MSTING: Musings of an X-feminist 3 and 4
Caitlin
Servo: Clearly, the second fanfic was *MUCH* worse.
Mike: I beg to differ.
Servo: Oh, really?
Mike: Yes.
Servo: Prove it.
Mike: Well, point one, "And We'll Always Have Love" featured Mulder
*hitting* Scully.
Servo: Counterpoint, "As the Flame Burns Out" featured Scully
*killing* Mulder. You'd have me believe that hitting is *worse*
than killing?
Mike: Conceded. But, at least Mulder didn't tell Scully "It's all my
fault that you shot me."
Servo: He probably would have if his head wasn't *riddled* with bullets!
Mike: Ok, I think we need an impartial arbiter, here-Crow!
[Crow enters, wearing a pink ribbon tied into a bow on his nest.]
Crow: Hello boys!
Servo: Uh...Crow? Are you feeling OK there buddy?
Crow: Oh, just peachy.
Servo: Well then.
Mike: We were wondering if you would settle a bet for us.
Servo: Yeah. Which of those two fanfics was worse?
Crow: What do you mean? I thought they were both great.
Mike: Huh?
Servo: Are you kidding?
Crow: Of course not! Why ever since Mike reprogrammed me to be a female-
Servo: WHAT?!
Crow: I've had a new appreciation for MSR fanfic. It's so romantic...
Mike: I did no such thi-uh, well, yeah, I guess I did.
Servo: Mike!
Mike: Well, he didn't say that's what he was doing!
Crow: Anyway, I'm a girl now, and we're all just going to have to deal
with that.
[the light flashes and Mike hits it]
Crow: You can call me Croweena.
Mike: Ummm...no, actually, I can't.
[commercials-Watch Sliders! If you're a masochist.]
[Mike enters the theater carrying Servo. Crow's nowhere to be found.]
Servo: So Crow's a girl now?
Mike: I guess so. We'll have to be sensitive to him.
Servo: (panicked) Does that mean I'll have to stop leaving the seat up?
Mike: Just relax.
>
>
>From: Dr_Dan...@webtv.net (Lexie)
Mike: Wait a minute...this Scully woman's a DOCTOR?
Servo: Only when it's convenient, apparently.
>Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 22:29:02 -0500 (CDT)
[Crow enters the theater]
Crow: Sorry, guys, I just had to touch up my makeup.
Servo: Do we still have to be sensitive?
Mike: Still.
>Subject: Family Secrets I:Announcement (1/2)
>
Servo: This is only part one half?
Crow: Now how could it part one half?
Mike: Maybe it's like a quarter bathroom
Crow: That's good, Mike. Pick a joke that 5,999,999,998 people will get.
Servo: That would mean that one of us doesn't get it.
Crow: I call it's you!
Servo: I call it's you!
>
>Title: Family Secrets I: Announcement (1/2)
>Author: Lexie
>Category: UST, it will turn into a romance later in the series
>Spoilers: none for this part
Mike: That's because this fanfic is loaded with preservatives.
>Feedback: Oh, yes please. I need to know that this series is worth
>finishing.
Crow: Pass. Next!
> send it to Dr_Dan...@webtv.net
>Distribution: just let me know
>Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully, Skinner and anyone else you recognize are
>not mine, but Danielle Riley is all mine.
Mike: What's that smell?
Crow: That's the stench of author insertion.
Servo: I wouldn't have thought it would smell like broccoli...
> Summary: Mulder and Scully get
>an announcement that will change everything.
Servo: In other news, the FBI announced today that it would no longer let
total nut jobs work in the basement.
>******************************************************
>J. Edge Hover Building
Crow: Oh, damn. She ruined my vacuum joke.
>X-file's department
>2:30pm
>
> "Yes, Sir. We'll be right there." Special Agent Dana Scully assured
>the person on the other end of the phone. Laying the phone in its
>cradle, She look at her partner and said "Mulder, that was
>Skinner. He wants us in his office immediately."
Servo: (Scully) I think he finally found out that we blew the entire
year's budget on the flashlights.
> "What did we do now?" he teased.
> "I don't think that you did anything" she stressed teasing him back
>"He just said it was important."
Mike: (Scully) and to bring whip cream.
>The trip to the AD's office was made in silence, each thinking about
>what Skinner could want. When they got there, the secretary ushered them
>right into the inner office. Walter Skinner stood up as they walked in
>and gestured to the two chairs in front of his desk.
>"Agents."
Crow: Noooo, those are *chairs*.
Mike: In his defense, with Scully it might be hard to tell...
> "Sir, you wanted to see us?" Mulder asked, trying to get Skinner to
>tell them why.
Servo: Mulder is a brilliant strategist.
> "Yes, I did" He answered sitting
>back down in his leather desk chair.
Mike: His rich Corinthian leather desk chair.
> "I just got news that you are
>going to be assigned another partner." Both agents quickly looked at
>the other, shock written on their faces.
Mike: You know, they're going to regret getting those tattoos.
>"Another partner." Mulder managed to get out.
> "The Director thought that with your case load another partner would be
>a benefit" Skinner explained.
>"You mean someone to do the work Agent Scully didn't. Debunk the
>X-files." Mulder said through closed teeth, clearly upset.
Crow: Hey, Mulder's a ventriloquist!
Servo: Does that make Scully his dummy?
Mike: It would explain a *lot*.
>"Mulder, that couldn't be farther from the truth.
Crow: (Skinner) Well, maybe it could be, like, *one* inch farther from
the truth.
> If anyone could help
>distinguish the X-files,
Servo: And believe me, you *need* help with that...
> it is Agent Riley." He said.
>"Agent Danielle Riley?" Scully, who had been silent up until this point,
>asked.
Mike: (Scully) Of the New Bedford Riley's?
> Mulder quickly turned his head and looked her.
Mike: "Family Secrets", directed by Steven Spielburg.
Servo: Coming soon to a theater near you.
> Skinner nodded his head.
>"I've heard of her.
Crow: (Scully) Her name is on all the bathroom walls.
> She is a 15 year old genius,
All: AHHHHHHH!
> the youngest FBI agent
>in it's history.
All: AHHHHHHH!
> She is currently working in the Behavioral Science unit
>where she wrote the profile that helped solve the Delmarco case a couple
>of months ago."
Servo: Oh...
Mike: My...
Crow: God...
> Scully told both Skinner and Mulder.
> "Right, Agent Riley is a excellent profiler who got her second Ph.D. in
Servo: Two PhD's...
Crow: Mike, I can't do this.
Mike: I don't know, Crow.
Servo: Mike? Is it at all possible that...you know who...had a sex change
and started watching the X-Files?
Mike: Servo....ouch.
Servo: Sorry.
>psychology, her first was in chemistry.
Mike: (Skinner) Uh, that's the chemistry of lip gloss, sorry.
> She has been working in the BS
>department
Servo: That's the biggest department in the whole....oh, I can't do this.
>for the past five months." Skinner explained. As he talked, he rose from
>his seat and moved to the front of his desk, sitting on the edge.
> "I know this girl. Her father and I were friends for years.
Crow: (Skinner) Before we got married.
> She is a
>very trustworthy and an extremely trusting person."
> "So, basically you want us to baby-sit Einstein?" Mulder asked angrily.
Servo: Young man, you quit developing the theory of relativity and
brush you teeth!
> "Agent Riley does not need babysitting.
Mike: (Skinner) She does need a diaper change, however.
> All she needs is for you to
>understand her situation.
Servo: He want's Mulder and Scully to understand what it's like
to be a genius?
Crow: Good luck.
> Understanding that she is a child in an adult
>world and is handling it the best she can."
>He said as he stood up and walked back behind his desk.
> "Agent Riley will be in contact."
Crow: Also starring Jodie Foster.
> That was their cue to leave, and
>they did.
> The two agents were silent on the way back down to their office. As
>they walked in, Scully put her hand on Mulder's arm and broke the
>silence.
> "Mulder, why don't you go home."
Mike: (Mulder) No! Why don't *you*?
Servo: (Scully) No! You!
Mike: (Mulder) No! You!
> When he started to protest she
Crow: Pulled out her gun, and...
>continued "This is a shock to both of us.
Servo: ZZZZZT!
> You go home and rest and I
>will see what I can find out about Agent Riley. I'll come to your place
>after work and we can talk."
> Mulder sighed accepting her offer.
> "Thanks, Scully." he said as he walked out the door.
> "You're welcome." she replied to his retreating back.
Mike: Whoa! Retreating back disease. Sounds painful.
> Scully then sat
>down in Mulder's desk and proceeded to see what she could find out about
>the new agent.
Servo: But she couldn't find a single file that didn't contain porn.
>
>End part 1 of Announcement
>
Mike: So, there *is* a God, then.
Servo: That's nice to know.
>
>
>
>
>Everything in part 1.
Mike: Made me want to kill myself.
Servo: So there *is* a God, but he hates us.
> Oh, there is a reference to a line in Tooms in this
>part. And November 27 was the date that Mulder's sister was taken on.
>*****************************************************
> Mulder's apartment
Crow: Ahh, I can smell the stale Chinese food from here.
> 7:30 p.m.
Servo: So, whose' birthday is on July 30th?
>
> When Mulder heard the knock on his front door, he knew it was
>Scully.
Crow: Like that's so amazing. No one else ever comes to visit him!
> He opened the door and looked at her. She had changed before
>coming, she now wore jeans and a light blue sweater. In her hands
>was a pizza box.
Mike: And in the pizza box was a gun.
>"Hi, Mulder" she greeted "I was pretty sure you hadn't eaten, so I
>brought pizza"
>"Ah, you know me well."
Servo: (Mulder) but not TOO well.
> He said trying to make the conversation light.
>This whole thing was really affecting him.
Crow: How do you think it's affecting *us*?
Mike: I think it's the smell of the pizza that's getting to Mulder.
Scully likes pineapple and anchovies.
> He opened the door the rest
>of the way
>to let her in. Scully walked in and went into the living room as Mulder
>went to the kitchen and got plates and drinks.
Servo: Uh, Mulder, the drinks go in *cups*.
>"You want iced tea or root beer to drink?" he called out.
Crow: I want ice beer.
Mike: I have a hankerin for root tea.
>"Ice tea" she answered while opening the pizza box. She looked up as
>Mulder set two glasses of tea down and handed her the plates.
Crow: Mulder has the "teaberry" pattern from Sears.
Mike: Oh, lovely.
>"Mmhh, pepperoni" Mulder said as Scully handed him his plate.
Crow: So they're just passing the plates back and forth.
Servo: Weird version of basketball.
> "So what
>did you
>find out about this Agent Riley?" he asked taking a bite of his pizza.
>"Basically, just what Skinner told us, but in more detail.
Mike: (Scully) Her full name is Danielle Mary Sue Marissa Riley.
> Agent
>Danielle Riley is a 15 year old genius, born on November 27, 1983."
Servo: (Scully) Heir to the throne of Essex...
>Scully paused
>and waited for Mulder's reaction.
Mike: Well, hunker down everyone. This could take a while.
> His eyes opened wide with shock.
>"Wow." he whispered.
Crow: Wowzewowwow!
>"Yeah, she graduated from high school at age eight, got her second Ph.D.
>
>at 14,
Mike: Took command of the Enterprise...
>then received special permission to join the FBI.
Mike: You know, I wouldn't put it past our government to arm a
15-year-old.
> She got
>assigned to Behavorial Sciences because of her degree in psychology. She
>seems to
>have knack for understanding suspects. I talked to one agent who worked
>with her and they said that she would sit for hours reading over all the
>
>case information
Servo: You just know there was a copy of "Teen Beat" hidden in the file.
Mike: Leo! JTT! Devon Sawa!
Crow: ohhh...Leo...
[Mike and Tom look at Crow.]
> and then write a profile that was so exact it was
>unbelievable. The agent said it was if she became the suspect.
Crow: (Scully) Sometimes they even found bodies *in* her apartment!
Weird, huh?
> He said,
>
>and I quote,
Mike: "Get this girl away from me. NOW."
> 'Its spooky'." Mulder's laughter at this last part broke
>the tension in the room.
> "The X-files is just one big spooky family,"
Servo: (singing) They're ooky and they're kooky.
> he joked. Scully had to
>smile at this,
Mike: HA! That Mulder.
> but both their smiles faded once they realized what they
>were talking about.
Crow: (Mulder and Scully) We're doomed.
> They both sat in silence until Mulder said
> "So, she's a genius. That doesn't tell us much about her."
Mike: Except that she's a hundred times smarter than everyone else
in this story.
> He had
>
>been hoping she could come up with more then that.
Servo: Gee, Mulder, maybe you should try hitting her! Maybe THAT would
make her work harder!
> "Well, when I dug a little deeper I found her name in an old file.
Crow: It was labeled "Ratliff". Does that mean anything to you?
>
>It turns out that when she was six her parents, Ben and Miranda Riley,
>were brutally murdered. She saw the whole thing. The FBI was called in
>to handle the situation because of prestige of the victims.
Mike: So the FBI only investigates the murder of rich people?
> The whole
>investigation was sloppy:
Crow: FBI agents shirt tails hanging out all over the place, empty
food cartons everywhere...
> evidence was lost, no suspects were ever
>named, and they never interviewed Agent Riley.
Crow: And they didn't even plant *one* bloody glove.
> It almost seems like
>someone was trying to cover up something.
Mike: Hmm. Whatever. Anyway...
> The case was never solved.
All: Da da DUMMMM!
>She now lives with her uncle, Senator James Riley, and I'm pretty sure
>that he's the reason she got special permission to join the bureau."
>Scully finished her story and took a bite of her now cold pizza.
> "So, do you think she's trustworthy?" Mulder asked.
> "I don't know, Mulder, I just don't know.
Mike: Don't ask me!
> We'll just have to wait
>and see." She replied as she took his hand in hers and gave it a
>squeeze. Telling him in their unspoken way that she would be here no
>matter what happened.
Servo: Yeah, right. Hundred bucks says if he pees on her again, she's
out of there.
Mike: No more betting.
Crow: Their code is: one squeeze for "I'll be here no matter what happens,"
and two for "Hunt down E.T. on your own time, freak."
> She had to be strong for Mulder even if she felt
>weak herself.
Servo: Scully? Weak? In a fanfic?
> Not because she knew that this new agent might be the
>destruction of the X-files, but because this new agent might be the
>destruction of her. It might force her to reveal the secret that she had
>
>kept to herself for so long.
>
>End part 2 of Announcement
> Find out what Scully's secret is in the 'Meeting.' Where Mulder and
>Scully meet Agent Riley for the first time.
>
>
[commercials for Khaluha-filmed in Drunk-O-Vision! TM]
[SOL bridge]
[Mike, Servo and Gypsy are in front of the bridge, with their backs to us.]
Servo: But Mike, this is ridiculous-we're right in the middle of a fanfic
and now we're supposed to sit through another one?
Mike: I know, Servo, but I think we should really try to be here for Crow-
Gypsy: I'm so excited! I've never read fanfic before.
[The lights go out and Crow appears behind the bridge, in a spotlight.
Crow: Thank you. And now, I present, my own fanfic:
Love Lost and Found
by Croeena Theresa Robot
Scully sighed. She was nervous about meeting the newest addition to the
X-Files that day. She heard a knock at the door. Was it Mulder? An image of
his dark hazel eyes flashed in her mind. Then the door opened-no one down
here but the FBI's most unwanted, the first words Mulder had ever said to
her. Then in walked a young girl, with golden red hair, just a tiny bit
more red and gold than Scully's own. "Hi" she said, "I'm Crowette."
[Servo tries to leave, but Mike holds him back]
"I don't want you here! I don't need a new partner!" Scully yelled. What if
Mulder liked her better? She was prettier!
"Hi, Scully! Who are you?" Mulder asked, stepping into the room.
Scully felt so hurt-how could he?-she ran out of the room, the tears
streaming down her face.
"What did you do to Scully?" Mulder asked angrily, his precious Scully was
hurt by this person.
"I'm sorry-I didn't mean to hurt her" Crowette said softly, her hair falling
into her big gorgeous yellow eyes.
[Mike puts his head down.]
Mulder laid his head on the desk and felt dejected. "Scully must be mad at
me. She hates me because since she's been working with me her sister died!"
He almost cried. "You should go talk to her." Crowette said.
"Really?" Mulder asked? "Yes" Crowette said. Mulder ran out of the room,
thinking that if he weren't so darn in love with Scully, he would marry
Crowette in a second. But he loved Scully and they lived happily ever after.
[lights come up]
Servo: I'm taking a shower. [he leaves]
Crow: Well, what did you think?
Mike: Crow-
[light flashes]
Crow: How romantic was that?
Mike: Oh, we've got fanfic sign, I'll deal with you later!
Crow: Gypsy, you liked it, right?
Gypsy: Uh...
[5...4...3...2...1...]
[Mike and the Bots file into the theater.]
>
>From: Dr_Dan...@webtv.net (Lexie)
Crow: Mike, have I ever mentioned how handsome you are?
Mike: Servo, switch seats with me. NOW.
Servo: Why, so he can develop a crush on me? No way, pal.
>Date: Mon, 10 May 1999 22:15:41 -0500 (CDT)
Servo: Doesn't she mean ten past five?
Mike: Oh, enough with the dates and the times already.
>Subject: Family Secrets II:
Servo: The Reckoning.
> The Meeting
Servo: Same thing.
>
>Title: Family Secrets II: The Meeting
>Author: Lexie
>Spoilers: There are a few lines from the pilot
Mike: Ladies and Gentlemen, please put you tray tables up...
> and one from the movie,
>but if you haven't
>seen them you'll be fine.
Crow: I couldn't have said it better myself.
>Feedback: Please, I'm begging you at Dr_Dan...@webtv.net
>Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully are not mine (sob) but Danielle Riley is
>all mine (smile).
>Summary: Mulder and Scully meet their new partner for the first time.
>Note: This is the second part in the series Family Secrets. If anyone
>wants the first part,
Mike: To be burned,
>Announcement, just let me know.
>
> *****************************************************
>J. Edgar Hover Building
> X-files office
> 10:37
>
Servo: What is that, Chris Carter's nephew's best friends' birthday?
Mike: Stop that.
>Mulder was really nervous about meeting their new partner. He glanced over
>at Scully. To the average onlooker she looked calm and collect, but he
>knew that something was bothering her.
>
>"She's probably just nervous about meeting Agent Riley" he said to
>himself.
Mike: Who wouldn't be?
> He opened his mouth to say something, but was stopped by the
>knocking on the door.
>
>"Here we go."
Crow: Wheeeeeee!
> he whispered, then louder he said "Nobody down here but the
>FBI's most unwanted"
Servo: And for good reason.
>
>He was so interested in the door that he didn't see Scully quickly turning
>her head to look at him.
>
Mike: (Mulder) This door is in on the conspiracy, I can *feel* it!
Servo: Brace yourselves, guys, here it comes...
>"Agent Mulder, Agent Scully"
Servo: It talks! AHHH!
> he heard as the door opened all the way to
>show a young woman ,with hair the color of fire,
Crow: That's not her hair, her head is actually *on fire*!!!
Mike: It's hair-smoking girl!
> who stood proud and tall.
Servo: Sarah, proud and tall.
>She took a few more steps into the room and said.
Crow: (Danielle) baby steps into the office...
> "I'm Danielle Riley,
>I've been assigned to work with you."
Servo: (Mulder) That's nice! Scully, kill me.
Mike: (Scully) No! You kill me.
>"Yes, Agent Riley we know why you're here."
Crow: (Scully) We know that you're here to steal all the office supplies.
> Scully said and the harsh tone
>in her voice almost knocked Mulder out of his chair. He rarely heard
>Scully talk like that, but he had to hand it to the younger agent.
Mike: (Mulder) Here you go.
Crow: (Danielle) Thanks.
> She
>barely flinched. Mulder know he better do something quick before he had a
>fight on his hands.
Crow: He's trying to prevent a girl fight?
Servo: That's *not* Mulder!
>
>"Agent Riley, do you know why you've been assigned to us?" he asked.
>
>"I believe it was because the X-files department was understaffed," she
>answered, walking farther into the room.
Mike: (Danielle) baby steps...
> As she got closer, Mulder got a
>good look at her.
Crow: Oh, lord. Someone hose off Mulder.
> She was tall, probably about 5'6, her hair was a deep
>red, not the fire he originally thought, her eyes were a deep hazel color,
>her face youthful, but showed all the tragedy she had endured.
>
Mike: Ok, lets see here. She's got red hair, *just like Scully*.
Servo: And Hazel eyes, *just like Mulder*.
Crow: And Scully's got an incredible secret.
Mike: And the title is "*Family* Secrets."
Servo: What is she implying here?
>**Mulder laughed to himself about the irony of having two red head on his
>hands.**
All: HINT! HINT! HINT!
> He opened his mouth to say something when Scully interrupted him.
>
>"You're probably here to do the work I didn't, " she said,
Servo: (Scully) So you better get to work cleaning the bathroom.
> her voice deep
>and harsh as she looked the younger agent in the eyes.
>
>"Agent Scully. I assure you, I have no idea what you are talking about."
>she said looking Scully right back in the eyes.
Servo: Some genius.
>
>"To debunk the X-files, to rein us in, to shut us down." Scully replied.
>
>"I have no plan or desire to do any harm to the X-files.
Crow: That's funny, cause I feel really harmed right now.
> I am here for one
>purpose,
Mike: To make all adults look like idiots.
Servo: It's the sacred mission of all 15-year-old geniuses the world over.
> to investigate the case that this department handles,"
Mike: They only have *one* case?
Servo: And they're understaffed?
> Agent
>Riley told them, her voice never wavering under the stareof the older
>agent.
Mike: Of course not.
Servo: That would imply weakness of some kind.
> Scully was silent for a long period of time and Agent Riley
>continued.
>
Servo: That's right, Scully, bow to the whim of the vastly more
intelligent teen-aged girl!
Mike: Oh, it's starting already.
>"Agent Scully, I may be inexperienced and young, but I know what this job
>requires, and I am more than willing to give it all that I have got in
>me."
>
>"Do you really know what this job requires?
Crow: (Danielle) Like, I just totally said that I *did*.
> The time, the danger, the
Servo: Acres and acres of doughnuts....
>horror, the lost." Scully said almost screaming, her voice wavering at
>the last part as if remembering her own loss during her years at the FBI.
>
>Mulder, who had keep quiet during this fight, had finally had enough. He
>couldn't understand why Scully was treating the newer agent this way.
>"Scully, outside. Now." He demanded.
>
Servo: (Mulder) Bad dog, outside, outside! Look what you did!
>"I have a meeting with AD Skinner, so I'll leave." Agent Riley said as
>she started to walk out the door.
Crow: Yes! She's leaving!
Servo: Not fast enough.
> When she got there she turned and looked
>at Scully.
Mike: No, don't look back.
> "I know the risk and the consequences that come with this job,
Servo: Like the risk that you'll become a delusional paranoid
schizophrenic hiding in a basement all day muttering about aliens.
>but I also know that there are rewards, too.
Servo: Like cookies!
> That is what I am here for,
>to have the reward of saving someone's life." She spoke softly as she
>glanced at both Agents and then left the basement office. They watched her
>go in silence.
>
>"What the hell was that about?" Mulder blunted out breaking the silence.
Mike: Damned if I know.
>
>"What was what about?" Scully asked knowing full well what he was talking
>about.
>
Crow: Then why..oh, forget it.
>"The way you where treating Agent Riley." he pointed to the door for
>emphasis.
Servo: I think Murder's a little confused.
Mike: Hey, Skinner can't tell the difference between chairs and agents,
and Mulder can't tell the difference between doors and agents.
Crow: Must be a man thing.
>
>"I thought you didn't want another partner."
>
>"I don't, but in the beginning I didn't want you for a partner either, and
Mike: (Mulder) I still don't.
>you turned out to be the best thing that every happened to me," he told
>her. Mulder studied her for a second.
Crow: (Mulder) Hmmm...."Scully, Chapter One: You're alien implant and you."
> her eyes were filled with tears,
>her face looked troubled, and her hands were twisted behind her back.
>
>"Scully, is something wrong?"
Servo: Gee, ya think?!
> his voice softened as he got up from his
>chair, but before he could reach her she said "I'm fine". Mulder doubted
>it and his face showed it.
Crow: (singing) if you doubt it and you know it clap your hands!
Mike: [clap clap]
> She then continued, "Well, actually I'm not
>feeling very well. I think I'll go home." Scully quickly grabbed her coat
>and made a beeline to the door.
>
>"Okay, Scully. But...." she left before he could finish.
>
>"..Call me to let me know everything is all right." he whispered to
>himself.
Mike: Why am I not surprised that Mulder talks to himself?
> Mulder sat back down in his chair and laid his head in his hands.
>He took a long deep breath,
All: [Loud gasping noise]
> just knowing that this situation was gong to
>be hard to get through.
>
Mike: Yeah, I don't doubt it.
>End of The Meeting
>
Mike: Amen to that.
>
>
>
[Mike picks up Servo and they file out...]
>
>
>
[1...2...3...4...5...SOL bridge]
[Mike, Crow, Gypsy and Servo are in their usual places]
Mike: Well, we survived that, at least.
Servo: Are you sure? I think I may have actually died. At least for a
second.
Gypsy: Wow. What was that like?
Servo: It was so...quiet...
[the light flashes and Mike hits it]
Crow: Gypsy?
Gypsy: What, Crow?
Crow: Do you ever feel...no so fresh?
Mike: All right, THAT'S IT- [Mike grabs Crow, hilarity ensues.]
[Castle Forrester]
[Brain Guy is in bed, with the covers pulled up to his chin. His brain-
with the ice bag still on it- is sitting on the pillow next to his head.
He has a thermometer in his mouth. Pearl is standing next to the bed with
a spoon full of medicine.]
Brain Guy: But it'll *hurt* if I swallow-
Pearl: You'll take this Triamenic, and you'll like it, or I'll use your
brain for a doorstop, understand?
[Bobo enters, wearing a nurses uniform.]
Bobo: Time for your sponge-bath, Brain Guy-
Brain Guy: Ah-ah-
Pearl: Brain Guy, no!
Brain Guy: -CHOO!!
[Bobo disappears and is replaced by a big guy with a beard, who looks a
*lot* like that guy from Roman times. He speaks with Bobo's voice, too.
Hmmmm.]
Bobo: Ah! Oh, my fur! I feel so...naked! Brain Guy, what did you *do*?
Pearl: That was on purpose, wasn't it?
Bobo: Someone get me a blanket.
[Credits]
Mystery Science Theater 3000 and its related characters and situations
are Trademarks and Copyright 1997 of Best Brains Inc., all rights are
reserved.
Use of Copyright and Trademark is for entertainment purposes only-no
infringement is intended or should be inferred.
This misting is not meant to insult the authors whose work appears within.
>In her arms, he began to jerk uncontrollably. His organs were failing on
>him. Why couldn't they try harder?
President Chester A. Arthur
Caitlin.
President Chester A. Arthur, the anti-Rutherford Hayes
Jean
Oh my goodness, those were lovely. Many LOLs. Thank you.
Jean
Caitlin
Now...I'm galvanized! I'm going to write a SECOND misting!
'Cause what I needed was another thing to distract me from my homework! :)
-Cait
*heads off to fanfiction.net...*
Jean
Caitlin wrote:
>
> Now...I'm galvanized! I'm going to write a SECOND misting!
Yay!
>
> 'Cause what I needed was another thing to distract me from my homework! :)
Perhaps you might investigate a little inconspicuous deflection? 'Homework'
is but a fading memory to me, lo those many eons ago, but 'housework' is a
perpetual and dolorous obligation. May I advise that you practice saying,
over and over again, to the impacted authorities, "Laundry? What Laundry?"
Insert objective of your choice.
> -Cait
> *heads off to fanfiction.net...*
Cool place. Neat stuff.
Jean