[Sith War EYE-ECCHs] No one Expects Rent-A-Zilla
Jedah
back, looking bored and uninterested. "How can I help you?" he asked in
a nasily tone.
"You can give me my damn money back!" Jedah demanded.
The clerk sighed, "Defective product or dissatisfaction?"
"Both!" From behind his back, a 24 inch tall lizard stepped out and
roared, which while possessing impressive scales, fangs and claws, still
looked capable of frightening Barbie dolls only. "You call THIS a
Rent-A-Zilla?"
"Yes sir. In some universes they are smaller than in others," the clerk
replied. "We can refund your deposit, but not the leased amount paid if
you are dissatisfied."
Jedah fumed. "Fine...Zilla, roast him!" The little lizard puffed a bit
of fire at the clerk, who promptly ducked.
"Sir, there's no need for that. Perhaps you'd like the matching
Rent-a-Kong?" the clerk said, and a simian counterpart to Rent-A-Zilla
loped out from the back.
"That's not King Kong! That's a chimp with delusions of grandure!!!"
Jedah wailed. "And for that matter, so are you! But I'll take him.
Sith knows you can always use an extra monkey."
"Very good, sir..." the clerk droned on, handing Jedah some paperwork.
*** Several minutes later ***
Jedah pulled his tie a bit straighter, and made sure the suit coat fit
properly. As a final touch, he slid the black Raybans into position.
Flanking him, Rent-A-Zilla and Rent-A-Kong were wearing matching black
suits, white shirts, and black ties. Both had kids Raybans on their
snouts.
Jedah looked at them, "I make this look good." He pointed to the nifty
hologram wall in his secret lair. "We are the last line of defense
RASSM has against the Porkinites. We must recruit others to our side.
Already Rent-A-Kong has plastered the street with Karaoke Machine ads,
which, when used will emit deprogramming waves. Boys, we need to wipe
this scum off our (many times rebuilt) planet. We are the few, the
proud...we are the Monsters In Black."
As the two MIBs scuttled away, Jedah sat at his command chair. The
lights dimmed and a holographic image appeared - a cloaked man, his face
invisible.
"Lord Jedah, be mindful. I sense a powerful disturbance in the force,"
the image intoned.
"Yes, my master. Soon we shall reveal 733+ on our Porkinite foes.
Soon, we will have r3\/3ng3," Jedah replied as the scene got dark
because the author had to get back to work.
******************
Summary: 2+2=4
Jedah has a Rent-A-Zilla and Rent-A-Kong...but both are about 2 feet
tall. However, both are part of Monsters In Black, and have been
sending out those Karaoke Machine ads to try to deprogram the populace
of RASSM. Also, Jedah apparently serves some darker power. Either that
or he's schizophrenic and that was just a recording.
For all those OPPOSED TO THE PORKINITE OPPRESSION!!!! Join me! Together
we will defeat the evil Porkinses, and restore peace to the Galaxy.
Join the Jedah Alliance!!!
Jedah
733+ M45t3r
--
Posted via Mailgate.ORG Server - http://www.Mailgate.ORG
Daniel Olin Miller
> "...Sith knows you can always use an extra monkey."
I nominate this the Soup du Jour.
Daniel O. Miller
Here in my car,
The image breaks down,
Will you visit me please,
If I open my door,
In cars...
Rainbow Heron
<vade...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>We are the few, the proud...we are the Monsters In Black."
LOL!!!! I LIIIIIIIIIIKE this I LIIIIIIIKE this!!!
Does everyone who joins up get the cool outfit too?!
-Rainbow Heron
(sig thinks it makes this post look good)
That's debatable. <ng sig whacks RH with the typo stick> Hey! I
spelled it **right** that time!
==========================================
http://web.infoave.net/~rkanderson/rassm/swc.htm
Rainbow Heron's Sith War Characters Page
==========================================
Jell-o jigglers are like Gak
...except they don't make that fart noise.
DarthGumby
*snark*
We shall see... :)
DG
My next post will be a short post.
Michael Shaffer
news:3c59bedc....@nntp.ftc-i.net...
> On Thu, 31 Jan 2002 14:27:49 +0000 (UTC), "Jedah"
> <vade...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> >We are the few, the proud...we are the Monsters In Black."
>
> LOL!!!! I LIIIIIIIIIIKE this I LIIIIIIIKE this!!!
>
> Does everyone who joins up get the cool outfit too?!
>
Absolutely. In SW7 I was handing out nifty regenerative suits that
could regrow whole body parts. Tailored black suits are a snap. And
you get Raybans. Oh, and the little neuralizer thingee too. Working on
the Noisey Crickets...they're on back order.
> -Rainbow Heron
> (sig thinks it makes this post look good)
>
> That's debatable. <ng sig whacks RH with the typo stick> Hey! I
> spelled it **right** that time!
> ==========================================
> http://web.infoave.net/~rkanderson/rassm/swc.htm
> Rainbow Heron's Sith War Characters Page
> ==========================================
> Jell-o jigglers are like Gak
> ...except they don't make that fart noise.
I should also point out that former member of the Gungan Mafia in hiding
are welcome to return to my side. You know who you are. "Weesa makea
yousa an offer yousa cannot refusea."
Jedah
Formerly Boss Jedah, Formerly Maud'dib Jedah (keeper of the holy word
BOOBIES) and current heavyweight champion of the WWF (you'd be amazed
what you can buy for $50)
Rainbow Heron
<vade...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>> >We are the few, the proud...we are the Monsters In Black."
>>
>> LOL!!!! I LIIIIIIIIIIKE this I LIIIIIIIKE this!!!
>>
>> Does everyone who joins up get the cool outfit too?!
>>
>
>Absolutely. In SW7 I was handing out nifty regenerative suits that
>could regrow whole body parts. Tailored black suits are a snap. And
>you get Raybans. Oh, and the little neuralizer thingee too. Working on
>the Noisey Crickets...they're on back order.
Coooooooooooooooooooool! <RH/Alice drools:>"The Men in Black division
over at the DJS* utterly *refuses* to share their toys with us! :-P"
>I should also point out that former member of the Gungan Mafia in hiding
>are welcome to return to my side. You know who you are. "Weesa makea
>yousa an offer yousa cannot refusea."
>
>Jedah
>Formerly Boss Jedah, Formerly Maud'dib Jedah (keeper of the holy word
>BOOBIES) and current heavyweight champion of the WWF (you'd be amazed
>what you can buy for $50)
Mesa liken Gungans really bombad. Yousen could be goodgood for usen in
later ouch time.
-Rainbow Heron
(sig liken Gungans too and declares them to be .Significant)
*Dimension Jumper Squad. See the site: