[Ranma][Fanfic] Iris: China Roses

[Nicholas Leifker]

I'm dying.

I wasn't expecting that.

Another sign of my arrogance, I guess - something that this earth
takes delight in belittling. Life gave me wisdom, wisdom gave me
life, both gave me arrogance, fate smashed my arrogance. I've lived
a long time, long enough to get a heaping teaspoon of all of it.

My stomach burns, but I ignore it. It's been two days since I last
tried to eat something; I barely kept the pudding down, then. I
doubt I could keep anything down now. My body is beyond repair; time
has cast its wicked spell on me for over a century, and it has
finally gotten past my defenses.

My last lead turned dry two weeks ago; it was a longshot, but
longshots were all I had left. There is literally no reason for me
to stay on this plane of existence; there hasn't been for the past
five years. My usefulness ended then, as did any hope that I could
find peace in this or the next life. All I've been doing since then
is grasping at straws, trying to find *something* which could undo
what I've done, the damage I've caused.

My heirs must despise me now. I trained them, focused their minds,
prepared them for their futures... then destroyed those futures in
one foolish act. No doubt my name is a black mark on my home. Oh,
how they must hate the thought of my continued existence - indeed, I
hate with them. I deserve every ounce of their hatred.

There isn't much left for me to do. I must go... to make amends to
my greatest heir, the one I ripped asunder in my greed. She deserves
that much; she deserves to know why I did it, how it happened that
night.

That is why I have returned after so long. I will die in this land,
but I will not die before telling Ranma the truth.

This I swear, with what little life I have left in me.

*********************************************

Leifker presents...

China Roses

A work of anime fanfiction by Nicholas Leifker

All Ranma 1/2 characters created by Rumiko Takahashi. All others (if
there are any) created by Nicholas Leifker. All rights reserved.

Who can tell me if we have heaven?

*********************************************

Weddings were absolutely ridiculous, Ranma thought quietly to
herself. There was so much that had to be done before the actual
ceremony: invitations, flowers, catering, cake, site, tuxedoes,
dresses, showers... presumably, if the bride and groom could get
through the hell of preparation, then there was nothing in the
marriage that could tear them apart. It certainly felt that way
during the preparations for her and Akane's wedding, and it was most
definitely that way for Akane and Ryouga's.

Smiling privately, she crossed her arms and legs and watched the show
in front of her. Kasumi and Nabiki were trying on possible
bridesmaid's dresses. Both were not happy with Akane's first choice;
Kasumi didn't like hot pink, and Nabiki just didn't like pink. The
second one was equally comical, and had both women holding a hand
over their exposed cleavages. Akane started looking through the
designs available, an angry gleam to her eye. Ranma knew she had to
be stopped - for fashion's sake, at least.

"Akane, may I make a recommendation?" Ranma asked, almost as a
whisper.

"What?" Akane growled.

Ranma looked out the window, to confirm where she was. "Kasumi,
Nabiki, look through the outfits. If you find one that both of you
agree on, hold onto it. Akane, come with me." She grabbed the
bride-to-be with a rough grip, and dragged her out of the boutique.

"Ranma!" Akane whined. "What's the matter with you?"

She smiled. "You want some ice cream? My treat."

Akane looked at her as though she'd grown a second head. "Ice cream?
I'm worried about my wedding, and all you can think about is food?"

Ranma gave Akane an even stare. "No, Akane. What I am thinking
about is my closest friend stressing herself out over something which
will go well regardless of what the dresses are like." She gestured
to the ice cream parlor. "Now, are you going to have some ice cream,
or do I have to drag you in by the hair?"

Akane grumbled. "You know, I think I liked you better when you just
called me uncute."

The redhead couldn't help but smile. "Well, you're that too, but
we'll not go into that."

"Baka." Akane playfully slugged Ranma in the shoulder, and followed
her into the parlor. They walked up to a booth, and waited for a
waitress to come by.

Akane was holding her forehead. "I'm sorry, Ranma. It's just that I
want everything to go perfect for this wedding."

"I know." Ranma looked over the various parfaits offered.
"Unfortunately, there's only so much you can do. Heck, look at what
happened with our wedding. We had everything planned perfectly...
and it still didn't go off." She pointed to a peanut-butter
confection on the menu. "Does this look good, Akane?"

"Uh-huh," Akane droned. Ranma looked over, and stared at her. She
seemed to be lost in her own world.

"Akane? Are you okay?"

Akane snapped out of her trance. "Huh? Uh... sure, Ranma. I was
just thinking about something."

Ranma folded her arms. "What?"

"Well... I was just thinking about what it was like then. God, we
were so innocent. We thought that, after everything that had
happened, that..." Akane trailed off. "Sorry."

"Akane..." Ranma sighed. "Will you get off of the guilt trip? We've
both beaten ourselves up enough over it."

Akane looked downward for a moment. "Sorry, Ranma. It's just that I
don't know what you're feeling through all of this. I thought this
would be hard on you, but..."

Ranma smiled - a hard smile, with none of the cockiness or mischief
that was her wont. "It's okay about ninety percent of the time.
Then, we're good friends, sisters... then, I'm happy for you. The
other ten percent... I see you as my ex-fiancee, the woman whose life
I saved time and again, the woman to whom I gave my heart... and lost
it."

Akane was nearly in tears. "Ranma, I-"

"Don't say it." Ranma held her fingertips over Akane's lips. "We've
all been so sorry over it that I'm tired of being sorry." The
mischievous smile returned. "Besides, it's not like I'm lonely
anymore."

An eyebrow arched on Akane's forehead. "How are you and Kunou doing,
anyway?"

Ranma shrugged. "We're fine. I... I feel comfortable around him."
She laughed. "I still can't quite call him 'Tatewaki', though. I
guess he'll always be Kunou to me."

Akane smiled. "That'll change." She glanced out the window for a
moment. "It took a year for Ryouga to stop calling me 'Akane-san',
but he has done it."

The dark-haired woman looked away. "Ranma, I am kind of worried
about you and Kunou. There's... it's not something that can really
be described. I just... I guess I'm wondering if you're really ready
for a relationship like this."

Ranma stared at her for a moment, and slowly rubbed her wrists. She
honestly wasn't sure how to answer Akane's question. "Akane... I
don't know, either. Whenever either of us are... uncomfortable with
something, we stop and talk about it. There are times when I'm
still uncomfortable with even a kiss." Her gaze lowered. "There
are other times, though, when... when I want every part of him."

Akane's eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets. "You don't mean..."

"Well, I've had ten months to think about it. I mean... if I do want
the relationship to progress to its logical conclusion, then...
then... then I will have to give myself to him. It's not something
I'm ready for yet... but I'm trying to get there." Ranma raised an
eyebrow Akane's way. "Does that surprise you?"

"Well... yes." Akane shrugged. "When we talked about doing it with
each other when you were... I mean... you were adamant about not
doing it in cursed form." She shook her head. "You've come a long
way, Ranma - more than I ever expected."

"Thanks, Akane." She tilted her head toward the window, and pointed
a manicured thumb toward the exit. "You want to elope with me? I
know a great priest who'd be willing to do it..."

Akane giggled. "Only if we don't have any bridesmaid's dresses to
worry about."

Ranma's facade broke, and she joined in Akane's chorus of laughter.

*********************************************

Ono Tofu sat at his desk, leafing through the day's paperwork. This
was the part of his job that he hated; it felt so useless to chain
himself to a desk so that every minutiae of detail could be
catalogued for posterity, while people scant miles away needed a
healer's touch to survive. He knew, of course, that such things were
necessary; however, that didn't make him feel any better.

Sighing, looking for something to take him away from the work, he
turned his head toward the window. It was a nice day out; Kasumi and
the others would definitely have an enjoyable time shopping. He
quietly wished he were with them, even if it meant holding Kasumi's
purse while she tried something on.

Unfortunately, business called. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, he
turned his head from the paperwork and focused on the mail. There
was a letter from an old colleague of his from school, something he
didn't get very often anymore. He picked up the letter, opened it
quickly, and started reading.

He looked the passages over again, then looked at the photograph.

He blinked.

In a second, he rushed to the phone. There was a chance that they
had finished their shopping trip already. He dearly hoped they had;
this was something that was best settled quickly. He dialed the
number, then waited for interminable seconds as the phone rang at the
other end.

"Hello?"

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Sir? It's Tofu."

Soun's calm voice echoed across the wires. "What is it, son? You
seem... troubled."

Tofu stopped for a moment, to try to find the right words. "Sir, I
need to speak to Ranma. Immediately."

"What's wrong?"

He glanced at the receiver. "I would prefer to discuss that with
Ranma privately before anyone else is told."

"As you wish." Soun's voice radiated annoyance. "I will tell her
once they get back."

"Okay. That'll give me time to figure out how to tell her."

A pause held on the other end. "Is it that serious?"

Tofu shook his head. "I... I don't know, sir. It's difficult to
tell anything right now. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay. I'll tell her you called."

Pleasantries were exchanged as they hung up the phone; Tofu's eyes
quickly turned to the photograph. It was certainly not a face he'd
expect to see again, not after all this time. It was not a pleasant
face; age had taken its toll, wrinkling the physiognomy almost beyond
any appreciable recognition. The body was frail, wasted; he could
see that the strength that once seemed boundless in the subject was
fading.

Closing his eyes, he put the photograph back with the letter, and
resumed his paperwork. Maybe he could think of something while he
was working...

*********************************************

"uh-huh... Really? Why?...Oh, my... Ranma might not take that very
well... Okay, dear, I'll tell them. I love you. Bye."

Kasumi hung up the phone, and turned back to her sisters. "Nabiki,
could you take Akane over to your apartment for awhile? Ranma and I
need to go to the clinic."

The redhead blinked. "What's wrong, Kasumi?"

She looked downward. "We'll talk about it at the clinic. I would
prefer that we discuss it in private."

"Is it that serious?" Akane asked.

Kasumi nodded. "Yes." She smiled, a practiced move to relax people.
"Don't worry. It's nothing dangerous. It might even be a good
thing." She held out a hand. "Come along, Ranma."

Kasumi began her walk toward home, making sure her kinswoman came
along behind her. The redhead's demeanor as the made their way gave
her pause; Ranma was walking slowly, as though she were wearing a
tight skirt, and her head was pointed downward, scarlet bangs
covering her eyes. Kasumi sighed, and turned around.

"Ranma, are you okay?"

Ranma continued to stare downward. "Tofu found something, didn't
he?" Her voice shook with something uncharacteristic of her: fear.

"Huh?" Kasumi turned back around, and put her hands on her hips.

Ranma rubbed her arms. She stared vacantly in front of her, her
steps mechanical. "I mean, what else could it be? He found
something from that examination he gave me last week, and... and
something's wrong with me."

Kasumi chuckled. "Ranma, there is nothing wrong with you. You are
the healthiest person I know." Her smile faded; her voice lowered to
a whisper. "However, Tofu did get some news today that may concern
your... second form."

Blue eyes widened to the size of quarters. "What? You mean... he
may have found a... a cure?"

She shook her head. "I don't think so. There is a possibility that
you might find one as a result of what happened... but I seriously
doubt it." A sigh escaped from her lips. "I don't know; it's all so
confusing."

Not much else was said on the way to the clinic. Kasumi occasionally
glanced Ranma's way; the redhead seemed lost in her own thoughts.
Ranma's soft-blue eyes darted about repeatedly, as though she were
watching something not there. Occasionally she smiled; Kasumi hoped
that, whatever she was dreaming, it would come true.

Heaven knew she deserved it.

*********************************************

The office had improved a great deal since Ranma first entered it
many years ago. Sterile white stucco was now decorated with
paintings of country scenes, antiques, and other trinkets inexpensive
enough for a clinic to afford. Pink curtains draped over the outside
windows, catching everyone's eye without assaulting it. Army-green
blankets were replaced with every soothing color under the rainbow,
and someone had painted the tiles on the floor in a pink - sky blue
checkerboard pattern.

Even she had to admit: the clinic was certainly much prettier with
Kasumi in the place.

It was a small comfort to her, though. She didn't know whether to
laugh, cry, or just scream. Something had come into her life -
something ranging between a cure and another curse - and only Kasumi
and Tofu knew what it was. Sighing, she walked over to Tofu's desk,
and sat down in front of it.

The doctor also looked much improved from his bachelor days. His
normal intensity was still there, but it was like it was relaxed,
somehow. There had always been a tension in him before Kasumi; love
and marriage had caused much of that tension to vanish. He smiled,
and held a candy jar out to her.

"Hello, Ranma." His grin twinkled in the fading sunlight. "Candy?"

"Thanks." She snatched the hard candy like a toddler, and quickly
began to savor it. Her eyes darted around the room - anything to get
her mind off of what was at hand. "So, Doc. What's up?"

Tofu's dark eyes pierced into her - something that happened only when
he was deadly serious. Her explorations of his office stopped.
"Ranma, I received a letter this morning from a colleague of mine.
It would seem that he has a patient that would like to see you."

Ranma's brow furrowed. "Huh? You and Kasumi get me all panicked,
all because someone wants a visitor?"

Tofu glanced uncertainly at Kasumi, then continued. "Ranma, this is
no ordinary patient. She... suffice it to say, she might have some
idea as to what happened on the night of your bachelor party."

Ranma's eyes widened. She nearly swallowed the candy in shock. "You
mean..."

Tofu pulled out a photograph from his pocket. "Yes, Ranma. We've
found Cologne."

Ranma stared at the photograph for a moment, not quite believing.
Part of her didn't want to see the wrinkled, emaciated body wasted
away in the bed... it gave her an uncomfortable feeling inside.
She'd never pictured someone so indomitable beaten by life like that
- even if it was by mortality's incessant call.

"How... how is she?"

Tofu shook his head - a gesture she knew too well. "Not good. Her
body's giving out; they don't expect her to last much longer."

Ranma swallowed the candy; it stretched her esophagus as it went
down. "Did it mention anything about..."

Again, Tofu shook his head. "That's something only she can answer...
that is, if you're going to visit her."

Ranma closed her eyes. She'd had dreams of a meeting like this -
dreams and nightmares. In many of them, too many for her to ever
trust the pillow again, she found the old ghoul laughing at her fate,
chuckles like shards of glass rubbing against her skin. At the same
time, she also thought that maybe - just maybe - the old ghoul might
have the secret to bring her old self back.

She thought of Kunou, and wondered if she should even try.

"Doc... where is she?"

Tofu pushed his glasses up on his face. "Tenth Street Hospital."
The glare of lights obscured his eyes. "Are you going?"

Ranma's throat stuck with old candy. "Y... Yes."

*********************************************

The surface of the pond rippled with the touches of raindrops, as a
downpour covered Nerima district in something once tragic. Leaves
drooped with heavy water; a strange energy seemed to fill the air,
the byproduct of lightning's ionization. Rain sparkled like diamonds
as it passed in front of the lighted dojo, the lonely shine of
fluorescent lamps the only regular illumination in the complex.

Kunou felt the young woman shiver in her arms. She never complained
about it, but he knew that cold affected her more than it did
himself. Smiling, he gripped the blankets tighter in his fists, and
closed his arms around her. She relaxed into his embrace, a faint
whisper of a smile on her lips.

He honestly didn't know what to say to her. He'd waited weeks for a
moment like this, when it was just the two of them, alone, quiet...
at peace. How many hours had he gone over this moment, wondering how
to make his case without driving her off? How many times had he
begun the speech, only to have someone interrupt them - or, worse,
for his own cowardice to betray him?

No more. He coughed once, hoping the words wouldn't sound too weak.

"Lovely night, isn't it?"

"Mmm." Ranma nodded. The smile faded; he wondered what he'd done
wrong. There was a hurting in her eyes, even more so than her usual.

"What's wrong, Ranma?"

The love of his life sighed. "Nothing's wrong, Kunou." Her eyes
looked melancholy as the pinpricks of light reflected in them,
creating a sea of stars. "Or maybe everything is. I wish I knew."

This was not something he'd expected. Concerns took front seat. His
dreams of the future had to come a close second. "What's happening?"

"Who says anything's happening?" Ranma scowled.

He shook his head. He knew her better than that. "Ranma..."

His 'redhaired goddess' shook her head - apparently in frustration.
"I... I don't want to talk about it right now, Kunou. I still don't
know what to make of it." She apparently saw his hurt expression;
she reached up, and kissed him gently on the cheek. "When I know
what's going on, I'll talk to you about it. Okay?"

"Okay." His resolve came back; it may not be the best of times, but
he had to bring it up. If he waited for everything to be perfect,
he'd never get a chance to talk about it.

"Ranma?"

"Yeah, Kunou?"

He closed his eyes for a moment. A million possible words came to
mind; it was a struggle to choose just a few. "Have you... have you
ever thought about starting a family?"

Relief at actually mentioning it died in her gaze. Her eyes
reflected a world's worth of frustration. "God, Kunou, your timing
needs a LOT of work."

The only thunder that spoke was the air's rumblings. So much hurt
welled up inside of him. He tried not to let it show; she could see
such things all too easily.

She shook her head, her eyes closed. "Sorry, Kunou. It's just
that... the past day has been absolutely crazy." She licked her lips
nervously. "Kunou..."

It hurt for him to swallow. His voice cracked like gravel beneath
his feet. "Yes?"

"Do you remember when I asked you if you could love a man?"

Kunou nearly collapsed from shock. After all this time.. after all
that had happened.. "You mean... there's a cure?"

Ranma chuckled - a bitter half-laugh that Kunou knew well. "I
seriously doubt it; however, it is a possibility. I won't know
anything until tomorrow, though." She managed a smile, something to
tell the world she wasn't beaten yet. "But, if it is... what about
us? What then?"

A sigh escaped from Kunou's lips. This was harder than he had
thought. "Remember that little experiment we had with Jusenkyo water
a few months back?" He smiled; he had actually made her laugh.
Instinctively, he tightened his grip around her. "If it means living
with a curse every day to be with you, then I do it. It's that
simple. Love is that simple."

He couldn't conceal his dismay when she shook her head. "I... I wish
it was that easy." Her eyes met his; her ferocity was coming out.
"Do you know what it's like to wake up in a body that's not your own?
I've had more nightmares than dreams ever since this curse came to
me. I've lost a fiancee, lost a relationship with my father,
destroyed friendships, nearly took my own life... and all because one
day the curse decided to go a little haywire." The shadows drooped
over her forehead, extending across her face. "I couldn't ask anyone
to go through that."

The words came, before he could even think them. "You didn't ask,
Ranma."

The young woman sagged in his arms; he could only imagine what she
was going through inside. "Kunou... it's just a bad time. Maybe
if... I dunno. Kunou, I'm just not ready yet."

Kunou nodded. He couldn't help the tears that trickled down his
cheeks. "I... understand, Ranma." He bit his lip, hoping for some
hope. "Do you still want to watch the thunderstorm with me?"

Ranma didn't say a word; she just snuggled into his embrace, and
moved the blankets so that she would be more comfortable. He
couldn't see, but knew she was crying; occasionally, a hot teardrop
would splash on his hand.

It wasn't what he was hoping for, he knew. But, at least it wasn't
what he feared. She knew, and hadn't totally rejected him; that was
enough. And maybe, just maybe...

*********************************************

The hospital was, like most of the others she'd been to, an anomaly.
It reeked of an unnatural sterility, a cleanliness that somehow
seemed in violation of every human instinct. There was no soul to
the building or its furniture; it was functional, but not spiritual.
And, yet, it was the place where people were supposed to be mended -
a contradiction to her, as the spirit had to be mended before the
body could join it in health.

Cologne must absolutely detest the place, she thought.

She found herself rubbing her wrists as she walked down the hall; she
quickly stopped herself, and put her hands at her sides. This was
one time when she didn't want to show any weakness - not until she
knew it was okay. Nervously, she smoothed out her shirt and slacks,
and knocked on the door.

"Come in."

She opened the door slowly, as though fearing it would shatter. She
knew that whatever was on the other side would not be a very pleasant
sight.

Cologne was the only resident of the room; she was glad for that, as
she didn't want to make a scene in front of others. Her wrinkled
face was slightly gaunt; there was a yellowish tint to her skin and
eyes, a sickly pallor that nearly made her nauseous. There was no
aura that she could see; the matriarch who had coerced, muscled, and
outright threatened to get her way had vanished, replaced by a lonely
old woman.

Ranma waved to her. "Hello." She grimaced; the word sounded so...
inadequate.

"Hello, Ranma." Cologne managed a weak smile. "Thank you for coming
to visit me."

She shrugged. "Yeah, well..." She tried to act nonchalant, even
while her insides twisted.

The old woman smiled. "Well, thank you anyway. Life in its winter
can be horribly lonely." She raised a shaking hand to the water
pitcher. "Would you like some?"

Ranma nodded. She knew how perceptive Cologne was; no doubt, the old
woman could hear her panicked heartbeat. "Sure." She walked over to
the pitcher, and poured a glass. "Do you want any?"

"No. I'm fine, thank you." The shaking hands went back to gripping
the bedrails. Cologne continued to stare through her, waiting as she
made herself more comfortable.

"So. How have you been?"

Ranma opened her mouth, then hesitated for a moment. For once, she
honestly didn't know how to answer. "Well... everything's going
okay, now. The dojo's busier than it ever was when Mr. Tendo was
running it. I'm also going to college, and plan on graduating with a
degree in physical education in about a year or so."

Cologne pursed her lips. "And Akane? How are the two of you doing?"

Ranma looked away. As much as she wanted to know what had happened,
there were some things that she didn't want to remember. "We...
broke up. About a year after I..." Her voice trailed off as she got
a look at her host. "Are you okay, Cologne?"

"No." Cologne wiped tears from her face. "It will never be okay,
Ranma." The matriarch forced her face back into a parody of her
normal calm. "And my Shampoo? How has her life gone since my
departure?"

Ranma's nails began to groove into the chair. It was clear as day
that Cologne knew what had happened, but... why the dancing around?
And the sorrow as well? "Well... she married Mousse about a year
after you left. They have a healthy daughter, who's apparently the
spitting image of her mother." She tried to smile, to ease Cologne's
worries. "They'll be visiting Japan in about two months, if you want
to see them."

Cologne looked downward, like a drunk trying to eye the empty glass.
"I won't be around that long. I won't survive the next week." Her
dark eyes turned back to her guest. Ranma flinched; there was so
much pain behind them... "Is there any particular reason why they're
coming?"

Ranma sighed. "Akane's marrying Ryouga then."

Any walls behind Cologne's mask shattered at that moment. Her face
twisted, as though someone had stuck a knife through her ribs. Hands
that had once shattered rocks gripped the bedrails tightly, jaundiced
flesh wishing it could work magic once more.

"Ranma, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It was so arrogant of me, so
stupid... and... and..."

Ranma's eyes widened as she realized...

"... I was the one who cursed you. I had tried to use it to get you
for Shampoo, but... but something went wrong and... and... I'm sorry,
Ranma. For everything."

The plastic cup hit the floor with a hollow popping sound, soon
followed by the soft splash of cold water.

*********************************************

Damn me.

Too late; I've already been damned. She just confirmed it.

If I thought it would help, I'd slit my own wrists to make it better.
It's clear Ranma's doing well (very well, in fact); unfortunately,
like everything else traumatic that people go through, Ranma's
transition left scars both physical and emotional. She doesn't know
what to feel about me, that much is obvious.

To be honest, I thought she'd attack me. I watched the anger flare
up inside of her, that power as bright as the sun preparing to finish
the job that time began. For a moment, I thought that power worthy
of my successorship would consume me, ki like heavenly judgment
raining down upon me. At least it would be over, then; at least the
ending would be warm.

And, at the last second, Ranma turned and ran.

Why?

Part of me wants to hope that a part of her forgives me, or at the
very least understands. I cannot hope for that much; I don't deserve
mercy, let alone forgiveness. Perhaps she felt the pain of my ending
would be a greater punishment than my immediate execution. Death
would be a mercy for me, if the aftermath were not so terrible.

My yellowed eyes turn to my hands. Weak, fragile things; they
couldn't even crush a walnut, now. This wasting away has left them
so unstable that even holding a pen would be... would be...

That's it. I berate my mind, and wonder if that has gone as well for
not thinking of it sooner. I reach for the nurse call, and press the
button.

"Is something wrong?" I rarely call; they must think it a serious
emergency.

"Could you please get me a pen, paper, and two envelopes? I... have
some writing to do."

The sigh on the other end gives me pause; she knows what I am about
to do, and why. "As you wish. I'll be there in a minute."

My arms rest as I let go of the call; there is so little strength
left that even such a small conservation as that can be critical. My
mind begins to construct the composition, working at speeds which my
hands cannot.

*********************************************

With a great sigh, Akane walked through the door to her house, and
slid it shut behind her. The day had been a trying one; a few of the
morning-class students had decided to be late on their payments, and
the business exam she'd just finished was a killer. Moreover, she
had arrangements to make with the florist that afternoon, a meeting
that she was not particularly looking forward to.

Needless to say, it was not a good day.

Picking herself up from the wall, she moved from the door and toward
the kitchen. Cooking always cheered her up - at least, it did now
that she had some patience for it. Besides, Ryouga would be done
with his classes soon, and he would definitely appreciate something
to snack on.

The *thwack* of flesh on wood got her attention, and she turned her
head to investigate. Ranma was punching a wrapped plank
mechanically, punishing the wood in an even, clockwork rhythm.
Normally that would not have concerned her; however, Ranma's
expression did.

There was no life in Ranma's face. Punch after punch, Ranma never
grimaced, never smiled, never broadcast the tempest of emotions that
formed the core of her onetime fiance. It was as though her soul had
left her. Akane swallowed, and approached her carefully.

"What's wrong, Ranma?"

Ranma blinked once, then continued punching.

"Is it about the wedding, Ranma? Is that what's bothering you?"

Ranma never wavered; however, her lack of reaction suggested that it
wasn't the wedding. Akane sighed, and racked her brains for other
reasons.

"Did something happen between you and Kunou?"

Again, relative silence. Akane clenched her fists, reining in her
worst enemy.

"Dammit, Ranma, speak to me!"

Ranma grimaced slightly, and shifted her stance for another punch.
The impact was so hard that it cracked the plank at its base. Ranma
blinked at the now-ruined plank, and sighed.

"Akane, if someone had taken your life away and you had been given a
chance to exact revenge, what would you do?"

Akane blinked, then touched her friend's arm. "What happened, Ranma?"

The redhead closed her eyes. A tear rolled down her cheek. "I... I
found out who locked me today."

"What?" Akane looked around. "Who?"

Ranma's expression twisted into something Akane had rarely seen in
her: contempt. "Cologne. She was even sorry for what she did - like
that's supposed to be some consolation. 'Sorry for ruining your
life, Ranma! I didn't mean to!'" She shook her head. "And, right
now, I don't know what to do."

Akane looked at the remains of the post. Anger began to crystalize
inside of her. "Except beat the ever-living stuffing out of
something, it seems."

Ranma gave a half-hearted chuckle. "It worked before..."

Akane picked up the plank of wood; the weight felt reassuring in her
grip. She turned the plank over in her hands as her mind thought of
something to say. "Ranma, what does your heart tell you?"

The redhead shook her head. "Too much. I... part of me wants to rip
her eyes out, to make sure she hurts just as much as she hurt me.
But... it feels wrong, somehow."

Akane crossed her arms. "Why? She hurt you in a way that you can't
even begin to measure. Heck, she hurt *me* in ways that I never
thought I'd experience. Why would you want to hold back?"

Ranma was tight-lipped once more. She crouched next to the remaining
stump of wood.

"She's hurting, isn't she? Just as much as you did then."

After a moment, Ranma nodded. "She... lost everything because of
what she did to me. She could never go back to the village, she
couldn't come here... all she could do for the past four years is
wander the world alone." She grit her teeth. "I've been there,
Akane; so has Ryouga. It's not fun."

Akane tried to smile for her friend. She fumed inside; she felt like
ripping the plank into splinters, then shoving those splinters down
Cologne's throat. Unfortunately, at that moment Ranma needed more
courage than what was inside of her - and she had to supply it to
her. "Did you... find out why?"

Ranma shook her head. "I didn't stay that long. After she told
me... I couldn't stay. I don't think I could have held myself off
much longer."

The bride-to-be looked down at her sneakers. "Do you want to find
out why?"

At this, Ranma seemed to stare out into nothing for a full minute.
"I would. But..."

"Would it help if someone were there to accompany you? Friday is our
off day for the dojo..."

Ranma's head moved around curiously, as though she were debating the
pros and cons of the idea. "Y... yeah. Yes, it would." She stood
up, put together in order once more. "Thanks, Akane."

Akane shrugged. Even after all this time, she didn't know how to
take thanks from a person she'd nearly killed. "Anytime, Ranma."

*********************************************

Ranma stared up at the ceiling in her room. This was her time to go
over the day's events; all too often, the day was so chaotic that any
sort of personal organization would have to wait until bedtime.

Today's events certainly qualified as chaotic.

She was calm, now; the shock and anger of Cologne's revelation had
worn off. That had both its good and bad points, as she could see
with more clarity the events that had taken place. Cologne wasn't
faking it; she was genuinely sorry, and any physical pain she was in
was eclipsed by emotional wounds. Ranma had a conscience; she
couldn't hurt anyone who was in pain like that.

Cologne, in her heyday, would have called it a weakness. But how
weak should she be?

She closed her eyes, and tried to imagine the early days, just after
the curse had started to go haywire. Akane's lips pressed against
her own, even while the padding between their chests grew. Mornings
waking up with a body that wasn't hers came back to her, the start to
long days where all she wanted to do was fade away into nothing. The
sting of the razor made itself felt, and she rubbed her wrists in
remembrance.

Considering all that had happened, it was a miracle she survived. Of
course, miracles had been her stock in trade. Survival had been her
miracle in that debacle; she'd just been hoping for a greater one.

She sighed and turned over onto her side, jamming the pillow against
her ear in the process. There was so much she didn't know about what
had happened. Cologne had mentioned that something had gone wrong;
what? And what happened to Happousai in all of that? Maybe after
that, she could give some sort of judgment in the matter.

She closed her eyes, and focused on the other major problem in her
life. Kunou had asked to go to the next stage, to deepen their
relationship in a very personal, intimate way. It was time, they
both knew; in fact, their relationship was starting to stall because
she was refusing to go on. She didn't want to lose the
relationship... but she didn't know what to do about him. The
thought of him putting *that* in *there*... there were still times
when it frightened her, even though she welcomed the sensations that
arousal gave to her second body. There was so much that was
involved in that one little step, and she wasn't sure if she was
ready for that package of goodies.

Too many problems - definitely too many problems. Ranma turned over
to her other side, away from the window, and purposely shut her eyes
from the light. She'd find the answers eventually; she always did.

*********************************************

Sometimes, the storm is at peace.

Ranma knelt in the center of the dojo, her eyes closed in meditation.
A pristine karate gi covered her form in billowing white clouds,
acting as a frame for the sunset of her face. She did not smile,
nor was her face turned in a frown; she sought the neutral place
where emotions were no longer a concern, where only the pure spirit
remained.

And that spirit was never more beautiful to Kunou's eyes. When she
meditated, the weights of her past washed away from her for precious
moments, leaving that angel shining bright like the morning sun. He
wanted her to know that peace in every waking moment; however, he
also knew how elusive that peace was.

"You can stop ogling me now, Kunou."

The words were spoken so softly that Kunou blinked in surprise.
Ranma turned to regard him, her eyes touched with amusement. He
shuffled his feet, and moved toward her.

"I... apologize. I did not mean to disturb your meditations."

Ranma exhaled quickly, a move that was almost a chuckle. "It's okay,
Kunou." She patted the wood next to her. "Come on. I won't bite."

Kunou frowned. "You did last week..."

The giggles began to develop in earnest. "Well, you drive me to it
sometimes." Her eyes followed him as he moved to kneel next to her.

"How were your meditations?" He relaxed his position slightly; when
in the dojo, he fought sometimes not to act in a proper manner.

"Good. Very good." She reached over and touched his arm. The
sensation for him was like being burned and frozen at the same time.
"I... was thinking about the day we met."

Kunou grimaced. "Oh, no... not *that* day."

Ranma nodded, her expression like a Cheshire cat. "Come on. It
wasn't that bad."

He crossed his arms. "Well, you weren't the one who had the symbol
'insufferable' written on his forehead all day long."

She broke into full giggles, then sobered. "Kunou, I... I don't know
if I can forgive Cologne in time. I know she's changed, I know she's
suffered... but it hurts so much. She took away everything that I
held dear - and all because she wanted me to be her
great-granddaughter's toy." A painful grimace marred her perfect
beauty. "I... I want to forgive her, believe me I do. But I don't
think I can."

Kunou looked away. "That's why you were thinking about the day we
met - so you can figure out how we forgave each other."

Ranma nodded. "We... needed each other, then. It was either
forgive, or..." She rubbed her wrists, as though a chill had entered
the room.

Kunou frowned. "Ranma, you have to do something to let go, if you
want to forgive. It's the only way to keep from returning to our
second meeting place."

"Such as?" Ranma's finger traced a line along a floorboard.

He shook his head. "Only you can know that." Frowning, he put his
hands over hers; he still marveled that something so dainty and small
could smash boulders without effort. "But, when you do find out, we
will be here with you."

"We?" Ranma's brow furrowed.

"Nothing you do is alone, Ranma. You know that." He smiled. "The
people around you care for you very much, and will never let you slip
like you did before." His voice trembled. "We... love you too
much."

Ranma looked up at him, her eyes meeting his for the first time. She
stared at his face; for a moment, he was tempted to ask if someone
had tattooed a message on his forehead again. After a moment, she
relaxed, and gave a broad smile.

"Thanks, Kunou. That means... that means a lot to me." She turned
her hand around, to grip his. "I think I'll need it tomorrow."

He didn't want to let go; he wanted to hold her forever, their hands
expressing love that others could never understand. He rubbed a
finger along her wrist, along her scar - his way of showing his
acceptance of her. "I'll be there."

Her grin took a wry turn. "You'd better be."

*********************************************

"Ranma! Wake up!"

The redhead sputtered at the cold water in her face, and glared at
the person standing over her. "Akane! You didn't have to splash me,
you know!"

Akane put her hands on her hips, turning Ranma's attention to just
how little in the way of sleepwear she was wearing. "I tried
everything else!" She sighed. "Tofu's on the phone."

Ranma rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "What does he want?"

Akane shook her head. "He wouldn't tell me. He just said it was
important."

Yawning, Ranma rose from the bed and made her way downstairs. She
was so tired that she nearly placed the receiver backwards. "Hello?"

"Ranma?"

She yawned again. "Yeah?"

A yawn came from the other end of the phone line. "I just got a
phone call from Dr. Yoshida down at the hospital." Ranma could count
her heartbeats: one, two, three... "Cologne... has taken a turn for
the worse. They... don't expect her to survive much longer."

Ranma blinked at the news; she honestly didn't know what to think of
it. "I... see. Will they allow me to visit?"

"Yes." Tofu's voice was strained. "Since there's nothing they can
do for her... they'll let in anyone wishing to visit."

"Thanks, Doc. I'll be there as soon as I can." Ranma hung up the
phone and made her way back to the room. She got ready quickly; she
didn't have time to worry about how tired she was or what assignments
she was likely to sleepwalk through that day. She didn't have time
to worry about anything else.

She had to go, for one final time... to make peace, or war.

*********************************************

Ranma inched the door open. She still didn't know if it was okay;
the nurses had said nothing when she entered the room, so she assumed
that it must be all right. Dawn hadn't come yet; the skies glowed
orange with the promise of day, but that day had yet to blossom.

Cologne lay quietly on the bed, as though in state. The monitor
droned away; occasionally, her heart would falter slightly, then pick
up the normal rhythm it had maintained for a century. Ranma could
tell immediately; Cologne was nowhere near well, and the doctor's
predictions of mortality were likely accurate.

Biting her lip, Ranma moved over to the bed. She sat down on the
chair's edge and clasped her hands together, as though in prayer.

"Hey, Cologne. It's... it's me."

She grimaced; this felt strange. Of course, she wasn't likely to get
another chance. "Cologne, I came by... to tell you... to talk to
you... about who I am. I... I think I owe you that much - whether
you meant to do this to me or not, whether you can even hear me in
there, you at least deserve to know."

A noise from outside got her attention for a moment; apparently
someone else was sliding away. "After I... was stuck as a woman,
I... I hated myself for the longest time. I mean, here I was, in
this borrowed body that was everything I despised in me... and I was
forced to wear it every day, like a costume that wouldn't come off.
I... all I could do was lash out at everyone near me. I was in so
much pain... it was all I could do anymore. I had died long before I
slashed my wrists; I imagine I probably died after the last attempt
at a cure."

She managed a smile; her throat was beginning to hurt. "Who I am now
was born in the two months after my... suicide attempt. I met a
friend, one who was hurting like I was... and who needed a friend to
make it through his problems. He was attracted to me, yet he had the
honor to let me live, to let me find out who I really was. He waited
for me to love him... something that I grew into. My childhood - the
childhood of who I am - was in that hospital."

Her knuckles turned white from her grip. Her eyes gazed sightlessly
forward; her words were revelations to her as she uttered them.
"Cologne, I'm not a child anymore. I know who I am now; I know my
place in this world." She managed a small smile; she knew the tears
were coming, but she didn't care. Not now. "And, for the first time
since I was first splashed, I'm not ashamed, Cologne. I'm not
ashamed. And God, I never thought that would feel so good."

Ranma stood up, and regarded Cologne's face. Some people radiated
peace when they slept; Cologne looked as though she were burning
herself out, even as there was no energy left to burn. Definitely a
face with too many secrets, and too many sins beneath the surface.

"Cologne, I don't know if you meant to curse me or not. I don't care
anymore. What's done is done. If you meant to, know this: I won."
She gritted her teeth, her voice shifting to a harsh whisper. "I
won. And if not, well... you don't have to worry about me anymore.
It's done now - well, almost done. I... I almost wish you could
see..."

Ranma brushed Cologne's cheek lightly. She tried to imagine some
innocence in that face, some sign that there was still hope for
her... but saw only the tortures of the damned. She reached down
and squeezed Cologne's hand. "Good bye, Cologne. I pray you find
some peace in whatever is beyond this life." She walked away, daring
to steal a glance at her body before leaving, then turned forward.

There was a lot to do that day - and the first thing was to sleep.

*********************************************

It's cold.

It's so cold.

I guess I never thought the end would be like this. Amazon lore
teaches about the ancestors' judgment at the end, where all the
warriors who came before me look upon my actions and sentence me to
torment or paradise among their number. I always thought I would
face my gods.

Now, I realize that I don't warrant even that. They've already seen
what a fool I was, and have cast their judgment against me. All I
feel is cold; all I see is a white nothing; all I hear are wails. I
don't know if they are my own, or someone else's; after all, this is
the end.

Shapes form in the white around me, blurs so fast I almost can't see
them; what I do see, however, causes me to gasp.

It's judgment, in the worst way possible.

Feelings pass over me; I feel a baby's irrational need for security
and warmth through my aged psyche, and a child's pain at the loss of
his mother. I realize how much I have in common with this child;
both of us were hardened into warriors at an early age, and lost much
of our childhood as a result. I always did hate that man I now also
know as Father; now, I have double the reason for despising him.

Years come and go like a summer breeze; I feel kinship as my other
self plays with his newfound friend. I want to help my other self as
he is cruelly tossed into the pit of cats; instead, I feel his
torment as the felines rake their claws over my second skin, and yowl
in madness along with him as we together escape from the private
hell. Another playmate comes along; I smile as I meet Ryouga again,
and we play our little games on a junior high's stage.

I enjoy it while I can. I know the worst is yet to come.

What comes is Jusenkyo. I feel the shock and horror of a body that
isn't ours, but is something else... something alien to my other
self. Rage fills us; I bite back frustration as Genma doesn't get
what he should have had coming to him. I see the Amazon village
through a stranger's eyes; my other self's view is remarkably
complimentary. I see the flaws in Shampoo's attack, and realize she
deserved to get knocked off the pedestal. I don't see my old self in
the crowd; that is perhaps for the best.

Tokyo fills my vision; the Tendos take up much of our life, as does
the curse. I feel the growing attachment toward Akane - the first
true evidence of my damnation. They loved each other more than
anyone realized, myself included, and I feel shame with each moment
they draw closer. I also see the antics of Shampoo, Kodachi,
Ukyou... to my other self, it was all a game, something to keep
loneliness at bay. I felt his heartbreak at our schism with Ukyou; I
remember how I viewed the breakup as an opportunity. Wedding plans
were made, dreams forged, each one reminding me of what I destroyed.

The morning after... after feeling the change in that manner, I make
a vow never to use the formula again, not in that way. In my
one-and-a-half lifetimes, I had never felt agony like that, not even
from childbirth. The events of the following weeks and months pass
by, as something I'd never felt in my other self comes forth -
despair. Slowly, we lose everything: our manhood, our strength, our
friends... Akane. I try to will my eyes shut, but they will not
close; I try to close my ears, but still they hear; I try to pull my
mind away from the torment I caused, but I am chained to the one I
harmed.

Chained to the wrist - the very same wrists we slashed. I could feel
our anguish at Akane's betrayal, the desire to *end* *it*, the sting
of the razor blade as it pierces skin; the death chill as our life's
blood flows out of our veins, as our *life* flows out of the mortal
seeming...

... only to have us wake up again, in a cold, impersonal hospital. I
feel our wish to leave the place, to finish what we have started, our
desire to end the pain that we thought no mortal force could soothe.

We thought. I would never have expected the buffoon kendoist to have
such a soul; neither did she. There was nothing else for us, and
nothing for him, so we came together under the watchful eye of the
psychiatrists. Such is life, we think.

I smile at the synchronicity.

Other scenes come up, ones far more pleasant; the taste of sweet
freedom, along with the insecurity such freedom brings. I can feel
strength returning to our body, as a new purpose comes to our lives.
For the first time since before my blunder, we have a goal, and we
are working hard to achieve it. I feel the closeness we have to
Kunou, along with the fear and indecision such personal intimacy
brings. Occasionally we steal glances Akane's way - the only truly
painful moments that come to us.

Another time of testing comes, and I find myself buffeted with
sadness once more. Still, we are better prepared for it; the news
causes us to sever the last romantic ties to our old life, and
embrace the new. It is different in Kunou's embrace; it is the
contentment of protection that we feel that night.

We can't ever recall feeling truly safe, not until he held us in his
arms. We progress this path, struggling with every kiss, every
caress. We feel longing - we both share it - yet we cannot act on
it. There is a last lingering part of our manhood, a memento from
younger days, blocking our progress.

Time slows, and I find us together, facing my old life one final
time. I hear our words, and know we believe them; it is still
difficult for me to believe in forgiveness. I don't deserve it, not
after what I'd done.

I expect this to be the end of my journey. After all, we have come
to the present. I am gone, consumed by age. It is time for us to
separate, I think, and for me to face my judgment.

Strangely enough, a voice calls to me and says no. Not yet.

I open my eyes wide... and realize why. The future awaits both of
us; I feel our resolution, our courage as we tear the last of our
barriers down. There is nothing standing in the way, now. What I
have done has been undone; the damage I have wrought is repaired.

And, in that moment of redemption, I know a warmth like I have never
known, and a peace I thought I would never find.

*********************************************

Kunou Tatewaki held the bokken in his hands, his eyes focused on the
invisible target in front of him. Classes were done for the day; the
only opponents he had left to face were those who resided in the
shadows. For his practice, he imagined some honorable samurai in
front of him, someone who would test his skills to the utmost. The
faintest crease of a smile appeared on his face as he began his
warrior's dance.

The phantom opened with a straight thrust, a powerful stroke that
Kunou parried to the side. He tried a feint-thrust combination to
the phantom's exposed side; the shadow warrior wasn't falling for it,
though, and parried his blade to the side. A series of attacks,
feints, and parries came; he fought the urge to become too eager for
the prize, and made himself wait for the opportunity to attack. He
saw the opening, pulled his bokken back for the thrust...

Only to stop as a real bokken pushed his own out of harm's way. He
moved into a more relaxed position as a new opponent showed her
blade.

Ranma circled around him, like a panther eyeing prey. Kunou's eyes
widened at her choice of attire; clad in a snow-white hakama, she
seemed an angel of the battlefield. She held a bokken in her hands,
and pointed it straight at his heart.

"I understand that you wish to defeat me in combat so that you may
date with me."

Kunou gaped. It took a moment for him to regain his composure.
"Indeed. Only a warrior capable of taming a tigress such as yourself
could ever hope to capture your heart." He moved his bokken into a
guard position. "Are you ready?"

She smiled; for a moment, he saw her mask slip, and glimpsed what she
was feeling behind the acting. "I am. Begin, if you truly desire
me."

The two circled each other, their weapons at the ready. He moved
closer; she backed up only slightly. He touched her blade, and
pushed it aside.

He smiled. There was no resistance. With a swift motion, he moved
his blade to touch her guard, and disarmed her with a flick of his
wrist. Her weapon clattered to the floor - the only sound in the
room.

His heartbeat thundered in his ears once silence returned. He
lowered his guard and approached her, their eyes locked to each
other. Ranma tried to act in character, even if her face was
betraying her. She looked up to him; they were so close that he
could see the shimmer in her eyes.

"Oh, my. It would seem that I am at your mercy. Whatever shall I do
now?"

Kunou raised an eyebrow. "You did mention a date..."

Ranma reached up, and pulled him down to her. "I want more, Kunou.
A lot more." He found himself conquered in her grasp, as she kissed
him with all the passion between them.

After a moment, they broke it off. Kunou looked down at her; she up
at him. She smiled, in that way that let him know there was no
cynicism, no guilt, no sadness... only love.

"I'm ready now, Kunou."

*********************************************

Epilogue

"I can't stand all this waiting." Ryouga paced around the room, and
adjusted his bowtie for the seventh time in as many minutes. "I... I
feel like hitting something!"

A slender hand moved in front of his body. "Ryouga, sit down. If
you keep on pacing like this, I will give you something to hit." She
snorted. "Though you couldn't hit me on your best day..."

Ryouga swung halfheartedly. "Yeah, Ranma. Right. At least I don't
fight like a girl."

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "Considering your bride-to-be trashed about
everyone in this room at one time or another, that's a pretty big
compliment."

"Yeah..." Ryouga's eyes softened, apparently imagining events of the
near future.

Tofu looked over at Kunou, and adjusted the fit of his tux jacket.
"Are they always like this?"

Kunou shrugged. "No. Normally they just start swinging." A wry
grin formed on his face. "Considering the way they act around each
other, you would think that it was Ranma that Ryouga was marrying
today." His reward for the comment was a glare from the two people
in question.

Ryouga closed his eyes, and sighed. "I'm going to the bathroom."

"Oh no, you don't. Not by yourself, anyway." Ranma grabbed him by
the collar of his jacket. "Tofu, escort him, please. Take him by
the hand down to the bathroom, and do not let him out of your sight
until he is back in this room."

"Ranma, I..." Ryouga started to protest, then fell silent. "Okay.
Come on, Doc." Tofu took him by the hand, and led him out of the
room.

Ranma, at least, was glad for the break. She sat down in Tofu's
place, and took off her heels.

"Don't like the shoes?" Kunou raised an eyebrow. "You know, you
could have worn dress shoes if you wanted to."

Ranma flashed him a dark look as she started to rub her feet.
"Unfortunately, I've got about thirty centimeters of height to make
up. Besides, there are some things this outfit can't hide." She
flapped her jacket open, showing off her curves more dramatically in
the process. "Not exactly a good 'best man', am I?"

"Better than most." Kunou's smile faded as he put his arms around
her waist. "Are you going to be okay, Ranma?"

Ranma shrugged, and put her shoes back on. "I guess. I mean, I've
had a year to prepare for this." She looked downward. "If not...
I'll let you know. Okay?"

Kunou nodded, and kissed her hair. "I love you."

Her old smile - that cocky Saotome grin - returned. "I know." She
wrung her hands together, its small pain enough to distract. "To be
honest, I wish *I* had something to hit. All this waiting for two
sets of 'I do'..."

Kunou smiled. "Considering all that went into the wedding, I think
most of it isn't for the couple in question, but for their family and
friends." His arms slithered across her stomach, moving her closer
to him. "I do think they should have taken our advice and eloped."

Ranma shook her head, all the while trying to control the warm shiver
inside of her. "Akane would never have gone for that. She liked the
dress too much." A mixed smile formed on her face. "Guys couldn't
care less about the stuff that goes on outside of the ceremony. All
that matters is that she's there. Girls, on the other hand... they
want to look beautiful. They want to make the best bride possible,
and try to ensure the ceremony is as breathtaking as they can get
it."

She could feel Kunou's wry grin behind her. "And you? What sort of
ceremony would you prefer?"

Ranma blinked for a moment, then smiled. "We're eloping."

Kunou laughed. His chuckle felt so... good to her. "I'll have to
remember that." A silence descended on the pair; Ranma concentrated
on the warm feeling surrounding her.

"Kunou?"

"You do realize I'm going to have to break you of that habit, Ranma."

Ranma chuckled. "Old habits die hard, Tacchi." She dug her
fingernails into her hands. "Tacchi, can we... leave early, once
Akane and Ryouga head out? I don't want to stay any longer than I
have to."

A hand moved away from her abdomen; she felt it stroke her hair,
before resting on the side of her head. "Of course, Ranma. As the
lady wishes..." She shivered as she felt a kiss on her neck, just
above the collar. The brush of a second kiss made itself felt, just
before the door creaked open.

Damn.

Tofu and Ryouga walked back into the doorway. The two men looked at
each other, eyebrows raised. "You two do realize it's not too late
for a double ceremony," Ryouga crowed.

Ranma spied an empty plastic bottle within arm's reach, and hurled it
at the groom. "Ryouga... no." She sighed as he dodged its path.
"Besides, one wedding to worry about today is enough."

Tofu gestured to the door he'd just passed through. "They're ready
to start. They want us to line up and get ready."

Ranma swallowed, and nodded her assent. A momentary wave of cold
surrounded her, as Kunou unwrapped himself from her. He straightened
out his jacket, then offered a hand out to her.

"Shall we?"

She couldn't help but grin. Whenever there was any sort of formal
event, Kunou allowed a touch of his old self to come out - not enough
for him to start misquoting poetry, but enough to make her smile.
She accepted the hand, and eased herself up off of the chair.

She straightened out her jacket, and looked over at him. "How do I
look?" Upon seeing the look on his face, she frowned. "Never mind.
You wouldn't be able to give me a straight answer even if you wanted
to." She adjusted the fit of her tie. "Well, let's get this over
with." She followed Tofu and Ryouga outside, to the entrance of the
chapel.

The place was a nice Christian church, a testament to a foreign god
formed of imported woods and stained glass. It did not seek the
harmony of Shinto or Buddhism, as no religion which focused so much
on the murder of one could be so concerned with harmony. Rather, it
was in glory that it focused; the intricate carvings all told of
ascendance not from within, but from without. It was not the quiet
beauty of the Japanese garden that resided here, but the noisy
perfection of the Hiryuu Shouten Ha, or Mouko Takabisha. Ranma had
no particular opinion on the religion, but she decided that the
place, at least, had class.

She swallowed, and focused on the back of Kunou's head. She didn't
want to think about what was about to happen, and she certainly
didn't want to look at any of the guests. If she did that, if she
let herself see the glow of happiness they felt... she might lose any
control she had left. She could hear Ryouga shuffling behind her; if
she was nervous, he was probably two minutes away from a nosebleed.

The music started; she gave a quiet thanks that they finally got the
show started. Tofu, the first groomsman, started his march; Kunou
followed, then her. She could feel the eyes on her as she walked;
many of the people in the audience had agreed to show up for the last
attempt Akane had at a wedding - an attempt canceled due to the
groom's medical problems.

With a blink, past events vanished. There was no future, there was
no past, there was only the now. And now, two of her closest friends
were becoming husband and wife, and she had to be there to support it.
She finished her march down the aisle, and moved into her position,
scant feet away from Ryouga's center stage.

The march started its second verse, the cue for the bridesmaids to
come out. Sayuri, Akane's friend, was the first bridesmaid; Ranma
raised an eyebrow at the brown-haired woman. Kasumi and Nabiki chose
the dresses well; the burgundy outfits seemed appropriate among the
hardwoods and glass. Sayuri gave Ranma a strange look as she made
her way to the other side; Ranma questioned with her gaze, but could
say nothing.

Kasumi was the second bridesmaid. She'd only gained a couple of
pounds so far as a result of the pregnancy; as such, she made a
ravishing beauty in the outfit. Ranma heard a commotion to her side,
and glanced over there; Tofu's glasses were fogging up, the first
sign of him losing it over his wife's beauty. Fortunately, Kunou
gently kicked him in the leg before he could totally flip out.
Kasumi gave one of her quiet smiles toward him, and took her place
among the bridesmaids.

Ranma wasn't sure what to make of the third bridesmaid; Nabiki was
calm and collected, even at this most important hour. The
businesswoman glanced at the groomsmen with an enigmatic smile -
whether it was aimed at Ranma, Kunou, or Ryouga was unknown - and
took her place nearest the center of the aisle.

The music changed, and Ranma swallowed. Akane began to make her way
to the front of the chapel. Bedecked in a beautiful lace wedding
dress, she had never looked more lovely, as it both accentuated her
own curves while adorning them with various bits of silk and pearl.
Her face was obscured enough by the veil to make her appear covered
in mist, while showing enough that there was no doubt as to the
beauty behind the fog.

Ranma closed her eyes. Some memories would not be denied, and she
had too many memories of Akane to deny all of them. Old dreams,
cooled embers from bonfires long extinguished, came forth, tempting
her with demon's promises.

A hand reached out to steady her, causing her to look to her left.
Kunou's eyes were not on the main attraction; instead, he was focused
more on the sideshow. They didn't say a word. They didn't have to.

His hand wrapped around her, ending somewhere between her spine and
her side. She knew why; anything more would be too much for the
ceremony. Ranma concentrated on the warmth of Kunou's hand; it was a
comfort she'd come to enjoy over the past year.

Right now, she needed as much comfort as she could get.

Most of the minister's words were meaningless to her; she let the
sermons on the importance of the marriage vows pass over her head.
They were not important to her, not yet; besides, she'd had vows like
that broken behind her back. What mattered to her was the love
between the couple, the strings that bound two hearts together.
Akane and Ryouga had it, a lot more than their family realized. If
they hadn't, they would have split up a long time ago.

And... she and Kunou had it, a lot more than anyone realized. It was
an understanding between them, a form of sharing scars that no person
who hadn't been in the hospital could understand. She knew his
madness, could feel his urge to descend into the fantasies of what
could never be. He knew her pain, her knowledge that she would never
be the person she had wanted to be, and the torture of living a life
that she neither asked for nor wanted.

The deep, booming voice of the minister broke out of her reverie.
She blinked, and realized with a wry sadness that she'd missed the
part about speaking up to protest the marriage bond.

"Do you, Ryouga, take Akane to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love,
honor, and cherish, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health,
as long as you both shall live?"

Ryouga's voice squeaked, "I do."

Ranma began to rub her hands together. Her fingers caught on
something sharp, and she paused.

"And do you, Akane, take Ryouga to be your lawfully wedded husband,
to love, honor, and cherish, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in
health, as long as you both shall live?"

Ranma noticed Akane's eyes peering at her from behind the veil, as
though asking for permission. Ranma gave a quiet nod, the only
response she could give. Her hands focused on that sharp catch; her
index finger rubbed across it vigorously.

Akane turned to the minister. "I do."

Ranma didn't see Akane and Ryouga kiss; her eyes may have been
pointed in that direction, but she was feeling more than she was
seeing at that moment. Kunou's hand felt like a warm blanket around
her; the diamond ring on her left hand cut sharply into her right
index finger. Both were a promise, similar to the one that Akane and
Ryouga took. They would love, honor, and cherish each other as long
as they lived. They would get married soon enough, but it didn't
matter. The marriage would simply seal what had been forged slowly
for years.

Ranma leaned closer into Kunou as the applause started, and sighed.
It was an end for the four of them there... but it was a beginning as
well. She smiled and nodded to the Hibikis as the couple turned
toward her and Kunou.

No words were said between them. She smiled, and gestured with her
eyes toward her fiance; Akane did the same with Ryouga. Her smile
broadened.

The next stage - *her* next stage - had begun.

*********************************************

FIN.

*********************************************

Whew.

There's a lot I could say about the writing of this set of stories.
I certainly never expected it to take up the better part of six
months. I figured it would be one story, maybe two, and then a trip
onto something else. I didn't expect to write over 400k on it,
including 200k in a furious six-week stretch (Angel).

Not even the Sunrise works possessed me like this one did. Due to
various things, my emotions were perhaps at their most tumultuous
during the writing of this. I can tell you for certain this series
indirectly earned me a couple of enemies, for whatever reasons. I
do have a royal temper on me in certain situations, and some of
those situations were presented during the writing of this.

So it goes, I guess.

I got a lot of help over the course of these stories. Some of it was
well-appreciated, some of it... well, you can guess. ^_^ Special
thanks go out to James 'Zen' Bateman, Sean Gaffney, Richard Lawson,
Sebastian Weinberg, Diane Brendan, Kevin Hammel, Jamie and Bridget
Wilde, Gary Kleppe, Travis Butler, Mike Loader, Jeff Hosmer, Jeanne
Hedge, and Douglas Reeves for their help over the past few months.
There are a lot more that I have forgotten to mention; I do
apologize, as it's been a crazy ride.

Thank you for taking the time to share this story with me. Have fun,
and God bless.

Nicholas Leifker
nigh...@thekeep.org
http://www.thekeep.org/~nightelf/fanfic
December 21, 1998