RAB Survival Guide; The Yttrx Special Reserve Collection
yttrx
Note: Remember what I said, freaks. I'm not replying to anything
on this newsgroup publically. This doesnt count. I told you I'd
post an essay or FAQ from time to time. So dont even start.
Yttrx's rec.arts.bodayrt Survival Guide
Part One: What is rec.arts.bodyart?
Rec.arts.bodyart is a newsgroup for freaks who like to pointed sticks
shoved into their bodies for the purpose of permanent pictures and/or
non/semi-permanent perforations held open by metal or wood or
something.
Part Two: Who posts to rec.arts.bodyart?
A bunch of freaks. A few immature whiners. A couple two three
piercers. A tattoo artist here and there. One or two self important
twats. Some wise men. Some wise women. An evil clown. About a
zillion computer programmers/analysts/system administrators/tech
support people. A sideshow weirdo or five.
Part Three: Should I post to rec.arts.bodyart?
Not if you're a fucking idiot. If you're a fucking idiot, GO AWAY.
We're all full up. If you're anything other than a fucking idiot,
by all means post. We'd all like very much to read what you have
to type. Except if you have a question thats been asked a million
times already. We hate that. Look, if you have any doubts, or you
are about to begin your post with something like "I know this has
probably been asked a million times" or "I'm sorry if this has been
asked before" go immediately to dejanews and LOOK IT UP. Dont be
a clueless ninny. And dont ask about how to use dejanews either.
Part Four: What kinda stuff usually gets posted?
Heres a fairly good cross section of quotes from recent threads:
"Hello there, I'm new to RAB and from what i've seen i like it very much
so far. Just thought I'd introduce myself and my piercings & tats.
Piercings: 00ga in left lobe, 14(soon to be 12 or 10)ga CBR in right
lobe. 10ga(soon to be 8) in tongue, 14ga CBR in navel, and 14ga(soon to
be 12) PA. Also soon getting an ampallang thanks to my girlfriend being
a piercer. :)"
"My piercing jewelry never sets off the metal detectors, but the eyelets in my
Doc Martens always seems to.
But maybe it does- I should say that I always beep at the detectors, but the
hand wand only beeps at my boots, not at any of my extremeties...;-) you may
be luckier than me, though..."
"5. All females will have unhingable jaw implants immediately apon their
15th birthdays"
"To quote Alice Walker (author of Warrior Marks a book on FGM, and other famous
works) - "Torture is not culture.""
"Right. Like we believe this."
Alright, im being nice. Admittedly, RAB occasionally gets consumed by
in-fighting and general cattiness.
Alright, im being nice still. The fact is that rab occasionally degenerates
into a bunch of screaming little girls sticking gum in eachother's hair.
The fact is also that most of the time it isnt like that; most of the
time its a bastion of valuble information and lasting friendships.
Most of the time.
Part Five:
How to avoid elitism
Every time a group of people with a similar interest clump together for the
purpose of sharing and exploring that interest, elitism is inevitable. Most
of the cause of this is, I think, the tendency of humans that have clustered
to 'peck' at those individuals that they see as 'weak' or 'different'. This
is very natural for humans, so dont let it get you down. In this particular
venue, the tendency is (rather commonly, I suspect) to caltrop a specific
type of newbie; namely the 'Friggin Idiot'. The Friggin Idiot is the kind of
newbie who makes some, most, or all of the following assumptions:
-RAB exists solely to serve them
-RAB is a venue where all knowledge is shared freely and without a fight
-RAB consists of friendly and calm individuals who want to help you
-RAB consists of people who are interested in what theyre selling
-RAB consists of people who are demented and sorely in need of professional
counseling.
-RAB is the end-all be-all of knowledge and information concerning piercing,
tattooing, implants, branding, scarification, suspensions, geeking, block-
heading, fire eating, head splitting, subincision, amputation, etc.
Another tendency that makes itself quite apparant to the more experienced
denzien of RAB is stratification. There is a definitive level system to RAB
which allows for slow ascension for those patient enough to endure it.
At the top of this system are a handful of extremely old and experienced
posters who find themselves the subject of the idolatry of the populous of
the levels below them. Mostly, theyve achieved this status by contributing
large amounts of valuble information to the RAB and bodyart communities
at large for a very long period of time. Occasionally an individual rises
to this level by simply being around longer than anyone can remember.
The levels below this mirror the one on top; at every level there exists
the idolatry of all of the levels above it, to a degree reflecting the
distance of the level idolatrized to their own.
Elitism within this complex stratification is common. Its most usually
regarded with multiple grains of salt, but occasionally ends up in
very long threads concerning something along the lines of the number
of lines in one's sig file. The most common reason for this is something
which should be avoided at all costs, except by the most experienced
RABbits:
Level jumping.
Level jumping occurs when an individual within a level that is not the
uppermost one 'jumps' upward on their own volition. Repeatedly challenging
(disagreeing, flaming, pointing out that they to shit in the woods;
its different for every case) a denzien of a level above theirs is the
most common way of 'jumping'. This almost always results in absolutely
nothing; the member of the lower level stays at their level, the member
of the upper level stays at their level, there are no hard feelings and
no one is the worse for wear. Every once in a while however, it results
in a clash which depending on severity, may result in anything from some
hurt feelings and static leveling to extreme anger and one or both RABbits
'fucking off'.
Avoiding the elitism of RAB is very simple: Dont take it too seriously.
If your feelings get hurt, take five. Calm down. Think before you post
something which could pull other RABbits into the fray. Those RABbits
who consistently play well with others and post responsibly end up being
some of the happiest and most respected of them all. They also tend to
ascend through the strata quickly and easily, and without offense.
Part Six:
The Lifecycle of a RABbit
Here is a run down of the birth and development of the Common Internet
RABbit:
1. The Lurk
The would be RABbit keeps their mouths shut and just reads every post
they can for a period of time. This is recommended for ALL would be
RABbits.
2. The De-Lurk
The RABbit is born. On this joyous occasion, the brand spanking-new
RABbit makes their very first post, usually something along the lines
of 'Hi im new here, ive been lurking for a while, and heres my mods'
or 'hey-ho, ive been lurking for a while, ive got a piercing coming
up and I need some advice'. Sometimes the infant RABbit makes a
complete fool of themselves on the De-Lurk. The strong refuse to
fall back into a still-birth and continue learning and posting. This
is recommended for ALL RABbits.
3. The Questioner RABbit
This RABbits got a million and one questions, and asks them all at
once in a downpour of posts that annoys everyone. This is an
extremely important stage in the development of the RABbit. Most of
the information that they gain about bodyart (at least for a long
while) is gained at this stage. Enduring the barrage of "How long
till I can talk again after I get my tongue pierced" and "how much
will my labret hurt when I get it pierced", etc is one of the many
gauntlets that the adult RABbit must run.
4. The Answerer RABbit
This RABbits got a million answers, half of them wrong, and posts
them all at once in a downpour that annoys everyone. This is also
an extremely important stage in the development of the RABbit.
The reaction of the populous of RAB to their answers along with
their own will shape their adult RABbit persona. Their opinionated
and egotistical attitudes will melt away if all goes well, and then
one AND ONLY ONE of the following two stages will occur:
5. The Social RABbit
The Social RABbit has pretty much stopped asking questions as well as
stopped answering them, and posts almost solely to talk to their
friends. Very amusing threads often result on topics including
beer, fun lines from movies, the latest skinny on what some famous
piercer/tattoo artist is doing, and detailed essays on more
advanced body modifications. The Social RABbit is locked in place
and development stops until the last stage.
5a. The Idol RABbit
The Idol RABbit is a RABbit who has decided to forego the Social
route (mostly, occasionally they cross over) and gives themselves
to offering massive amounts of information or services or both
to the RABbit/bodyart community. This is the very pinnacle of the
forementioned stratification of RAB. The group of Idol RABbits
includes well known performers, tattoo artists, piercers, magazine/
ezine editors and archivists.
6. The Geriatric RABbit
This RABbit doesnt post too much anymore, and when they do its
usually something brief and on topic. Theyve found other things to
do besides post to RAB and are almost always off doing them. There
is a due amount of respect for these RABbits; they are the 'silver-
backs' of our warren and they deserve to be treated right.
7. The Dead RABbit
This is a RABbit who has stopped posting for a variety of reasons
including Real Life (TM), sudden and permanent lack of internet
access, sudden and permanent lack of interest, and 'jumping'.
Respect them. A large clump of them used to be Idol RABbits and
deserve to have nice things said about them.
Part 7:
A bit of advice
Rec.arts.bodyart is a newsgroup. As such, it consists only of
very large ascii files. Ascii cant hurt you. Ascii is your friend.
Ascii is valuble. Ascii is full of useful and valuble information.
Treat ascii with respect. And above all:
THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE
-----yttrx