[Ranma/Xover][FanFic] The Bet: Reluctant Bet seg 25 "Reluctant Reunion"

[Gregg Sharp]

RELUCTANT BET segment 25 "Reluctant Reunion" OR
"With six you get Senshi."

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon by Naoko Takeuchi, Ranma 1/2 by
Rumiko Takeuchi, J.Saotome by Skysaber, Celeste by Ms. Byrd,
Raptor Blue by M.Wright, Generally weird ideas by me.
Mirrors Multiplied by Skysaber, etc.

--------

RN-SM-DV 291401:

"...and so i found myself here," Ranma said, warming
his hands around a cup of tea.~Ginseng tea with honey, yum!~

Usagi blinked, not having understood much beyond her
being some reincarnated 'Moon Princess' or something.

Ami frowned and steepled her hands in front of her on
the table. "This is all quite strange, is there any proof of
this 'reincarnated Princesses' story? It sounds a lot like
'Magical Princess Sailor Justice' but then so did that
monster."

Rei smirked but didn't say anything.

"There might be a spell or something i could use, but
i'm not really sure." Grey shook his head. "i'm a little
uncertain about throwing out TOO many spells anyway. The way
magic operates can be subtly different from one universe to
another, so the spells may scramble if things get too off.

"i wasn't too worried at first, but *something* was off
on that 'Life Link' spell. i don't suppose any of you
noticed anything... odd?"

Rei shook her head. "No." ~Unless you count viewing past
lives, the absolute certainty that an evil creature left
over from the Silver Millenium is stalking us, that in the
next decade the Internet is going to become extraordinarily
lucrative until a series of market corrections in the year
2000, that there will be an earthquake and fire in Kobe
sometime in 1995 or 1996, there are some hormonally crazed
Amazons heading for the shrine (mental note: if I make them
ahead of time, I can make a *killing* on the charms for safe
childbirth), one of the hormonally crazed Amazons has just
detoured into an Anime store in Nerima and is having to be
physically pried off a giant plushtoy Mokona from "Magic
Knight Rayearth", there are three camera crews with
telescopic lenses who caught the battle with that Mikuji
person and that the official media spin doctors have now
dubbed you my 'guardian angel'. Other than that, no,
nothing.~

Ami looked thoughtful for a moment. "Can't say that I
noticed anything." ~Other than a mild electric shock,
followed by an intense desire to glomp you in what would be
an improper if no doubt satisfying manner.~

"Not a thing," Makoto declared. ~Other than the
incredible resemblence to my sempai and the feeling that we
are connected on just *so* many levels.~

"I'm still really sleepy," volunteered Minako,
neglecting to say that she needed a tall winged cuddle toy
to make her feel cozy.

"Oh," said Grey, missing the mental dialogue completely
as he had made yet another mistake by not having an ESP
spell running. Though it seemed to be getting warm in here.
Maybe he could try a "Cooling Breeze" spell. "Well, in
another day, i've got to go try and wrap things up over at
the Tendo dojo."

"Tendo dojo? As in Nabiki Tendo?" Rei held a finger up
and glared momentarily at Usagi.

"You know her? There is an honor agreement between the
families Saotome and Tendo to marry and unite the schools.
Usually, Ranma is the only son of Genma and Nodoka, and
usually the three children of the Tendo family are three
daughters." Grey shrugged. "There *are* exceptions, though
they have a distressing tendency to fall into familiar
patterns."

"Familiar patterns?" Ami looked at her own tea, too
distressed to drink at the moment. ~I wonder if he's aware
that I was snagged by that spell he cast on Rei? Doubtful.~

"Yeah. Course if this is like timeline RN-RK 302187,
then this could be REALLY different," Grey said hopefully.

"What was that one like?" Rei sighed and tried to shut
the images off that her clairvoyance kept throwing at her.
Of what possible use was the location of some lost car keys
in MILAN?!

"Akane's the girlfriend of her love since they were both
children: Tatewaki Kuno. Nabiki is a bit boy-crazy but
because she wears glasses and is so shy and soft-spoken that
nobody pays any attention to her. She also regrets living in
the shadow of her younger sister and despairs of ever
getting out of it. Kasumi graduated high school, then became
an OL (Office Lady) who is the breadwinner for the Tendo
household after Soun's nervous breakdown."

Ami smiled a little. Guys didn't pay attention to girls
who were shy and wore glasses. Much. At least in Tokyo.
"That doesn't sound much like the Nabiki Tendo who works
here weekends."

"I've met her older sister and she's got a pretty good
manga collection," Rei offered. "Apparently though, the only
places she gets to go to are her house, trips to the market,
and the occasional visit to the family doctor."

"Tofu Ono?" Grey took another sip of tea, luxuriating in
having a sense of taste, something missing from his times as
a cyborg. Though that nutri-paste did have a flavor - PD
Awful.

"Sachiko Inoue," supplied Rei. "Never met her."

Grey smiled speculatively. Maybe this was a Kasumi +
Ranma line. Those didn't happen as often as Akane + Ranma,
Ukyo + Ranma, or Nabiki + Ranma pairings. More often than
Shampoo + Ranma or Kodachi + Ranma pairings. MUCH more often
than (thankfully) Azusa + Ranma or (he'd have to forfeit
this one) Happosai + Ranma-chan.

Rei winced, having just had a vision of the past where
Soun & Genma had made the deal to join their families, only
to have Happosai overhear it and demand that if one of them
had an UNENGAGED daughter by the time the youngest turned
marriageable (sixteen in Japan) then the free daughter would
have to marry HIM. None of the Tendo daughters knew about
this, yet.

Rei scribbled out a note to tell Nabiki about this.
Especially as she also *saw* that Soun had made a number of
*really* bad matches in an attempt to ensure that none of
them would have to marry Happosai. None of which would
manifest in time, save one. And he was sitting across the
table from her now.

"So, i only met Nabiki in THIS timeline briefly. What's
she like?"

Rei looked at the future. She could see... oh dear.
Wasn't that illegal?

Minako answered when she noticed Rei being quiet. "She's
a pretty hardworker from what I've seen. She's usually
cleaning around here, and with all the trees and birds it
needs it. She also is a pretty good photographer and advises
the tourists where the best places are and even takes
photographs for the clumsier ones."

"Like Minako-chan," murmurred Rei, just loud enough to
earn a dirty look from Minako.

"Uhm, Excuse me, question from the back of the room?"
Makoto lifted her hand. "What exactly are we supposed to do
if more of these yoma things show up?"

"i've been thinking about that myself," conceded Grey.
"As there are no hensshin sticks or other sentai trappings
to use, much less your Senshi identities, i'm not sure how
to go about this..."

Rei thought for a moment about that kiss. How it had
awakened the sleeping Princess within her and had increased
her spiritual abilities as a result. How to broach the
subject? Who should be awakened next?

"The last time i crossed paths with the Senshi..." Grey
grew still, remembering how he'd been dumped by the Dead
Millenium Senshi, then the pokemon versions, and finally
been literally ripped apart in a tug of war between the
Sailorjin versions. "i gave empowering items to one group,
saved another group's lives, and was killed by a third...
all..."

Even as suspicious as Makoto was, she picked up on the
despair and conflict showing on the boy. Rei surprised
herself by reaching out to clasp his shoulder and try to
smile reassuringly at him. A moment later and Ami did the
same from the other side.

"Okay," said Grey when he could. They were girls, the
unfair sex, they WOULD betray or abandon him when a taller
or richer guy came along. They were female and therefore it
was in their nature to cause emotional wounds in the male
gender. Look at what happened with Sakyo, she couldn't wait
a day after her little speech to go chasing after someone
else. But they were also people who were in a bad situation
and he had to go assist them. "Rei, i'll need your help. i'm
going to try summoning a few things from home."

----------

The mistress noted that the 'Mikuji' had been defeated
and turned to another manga to select the next villain.

"Too cliche, too ineffectual, too likely to melt down,
too..." She stopped and considered. "Generals? Higher power
minions. Yes, that could work. How to select them..."

The woman came to a mirror of smoky obsidian and tapped
on it with her long nails. "Hey, you, wake up! Time to serve
your master!"

"Rhymes woman, RHYMES! You have to use the proper
procedures!"

Rolling her eyes, the Dark Princess (as she was calling
herself at the moment) was less than impressed. "Yeah, yeah,
whatever. Uhmmm. Here goes.
"Mirror Mirror on the wall,
I seek to make my targets fall,
to hurt them bad,
and make them sad,
it surely would make me glad.
a new minion is what I need,
advice from you is what I plead."

"Awful," pronounced the mirror.

"It's good enough, damn it. Get to the thing!"

The mirror sighed. "No respect, I don't get no respect.

"Seven virtues gather near,
And so I'll make your choices clear.
Seven sins is what you need,
To hurt them bad enough they bleed,
To capture them and make them slaves,
or simply send them to their graves."

"YOU criticize MY poetry?" Dark Princess sniffed.

"Do you want help or not? Hmmmph. I'm a magic mirror,
sweetie, there are Rules for such things. Rhyming is one of
those. You must rhyme the commands, I've got to rhyme the
answers. GOOD poetry isn't a requirement. Ahem.

"Seek ye those who fit the bill,
Dark crystal power within instill,
The world will die and all within,
After bringing forth the eighth of sin."

"So I've got to enchant seven of these sins, come up
with an eighth, and then the Silver Millenium princesses
will die," the Dark Princess focussed on the important parts
to her. "Okay. Magic Mirror, show the one to meet my need,
the first shall be the one of Greed."

"That one wasn't too shabby. Direct and to the point."
The mirror's surface shimmered and showed a girl with short
brown hair walking towards a shrine.

-----------

Grey knew how to do a summoning circle, at least Second
Level. Rei had had to find a compass, his dragonform had
been sufficient to detect ley lines on his own, and the
proper area of the shrine yard had been quickly set up with
spirit wards and a blessing by the fire priestess. The
items: a silver bell, a candle lit from the altar, and a
book (the only thing they'd been able to find close enough
was one of Ami's math books) were used as best Grey could.
(The bell and candle had been easy. The math book on the
other hand...)

As all of them were still under that fealty-spell
(except Usagi who was complaining about feeling left out)
Grey thought he could weave the words of power into the
right pattern by using that as the base.

Except then he'd had to deal with a hysterical Usagi,
and he'd had to re-cast "Life Line" so that she was
included. He had to admit that her argument: that she was
sufficiently unlucky that she'd be a primary target, well,
he'd seen enough cases to prove her point.

"This is going to be tricky," Grey admitted to the
girls, "as i've got to open myself to external influences to
channel this particular one- i don't have the power on my
own for doing more than one item across an extradimensional
rift. If it looks like something BAD is using me, use those
extra spirit wards. Otherwise it'll end with the end of the
spell."

Rei nodded and Grey settled back on his heels, eyes
rolling back as he began chanting. From the fourth line on
there was a sense of Something Else being present.

"Here is where i make my stand,
So now i summon here to hand,
Items of mine own horde,
To give to vassal from their lord,
The scholar needs a magic book,
A gauntlet for the fighting cook,
Another for the domestic one,
A third for princess Amazon,
The fourth to girl who dreams of wealth."

Rei swallowed nervously as the sense of watching
someone else in the boy's skin intensified. The sensation
was of something neither good nor evil, but powerful - very
powerful. Too powerful for her spirit wards. And that smile
was not exactly nice that was showing.

Usagi wasn't Christian but she crossed herself anyway.

Rei frowned and kept herself from stepping back. Some
things ended here. She had seen, and she wasn't interested
in him romantically, but HELL if she was going to just
abandon someone who was trying to help them!

"A rod to help restore one's health,
A shield is for the maiden bright,
Cook and warrior - tempest's rage,
A power shift for esper sage."

Rei gasped as green eyes that would have been more
fitting on a cat looked them all over from Grey's face. She
struggled to go forward and throw spirit wards at this
apparition and free... a friend. Rei surprised herself with
that, but realized it was true. The sometimes-dragon didn't
trust her or anyone else very much at this point, but he was
a friend.

Rei was also pleasantly surprised to see that she wasn't
the only one trying to rush forward and free their ally.

Yet another shock was the thoroughly pleased look on
that now largely feline face, and somehow knowing that their
desire to free the boy was what was pleasing the being.
"Know that to items employ,
Swear allegiance to the boy,
Forevermore your hearts will bind,
But greater joy then you'll find,
As Urd had wanted, and shall twist,
Be loyal once him you've kissed,
Once you accept this of free will,
No force will this Binding kill,
Choose him liege or lover - your choice,
But locked forever once given voice.
Seek to harm or throw him away,
You'll find that binding you'll obey."

"Cut it OUT!" Rei somehow managed to throw a spirit
ward. Which burst into flame halfway to the target. "I *saw*
you, Elder, you've caused most of his problems!"

"Perhaps," hissed the mask of feline features, "but
him getting dumped isn't as funny as it will be if he's
being chased. Still, as you've got a point...

"Something extra now I add,
To make the struggle less so sad,
Transforming triggers and videotapes to find,
That can restructure body and mind.
Just so you know your oath will stay,
Love or friendship, will go both ways."

The presence vanished, the smile being the last thing
to go. Grey blinked a couple of times, then collapsed.

Rei shook her head. "Subtle as a brick through the
window. I guess he's given up on behind-the-scenes nudges.
Makoto? Help me get him in."

"Where are the things he was trying to summon?" Makoto
grabbed the boy's legs and was amazed at how light he was.

"Some are inside, the good stuff will only show if we
make a commitment." Rei sighed as she lifted her end. "Well,
maybe the sacred fire has a few clues."

--------

Kasumi found a package addressed to her in the mail and
spent a moment wondering at it. The return address was
obviously a joke and Kasumi couldn't figure WHO would be
sending her a package. "Valhalla Shipping Company" indeed!

A quick snip and the mystery deepened. A colorful box
depicting some anime version of herself among others. And
there was a boy on the cover as well. The shock was on
reading the back.

"Based on the hilarious crossdimensional martial-arts
mecha-warfare sex comedy by Skysaber."

Kasumi frowned. She couldn't remember ANY such series.
Much less one written by an anime character based on a
series of novels by Ian Fleming!

"Meet Ranma Saotome, a formerly crass martial artist who has
lived one thousand lives trying to find a place to call
home."

Kasumi thought this VERY interesting. A bit too
elaborate for some joke... *click*. A dead fiance returning.
One thousand lives. Fictional characters writing TV series.
"Oh my!"

"In this, the second Mirrors Multiplied movie, Kasumi Tendo
becomes Kasumi Saotome and embarks on an adventure of her
own involving Chinese ghosts, ancient gods, and... her quest
to become a pokemon master?!"

As if on cue, two spheres rolled from inside the
package to drop at Kasumi's feet. She carefully gathered
them up and went to chase her father from the VCR.

THIS she had to see.

-----------

"He's still out of it?" Makoto frowned at the sight.
This was all going too fast.

Ami looked up from where she was examining the patient.
"Looks like he's just exhausted. He appears close enough to
human that the signs are likely the same."

Minako tapped against the table. "How much of that
stuff that went on do you understand?"

"I told you at lunch about what I saw about him. The...
thing... that briefly possessed him was neither good nor
evil. More like some kinda kid." Rei thought for a moment,
arranging the folds of her red and white hakima around her
as she considered. "You know, one kiss from this guy and
suddenly my 'inner princess' is awake and I'm seeing all
sorts of things clearly. Makes me wonder what would happen
if I went back for a second dose."

Ami was shocked. Minako looked thoughtful. Makoto's
expression went flat. Usagi also looked thoughtful, though
it might have just been indigestion.

"I..." Rei's head shot up from where she had been
considering the fallen angel. "Evil approaches. Oh...
Nabiki, how could you?"

"Huh?" Usagi supplied for everyone.

"Nabiki's been possessed by another yoma, it appealed
to her greed. Can't see it too clearly. She's approaching
the office now." Rei frowned. "Well, our guardian angel is
out of it, and danger is approaching. Anyone feel like
taking that oath or kissing the guy?"

"Maybe it's not real? Maybe this is all a trick?"
Makoto got up as the door opened. "Maybe it's..."

The yen-symboled yoma grabbed Makoto's arm. "GOLD
RUSH!"

Seeing her right hand and forearm turn to gold, Makoto
exclaimed rather loudly and tried to get away from what
superficially looked like Nabiki. "Let go! Let go! Somebody
help!" She kicked out at the yoma, only to see a similar
alteration occur at the point of impact.

Gold Rush let go and watched for a moment as golden
stains continued to spread up Makoto's right arm and left
leg. Then she settled on another target.

"Stay away!" Ami's eyes were wild as she found the
transformed Nabiki looking directly at her.

Minako's heart felt like it was going to fly from her
chest at any moment. However, she knew what to do, having
had time to analyze the events transpiring around her.
Quickly, she crossed to the unconscious boy, and leaned down
for a quick kiss. It wasn't her "first kiss" - that had
happened back in England and had been less than inspiring.
She wasn't ready for what occurred however.

Minako had buried a lot of things over the years.
Resentments, grief, despair, past sins and regrets, all
hidden away under her bright and perky exterior.

The skeletons in the closet of one Minako Aino crumbled
to powder and were swept away. Love, forgiveness, a purity
of emotion that she'd never felt before, flooded through her
and left her feeling... awed and shaken somehow. The
princess awoke within her and waited until the flood had
passed before the halves seamlessly joined.

"Noooooo!" Ami's scream, cut short, dissipated the mood.
Minako turned to see that the yoma had touched Ami's chest
and the spreading golden stain had spread past the neck and
shoulders, down to the hips. A glance at Makoto showed that
half of her face was about all that was left, and even as
Minako watched the other eye changed to gold that stared
sightlessly at her.

Usagi tried to dive for the door and was grabbed by
those long ponytails.

Minako's chin firmed. A vow was needed, eh? She needed a
choice, and to use an appropriate phrase.

"Of my own free will, and knowing that this is eternally
binding, I choose to pledge love." Minako blinked and looked
at Rei, having heard the same words coming forth at the same
time. Rei blinked back, not having foreseen THAT.

Gold Rush shrieked as she was thrown off the struggling
Usagi by the sudden torrent of energy inside the shrine's
office.

"Minako?" Ami said, eyes staring just before her mouth
altered to gold.

Minako piroutted inside a column of light. Feeling again
sweeping pleasure that seemed to shape her within and
without. Vaguely aware that a second column of light was
nearby. When she landed, she knew just what to do.

The shared lifeforce increased dramatically, and Minako
knew that all she had to do was flex a little mental switch
and a shield of light would appear. Grey/Ranma was primarily
a builder and healer. Minako was a defender.

Rei merely continued floating in midair, a violet aura
springing up as her esper abilities came into bright focus.

Minako wasn't a Senshi, so no sentai speeches or poses.
She summoned forth a golden shield and interposed herself
between the yoma and the remaining prey.

Rei's eyes glowed. The table lifted itself and rammed
the yoma, carrying Gold Rush outside.

"Gurkh?!" Gold Rush looked a little fearfully at the
purple glowing figure hovering in midair, her hair extending
out all around her. AND at the girl with the shield. Not
good. There was still the shrine office though, and if they
were trying to keep her out then there must be something
valuable in there! "RUSH!"

A blur entered the shrine office, narrowly avoiding a
telekinetic blast and containment within a forcefield.

There was some guy in her way, but Gold Rush knew how
to deal with that! The Kiss Of Death!

---------

"Nobody does it better
Makes me feel sad for the rest
Nobody does it half as good as you
Baby, you're the best."

Kasumi's eyes were in the process of bugging. It was
mainly similar to the beginning of the sixth "Skysaber"
movie, with the main difference being the names on the
titles. Well, that and it was anime and not live-action.

"I wasn't looking
But somehow you found me
I tried to hide from your love light
But like heaven above me
The spy who loved me
Is keeping all my secrets safe tonight."

It was, as Kasumi recalled, the same tune as from the
Skysaber movie. Same images of women, cars, guns, but no
Nerd Toy. And the ads at the beginning had indicated that
there were SEVEN movies, a long running TV series, and an
'online' club (whatever that was).

"And nobody does it better
Though sometimes I wish someone could
Nobody does it quite the way you do
Why'd you have to be so good..."

And what was the "Otherverse" series and how did it tie
into THIS series? Kasumi was an otaku, in heart if not in
practice, and questions like this came naturally to her. As
naturally as wondering if she'd ever get to do cosplay -
THAT costume looked interesting.

"The way that you hold me
Whenever you hold me
There's some kind of magic inside you
That keeps me from running
But just keep it coming
How'd you learn to do the things you do?"

Well, just the production values had indicated that
this wasn't some elaborate hoax. (Though WHO would bother
playing a trick on a lonely old maid such as herself,
nineteen and fettered to the house by duty and
responsibility, was beyond Kasumi's kenning.) Kasumi was
somewhat familiar with the old Sherlock Holmes quote and was
faced with the impossible being the actual explanation.

"And nobody does it better
Makes me feel sad for the rest
Nobody does it half as good as you
Baby, baby, darling you're the best"

Kasumi leaned forward with a gasp. That was...
HERSELF! Little white frilly apron, happily humming as she
dusted shelves and straightened up objects. That was NABIKI
coming in to tell her that she needed to get ready for the
wedding!

Kasumi watched as the wedding took place, hands
clenched in front of her. And among the wedding gifts were
two spheres of red and white.

------------

Black vapors streaming out of her, Gold Rush reverted to
the being she had been before.

Nabiki Tendo found herself kissing someone as the
monstrous presence dissipated. It was her fabled "First
Kiss" and she was finding that the rumors and gossip weren't
accurate at all. If anything they hadn't even scratched the
surface.

An icy blast slammed through her, setting up all
*sorts* of interesting reactions and leaving trails of
pleasure behind. She felt the avalanche go through her, the
cold finding her every nook and cranny and cleansing her
within and without.

Nabiki had made a number of mistakes in life, and had
done things that even she had not been proud of. Her boss,
the shrine priestess, would have especially been mortified
by some of Nabiki's deep dark secrets. Now she felt them
scoured away, forgiven, as if her soul had been stained and
was now as sparklingly clean as fresh driven snow.

Shot through the shivering pleasure of the cold was
love and caring and compassion. A particularly bad incident
in her past came to mind, and Nabiki nearly cried at the
disappointment she felt amidst that caring, then elation as
that too was cleansed and scrubbed and forgiven.

The source of all this made a move as if to escape
the embrace, but Nabiki would be among the first to admit
she was a greedy girl. She fastened on with all her
strength, pressing harder with her mouth and probing with
her tongue as she sought to intensify the experience. She
had a brief moment where pleasure exploded within her, and
Nabiki felt as if the world itself were not too high a price
for this to continue.

At which point Rei and Minako firmly wrestled Nabiki
OFF their boyfriend.

Nabiki got a look at the stunned and startled boy
that had (per her father) come back from the grave to honor
an agreement that he marry a member of her family.
Completely unused to the sort of things that had just
happened to her, Nabiki fainted.

Rei and Minako looked at the girl who was grinning
in her sleep and came to the conclusion that this was a BAD
sign.

Nabiki murmurred in her sleep. "Why yes, Ranma-sama,
I'll be your love-slave."

Rei and Minako looked at each other. This was a VERY
bad sign.

---------

Noting that Kasumi was engrossed in another of her
weird tapes, Soun smiled indulgently and moved to answer the
door. He'd get Kasumi married off to someone nice and
down-to-earth and she'd settle down out of this silliness.
Maybe he should call that fellow... what was his name? Oh
yes, Tamiya. Soun nodded, sure that the janitor's son would
make a fine husband for Kasumi!

And then he had the perfect choice for Nabiki. Kentaro
Kurenai was SURE to have produced a son worthy of Nabiki!
He'd called last week, so maybe Tsubasa Kurenai had already
arrived to make his little girl happy!

And there was an even better one for Akane! She was
always insulting and muttering under her breath about that
Tatewaki fellow. So many sparks, it MUST be love!

Instead of someone that he would expect, like Tsubasa
Kurenai, there was a panda at the door looking thoroughly
miserable.

"Hmmmm. Circus must in town." Soun looked about but
couldn't find any sign of the trainer.

"Growf!" The sign held by the panda was waved back and
forth in an attempt to gain Soun Tendo's attention. [Hi
Tendo. Any hot water?]

---------

Sash was left behind, she had gone into an anime store,
come out and had promptly dived into a Manga No Mori. Nobody
expected to see her for DAYS at least. (A little image of
her leaping bodily into a bin of unsorted manga and swimming
about in it pretty much summed up what everyone expected of
the otaku.)

Tigar was the best tracker of the Nichieju.
Unfortunately the change in climate had given her a raspy
cough and she was lagging far behind as a result.

Sugar, Tigar's older sister, had chosen to stay behind.

Spice, Sugar's shieldmaid and rival, had accidently
fallen down from a roof and had landed rather poorly. She
had also discovered that the Japanese could be really
hostile towards strange women who fell into a crepe maker's
cart. She'd beaten the odd man and his explosive pancakes,
but was nearly as slowed by her injuries as Tigar was by
illness.

Cayenne and Salt had fallen to their old rivalry, and
both had knocked the other off the bridge. Landing in a
garbage barge that had been heading out to sea at the time.

Talcum, White Wing, Sabre, and Towel had likewise met
with misadventures. (A motorcycle delivery boy, a tourist,
crosstown traffic, and being knocked onto the top of a
bullet-train for example.) (Resulting in a crashed
motorcycle, a marriage, several smashed cars, and a motion
sick Amazon, in that order.)

Shampoo eyed her remaining rivals with some concern.
There was Mace, an Amazon who preferred other women but who
had stated her intention to take Mousse and make him into a
proper French maid (including outfit) some time ago. Shampoo
knew that Mace was just in this race because of orders from
her clan head and a certain degree of competitiveness.

There was the kind, if somewhat ditzy, Azure. Also
clumsy, incredibly strong, and a disgrace to the Amazon name
when it came to opponents like mice. A tonfa user, though
she was also pretty good with warfans. Strict HTH, well,
Shampoo didn't think much of her fighting skills at all. If
Azure caught the boy, then Shampoo thought she might as well
give up being an Amazon because Azure as a clan leader
sounded like a disaster.

There was also Dowel, Hook, Patch, Horseradish,
Sweetums, Fumika, Parsley, Sage, Rosemary, and Thyme.
Shampoo didn't think any of THAT group had a chance, and
expected most to fall when they hit these mountains.

Shampoo doubled her speed on hearing an evil laugh
behind her. Praying all the while that she had NOT heard "We
steal Shampoo's happiness! Over."

------------

Nabiki looked tenderly at her True Love. There was no
doubt in her mind. This was HER fiance! The two houses WOULD
be joined. She'd tattoo her name on that butt yet! That is,
if she could get out of this telekinetic bubble.

Rei shot Nabiki a dirty look, indicating she HAD heard
that thought. She briefly considered giving Nabiki nosebleed
from a sudden altitude increase. No, it wasn't Nabiki's
fault and she'd probably calm down after awhile.

Minako considered beating them over the head. "Guys!
This is NOT the time for settling property disputes!"

Ranma (as that was his role, he decided to start
referring to himself that way) winced. As expected, he was
seen as a resource. No doubt Nabiki was planning ways of
selling him off, Rei as additional revenue for the shrine,
and Minako... well he still wasn't sure why SHE had glomped
him. Maybe she was just being friendly. "I don't understand
this. In the anime and stuff, as soon as the villain was
defeated everything always went back to normal."

*thunk* *thunk* Rei knocked lightly on Makoto's
forehead. "Solid. She's gold all the way through. Ami, blink
twice if you understand me."

Ami's eyes followed Rei's movements but she didn't
blink in response to the question.

Minako looked over the mask of flesh in what was
otherwise another gold statue. "I think with her ears and
everything changed like that she probably isn't able to hear
you. How is she breathing, anyway?"

Usagi whimpered. SHE could get free, but she'd have
less than a quarter inch of hair left. As she couldn't lift
the weight of her transformed hair, and wasn't willing to go
around quite yet with a Marine cut, she was left lying on a
few cushions.

"i don't have a 'Gold To Flesh' spell," confessed
Ranma. "A wizard might be able to use Polymorph Other -
change the gold to stone, then use a Stone To Flesh. As i'm
a cleric, most of my spells are restorative or divinational
in nature - not transformative."

Rei frowned but couldn't see any way around it. "Kiss
them."

"WHAT?!" Minako, Ranma, and Nabiki chorused with
degrees of shock.

"Look, you're an angel, sort of," Rei started blushing
furiously. He didn't know WHAT his kisses did, and would
probably flee when he found out. So she'd help keep him
ignorant for now. "Which is the closest thing we've got to a
'handsome prince' available unless you think we can get the
Imperial Palace to loan us one."

Minako glanced at the solid gold coffee table. "We
could probably BUY one..."

Nabiki took her eye off the 'future father of her
children' long enough to estimate the value of the gold.
"Rent one, definitely. That's got to be about one-hundred
fifty pounds. Don't know about purchasing..." ~Certainly
enough for one *heck* of a honeymoon.~

"Since they're both princesses of that 'Moon Kingdom'
thing, it ought to work, right?" Rei tried not to look both
embarassed and jealous.

Minako frowned thoughtfully. Maybe she could get
injured and need some serious cuddling later. "Got to do it,
I think the lack of air is getting to Ami-chan."

"i've got a bad feeling about this," Ranma said,
moving closer to Ami.

"Unless you've got something better?" Rei realized
that was a lemon thought and quickly squeezed it. She also
noticed how hesitant the boy was. "I mean, unless you've got
a spell. And you better make it a REAL kiss. You might not
get a second chance."

Ami's eyes bugged slightly more than they had as
'Ranma' gently kissed her. She closed those eyes as she felt
life return to her lips and spread outward from the point of
contact. Skin that had been frozen in midstretch settled
into place again, the cold of metal replaced with the warmth
of living flesh. Air starved lungs drew breath as the
stiffness faded from them. She felt and heard her heartbeat
start again, and tears began in her eyes as she felt life
begin to flow through her limbs.

"Okay, she's done, now do something about ME!"
Usagi's limbs flailed about as she tried to see what was
going on. She saw Ami's hair turn blue, even if she couldn't
see the rest of her without someone to help lift her head
up.

Ami knew she was NOT done, her legs were still areas
of numbness, and responded to the hesitation. This was her
First Kiss, something she had heard about but never thought
about that much. Now that it was literally a Kiss Of Life,
she fastened on hungrily.

"Mmmmfff!" Ranma was expressing his surprise that a shy
bookworm was pressing herself on him to the extent that this
girl was.

Minako waited until the last bit of metallic look faded
from Ami's shoes. "Okay, Ami-chan, time to let go."

Rei waited a few moments more, noting Ranma's struggles
to free himself. "Ami?"

Minako and Rei looked at each other and sighed, finally
forcibly prying Ami off of Ranma. "Makoto next?" Minako
asked.

"Right."

---------

She answered the phone wearily, but her demeanor
changed almost immediately. "Are you sure, Goemon?"

"I would not have called if I were not," said her
brother in that terse manner he had.

"Then it worked," breathed Nodoka Ishikawa, formerly
Nodoka Saotome. "The scroll worked."

"Perhaps," conceded Goemon Ishikawa. "There may be
another explanation yet to be revealed."

"Perhaps," agreed Nodoka after a moment. "This
certainly isn't how it was *supposed* to work. It will have
to do. There is merely the matter of tying him to this plane
by the proper methods."

"Hmmm. Well in that case, your ex-husband is said to be
in the Furinkan area of Nerima. You might renew your
acquaintance at the same time."

"There is that possibility, isn't there?" Nodoka
glanced towards her katana. "No, the important thing is my
son. Now I must use the other scrolls to see what can be
done."

"Hmmph. Watch yourself. Genma's always been a tricky
one."

"Compared to YOUR employer? Hardly. It was nice
speaking to you, my brother."

---------

He had been alive forty years as a mortal, another
forty years (subjectively - when time travel and compression
was involved things got tricky) working for the RRO and
occasionally the ODI (Office of Divine Intervention before
its merger with the Department of Divine Justice.) He'd
visited over one hundred timelines and seen ten times that.

Sometimes he wondered if he would EVER understand
women.

Ranma (Grey) decided that maybe that was why he'd liked
that Vulcan girl he'd worked with during that mission in
Federation space. They'd hit it off fairly well, allowing
for the fact that he'd owned toasters with more personality.
She had at least been logical, and one had a reasonable
chance of predicting her actions and responses. Well, except
for that one month every seven years, but compared to human
women...

Ranma scratched his head and tried to figure out what
was going on. He'd returned Usagi and Makoto to normal after
he'd changed Ami back. And then, he'd been gently but firmly
shoved out the door by a number of girls who he had THOUGHT
had wanted him around. Except that it had looked like there
was some hostility between Rei and Minako and Nabiki.

Now, from the sound of giggling, muted discussion, and
the occasional clink of ceramic, they were having a tea
party.

One of these days, Grey hoped, someone in some Reality
would come up with a spell or program or book that would
allow a guy to have a reasonable chance of understanding the
unfair sex. That someone, if they survived, would be so
fantastically wealthy that even Fleece would be intimidated.

Ranma glanced at the door from where he had been
sitting. Maybe he'd just been abandoned again? He'd thought
they were getting to be friends at least, but he'd certainly
been wrong about such things before. The more he thought on
it, the more likely that the whole thing was just some kind
of misunderstanding. Nope, some girl(s) caring if HE lived
or died. No way.

Dusting his trousers off, Ranma let his wings manifest
and spread them. There were other things he could be doing
until he met the Tendos tomorrow afternoon. Just trying to
figure out what this timeline was, and what was going on...

Greed demons? That was straight out of that "Angel 1/2"
timeline, where the Seven Deadly Sins had been possessing
spirits turned loose by something Happosai had done years
ago. Then there'd been the "Panda that ate Nerima" - where
Genma had been possessed by Gluttony.

Ranma picked up speed after flying past the trees of
the Shrine, still deep in thought. There were patterns from
one timeline to another. In a LOT of timelines, if there was
a Ranma whose father was Genma whose sensei had been
Happosai, then you had the Tendo-Saotome engagement, you had
Ukyo being dumped for her dowry, and you had Shampoo getting
involved in some manner. Sometimes Ranma married Akane,
sometimes Nabiki, sometimes Kasumi or Ukyo or Megumi. Rarely
Shampoo, once Minako, another time Makoto, and he'd even
seen once where Ranma had ended up happily married to
Belldandy.

Still, patterns tended to emerge. Nine out of ten
Ranmas had some of the same problems, a lack of social
skills or other problems from a bad upbringing. In some
timelines he mainly compensated for them.

And THIS Ranma knew, that in the vast majority of
timelines where there was a Ranma Saotome and there was an
Akane Tendo: the two would get into a sparring match or
grudge fight on the first day they met. Second, that he
hadn't run across a timeline yet where the first impression
given the Tendo household didn't lock everyone in a reaction
loop that would dominate their relationships for years to
come.

So, Ranma gave it some thought as he flew out of town,
knowing that he'd have to show up. He'd have to fight Akane,
and he'd be pigeonholed for the rest of his stay in Nerima
based on the events of the next afternoon.

Unfortunately, Ranma was SO deep in thought over this
that he forgot to restore his Cloaking spell.

-------

Rei held up a hand, interrupting Makoto's speculation
that if a kiss did THAT then what would...

"Damn him," Rei said softly into the intervening
silence. "He's gone flying off in his little cloud of
despair, absolutely certain that he's alone and Fated to
pain."

"What?! No way!" Nabiki put the little bottle of
polish down. "He's that clueless?"

"MEN!" Minako, Nabiki, Makoto, and Rei said
simultaneously as if it were a favorite swear word.

"Can't give us the chance to work this out, oh no."
Minako let out a puff of breath. "Where's he going,
Reichan?"

"Looks like that camp he set up outside Tokyo." Rei
closed her eyes so she could more clearly picture her
target. "Yeah, that's it."

"Maybe we should go visit? A campsite, at night, by a
campfire..." Minako's eyes turned distant. Maybe a cold
night and some warm snuggling?

"We can't do that, we have to concern ourselves with
studying."

Everyone looked at Ami. Having *known* she would say
that.

"Well, tomorrow afternoon he's going to be at MY
place," purred Nabiki. "At which point he becomes MY
fiance."

~We'll just see about that,~ thought two other girls
simultaneously.

Makoto decided for a change of subject. "Okay, when
he kissed us it awoke our 'Silver Millenium memories' and
cured our transformations. Then you, Rei, and Minako pledged
love and got those gifts. Am I right so far?"

"Yes, that's it." Rei nodded. "My esper abilities
were expanded but feeding me a lot of useless information.
Now I've got it all under layers of control, plus
telekinesis and pyrokinesis. The feline thing we saw earlier
is under the impression that his victim 'Ranma' will
continue to live in interesting times and anyone near him
has to have some abilities to survive all that."

"I can form forcefields and barriers!" Minako
gestured and formed the "default" round shield on her arm.

"Hmmmm, pledge love and get a powerup?" Nabiki
smirked at the thought.

"Or service. Something about the way it was stated
made me think of samurai to their daimyo or something like
that." Makoto tapped her nails on the table, which caused
them all to consider the massive hunk of gold.

"Liege-lord kinda thing?" Nabiki snorted. Well, she
could see herself as a Royal Accountant. And if the first
such 'adventure' had produced a gold table and two solid
gold cushions that had not been changed back... "So if I
pledged both love and service would I get TWO gifts?"

There was much considering of that concept. Minako got
an odd smile on her face as she pictured herself as a golden
knight ready to smite evil doers in the name of love and
justice! Rei pondered that her life had been saved twice now
by this sometimes-Ranma, and that was a heck of a debt to
pay.

Makoto drew a deep breath. She had *serious*
reservations about this, but with her 'inner princess'
awakened all she had was increased strength and a resistance
to electrical attacks. If she was going to protect her
friends, she had to go at least part way. Besides, she'd
gotten to know this 'Ranma' a bit and everything so far
she'd seen was that he was 'Mostly Harmless' - unless you
happened to be trying to kill Rei, that is.

Usagi pondered. Where was her Prince? The memories she'd
glimpsed had featured a handsome prince Endymion. She needed
a powerup if she was going to find him, but she couldn't
pledge either because she was a PRINCESS! What to do?

Nabiki pondered as well. Everything cost something. Even
if it was "free" there was time or effort involved. Despite
that incredibly addictive set of sensations, Nabiki's
instincts were to "bargain shop." She wanted to check the
fine print before making any commitments.

------------

Kasumi glanced from the screen to the ball she'd been
toying with. The plastic seal threaded through, that had two
phrases written on it. Over the two phrases was another
simple sentence. If she wanted to open the sphere and gain
whatever was inside, all she had to do was say the phrase.

Kasumi (onscreen): "Oh dear! Pokeball, go!" *SHOOM!*
Tasmanian Devil (onscreen): "Wak oohm eek ack!"
Kasumi (onscreen): "Actually, if you'd take Akane out of
your mouth now..."
Taz (onscreen): "Oopsum. Sowwy."
Akane (onscreen): "Aaaaghhhh! I got Taz slobber all over me
again! Ick! Ick! MMMMMMF!"
Taz (onscreen): "Glabbel greek ook ooku ick."
Kasumi (onscreen): "Well, yes, she IS quieter that way. Now,
Taz, Akane's been cooking again, and we need someone to
clean up the mess."
Taz (still onscreen): Ptooie! "Yum." *spin. zoom.*

Kasumi looked towards the kitchen as Akane's voice
called from inside. "Ah! Don't burn! Don't burn!"

Kasumi fingered the pokeball and spoke thoughtfully.
"Well, as long as he isn't evil or insane, and as long as
I'm engaged to marry him anyway... and if he's interested in
cosplay or manga or anime... and if he's kind... I could
*try* to love him."

The pokeball snapped open. "Vulpix?!"

Kasumi smiled. "HOW CUTE!" She reached for the other
one and opened it as well.

"Bweek ook ak?"

Kasumi nodded with a little smile. "In the kitchen."

*Spin. Zoom.*

"WHAT?! HEY! STOP! I just made that! Ahhhh! MMmmmmfffff
mmmfff mmmmM!"

Kasumi giggled as the little tornado shot out of the
kitchen to stand in front of her and give her a sloppy
salute. The kicking house slippers sticking out of his mouth
completed the image.

"MMMMMFFFFFF!"

"Bwak geeeb gau rawf spzzz!"

"Why certainly, Mr Taz. You just go ahead and give her
a nice bath." Kasumi's smile turned up a notch as the
tornado headed towards the bathroom. It was certainly good
to have a tidy pokemon.

Especially if her beloved was coming tomorrow.

---------

This timeline has:
Soun Tendo - who has engaged the daughters who do NOT
marry Ranma to his dread master Happosai. You know how
easily he caves into his Master's whims. Regretting this,
and having heard of Ranma's death, he has also engaged them
to a lot of others. Each one worse than the canon Ranma.
Kasumi Tendo - a housewifely otaku dying of loneliness.
Nabiki Tendo - a checkered past and history of using
people, her job at the shrine was just another scheme.
Akane Tendo - essentially unchanged until the Chem Club
attack. Thereafter, she is shunned by her classmates and
society.
The Senshi - civilian identities only. Beryl did not
survive her confrontation with Queen Serenity and the newly
dead citizens sent forward in time without their powers or
advisors.
Genma - knowing Ranma is dead, has adopted another son
who was promising in the martial arts. Was turned into a
panda, then a horse, then back to being a panda.
Ukyo and Shampoo - mainly unchanged.
Nodoka - has made some pretty bizarre plans after
Ranma's reported death. Divorced Genma after he returned
home without her son. Oh, and just to be different from the
number of fics where Nodoka is a Masaki, here she's an
Ishikawa.

-----------------------------
http://metroanime.home.mindspring.com/
metro...@mindspring.com
""Tsk. You Americans, your women are encouraged
to live up to a standard, while your men are encouraged
to live down to another."
- Kasumi Tendo, "Supersoldier"

"The loudest voice is often the most
incorrect."
- Grey, "reluctant bet"

"I don't want to be any trouble."
-Anakin Skywalker, aka Darth Vader
Star Wars episode 1