101 Uses For An Ewok -- current standings

[Simon H. Lee]

Subject: Re: A NEW IMPROVED "101 Uses For An Ewok!"

"101 Uses For (Things you can do to) an Ewok"

1. If you impale 2 on opposite ends of a large metal hoop you have a pair
of earmuffs for a Rancor... (Daniel Miller)

2. Dip an Ewok in kerosene, put it in a wicker basket atop a pole, light
'im up, and you have a lawn torch! (Daniel Miller)

3. Chop his arms and legs off - pincushion! (Mark Burbidge)

4. Skin an Ewok for a real nice toliet seat cushion.. (Dave Minton)

5. Roll them up into a ball, give them to some Jedi, LIGHTSABER
BASEBALL!!! (Akira)

6. Impale two Ewoks unto opposite ends of a cylinrical piece of
cardboard, and you have a Q-tip for Jabba. (Akira)

7. Arctic shoes for Chewbacca. (Akira)

8. Darth Vader could use one to buff his helmet with. (Akira)

--
___________________A L L D O N E! B Y E B Y E!____________________
| __ |
| (__ * _ _ _ _ "This beer's on you Chiggy boy!" |
| __)|| | |(_)| \ --Pearly the tank, Space: AAB |
|_________________________________________________________________________|

[Qwyn]

sh...@cornell.edu (Simon H. Lee) wrote:
>Subject: Re: A NEW IMPROVED "101 Uses For An Ewok!"
>
>
>
> "101 Uses For (Things you can do to) an Ewok"
>
>1. If you impale 2 on opposite ends of a large metal hoop you have a pair
> of earmuffs for a Rancor... (Daniel Miller)
>
>2. Dip an Ewok in kerosene, put it in a wicker basket atop a pole, light
> 'im up, and you have a lawn torch! (Daniel Miller)
>
>3. Chop his arms and legs off - pincushion! (Mark Burbidge)
>
>4. Skin an Ewok for a real nice toliet seat cushion.. (Dave Minton)
>
>5. Roll them up into a ball, give them to some Jedi, LIGHTSABER
> BASEBALL!!! (Akira)
>
>6. Impale two Ewoks unto opposite ends of a cylinrical piece of
> cardboard, and you have a Q-tip for Jabba. (Akira)
>
>7. Arctic shoes for Chewbacca. (Akira)
>
>8. Darth Vader could use one to buff his helmet with. (Akira)

How about oven mitts? After thoroughly gutting them out, they'd
make fine pot holders too!

[Qwyn]

[Marco]

Keep 'em coming people. I'm collecting them and adding them to the list
we started last year. We have about 60 or 70 now.

Marco.

[G. Wayne Calvert]

You will never run out of dog food again!

[Chris Kern]

In article <Pine.A32.3.91.960408...@umabnet.ab.umd.edu>,

Marco <mcav...@umabnet.ab.umd.edu> wrote:
>
>Keep 'em coming people. I'm collecting them and adding them to the list
>we started last year. We have about 60 or 70 now.
>
>

If you put some dead ones together you could make a rug.
Use them as probes to see if a planet is hospitable.
Give to Vader so he can vent his wrath on something.
Give to yourself so YOU can vent your wrath on something.
Three words: Guard Dog Training(Or guard Noghri training)

[Jtrory]

How about sticking a piece of wood up their arses and using them as "Ewok
mops"

"Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast" --- Commander A J Rimmer
--- Red Dwarf

[Sir Philippe]

keep a whole tribe out the back in case your are attacked
by a bunch of ST's with blasters. The Ewoks will run out
and hit them with wooden sticks with bits of stone on the
ends.

Sir Philippe
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hmmmm.....
<please insert cool Yoda laugh>

THE TEA PARTY ARE GODS.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[KOSMATOS Odisseas]

Jtrory (jtr...@aol.com) wrote:

: How about sticking a piece of wood up their arses and using them as "Ewok
: mops"

Uses around the house:

1. Stuff your home theatre room walls with them to provide good sound
dampening.

2. Tie one above every entrance to the house. Instruct it to bonk
intruders on the head with rocks, or to build tree-trunk sandwich
traps in case Robocop decides to pay a visit.

3. Have 'em dig a 1 mile deep nuclear fallout shelter in your back yard.
After that, the can build a tree house for your kids.

4. Automatic garage door opener(s).

Outdoors:

5. Carry your backpack when you go on hikes.

Odi

[David C. Durkee]

I am probably the only other person here who knows who the Tea Party are. 'the edges
of twilight' is one of the best albums ever!!!

[mdb]

True or False:

>Subject: Re: A NEW IMPROVED "101 Uses For An Ewok!"

> "101 Uses For (Things you can do to) an Ewok"

>1. If you impale 2 on opposite ends of a large metal hoop you have a pair
> of earmuffs for a Rancor... (Daniel Miller)

>2. Dip an Ewok in kerosene, put it in a wicker basket atop a pole, light
> 'im up, and you have a lawn torch! (Daniel Miller)

>3. Chop his arms and legs off - pincushion! (Mark Burbidge)

>4. Skin an Ewok for a real nice toliet seat cushion.. (Dave Minton)

>5. Roll them up into a ball, give them to some Jedi, LIGHTSABER
> BASEBALL!!! (Akira)

>6. Impale two Ewoks unto opposite ends of a cylinrical piece of
> cardboard, and you have a Q-tip for Jabba. (Akira)

>7. Arctic shoes for Chewbacca. (Akira)

>8. Darth Vader could use one to buff his helmet with. (Akira)

9> Crash Test Dummies (particuarly infant/children's safety seats)

10> Industrial/Chemical testing, ie new Cosmetic products, food
additives, shampoos, etc.

Of course we all know number 101: Merchandising, merchandising,
merchandising (AKA Let's make lots of money.)

We'll declare war on everybody, but we won't tell anybody.

)7( ;] ) 13

NINE-teen-FIFTY-five!