[HUMOR] - Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
Stan Jensen
After several years at the Intergalactic Berlitz Academy, Chewbacca
spoke 14 languages fluently. Then came his habit of chewing tobacco,
his throat cancer, the laryngectomy and the nickname.
Britney Spears and Han Solo were married for a few weeks.
Chewbacca finishes second in a holographic chess tournament, won by a
formerly two-armed contestant.
Darth Vader's power really comes from Cheez-Its and Kellogg's Corn
Fight scene involving Obi-Wan's lightsaber and Padme's distended belly
button.
Jar Jar inadvertently allows Chancellor Palpatine to create the Empire
by introducing a measure in the Galactic Senate to end the filibuster.
Samuel L. Jackson managed to keep a straight face while reciting his
lines.
Steven Tyler cameos as an undercover agent trying to keep tabs on the
Dark Side in the drag guise of Big Mama-Kin Skywalker.
Surprise cameo featuring George Lucas rolling around in a pile of
cash.
That scene where Triumph the Insult Comic Dog gets all up in Darth
Vader's grill.
To improve the acting range and add depth to the Anakin
Skywalker/Darth Vader character, Hayden Christensen shares screen time
with his "Attack of the Clones" action figure.
We learn that Yoda developed his backward speech style as a joke for
his 300th birthday and liked it so much he just kept it.
Weird alien bar scene features Michael Jackson, Anne Heche and Mike
Tyson as a 10,000 Maniacs tribute band.
Yoda has a pet wamp rat named Fluffy.
Yoda? Hermaphrodite.
"Marry Padme you did, but father her children you did not. That
shorter Jedi did, hmmm?"
After the end credits, there's a still shot of George Lucas' ass.
Tattooed upon it are the words "Kiss It Again, Fanboys."
Anakin Skywalker descends into hell, becoming gangsta rapper Darth V.
Anakin grows up to become not Darth Vader, but Captain Kirk.
Attempting to repair deeply rooted public disdain, Jar Jar Binks
appears in a scene with Jane Fonda.
Darth Vader *does* betray and murder Luke's father. And then the
bastard adopts him!
It quickly becomes obvious that Chewbacca was the man in his later
relationship with Han.
Millions of geeks stayed up late Wednesday night to feel the power of
the dork side.
Obi-Wan throws Darth Vader his cloak in exchange for a Coke.
PG-13 rating may actually be rather charitable, considering that
steamy Jabba the Hutt sex scene.
Palpatine is actually Darth Sidious? Gosh, why didn't I notice that
before?
Pregnant, schmegnant -- she's *still* hot.
The cameo by Buzz Lightyear.
The dark side of Yoda? Fozzie Bear!
The leather holster for Mace Windu's lightsaber clearly reads "Bad
Mother F*cker."
Anakin's trip to the Dark Side begins with a marathon session of
"Magic: The Gathering" in a damp basement.
George Lucas does a Hitchcock-style cameo as the Jedi Macarena
instructor.
Wookiee planet populated by thousands of Robin Williams clones.
Who's that scrunching himself up to get inside the Yoda suit? None
other than Jude Frickin' Law!
Jabba and Kirstie Alley appear on-screen together. So much for *that*
theory.
A Jedi mutters, "Why the hell is this guy still here?!?" then swiftly
lightsaber-beheads Jar Jar Binks.
In the end they eat Yoda and decide he tastes like asparagus.
The second half is nothing but Jar Jar Binks fishing with his
half-brother Ginko Biloba.
Chancellor Palpatine played by now-wrinkly Mark Hamill.
It's finally revealed why C-3PO is such a pain in the ass:
hemmorhdroids!
The mystery of Michael Jackson's origin is still unanswered.
Rumors of on-screen allusions to the Bush administration are
ridiculous. George W. Bush looks nothing like Chancellor W. Palpatine.
That "Star Wars" kid from the Internet video totally handed Skywalker
his ass.
Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
night light.
Tabloid pics of Darth Vader doing laundry on Tatooine in his skivvies.
and the Number 1 Biggest Surprise in the New "Star Wars" Movie...
Anakin is a sled.
John Savard
wrote, in part:
> and the Number 1 Biggest Surprise in the New "Star Wars" Movie...
>Anakin is a sled.
Somebody else already made *that* movie... and, come to think about it,
it was all about someone else's journey to the Dark Side, after starting
out as a crusading newspaper publisher. And, come to think of it,
getting involved with a woman played a big part in his transformation!
But I think it's clear that Rosebud is *Shmi*.
John Savard
http://www.quadibloc.com/index.html
_________________________________________
Usenet Zone Free Binaries Usenet Server
More than 120,000 groups
Unlimited download
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Bart
policr...@hotmail.com
> and the Number 1 Biggest Surprise in the New "Star Wars" Movie...
>
> Anakin is a sled.
Beautiful!!
Pol'
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
Senator Bail Organia sponsors the Empire Patriot Act.
Papatine tells Anakin "I am your father".
A major scandal erupts over cost overruns for the Death Star.
The Moral Majority lambastes Padme for having kids out of wedlock (since
she and Anakin were keeping their marriage a secret). (How was Padme
explaining her pregnancy?).
Amnesty Interstellar accuses Anakin of massacring native populations on
Tatooine.
Cheeze
Tim Bruening wrote:
>
> Papatine tells Anakin "I am your father".
>
>
I actually thought he was going to say this after the Dart Plageious
speech.
:-)
I was getting ready to shout my "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" and then jump off
the movie balcony.
Tim Bruening
Cheeze wrote:
LOL!
Captain Murphy
>Tim Bruening wrote:
>> Papatine tells Anakin "I am your father".
>I actually thought he was going to say this after the Dart Plageious
>speech.
>the movie balcony.
Well, he basically did, just not in those exact words.
nemo
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:42A01473...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
Lucky there wasn't a charater called Elohin. That would have caused a bit of
trouble!
nemo
"Cheeze" <csmar...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1117789564.5...@g49g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
Falling from the balcony in a British Cinema: A circulation problem.
Tim Bruening
Captain Murphy wrote:
In what way is Papatine Anakin's father? When did he sneak off to Tatooine
to have sex with Anakin's mother?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
How and why?
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
The opposition party accuses Palpatine's party of stealing the election.
The Republic buys election software from Diebold.
nemo
flaming temper who Asbestine protected everyone from?
And was Papatine married to Mamatine? And what about the bald headed
character, Ovaltine?
Seriously - if a film uses a childish formula for the names of its
characters, it's certain to be crap! I've already heard it described as all
special effects and no story, with poor, self-conscious acting.
nemo
it's the root of the word Allah.
Might have had some of the more learned of Alcy Aida's
tyrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrsts blowing up cinemas.
G*d? YxxH?
Yeah. I don't want to get stoned, whether or not John Cleese blows his
whistle!
nemo
names the film's going to be even worse than I thought! Dumbed down for the
kids! Having the two funny robots was bad enough!
> The opposition party accuses Palpatine's party of stealing the election.
>
> The Republic buys election software from Diebold.
The Bold usually die before the meek, as in . .
There are old pilots, and there are bold pilots -
But there are no old, bold pilots.
(Some Mothers do 'av 'em.)
It's also why there's a death march in the middle of Beethoven's Eroica
Symphony.
scratch
"papatine" is a typo, and he wasn't a father in the actual movies anyway.
-scratch
scratch
>
> It's what G*d was called in the O.T. before he declared himself as YxxH and
> it's the root of the word Allah.
wow, god was in the original trilogy?
-scratch
nemo
"scratch" <scr...@the-pentagon.com> wrote in message
news:_QZpe.87630$yV4.80948@okepread03...
Spell him with a capital or he'll make you itch for all eternity!
nemo
Somebosy nrrds a new keyboatd yhen!
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> Tabloid pics of Darth Vader doing laundry on Tatooine in his skivvies.
Skivvy: Vampire underwear.
Undies: Demon briefs, or D. Briefs for short.
Indy: Demon car race.
nemo
Old Testament!
Keep watching out for those tyrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrsts!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Who will flush the Bible down a toilet?
nemo
"nemo" <ne...@newtylust.nit> wrote in message
news:CG1qe.20625$bl3....@fe1.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
Then he'll *really* get infected!
Septy Seamier! The seventh disease you can catch in a French brothel!
Nemo
Numbo One Punster!
scratch
>
>>
>>Keep watching out for those tyrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrsts!
>
>
> Who will flush the Bible down a toilet?
>
there's no proof that they'd ever do such a thing.
-scratch
Tim Bruening
the Death Star.
nemo
I don't think so. They believe in the same Old Teatament as we do, but with
the Koran on top of it.
They might flush a separate New Testament down the toilet ice up hose
(brrr!).
nemo
> Padme and other liberal Senators make repeated attempts to cut off funding
for
> the Death Star.
>
Ray-gun's starwars scheme!
Someone in need of praise and affection: Padme Yonder-Head.
Nemo
Numbo One Punster!
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
>
> Tabloid pics of Darth Vader doing laundry on Tatooine in his skivvies.
>
> and the Number 1 Biggest Surprise in the New "Star Wars" Movie...
>
> Anakin is a sled.
Thousands of Jedi Masters are accused of sexually molesting their
students in various Jedi Temples.
Jar Jar Binks sponsors the Republic Patriot Act to give security and
intelligence agencies more power to spy on people.
Republic prison guards are accused of stacking naked prisoners in
pyramids, putting leashes on them, and making them stand on boxes with
electrodes attached.
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
Palpatine calls for constitutional amendments to ban homosexual
marriages, inter species marriage, and abortion. He also calls for a
constitutional amendment to permit prayers in schools.
nemo
Whacko Jacko could play one of those. They could save money on the costume
too. He already has a built-in mask!
>
> Jar Jar Binks sponsors the Republic Patriot Act to give security and
> intelligence agencies more power to spy on people.
>
> Republic prison guards are accused of stacking naked prisoners in
> pyramids, putting leashes on them, and making them stand on boxes with
> electrodes attached.
So they've started torturing boxes now?
nemo
Master Alf
Remember at the end of Ep I, he said, "Good job Annie, I've been
watching your carer [his mom] with great interest."
Master Alf
Bart wrote:
> Yeah - but do you have anything that's funny?
He was trying to be funny? Let me read again. No, I don't get that.
While I don't remember any of that happening in E3, perhaps I'm missing
some subtle metaphor for some things I should have been looking out
for.
Was Britney spears in one of the trade federation costumes possibly?
One of them did have fairly big boobies for being an alien. Hmmm. I'm
just confused. :(
Venger
"Master Alf" <john....@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1118874378.3...@o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com...
Uh, no, that's not what he says.
Venger
Matthew Donovan
"Master Alf" <john....@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1118874378.3...@o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com...
>
>
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
nemo
Sounds like they don't know what they're Darwin!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
The Empire bans stem cell research.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Republic Senators accuse Palpatine of getting caught in a quagmire.
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
The Republic Senate passes an amendment to ban flag burning.
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
The Empire gives tax breaks to oil drillers.
nemo
Todd
>Republic prison guards are accused of stacking naked prisoners in
>pyramids, putting leashes on them, and making them stand on boxes with
>electrodes attached.
All enemy combatants are droids. They're already naked. And seldom
taken prisoner.
Todd
>Spell him with a capital or he'll make you itch for all eternity!
That goes for pronouns, too.
nemo
"Todd" <no...@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:8s9gf1p7ls63mjaql...@4ax.com...
too tall they collapse in a big, squidgy, bloody mess!
Praps that's what happened to the piggy face of that allegedly female US
soldier - a pile of them collapsed on her head!
Saw a bunch of Moslem youngsters playing football up Regent's Park yesterday
and shouting out "Allah" and "Allah hwwakhbah" (excuse the phonetic
spelling) to each other in their excitement when they successfully passed
the ball or scored a goal.
It was a nice sunny evening and it was very nice to hear those expressions
being used under such happy circumstances.
The horrible nasty little fundamentalists would loathed the way they were
enjoying themselves!
One of them has already run away to Lebanon because he's frightened of being
charged with treason over here! Coward!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/4133150.stm
He's still going "Boo!" at the camera!
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Mon, 08 Aug 2005 20:49:38 -0700, Todd <no...@nowhere.com> found these
> unused words floating about:
> Timmette speaketh from personal experience ... he's the minority whip.
Anakin took a human named Count Doku (sp?) prisoner, then beheaded him! He
later took Chancellor Palpatine prisoner and almost beheaded him too!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
nemo
. . after Daft Vader attends a Billy Graham rally?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
nemo
Stem Cell: Practiced by an unlucky florist whose flowers have all had their
heads chopped off by a strange kind of burglar.
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
close election.
Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
nemo
Most people diestupid of diescared!
Tim Bruening
Cheeze wrote:
> Tim Bruening wrote:
> >
> > Papatine tells Anakin "I am your father".
> >
> >
>
> I actually thought he was going to say this after the Dart Plageious
> speech.
> :-)
>
> I was getting ready to shout my "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" and then jump off
> the movie balcony.
LOL!
nemo
I prefer a stationary balcony that stays up on the wall where it's supposed
to. I'm 80ft up on the fifth floor!
Tim Bruening
nemo
Really? I thought it was Fred Karno's Army!
http://www.phrases.org.uk/bulletin_board/27/messages/792.html
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
The Empire is found to have suppressed evidence on global warming.
nemo
Remains of a cricket referee found incased in concrete in the base of a
building: Foundation and Umpire.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:45E6444F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:42BA6E4B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Stan Jensen wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > > > >
> > > > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > > > night light.
> > > >
> > > > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> > > >
> > > > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
> > >
> > > Sounds like they don't know what they're Darwin!
> >
> > The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
> >
> > The Empire is found to have suppressed evidence on global warming.
>
> Remains of a cricket referee found incased in concrete in the base of a
> building: Foundation and Umpire.
Actual book titles by retire Umpire Ron Luciano: The Umpire Strikes Back, Fall
Of The Roman Umpire.
nemo
LOL! I wonder if he'd be willing to come and keep the peace on here.
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
close election.
Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
The Republic's Senate passed a "Galactic Patriot Act" and also set up a
"Home Galaxy Security Department".
nemo
>
>
> Stan Jensen wrote:
>
> > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> >
> > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > night light.
>
> Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
And their boss is a Lighth Vader?
>
> The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
So do parts of the US - in spite of the obvious resemblance between
Dubbaya's facial expressions and those of a chimpanzee!
Or perhaps because of them.
>
> The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
> close election.
>
> Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
Very difficult to Diebold. You can be very couragious beforehand foot toe
and knee, but at the point of death, the mast vajority of people are very
scared and humble, innit?!!
>
> The Republic's Senate passed a "Galactic Patriot Act" and also set up a
> "Home Galaxy Security Department".
Finally time for "Spaceballs 2 - The Search for More Money" perhaps?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Senator Padme called for the impeachment of Chancellor Palpatine.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Senator Padme sponsored a no confidence vote on the Galactic Attorney
General.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Chancellor Palpatine set up a wireless surveillance program.
nemo
Weee are the Palpateenies - little Burles and Goys.
We say our daft names all the day,
It makes the old folks go away.
Will you share our songs and stories,
Will you share our joys,
Because we get up Palpatine -
At breakfast tea and in between -
She loves it if you know what we mean,
We're happy girls and boys!
Wasn't she one of the Optimen in The Eyes of Heisenberg???
nemo
Why would she want to spy upon people's wireless sets?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Palpatine is a man!
nemo
That's her. Right cow!
Sounds like a cross between a Vernier gauge and a willie!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:42BA6E4B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > Stan Jensen wrote:
> >
> > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > >
> > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > night light.
> >
> > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> >
> > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
>
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:45E6444F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:42BA6E4B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Stan Jensen wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > > > >
> > > > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > > > night light.
> > > >
> > > > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> > > >
> > > > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
> > >
> > > Sounds like they don't know what they're Darwin!
> >
> > The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
> >
> > The Empire is found to have suppressed evidence on global warming.
>
> Remains of a cricket referee found incased in concrete in the base of a
> building: Foundation and Umpire.
Actual book titles by retire Umpire Ron Luciano: The Umpire Strikes
nemo
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:42BA6E4B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > Stan Jensen wrote:
> > >
> > > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > > >
> > > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > > night light.
> > >
> > > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> > >
> > > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
> >
> > Sounds like they don't know what they're Darwin!
>
> The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
Blast!
>
> The Empire is found to have suppressed evidence on global warming.
That's daft, Vada!
nemo
I'm reading Foreword The Foundation at the moment, and I'll tell you what -
it's a hell of a long foreword!
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
Stan Jensen wrote:
> Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>
> Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> night light.
Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
close election.
Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
The Republic's Senate passed a "Galactic Patriot Act" and also set up a
nemo
They look after the chocolate bars?
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
news:BZT8k.16446$E41...@text.news.virginmedia.com...
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:ytKdneDecNWRpfnV...@centurytel.net...
to do one-word answers.
He also used to try to wind people up by signing off, "You done yet?" so I
started using, "Odin yet?? Norse not!"
We've got a beer here in teh UK called Spitfire and at teh bottom of teh
label it says, "The Bottle of Britain"!!
Yum, again!
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
>
> <hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
> news:ytKdneDecNWRpfnV...@centurytel.net...
>>
>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
>> news:BZT8k.16446$E41...@text.news.virginmedia.com...
>> >
>> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
>> > news:47F18203...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>> >>
>> >>
>> >> Stan Jensen wrote:
>> >>
>> >> > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
>> >> >
>> >> > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
>> >> > night light.
>> >>
>> >> Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
>> >>
>> >> The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
>> >>
>> >> The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
>> >> close election.
>> >>
>> >> Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
>> >>
>> >> The Republic's Senate passed a "Galactic Patriot Act" and also set up
>> >> a
>> >> "Home Galaxy Security Department".
>> >
>> > They look after the chocolate bars?
>> >
>> Yum...
>>
> You're not Spitfire from alt.tastless.humour from 9/11 days are yer. He
> used
> to do one-word answers.
NO.
>
> He also used to try to wind people up by signing off, "You done yet?" so I
> started using, "Odin yet?? Norse not!"
Shocking!
>
> We've got a beer here in teh UK called Spitfire and at teh bottom of teh
> label it says, "The Bottle of Britain"!!
Wish I had a dozen bottles of it right now!
> Yum, again!
>
That was nice of you.
HJ
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:VbKdne-kkpYOOfvV...@centurytel.net...
> >
> > He also used to try to wind people up by signing off, "You done yet?" so
I
> > started using, "Odin yet?? Norse not!"
>
> Shocking!
>
> >
> > We've got a beer here in teh UK called Spitfire and at teh bottom of teh
> > label it says, "The Bottle of Britain"!!
>
> Wish I had a dozen bottles of it right now!
>
> > Yum, again!
> >
> That was nice of you.
>
Purely accidental higher sewer ewe.
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
HJ
nemo
starch from cornflour that it was thickened with. Shoiws how little cocoa
there was in it! It didn't like me though. Gave me indigestion it did!
I'm noshing a bar of inSainsbury's Belgian dark chocolate at the moment.
Umyay umyay! Uchmay Etterbay!
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:lYmdnZW1FK6fz_DV...@centurytel.net...
solids chocolate and I'm Vegan! :o(
I thought this sort of thing would happen when I found out that dumb bloody
Cadbury's had bought a 60% stake in the company!
The G&B stuff is Ł1.69 ($3.35) a bar. The Sainsbury's is 99p ($1.96) a bar.
So I'm saving money as well.
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:oIKdnVsbdrrub_rV...@centurytel.net...
with Basmati rice and a mung bean curry with all the spices that aren't in
the Batata Vada. Works well that does. You get a nice contrast of flavours -
and with a nice bottle of inSainsbury's Montepulciano d'Abruzzo to wash it
down with.
Well, only two or three glasses actually. I've got to be up early tomorrow
to take delivery of a Sigma 10-20mm zoom lens. I'm fed up with having to
walk backwards to get everything in shot! There are these things called
cliffs you know! :o(
Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghghghghg! . . . . SPLATT!
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
Splat....BAD!
HJ
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
> So I'm saving money as well.
>
HJ
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:eJKdnU84q4LYCPPV...@centurytel.net...
mung and black-eye peas, and any curry with a bit too much asafoetida in
it! - even at 61, these are still most effective!
http://www.theepicentre.com/Spices/asafetid.html
It's one of the 'secret ingredients of good authentic curries.
Better put a pun in:
Q: How does a priest who's an enthusiastic ornithologist begin a service?
A: Let osprey!
And if his church got shot up, would he get caught in the crossfire?!!
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
Thanks for the "secret info".
> Better put a pun in:
>
> Q: How does a priest who's an enthusiastic ornithologist begin a service?
>
> A: Let osprey!
>
> And if his church got shot up, would he get caught in the crossfire?!!
>
Probably would.
HJ
nemo
<hones...@centurytel.net> wrote in message
news:UeudnQ9eZdlJCfPV...@centurytel.net...
And if it's Vindaloo and it splashes . . . Great Balls of Fire!!!!!!
>
Lens....DAMNED GOOD BUT WEIRD!!
As long as you keep the fore-and-aft axis horizontal it's fine. Very wide
sensible pics. I'm gettin a tripod and a spirit level the fits into teh
flash Hot Shoe for that.
Tilt it up or down and the world goes crazy though! Great for trick shots!
http://www.sigmaphoto.com/lenses/lenses_all_details.asp?id=3301&navigator=6
Enter "Sigma 10-20mm" into Google Images. In between all the pics of the
lens itself there are a few good eggs ampoules of what it's taken.
hones...@centurytel.net
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass.wet> wrote in message
Lawdy!...Lawdy!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:42BA6E4B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > Stan Jensen wrote:
> >
> > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > >
> > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > night light.
> >
> > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
> >
> > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
>
> Sounds like they don't know what they're Darwin!
The Empire bans stem cell research and abortion.
The Empire is found to have suppressed evidence on global warming.
The Old Republic had a subprime mortgage crisis which triggered a deep
recession, helping Palpatine consolidate his power.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:46818930...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > Stan Jensen wrote:
> >
> > > Biggest Surprises in the New "Star Wars" Movie
> > >
> > > Anakin is actually afraid of the dark and uses his lightsaber as a
> > > night light.
> >
> > Sith Lords actually fight with Dark Sabers.
>
> And their boss is a Lighth Vader?
>
> >
> > The Empire bans the teaching of evolution in schools.
>
> So do parts of the US - in spite of the obvious resemblance between
> Dubbaya's facial expressions and those of a chimpanzee!
>
> Or perhaps because of them.
>
> >
> > The Republic Supreme Court declared Palpatine to be Chancellor after a
> > close election.
> >
> > Diebold supplies voting machines to the Republic.
>
> Very difficult to Diebold. You can be very couragious beforehand foot toe
> and knee, but at the point of death, the mast vajority of people are very
> scared and humble, innit?!!
>
> >
> > The Republic's Senate passed a "Galactic Patriot Act" and also set up a
> > "Home Galaxy Security Department".
>
> Finally time for "Spaceballs 2 - The Search for More Money" perhaps?
Senator Padme called for the impeachment of Chancellor Palpatine.
Thousands of Palpatine opponents sent messages on Twitter protesting
Palpatine's election as fraudulent.