FOOB- The RetCON Continues . . .
Antonio E. Gonzalez
<http://www.fborfw.com/news/003316.php>
******************************************
It was late one evening in December that Anthony came home full of
music and high spirits from the elementary school Christmas Concert.
For the first time, he had been given a small solo part. It had been
scary, but he had done OK. Lots of people had praised him afterward.
It was disappointing that neither of his parents had been there,
though. His father worked long hours at year-end, so his absence
wasn't a surprise. But Anthony had been unhappy when his mother
decided at the last minute that she didn’t feel well enough to go. Now
he was eager to tell her the story of his success.
He stepped into the house to see his father slumped on the couch, hair
and shirt rumpled and an empty glass in his hand. He was glowering at
the unlit Christmas tree. Anthony stopped short in bewilderment. He'd
never seen his father anything but neat and in control. The man
slouched in their living room looked like a stranger.
Something was wrong. He swallowed back his fear. "Where’s Mom?"
"Gone." His father lifted his glass and almost casually flung it
against the stone wall of the fireplace. It shattered, sending
glittering shards flying to bury themselves in the deep blue plush of
the carpet.
"G – gone? Where?"
"Who bloody cares?" His father heaved himself out of the chair and
stood looking down at him, his eyes bleak. "She couldn’t stand it any
more. That’s what she said. Couldn’t stand me." He shrugged and
laughed bitterly. "She can’t stand you, either, because you’re turning
out like me. How do you like that?"
He stiffened as Anthony caught his breath. "No. Don’t you dare cry for
her. You start bawling now, Tony, I swear I'll pitch you out of this
house. There’s been enough dramatics around here to last me a
lifetime."
******************************************
During that tumultuous fall and winter, Liz became the fixed centre of
Anthony's world, the one person he could count on for steadfast
friendship. Even though he was growing again, getting taller and
skinnier and more geeky and beaky, despite the humiliation of being
hassled by some of the jocks at school as a nerd and a loser, even if
he felt like an outsider in his own home, Liz seemed to like him just
the same. He came to rely on her so much that it scared him.
--
- ReFlex76
- "Let's beat the terrorists with our most powerful weapon . . . hot girl-on-girl action!"
- "The difference between young and old is the difference between looking forward to your next birthday, and dreading it!"
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<http://reflex76.blogspot.com/>
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Katana > Chain Saw > Baseball Bat > Hammer
cryptoguy
> Turns out there's more backstory to Anthony . . .:
>
> <http://www.fborfw.com/news/003316.php>
>
Please, how can I un-read this?
Peter Trei
Scooter
Me too. ::shudder:: It's like....Funkyfied.
Ted Nolan <tednolan>
Getting hit on the head with a coconut will usually induce amnesia..
Ted
--
------
columbiaclosings.com
What's not in Columbia anymore..
J.D. Baldwin
In the previous article, cryptoguy <treif...@gmail.com> wrote:
> On Aug 5, 2:12=A0am, Antonio E. Gonzalez <AntEGM...@aol.com> wrote:
> > =A0 =A0 =A0Turns out there's more backstory to Anthony . . .:
> >
> > =A0 <http://www.fborfw.com/news/003316.php>
> >
> [snipped]
>
> Please, how can I un-read this?
Diff'rent strokes, I guess. I find myself heartened that *someone*
managed to escape the Foobiverse. God bless you, Mrs. Caine, wherever
you are.
--
_+_ From the catapult of |If anyone disagrees with any statement I make, I
_|70|___:)=}- J.D. Baldwin |am quite prepared not only to retract it, but also
\ / bal...@panix.com|to deny under oath that I ever made it. -T. Lehrer
***~~~~-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Martina
Wow. When I first read this I thought it was someone's snarky riff on
a backstory. That is is the official retcon is kind of creepy.
racs...@gmail.com
Moi aussi. This is freakin' sick.
I think Michael wrote it. THAT'S how freaking sick it is.
That said, it's nice to know that Liz is marrying an emotional
basketcase with all sorts of unresolved bullshit that he's never
really dealt with. Who needs a husband when you can sign up for your
very own patient?
The plus side, of course, is that this needy m*****f***** will never
leave her, and that's what really matters. Sometimes, men leave their
women. That's bad. You need to find a man who won't leave you. Look at
Iris -- damn, that girl has got it made!!!
Someone make it stop. Please.
Mike Peterson
http://nellieblogs.blogspot.com
aemeijers
>
(snip)
> The plus side, of course, is that this needy m*****f***** will never
> leave her, and that's what really matters. Sometimes, men leave their
> women. That's bad. You need to find a man who won't leave you. Look at
> Iris -- damn, that girl has got it made!!!
>
> Someone make it stop. Please.
>
> Mike Peterson
> http://nellieblogs.blogspot.com
One of the papers I read tried, as part of their last 'enhancement' of
the comic pages. Within a week, due to reader protests, they brought it
back. Guess people wanna see this train wreck through to the end. Paper
said they would revisit the situation after the wedding, and after the
various other strips currently on vacation came back.
I'll forgive Lynn all her sins if she has the guts to do a 'Graduate'
style surprise ending to the ceremony.
--
aem sends...
nickelshrink
This may sound weird after my vehement opposition to the
Lizthony pairup, and it doesn't mean i've reconsidered. But
Liz has led Anthony on to a point at which it would now be
way too cruel for her to ditch him à la Elaine Robinson. Yeah,
even though he's emotionally impaired, he does really care -
he's not looking for an accessory like Elaine's fiancé was.
So it's reached a point where there's nothing but a
Costco-sized case of Charmin [tm] behind either Door #1 or
Door #2. Now if there's a cool sci fi alternate universe or a
kid with a snow globe behind Door #3, and Lynn flings it
open, i *will* cheer.
--
pax,
ruth
Save trees AND money! Buy used books!
http://stores.ebay.com/Noir-and-More-Books-and-Trains
unMichael
> aemeijers wrote:
Isn't the wedding taking place about the same time as the Large
Hadrion Collider goes online?
unMichael
> Isn't the wedding taking place about the same time as the Large
> Hadrion Collider goes online?
Oh, Margo! "Hadron"
cryptoguy
Maybe it'll make some strangelets and destroy the
universe, preventing us from seeing The Wedding.
...nah, we couldn't be that lucky.
Peter Trei
Veronique
I saw this at the FOOB site and thought the same thing: apparently
someone's suckered Lynn in with the perfect snark.
V.
--
Veronique Chez Sheep
unMichael
Well, FOOB isn't *that* bad.
I was thinking that maybe in the context of the story, it could rip a
hole in the fabric of space that would transpose Warren and Anthony.
Hey, it's about as believable as Mike's success.
On second thought, I wouldn't wish Liz on Warren.
Bill Marcum
There are worse ways you could have misspelled that word.
Odds are, when the Large Hadrion Collider goes online, it'll be just
another brick in the wall.
parto the p
wrote:
> Diff'rent strokes, I guess. I find myself heartened that *someone*
> managed to escape the Foobiverse. God bless you, Mrs. Caine, wherever
> you are.
> --
And we have Wednesday's Maudlin Trash Into Decorative Decoupage
Lemonade Pitcher winner!
I relieved myself of the burden of reading FOOB many months ago, but I
peeked at this... creation when I saw this thread and all I can say
is, The Fist of Ham, terrifying is its might.
And now, Anthony's Wedding Night Retcon Confessional to Liz:
"It was horrible, Liz. It seems like it was only yesterday...
Anthony: But why, why are you leaving me??
Therese: Because I can't stand you anymore Anthony, you or that little
bawling whelp. She's going to learn to count someday, I just know it.
Just. Like. You. She already disgusts me.
Anthony: But she's just a baby...
Therese: YOUR baby Anthony
*knock knock*
Therese: There's MY baby now. She's picking me up to take me away from
all this.
Anthony: "She"? What do you mean...
(Therese answers the door)
Therese: Come in darling, I was just packing my bags.
Anthony: MOM?? You're leaving me for my mother??
The Ex-Mrs. Caine: Oh. Hello Francoise.
Anthony: It's "Anthony". "Francoise" was the puppy you had put to
sleep when I was three for eating his dog food without his pinky
extended. Oh, it's the name of my daughter too...
TEMC: You managed to breed? How utterly horrid. How could you Therese?
Therese: It's a long story; he just kept whining. I'm ready, let's get
out of this dump.
Anthony: Oh no, I have no hoooooome! Again.
parto the p
unMichael
POTD, and I want an Ex-Mrs. Caine spin-off series.
Andrew Ryan Chang
Do people still MST-ify deserving work?
--
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though you were consuming a mere peanut, or an olive. Rather, think of it
as though you were consuming, say, a banana.
Foreword to "Learning Perl", Larry Wall
Weird Beard
the following in rec.arts.comics.strips:
You can retcon it so that it was read by the "you" from Earth II.
--
"It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that certain je-ne-sais-quoi."
Peter Schickele
Peter B. Steiger
> You can retcon it so that it was read by the "you" from Earth II.
Or his evil twin.
--
Peter B. Steiger
Cheyenne, WY
If you must reply by email, you can reach me by placing zeroes where
you see stars: wypbs.**1 at gmail.com (yes, that's a new address)
** Posted from http://www.teranews.com **
Andrew Ryan Chang
>On Tue, 12 Aug 2008 13:09:52 +0000, Weird Beard sez:
>> You can retcon it so that it was read by the "you" from Earth II.
>
>Or his evil twin.
So, Earth-3?
--
... the real Rabbi Hillel taught the 12-year-old Jesus to
inspire, that is to rally-raise-train-evolve-unite-UNITE the whole
Human race, lightning-like in our almighty Eternal Father's great
All-One-God-Faith! For we're All-One or none! -Dr Bronner
johndun...@gmail.com
>Peter B. Steiger <see...@for.email.address> wrote:
>>On Tue, 12 Aug 2008 13:09:52 +0000, Weird Beard sez:
>>> You can retcon it so that it was read by the "you" from Earth II.
>>
>>Or his evil twin.
>
>So, Earth-3?
More like Earth-51 complete with the all carnage just before Monarch destroyed it and the great
disaster happened.
-
John Duncan Yoyo
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