Review: Rocky and Bullwinkle (2000)
Mark O'Hara
A Multigenre Review
Dear Jay Ward,
I don’t think you would turn over in your grave if you saw the new
incarnation of your 1960’s cartoon. The actor Robert DeNiro and a friend of
his produced The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle, and they did a pretty
good job. DeNiro took the role of Fearless Leader for himself, and he
brings it off well. Why? Because he does it with a lot of humor and is not
afraid to send up even himself (in a “You talking to me?” takeoff of his
Travis Bickle role in Taxi Driver). Funny stuff
I like that Des McAnuff, the director, makes the humans play second fiddle
to the animated stars. The rounded, smooth, balloon-like skin of the
animated flying squirrel and the bird-brained moose adds a very watchable
dimension. You would be glad to hear that June Foray is back as Rock’s
voice, that unique, thinly hoarse touch intact. And since you can’t do the
moose, Australian Keith Scott is a great second choice; he also does the
narrator, with a flair just short of the talent of William Conrad. Anyhoo,
the “Moose and Skvorl!” were the funniest and noblest characters in the
piece.
Sincerely,
A Fan and Reviewer
* * * *
Bullwinkle’s Monologue
I don’t understand. Why would that Minnie Mogul (Janeane Garofalo) the
movie producer want to deal with Fearless Leader and his gang anyway? She
surely wouldn’t do it for the money! Suddenly Fearless Leader is real
(played by Bobby DeNiro, I think), and Boris Badenov (Jason Alexander) and
Natasha Fatale (Rene Russo) are out to turn the television viewers of
American into mindless zombies! What a silly idea, losing the ability to
think because you watch too much television! Rocky and I were just
wandering around Frostbite Falls Minnesota, where all the trees were cut
down and the cartoon population were all out of work, our cartoon
“messterpiece” canceled back in 1964. So something really realistic had to
happen, and sure enough, this nice-looking blond FBI agents (the FBI has a
lot like her, I’d wager!) named Karen Sympathy (Piper Perabo) magically gets
Rock and me to appear in Hollywood. What she wants us to do is get to New
York City in time to stop Fearless Leader from making his final broadcast,
in which he plans to zombify the whole country, and get them to vote for him
for President! What a ride (car ride, that is) Rock and I have ahead of us
– although I still can’t figure out why we couldn’t have gotten ahold or a
plane or something else. After all, Boris and Natasha steal a helicopter
and almost succeed in reducing me and Rock to Internet images with that
teeny satellite computer thingy.
* * * *
The cameos are the coolest thing
They make the comedy truly ring
Billy Crystal is no hack
With a mattress on his back
Carl Reiner shows his teeth
Even though it’s much too brief
Don Novello adds to the corn
By making the two stars go airborne
Typical wackiness is displayed
By FBI director Randy Quaid
Kenan Thompson and Kel Mitchell play
College students who save the day
But at this cameo craft
Jonathan Winters is most daft
He plays no less than three weirdos
In this mad world he get kudos
* * * *
June 30, 2000
Memo to Production Staff
We’ll find out today if America remembers this goofy duo. Will it be a hit,
like George of the Jungle, or a miss, like The Adventures of Dudley Doright?
(At least we don’t have to pay Bredan Fraser’s salary again!) Although I
wonder about getting really talented actors like Rene Russo and Jason
Alexander, and then underusing them. After all, who did you see more of in
the cartoon – here Fearless Leader gets more lines than Boris and Natasha
combined! And what about this side plot in which the agent and our heroes
go on trial. It’s not a bad punch line with the moose, but the whole arrest
things drags just a bit, I think. In a sequel, if we get the box office to
pitch one, it’ll be more action and even more bad puns. So I brought my own
kids to the preview, and they loved it. We saw every age from babies to
baby boomers in the theater. I just hope not all theaters keep jacking up
the prices: our neighborhood multiplex (is that an oxymoron?) raised
admission to $4.50 for matinees!
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