Ranma 1/2:.....After All This Time?! [FanFic]

[William Baird]

wba...@nmsu.edu (William Baird)

Old Comments:
>This is my first fan fiction. Please bear-with. There's a quick section
>lifted driectly from Christian Gadekan's fanfic of "Day Dreams" in the
>beginning. I freely acknowledge this and wanted to comment saying it
>Comments welcome and more than encouraged! I'm afraid I lack
>experience with writing (if you are in rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan,
>my only other bit of fanfiction, the Last Scene Contest for the Wheel of
>Time series, is present. Ask for it from Good Ole Auntie (if nutty as a
>fruit cake) Erica. She'll produce it and the others she's saved.

New Comments:

I cleaned this up a bit for typo's and such. So I thought I'd repost it
for the archives.

Enjoy!
Will Baird
wba...@nmsu.edu

PS The series prolly won't go where you think it will....hehe. Wait and
see. (^-^)

PPS: Please excuse any misspellings, etc. Word was acting screwy
when I wrote this....then again, when doesn't it?



********Ranma 1/2: After all This Time.....?!************************

(Part 1)

Akane: HENTAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(seen pulls back from Akanes fist and rotates to see through a shattered
window Ranma flying away from the house upside down and obviously in
pain. P-chan is sitting on the desk quite satisfied at seeing Ranma
flying through the night.)

Akane: (looking furious and thinking) I wish he'd grow up and die! He
is such a pervert!(looking more furious)(remembering)
[(We see the situation from her point of view. Things are dark.
Her dream is a very pleasant one:

Ranma was just finishing off an enormous meal which he had, in
typical fashion, bolted down like a starving wolf. As he finished
bolting the last bowl of rice, he sat back with a satisfied sigh.
"Delicious," he pronounced, turning to look at her. "Akane,
you win."

She hears a noise and awakens. Ranma's hand is descending towards her
chest. . .obviously, especially to a sleepy Akane, that he's about to
do something perverted. . . . .and equally obviously having nothing to
do with P-chan being there.)

Ranma (aware she's awake): Uhhhh....Akane.....it's uhhh....not what you
think.....(hand twitches he looks down at her frozen in place).

Akane (growling): RANMA!!!!!! (she swings at him)

Ranma (narrowly dodging bounces away from her towards her door and out
of reach): Akane! Wait! I'm trying to show you something!

(P-chan attacks him and he stumbles closer to Akane trying to dodge.
Akane has, in the mean time, stood up and is now facing Ranma.)

Akane (fuming): I'm sure you were going to show me something! YOU PERVERT!

Ranma (trying to reach for the kettle of water on her desk): Just wait
one second!!!!! (he races his hand to grab the kettle, but P-chan jumps
up and bites it) Aaaaaaaaiiiieeeeeeeee!! (He throws P-chan away from
his hand and in the process knocks the kettle over.....P-chan flies in to
the window though not hard enough to break it) AH, Nuuu----!

Akane: HENTAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Akane punches Ranma and sends him into
a ballistic trajectory).]

Akane (sighing): One day things will work out. One way or another. (she
looks out at the smashed window towards where Ranma went flying) I just
hope it works out for the better for us, Ranma. (looks sad and doesn't
notice P-chan drooping more than soggy ramen).

(lights click out as we finally hear a thud of Ranma landing)

Ranma: Kawaikune girl! Gah. (he shakes his fist at the window)
Ryouga....P-chan! I'll get you yet! (he staggers into the household).

(The sun rises on the Tendo household. Ranma and Genma are sparring out
above the pond in back. Kasumi wanders by the back door and pauses
smiling at the Saotomes. She hurries on)

Genma: You're weak, Ranma! How can you expect to be worthy of marrying
Akane and taking over this dojo unless your a true martial artist?!

Ranma: Oh yeah? Who says I'm so weak, Pops? I've kept you from
splashing me today! Besides, who wants to marry that kawaikune girl
anyways? her cooking is enough to kill - - - ERK!

( *SPLASH* Ranma falls forward and into the Pond. Akane stands with her
mallet in place where Ranma was. Ranma pulls himself up and stands in
the pond.)

Akane: Now whose the kawaikune, hentai-chan?

Ranma-chan: grrrrrr.....

(Genma starts laughing. Akane spins on her heel, her mallet
mysteriously gone, as usual, and scoops up P-chan while stalking
inside. Ranma stares after her glaring for a moment. He snaps out of
it when he realizes that Genma is laughing hysterically at him.)

Ranma-chan: What are you laughing at, old man?

Genma: Now. . .. (laugh) whose. . . . .(wheeze). . . .the . . .
(chortle) sloppy one? (laughs hysterically at Ranma. . . until he gets
splashed)

Ranma-chan (looks insufferably cute and satisfied): As you were saying?

Genma-panda: growl...rowl.....(whips out sign) 'At least I didn't get hit
by a woman!'

Ranma-chan: (pulls apart her shirt) and what, pray tell, are THESE?????
(gets angry) stupid old man. I may be a guy, but I happen to be part
woman no thanks to you. (stomps up to the house and into the bathroom)

(We see the Tendo's and Saotome's eating breakfast. Akane refuses to
speak to Ranma. P-chan glares at him over her shoulder. Ranma doesn't
really notice because he's glaring at his father. Genma-panda is
munching on some bamboo and glaring back. Mr. Tendo eats and drinks
while reading the paper and being oblivious to it all. The morning is
shaping up to be another typical one for the Tendo Dojo.)

Nabiki: Ranma......Akane......I've asked you guys time and again to
please be quiet while we sleep.....what you do at night is your own
business, but the rest of us would like a good night's sleep....if only just
occasionally. (looks a little bit desperate) (looks at the two of them
ignoring her)

Kasumi (interjecting): It's not right. Mother wouldn't approve, Akane.
Your mother wouldn't either, Ranma. Please. Don't do this. . . . .

(it's obvious that Akane and Ranma have learned to tune them out and
that this is nothing new for wither of them since they just ignore both
Nabiki and Kasumi)

Genma-panda (flashing a sign): 'Good going son!'

Soun: A little initiative, son, that's all it takes....

Kasumi: FATHER! It's not right.

Nabiki (looking haggard): SHUTUP!

(Everyone blinks at Nabiki. . . . .even Akane and Ranma)

Nabiki: Ranma. Akane. Name your price. If you guys can be quiet for a
week I'll PAY you. I can't take these morning wars or the lack of sleep
any longer.

Ranma: Hmmmm....how much are we talking here, Nabiki?

Akane (looking surprised, glares at Ranma): RANMA! (turns to Nabiki) No,
Nabiki...it's okay. If you'll keep this Hentai away from me at night,
everything will be quiet, I promise.

Ranma: HEY! Whose calling who a hentai?!?!?!?!? Besides, who'd wanna
visit such a kawaikune tom-boy like you in the middle of the night. .
.well, other than your darling little hentai, P-chan. (looking at
P-chan) Eh, P-chan?

(P-chan struggles in Akane's grasp and kwee's almost violently)

Akane (getting angry): R_A_N_M_A! (she take out her mallet from nowhere
and starts to raise it one handed). WHOSE CALLING WHO UN-CUTE??????
(fury paints her face)

(P-chan looks at Akane and looks at Ranma and struggles loose for fear
of his life)

Ranma (smiles sweetly at her): (jabs her in the nose) You really ARE
cute when you get mad, you know that?

(Everybody facefaults. Akane drops the mallet and looks shocked).

(Ranma grins at Akane and stands up.)

Ranma: I better go get my books for school. (winks at Akane and pokes
her in the nose) Gotcha. (tries to run out the room)

Akane (VERY ANGRY) (grabs the table; Kasumi amazingly clears it before
Akane can tip it too far) RANMA!!!!!!!!! DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (slams the
table down on top of Ranma just before he gets out of reach while
everybody dodges out of the way)

Ranma (twitching underneath the table): Erk! How......Ack.....kawaikune
......uhhhh....of you.....gah.

(Akane hops on the table and stomps down HARD once. She scrabbles off
and goes to her room. . .apparently crying)

Soun (from behind his paper): You really ought to get along with your
fiancee better, son. It'll smooth things out for your future.

(scene fades out with Ranma twitching and everybody complaining at
him.....including Kasumi)

Akane: (shouting) RANMA!!!!!!! HURRY!!!!!!! We're going to be late for
school!

Ranma: I'm coming, I'm coming. (he darts down the hall and out the
front gate).

(They stick their tongues out at each other as they run out the door and
nearly into each other)

Akane: Hentai!

Ranma: Kawaikune!

(scene: Ranma is walking on the top of the fence and Akane below.
They're talking surprisingly civilly to each other for the things that
happened earlier)

Akane: Ranma. . . .

Ranma: Yeah, Akane?

Akane: Why do we fight all the time?

Ranma: What do you expect? We can't stand each other? You think I'm a
pervert and you're such a tomboy. We both happen to see each other as
enemies more than friends...we hardly see each other as an engaged
couple would. . . and cuz we're martial artists. We tend to get
physical with it. . ..

Akane: (quietly) Do you really think I'm uncute?

Ranma: What do you expect when you are such a tomboy.....

Akane: We can call off this engagement if you really feel that way
Ranma. . .our parents don't have the power to make us go through with
it. We can just wait until we're legally adults and call the whole
thing off.....

Ranma: Uhhh....I never said....ummmm.....I. . .Akane, I think we ought
to. . .ummmm uhhh....(can't get it out as usual)

Akane: Ranma? (looking up at him surprised and hopeful)

(they stop and stare at each other for a moment. Ranma looking
uncomfortable and unsure of himself. Akane is looking up with
apprehension and hope. Then he closes his eyes and calms himself. He
reopens them. Ranma smiles and opens his mouth. He's about to say
something when. . . .CRASH)

Shampoo: NIHAO, Ranma! Why Ranma on Shampoo's bike path again? (looks
thoughtful for a moment) AH! Ranma here to take Shampoo on date!

Akane (getting mad): No. He's not Shampoo.

Shampoo: (give she attitude of doing a Nyneave *sniff* without actually
doing it) Go away, violent girl. Ranma no want date Akane. Ranma
going to marry Shampoo, not uncute girl like you.

(Shampoo still hasn't moved from on top of Ranma. . .who is in quite some pain)

Akane (getting really mad): GET OFF HIM SHAMPOO!

Ranma: asdkjfjakdji9wjdf

Shampoo: Shampoo no do what she told by violent wench Akane. Not
even Ranma listen to such a tomboy.

Akane (explodes): DIE, SHAMPOO!!!! (swings her magically appearing
mallet at her)

Shampoo (quite shocked, was expecting her to attack Ranma not her
attempts to get off her bike but slips when Ranma twitches the wrong
way). AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Her balance saves her from
falling, for the moment. . .but Akane's mallet hits the bike's wheel and
it tumbles, with Shampoo, to the ground. Shampoo rolls down the hill in
shock (she was just beaten by Akane!) and rolls into the water at the
bottom of the drainage ditch).

(Ranma, implanted on the fence doesn't quite take the fall....he's
swaying badly though and looks to fall at any moment).

Akane (worried): Ranma? Are you okay?

Ranma: uhhhh....

Akane (reaches for Ranma, but due to the fact she's a bit on the clumsy
side, she knocks him off and he falls down into the water too): RANMA!

(Ranma comes to just before hitting the water and looks relieved).

Ranma: Whew! Close call there!

(Shampoo-cat crawls out of the water and shakes her incredibly soaked
feet off all over Ranma).

Ranma-chan (running away screaming): AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Shampoo-cat gives chase)

Akane (sighing, speaking to herself): Oh, Ranma. . .I wish you'd grow up
or die. . . either way it'd sort out things. (twinkle in her eye,
collects Ranma's bag) I'd prefer the first though. . . we are engaged. . .
(looks thoughtful) You re a pervert, but your my pervert. Now if I
could convince you of that. . . .

(she sighs and walks towards Furikan High School clutching Ranma's bags
close and hoping).

(The scene fades out)

(The day progresses slowly. We see the scene fade into Akane
demonstrating for the class, though not to her knowledge, how to cook in
Home Ec; we see Ukyou giving a small speech for her class; we see Ranma
dozing; we see Nabiki extorting still more cash from Kunou for pictures
of he pig-tailed goddess and Akane. Finally, lunch rolls around).

(Ranma and crew pile out of their class rooms for their lockers, looking
for food. Ranma dashes over to his and opens his backpack in hopes of
some of Kasumi's del. . .but finds nothing)

Akane (just happening to pass by): Looking for something? Oh, too bad
that Kasumi forgot your lunch. . . .(waves a second bag of food at him
and takes off running).

Ranma: Why you!!!!!!!!! (takes off after her)

(She darts around a corner giggling and laughing at him. Ranma calls
after her shouting screaming about his lunch. He rounds the corner at
top speed and runs smack into Kunou. Ranma is unbalanced and stumbling
backwards.)

Kunou (startled and looking for a fight): The vengeance of heaven is
slow but sure. . .you cur. (lashing out with his bokken, Kunou attacks
Ranma) RELEASE THE PIG TAILED GODDESS!!!!!!!!

(Ranma deflects the blows, but is still unsteady. Kunou slips one good
one through and hooks Ranma's leg while he's still unbalanced. Ranma
gets tripped good and stumbles over. Unfortunately, the window's open
and he stumbles up to it and right out it.)

(Akane runs up to the window.)

Akane: RANMA!!!!!!!!!! (she darts away from the window and runs down
the stairs like a first rate Olympic athlete. She makes it down to the
bottom floor (three flights of stairs can be a bit hard to do especially
when the school is full) and comes to where Ranma landed. . .worried
that something might have happened to him. she stands around looking
for him, but can't find him)).

(A voice): Psst!

Akane (looking a lil confused): Huh?

(The voice again): Up here!

(Akane looks up and sees Ranma-chan in the trees. . . . .near the pool.
Akane realizes that she must have misjudged where Ranma fell out and
that he must have fallen in the pool. . .again. . . . .)

Ranma-chan: Akane. . .could you get me some hot water, please?

Akane (a little angry): Why should I you big jerk?

Ranma-chan: Please?

Akane: all right. One condition.

Ranma-chan (looking defensive): Yeah, what is it?

Akane: We have lunch together. That's what I had planned anyways. .
.that's why I swiped your lunch, so. . . I want lunch with you today.
All right? No lunch. No hot water.

Ranma-chan (muttering to herself): All right. That's not so bad. I
can live with that. (calling down to Akane). Okay, Akane. I'll eat
with ya just get me the hot water.

Akane: No body else with us, Ranma! Got that? It's alone between us,
and us only.....she darts back to the nurse's office for some hot water.

Ranma-chan (climbs away from the visible sections of the tree branches
and sits down): Well, it could have been worse.....it could have been
Shampoo or Nabiki I had to have lunch with. . . .(she wrings out her
clothing from the top branch) (thinking to herself) She could have
just asked though. . .I would have been happy to have lunch with her. . .
WHAT AM I THINKING?????? With *THAT* Kawaikune tomboy? She is really
cute though.. ...hmmmm.....(sighs) Life doesn't get easier over a
single lunch.

(Akane reappears with a kettle of water and pours it over Ranma-chan.
He changes back)

Ranma-kun: Lunch it is then.

(Akane smiles up at him).

(Akane and Ranma wander over to a private spot on the school grounds, in
the midst of the trees. They chow down and don't talk much. Akane
looks over at Ranma occasionally, a little worried because of his
silence. Ranma just stares off intot eh distance. Akane shakes her
head and smiles. She continues eating.)

Ranma (thinking) she's not that bad to be with...then again, we aren't
talking too much. . .(he steals a glance at her while she's not looking)
She's actually kinda cute.....

Akane (thinking): I wonder what he's thinking. . .He must hate
being with me because he's not talking. . .I better find out somehow. . .
(aloud) Uh Ranma. . ..

Ranma: Yes, Akane?

Akane: You never did answer my question earlier. . .do you want to break
off the engagement? When we're old enough?

Ranma: Uhhhhhh.....

(Just then a pair of tall caucasian teens come tearing through the
forested area. One a tall thin guy with Mousse like galsses, the other a
woman his same height .. .they nearly run over Ranma and Akane. . . who
just barely dive out of the way)

(They disappear into the bushes).

(In english just out of sight) <TAG! I got ya!>

(girl's voice) <No way, Tudor! Nyah! *pbbbbttttt* >

Tudor (male's voice): <HEY! HA! Gotcha that time, Jana! *pppppbbbbtttt*>

Jana (girl's voice): <HA! You can't out run me! I'm on the basketball
team!>

(Akane and Ranma look at each other perplexed and have settled back to
where they were. . .looking out into the bushes with rather odd
expressions.)

Tudor: <Nyah! Can't catch me! I'm the gingerbread man! *pbbbbttt*
besides, the swim team isn't made of people who can't run! Nyah!>

(We see them come thundering through out of nowhere and through Ranma
and Akane's picnic site again.)

Ranma (shotuing after the two): BAKA's!!!!!!! (looking over at Akane)
How rude of them! You'd think they'd be more polite if they're visiting.

Akane (shrugging): They're in love. . .what do you expect? (Ranma looks
uncomfortable). (Akane starts cleaning up) Thanks for having lunch
with me, Ranma. (bats her eyes at him) maybe we can do it again. . .I
enjoyed it, even if we were interrupted.

Ranma: sure. (smiling) Whenever ya like.

(Akane looks at him surprised, tehn grins devilishly and runs up to him).

Akane (looking up to him and grinning as cutely as she can): How about
this? (she puckers up and Ranma nearly freaks as she moves her face
towards his)

Ranma (shocked and freaking out): AKANE???? Uhh......(He blinks HARD
thinking this must be a dream and gets a peck on the cheek...He opens
his eyes and looks down at Akane, shocked).

Akane (smiling sweetly): By the way, TAG! (she pinches him hard and runs).

Ranma (jumping from the pinch and running after her with a sore butt)
Come back here! Kawaikune! Nyah!

(Akane runs back to the classrooms smiling).

Ranma (thinking as he runs after her): That wasn't so bad, was it?
nah. It wasn't.. . . (He lets her get to class just before he gets
there). Hmph. Beat me.

Akane (laughing): Dork. Must be getting slow, eh? (bats eyes at him
and he gets flustered as she zips to her desk)

Ukyou (walkign up behind him): HEY! What's up between you guys? You're
not taking a favorite. . .at least no her are you, Ranchan?

Ranma (startled): Oh! Ucchan! (turns to face her) No! Of
course not! (glances back at Akane who is talking to her friends). Why
would I want to have a kawaikune tomboy as my favorite, Ucchan?

Ukyou ( a little suspicious): Uh huh, whatever you say, Saotome. She
turns back to her desk and takes it).

Ranma (muttering to himself): Women. . . .

(We see the rest of the day pass as Ranma dozes more; gets harassed
by teachers throwing chalk; Akane looks dreaming pleasant daydreams;
Ukyou look worried; Nabiki extorts more money from various individuals
as the day passes; and finally, but not least, Kunou. . .who is outside
wondering where Saotome disappeared to. . .after all, he didn't finish
the fight!)

(Ranma, Nabiki, and Akane are all walking home, a little on the quiet
side.....everyone ahs something on their minds. . .)

Nabiki (how much money can I get for those photos? hmmmm...)

Akane: (thinking) That was fun today. . . .

Ranma: (thinking) Ugh. I hope I don't get attacked by shampoo or
anyone going home....it'd be nice for a change if that didn't happen.

(Akane grins again at the thought of the American couple running around
the forested area and she walks over to and beside Ranma. He looks down
and shakes his head. Nabiki, taking the hint from Akane, runs ahead).

Akane (looking around): Ranma....?

Ranma (still a bit lost in thought): Yeah, Akane?

Akane: About what I said earlier. . . .

Ranma: Waht about it?

Akane: Do you have an answer?

Ranma: Akane, I need a little bit of time yet, okay?

Akane (looking hopeful): Okay. I understand. We don't want to make
the same mistake our parents did by rushing this. (she slips an arm
around his while he's still thinking)

Ranma (lookign a little not there): Yeah. (he instinctly keeps his in
place)

(They walk arm in arm for quite a while while walking back...even though
Ranma doesn't notice. The fact he doesn't notice seems to please Akane
even more....it means he accepts it without thinking....already.....)

Akane: (remembering the American couple again) By the way, Ranma, (the
evil look returns). . .guess what?

Ranma (still lost in thought a bit): yeah? what?

Akane: (pinches him hard) TAG, YOU'RE IT! (She uns as fast as
she can towards the now insight dojo)

Ranma (so startled he pauses and doesn't give chace for a moment. . .
because he realizes that they walked as far as they did with arm in
arm.....) HEY! (He runs after her)

( We see the evening pass quickly. Ranma and Akane having a sparring
match. Dinner being served. Akane and Ranma et al all doing homework.
Fianlly, we see Ranma sneaking away into the night. . . Akane caught a
glimpse of him doing so and follows, though, at a distance).

(He bounces from one roof-top to another doing a general tour of town.
Finally, he make sthe circuit complete and ends up at the Tendo's
again. Akane can't figure out why he did it, but as long as nothing bad
came of it she's not oevrly worried....well, maybe. Finally, he stops
and lays down on the roof of the dojo and watches the stars. He seems
to be smiling and watching peacefully. Akanes decides to climb down and
then climb back up. After all, she doesn't want him to think she's been
spying on him!)

Ranma (smiling; thinking): I hope Akane enjoying bouncing around
tonight. hehe. I made the run a little longer tonight just for her.
(smirk) Spying on me. I just do it to blow off some steam
occassionally. I did get to do some thinking though, tonight....Akane...
hmmmm......

(Akane scrambles up on the roof)

Akane: Hiya. Whatcha doin up here?

Ranma (still looking up at the stars): Thinking. And you?

Akane: Just curious about you.

Ranma: Yah. Hey, Akane. About what you said earlier. (turning his head
towards her and sitting up) About us getting engaged for reals. . .

Akane: Yes, Ranma? (voice hopeful)

Ranma: I think I'd like to. It won't be easy for either of us. I've
got an uncute tomboy for a fiancee and you've got a hentai for a fiance.
So. . . . .I'd like to have a few more days to think about it, but I
thought I'd share what I was thinking with you. . . .

Akane (love in her eyes): Ranma. . .I don't know what to say. . . . .

Ranma (smiling): Come here. (he offers out his arms)

(Akane looks at him funny for a second and then goes over for the hug).

(Ranma enfolds her in a friendly hug and holds her for a minute)

Ranma (out of the blue): Akane?

Akane: Yes, Ranma?

Ranma: Guess what?

Akane: What? (looking curious)

Ranma (grins).....

Akane: What?

(Ranma pinches her and jumps away and off the roof)

Ranma: TAG YOU'RE IT!

Akane (mad): RANMA NO BAKA!!!!!!!!!

(We see time pass. Not just hours, but days. Ranma doesn't give Akane
an answer yet. She pesters hima bit but he explains he needs to think
longer. . .)

Akane (angry): How long is it going to take you, you stupid Hentai?

Ranma (starts to get angry): I told you I'm not ready yet, you kawaikune
tomboy. This is important! I have to make the right decision the first
time, right? So, please (Akane looks shocked at the word) bear with me
a little while longer. I'm sorry (Akane passes out, but Ranma doesn't
notice at first) that it's taking so long and I promise.....

(Ranma looks down at Akane and realizes she passed out. Not
understanding why he gets woried and calls for Dr Tofu.)

Ranma (on phone): Dr Tofu? (gets mad and shouts at the reciever) Pop!
You're a panda! You shouldn't be answering the bloody phone!

(growling noises come from the telephone reciever; a wind seems to blow
outward from it from the force of the noises. Ranma's ear looks blasted
and his hair swept from one side to another.)

Ranma (really mad; screaming into the reciever): You stupid, old man!...

Genma-panda (growl-screaming back): grrr. . .rowrl!

Ranma ( very mad and worry creeps into his voice): Look, Pop. I don't
have time to fight with you right now. Akane is unconcious for some
reason and I'm worried about her. . . .

Genma-panda (stops shouting/growling): erk?!

Ranma (continuing): I need you to send over Dr Tofu. It's an
emergency. We're at the dojo. Please?

Genma-panda:.....

Ranma (worry written in deeply in his vocie): Pop. Please, hurry.

Genma-panda (thinks): AT LAST! He's in love with her! (to the
reciever) Ro-kay. (hangs up and stumbles trying to run and skip at the
same time to where Dr Tofu is).

Dr Tofu (to the departing patient): be sure to tkae the medication.
Come back next week if everything seems to be going alright and if not
come when any new problems arrise. I'm sure they won't though. Bye!

(Genma-panda grabs his shirt and yabks a couple times)

Dr Tofu: Mr Saotome! What is it?

(Genma-panda frantically gestures and tries to explain using paw waving
and such, but fails miserably. Finally, he gets exasperated and runs
into Dr Tofu's small kitchen and dumps some hot tea water on himself.)

Genma: Akane is hurt. RANMA is worried. You better hurry over. She
passed out for some reason....nothing my son could tell. They're at the
dojo. He was too worried about moving her to bring her here.

Dr Tofu: Oh! Well, if RANMA is worried about Akane it must be
something to be worried over indeed. I'll rush right over. (working
on his medical kit to take over with him, but speaking to Genma). Mr
Saotome will you explain to my normal patients that this emergency has
arisen and that I'll attend to them when I get back. If I am not back in
time for them, could you reschedule those who wish to do so? Thanks!
(Dr Tofu rushes out the door).

Genma: Uh. Okay.

Genma (walks out to the waiting room; most of Dr Tofu's patients are
looking out the door after him): LISTEN UP! Dr Tofu got called
away on an important, emergency call. All who wish to reschedule have
to go through me!

(en mass the patients dogpile Genma)

Genma (remenscent of Ranma): That's not what I meant. ...

(blink to Dr Tofu rushing to the Tendo Dojo)

Dr Tofu (thinking): I hope she's okay. .. .

(In the Tendo's: Ranma has put a pillow under her head and paces very worriedly)

Ranma (muttering under his breath): Why did you have to go and do this
you kawaikune tomboy? (starts hand speaking like an Italian) What am I
supposed to do? Look after you all the time? (gets a biblical
'accent') Am I your keeper?

(looks down at her. She looks peaceful)

(thinking) She's cute when she's peaceful.....(cocks a head to one
side) (says aloud looking a little beyond her) I love you, Akane Tendo.
(pauses and turns around) Please be okay.

Akane (straggling sound)

Ranma (turning around quickly; sees Akane sitting there wide eyed at his
last comment.....) uuhhhhh. . .are you okay?

(Akane passes out again)

Ranma (frustrated and worried) ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHH!

(He hears chuckling behind him and swiftly turns taking up a fighting stance)

Ranma: None shall pass!

(The chuckling continues and Dr Tofu takes a step into view).

Dr Tofu (still smiling and chukcling a bit): Cute Ranma. Very Cute.
(He kneels beside Akane and begins a thorough examination, very worried
at first. We see the worry melt away and become replaced with
amusement) Well, she's okay. She was a little too overwhelmed. Was
there anything more that you said to her beyond what I heard, Ranma?
No. Probably not. Those comments alone would have shocked her to the
point of unconciousness. Well, we'll fix that (pokes Akane in a few
places and she jumps bolt upright)

Akane (lookign lost): Whaaaa.....?

Dr Tofu (to akane with hints dropped for Ranma): You're okay Akane.
Nothing to worry about. You just need to toughen yourself up to
ummm....Ranma's new treatment of you. Okay?

Akane (smiling happily at Dr Tofu): Okay, Dr Tofu! (then face faults
when she remembers the comments) (turns to Ranma) Ranma........

Ranma (looking uncomfortable): Uhhhh....yessss?

(Just then Nodoka and Kasumi walk in; Ranma spins around and looks
panicked. He realizes it's to late though for flight. Akane looks at
them both with saucer sized eyes. Kasumi looks at Ranma happily)

Kasumi (smiling stills): Surprise Ranma!

Ranma (stunned and terrified): Mom......

Nodoka (rushing over to Ranma) SON! (envelopes him in a hug).

(Akane stands up just in time to be knocked over by a psyching out Dr Tofu).

(Dr Tofu stands simulatniously smiling at Ranma and Nodoka. He sees
Kasumi and quite predictibly freaks out, knocking down Akane in the process)

Dr Tofu: Kaa--kaa-kasumi! (his glasses fog over) What an amazing
coincedence to meet you here of all places! (Dr Tofu with a stupid grin
on his face turns to Ranma) Now Ranma-chan. You must be more careful!
No more playiing in the cold water. . .we all KNOW what it does to your
manhood...(he winks as Nodoka suddenly turns to stone; he walks up to
the wall and addresses it while Kasumi giggles) Akane, you must be
stronger than you have been. I realize that Ranma can be thoughtless at
times, but as long as both of you keep loving one another things will
work out. . .(turns away towards Kasumi) Nice to meet you, Nodoka-san.
We've all heard so much about you here. (Nodoka looks thoroughly
confused for a second and then a light bulb goes off above her head)
(She smiles at Kasumi who looks back giggling).

Kasumi: You're so silly some times Dr Tofu.

(Akane has face faulted in the mean time at what Dr Tofu is blurting out)

(He walks over to the wall and tries to exit)

Dr Tofu: Good-bye everbody! I have other patients to take care
of. I'm sure that Akane and Ranma can heal their own engagement now.
Bye! (he falls out a window)

Kasumi: Oh my! (rushes over with the otehrs to the window).

(Dr Tofu landed alright though and is dancing in the fish pond. Cries of
'Yippeee' and the like constantly heard).

Nodoka (chuckles at first at him and eyes Kasumi amusingly): Well, it
seems someone is happy. (Rounding on Ranma and Akane) It seems we have
much to talk of, son and future-daughter-in-law. Come. (Nodoka flows
out of the room almost imperially as Akane and Ranma gulp and follow).

(They follow Nodoka down the hall and into Ranma and Genma's room)

Nodoka (looking very severe): Talk, Ranma. What's the 'Ranma-chan' from
Dr Tofu? And what's this about water and you manhood? Also I'd like to
know what's with this engagement to Akane.....

Ranma: uhhhhh......

Akane (interjecting): Our fathers engaged us forcibly and without our
concent. Mr Saotome apparently promised my father that his son, should
he have one, would marry one of my father's daughters, should he have
had any. Mr Saotome brought Ranma here and he and my father selected me
for being his fiance to satisify his honour! (She pants and hopes she
distracted Nodoka enough from the other questions. . .unfortunately,
Nodoka has a sharp mind).

Nodoka (thoughtful for a minute): I see. Well, that clears that up.
(Ranma still looks worried over that and what's to come) (murmuring to
herself) Family honour is family honour. . .but. . .(She looks up at
Ranma) Do you mind explaining what Tofu-sensei meant for the other
comments, Ranma? (she looks a little intense).

(Akane gulps. Ranma sweats).

(Just then Happosai makes an entrance darting into the room. He's
carrying a massive bag of panties, as usual, and a jug)

Happosai: Ranma-chan! Akane-chan! My darlings! (Nodoka swivels in
place looking like she could crack stone with that glare) (Happosai
ignores her and chucks a bottle of water at Ranma)

Ranma: AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(He attempts to dodge. Happosai latches on to Akane's chest.)

Happosai: Oh, Akane-chan! Will you comfort an old man in his time of
need!

Akane (screaming): HENTAI!!!!!!!!!!!! (smashes Happosai into the ground)

Nodoka (looking furious) : DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (she brandishes her
katana and in a blur of speed we see Happosai's bag and panties shredded).
NOW. YOU. PERVERT. WILL. LEAVE. US. ALONE! UNDERSTAND????? (She looms
like no other at that moment).

Happosai (gulping): I'll be back for revenge for my panties! (blows a
kiss in between Akane and Nodoka). I'll be back for you especially,
Ranma-chan (winks)

(Nodoka is about to swing her katana to slice him in half when an almost
petit foot lashes out inbetween her and Akane and punts Happosai through
the ceiling.)

Ranma-chan: DIE OLD PERVERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happosai (voice receding): I'LL GET YOU ALL FOR THAT!!!!!! You'll
see!!!!!!!!!!!.........(more shotuing is heard from him, but it's too
faint to be made out)

(Nodoka stares in wonder and shock at the red headed pig tailed girl
inbetween her and Akane. Akane sighs)

Akane (resigned): I'll go getteh hot water. You talk to your mom, Ranma.

(Nodoka is still staring at Ranma-chan; Ranma-chan turns and looks at
his mother)

Ranma-chan (sad): Now, you know.

Nodoka (confused and upset): Ranko? Where's my son?

Ranma-chan (irritated): It's me! (shouts) *I'M* *A* *GUY*!!!!!!

Nodoka (not willing to believe it; she's not stupid, just not quite willing
to accept what her eyes tell her): Ranko, enough games. Where's Ranma?

Ranma-chan: I'm *HIM*. Look, Pop took us to Jusenkyo. It's a training
grounds in China. Dad couldn't read a THING in Chinese, so he thought
when he heard that it was a dangerous training ground we'd best go so we
can have said that we've learned the most and from the best places. We
got there alright. . . . .

[flashback:

Ranma and Genma standing on the edge of the pulls.

Genma: I won't go easy on you Ranma!

Ranma: That's just the way I like it!

Guide: Wait! Sirs! I haven't finished my story yet!

(We see Rnama and Genma fly at each other and strike from pole to pole
in midair. Finally, Genma gets outsmarted and goes flying in to a pool
of water).

Ranma: Hey Pop. are we done yet? (pause) Pop?

(All of a sudden we see a Panda erupt from the pool and land on the
pole in the same position that Genma had been in a moment ago. The
Panda is wearing what's left of genma's clothing and his glasses).

Ranma (pointing at Panda; shouting): HEY! WHAT'S THAT?

Guide (whipping out sign): That's what I try tell you. That
spring of drowned panda. Terrible, terrible tale of panda that drown
there two thousand year ago.

Ranma (scared and furious): HEY! You didn't tell us anything
about this!

(Genma-panda takes Ranma's distraction for a moment to strike
and attacks him. Ranma flies through the air and lands in another pool.
We see him emerge much shorter and with different hair color).

Guide: Now you fall in spring of drown girl. Tragic story of young
girl who drown one thousand five hundred year ago.. . .

(Ranma squeezes his chest)

Guide: Whoever fall in Spring take body of young girl!

(Ranma rips open his shirt.)

Guide: Look. Now you young girl!

Ranma-chan (looking down at his breasts): AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

fade back to the present]

Ranma-chan: So that's how it happened. AHHHH!!!!!!!

(Akane had entered in while Ranma and Nodoka had been wrapped up in the
story. She is now pouring the contents of the kettle over Ranma's
head. Nodoka blinks and sees her son again).

Akane (smirkingly): He changes back with the use of hot water. Cold
water is what gets him into trouble. Hence Dr Tofu's comment. Not very
many people know about Ranma's curse.

Ranma (glaring up at Akane): It doesn't need to be THAT hot; thank you
very much. (to Nodoka) Ever wonder why Mr Panda had glasses like Dad's?
Well, when we heard that you were coming, we hid. We didn't want to
commit seppu-ku, thanks much. We did it because we didn't want to die....

(Nodoka sighs and swings around her katana. Akane, amazingly enough
also brought tea. She sets it down and gives a level, hard look to Nodoka).

Nodoka: It seems we have no choice in this matter then, Son. You, your
father, and I must commit seppu-ku!

Ranma: AHHHHH!!!!!!! ARE YOU NUTS????? (backs away quickly) I'm not
going to kill myself over some stupid promise.

Nodoka: Our honor requires it.

Akane (pounds fist into floor)(voice hard as stone): Ranma. Would you
excuse Mother and I for a moment. I'd like to speak to her alone.

(Nodoka turns and looks at Akane rather surprised. Ranma blinks and
isn't sure what to do....)

Akane: if you'd rather commit seppu-ku, remain by all means, Ranma, you
hentai.

(Nodoka blinks again at Akane.)

Ranma: Er. Right. See you guys in a bit.

Nodoka (stands): Wait one moment. . .

Akane (stands between Ranma and Nodoka; pulls out her mallet): Ranma.
Go. She and I have to have a talk (stone seemed soft by her voice)

(Ranma zips out of the room and closes the door. Nodoka prepares to
face off with Akane. Akane drops her mallet and sits. She reaches over
to the tea, confusing Nodoka).

Akane (friendly voice): Would you like some tea while we talk,
future-mother-in-law?

(Nodoka blinks and is unsure of what to think).

Akane (sipping tea): See? It's not poisoned. Sit. have some. We are
not men here for a challenge.

(Nodoka is flabbergasted at the younger gir....no. woman. A very
courageous woman.)

Nodoka Voice hard; katana pointed at Akane's face): I could strike you
down now.

Akane (vocie still light): I know. You won't though. You are too
honorable. Sit. Drink. *WE* HAVE to talk. Specifically about Ranma.

(Nodoka looks confused for a moment unable to decide between her honors. . .
she sits)

Nodoka (taking a tea cup): You are right. We are not men.

(scene switches to Ranma pacing down stairs)

Ranma (thinking): What are they up to? There's no loud noises from a
fight? There's no corpses flying out the window. (aloud) WHAT ARE THEY
DOING? (shakes his fist at the upper story and is about to go up when
Genma and Soun walk in)

Kasumi (gliding in): Would you like something to drink? (she has a tray
with some iced tea in a pitcher).

(Genma and Soun immediately sit down at the table. Ranma stops still
looking up at the upstairs).

Genma: She's such a dutiful daughter, Soun. Alas, if I only such in a son.

Soun: Well, you do havea son. Yes, She is a dutiful and wonderful
daughter. A joy like no other.

Genma (to Ranma): Come sit, boy, and drink. Kasumi was kind enough to
bring out something for us to drink and it would be dishonorable for you
not to accept it.

Ranma (staring upstairs): No.

Genma (angry): See here, Ranma. You will obey your father and come have
some tea. I have taught you better than this, Ranma. I expect you to
honor me and our family with your obedience to my wishes.

Ranma (distracted): No.

Genma (very angry): Ranma. . ..

Kasumi (pleasantly): Ranma, come and sit. Akane and your mother won't
be done any faster with you sitting there looking up at them through the
floor boards.

Genma (choking): Ranma, you heard Kasumi, come and. . . . .erk!
(looks pale) did you say that his mother was here?

Kasumi: Yes. She's up stairs with Akane right now. (sips her tea)

Genma (near panic): Ah! I have to jump in the pool! (makes ready to
jump in; Ranma grabs him).

Ranma: No use, Pop (still looking upstairs) She knows and she's pretty
good with that katana.....

Genma (nearly psychotic): NO! It can't BE! I must flee! I want to
LLLLLLIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Ranma: Me too. Mom tried to make me commit seppu-ku, but Akane stopped
her. There hasn't been any noise from up there since a single large
thud. (looks worried) Akane hasn't come out. Neither has mom.

Kasumi: I'm sure they'll be fine. Akane took some tea up with her
before you came down. I'm sure they're jsut talking and sorting things
out. (smiles) After all, they aren't men. . ..

(All the guys glare at her, but she doesn't notice.)

(We see time pass. Several hours have gone by. Ranma paces a rut into
the dining room floor. Kasumi is cheery and goes about her business.
Genma and Soun attempt a game of Shougi but genma is so distracted that
he doesn't cheat and is wins because of it. . . .)

Ranma (steps out of the rutt): That does it! I'm going up!

(Just then we see Akane and Nodoka walk out. Each is laughing and
smiling like old school girl friends. Ranma's eyes bulge. Genma gulps
and distractly place shis last stone which wins the game. Soun cries
for a moment and then realizes that everyone is looking up at his daughter
and Nodoka and stops. Kasumi is beaming.)

Nodoka (looking at Ranma): I am sorry. I will not seek for you to
commit seppu-ku. (looking at Genma) You! You and I need to be alone
for a while. There is much to be discussed, Genma.

Genma (looking like he's about to bolt): uhhhh....maybe later, dear. I
ahev to go visit the store for Kasumi. Right, Kasumi?

Kasumi: Well, it would be nice, but I think you have other priorities to
deal with right now, Mr Saotome.

Genma: Uhhhhh....eerrrr.....thanks, Kasumi. I feel some much better for
being released from that responsibility.

Nodoka (stlaks down the stairs drawing her katana): You, dear husband,
have much to explain. (before Genma can get up she has the katana next
to his neck; she smiles darkly and bends down. . . .and kisses him).
Eleven eyars has been a long time, Genma.....(drags him to his feet and
throws him over her shoulder and rushes up stairs.. . .)

(Kasumi, Akane, and Nabiki (who walked in in the middle of all this) are
cheering). (Ranma's eyes are bulging. . .after all, they are his parents.....)

Soun (laughing hysterically): What a great way to die, Saotome-kun!

(scene fades with one last remark)

Ranma (sarcastically): Great! Where am *I* going to sleep tonight?

(Akane first then the rest all laugh at him)

Ranma (a little annoyed and mad): HEY! It's NOT funny!

(scene fades out the rest of the way)

(END PART 1)

(PART 2: Ranma 1/2. . . .After All this Time. . .!?
by Will Baird
wba...@nmsu.edu

(scene: The dojo several days later. First thing in the morning. We
see Nodoka and Kasumi race each other to the kitchen; they are grinning
at each other. They seem to be competing, friendly wise, to see who can
finish making breakfast first)

Nodoka: So. when are you going to do something about Tofu? (looks
innocent) hmmm?

Kasumi: Nodoka-san! (blushing) I am just waiting for him to be ready.

(Akane stops just outside the door and eaves drops.)

Nodoka (grinning almost like a impish girl): Hmph. Men are never ready
for marriage. You have to beat them into it.

Kasumi (falsely shocked face; trying to suppress a grin): Well, maybe if
they're Mr. Saotome, but not Dr. Tofu! (grinning openly now)

Nodoka: Come, come. He's just another man! (snickers; trying not to)
If you don't chase him more actively, if even subtly, men NEVER see the
subtle ways, but always fall for them, by the way. . .

Kasumi (mock indignation): Hmph. I'm not that kind of girl.

(Akane grins and rolls her eyes. she walks away. It's fairly obvious
that Nodoka has wriggled into the girls' affections as a friend and
seems to be happy to give advice and act as someone no older than they
when she could.)

Akane (thinking): That advice sounds AWFULLY familiar. (giggles; she
walks outside and kicks Ranma's tent). WAKE UP!

Ranma (groggy, a little annoyed from inside the tent): HEY! What did
you do that for!

Akane (innocently): What? What did _I_ do?

Ranma (a little miffed): Why you, kawaikune tom-

(Akane is standing there looking WAY too cute to be called uncute...she
bats her eyes at Ranma who gulps).

Akane: Yes, Ranma-chan?

Ranma: Uhhhhh.... I'm a guy!

Akane (bats eyes like a pro): Really?

Ranma: yeah....(looking a little confused).

Akane (turns away): Okay, sweetie.

Ranma (worrying; thinking): Is she alright?

(Abruptly she swings around roundhouses him into the pond).

Akane (sweetly): Could have fooled me! (she starts walking in the
house)

Ranma-chan (MAD): GRRRRRR!!!! (comes tearing out of the pool and jump
kicks at her)

(Akane parries and they fall into the rhythm of their morning sparring
matches. It seems that Genma has gotten lazy in the morning for some
reason and Nodoka asked Akane if she would be willing to spar with Ranma
in the mornings now).

Ranma-chan: You can't beat me, Akane! I'm a guy!

Akane (grinning wolfishly): Better explain your chest then
Saotome-chan! (giggles)

Ranma (glaring): That's not funny! Take it back! (makes a feint and
attacks; Akane isn't fooled and counterattacks neither lands a solid
blow though).

Akane (laughing and fighting): Well, I'll stop teasing about being a
girl if you tell me your answer to my question I asked a whole two weeks
ago.

Ranma-chan (stops; gets whacked and falls over): uhhhhh....

Akane: RANMA! (darts over to him where he's sprawled) Are you okay?

(She grins up at her and asks for a hand which she gives her)

(Ranma-chan grins and bends to her ear making motions for her to lean in
so he can tell her)

Ranma (whispering): Well, I have decided that I want to. . . (pinches her
HARD; Akane yelps) TAG!!!!! (RUNS; Akane runs after him).

Akane (furious): RANMA NO BAKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Nabiki peeks out her window and up at the two as they dash off roof
hopping; Ranma-chan feeling Akane)

Nabiki (yawning and stretching): Like clock work. As good as and
cheaper than an alarm clock. Too bad I can't take them with me to
college. Save me some money and even make some if there are guys like
Konou there. (shakes her head; gets dressed and heads down stairs)

(She makes it to the breakfast table and sits down. Soun and Genma are
there. Soun is reading his paper as usual. Genma is wolfing down his
breakfast. Nodoka, in between glances at her husband, is eating lightly
and chatting with Kasumi over Dr. Tofu. They seem to be plotting
somehting for him. Nabiki just shakes her head. A doctor in the family
would be nice. . . it would save her on medical bills later in life. .
.now if Kasumi would just go get him. . . )

Nabiki (sitting down): Morning.

Kasumi (bright eyed and bushy tailed as usual): Good morning.

(cut to different scene: Happosai working on something. We see the
back of his wrinkled head and we pull back to see the rest of him. We
slowly take in the rest of the view. He's standing on a
boulder....chanting. The boulder is inscribed with similar markings
and, in Japanese, we can tell they prayers to seal something.)

(cut back to the Tendo dojo)

Nodoka (patting on her husband's arm): Well, at least you're eating
healthy. Wouldn't want you to get ill. Too much for you to do, yes?

Genma (looking dubious, eyes narrowed): Such as, dear?

Nodoka (smiling perhaps a bit too sweetly): Well, after you get back
from Dr. Tofu's I need a lil help with some things....

Genma (even more suspicious): What sort of things ......

Nodoka (smiling even more sweetly): Oh! My, well, things a husband is
SUPPOSED to help a wife with.....

Genma (thinking of her attitude the past few days): AH! I see! I'd be
happy to help. (wicked look starting to come to his eyes)

Nodoka (smiling sweetly...dangerously so): Good dear. I need some of
the heavy things in the house moved around.

Genma (face faults): .....

(cut to Happosai. He's now dancing on the boulder calling out
maniacally to the winds and gods! Uttering such powerful prayers!)

Happosai (yelling): PPPPPAAAAAAANNNNNNNTIIIIIIIESSSS!

(Well, okay. Sorta shouting powerful prayers....:P~)

(Tendo Dojo at breakfast)

Nabiki (to Ranma and Akane): Thank you for being quiet last night. It
was a nice change of pace...and I didn t have to pay for it.

Akane & Ranma: WHAT!

Nabiki (cool and collected): I heard you guys get up. I distinctly
heard Ranma get up from his room and go to yours, Akane. (Ranma makes a
strangling sound)

Ranma (shocked he was heard): I didn't go in!

Akane (shocked and staring at Ranma):.....

Ranma (defensive): I just wanted to check on her! (realizing what he
said)

Akane (happily surprised): Ranma?

Ranma (looking defensive): I...ummmm.....

Nabiki (looking smug): You DID leave with an awfully happy face Ranma. . .
and quite a while afterwards too I might add. (starts eating some rice)

Ranma (VERY defensive): HEY! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!

Akane (starting to worry): Ranma!? What did you do?

Ranma (tripped into the attack): NOTHING! I LOOKED IN ON YOU! IS IT A
CRIME TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT A FIANCEE? EVEN IF SHE IS A KAWAIKUNE TOMBOY??????

Akane (MAD): RANMA NO....

Nodoka (interjects by slamming her katana into the table, embedding it):
Now, now. No fighting at the table. (calmly eats again)

(Happosai! We see him crying out and hopping up and down. He canters
all over the boulder. Then he stops. He pulls out a candle. He lights
it and places it on the top of the boulder. It is not in a holder, but
it is inscribed with symbols)

(Tendo Dojo at breakfast)

Nabiki (still looking smug even though her plan soured a lil bit; she
had been hoping Ranma would get wet for more pictures): Akane... if I
were you I wouldn't be upset.

(everyone. Still startled by the katana looks at her shocked)

Everyone: HUH?

Nabiki (smugly, in between bites): Oh yes! I did forget to mention that
Akane got up and went to Ranma's room after he had been gone from her room.

Akane (looking worried; a lil panicked): NABIKI! SHHHH!

Kasumi (a lil offended): Akane. Ranma. You know that it's not right
before marriage to do that....

Nodoka (looking a little worried): Ranma? Have you soiled Akane's honor?

Nabiki (still smug): Well, if he's soiled it. She's wallowing in it.

Akane (shocked): WHAT?

(Nodoka is fingering the end of her katana)

Ranma (to Nodoka, nervously): No mother, I have not. I got up to check
on her at night. I had a bad dream and wanted to check on her. That's
all. I don't know what happened about her getting up after that. I was
asleep.

Akane (nodding quickly): He's not touched me. He may be a hentai (winks
at him), but he's not one that'd touch me I think....(Nyah!'s at Ranma)

Ranma (agreeing at first): Yeah! I'd not tooo....HEY! (nyah's back at
her) Besides, she's an kawaikune tomboy. Who'd do anything like that
with HER!

Akane (moving before Ranma or Nodoka can react): RANMA NO
BAKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Throughs him out into the pond; he (she) now
splashes in the water and bounces out. Nodoka flinches)

(The Nekohanten. Shampoo is zipping around the dining room of the
restaurant obviously in a hurry. She's going so quickly that she's
making a whirl wind around her. Cologne hops in.)

Cologne (seriously): Are you done yet, grand daughter?

Shampoo (the storm): Whee Whee Whee Whee! (spinning Tasmanian devil
sounds).

Cologne (grumbling): I hate it when she does this....people think she's
from Australia...(she whips out her staff while landing on a table and
trips Shampoo. Shampoo looks dazed and confused)

Shampoo: OH! Great Grandmother! Shampoo no see you. (gestures at
the dining room) See all done. Now great grandmother show Shampoo surprise?

Cologne (smiling and thoughtful): Yes, my child, come with me....we'll
win son-in-law's heart this very day!

(cackling she leads Shampoo away; Mousse barges out into the dining
room. His glasses are up on his head.)

Mousse: Shampoo! I love you!

(He looks confused. She hasn't slapped him, pounded him, or harmed him
at all.)

Mousse (whiling pulling down his glasses): Shampoo? (is looking at a wall)

(Happosai! He dances around more. Then he stops and knuckles his fist
against the boulder).

(Tendo Dojo...Nodoka and Kasumi are seen cleaning up after breakfast.
Kasumi calmly pulls the katana out of the table and just as calmly gives
it to Nodoka...without even looking at Nodoka.....Kasumi is
concentrating on something else. Nodoka takes it without noticing
either and slides it into place on her back).

Kasumi (continuing, but with a furrowed brow): Do you really think that
I should be more active in attracting Dr. Tofu's attention, Nodoka?

Nodoka (calmly and without hesitation...certainly without missing a beat
in cleaning things up): Yes. I do. You are old enough to be married.
(smiles at her briefly when she glances up) I wasn't married much older
than you are.

Kasumi (nodding, but still concerned): I don't want to scare him away
though. He's such a sweet man ....I might make him think I'm too
forward or too crass or not cultured....

Nodoka (laughing while cleaning around her son's place...she gets to her
husband's and grimaces): No. He won't. He's ready for you now...he'd
be ready to marry you now if he could get over his silliness....

Kasumi (smiling): That s part of why I like him...he can be so sweet,
yet so silly at times....

Nodoka (smiling too): Yes, he can be....but believe me...when you aren't
there he acts VERY differently.

Kasumi (thoughtfully): Really? I guess it must be so....Akane once said
something similar. I wonder why he acts so funny then.....

Nodoka (smiling a bit too knowingly and trying to not let it be seen): I
have no idea, dear...I have no idea....

(Happosai! He pulls back his fist.)

(the Nekkohattan. We see Shampoo holding a package. It's obviously
food of a sort. Cologne is lecturing her.)

Cologne (lecturing tone; very stern): Now, granddaughter. You must
hurry. If Ranma doesn't eat this batch within the next hour it will not
work. Then we will have to try again. I will be most displeased if
this should not work, girl.

Shampoo (excitedly): Shampoo no fail. feed Ranma and make him fall in
love with her. Hi-Yah! (spins in place)

Cologne: So long as you understand me, girl. Good. Go get your
husband!

Shampoo (leaving): Bye, great grandmother! Thank you for helping Shampoo!

Cologne (muttering after her): Now if I could just get her to stop
addressing herself so....

(Happosai! His arm is pulled back to the furthest it can be. He's
kneeling on the boulder now. He has something in his fist. His fist is
positioned exactly above the candle)

(Tendo Dojo; We see Ranma, Akane, and Nabiki rush about and out the
door for school. Kasumi is leaving at the same time heading towards Dr.
Tofu's).

Nodoka (thinking while she s waving): I Hope she has good luck! (she
turns and goes inside, feeling a little bit apprehensive) Now let's hope
I was right about Dr. Tofu....(aloud and quite) GENMA!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET
YOUR FUZZY BUTT IN HERE! WE HAVE THINGS TO CLEAN AND MOVE!

(Happosai. He lowers his fist down to the candle flame. It's begun to
rain. Violently. The wind howls it's anguish at the fates anger. A
wick is sticking out of his fist and the object in it. It lights)

(cut to Akane, Ranma, and Nabiki walking to school. Nabiki and Akane
have been talking and Ranma has been distracted...thinking about
something else. Akane and Nabiki have stopped though. Akane looks up at
Ranma and leans close to Nabiki)

Akane (to Nabiki, quietly): Could I get you to run up ahead. Please?

Nabiki (just as quietly): It'll cost you.

Akane (grimacing): Clean your room once?

Nabiki (thinks and replies): No. Help me get a date with Ryouga.

Akane (almost face faulting): RYOUGA? (voice rising slightly)

Nabiki (hissing): SH! Keep it down!

Akane (smiling and almost giggling): Alright. I'll see what I can do. . .
I mean it won't kill anyone to do it...Ryouga?!

Nabiki (winking and linking the front of her top incisors): He's got a
bod....(she winks at Akane whose shocked and runs ahead) (to Ranma) I'll
see you two love birds laters...I gotta let you guys talk after your
escapades last night...ta-ta!

Akane (glaring after her):.....

Ranma (looking a little confused): Huh? Whatever, Nabiki (he starts to
get lost in thought again)

(cut to Shampoo on her bike. She's riding along the fence. She's
hoping that she'll run over Ranma and get him to eat while he's
recovering from the Ultimate Bicycle Technique)

(cut to Ukyou. She's running ahead of Ranma et al with a delivery to
the school. It seems that the principal, Kunou's father, wanted some
okinomiyaki for breakfast. she came armed because Ranma said he has a
habit of cutting off of all of your hair if he can. She's NOT about to
give up her hair.)

(cut to Shampoo. She's daydreaming of Ranma)

(cut to Ukyou. She's daydreaming of Ranma)

(cut to Shampoo...in Shampoo's dream.

Ranma: Oh, Shampoo! I've been so wrong. Let's get married right now.

Shampoo: HI-YAH!)

(cut to Ukyou and her fantasy:

Ranma: Ucchan. I love you. Let's get married right now.)

(cut to Shampoo & her fantasy:

Shampoo: Ranma really mean to marry Shampoo instead of violent
Akane or Not-Nice Ukyou or crazy Kodachi?)

(cut to Ukyou and her mental antics:

Ukyou: Oh Ranchan! Where? When?)

(cut to Shampoo's fantasy:

Ranma: Yeah Shampoo, I mean, I love you, so I have to marry the one I
love right?)

(cut to Ukyou and her delusion of the moment:

Ranma: Now. Let's elope. We'll tell the others after the fact.)

(cut to Shampoo

Shampoo: HI-YAH! OH RANMA!)

(cut to Ukyou

Ukyou: YES! OH RANCHAN!)

*BOOM*

(We see Ukyou and Shampoo run head on into each other. Daydreaming)

(cut to Happosai. We see him raise his fist back again. Cocking it
into position.)

(cut back to Ranma and Akane)

Akane (looking up at Ranma, hope enters her eyes): Ranma.....

Ranma (shaking his head again): Huh? I must be out of it? What did you
say, Akane? I'm sorry I missed it......

Akane (smiling): Nothing. Just wanted your attention. By the way,
think that you could hop down and talk to me down here for a second?

Ranma (perplexed): Uh....sure. (he hops down and is beside her without
breaking stride)

Akane (serious look on her face): Reaching any conclusions yet? (hopeful)

Ranma (scowling): No. Not yet. Not anything ready to be said, one way
or another.

Akane (looking a little upset): Alright. Then. Could you hurry a
little. I would like to know, ya know.

Ranma (tired sounding): I'm trying. I want to make sure, okay?

Akane (thoughtful): Okay.

(they walk on in a little bit of silence for a bit)

Akane (apprehensive sounding): Ranma.....

Ranma (glancing at her): Yes?

Akane (calmly): Just this...(she leans over and pecks him and pinches
him) TAG! (runs)

Ranma (shocked): HEY! Akane! COME BACK HERE!

(Happosai! His fist races downwards smashing the candle flat and making
contact with the boulder as the bomb goes off. The Boulder shatters and
Happosai flies up and away from the explosion)

(Ukyou and Shampoo...they're laying on the ground looking confused.
They recognize each other and look very worried. Shampoo doesn't want
her surprise for Ranma ruined. Her great grandmother would not be
happy. Ukyou doesn't want a paying customer to have their meal
destroyed either. Despite intense dislike for the chinese-bimbo, Ukyou
decides not to fight and grabs her box and runs).

Ukyou (Calling over her shoulder): Sorry about that! Gotta run, Shampoo!

Shampoo (muttering to herself): Stupid klutz. Why she walk in bike pathway.

(cut to Akane and Ranma. They're chasing one another and acting, for a
change, like a happily engaged couple. Silly, young, reckless, in
love. They promptly realize this and stop.)

(Happosai! He's lying on his back and in rubble. In pain and not
feeling well. He struggles up. The boulder is gone. Something moves
out of the place where the boulder was and towards him.

Voice (deep, menacing): Who dares free me?)

(Shampoo. She collects her stuff and mounts her bicycle. She's about
to start pedaling when Akane and Ranma come around the corner. She's
oblivious to it, but Ranma tries to sneak back around the corner.
Akane, confused at first, catches on when she sees Shampoo). It's too
late however and Shampoo runs up to Ranma... and gloms onto him)

Shampoo: HI_YAH! RANMA! You here to take Shampoo on date?

Ranma: Uh, shampoo? I have to go to class right now....I attend school
here still, remember?

(Akane is fuming at Ranma and Shampoo)

Shampoo (batting her eyes profusely): Oh. Well. Okay. Ranma still hungry?

Ranma (caught off guard): Well, I am a little bit hungry....

Akane (fuming): YOU BIG OAF! YOU JUST ATE!

Ranma (starting the cycle): HEY! I didn't want to make a pig of myself....

Akane (reddening QUITE noticeably): NOT WANTING TO EAT LIKE A
PIG??????? When has *THAT* stopped you?

Ranma (angry): why you, kaw-

Shampoo: STOP!

(They blink and look at her)

Shampoo (flustered at having been marginalized so quickly): Ranma. Just
eat what Shampoo bring you for food then you go to school if you want.
Shampoo need get back to restaurant soon. Ranma and Akane fight later, yes?

Ranma (looking one last time at Akane): Sure. (takes the box from
Shampoo; he proceeds to wolf it down)

Shampoo (laughing): Go away, Akane. Ranma no want you any more. He no
want violent woman.

Akane (not quite as surprised as she was the first time she was told
something like that, but still a lil bit surprised): Huh? What do you mean?

Shampoo (laughing with mirth): HAH! Ranma eat love potion that make him
only love Shampoo. No other fiancee. AHAHAHAHA! Special ramen make him
Shampoo love slave! AHAHAHAHAH!

Ranma (looking a little bit confused...he looks down. He's eating
okinomiyaki, not ramen. He shrugs. What she doesn't know, won't kill her).

Akane (on the other hand did fall for it and whips out her mallet):
SHAMPOO!!!! DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shampoo (whips out her bonbari): Shampoo see Akane's schwartz is....oh.
nevermind. another role Shampoo had. (to Ranma) Ranma love Shampoo, not
Akane, right?

(Happosai!

Voice with body: Who dares interrupt my slumber for an excursion into
the world of man....

Happosai It is I! Happosai! Of the anything Goes School of Martial
Arts. I COMMAND YOU TO DESTROY RANMA SAOTOME!!!!!!!

Voice: Yes master! I will.)

(cut to Ranma, Akane, Shampoo)

Ranma (realizing that Shampoo is gonna cream Akane unless desperate
measures are taken decides to tell her anyways about the
okinomiyaki.....) I didn't realize that okinomiyaki counted as Ramen,
Shampoo...

(Shampoo looks shocked and grabs the box and bounces up onto the fence.
Akane takes advantage of the situation and swings her mallet at Shampoo
and misses, hitting the fence...while Shampoo is looking dismayed into
the box. She is so shocked that she falls off and rolls down into the
stream below. transforming into a cat....normally, that would have been
enough for Akane for her revenge....but it wasn't. Not even close.)

Akane (voice starts low as a loud growl and works upwards in volume): I.
HAVE. HAD. ENOUGH. OF. THIS......(SCREAMING) DIE SHAMPOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Akane vaults the fence and darts down the steeply sloped ditch towards
the sneezing Shampoo-cat).

(Shampoo-cat looks up and her eyes bugle. She turns to run and barely
makes it out from under Akane's mallet swing. They take off in a dead
run, Shampoo-cat fleeing a VERY pissed off Akane.)

Ranma (just recovering from the shock of Shampoo getting trounced by
Akane like that shouts first): AKANE! WAIT! STOP! (normal voice level)
great! Water! (pauses) (sighs) No helping I guess. (He jumps down
after them, but finds a dryish path that he can follow in pursuit)

(We see Akane chasing Shampoo all over Nerima and into Tokyo proper and
back. Shampoo-cat always just a little bit ahead of Akane. Ranma
always in pursuit too. Just a little bit behind. Akane corners
Shampoo-cat with no way out. She is about to swing and clobber the cat
finally when Ranma's hand snags the mallet. Shampoo-cat makes the
mistake of leaping onto her protector and fuzzing him in gratitude...We
see Ranma freak out and drop the mallet. He throws the cat away from
himself and runs. Akane gets the mallet and nearly clobbers Shampoo-cat
again. Ranma recovers his wits and goes running after them again. The
chase goes into Tokyo proper. In the more congested areas....)

Ranma (growling to himself as he runs): Shampoo no baka! That stupid
kawaikune tomboy! What if I'd gotten wet out here with all these
people? What would they do? Can't those girls do anything but fight?

Akane (thinking and panting to herself): Got....to.....catch....her.

Shampoo-cat (thinking): Meow! Shampoo no like violent tomboy. Exercise
is one thing. Chasing with death in mind another. Shampoo give her
Kiss of Death....when she in girl-form.

(Shampoo-cat has run out of ditch and hops up out of it and to the
road. Akane is behind her in hot pursuit. Ranma is slightly behind in
following.)

Shampoo-cat (thinking): Shampoo got to lose violent tomboy if Shampoo
want change back to human sometime soon. what best way?

Akane (closing on Shampoo-cat): Almost there! I'm going to get her!
I'm going to get her! I'll make her PAY too for glomping onto Ranma!
It won't happen again after this lesson!

Ranma (snarling): Stupid women! Why are they like this?

(We see something that doesn't fit into the surrounding area. It's
transparent and to most of the residents and people in the street. It
floats and flies along scanning. It sees our heroes and flies up to watch).

Voice (full of malevolence): Ranma......

(We see the crowd still running and shift to their views)

Shampoo-cat (thinking): HI-YAH! Shampoo have idea!

Akane (thinking still): Where IS she running? (gives chase)

Ranma (growling and snarling): ...

(Our invisible watcher flits from vantage point to vantage point
watching our heroes in their quest for love, and humiliating
satisfaction. Suddenly Shampoo-cat reverses direction and dives into
the traffic)

Shampoo-cat (thinking): HA! Akane no follow Shampoo here!

Akane (growling): You can't lose me that easily! (She jumps from moving
car top to car top with Ranma on her heels)

Ranma (shouting): STOP! ARE YOU GUYS STUPID OR WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!

(Our invisible friend chants slightly and we see Shampoo-cat fall on the
ground. Unmoving).

Akane (startled): SHAMPOO????

(Akane jumps down into the median and scoops up Shampoo. Ranma jumps
down with her)

Ranma (concerned): Is she okay?

Akane (also concerned): I don't know.

(Akane leans over and starts looking over the cat. Ranma can't get too
close to Shampoo...for some reason he seems to have some apprehension
over cats.....)

Ranma (sounding concerned about their health too): Akane. I think we
better. . .

(We hear a blaring of horns and a car careening wildly all over the road.)

Ranma (urgently) Let's go.....

(The invisible "friend" smiles grimly.)

Voice (unheard by any than itself): I think not, Ranma Saotome.
(gestures wickedly clawed hands) Meet your fait! (final emphatic gesture)

Ranma (confused): My legs....

(the car is swerving towards them)

Akane (frightened): Mine too! RANMA!

(the car swings away for a moment)

Ranma (still worried): Akane. Grab my arm!

Akane (confused but frightened): Why...

(the car wildly turns towards them)

Ranma (very angry): JUST DO IT! (reaches towards her)

Akane (reaching towards him; grasps his hand): Now what?

Ranma (annoying, but keeping it under control): When I tell you, jump
towards the side of the road...understand?

(car is speeding up)

Akane (nodding): Yes, but....

Ranma (angry sounding): JUST DO IT!

Akane (shocked): ....

Ranma (grabbing her hand with both of his): On the count of three...hang
to Shampoo...

(car is closing quickly)

Together: One.

(We see inside the car and the driver is hurt...badly. Looks like he's
been harmed or shot...)

Together: Two.

(We see the car closing to where they are very quickly. It's seconds
from impact)

Together: THREE! (Akane jumps as hard as she can and Ranma throws her
with all of his might. Her shoes are shredded as she rips from the
pavement. She flies through the air and reaches the far side easily.
The car is nearly upon Ranma. He twists and sends a chi-blast into the
front of it. The car is knocked away and to right.)

(The voice is cursing in a language unknown)

(time slows down a la anime physics)

Ranma (smiling and waving to Akane): (shouts) I'm Alright.

(he bends down to untie his shoes. He steps out of them. Oblivious to
the traffic trying to dodge the car he just blew into.....)

Akane (head whips around from Ranma and looks. The car is in the
traffic....in the oncoming traffic...): RAAAAAAAAANMMMMMAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ranma (turns to see what Akane is shouting about): ....

(He tries to lunge out of the way of the semi that just barely dodged
the car that had been in its way.....)

Akane (SCREAMING): RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAANNNNNMMMMAAAAAAA!!!!!!

Voice (laughing): Fate. Met. Saotome.

PART 3: Ranma 1/2. . . .After All this Time. . .!?
by Will Baird
wba...@nmsu.edu

Disclaimer: All Characters are trade marked by RUniko Takashi. (I'd
not want to steal from the Muse). I am merely borrowing them.

************Part 3:*********************************************************

(We see Happosai standing on the side of a mountain, trying very hard to
look impressive and stand in a heroic pose as the sun sets...well, as
much of one as a hentai of his caliber can attain...)

Happosai (face in the camera): WHO ARE YOU CALLING HENTAI????????
(returns to his original pose)

(The demon arrives, lashes it's tail, kneels, and bows...it's forehead
mockingly touching the ground.)

Happosai (not noticing due to facing the opposite direction): Has the
task been done?

Demon (head still touching the ground): Yes, master. It has been done.
Saotome has met his fate......

Happosai (nodding to himself, still staring out over the mountainside):
Good. That will teach my heirs to my school whether or not to
challenge their master. (turning and sees the demon with it's head
touching the ground; an angry, but mocking tone enters his voice) I
have one last task for you, demon.....

Demon (rising): And who says that the 'demon' will perform one last
task, hentai.....

Happosai (pissed as ...well, you get the idea): I AM NOT A HENTAI! YOU
WILL OBEY ME, DEMON!

Demon (laughing a malicious, terrible laugh): You didn't read about the
curse of the wishing demon did you, old hentai......prepare to meet the
fate that all who use me meet....whatever is wished for on their
enemies, happens to them......Prepare to die, hentai.

Happosai (furious beyond all belief): I AM NOT A HENTAI!!!!!!!!!

(Dr. Tofu's place. Dr. Tofu is working away with a patient. An elderly
individual that seems to have back problems. He is using his techniques
to solve the problem when he hears a knock at the door.)

Dr. Tofu (continuing yet speaking): I'll be out in a minute.....I am
with a patient. If you are in need of care, please, speak with Mr.
Saotome first and he can arrange for it. (finishes with the point healing
techniques and let's the patient up.) See. All done. None the worse
for wear. Please come back at the time arranged. Even though I am sure
that it will be healed shortly, but I would like to check up on you as a
precautionary measure.

Older man (feeling much better, sounding quite grateful): Arigato,
Dr. Tofu. I'll be sure to come back. After all, it IS my back that needs
the work....not someone else's.....

(They exit through the door and find there isn't a single other person in
sight. Thinking that it is odd, Dr. Tofu looks around).

Dr. Tofu (concerned): Mr. Saotome? Mrs. Nakai? Anybody here? (taking
a martial arts stance) Mr. Hituru, you better go.

Mr. Hituru (worried): Hai! (runs out the front door)

(Tofu stalks around the clinic looking for people....creatures (he'd learn
to expect the odd things since the Saotome's had come to Nerima. He'd
also had an increase in the amount of business from young individuals
too....primarily Akane and Ranma....especially Ranma. Dr. Tofu finds
nothing wrong and when he returns to the waiting room he finds......)

Dr. Tofu (glasses fog): KASUMI! What an amazing coincidence to run into
you here of all places!

Kasumi (giggling): Oh, Dr. Tofu!

(jump to Ukyou. She's whipping out okinomiyaki faster than a
speeding....ummm...spatula! no wait, that doesn't quite work since
that's what she's using.....oh well, we'll have to settle with the time
old cliche......a departmental secretary!)

Ukyou (thinking): That customer acted awfully weird...Ranchan did warn
me though. He DID attempt to go after my hair (smiles and runs a hand
through her hair...pointing out that he DID NOT get it....) as Ranchan
said. He wasn't happy when the food that I gave him wasn't okinomiyaki
thought, either....bumping into Shampoo ought to teach me not to
daydream like that. Funny though that the whole school got an
invitation to Kunou's dad's recently announced wedding....amusing to say
the least....poor woman will be bald all the time....Strange how she
changes sizes...(aloud) Okinomiyaki coming up! (an okinomiyaki flies
across the room to a plate for a student)

(something moves in the background; we can't tell what)

(Ukyou looks up at the time and she sees that it's close to closing. She
smiles. She had a special dinner planned for a particular male this
night. She wonders about him and hopes he is well. Nothing quite
mattered to her so much as Ranchan...well, save, maybe cooking.....)

(It moved again. We still can't tell what it was)

(She continues her cooking and finishes it up. Time has passed. It's
now past closing time and all the patrons have left. That something
though...it's still there...)

Ukyou (to herself): Ahhhh....Ranchan (saying it almost blissfully). I
cannot wait until we are married.

(that something flinches)

Ukyou (cooking again, but not for just anyone....for herself and Ranma):
I'll be able to cook for you my Ranchan like no other woman. Not that
Chinese-bimbo. Not that kawaikune tomboy....who'd want to cook like her
anyways? Unless they were going to be a professional spy and assassin
that is.....

(that something has moved closer to Ukyou. it's starting to resolve
into shape now....but we can't tell exactly what it is. It IS inside the
restaurant though.)

(Ukyou finishes the dinner and wraps it up. She is preparing to leave
when the something jumps out and surprises her. It's a table.....She
drops the dinner in surprise and almost catches it before it hits the
ground. It does hit the ground and be ruined though.)

(voice from inside the table): Ukyou!!!! Will you date with me!

Ukyou (voice furious): Tsubasa! DIE!!!! (she flips the table on its
back and throws it out the back door into the alley) EAT THIS! (she
throws the ruined food after him too) Oh Ranchan....your dinner!

(the phone rings)

Ukyou (grabbing it and answering): Ucchan's! Ukyou Kounji speaking.
(voice incredulous) Akane? (voice horrified) RANCHAN! NO!

(cut to Happosai; he's fighting the demon. It's an unforgiving battle.
Happy is severely hurt and is bleeding badly. The demon is harmed but
not fatally so. No quarter is given. None asked.)

Happosai (not tired according to his voice, but harmed badly still): I'll
not be losing to the likes of you, Wishing Demon! I swear it by the
blood of my ancestors!

Demon (smiling mockingly): May your blood mingle with your ancestors'
soon, Happosai......(sneering) Master......

(the whole mountainside is laid waste. fortunately, there are none
there to be harmed. Only the two. The natural, supernatural, and the
unnaturally perverted.)

(cut to Dr. Tofu's. Kasumi is kneeling in a very traditional kimono with
a meal set out before her. To Dr. Tofu it looks suspiciously familiar
he recognizes the Mukozuke, and a few other dishes before he fogs too
much to think straight )

Dr. Tofu (fights the fog down): Kasumi? What's this? I don't think I
under...(loses his control and fogs over) MY! That looks delicious!
(reaches out and takes Betty's arm and starts chewing) a little tough,
dontcha think?

Kasumi (giggling): You're so silly.....(stands up and walks over to
him) Sit down. (Dr. Tofu nearly leaps through the ceiling at her
touch. She holds him down though and escorts him to the mat. She sits him
down and sits opposite him.) Now. Shall we begin? (she bows)

(cut to Ukyou running through Tokyo to a destination. She's running
quite hard and looks like she's terrified. Something is obviously wrong
and she seems like she feels as though if she could get to it she could
fix the problem.)

Ukyou (screaming and smashing cars, bikes, whatever, or whoever get in
her way with her giant spatula): RAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNCCCCCCCHHHHHHANNN!!!

(she keeps running faster and faster, harder and harder. Where she's
running to we're not sure.....until we see a hospital.....)

(cut to Happosai. He's hurt. badly. The demon is in much worse shape
though. It's oozing out its horrid hide. He's bleeding from gashes in
his chest, arms, and throat.)

Happosai (weary sounding and obviously in pain): I have avoided this
to date. I will avoid it no longer. It is what I learned as a lad....(he
drops to his puny, withered knees)

(the demon grins and moves closer preparing for a kill)

Demon (viciously): Time to die old man.....old hentai....Your fate
calls....(mockingly) yes, prepare as you had as a lad, old fart....(gnashes
it's viciously shaped razor fangs together)

Happosai (gives an honest Buddhist prayer(?!?!!?!?!) and stands): Come
demon. Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain.
I await my fate (looking calm and placid)

(Is this our Happosai!?)

Demon (circles closer and lunges): DDDDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(claws grotesquely shaped spring out from the hands of the beast as it lunges
forward. Just before the monster is upon Happosai, he moves....with
speed never seen by our heroes before...well, save Ranma's punches...)

Happosai (sneering): You think I'm some devoute fool? Come and get
me fiend! Twere I devoute, I would not have freed you.....

Demon (snarling and recovering from being pushed over so easily): Old
fool....(lunging again)

Happosai (whipping something vast, satiny, and red out from under his
shirt): ULTIMATE TECHNIQUE! (a massive kai blast comes from Happosai's
hands and lashes out to take the demon in the chest and face......we
notice that the red, satiny and huge thing is a bra. One of a kind, the
largest ever made for a living woman....it took Happosai a full ten year
quest before he was able to achieve the conquest of swiping it....but it
was obviously well worth it...)

(The demon stopped and dropped to its knees its forward momentum
canceled out. It stands barely, but Happosai drops to the ground,
obviously spent...)

Happosai (exhausted and obviously knowing he's going to die): You should not be
living.....

Demon (harmed badly...charred and blackened): Who said I was living?
(smiles wickedly) No. It is not enough that I kill you as I
am......(morphs into a woman scantily clad in lingerie) (sweet voiced)
Now.....DIE HAPPOSAI!!!!!!!!! (a talonned hand lashes out)

(Happosai sees two wicked fingers race for his eyes and things grow dark
and cold).

(cut to Kasumi and Dr. Tofu. We see that they have completed their
meal. A very important and special meal. Kasumi has cleared away the
dishes and has place before her the items for the tea ceremony. Going
through the meal with Dr. Tofu wasn't easy, due to his fogging out/going
crazy...but now. Things are serious. He's no longer fogging up. His
face is hard and very serious....)

Dr. Tofu (looking at Kasumi who is blushing): Is this what you want?
(nods to the ceremonial tea items)

Kasumi (blushing harder, but persisting): Hai! (giggles a little)

Dr. Tofu (still not letting up): Why didn't you say something sooner?

Kasumi (serious now too): Dr. Tofu. . .I thought that I could wait
for you to come to realize that we shared something. Then I realized
after a talk with Nodoka-san (Dr. Tofu looks a little confused and
worried), Ranma's mother...she's quite nice once she had how her honor
resided explained to her by Akane....that life is short. That life
needs to be cherished and cared for....that the things that are
important need to be actively pursued....not just hoped for and
patiently waited for....(blushing hard)

Dr. Tofu (nodding): Hai! Alright, Kasumi, shall we?

(Kasumi reaches for her utensils...the love between Dr. Tofu and Kasumi
is quite apparent as they look participate in their engagement...)

(cut to Ukyou as she rushes in the emergency room doors. People are
careening about in seemingly mad and chaotic patterns. Those who have
been knifed or have attempted suicide are bleeding and screaming as they
are wheeled to and fro trying to get to the ER technicians....Ukyou
looks lost and unable to find anybody or anything until she hears
Akane's familiar voice)

Akane (screaming): YOU'RE GOING TO TREAT HIM AND TREAT HIM NOW! IF I HAVE
TO TEAR EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU APART TO ENSURE HE LIVES I WILL!

(Ukyou darts over to scene and joins Akane. Akane is wielding her
mallet and is glowing with a raging battle aura unlike any Ukyou has
seen...even from Ranchan!)

Ukyou (voice cold): You will treat him, and now....or there will be
many others to treat VERY shortly...(menace in her eyes as she unlimbers
the massive spat on her back)

(The doctor looks terrified and nods. Another doctor has called
security though and as Ranma is moved into the operating room by an
anxious nurse. The security forces arrive...)

Guard (cold voice): Put down your weapons....both of you
ladies.....now. We don't want a fight. Not here. Not with you.

Akane (furious with rage): NO! I *WILL* NOT! YOU BASTARDS MADE US WAIT
- - -MADE MY RANMA WAIT!- - - WHILE HE'S DYING! (Ukyou blinks at that,
but let's it ride.....the time isn't now for fighting over Ranchan...he
needed them to make sure these bastards cared for him...)

Guard (a little unsure now, but voice still cold): Miss. Just drop
the ...uhh...mallet. and you, lady, the...uhh... spatula....

Akane and Ukyou (together and harder than stone): NO!

Ukyou (hard): We don't want a fight here....

Akane: ...but we'll make sure our Ranma (they both blink as do the guards) ...

Ukyou and Akane: ...is properly treated. (they look at each other
for a moment and size each other up and nod....they could compromise...
this once.....over this....they loved Ranma......they could share him
for the moment...)

Guard (definitely unsure of himself): Uhhhh.....

Another guard (trying to make a point): Uhhhh....sir...ummm....it might
be a bad thing to try to take 'em here. . .with the patients and
all....not to mention they might just...uhh...win? And beat our asses?

(the motion of the ER swirls around them.....the cries of pain, the
swirl of rushing people.....the sheer numbers of people....it impresses us as
the guard, the head guard, stops to think in a dramatic way.)

Guard (nodding): Right. So long as you put up your weapons and keep out
of the way, we'll leave you two without taking you into custody......we
will leave a guard with you though to make sure that you stay out of trouble....

(Ukyou looks to Akane. Akane nods.)

Ukyou (nodding too): That is acceptable.

(The guards melt back save one. He takes up station watching them from
a distance after the head guard has talked to him. He doesn't speak or
listen to the girls...just watches...)

Ukyou (turning to Akane): Now. What happened? Have you called your
parents? Wha...?

Akane (watching the guard and the door through which they took Ranma
with a steady intentsity): I chased after that chinese-bimbo...I was SO
*SICK* of her glomping on to Ranma I couldn't take it anymore. She got
wet and became the cat. She lead me out into the street where Ranma,
who followed us the whole time, and I got stuck the pavement. She
wasn't conscience at all....(smirks) We encountered Asuza while waiting
for the ambulance....I gave the unconscious cat to her....she's now
Jeane Lynnette....Ranma saved Shampoo and I from a car, but was stuck
himself and was hit by a semi.....not full on, but hit badly.....He was
unconcious when I dragged him out of traffic.....I know it was stupid to move
him...but...I...I....I...couldn't leave him out there to be run over or
worse.....

Ukyou (nodding): You did fine....now, did you call home and tell them
where you are and what happened?

Akane (starting to freak out...she's fighting back shock): No....No....I
haven't. (eyes unfocussed) I just thought to call you first...you're a
friend if a pain in the ass over Ranma with this engagement stuff....I'd
better call....(SMACK) (Akane looks stunned...Ukyou just slapped her!)
WHY YOU BIT-

(Guard starts to get worried....what if they go at each other??????)

Ukyou (defensively): HEY! STOP IT! You were going into shock. We can
put aside our differences for Ranchan, can't we? For once? We have to
think of him ...HE'S in THERE now....he needs us and not us
fighting.....he needs us coherent and not jabbing at each other and
bickering...alright?

(Akane her eyes smoldering nods reluctantly...)

Ukyou (looking apologetic): Its alright. I'm sorry, but we can't have
his two 'legimate' fiancees fighting and trying to kill each other....or
even loose it...alright? (not waiting for Akane to answer)
Good.....now. Go call. . .I'll watch over Ranchan....

(cut to Dr Tofu's clinic.....as Kasumi and Dr Tofu have completed the
ceremony and bend over...in a nontraditional manner and kiss...for the
first time....)

Kasumi (coming out of the kiss...): Oh my!

(cut to the Tendo Dojo.....everyone has just finished eating...Nodoka is
looking concerned....presumably about Ranma and Akane, et al, who seem
to be missing. They had left for school that morning but hadn't been
heard from since...for that matter where was Kasumi? It isn't like her
to be late....)

Nodoka (a little bit of concern penetrating her voice): Soun...have
you seen Ranma, Akane, or Kasumi today since they left this morning? Or
you Genma?

Genma (shaking his head a little worriedly too): No, shade of my
heart...I have not....

Soun (concerned): What if....what if my daughter and your son are
dead?????? Our lines will never be joined.... WWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Nodoka (rolling her eyes): Oh, shuttup, Soun.....your bawling doesn't
help matters at all.....

(phone rings, Nabiki answers it)

Nabiki (to the phone): Tendo Residence.....Oh? Oh! OH! (slams down
the phone and turns to everyone else) It's amazing! Well, even
shocking.....Kasumi and Tofu are ENGAGED!

(everybody face faults ....save Nodoka)

Nodoka (smiling to herself and comments meant only for her ears): I
knew she had it in her.

(Soun stares in shock at first)

Soun (warming up to the dea): My daughter....Kasumi.....is ENGAGED!
(dances around the room) Genma-kun! We shall have a double wedding!
My two daughters married on the same day! (laughs almost manaically)
all we need to do is get Nabiki engaged! (he stops and peers at Nabiki
pondering)

Nabiki (at first pleased) (to herself): Good. Doctor bills taken care of.
(catching what her dad said and his look at her) NO WAY! NOT ME!
You're NOT going to pawn me off like Akane ......

Genma (smiling); We could always arrange it with Ryouga....

(Nabiki looks shocked...as does Nodoka....Genma NEVER shows that much
insight...)

Soun (starts): ....

Nodoka (cutting in): No. We will NOT do that, WILL we.....Soun?

Soun (gulping, thinking of Nodoka's katana): uhhh...no.

Nodoka (nodding): Good. (smiles) Two weddings will be enough as
is......it'll probably be more than we can afford in any case anyways....

(phone rings)

Nabiki (getting it again): AKANE! (everyone turns and looks) OH. MY
GAWD! (slams down the phone & turns to the rest of the crew) It's
Ranma...he's been in an accident! He's in the emergency room
now...being operated on....

Soun (bawling already): MY SON-IN-LAW!!!!!!!!!!! HE'S GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!

Genma-panda (signs): My son?!?!?!

Nodoka (shocked looking; doing a Kasumi): Oh my.....

(Everyone bursts out talking at once. Everyone is trying to find out
more about what happened. Nabiki at first holds her own in anwering at
a rate that she can keep up with what she knows...which is little. She
primarily answers 'I don't know', which satisifies little and causes more
questions to be asked and at an ever increasing rate...finally she gives
a final effort to push them away. She succeeds ....momentarily. The tidal
wave of people demanding her attention and information rush her once
more....overwhelming her).

(cut to the hospital. Akane and Ukyou are standing outside the door of
the operating room where Ranma was taken. Whenever someone walks
towards the doors that not a doctor or nurse...they glare at them
menacingly. )

Ukyou (turning to Akane slightly after scaring off a lost visitor): Akane.....

Akane (looking worried and ehr vocie starined): Yes, Ukyou?

Ukyou (looking strained too and not sure how to say what she wants to....):
....

Akane (looking surprised): Yes? What is it?

Ukyou (determined): Akane....do....(inhales deeply) do you ....(looks
frustrated and yet determined...) Akane. Do you love Ranma?

Akane (uncomfortable): I ummm.....uhhh...

Ukyou (serious; very serious): It's important Akane...one of us is going
to marry him. We're both engaged to him and if you don't love him you
ought to stand aside. (Akane looks shocked and mad, Ukyou presses on)
it's that I love him and want to take care of him....you being here
shows you care, but do you care like I do? It's important...especially
now that Ranma is hurt....when he recov...(she can't finish)

Akane (a little taken back; hugs Ukyou): He'll be okay. I promise.
He'll come out of this better than ever.....(holds her)

(Akane stands there hugging Ukyou and comforting her. After a bit,
Ukyou's tears dry and she pushes away).

Ukyou (edgy): I need to know. Do you love Ranma?

Akane (frustrated): I.....ummm...uhh....Ukyou. Why do you need to know?

Ukyou (grim): I've been watching the two of you recently. You've been
happier than before, yet you guys fight just as often. You are a bit
violent about things and Ranma a bit unfeeling too...for me....I need to
know....do you or do you not love Ranma.

Akane (looking determined herself): Ranma and I have grown closer than
before....we've had some very good times together recently (flash back
to the lunch....the games of pinch tag....and more).....

Ukyou (pressing on): That's not what I asked...

Akane (sighing): I .....I d....

(the doors slam open from inside and a hospital bed with Ranma on it is
wheeled out.....they only just dodge out of the way. Looking at each
other briefly they follow quickly after

He's wheeled into another room. The nurses attach sensors to him to
monitor his heart rate, blood pressure, and more. He's bandaged alot.
The sheets are pulled up around and tucked under his arms. He's
motionless....the nurses watch him for a time and leave....aparently to
get something or something of that nature. Ukyou and akane slip in and
each stand on separate side sof the bed)

Akane (looking down at him): He'll be alright.....I hope....

Ukyou (nodding with tears in her eyes): I...I am sure of it....He's
gotten worse from Ryouga....

Akane (is brave and runs a hand through his hair....adeptly avoiding any
bandages): I know he will. (tears starting to form) Ukyou.....(Ukyou
looks at her. Akane isn't looking at her though). I do love
him....very much (she looks up and smiles). I hope we can work
something out....

Ukyou (runs a hand through his hair too, looking down at him): .....

Akane (looking up): Ukyou?

Ukyou (takign Akane's hand): I'm sure we things will work out one way or
another, Akane. (looks up again at her). We'll find a way somehow.....

(cut to the gang as they pour through the front door of the hospital
emergency room....casualities are being taken to the public just from
the rampant avallanche of our characters)

Everyone (speaking at once): Where's my Ranma-sa----my son! -- Oh
my!-- grrrmph!--MY SON-IN-lAW!!! (cryign noises) PEOPLE! PEOPLE!--SHAMP--

Nurse (shouting): SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(dead quiet save for the rescue workers picking up the newly injured)

Nurse (starightening her hair and uniform; starined vocie): Now.
May I help you?

(We see her get get blasted again with the wind from everyone demanding
to know where Ranma is....She gets blown across the room from behind her
desk and into the wall. *BOOM* This time Nabiki is the one that shuts
them up).

Nabiki (annoyed): PEOPLE! PLEASE! Ki-blasting the nurse won't solve
anything.....so SHUT UP! (walks over to the dazzled nurse; helps her up;
brushing off her uniform) Now, now...see? No harm done....(steadying
the poor woman; the rest of the gang is worse than a goat with an itch
for wanting to voice-blast her again with questions) Now. May I ask
after a patient that you should have here? (nodding to her and the
nurse) of course.....I'd like to inquire after Ranma Saotome if I may....

Nurse (nodding a little uncertain): I.....I....I can check.

Nabiki (smiling imperiosly): Good....that will work.

Nurse (checking her books): Ah! Him! The one where the guards nearly
shot two young women claiming that their his fiancees.....there as a
delay and they demanded he be treated immediately.....they won
out....Ranma Saotome...room 117-A. The two young women have passes and
I assume are with him.

Nabiki (nodding) Arigato. (turning to the rest of the gang....who are
twicthing badly from holding in their anxiety and questions...) See?
Got the answer right quick. Now. Shall we go see Ranma? (starts for
the elevator)

Nurse (grabbing her and blocking the way): AHEM! Only one person other
than the two young women thatare up there may go up at a time.....rules
are rules.....(obviously recovered)

(Everyone looks at each other....and a riot nearly starts)

(cut to Ranma's room....Ukyou and Akane are standing next to Ranma's bed
and talking. They are remincing over things Ranma has done.)

Ukyou (voice steady, but worried): ...then there was time he faced
Kodachi in the ring....(smiles, if weakly) He did show he cared enough
to take her on.....

Akane (smiling slightly and nodding): Hai. He can be very sweet at
times, but he can be so insensitive too.....it's a weird mix for a fiance....
but all Ranma.....What about us? What are we going to do, Ukyou?
Something has to happen between us....friends? Are we going to share
him? (jealousy creeps in her voice there) Or are we going to have to
duel over him?

Ukyou (shaking ehr head): I don't know. I DO know that we are going to
have to settle the OTHER fiancees of his first. I DO like what you did
to Shampoo. With any luck she'll be stuck there and that way until
after Ranma is married....to one of us....as for Kodachi.....

Akane (nodding grimly): We'll take care of her.....

Doctor (clears his throat): Ahem. Excuse me? Are you two this young
man's......fiancees? Like the report says?

Akane and Ukyou (together): Hai!

Doctor (nodding and smiling slightly): A very lucky young man.....in
many ways....(the doctor launches into a detailed medical explanation of
everything that was broken, injured, and damaged...the two young women
get lost quickly and can't make heads nor tails of what he said....it
does sound horrible to the extreme....Ukyou and Akane are clutching at
each other by the time the doctor is done) Okay?

Akane (worried; barely able to get the courage to ask); Will....
(falters)

Ukyou (picks it up): ....he.....(falters)

Doctor (raising an eyebrow): Live? It is logical. (smiles) He
should....he's built like a freight train and seems to have a natural ability
to heal very quickly....The hard part is telling whether or not he'll
come out of that coma he's in....

(cut to Nodoka wandering the halls looking for the room holding her
son...)

Nodoka (thinking): He's alright....just a scratch.....why can't I find
the blasted room? I'm not a Hibiki!

(cut to the waiting room and the gang twitching like they're covered in
ants....)

Kodachi (muttering to herself): My Ranma-sama! How could his have
possibily have happened to you? You are so great in the ways of martial
arts....how could you have been merely hit by a semi?

Kunou (overhearing and cutting in): He deserved it, the honorless
cretin.....Fate hath declared it. Low and Saotome was brought low...tis
for his treatment of Akane and the Pig Tailed Girl.....

Ryouga (cutting in angrily); You stupid oaf! No one deserves
this....not even Ranma. He may not treat Akane the best, but he sure
wouldn't actually wish this on ANYONE.....

Kunou (dismissive tone); I trifle not with commoners such as
yourself....be gone with thine simplistic opinions of matters....

Kodachi (wrapping him with the ribbon and flinging him out the door):
That....was enough of that...AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Nabiki (almost...praying?): Please, Lord, if Ranma must marry Kodachi
according to the fates....let him die....I ask not of myself...well,
alright. I ask almost foremost as myself, but Kodachi as an in-law is
horrifying and if he sticks around at all I'll go insane! Let him
alright though, otherwise, dear lord....he's not too bad of a barbarian
otherwise....

Soun (bawling): My Son-in-law!!!!!! WAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Genma (growling noises): 'Son will be okay. He is a great martial
artist.'

(cut to Dr. Tofu and Kasumi almost skipping...hand in hand....to the
Tendo Dojo. They find the front locked and Kasumi opens it...they are
too much in love to notice that this is not normal....They walk inside
and find no one.....)

Kasumi (grinning almost evilly); Now, now....it's not SAFE to have a
groom alone with the bride before the wedding! And it's not right
either...(winks)

Dr. Tofu (giggling slightly, nervously): Uh huh....(laughs) I totally
agree....I do have to wonder where everyone is....

(they wander into the kitchen and find a note above the stove and
another one on the door of the fridge....it seems that they weren't told
because they had been gone from Dr. Tofu's clinic by the Nabiki had
finished explaining to the gang about what Akane had said....)

Kasumi (after reading note): Oh My!

(cut to Nodoka. She has found the room. She is watching Ukyou and
Akane. She smiles at them before remembering her son is what they are
standing there over....)

Nodoka (worried): Akane...?

Akane (turning): Nodoka-san? (runs over to her and hugs her tight)
I....I....tried to get him as soon as possible....he's hurt and badly.
They say he is in a coma and they don't know when he'll come out. . .
(turning to Ukyou) Nodoka-san...this is Ukyou.....she's Ranma's other
fiancee....she helped me...

Nodoka (nodding): Genma mentioned this.....(bows to Ukyou) I am glad to
meet you. I wish I could have under other circumstances though. It
seems my son is most fortunate to have two fiancees that care so much
for him.....

Ukyou (bowing in return): Arigato, Nodoka-san.

Nodoka (turning to Ranma): Come, the two of you, tell me what the doctor
said....

(cut to Asuza and Shampoo-cat at Asuza's home. Shampoo-cat is in a
cage....with a half dozen other 'cute' animals. She s obviously not a
happy camper.)

Azusa (walking up): Oh! Jeane Lynnette! (swings open the cage and
scoops out Shampoo faster than Shampoo can move out away; cuddles her
horribly) I'm gonna love ya, and squeeze ya....

Shampoo-cat (thinking): Gah. Shampoo must escape.....

Azusa (looks away for a second; gets distracted and sees something
cuter): Claude! My Claude! Come to me!!!!! (drops Shampoo-cat and she
scampers away)

(We see Shampoo-cat go through hell to escape Asuza's household.
Alligators in a moat outside; an electrical fence, etc.)

Shampoo-cat: Akane will pay!

(a week has past and Shampoo-cat has returned to the Nekohaten. Her
grandmother douses her in hot water and listens to Shampoo's tale. She
is most displeased and sets Shampoo to work as punishment. Shampoo
still has enough time that at night she steals away to watch the
hospital room from outside that Ranma is in. (Akane and Ukyou had her
banned from visiting) She is watching this night and ignores all else
to exclusion.)

Shampoo (lamenting): Oh Ranma. Get well so can take Shampoo to date.....

(a shadow moves up behind Shampoo)

Shampoo (lamenting still and obviously to all else): Hurry Ranma get better.

Shadow (voice female): Are you watching my Ranma-sama?

Shampoo (jumps into defensive position): Who you?

Shadow (standing idling): Come now, Shampoo. We are not enemies in
this....I have been banned from seeing my Ranma-sama.....I think we can
make an accommodation to dispose of Tendo and Kounji....

(fades to black)

(We see Akane and Ukyou becoming greater and greater friends. They eat
lunch together, spend all their time together, and work on homework
together....Akane picks up waiting at the Ucchan. Ukyou attempts to
teach the art of making okinamiyaki to Akane. Akane picks up the
nickname for Ukyou that Ranma uses, Ucchan, and Ukyou starts calling
Akane, Acchan...two weeks have past. Akane and Ukyou have been going to
the hospital daily for Ranma and spending what time they can with
him....even though he's out cold)

(We cut to Ukyou and Akane leaving Furinkan High after school is out.
They are slowly walking and talking together. Obvious to everyone
else. Worry has aged them.)

Ukyou (talking to keep from being 'alone' with her worries): Same plan
tonight, Acchan?

Akane (nodding): Hai, Ucchan!

(a shadow....then another appears in front of them...they stop)

Kodachi (growling): You will renounce your claims to my Ranma-sama....

(the second shadow speaks)

Shadow: And no tricks. Shampoo no like what Akane did to her. Was
hell! Little girl dress up Shampoo and call her cute! Bah! Now you
two die!

(Ukyou and Akane look at each other and sigh...they unlimber their weapons...)

Ukyou (to Akane): After you....

Akane (bowing back): No....I insist....after you....

Ukyou (smiling grimly and bowing): Arigato.....HI-YA!!!!!!!!!!!!! (she
springs into action and swings her spat such that it appears that she's
going to sweep out Kodachi's legs when in fact she reverses the downward
motion and splats her against a tree. Akane attacks Shampoo and a dust
cloud raises up obscuring everything).

(The dust settles. We see two bloody smashed pulps on the grown and two
shadows walking away)

Shadow 1 (to Shadow 2); You'd think they'd learn....

Shadow 2 (nodding): I know....everyday for the last two weeks....they're
as bad as Kunou for Ranchan.....

(We see that Akane has been going every day to the hospital after
school. She's been diligent and caring for Ranma. She comes and tells
him of things that have happened at school and at home even though he
probably can't understand or hear what she is saying....After closing
time at Ucchan's, Ukyou comes and takes over for her. This becomes the
routine.)

(One day, Akane and Ukyou decide to switch. Akane comes in the evening
after doing her homework while Ukyou, who wanted a break from working at
Ucchan's, went that afternoon. We see Akane walking down the hall
towards Ranma's room...)

Akane (thinking): It's been a nearly a month.....Ranma...(sighs) why did
you have to come after me? Why couldn t you have stayed where you
were.....I'd rather I'd been hit than you....(she looks around and
realizes she's walked past the door. She shakes her head and smiles
while walking back to the door). (outloud) Ucchan? You here? (no answer)

(Akane sees Ukyou asleep in a chair next to the bed.. Her hand is
holding Ranma's)

Akane (thinking): Poor girl....I understand though. (quick flash of
jealousy at the hand) I wish she'd not hold....(shakes her head) It's
Ucchan....not Shampoo or Kodachi! (she walks over to Ukyou and smiles.
She gentled wakes her.) (whispering) Ucchan! Ucchan! Wake up!

Ukyou (waking up): Ranchan????? (looks excited and deflates when she
sees it's Akane) Oh. Hi. I'm sorry. I was dreaming about Ranchan.

Akane (smiles and nodding): Okay (nodding) I dream of him
too...frequently. (changing the subject, winking) My turn with him.
You need to get home and get some sleep and food.

Ukyou (nodding): Hai! (sighs and extracts her hand...she fondly rubs
Ranma's hair. She sits and stares at him for a moment) Alright.
(stands suddenly) I better get now if I am going to at all.

Akane (nodding): I'll see you tomorrow morning at school....Alright?

Ukyou (nodding): Hai! (hugs Akane) I'll see you later, Acchan. Take
good care of Ranchan for me....(leaves)

Akane (looking after Ukyou; to herself): I would trade our friendship
and my health, Ucchan, to see Ranchan better...

(Akane settles down. She gives her ceremonial kiss to the forehead of
Ranma...something she does every time see comes and settles down. She
takes his hand and begins to read some of the news from the paper that
she brought. She tells him of Nodoka's pregnancy and how he's going to
have a sibling. A boy Nodoka thinks. She also tells of the fight
Ryouga and Kunou got into over her and how they beat each other into the
ground. She tells of everything she can think of her thoughts, her
feelings, etc. Of her friendship with Ukyou as well. Of the fight
between her and Kodachi. She eventually runs out of things to say and
settles down. She reads to him her class assignment of one of the
classics. Eventually, she sits and simply watches him. Finally, she
falls asleep.)

Akane (wakening): .....uh. huh? (looks around confused) What time is
it...(scrunches her eyebrows together)(yawns). Geez. It's late. I
better get home for some DECENT sleep before school. (looks at Ranma)
Oh, Ranchan...silly how I picked that up from Ucchan , huh? Well, I
better go. (she collects her stuff and puts it in her bookbag) I love
you, Ranchan....my fiance. Come back to us.....(she bends to kiss him
on the forehead again, pauses briefly and runs a hand through his hair.
She smiles and then kisses his forehead).

Ranma (blinking his eyes open): Akane?

Akane (eyes as wide as saucers): Ranchan? (she pulls back)

Ranma (smiling through his scabbed lips; speaking softly): Hi,
(obviously with a lot of love) you kawaikune tomboy...

Akane (tears in her eyes): Hentai......

(fade to black)

(end part 3)

*cackles* I've been surprised with the reception ...After All This
Time?! Has been getting. At best I would consider myself a third rate
two (well, maybe 1 1/2) bit writer...I've been very surprised and
pleased. Thank you to Biles-san for his quick critique of the first
episode...I hope to get more. Thank you to the author of the Split
Personalityies for the EXTENSIVE review I recieved on the fanfic. This
also goes for all of the really kewl individuals who poked me enough to
draw RL for a sec to continue. Have no fear, I've got this one already
plotted out (and fortunately memorized...some j*ck*ss stole the disk with
the stories on it...grr...).

At any rate, back, by popular demand, the return of ....

**************************************************
******RANMA 1/2: .....After All This Time?!******
**************************************************

All rights reserved by the Takahashi Goddess and her minions. I am
merely borrowing her characters.

Episode 4: The Things That Change...

(We sit back and watch Ranma's slow, but steady recovery. Ukyou and Akane
are at his side whenever possible. First...he's in a wheel chair and we
watch him hate it...time passes, a month or two)

(Akane is at his right and Ukyou at his left...he's wheeling out of the
Furinkan High School front doors...Akane and Ukyou are talking lively and
including Ranma as much as they can. He's quietly fuming...and they can
tell, but aren't quite sure what to do...)

(They reach the stairs)

Ranma (attempting to get up again, bitter): "I am going to walk down
those stairs if it's the last thing I *DO*."(thrusts himself up from his
wheel chair using his arms...obviously, based on the amount of work being
done by his arms, his legs aren't quite functional yet...they're
recovering, but slowly...even Ranma can't simply shrug off being hot
by a semi.)

(Akane and Ukyou grab him and start scolding him in a practiced manner...it
seems Ranma has attempted this before and apparently frequently...)

Akane (patient, but not happy): Ranchan, please, your legs need to recover
more yet...we've had this argument for the past two weeks since you've
been back...please, for me...

Ukyou (sighing): Ranchan, for us...please? You won't recover
your full abilities if you abuse yourself before you're
ready...please...wait...(she and Akane are holding him down...not easily,
he's strong, but not so hard as they would have before...it's obvious
Ranma is not up to snuff...)

Ranma (sighing, resigned, but bitter): Some martial artist I am...

(They turn him around and begin to take him down the steps...he resents
it...hates it...loathes his condition...especially with what happens
next...everyday...)

(The girls get him down the steps. Then like clockwork, after having
wheeled himself a good 3 meters, thunder flashes. He sighs and stops)

Kuno: Kur...The Vengeance of Heaven is slow but sure...you are a lowly
scum, Saotome...(Ranma's anger is building)you are weak and must depend upon
others for your strength now...(He's working on bursting) I will not
challenge you for you are weak...(His face is bulging...eyes wild) the true
warrior harms not the invalid...(He's about to burst)

Akane (snarling to herself, replies): The true warrior doesn't
mock the weak either, Kuno...If you must fight, fight one of us...we're
his champions 'til he's better....you know this, you've done this
daily...for the past two weeks...

(Ukyou is furious and unlimbers her massive spat)

Kuno (eyes impassive): How simple things must be to you, oh my Huntress
(Ranma is about to commit murder...wheel chair or no wheel chair) very
well... should I win, I shall allow you to date with me! (He lowers his
bokken).

Akane (viciously snarling aloud): Ranchan has my heart..who would
want to date such an over stuffed, pompous ass like yourself! (she moves
into a fighting stance; Ukyou moves into one as well, but not to fight
Kuno...Kodachi nearly successfully stole Ranchan once while they were
pummeling Ranma's rivals...not again...The other students stream by..this
is nothing new to them)

Ranma (bursting): *ENOUGH!* This is *MY* fight. Kuno is *MY*
rival, not yours Acchan or yours Ucchan...Let Me AT *HIM*! (Ukyou
reaches for the back of his chair distractedly...watching the
trees...Kodachi must be there somewhere...or Shampoo...Ranma's reaction
was also normal for this event...)

Kuno (mockingly): Your women now carry your honor, Saotome...how
much this is true for a martial artist...a true martial artist..(Ranma's
effeorts to free himself from Ucchan's grasp on the back of his chair are
redoubled and yet...are equally useless...) Very well, Akane TENDO
(saying in such a way to mock Ranma), I accept your challenge now
formally...prepare yourself...

Ukyou (half mumbling and watching the trees and other places of possible
concealment): Whatever Kuno...you lack brain cells to the point of
having to repeat yourself...daily too...

Kuno (outraged): WHAT! YOU COMMONER! (raises his bokken and
charges Ukyou....)

(Ukyou rounds and turns to face the attack...letting go of Ranma in the
process inadvertantly...Ranma charges full throttle in his chair...Kuno
dodges around Ranma easily and charges Ukyou...the two become a flurry of
bokken and massive spatulas...Akane is sighing and trying to grab Ranma
who keeps trying to manuaver to attack Kuno...)

(Kuno and Ukyou stop for breath...based on the wounds exchanged Ukyou is
better, but Kuno still isn't to be underestimated...)

Kuno (breathing heavily): You are good Kounji...but not good
enough!

Ukyou (breathing less heavily than Kuno, but still recovering from the
exhanges): Same to you Kuno...you pompous ass...

Kuno (outraged for being degraded by a woman so): WHAT! (prepares
to charge and....Akane mallets him good over the head...he collapses...)

Akane (smirking): Sorry Ucchan, but Ranchan needs to get to his
appointment with Tofu-sensei...time is short...

Ukyou (nodding): Tis okay, Acchan...he takes precedence over the
joy of smacking Kuno around. Let's go...

(Ranma sits...in bleak and obvious misery....a girl...a PAIR of girls are
his defenders...slumped...he let's Akane and Ukyou wheel him to Dr Tofu's...)

(A pair of eyes watch from the tower above the school entrance...knowingly.)

(The girls wheel him along, trying to cheer him up and make him
smile...they do eventually, and are relieved...this too is part of their
daily ritual and they all play their parts well...)

(Inside Dr Tofu's. Dr Tofu is in the back examining Ranma...talking with
him good naturedly. Akane and Ukyou are in the front chatting nervously
and also watching the perimeter...Shampoo and Kodachi have tried
kidnapping Ranma from here too...less successfully, but still tried...Dr
Tofu has demonstrated his prowness as a martial artist more than once...)

Dr Tofu (cheerfully): You're coming along nicely, Ranma. I'm glad to
say that you should be out of the wheel chair and onto some crouches in a
few days...

Ranma (looking hopeful): I should hope so, Tofu-sensei. I've been
doing everything you requested for excercises...they're nothing on what I
used to do for workouts...(trying to sound macho as usual)

Dr Tofu (smiling): Good...Good...I'm glad to hear it. How are
things with your personal life...a patient's health is more than just his
body....

Ranma (uncomfortable): They're fine...

Dr Tofu (nodding to himself knowingly...it's obvious Ranma is bluffing):
Decided on which to pick between Ukyou and Akane?

Ranma (sighing): No...I wish it were simple...they're both too
understanding ...too nice...almost smotheringly so...no worries about me
picking Kodachi or Shampoo...I just wish those psychotics would leave me
alone...I wish my love life were as simple as yours and Kasumi's...

Dr Tofu (nodding and smiling happily): We do fine...you'll sort things
out..I'm quite sure...

(Ranma nods and is escorted out to Ukyou and Akane, who sigh with relief
at seeing him again)

Dr Tofu (to the young women): He'll be fine. A few more days and he'll
getting onto a pair of crutches instead of the wheel chair. He's been
good about his excercises it seems (Ranma puffs up), but make sure he
doesn't over do things too quickly, ne? (Ranma deflates remembering this
afternoon).

Ukyou and Akane (in unison): Hai, Tofu-sensei!

Dr Tofu (nodding): Good. Akane, tell Kasumi I'll be calling later
after I close up. Tell her to keep at those studies...I'll enjoy having
her be my wife and aide...(he phases out for a second and shakes off the
fog as the girls giggle).

Ranma (rolling his eyes): We better be going...

Ukyou and Akane (in unison): Hai, Ranchan! Goodbye, Tofu-sensei!
Thank you!

(The trio roll off into the closing darkness...)

Dr Tofu (speaking to himself as he watches the trio roll off): I envy
you not, Ranma....I envy you not...

(We see Ranma be "treated" a combined meal by Ukyou and Akane...he freaks
at first from Akane's food, but realizes that Ukyou has been teaching her,
and WORKING (and HOW!) with her on her cooking abilities...they leave
Ucchan's and head back to the Tendo residence. The trio are laughing and
giggling together...Ranma zips around the two girls and attempts to "run
over" Akane for calling him hentai-chan...then the girls both start
chanting and taunting him (good naturedly) as he chases them around in
his wheel chair...something -someone- is watching...they know it not
though...)

(They finally reach the Tendo Dojo and Ukyou takes her leave...this too
is part of the ritual..)

Ukyou (smiling sadly): Good night, Ranchan...(she bends down and kisses
his forehead, Akane flinches slightly...still...she masks it as Ucchan
turns to her and gives her a good hug..) Good night to you too,
Acchan...(surprisingly, she bends and smooches Akane's ear...which while
not anything too strange startles Akane...)

Ukyou (waving): Nite, guys!

Akane and Ranma: Nite, Ucchan!

(The two wait for Ukyou to fade from sight and turn to go inside...)

(Akane and Ranma are chatted with by their parents. Soun and Genma
afterwards go back to their game of shoji. Akane relays the message for
Kasumi. Kasumi beams and continues cleaning and chatting with
Nodoka...whose starting to feel the effects of pregnancy. Nabiki is
outside and waiting to see if Ryouga makes it around for their attempts
at nightly talks... Akane and Ranma make their way to the dojo and work
on stretching and working out Ranma's legs...they are watched
however....by not just one set of eyes...)

Akane (smiling and quite unaware of the eyes): I'm happy for you Ranchan
that you'll get to get out of that chair soon!

Ranma (puffing a bit): Yah...it'll be nice...I'll finally get to clobber
Kuno and crew again! (grinning) I could do it now if you guys would let me.

Akane (smiling indulgently): Yes, dear, whatever you say...

Ranma (a little miffed): I could ya kaiwakune tom-

Akane (knowing this would be his reaction): Ha! Nyah!

Ranma (lightening up a bit, but still a bit bitter inside): Nyah!

(Akane helps Ranma from up off the floor mat and into his wheel chair and
they go inside the house proper)

A voice from teh shadows: I hope this work out...my Ranchan...my
Acchan...what's wrong with me? (With a sob the shadowy voice recedes).

Another voice from somewhere else in the shadows...also watching, but not
where it could have heard the first or be heard: Ranma-sama...I
WILL save you...(this voice recedes)

The final watcher says nothing, but watches, very malovalently, watches
intently.

(Back in the house, Ranma is being helped up the stairs to his and
Akane's room...the family felt it best that he and his fiancee stay in
the same place (and away from a very pregnant mother) The one place
left was Akane's room, where she could take care of him.)

(Akane bends and puts Ranma to bed. Much to his chagrin, she is a bit
over smothering...not too much, but a bit...his resentment of having to be
taken care of is noticeable, but Akane seems to be used to it...)

Akane (yawning and having changed in the bathroom): Night my
hentai-chan...

Ranma (grumbling): Good night...

(The lights flick off)

(The next day dawns...we see Ranma being bathed with help from Akane...he
resents this too, but not too much...she knows when not to stare and when
to be helpful...it's something that they've worked out between them.
Nodoka, Genma, and Akane help him down the stares...he quite vehemontly
feeds himself and gets the rest of his stuff together and with Nabiki and
Akane they leaves the house. All the time, something-someone-is
watching...)

(Ukyou greets them at the gate and escorts them to school...the four of
them all talk on their way...midway, the fiancees sigh and unlimber their
weapons...they normally encounter a hygiene product in the general area...)

(Bicycle sounds can be heard...the girls sigh...Ranma and Nabiki wait in
the wings)

Shampoo (bright and happy as usual): Nihao! Where Shampoo's Ranma?
Must Shampoo fight violent tomboy and not-nice-girl again?

AKane (stone voiced): Go away Shampoo...he's not yours...

Ukyou (agreeing and not sounding any nicer): He's taken, twice
over...get used to it, there's no more room...

Shampoo (growling): Stupid girls...Shampoo have to teach
lesson...(she whips out her bonbori...)

(The girls are obviously preparing to fight)

Ranma (struggles free of Nabiki...who squawks and comes after him):
SHAMPOO! STOP! LEAVE THEM BE!

Shampoo (looking at Ranma with her head cocked): Husband? Why
intervene? Shampoo must show husband she love him!

Ranma (sad and dejected): Shampoo...I...(looks inward and
beaten in some ways...changed in many others...) ....I don't....don't love
you and I never will.

Shampoo (outraged): Violent tomboy cast spell on husband....BREAK IT!
(she launches an attack at Akane...ignoring all else)

(As usual, Shampoo gets smacked into the ground by one of the
girls...this time, Ukyou...and the four moved on...)

(We see the day go on. Ranma struggling up and down stairs; he refuses
to use the elevator. Akane and Ukyou pushing him up the stairs,
grimacing. We see Ranma dozing occasionally in class, but more subtle
than before. We see Akane get the adoration of her Home Ec class when
she finally cooks something that's nonlethal nor living...we see
Ukyou striding back and forth in front of the board explaining her proof
in Calc...)

(Lunch)

(We see Akane, Ukyou, and Ranma all talking by themselves...they've
become a bit of a clique in and of themselves...they don't necessarily
neglect their friends, but they're definitely closer now. We see them
talking for a while at lunch and then we see Akane break off and run
over to a pair of people we've seen before...she brings them back)

Akane (beaming a bit): Ranma, I'd like you to meet some friends of mine...
This is Jana Glicker and Tudor Bartice...they're the students that
nearly...well, ran us over (she giggles...the two students look a little
embarassed..) They're from the US and visiting for a semester...

Ranma (not sure what to say..): Hello....

(It's obvious that they're a bit lost for words too....Jana breaks the
ice though).

Jana (in broken Japanese): Hello, Ranma. We've heard a lot about
you...how are you feeling? Better I hope!

Tudor: Hai! I hope you are better and get well soon...

Ranma (smiling): Thank you. We'll see how I come out...I'm sure
I'll be as good as ever very shortly...(he smiles up, but not totally
happily that it's upwards...the two Americans are quite tall...both
being over 185 cm)

Tudor (nodding and noticing the discomfort, sits): Hai! (tugs Jana down)
What do you like to do?

Ranma (smiling): I'm a martial artist...of the anything
goes...unrestricted variety...I'm rather good too...

Tudor (chuckling): Modest as well..

Ranma (chuckling back): Of course, but it's deserved...(smiling) How
about you guys? Are you martial artists..?

Jana (shaking her head): Not unless track, basketball, and soccer
count...

Tudor (smiling still): No, sorry. Swim team and computers are my game.
I did learn some Kung Fu from an uncle, but he's theonly one that could
remotely be called a martial artist...not I...

Ranma (nodding): Which variety? Hopefully not (shudders) Cat Fu...

Tudor (looks perplexed): No....sorry...Shao lin, if I recall
correctly. He spoke of others, but they were supposed to be rather
different...Tiger and Praying Mantis...

Ranma (nodding again knowingly): Sounds like he knew a bit...not
as much, but a bit...

(The group talked some more and then the Americans split off...as they
were leaving the area, Jana smacked Tudor upside the head and shouted,
"TAG" and ran off...Tudor thundered in pursuit....the trio just shook
their collective head...)

(The day wore on...we see Akane working through her Chem labs, we see
Ukyou talking with friends, we see Ranma dashing down the halls with Mrs
Kuno (the former Ms Hinako) in hot pursuit of the deviant...the school
day ends...through it all...something was watching..)

(the girls roll Ranma out the door and all seem relatively
happy this day...they help him down the stairs and both are surprised
when he doesn't protest...then thunder flashes...)

Voice: The vengeance of Hevane is slow but sure....

Ranma (rolling his eyes): Damnit, Kuno, can't you learn a new
phrase for attempting to attack us?

Kuno (shocked): Well, my dear invalid, (Ranma growls) I am sure that good
taste is worth repeating....especially if it relates to me.

Ranma : Oh sure, Kuno...you know best....(sarcasm rather thick there for
the sarcasm.net.impaired)

(Ukyou's turn to challenge him has come up and she turns to do so when
Ranma darts ahead of them...)

Akane & Ukyou (shocked): Ranchan!

Ranma (to Kuno): Try me on for size...

Kuno (dismissively): I trifle not with the crippled! (turns his head)

Ranma (cocky): Oh yeah? (rams him...hard)

Ukyou and Akane (wide eyed): ....

Ranma (spinning the wheels as fast as he can runs over Kuno and stops
atop him): *NEVER* discount the guy in the wheel chair....NEVER, Kuno...

(Kuno lifts up Ranma...who knows he's in trouble)

Ranma (eyes wide): Uh oh...

Kuno (mockingly): Yet the invalid challenges me still...I will have
to teach him a a lesson...

Ranma (smirks): Oh yeah?

(Ranma spins the wheels VERY quickly, catching Kuno's hands in
them...Kuno cries out and drops Ranma who lands and peels out throwing
rocks and dust into Kuno...with his good hand Kuno rounds on Ranma...who
is grinning like a fool...The two girls stand shocked to their core...Was
Ranma nuts?)

Kuno (grimacing): RANMA SAOTOME! PREPARE TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Kuno charged. Ranma moved out of the way and shouted his battle cry,
zipping behind Kuno and clobbers him, hitting him with hundreds of
punches. Kuno stumbles from the kidney punches and falls to the
ground...Ranma promptly runs him over and over and over. Finally he
stops; his tire above Kuno's face and spins it fast. Then he rolls
over to the two dazed women and smiles)

Ranma (grinning ear to ear): Told ya I could do it Acchan...Nyah!

(the two girls smile and scold him...half heartedly as they
leave....Again, something watched as they left, silently)

Kuno (falteringly, with skid marks on his face..): Even in a wheel
chair he's a pain in the ...*passes out*

(The day passes and Ukyou and Akane go through their ritual yet again.
At the gates of the Tendo Dojo, they exchange their goodbyes once
more...yet something is a little different...like the night before. Yet
none are quite sure what it is. Again, something-someone-is
watching...and this time, they feel that. After a bit, Ukyou and Akane
look out into the dark. Neither is quite sure what is wrong there...but
they also feel something else too. Ranma is itching from something
bothering him as well. They all wish one another good night and Ukyou
leaves. Ranma and Akane both head into the house.)

Voice from the dark (feminine): Oh Ranma-sama....

Another voice (feminine): Husband get better so take Shampoo on date...

Yet another voice (not human): *snarls*

(cut to Ukyou walking home)

Ukyou (thinking): Before that creepy feeling came over us, things
felt strange...(furrows her brow) I wonder what caused that creepy
feeling...it was strange...(she moves off toward Ucchan's...the
shadows seem oily and deep...)

(cut to the first voice...)

Voice (not quite sane): Oh Ranma-sama, how I long for your
embrace...(just then...she realizes something doesn't quite feel right,
something is very...very...WRONG...)

Another voice (maculine): I'm here, my Ko-chan...

Kodachi (shadowed and in a tree): huh? (spins around) Ranma-sama?

Dark figure (obviously Ranma's voice though): Yes, Ko-chan?

Kodachi (eyes wide...): Ranma-sama...is that really you?

Ranma (stepping into the moonlight): Yes, Ko-chan...it's me...

Kodachi (moves closer...butsomething doesn't quite feel right to
her...she knew that Ranma-sama would come to her eventually, but ... ):
My darling! (she shrugs off the odd feeling and runs to him laughing)
AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! (she runs to him and embraces him...she pulls
back) You're cold...? (she looks confused)

Ranma (smiling...a bit twistedly to the normal eye in better light):
I'm fine...especially now...

(Then....the screaming started...)

(end part 4)
Will Baird InterNet: wba...@nmsu.edu chpw...@arriba.nm.org
#include disclaimer.h Web Page: http://essex.nmsu.edu/~scomputi/
Creator of the KU, "After All This Time", Jordanite, Ranma 1/2 Addict, & More
"The Creator made women to please the eye and trouble the mind" -RJ, tFoH

Here we go folks. Next installment. Wish me luck!

*******************************************************************************
********************Ranma 1/2:.....After All This Time?!***********************
*******************************************************************************

All rights reserved by the Takahashi Goddess and her minions. I am
merely borrowing her characters.

Episode 5: ...The Worse They Become

(We see Ranma and Akane deftly avoid the parental discussion tonight as
they make their way into the house and upstairs. Both are tired and want
sleep, although they both have things they have to do. But they're, at
least temporarily, going to skip them for tonight. They head for the
bathroom. Akane helps strip Ranma and helps him haltingly to the
bathtub from his wheelchair. Akane fills the bath..)

Ranma (relaxing): Ah....(suddenly bolts upright out the tub and
is standing on his hands on the edge of the tub) HEY! THAT'S TOO HOT,
YOU KAWAIIKUNE TOMBOY!

Akane (shocked reaction fading to amusement): Alright, it's not hot
now. (She smirks) Poor baby...glad your reactions haven't slowed up.

Ranma (testing the water with his toes): Yeah, yeah. Whatever...Nyah!

Akane (giggling): Nyah!

(Ranma slides down into the water and relaxes. Akane moves behind him
and scrubs his back clean. She then begins to rub it, massaging
his muscles.)

Akane (almost purring into his ear): You could always do your
exercises in here, ya know...

Ranma (who IS purring): yeah...

(Nekohatten)

(We see Shampoo just getting back from somewhere. She's been doing
something that's made her rather sweaty. (CHILL YOU D*MN HENTAI'S!) She
goes up stairs and cleans up. After a few minutes, she comes down stairs
and is met by Cologne and Mousse.)

Cologne (in Chinese): <Where have you been, great-granddaughter?
Winning future-son-in-law over I hope? You have been rather lax in that
recently>

Shampoo (uncomfortable): <Ranma have spell cast on him by tomboy.
He say he no love Shampoo!> (obviously in anguish by the end of her
reply) <Shampoo can no get close to Husband. Not-Nice-Girl and Violent
Tomboy Akane guard him during day and family at night. Is very hard>

(Mousse stands passive, but his eyes are starting to gleam with hope.
Neither Cologne or Shampoo notice this.)

Cologne (angry): <Failure is not acceptable, Shampoo. You know
this. You will redouble your efforts or there will be consequences...>
(She whirls on her staff and bounces out of the room, obviously in a fury).

(Shampoo begins to shed a few tears, but is obviously trying to not let
it show...she's an Amazon after all, not a weakling.)

Mousse (sounding consoling): I'm sorry, Shampoo, that Ranma doesn't
love you...

Shampoo (rounding angrily on Mousse): Husband love me! Just under
spell! (Fury paints her features in an unflattering way)

Mousse (backing off a bit, but pressing his attack): If that's the case,
Shampoo, why hasn't he come to you yet? Why haven't you been able to
convince or use magic on him, or anything else, Shampoo? Akane has a
magic on him alright, but it's not one that's created by spells...

Shampoo (her bonbori in hand): MOUSSE LIE! (stalks towards him) TAKE BACK!

Mousse (shaking his head, almost sad): No, Shampoo, I won't. I may be
obsessed with you, but I do recognize love when I see it...

Shampoo (screaming): MOUSSE LIE! MOUSSE LIE! LIE! (She beats him into
the ground. Mousse offers no resistance; which robs Shampoo of the delight
of the fight. She runs off crying.)

Voice (heard weakly from the other room): Mousse lie...(sobbing follows)

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou walks up to her restaraunt and unlocks the door. She's whistling a
bit, but it's obvious to those that know her that she's upset...VERY
upset. Something is bothering her and she isn't sure what it is per se,
but she knows it's something fundemental to her. In all ways. She
closes and locks the door behind her. Things are dark, but seem normal,
then, something moves in that Dark...and it's not Ukyou.)

(The Tendo's)

(The bathroom. Akane jerks upright, and Ranma gets his back
wrenched...Akane's hands are contorting him like only Dr Tofu had been
able to previously.)

Akane (eyes wide): What's that?

(The screaming continues)

Ranma (grimacing with pain): I....don't.....know....Akane....it....*HURTS*

(The screams turn animal in nature. Hoarse. Inhuman, but from a human
throat.)

Akane (looking down, yet still frightened): OH, RANCHAN! (she
uncontorts him fairly well..if a bit inexpertly. Ranma grunts with
the pain). I'll be back, Ranchan. I'm going to go see what it is.
(smooching him briefly on the head)

Ranma (nodding): Alright. Be careful. Happosai might have
unleashed something.

Akane (standing up and nodding): I will. (She runs for the door,
careful not to slip).

(Nekohatten)

(Shampoo is back in her room, crying. Mousse stands at the door and
knocks. His face is contorted in pain...emotional, not physical. He
wants her, but not to harm her.)

Shampoo (wiping her eyes): Who there? oh...it you Mousse. What you
want?

Mousse (stepping in the room barely): I came to apologize Shampoo. I
wanted to say I'm sorry. I should have kept my opinions to myself.

Shampoo (still hurt, but nodding): Shampoo understand, Mousse.
Please, Go?

Mousse (shaking his head): No...If I can't be your husband this night, I
can be a friend. May I come in?

Shampoo (nodding jerkily): Hai...

(Ucchan's)

(The Dark envelopes her like a thick oil. Ukyou moves to the light
switch. She's still troubled. Did she really feel a thrill at kissing
Akane on the ear? That worries her greatly. She's not that way...not at
all! She's a GIRL, damnit, A *GIRL*... yet....)

Ukyou (mumbling to herself): Sh*t. The light switch isn't working.
(she moves deeper into the restaraunt, deftly navigating through the inky
blackness with the familiarity of someone who knows their home well.)

(Silently, something moves behind her...following...)

Ukyou (reaching the second light switch, about to flip it on): AH! Here we
are!

(The Something touches her on the back of her neck. Something cold,
wet...Ukyou screams...)

(The Tendo's, the living room)

(Genma and Soun are playing shoji again and trying to trick each other
as usual. Nodoka is sitting on the couch and looking a bit ill
(pregnancy is *NOT* fun for some women..sometimes it carries from kid to
kid on severity). Kasumi is prancing about the place with excitment over
her engagement cleaning and tidying as usual. Nabiki is lounging on a
mat reading.)

Soun (looking off for a second, but not so long as to allow Genma to switch
pieces): Ah, Saotome-kun. A beautiful night, yes? (smiles
wistfully)

Genma (nodding, but his brow is knotted with concentration...cheating was
harder with Nodoka around): Hai, Tendo-kun. (looking up and out the
door) An ever changing world...

Soun (nodding): An ever changing world....

(Then the screaming started)

(Nekohatten)

(We see Mousse with his arm around Shampoo's shoulders, talking,
chatting, smiling her tears away. She's slowly responding as they
converse, slowly losing her depression)

Mousse (chuckling): Or how about the time that we burned up Cabinet's
weapon when we were young, eh? Cologne beat us pretty well that
time...poor Cabinet. After all the time, she put into that sword's
hilt...carving it. (chuckling and shaking his head) Or how about when
we had to kill that Okinamiyaki critter that hunted you? Or when we
tricked the old..

Shampoo (interrupting): Shh...Great grandmother might be listening!

Mousse (looking about wearily...then turns it into a comical
expression): OH NO! The Revenge of the Evil Ghouls!

Shampoo (laughing): Be nice to Great Grandmother...

Mousse (chuckling): Hai...Hai...Nyah!

Shampoo (giggling): Nyah! back at Mousse!

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou screams. She flips on the light and jumps around, her back to the
wall. She swings around her battle spatula and prepares to kill
whatever touched her...and sees....)

Tsubasa (smiling and holding a puppy): UKYOU! *SURPRISE!* (the puppy
starts panting and licking its cold, wet nose).

(The Tendo's)

(Genma and Soun freeze as the screaming starts. Nabiki and Kasumi's eyes
open wide. Nodoka looks even more ill from the shock of the scream. They
all remain frozen and in place shocked...Who could be screaming? Why?
The screaming shifts in tone...it's like an animal screaming in pain, but
using human vocal cords.)

Akane (bolts into the living room): WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! JUST
SITTING THERE????? COME ON!

Genma and Soun (nodding to each other): Right.

Genma (to Kasumi): Take Nodoka up stairs and lock the door. Take
good care of her, Kasumi.

Kasumi (nodding): Hai! (going to Nodoka who looks incredibly ill)
Nodoka-san, let me help you. (she leads the trembling Nodoka up the stairs).

Soun (to Nabiki): Come with us. (to Akane) Take Nabiki with you, we'll
search outside in pairs. (grabbing a flash light)

Akane (nodding): Hai, come on, oneechan. (grabs her sister's hand)

(The two of them go left, towards the front of the house, while Genma and
Soun go the other direction searching...the screaming begins to lessen...
fading away...like a bad nightware that one claws awake from).

(cut to Ranma)

Ranma (thinking aloud): Great...I'm stuck...up here, alone...and
someone's screaming outside...or was. I can't hear it now. (He sighs and
scoots over to the hot water tap...)

(cut to the Nekohatten)

(Shampoo and Mousse are laughing now. They are obviously enjoying each
others' company. They have talked of other times and of the present.
Ranma's crazy adventures that always seem to pull them in too. Of
watermelon races and sharks, of love ramen and more...something has
changed in how Mousse holds Shampoo, and subconsciously, Shampoo seems
to accept it...)

(cut to the Tendo's)

(The screaming stopped -suddenly- with a burbbling gagging sound)

(cut to Ucchan's)

Tsubasa (dressed as a girl, holding out the puppy, voice hopeful): Will
you date with me?

Ukyou (furious): TSUBASA! HOW DARE YOU ENTER MY HOUSE! TSUBASA
NO BAKA! (She adeptly hurtles Tsubasa sans puppy out the
window...flinching as she realizes the cost of repairing it as he crashes
through. She eyes the puppy suspiciously at first and then picks it up
and cuddles with it. She wanders about holding and cuddling with it as
she pounders the night as happened. She wonders and sighs of what is to
become of her, of what is to come. Will Ranchan be hers or will he be
Acchan's? She holds the puppy close and cuddles with it. With a shake
she clears her mind; no use dwelling on things that are uncontrollable.
In an effort to think of something, anything, different she screws up her
face into a scowl. Startled yet again by a playful lick by the puppy,
she ponders it.)

Ukyou (thoughtful): What to name you....hmmmm

(cut to the Tendo's; outside)

(returning to the garden)

Akane (to Nabiki): I don't see anything. I'll look a little this
way. (Nabiki looks distressed for a second. She's no coward, but she's
no martial artist either. Akane sees this and smiles) No need to
worry...just a little this way. You check that way a bit.

Nabiki (nodding): Hai...

(cut to Genma and Soun, they're checking the alley. Nothing seems amiss.)

Genma (to Soun): Nothing here.

Soun (back): Nope.

(cut to Kasumi and Nodoka, they're upstairs and are in a room. Kasumi is
holding a bag which Nodoka is vomiting into).

Kasumi (shaking her head): Now, it'll be okay, Nodoka-san...just
normal side effects (she murmurs softly to Nodoka).

(cut to Ranma)

(He looks up. He sees a shadow on the other side of the screens in the
bathroom.)

Ranma (calling out): Acchan?

(cut to Nekohatten)

(Shampo and Mousse are looking at each other...looking at each other as
though they haven't known each other at all. Their eyes hold caring.)

Cologne (interrupting): <ENOUGH!> (furious) <YOU ARE ENGAGED BY OUR LAW
AND RITE, SHAMPOO! YOU. SHALL. NOT. BREAK. THEM!>

Mousse (standing, defiant): <No. She's mine, mummified fiend!>

Shampoo (lowering her head): <Yes, Great Grandmother, you right> (she
gets up and leaves, going to the kitchen)

Cologne (smiling in triumph): <Is she now, Mousse? Is she?> (She
cackles as she hops away)

Mousse (wounded beyond words): ...

(cut to the Tendo's)

Nabiki (moving towards the pond): Akane! I see something! It's on
top of the small stone house by the pond!

Akane (coming over): What is it, oneechan?

(cut to Soun and Genma)

(They are entering the front gate of the residence after circling the
building.)

Genma (shaking his heaad): That was strange...

Soun (chuckling): No worse than most things that have happened
since you came here...

Genma (grunting): ...

(Another scream pierced the night.)

(cut to Ucchan's)

(Ukyou is cuddling her new pet).

Ukyou (cooing): Hmmm...What to name you? Can't name you P-chan. That's
Akane's pet. Can't name you Ranchan...that name's reserved.
Hmmm...we're gonna have to keep ya secreted away too...can't have the health
inspectors seeing you, can we? Hmmm....(she moves upstairs, cuddling the
kawaii little mutt.) Well, Tsu-chan you are...since I'd never call him that!

(cut to the Tendo's)

(To Ranma)

(The screen door slides open and...the lights go out in the bathroom)

(To Nabiki & Akane)

(Nabiki is standing there screaming at the top of her lungs. There, not the
little stone house, was Kodachi head, severed at the neck. Her eyes,
missing. Her face in a mask of horror and terror. The back of head
smashed in, but not oozing at all. Her ribbon fluttering from where it
had been wrapped 'round the stone mound...)

(to Ranma)

(He's pushed himself as far from the screen as he can get inside the
tub. He hears the wheel chair be pushed out of the way. Whatever it is
coming towards him is far from friendly. He can feel *IT*. He prepares
himself as best he can...his battle aura begins to glow and...the lights
come on)

(to Genma and Soun)

(The two fathers have sprinted over to where Nabiki and Akane are.
Akane has turned Nabiki away from it but can't get her to stop
screaming. She shakes her...and just as her father and Uncle Saotome
arrive, she slaps her. Nabiki breaks down into a heap and cries. Akane
picks her up and holds her tight.)

Soun (to Akane): WHY DID YOU SLAP YOUR SISTER!

Akane (shaken herself, nods to the stone house atop the mound):
Look there.

Genma & Soun (gasp): ....

(to Kasumi & Nodoka)

(Nodoka has just finished vomiting again; Kasumi is tending her needs.
Suddenly a sweat breaks out on Kasumi's forehead. A sharp metallic taste
infests her mouth. She feels terror...for no reason she can see.)

Kasumi (grabbing Nodoka's arm): Come! Quick! NOW!

Nodoka (stumbling as she's dragged by Kasumi and wiping at her mouth) huh?

(Ranma, simultaneously)

(He blinks through the brightness to see a woman...a shapely woman,
standing before him. It's....)

Ranma (confused and a little worried): Kodachi?

Kodachi (laughing, nude, carrying only her ribbon): HAHAHAHAHAHA! My
Ranma-sama! I'm HERE FOR YOU!

(cut to Akane & crew)

Soun (shocked to his core): It's...

Genma (equally shocked): the crazy...(gulping)

Soun/Genma (starting to get ill): woman of Ranma's...

Akane (nodding): Head.

(cut to Ranma)

Ranma (looking warily at her, but not as worried...or starts to not be as
worried, but something about her DOES worry him...how'd she get in
here?): Kodachi? How did you get in here?

Kodachi (smiling insanely as ever): Does it matter, my Ranma-sama,
I'm here for you! I've (her voice begins changing, growing harsher) come
(and harsher) to (almost a snarl) get (IS a snarl) you...(She launches
herself at Ranma)

(Ranma shouts and chi-blasts her back through the screen. She stands up
and walks back)

(cut to Kasumi)

(Kasumi drags Nodoka out into the hall and down the stairs.)

(cut to Ranma)

Kodachi (walks forward...unharmed. Not harmed in the least. She smiles
at Ranma in a twisted insane version of love.): Don't you want me, my love?

Ranma (eyes wide and terrified, voice steady though): No.

Kodachi (smiling still, but it slips to something that's a perverse twist
on the typically manaical Kodachi's grin): Good.

(cut to Akane & crew)

(They turn their heads and see, through a window, Kasumi and Nodaka
running down the stairs and outside through the door. The group moves to
them with concern. The movement distracts them from the macabre sight
they had just witnessed: Kodachi's severed head.)

(cut to Ranma)

(He chi-blasts her again. and again. Yet she stands unharmed, unmoving.
Laughing, insanely)

Ranma (screaming it): DAMN YOU!!!!!!!

Kodachi (smiling twistedly): No. I'm here to damn you, Ranma-sama.
(Her face splits and quivers. The shimmering, pulsing ooze between the two
halves of her face ripple and shift to form another face....something
hideous...yet still a face...emerges)

(cut to Akane & crew)

Akane (voice shaky, but not stirred): Ranm-? (she gets cut off)

(cut to Ranma)

Kodachi-thing (laughing evilly): Summoned, I was. Summoned I am.
My destinity is set. My path to be cut. My fate is bound with yours.
When the Saotome thread is cut and the tapestry burned, I may sleep.

Ranma (unsure of it's words, but sure of it's evil, he picturing this thing
attacking Ucchan and Acchan screams murder and stands, in incredible
pain): HIRYU SHOTEN HA!!!!!!!! (a chi Dragon arcs out from Ranma and
engulfs the hell-thing)

(cut to Kasumi)

(She races, almost dragging the still ill Nodoka out the front door as
the upper floor of the Tendo Residency explodes...)

(end part 5)

Will Baird InterNet: wba...@nmsu.edu chpw...@arriba.nm.org
#include disclaimer.h Web Page: http://essex.nmsu.edu/~scomputi/
Creator of the KU, "After All This Time", Jordanite, Ranma 1/2 Addict, & More
"The Creator made women to please the eye and trouble the mind" -RJ, tFoH

Alright. Having gotte feedback on the other ones, here goes the latest
of Ranma 1/2: ....After All This Time?!.

All questions, comments, flames to wba...@nmsu.edu.

All Rights Reserved by Rumiko Takashi and her (un)holy minions.

*******************************************
****Ranma 1/2:....After All This Time?!****
*******************************************

Episode 6: "Here Comes the Rain Again"

(Nekohatten)

(We see Mousse standing staring at the door where Cologne has just
vacated. Anger is rising within him. A boiling, senseless hatred of the
unholy, evil little pogo'ing mummy.)

Mousse (shouting): I! WILL! KILL! YOU! YOU WILL NOT TAKE MY SHAMPOO FROM
ME!

(He rushes out the door of Shampoo's room to find the ancient troll...
unfortunately for him in his fury he had pushed up his glasses.)

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou has place the puppy down and is now pacing. She's quite visibly
upset. Something is nagging her quite badly. She's, out of character
for her angst in progress, whistling a happy tune. Equally obvious is
that she's worked her self up into a frenzy and has been at this for a
while now.)

Ukyou (alternatingly mumbling and whistling): It's (whistle a few notes) not
(whistle a few more) NATURAL!!! (She stops and screams pulling at her
hair. She looks upwards.) WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME?! AFTER ALL THIS
TIME???? WHY?????????

(She begins ripping and smashing things with her spatula. Tsu-chan looks
terrified and scootles over to the spread newspapers and does his thing
(You learn *QUICKLY* in a martial artist's household to use the
newspapers when yer a mutt!). Ukyou shreds her bed with methodical
mania, cutting and smashing things...finally she stops. Feathers and
bits of stuffing are everywhere, covering everything. She stops only
because Tsu-chan started barking at her, breaking the spell. She begins
crying and scoops up Tsu-chan, curling into a ball on the severly
mutilated bed, pouring out tears.)

Ukyou (sobbing): Ranchan...help me...(her voice gets slightly
huskier, lower, for a moment) Acchan...(she dissolves into a flood of tears)

(Tendo's)

(The walls of the upper floor explode outwards. The roof shudders, and
shudders again. One of the supports crumbles and the whole roof
collapses on the upper floor, but amazingly (or as Nabiki notes, her
improvements to the household since Ranma and Akane started to trash it
have helped) next floor doesn't.)

Akane (in shock, as the explosion fades): RANMA?!!

(She gets up and runs to the house. Genma and Soun tackle her.)

Genma (trying with all his might to hold the young woman to the ground):
Akane, you can't go in there!

Soun(struggling just as much): Listen to Saotome-kun, daughter!
PLEASE! (nearly lapsing into a bawling fit, pulls himself out as Akane
nearly pulls herself free)

Akane (struggling hard to get to her Ranchan, wailing): HE'S IN THERE!

(Nekohatten)

(Mousse rushes out into the corridor and down the hall. He looks for
Cologne, but cannot find her. He rushes out in the resteraunt thinking
to find her there, since she wasn't in the kitchen. Seeing the Ghoul
flee out the front door, he charges out in pursuit.)

Mousse (in rage): DIE, MUMMY! (hooked chains and many, many
weapons fly from under his sleaves as he races out the door in pursuit)
FLEE WHILE YOU CAN, MUMMY! (voice fading with distance) I SHALL VANQUISH
YOU!

Cologne (turning to a sad looking Shampoo who is carrying out a platter
with bowls of ramen on it): <What was that about?>

Shampoo (shrugging and looking a bit perplexed): <Shampoo not
know, ask blind Mousse!> (She turns and serves her customers.)

(Cologne shrugs. Normally he calls her something along those lines,
but...perhaps he ought to check whether he's really chasing her. Oh
well, no loss...)

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou has fallen asleep, face still wet from her tears. Tsu-chan has
wiggled loose and attacks a pillow. Ukyou doesn't notice, her exhaustion
all encompassing. Tsu-chan finally tires of his game and looks around,
unsure what to do. His eyes reach Ukyou and he barks startling Ukyou
awake. He barks more. Ukyou pats him on his head and curls up once more
and sleeps. Tsu-chan can' stand that and pounces on her, grabbing her hair.)

Ukyou (grunting): TSU-CHAN! You naughty puppy! STOP! (she
reaches for him, but he's out of reach. She scoots towards him, but
Tsu-chan isn't a stupid mutt and scoots back as well. She finally grabs
him and gets her hair back, covered in dog slobber). You naughty,
naughty boy! (Tsu-chan leaps from her grasp and darts to the other side
of the bed . He barks at her. She looks at him exasperated and dives
for him, faking going one way, but actually going another, scooping him up.)
Tsu-chan no baka! (She twaps his head and Tsu-chan nips her finger. She
yelps and drops him. He, despite his small size, tackles her. They
wrestle in fun, worries forgotten for a time.)

(Tendo's)

(The two men continue to struggle with Akane. Nodaka has joined the crew
and still looks ill. Kasumi is not with her though. Nabiki, who has
recovered, points to where Kodachi's eyeless, brainless, unoozing head
is...but...)

Nabiki (gasping): Guys...

(Akane, still struggling against genma and Soun)

Nodaka (looking at Nabiki strangely): What am I supposed to see?
There's not a thing on the stone house...let alone a ribbon at the mound's
base...

(Then the sirens ring out, the police, fire department, and the like are
on their way. Kasumi seems to have kept her head yet again. A soft maniacal
laughter floats down just then, barely audible to the crew...Kodachi's laugh.
Fading away.)

(To Mousse)

(He's wandering about, wondering where the Ghoul ditched him. He's part
way to the Tendo's, he thinks, but he's a bit disoriented.)

Mousse (anger having died down, muttering): Where are you, you old
hunk of mule haunch? You can't have lost me that easily...

A voice (slightly insane, yet grandoise): Hello, Mousse...

Mousse (who can't quite make out who it is for some reason): Hello?

Voice (feminine, sultry, seductive): How would you like to play with me?

Mousse (a little confused): Huh? (pushes down his glasses)

(A ribbon lashes out and wraps around his leg yanking him off his feet
before he has a chance to react.)

Kodachi (smiling evilly, seductively): Come here, big boy...

(Tendo's)

(The emergency crew have arrived and are in the process of searching the
house, looking for Ranma. The Tendo's attempt to explain what had happened.
The Police are a bit incredulous. A head? With no blood?)

Inspector (talking to Nabiki, Soun and Genma are holding down Akane still
while the rescuers are searching the house): Now, you say that there
was a head over on the stone house there on the mound, there, right, Ms
Tendo?

Nabiki (nodding): Hai! Look, inspector, may I call you Leon? You
can get other people to be witnesses to the screaming to corroborrate
that part of our story. Something obviously strange has happened here,
ne?

Inspector (nodding): Hai! Something has, but based on what the
neighbours say something strange happens here *regularly*, Ms Tendo.
Most have added sound proofing to their homes! We ought to know! We
heard from them enough...

(Interrupting, a rescue worker has made his way down and upside, he's
carrying a body. Ranma's.)

Rescuer (panting, Ranma is a bit heavier than he looks): Found him
upstairs alright. He just appears to be tired. He was holding up part
of the roof. Took a bit of doing but we got him out...This kid is *STRONG*.

(Akane, having an incredible case of hyperhysterical strength, she throws
off the older men and rushes up to the rescuer to take Ranma).

Rescuer (trying to prevent Akane from taking Ranma): Miss, he's a bit
heavy...

Akane (determined): I know. Give him to me.

Rescuer (frustrated): Miss...

Akane (growling): Now.

Rescuer (even more frustrated): I...

(The arrival of Ryouga on the scene distracts the inspector long enough
from the Rescuer. Seeing this, Akane rushes past the rescuer and turns
quickly malleting him with her Extra Dimensional Mallet and scoops up
Ranma before he hits the ground.)

Akane (taking Ranma to the ambulance, softly speaking): Ranchan, here we
go again...(climbs into the ambulance and it tears off, sirens blaring)

(Mousse, somewhere between the Nekohatten and the Tendo's, or so he thinks)

(Mousse quickly produced a blade from his robes and cut the ribbon
wrapped around his leg. Kodachi lashes out with a club that sprouts more
spikes than on a porcupine, throwing it. Mousse blocks it with his
robes, but doesn't see it fall to the ground. A slight tug of weight
yanks on his robes and a burning smell reaches his nostrils. He dances
away from Kodachi who is maniacally laughing yet again. The club...was
eating through his robes...it was changing...into a blob. Kodachi
laughs on.)

(Nekohatten)

(Shampoo is down stairs in the resteraunt. She's pacing. Mousse ran off
a while ago. No sign of where he has been...for a while now too. She is
quite obviously worried.)

Shampoo (muttering to herself): Where stupid Mousse? Shampoo wor-(she
crushes that thought. Her grandmother was right. Shampoo was Ranma's.
Unless Mousse defeated her...now there was a thought! But...but....but.....
She couldn't live with herself if she didn't fight to her fullest all the
time. Oh the Dilemna!)

(She paced more. But Mousse did not come.)

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou has begun cleaning up her place. Tsu-chan is barking and tugging
at her feet. She's more annoyed than amused. She looks tired and
bedraggled. Very bedraggled. Worry weighs heavy upon her.)

Ukyou (stopping and sighing; she looks down at her mutt): What should I
do, Tsu-chan?

(Tsu-chan mimicing her cocks his head and whimpers.)

Ukyou (exhausted to the point of where she's actually thinking Tsu-chan
understands her and is replying to her): Should I tell Ranchan
and Acchan what I feel?

(Tsu-chan scoots away and whimpers again)

Ukyou (nodding and sighing): True...this is very true...you're right
Tsu-chan. That would be stupider than Konou.

(Tsu-chan wags his tail)

Ukyou (smiling at the mutt): Okay. I won't say a thing.

(Tsu-chan growls throatily and backs away from Ukyou.)

Ukyou (perplexed): Or should I tell them, Tsu-chan?

(Tsu-chan stops in the corner and starts barking.)

Ukyou (feeling something is wrong, turns around): What? What is it,
Tsu-chan? A burglar? (She looks up and sees a large, but not huge moth
in the window fluttering around harmlessly.) Silly dog. (She grabs a
jar and captures it and takes it outside.)

(Ukyou comes inside and then goes down stairs. Tsu-chan happily,
innocently follows after yapping, but not loudly. Ukyou swats him
affectionately and moves on. She makes it to the kitchen - to fix
herself a snack before bed - and Tsu-chan bites her heel.)

Ukyou (yelping): TSU-CHAN! (rounding on the puppy) You little
monster! (She scoops him up and is about to aim for the stairs up when
the phone rings and she gets this horrible sense of deja vu.)

(At the Hospital)

(We see Akane at the phone. She's looking around and frustrated. People
bustle and swirl about her. Ranma is nowhere in sight.)

Akane (muttering under her breath): Ucchan....get the phone, damnit.
Ranchan needs us again.

(Ucchan's)

(Ukyou is sitting there, staring at the phone. Too terrified to pick it
up. She is scared. No, terrified. Terrified that Ranchan might be hurt
again...or Acchan. Tears form. She sits there unable to move. Staring
at the ringing telephone. Unsure, alone, and terrified.)

(Akane; at the hospital)

Akane (furious and shouting): DAMNIT, UCCHAN! PICK UP THE PHONE! I
KNOW YOU'RE HOME, PICK IT UP! PICK IT UP! (She's starting to crack
too. People stare at her strangely and step widely around her). Ranchan
needs you...

(Ucchan's)

(Tsu-chan barks snapping Ukyou out of her spell. She reaches for the
phone. Tears leaking).

Ukyou (terrified and crying): Ucchan's...Acchan? (She brightens
considerably. Her mood crashes harder than an unrecoverable disk) RANCHAN!

(Mousse)

(Mousse rid himself of the part of the robe that was being eaten away.
Lucky carrying so many hidden weapons that you just happen to have a
dagger in there. He sprouts blades from the remainders of his sleeves
and dances close to Kodachi. She jumps back and away. Anticipating
this, Mousse too jumps and slices; removing her head, butchering her
torso, and ravishing her arms. She falls to the ground in pieces. An
arm in one direction, a bit of torso here, a bit of brain there.)

Mousse (landing lightly and avoiding the bits of the dead woman): Whew!
If she's that easy to beat, why does Ranma have such a hard time?!
Hmph. Shows he's a whimp and no proper suiter for Shampoo it does!
He...(Mousse trails off as the bits of Kodachi melt and slime together;
reforming into a mass of ooze. Mousse dances away, but can't get his
eyes off the slime; it is horrible, yet fascinating to watch. No wonder
Ranma had such a hard time! SHE'S POSSESSED!)

(Kodachi reimerges from the slime, whole once more.)

Kodachi (laughing manaically): HOHOHOHO! You think I'm that easy to
beat? (thinking of the blades) I do like how your fow^Hul mind works
though. (laughing again) I absorbed this one and I'll absorb you too,
Mousse! (voice husky, alluring again) Then I'll take your Shampoo,
Mousse. How would you like that? (Carressing her own body; almost
fondling herself from the inside) How would you like that, Mousse. I
am going to take her like you never will-AND AS A WOMAN!

Mousse (lashing out with hooked and bladed chains): DIE!!!!!!!!!!!

(Kodachi laughs as the chains hit her body. Then something happened.
Kodachi's body rippled and suckled at the chains hungrily, pulling them
into herself.)

Mousse (trying to back away): What *ARE* you? (He backs away until the
chains are taut and can't get any further.)

Kodachi (smiling so incongruently innocently that it comes across
horribly): Your fondest dream...(Her body ripples and changes, the body,
nude, of Shampoo emerges from teh sliming bipedal mass) Nihao, Mousse.
(bursting into flame) We have hot time tonight? (The chains are sucked
into Shampoo's body and a rapidly increasing rate, Mousse kicking and
screaming tries to pull away but can't.)

Shampoo (arms wide in a waiting welcoming embrace, her smooth unblemished
skin unharmed in the midst of a roaring inferno): Come to Shampoo,
Mousse! Be Shampoo'ed!

(Ucchan's)

Ukyou (slamming down the reciever): SHIT! RANCHAN! (She runs up
stairs, scooping the puppy up and drops him into her bedroom. She grabs
some fresh clothing and chanegs while running down and out the door. She
starts running towards the hospital when sees a flame off to her right
and hears screaming. A man screaming.)

(Bouncing around to the roof top above, she looks down to see what is
up. She sees Mousse and his chains connected to a flaming and nude
Shampoo??? And he's trying to get away? Something was wrong she could
tell that: Shampoo was there with open arms for Mousse! Thinking
quickly, Ukyou decided that she'd need to act quickly if she was going to
do something; Mousse was almost drawn to Shampoo, just outside of the
reach of the flames.)

Ukyou (nodding): Right. Once again to the breach...Here I come,
Shampoo. (She jumps off the roof, wielding her spatula and slammed it
down on Mousses chains, breaking them [invoking anime physics here!])

(Mousse and Shampoo fly in opposite directions. Ukyou and Shampoo
recover first. Ukyou rounds on Shampoo and hefts her battle-Spat.
Shampoo merely smiles and reignites the flames. Mousse crumples against
the wall he hit, unconscious.)

Shampoo (stroking herself for Ukyou's benefit.): Here, Ukyou. I
know what you want (she strokes herself between her tighs).

(Ukyou is shocked at first and stumbles back. Shampoo merely walks
slowly to her.)

Shampoo (alluring, sexy, a 'gotta have it'): I know you need a woman,
Ukyou...come to me.....

(Ukyou gulps and backs away. She whimpers.)

Ukyou (whimpering that builds to a scream): You...you can't Know THAT
ABOUT *ME*

Shampoo (letting the flames go out; carressing herself): I do know
it, Ukyou, and I know what you want from a woman...

(Shampoo stands in front of Ukyou; she cocks her head and closes her
eyes in readiness for a kiss. Ukyou is unsure of what to do. Then she
remembered Ranchan and Acchan.....AND MOUSSE! She whirls around the
battle-spat.)

Shampoo (opening her eyes): Huh?

(Battle-spat moving at hypersonic velocities connects with Shampoo's
body. What is the resulting velocity of the conserved system immediately
after the collision?)

(Shampoo slams against the far wall and dribbles down it as a bloody
pulp. Yet she stands, a macabre sight, and smiles at Ukyou.)

Ukyou (hefting her spatula in a vicious gesture): BACK OFF, BITCH!

(Shampoo smiles again and shimmers.)

Shampoo-thing (voice kodachi's though): HOHOHOHOHO! You have one this
round, Ukyou. I'll try for you again, fear not! (It brightens in a
horrible, bright, blinding light!)

(Ukyou covers her eyes with her hand to shade it)

Voice from within the Light (laughing, mocking, and androgynous):
Fear not, my pretties! I'll come for you! I'll come for you!
Especially for my Ranma-chan! (evil laughter) Oh my darlings!

(A bright flash)

(A wall of air)

(Ukyou flattened to the ground)

Ukyou (getting up and dusting herself off): What do I do now?
(turning and seeing Mousse) MOUSSE! (She rushes over to him, checks him
out, finding a few cuts and scrapes. She realizes something. How did it
know? NO ONE DID!)

(end episode 6)

Thanx guys for the feedback so far. This is all preplanned. All
intended. Comments welcomed and appreciated.

Will

Will Baird InterNet: wba...@nmsu.edu chpw...@arriba.nm.org
#include disclaimer.h Web Page: http://essex.nmsu.edu/~scomputi/
Creator of the KU, "After All This Time", Jordanite, Ranma 1/2 Addict, & More
"The Creator made women to please the eye and trouble the mind" -RJ, tFoH