Generations 2 MSTing, Part 2 (LONG! REALLY LONG!)

[Merritt Stone]

Here's part 2. It's NOT my fault! Feedback address is
dhi...@kruncher.ptloma.edu.

Actually, the margins are my fault, sorta.

> Gather as
>much scientific data as possible. The rest of us," Marrissa's eyes
scanned the
>room. "will enter the Nexus in the Kul'pla. Questions?"

TOM: [as random briefing participant] Yeah! Why don't YOU be the
guinea
pig for one of these missions!

> "What will we encounter within the Nexus?" this from Riker.

MIKE: [as Marrissa] Clean hair for a lower price!

> "Previous reports indicate that you enter an environment tailored to suit
>your personality,

CROW: Riker probably won't be allowed to go in, then.

> rather like a holodeck program. Once inside, we have to stay
>in contact, or we lose the feel of reality."
> "Damned cockamamie idea if ever I heard one!" said Captain Charlesworth.

TOM: Hey, it's Popeye!

> The assembled officers grinned in agreement and at the old Captain's quaint
>verbiage.

MIKE: The assembled human and 'bots grimaced in nausea and at Pasch's
sad
idolization of a bad fanfic writer.

>
> The Vor'kis sped towards the Nexus on half impulse. On the bridge, tension
>was beginning to mount.

CROW: This is no time for Jenga!

>
> "The shields aren't modulating! What's wrong?" Lieutenant-Commander Townley
>stepped towards Vesch and looked over her shoulder. That's not the
correct..."
> His voice was cut off by the ship's computer.
> "WARNING! WARNING! Shield failure imminent." The voice was gruff, the computer
>repeating the message in both Klingon and English.

TOM: Hmmm. I guess the Supreme Court did find that it was
unconstitutional
for English to be the official language.

>
> From the bridge of the Endeavour, the Vor'kis appeared to implode. The
>warp core in the centre of the ship went critical, vaporising most of
the vessel.
>Fragments of hull spun away into the uncaring void.

CROW: And hopefully, into Marrissa.
MIKE: Oh, it's always the Romulan's fault in these stories.
TOM: Well, Marrissa doesn't like Romulans, so...

>
> Marrissa turned away from the viewscreen of the Kul'pla, nauseated by the
>loss of the crewmembers.
> "It didn't work!" she exclaimed, frustrated.

MIKE: Well, Troi's not there, so *someone* has to state the obvious.

> "It would be senseless to attempt our original plan with this vessel."
>stated Data. Marrissa agreed.

CROW: Can we kill just Marrissa then?

> "Can the communicators be set to transmit from within the Nexus?" she
>enquired.
> "I believe so." said Data, simply.

TOM: [as Data] Simply press that "Ratliffian Plot Contrivance" button.

> "Then make it so." said Marrissa.
> "Hey, wait a minute!" exclaimed Riker.

MIKE: [as Riker] I just realized that you're not supposed to order me
around!

> "How do you expect us to get inside
>the Nexus? You saw what happened to the Vor'kis!"
> "There will be no us. I intend to be beamed alone directly into the path of
>the Nexus."

CROW: Hopefully with no space suit.

> "Madness!" Captain Charlesworth burst out.

TOM: Looks like Charlesworth shares our opinion about these stories.

> "No." said Data. "Records indicate that Captain Kirk survived being sucked
>into space when the Nexus hit the Enterprise-C."

MIKE: Which was fairly easy, since he was never on the Enterprise-C.
CROW: Oh, Anne-Lise obviously means the Enterprise-B...
MIKE: And who were you calling a fan boy, Crow?
CROW: D'oh!

> "I volunteer to accompany you." said Jay.
> "Me too." said Clara.

TOM: Oh yes, let us all have an explosive decompression, and then...

> "Just us three, then." said Marrissa, noticing Riker about to speak. "As
>Mission Commander, I wont be responsible for any other lives."
> "As you wish." said Riker, wearing an expression of obvious distaste.

MIKE: It's sort of like "The Princess Bride", but he doesn't like her.
CROW: Can you blame him?

>
> Marrissa awoke from the darkness. She could still remember the biting
>chill of space in that brief millisecond before she blacked out,
before she
>came... here. She looked about her, and recognised the Enterprise.
She was
>inside a Jeffries tube, and people were running past. Suddenly, there
was
>nothing more natural in the world than to be here. She was being
hunted by
>the Enterprise security. Why? She tried to think. Of course, it was
an
>exercise to test the readiness of the cadets.

TOM: And then she fell into the pool of strawberry juice, and knew she
was
in heaven.

> She climbed out of the tube
>and entered ten-forward. She sat down, taking a book out of a pocket.
She
>was just about to begin reading when a woman stepped in front of her.
> "I don't know you." said the stranger.

MIKE: [as stranger] May I see some ID?

> "I'm Marrissa Amber Picard, head of the Kid's crew, Acting Ensign."

CROW: Hey, she forgot the Flores...

> The woman laughed, annoying Marrissa.

TOM: Now Marrissa knows how we feel.

> "You're no more a kid than I am!" she stated. Suddenly the scene around her
>shifted, and she was on a dry, arid planet.
> "What did you ju..."
> The woman cut her off with a wave of her hand.

MIKE: I'm falling in love with this stranger. She can annoy Marrissa
and
shut her up.

> "Watch!" she said. Suddenly, a large cube appeared in the sky. Marrissa
>recognised it immediately as a Borg ship.
> "I see this every day."

CROW: [as stranger] We don't get cable.

> said the woman. "My name's Guinan, and you're in
>the Nexus. You can be anywhere, anywhen here.

TOM: Put her in a theatre and force her to read Ratliff, Guinan!

> The Nexus protects its
>occupants, prevents illness,

MIKE: ...removes unsightly moles, ...
CROW: ...regrows hair, ...
TOM: ...and makes 13 different varieties of julien fries! Now how much
would you pay? DON'T ANSWER YET!

> keeps you happy by attempting to cater for your
>every wish. Eventually, you realise that your wish is simply to
leave.

MIKE: [as Guinan] And, um, it won't grant that one...

> Can
>you imagine what its like, living for an eternity, constantly feeling
>joyful?

ALL: [shouting] NO!

> I'm forced to having to make myself want to see this," Guinan waved
>towards the Borg ship, "just to keep myself sane. This place must be
>destroyed."

CROW: Well, it has already been destoryed.
MIKE: Guys, this is *not* Ratliff!

> "Do you have any idea how?" asked Marrissa.

TOM: [gasp!] Marrissa isn't coming up with all the ideas! I guess this
isn't Ratliff!

> "Yes, there's an Engineer here, called Morak. He was on the same refugee
>ship I was. He believes that if you could somehow alter the path of
the
>Nexus to pass into a sun, it would be destroyed."

MIKE: [as Marrissa] Morak?! Sounds Romulan. I don't trust him.

> "Okay." said Marrissa. "How many others are there here?"
> "Including you and your friends, nine."
> Marrissa mentally kicked herself for having forgotten her friends. Still,
>they would be unharmed.

CROW: She kicks herself each time she forgets others. That explains
her
current stupor.
MIKE: There are only nine people in the Nexus?
TOM: This sounds more like a new NBC comedy than the Nexus.

> "I'll do my best." said Marrissa, her eyes reflecting nothing but grim
>determination.
>
> "Marrissa to Enterprise." Marrissa tapped her comm-badge.
> "Riker here, go ahead Marrissa."
> "I've spoken with a woman claiming to be Guinan. She believes that if you
>can alter the path of the Nexus to pass through a star, it would be
>destroyed."

TOM: [as Riker] We can't destroy a star, Marrissa!
MIKE: OK, so Anne-Lise bears some resemblance to Ratliff.

> "We read you." Riker turned to Data. "Analysis, Mr. Data."
> "Intriguing concept. The path of the Nexus was changed before by destroying
>stars along its path."
> "Not exactly a viable prospect, Data. Any alternatives?"

CROW: [as Data] But Marrissa wants us to destroy stars, sir.

> "It may be possible to direct the Nexus by the creation of static warp
>bubbles around it, which would act like walls to channel it."
> "How do we go about doing that?" asked Riker.

TOM: [as Data] Don't worry about it, sir. I'll handle the
technobabble.

> "It would mean using two ships flying on each side of the Nexus. Our
>shields have the capability to be modified to that end.

MIKE: How conveeenient!

> The Enterprise has
>an existing configuration in its data banks, and the cloaking device
on the
>Kul'pla could be easily modified to create bubbles."

CROW: Wouldn't it be easier to use it's *warp* drive to make *warp*
bubbles?

> "What existing configuration?" asked Riker, mystified.
> "It was originally intended as metaphasic shielding." said Data. "Geordi
>originally programmed it from notes made by Dr. Crusher."

TOM: [sarcastic] Oh, that's going to inspire confidence in *everyone*!

> "Well," said Riker, "I've never known anything of Geordi's to go wrong yet!"

MIKE: [as Riker] Except his love life, and the weekly failures of the
holodeck.
CROW: ... and those two are related..

> "However, this plan would mean us having to fly almost into the star's
>corona and probably into it.

TOM: [as Riker] Good, we missed the kegger earlier.

> We should survive, as we have metaphasic
>shielding, but the Klingon ship will not."

MIKE: [as Data] And I'm sure the Klingons wouldn't mind sacrificing
one
of their ships for nine of our people.

> "Why do we have to fly so close to the star?"
> "Basically, we are trying to push the Nexus sideways, as soon as we pull
>away, the Nexus will continue on its original course.

TOM: It's stubborn that way.

> I suggest putting a
>skeleton crew on the Kul'pla, and keeping a constant transporter lock
on
>the crew members, ready to beam them back before hitting the star's
corona."
> "Can't we control the Klingon vessel remotely?" Riker asked.
> "No sir. Our systems are incompatible. Maybe if we had more time..." Data
>gave a very human shrug and Riker smiled in response.

CROW: [as Riker] It's the Klingon's fault for using Macintosh... oh
well...

> "Okay Data, we run with your plan.
>
> "Marrissa to the Endeavour." she called out, touching her comm-badge.
> "Endeavour here. Doctor Johnson is on standby to recieve casualties."

MIKE: With Marrissa in charge, that HAS to be his usual state.

>Lieutenant Patterson's voice was barely audible through the waves of
static.
> "Nine to beam up, engage when ready" Marrissa said.

CROW: [as Patterson] Alright, but I have to do my laundry, clean the
bridge, and play a game of chess first. Did I mention my taxes?

>
> "Patterson to Bridge." Supra's voice came out over the intercom, startling
>the commanding officer.

TOM: Whoever was in command. Anne-Lise forgot...

> "This is the Bridge, go ahead."
> "I have a problem getting a transporter lock, I can only get a partial lock
>on seven of the nine life forms, with a possible eighth."

CROW: Wow. They can beam aboard parts of eight people.
MIKE: C'mon Crow, we're almost done. Come back from the darkness.

> "We're running out of time. Attempt to beam aboard all that you can."

TOM: [as Patterson, sarcastic] Thanks sir, wouldn't have known to do
that
without you telling me, *sir*!
CROW: That's why *he's* the boss... right under Marrissa.

> Patterson activated the transporter controls, and glanced nervously at the
>pads. Seven forms materialised, and she was glad to see that Clara
and Jay
>were among them. Then she noticed that Marrissa wasn't.

MIKE: Then she went from glad to delirious with glee.
CROW: I always thought Patterson was a guy...
MIKE: It's hard to tell with Ratliff's alleged continuity.

> Feverishly, she
>worked at the controls, but it was no good. The other two patterns
were
>shifting too rapidly to get even a partial lock. She looked up into
Jays
>eyes, and replied to his silent question with a shake of her head.

TOM: Even Anne-Lise is getting tired of the dialogue!

>
> The Enterprise under the guidance of Captain Riker and the Kul'pla under
>the Captainship of Jay Gordan maneuvered into position on either side
of of
>the Nexus. At a signal from the Enterprise, the cloaking device on
the
>Kul'pla partially activated, blurring the ship. The Enterprise too
was only
>partially visible through its metaphasic shielding. Between the two
vessels,
>the Nexus thrashed about like a caged beast. Slowly, the two vessels
edged
>towards the Benecian sun. The hearts of the Captains on both ships
were
>heavy, knowing that by this action they were consigning a mutual
friend to
>death.

MIKE: They were going to miss having an extra Guinan around...

>
> Marissa stood on the bridge of the Enterprise, and ordered Alexander to
>score 'I lost to a bunch of kids' onto the Cardassian vessel.
Marrissa
>internally basked in a moment of triumph. She had almost single-
handedly
>stopped a threat to the Federation, however slim, and now she was on
a
>personal high. The viewscreen changed from showing Alexander's
Calligraphic
>handwriting and flickered into the form of a Cardassian. It was at
this
>moment when Marrissa's world exploded.

CROW: Thus ending the Ratliff clip show.
ALL: [cheer]

>
> The Nexus, trapped between the subspace fields generated by the Enterprise
>and the Kor'pla, plunged into the star's corona.
> "Transfer complete." informed Lieutenant Supra from the transporter room, a
>scant few seconds before the Kul'pla exploded. Riker merely nodded in
>response.

TOM: Wait, where is Supra? It said earlier that he-slash-she was on
the
Enterprise, but then he-slash-she beamed up Jay, and he was on the
Klingon
ship with the changing name that just blew up.
MIKE: Hold together, Tom, ol' buddy! Make us proud of you!

> "How are the shields holding up?" he enquired.
> "Shields at sixty percent and holding." stated Data, calm as usual.
> "Okay then, take us out." As the Enterprise banked upwards and headed out
>of the Corona, only Deanna caught the tear in Riker's eye.

CROW: [making a ripping sound, then as Riker] AAAARRRGGGHHH!!! My
eye!!
TOM: You think Deanna would be happy with not being in this fanfic
much.
MIKE: Suddenly, we're back in "Star Trek: Episode 666"!
ALL: [shudder]
CROW: Oh wait, that's "tear" as in he's crying!

> "Jay, you have the bridge." Riker headed into the ready room.

MIKE: Are you sure that's a good move? Remember what happened to the
last
bridge he had...

>
> Bloodleblip.

CROW: Hey! Not in the ready room either!

> "Come!" called out Riker, just settling into the Captain's chair." Deanna
>stepped into the room.
> "Will, I've known you..."

CROW: Biblically?
MIKE: Ordinarily, I'd chastise you, but Marrissa's dead, so...
TOM: C'mon, Mike, you know it's not going to last!
MIKE: Servo, if you were human, you'd know that we need to clutch to
dreams to survive sometimes.

> Riker cut her off with a wave of his hand.
> "I know, Deanna. Marrissa deserved a lot more than that, but what else
>could I have done? I had no choice. The good of the many..."

CROW: [as Riker] ...is served with Marrissa dying.

> "Far outweigh the good of the few." Deanna continued. "Yes, I don't blame
>you for your course of action, and neither will anybody else. Not
even
>Jean-Luc. Yes, I can tell that is what's bothering you. You feel that
you've
>betrayed his trust. But as you say, what else could you have done?"

TOM: Killed her sooner.

> Riker sighed, annoyed at himself. Feelings of guilt pervaded him, gripping
>him in a mental fugue. Stop it, he thought. You're a starfleet
officer. Do
>your duty.

MIKE: [as Riker] What is my duty? Bag Deanna? That's what I usually do
at
times like this...

> "Deanna, I leave it to you to prepare the eulogy." he said.
>
> "She was not a woman you could forget." Riker's last words were still
>echoing in Clara's mind as she sat on the bed in her quarters. The
door
>chimed.

CROW: He had to leave it to Ms. Sensitive to come up with something
nice
to say about Marrissa.

> "Enter." she called, sitting upright. Jay entered the room, a somber
>expression on his face. Clara relaxed again.

TOM: [as Jay] Um... Clara... now that Marrissa's gone, I was
wondering...

> "I should have been there, with her, in the Nexus." he declared.
> "Then you would be dead too." stated Clara, logical as always.

MIKE: [as Clara] Then *I'd* be in command! NYAHAHAHA!!!

> "I'll always regret not being with her" Jay said, vaguely.
> "She died in the line of duty. Its the way she'd have wanted it." Clara
>scowled at the cliched sound of her voice. "There's nothing any of us
could
>have done. Will you join me in a drink?"

CROW: Ah, they're going to use that "Pool of Lipton Tea" program in
the
holodeck.

> Jay nodded, and walked over to the replicator. He ordered two drinks and
>came back with the glasses, passing one to Clara. She took it from
him, and
>saw his expression.

TOM: [as Jay]: AAARRRGGHH!!!!! Strawberry juice!!!!
MIKE: [as Clara]: Computer, remove any program mentioning the word
"strawberry" from the replicator files.

> "You were more deeply in love with her than you thought, weren't you?"
> Jay gave a barely perceptible nod. "Yes, I realised too late."
> Clara held up her glass. "To Marrissa, a good Captain and friend"
> "Yes." said Jay. "A good friend."

CROW: ... but a horrible lead character for a series of bad fanfics.

>
> The Nexus died. In every known continuum, the rippling band of energy was
>fading out of existence. Inside, Marrissa screamed as she was caught
within
>the maelstrom of power, buffetted on all sides.

TOM: Now she knows how the rest of the Kids Crew felt.

> "Home!" she cried, willing only to be free of the Nexus's grip. The Nexus,
>existing in all dimensions and time frames, released her as per her
wishes,
>its last act before dying.

MIKE: So she either asphyxiated in space, or burned up in a star.

>
> As the Nexus began to fade, Guinan stared into the raging heart of a star.
>Myriad colours played about her eyes as the ribbon of energy flailed
about.
>Her last thoughts were of her impending freedom, and strangely she
smiled as
>she was willingly consumed by the Sun's heat.

TOM: Should we be seeing this?

>
> Marrissa blinked as the kaleidoscope of colour cleared from her vision.
>Pastoral fields stretched out before her, and the sky was a perfect
blue.
>The single, yellow orb of the Earth's sun was just reaching its
zenith.
>Laughing, Marrissa walked towards a rocky outcropping and peered over
the
>edge. Immediately she sobered.

MIKE: She was beginning to get strawberry DTs.

> Below her, down the hillside she was standing
>on, a group of neanderthals, wielding knives and spears, ran in a
group
>chasing after a creature she identified as something approximating a
horse.
>She gasped, realising that she was stranded on Earth thousands of
years
>before she was even born.

ALL: [hum Gilligan's Island theme song]

> "My dear Amber, there's no need to despair." With a start, Marrissa turned
>around at the sound of a voice behind her. With a sob of relief, she
hugged
>the newcomer.

CROW: [as Marrissa] That is Marrissa Amber Flores Picard! Never
forget!
TOM: Newcomer? It's a Marrissa-Alien Nation crossover!
MIKE: Wait, it's not capitalized... then again, this is in Ratliff
continuity...

> "Well!" said Q, draping an arm over her shoulder. "After all our
>stimulating chats, I couldn't just let you stay here. Think of the
waste!"

CROW: [as Q] I do want Jean Luc to suffer, you know...

> Marrissa's smile mirrored Q's own, as they both disappeared in a bright
>flash of white light.

TOM: Too bad it's not like the ending flash of light in "Star Trek:
The
Motion Picture".
MIKE: You mean where they're never seen again?
TOM: Exactly!
CROW: But I like Q!

>
>
>THE END.
>

TOM: We made it!
MIKE: Let's go, guys...

(1...2...3...4...5...6...SOL Control Room)

CROW: Well, it wasn't quite Ratliff, but it was bad...
GYPSY: Alright boys, it's time to get funky!
MIKE: Gypsy, never use the word "funky" again.

(Condition Yellow lights up. Gypsy zooms off to the bridge with the
others
following.)

MIKE: Gypsy, give me Rocket #9!

(The Hexfield lights up, showing the Nexus.)

TOM: (as Spock) Captain, sensors show that the phenomenon is on a
direct
course for... (normal voice) I don't believe it!
CROW: Let me see! Wow! It's going straight for Deep 13!

[D13]

FORRESTER: What the --?! AAAAGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

[Not D13, but still obviously low budget]

FRANK: I'll be good, Clay-- I mean, Dr. Forrester!
FORRESTER: Frank, what are you doing here?
GUINAN: I don't know you... you're new...
FORRESTER: Where is this? Why is Frank here? Is that Dr. Eckhardt over
there? Wait a minute... Mommy, is that you?
GUINAN: None of this is real... here...

(Co-conspirator mads disappear leaving Guinan and Forrester under
attack
by the Borg)

GUINAN: I watch this every day to stay sane...
FORRESTER: Got any popcorn?
GUINAN: Wait! This isn't supposed to be entertaining! Let's try
this...

(Planet disappears as what we see as obvious split screen technology
produces many, many Mikes, Crows and Tom Servos.)

MMs, Cs & TSs: Ah-ha-ha-ha! Staying alive... staying alive...
FORRESTER: NOOOO!!!! Make it stop!
GUINAN: It's for your own good!
FORRESTER: No!!!! I want to go home!!!! I want to push the button!!!!

-- POOF! --

Mystery Science Theater 3000 and its related characters and
situations are trademarks of and [c] 1994 by Best Brains, Inc. All
rights reserbed. Use of copyrighted and trademarked material is for
entertainment purposes only; no infringement on the original
copyrights
or trademarks held by Best Brains, Inc. is intended or should be
inferred.
This article is not, nor should be treated as, a personal attack on
Ms.
Pasch, Stephen Ratliff, or Romulans.

>For her, time had no meaning. All time was one time, and the weighty
>depression of that fact was enough to suffuse her contentment with
the
>clouds of despair. A tear escaped the confines of one eye, and she
looked
>away towards the ground, crushed by her need to help and her
inability to
>render assistance.

--
Merritt Stone, MSTie #54420
ratmm's Resident Utility Infielder
"You're the nicest guy in Hollywood. You're...Cary Grant and Jimmy
Stewart rolled into a great big ball. Not that... that's ever
happened..."
---Brain, "Brain's Song" (Pinky and the Brain)