.
>
> IVAN
> SHUT UP!!
>
> The parents keep quacking.
>
> GOLDAR
> You didn't say "Simon says".
>
> IVAN (irritated)
> Simon says SHUT UP!!!
TOM: I wish someone would say that to the movie!
>
> (they shut up)
> Now, as soon as I give the word
> I want all of you to start
> digging.
> (beat)
> Do I make myself perfectly --
>
> The zombie parents have already started going to work.
MIKE: Wait, I thought you had to say "Simon Says"! What gives?
TOM: You can't change the rules in the middle of the game!
CROW: Do-over! I call a do-over!
> Ivan
> shakes his head in exasperation.
>
> IVAN
> This is the Iast time I use
> parents for anything!
MIKE: <rapping> Take it from Ivan, parents just don't
understand.
>
> 55C EXT. DULCEA'S GARDEN / PHAEDOS - NIGHT 55C
>
> The Rangers are fast asleep. A night wind WHISTLES through
> the trees,
ALL: <start whistling the theme to _Andy_Grffith_>
> causing the branches to shiver.
TOM: The _branches_ are shivering? It MUST be COLD!
>
> After a moment, there's movement in the bushes.
MIKE: Kim! Tommy! Knock it off!
CROW: You too, Billy and Adam!
> Suddenly,
> amazingly, a WOLF emerges -- his mane glistening in the
> moonlight, his eyes GLOWING LIKE FIRE.
>
> He surveys the sleeping clan, moves straight toward Billy. He
> stands inches away from him, watches him with an intense gaze.
> Billy stirs slightly.
CROW <as Billy, dreaming> Oh, Adam.. No, we can't... The
others'll see us...
>
> The embers cast an orange glow on Kimberly's sleeping face
> A SHADOW moves over her and two CRANE LEGS step into frame.
>
> There's a FLURRY OF FLAPPING WINGS as a FALCON SWOOPS DOWN and
> lands on a rock directly above Tommy. The bird fixes on Tommy
> with its piercing eyes.
MIKE: And proceeds to peck at his liver.
TOM: Ewwwwwww...
>
> We hear a GRUNTING SOUND
CROW: Tommy and Kim are at it AGAIN?
> as the SILHOUETTE OF AN APE APPEARS:
>
> Now a FROG HOPS through the air and lands inches away from
> Adam. The frog sits there a moment, it's THROAT THROBBING
MIKE: For a kids' movie, this sure has a lot of sexual imagery!
>
> Now we hear a DEEP GROWL and a tree SHAKES. Aisha fidgets in
> her sleep as an ENORMOUS BEAR SHADOW FALLS OVER HER.
>
> Now, all at once, the six animals VANISH INTO THIN AIR LIKE
> SPIRITS OF THE NIGHT.
MIKE: Which is fitting, see as how they ARE spirits...
>
> 55D EXT. CONSTRUCTION SITE - NIGHT (PART OLD SC 55B) 55D
>
> Ivan and Goldar patrol the parents who are busy digging.
>
> IVAN
> Let's pick it up here! I've got
> a schedule to keep. In twenty
> four hours the ooze is gonna hit
> the fan!
ALL: EWWWWWW...
>
> Goldar suddenly point to the sky.
CROW: De plane! De plane!
>
> GOLDAR
> Hey, boss!
>
> THE TENGU DROPS INTO THE SCENE, SQUEALING
TOM: Ah'm gonna make you squeal like a pig!
>
> MORDANT
> What kind of landing was that?!
> These clowns are a menace to the
> sky
MIKE: And you're a menace to the ozone!
>
> IVAN
> How did you fare?
>
> Mordant waves Ivan off.
>
> MORDANT
> Oh, it couldn't've gone better.
MIKE: Well, actually, it could've...
> The Power Rangers didn't know
> what hit them .
>
> The Tengu appear, one of them SQUAWKS and makes grand
> gestures.
>
> MORDANT
> That's right. And then we threw
> one of them off a mountain and
> another one into a raqing river!
>
> IVAN
> So they've been destroyed?
>
> The Tengu SQUAWKS some more.
>
> MORDANT
> "Basically".
TOM: Suddenly, out of the blue, they start using quotes?
>
> IVAN
> What do you mean "basically"?
>
> MORDANT
> Well... we were about to finish
> them off... when this huge
> monster came out of nowhere!
MIKE: <as Mordant> It was cool! Just like that scene in
_Star_Wars_!
>
> MORDANT
> Okay, maybe he wasn't so huge.
> But you should've seen the size
> of his STICKS
CROW: OOOhhhhhh...
TOM: Sometimes a stick is just a stick.
>
> A pensive look comes over Ivan...
>
> IVAN
> Did these sticks make a whistling
> sound?
ALL: <make whistling sounds>
>
> MORDANT
> How'd you know?
>
> IVAN
> Dulcea!
MIKE: <singing> I just met a girl named Dulcea...
> (beat)
> That miserable, manipulating
> loathsome she-devil of a WITCH!!
>
> To help make the point Mordant SPITS on the ground.
>
> IVAN
> How could you let them get away?!
> If Dulcea leads them to the Great
> Power, everything will be ruined!
> They must be OBLITERATED!
>
> One of the Tengu SCREECHES again.
>
> MORDANT
> What're you talking about?! It
> wasn't my fault! You're the
> featherbrains that let them get
> away!
>
> Ivan looks up to the sky.
CROW: De pla-
MIKE: Stop.
>
> IVAN
> I call upon the Powers of
> Darkness to enrich the evil of my
> creatures by tenfold!
>
> LIGHTNING RIPS from the sky and ZAPS THE TENGU, CAUSING THEM
> TO GLOW RADIANTLY.
MIKE: As opposed to radiate glowingly.
>
> IVAN
> And now the coup de grace, to
> lead my tribe to victorious
> battle!
>
> He shoots a BOLT OF ENERGY AND CREATES THE OUEEN TENGU! She
> is a different color than the rest and her eyes GLOW RED.
> Mordant shakes his head in wonder.
>
> MORDANT
> Where does he come up with this
> stuff?
MIKE: Where does he get those wonderful toys?!
>
> The Queen spreads her wings and makes the most HORRENDOUS
> SCREECH imaginable.
MIKE: Ladies and gentlemen- Mariah Carrey!
>
> IVAN
> Queen Tengu, lead-your warriors
> to Phaedos, FEAST YOURSELVES UPON
> THE POWER RANGERS AND BRING ME
> DULCEA!
MIKE: <as Queen Tengu> How 'bout we feast upon Dulcea and bring
you the Power Rangers?
>
> Once again, the Tengu take to the sky like GIANT BATS.
>
> 55E EXT. LONG SHOT OF DULCEA'S COMPOUND - SUNRISE (MATTE)
>
> The morning sun bathes Dulcea's compound in a shimmering
> golden light.
MIKE: Which was radiantly glowing.
>
> 55F EXT. DULCEA'S COMPOUND - SUNRISE (OLD SC 55D) 55F
>
> CLOSE ON KIMBERLY
CROW: Is SHE bathing, too?
>
> Snoggle's snout works it's way toward her making SNORTING
> SOUNDS.
MIKE: Hey! Watch that snout- this is a kids' movie!
TOM: <as Kimberly> No, Tommy... Stop; I'm not in the mood this
morning...
>
> Kimberly bolts awake and SLAMS his snout with her fist. She
> YELPS LIKE A CHILD as he grips the protrusion and JUMPS
> UP AND DOWN.
ALL: YAAAAY!!
>
> SNOGGLE
> BUGHU PHUNGL MURHPUGNU!!!
>
> All the Rangers spring awake. As they get out from under
> their blankets they're shocked to discover that they're all
> wearing Ninjetti costumes with animal symbols on their chest.
MIKE: So, Dulcea snuck out and changed their clothes in the
middle of the night?
CROW: This lady needs a hobby!
TOM: Sounds like she already has one.
CROW: Good point.
>
> TOMMY
> How the heck?!...
>
> ROCKY
> What's going on?!
>
> KIMBERLY
> I don't believe it!
>
> Dulcea approaches, a wondrous expression on her face.
CROW: <as Dulcea> Bitchin' threads, dudes!
>
> DULCEA
> You have been visited by the
> animal spirits...
MIKE: <as Dulcea> IfyaknowwhatImean!
> they have given
> you their blessing.
>
> The Rangers continue to admire their symbols in silent wonder.
TOM: <as Adam> I'm a frog...
>
> 55G EXT. DULCEA'S GARDEN / PHAEDOS - MORNING (OLD SC 55E)
>
> MONTAGE
>
> HARD DRIVING MUSIC KICKS IN.
ALL: <singing> Sunshine and lollipops!
>
> 1. We see Aisha standing on a rock, her whole body flowing
CROW: What is she, liquid metal?
>
in
> a martial art exercise.
>
> 2. Billy and Dulcea continue to fight with whistling sticks.
> Billy is starting to get the hang of it. He hits Dulcea
> a few times, then she CLOBBERS him.
MIKE: <as nerd> Haha, he got beaten by a girl!
ALL: <childish laughter>
>
> 3. Kimberly balances along the bamboo log again. She does a
> FLIP and lands it, however one foot slips off and she
> struggles to maintain her balance.
TOM: <sports anonouncer voice> Oh, a slight wobble there; that's
gonna be half point deduction...
>
> 4. Tommy stands on the protruding rock again, spreads
ALL: AHH!
>
high
> like a falcon, SOARS THROUGH THE AIR. He gets about ten
> feet then DROPS INTO THE WATER.
TOM: <as Billy> Stop stealing my schtick!
>
> 5. Rocky climbs up the oriental pole -- this time he makes it
> up about FIFTEEN FEET before he slips. He only drops five
> feet.
MIKE: But since he's an octopus, he has three to spare.
>
> 6. Adam stands amidst overhanging trees and goes into his
> frog animal stance,
ALL: <chuckle>
MIKE: So, he's on all fours in the water?
> his entire being focused on his
> actions.
>
> 7. Billy stands off alone
MIKE: Lone wolf! Get it?!
> practicing with the whistling
> sticks. The weapons are now a BLURR in his hands.
>
> 8. Kimberly balances along the log, executes a FLIP, lands it
> perfectly, throws her arms up triumphantly.
MIKE: <as Kimberly> Eat my dust, Kerri Strug!
>
> 9. Adam stands on the lakeshore, concentrating on a buzzing
> insect. He strikes out at it, but just misses it.
TOM: Eh, it probably wouldn't have made much of meal anyway.
>
> 10. Aisha also does something appropriate.
MIKE: Oh, THAT'S specific.
>
> 55H EXT. ANGEL GROVE PARK - DAY (OLD SC 55F) 55H
>
> HUNDREDS OF KIDS AND TEENAGERS fill the park, all of them
> wearing PURPLE CLOTHES. They're all dirty and grunged out
CROW: I guess they're headed to Seattle.
> They jump around, breaking stuff, sparring with each other
> It's total pandemonium.
ALL: WOO-HOO!!
>
> Suddenly, an ERUPTION OF SMOKE -- and Ivan, disguised as the
> wizard, MAGICALLY APPEARS. The crowd CHEERS, Nuremburg style,
> fists raised.
MIKE: Are you ready to be merry?
'BOTS: YEEAAHH!!
>
> CROWD
> OOZE! OOZE! OOZE! OOZE!
>
> IVAN
> Thank you! Please! You're too
> kind.
> (sotto voce)
> Finally. a little appreciation
> where it's deserved.
>
> VOICE
> We love you Ivan!
MIKE: Oh, now that's going a BIT too far, don't you think?
>
> IVAN
> Right back at ya!-
> (he smiles)
> Now, WHO MISSES SCHOOL?!
MIKE; <raising hand> Oh, oh, oh!
TOM: You would, Nelson...
>
> CROWD
> NOT US!
>
> IVAN
> AND WHO MISSES RULES?!
CROW: I... kinda do, actually...
>
> CROWD
> NOT US!
>
> IVAN
> AND WHO WANTS TO JOIN ME IN
> RAISING HELL ACROSS THE
> UNIVERSE?!
CROW: Can we skip the raising hell and just get straight to the
orgy?
MIKE: CROW!
>
> CROWD
>
> WE DO!
>
> At the edge, Fred discreetly approaches Bulk and Skull.
>
> FRED
> Can I have a word with you guys?
TOM: <as Groucho Marx> Say the secret woid and collect 500
hundred dollars.
> (he pulls them aside)
> What's really going on here?!
> Where are everybody's parents?
>
> Bulk and Skull exchange a look.
MIKE: Bulk!
TOM: Skull!
<Crow does romantic music>
>
> SKULL
> Like we said before, that's
> classified, top secret...
>
> Fred decides to be tricky.
TOM: Oh, like you have to be tricky to outwit these two
morons...
>
> FRED
> Look, Ivan wants me to go dump a
> load of garbage all over them.
>
> BULK
> Well, why didn't you say so?!
MIKE: You didn't ask.
>
> SKULL
> They're at the World Center
> Construction Site.
MIKE: <as Bulk> Oh, Great, Skull, you sang like a bird!
>
> Fred nods.
>
> FRED
> Uh. OOZE RULES!
>
> He does a ridiculous mock salute. Bulk and Skull repeat it.
>
> BULK AND SKULL
> OOZE RULES !
>
> Fred rolls his eyes and hurries away.
MIKE: <as Fred> Dorks.
>
> 56 thru 57A OMITTED
>
> 58 EXT. JUNGLE / PHAEDOS - MORNING 58
>
> Dulcea leads Snoggle and the Rangers up a stone path. They
> approach a bush filled with exotic berries. All of them start
> eating the berries.
MIKE: But the berries turn out to be poisonous, so they all die.
>
> TOMMY
> Dulcea... how do you and Zordon
> know each other?
MIKE: <as Dulcea> Oh, I don't think you're quite old enough for
that, kids...
>
>
> Dulcea reminisces.
TOM: Oh, God...
CROW: Wake me up when something interesting happens.
TOM: So, you mean, when the movie's over?
CROW: Yep.
>
> DULCEA
> We belonged to an interstellar
> Peace Keeping Force known as the
> "Order of the Meledan".
MIKE: The Order was ham on rye.
> (beat)
> Zordon was widely regarded as the
> finest Commander in the Galaxy.
> He was a true Legend... If it
> wasn't for him, the Universe
> would be a very different place
> from what it is today.
MIKE: You say that as if it's a bad thing...
>
> The kids are overwhelmed by what they're hearing.
>
> ROCKY
> So... what happened?
>
> DULCEA
> Over time our enemies were
> defeated... I returned to
> Phaedos, Zordon moved on to
> continue the struggle elsewhere.
TOM: Washington, D.C.
> (beat)
> Until you kids showed up, I
> hadn't heard from him for
> centuries.
MIKE: <as Dulcea, tearfully> He never writes! He never calls!
That heartless BASTARD!
>
> The Rangers are silent for a moment.
>
> DULCEA
> He was always an inspiration...
CROW: <as Dulcea> If you KNOW that I mean!
>
> Dulcea speaks with grim-visaged intensity.
>
> DULCEA
> This is why I'm taking you to the
> Nathadian Monolith. That is why
> I'm teaching you the Ninjetti.
CROW: I thought she was doing that to have an excuse to beat up
on them.
TOM: Well, that, too.
> (beat)
> If Zordon dies... then a piece of
> all of us dies... and the force
> of good within the Universe will
> be dealt an irreparable blow.
>
> These words strike deep in the kids.
MIKE: Injuring them all severely.
<Commercials>
"Did anything about that seem strange to you?"
-Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones), _Men_in_Black_
Catherine Johnson ---------- MiSTie #75,125 ---------- TCur...@aol.com