[Ranma][FanFic] Omake Theatre: Worse Parent Than Genma part 4-5
metro...@mindspring.com
these are being sent on my last day online. Hope they amuse.
OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE
"I am *not* Genma Saotome, nor will I portray him even in a simulation."
"...but..." The black cat looked inquiringly up at the old man.
"NO. Do you have *any* idea how dangerous my life is?"
"...but..."
"I've raised kids before you know. Can't you get Drizzt to do it?"
"Why are you bringing *me* into this conversation, old man?"
"How about I give both of you a major magic item and a promise of no
interference for a hundred years?" Toltiir asked the two.
The drow ranger looked tempted by the possibility of an Elder god of
mischief being out of his hair for a century. Not that he had many funny
slapstick adventures, but it didn't help his image to have to deal with
"wackiness" or the like. "Joint custody? How about some of those Arrows Of
Sunlight. Those *could* come in handy. No. Probably not."
"*Absolutely* not. Do you know how many heroes I've sponsored since Myth
Drannor?" Elminster frowned. "There is no way I'm taking on an apprentice at
my age."
"Well, neither of *them* could do nearly the job I could anyway," added
another.
Elminster and Drizzt glared at the newcomer. Neither really wanted to try
and raise Ranma from the pit of cats and try to overcome Genma's influence.
There was a little pride involved, however. "Prove it!"
---------
Yet Another Worse Father Than Genma? A continuing omake by gregg sharp.
DISCLAIMER: Characters are by other people. Ranma 1/2 by Rumiko Takahashi.
Elminster, Drizzt Do'Urden and the Forgotten Realms are by Ed Greenwood and
TSR. Toltiir is by Toltiir.
---------
Ranma screamed. He screamed in pain. He screamed in fear. He screamed in
just plain old desire not to be thrown back in the pit.
The Catfist training was a turning point for Ranma Saotome in a number of
ways.
Prior to the Catfist he had doubts about blindly following his father's
dictums. Prior to the Catfist he remembered that he had a mother. Prior to
the Catfist he was still able to function as a multi-layered human being.
Prior to the Catfist Ranma Saotome was not exclusively devoted to the
martial arts.
After the Catfist Ranma would go on to excel in pride and arrogance,
eschewing all other activities than martial arts. After the Catfist Ranma
would forget his mother and other people would come to touch his heart less
and less. He would close his ability to care for others, it was a tough
world and unforgiving - full of cruelty designed to make one stronger. Pain
was there to make one stronger.
So, as Genma got ready to throw his son into a pit of hungry cats for the
second time, it was an excellent time for an interruption.
Genma threw the screaming child into the pit and turned to where he had put
the bottle of sake. He was hoping the stupid boy would hurry up and learn
the unbeatable manuever and...
Genma stopped. He couldn't actually have seen what he *thought* he saw,
could he?
The obese Saotome patriarch turned around and cautiously peered into the
bottom of the pit.
Except the bottom of the pit didn't seem to actually be there.
Genma even more cautiously went to the edge of pit and stared for a few
moments more before he finally summed it up. "My god, it's full of stars..."
----------
Genma began wandering after that. While he had watched the floor had
reappeared. No cats. No Ranma.
His reason for wandering was quite simple.
He couldn't face a regular job. He was firmly convinced that anything
approaching real work was demeaning to a man of his nature. Genma was also
quite uncertain of what to do now as his plans had been developed and set
for years.
First he would dump his wife and responsibilities to train Ranma to be a
superior martial artist. Then he would go off to his old buddy Soun, marry
Ranma off to one of those daughters, the son and daughter would then operate
the dojo and lead to Genma's long and comfortable retirement.
No son. Therefore no ten years of training, therefore no marriage, therefore
no comfortable retirement. Therefore Genma had to go back to his wife and
get a job. Providing she didn't kill him or require seppuku.
This was clearly not acceptable.
So Genma had eventually found a nice bar where he was on his fourth bottle
of sake, trying to come up with a way of compensating for a son who had
vanished.
The best ideas he'd come up with so far had been: a) just going off and
forgetting about this and starting over again with a new wife and child; b)
a replacement Ranma; c) going to visit his old buddy Soun and divorce Nodoka
and marry one of Soun's daughters. So far "C" was beginning to look quite
appealing and it would unite the two families.
"Ah, Mister Saotome," said a woman sliding into the barstool next to Genma.
Genma blinked. This wasn't a bill collector was she? She certainly wasn't
dressed for a seedy bar in downtown Kobe.
"I was wondering if a deal could be made between you and I regarding your
son," the woman said to him, then spoke to barkeep. "Tea, green, hot."
Genma considered as he reached for bottle #5. He didn't *have* Ranma, Ranma
was *gone*. The entire pit have been filled with a deep darkness and lots of
stars. When the strange image had passed there had been no Ranma so it
wasn't like he was doing anything *wrong* by selling Ranma. He'd sold Ranma
off before anyway so it wasn't a big deal. "Well, my son is very valuable."
"For the next ten years I'm interested in training your son to be a sort of
bodyguard to a very important individual," the woman said quietly but
somehow over the noise of the bar.
"Ah, well he can't neglect his studies in the martial arts," said Genma.
"Very important."
"I'm willing to pay a considerable sum," said the woman, regarding him
briefly with the most unnerving reddish eyes.
"How much?"
The woman reached into her purse and withdrew a small stack of papers.
"You'll find the pertinent figures there on the first page."
"Well, I don't know my boy is... SOLD!" Genma quickly looked for the line to
sign on. He didn't have the boy anyway and he could at least get this woman
to pay his bar tab.
The woman seemed amused as Genma signed and pressed his hanko into the
appropriate places. "Fine. Fine. Here's the payment in full."
Genma's eyes popped as the woman lifted an attache case and set it in front
of Genma. He couldn't believe his luck! By the time this idiot woman
realized he didn't have Ranma he'd be long gone. "Uhm, so. I guess I'll
bring Ranma by here tomorrow."
The woman had already drank her tea and gotten up, looking back over her
shoulder at the portly man. "Oh, I've already taken possession of the
merchandise."
"Fine, fine," said Genma, not really paying attention as he popped the case
open.
"Well, we witnessed it," said one of the young men nearby, getting up to
leave with the woman.
"First time I've seen an engagement arrangement work so smoothly," said
another.
"Huh?" Genma said, suddenly beginning to realize that something was wrong as
photographers snapped photos and he realized someone had videotaped the
whole proceeding. Well, let them. He'd outsmarted all of them.
"Genma Saotome?"
Genma shut the case slowly having recognized that voice. Slowly he turned.
This crowd of people he did recognize. He'd stolen from most of them. Oh
dear.
------
10 years later:
Soun snipped the envelope, wondering why someone would send him a videotape.
He put it in and immediately wept with joy to see his old friend Genma on
there. His old friend... wait a minute. Soun turned the sound up.
Almost sleepwalking, he went back to the package and pulled out the photos
and laid them aside. The thirty page legal document drew his attention.
"GENMAAAAAAAAA!"
----------
Nodoka wondered why someone would send her a videotape.
She watched it, rewound it, played it again. There was really only one thing
she could say about this.
"Where's my sharpening stone?"
--------
Genma, currently breaking rocks in a Japanese prison for repeated petty
theft and assault on a police officer, felt a chill go down his back and
thanked the kami he was in a nice safe prison under an assumed name.
--------
Setsuna Meiou merely smiled as she looked over her own copy of the document.
Which stated, among other things, that the contract superceded all previous
negotiations and rendered them null and void. That basically, if the
contract was broken by Genma, she would have ended up owning the Saotome
family assets down to the last nickel and putting them into debt beyond
their ability to pay.
Ranma continued to flow through a complicated kata from where he was, not
concerned.
He'd read the contract years ago and seen the tape. His father had sold him
off. Ranma had come to terms with those events.
In the meantime he'd trained long and hard for what he knew to be an
important job.
Yojimbo. Bodyguard. An old and noble profession, one that many ronin had
undertaken over many years. He had a new clan and had been trained by some
of the best of the best.
He still had to meet the Tendos, apparently Meiou-oneechan felt that it was
important to personally apologize for the oversight of his father. He was
tempted to bring his iinazuke along, but that might cause problems.
Finishing by drawing ki in from his surroundings to replenish the energy
he'd expended, Ranma readied himself for the coming confrontation.
-------
Nabiki held the door open as she looked over this stranger come calling.
Tall, with a lithe muscular look that bespoke of a career in gymnastics or
martial arts. This guy wasn't cute, he instead had the sort of lean roguish
good looks that could have made a fortune in the modeling business. "Uhm,
hello."
"Good evening, Miss. I am here to speak with Soun Tendo," said the youth,
bowing formally and politely.
Nabiki looked over the guy some more, enjoying what she was seeing. Not only
was he built quite attractively, but he was dressed pretty nicely too.
"Daddy is..." How to say that her father was a blubbering wreck?
"I understand," said the youth. "It is regarding that matter I wished to
speak with him."
"Oh my," said Kasumi as she arrived. "A guest. I'm sorry but Father isn't
really up to visitors right now."
"Ah, you're the eldest daughter?" On seeing her nod, the youth bowed again.
"In that case, I tender my deepest apologies to you as representitive of
your father. My name is Ranma Saotome."
There was a brief moment of silence, broken a moment later by the trampling
of feet as the Tendo patriarch lunged for the door.
Unfortunately, Kasumi and Nabiki were still occupying the door.
*CRASH* *TRAMPLE!*
"Oops." "Ouch." "Owie."
Ranma looked down at the tangle. "Uhm, should I get a doctor?"
--------
"This is Kasumi, she's 20. This is Nabiki, she's 18. This is Akane, she's
17."
"This is Ranma," said Ranma, "who is already engaged. You've got a copy of
the contract."
"The Tendo arrangement predates that one," began Soun again.
"While this one specifically states it takes precedence over all
pre-existing ones," said Ranma in a perfectly reasonable tone. "Besides, me
and Mako-chan get along really well."
"B-b-b-but?!" Soun privately cursed Genma for not being here.
Akane was mollified somewhat. This boy wasn't trying to get engaged and was
sincerely not interested. She had enough trouble with Tatewaki Kuno, who had
finally gone all out and beaten her and was now insisting that they were
engaged. The thing was, as soon as Kuno had offered money to her father, the
engagement had been formalized pending only one thing. This boy was her last
chance to avoid the engagement to Tatewaki Kuno.
Nabiki had slowly lost interest. She'd love the chance to get out of Nerima
but she'd be going off to a college in Juuban soon anyway.
Kasumi looked over the boy with a certain interest. Doctor Tofu had moved
away halfway through the year, still unable to bring himself to any sort of
coherency in her presence. He wasn't interested in gaining a fiancee, which
was a pity, but certainly nothing she could affect. Still it was worth a
moment of pleasant fantasy. Nabiki would be off to college soon, and then
Akane possibly. Then she'd be free. Free to do what was a good question.
Ranma shrugged helplessly. "I'm just here to apologize on behalf of my
birth-father. I've got quite a full day ahead of me so I'll just be going."
"B-b-b-but..." Soun desperately sought for something to say that would keep
the boy here.
--------
"So you see, I make a better father than Genma," declared Sailor Pluto as
the on-screen Ranma fled. "Ranma is a trained martial artist and bodyguard
of the Princess - so he's got a career."
"Akane ends up being kidnapped by Kodachi for 'bridal training' for her
brother," noted Bast. "Looks uncomfortable."
"Makoto Kino gets a sempai and a fiance she can keep, Ranma gets a girl who
can understand him and who enjoys cooking." Toltiir nodded. "It's a good
match: they have enough in common for common ground but not so much that
they're competing in everything. With overlapping duties, they mesh well
professionally and personally even with his occasional lapses into foot in
mouth disease."
"Soun doesn't give up on the Tendo marriage concept," pointed out Bast.
"Akane may be out of the running, and Nabiki is off at college, that leaves
one daughter he can push towards Ranma. Looks like she doesn't do too well
as a seductress - gets too embarassed too easily."
"I have trouble with this image of you as a matchmaker, Pluto." Toltiir
looked towards the Senshi of Time. "You don't seem quite the sort. Venus I
could see."
Sailor Pluto shrugged slightly. "Why do I always have to be the mysterious
no-fun by-the-book manipulative sort? Can't I engage in something where
people are happier at the end of the game?"
"It's just... odd," admitted Bast.
"AH!" Toltiir pounced as he selected a scene. "Oh HO."
Bast repeatedly blinked, then grinned. "Ah HAH."
Pluto colored slightly and tried to look dignified.
"Gave yourself a lemon scene, did you?" Toltiir smirked. "Romantic subplot
and kids and the whole nine yards, eh?"
Pluto shrugged again. "Hey. Nobody said I couldn't have fun, did they?"
====================
"A *Worse* Father Than Genma?" Raideen asked, wanting to make sure he'd
heard right. "Or do you mean a *Better* Father Than Genma?"
"It sort of altered as it went along," admitted Toltiir. "People like Sailor
Pluto whom you'd expect to be poor parents, and they're doing a better job
than the original father: Genma Saotome."
Hesta clucked softly. "I think altering the three Tendo girls would be more
interesting. Their mother's death alters the three. The oldest tries to
become the perfect Japanese housewife, like her mother. The middle goes into
a moneyhungry mercenary possessive mode where everything is seen in terms of
profit. The youngest is a creature of passionate rage and self-absorbed ego.
How easy it would be to alter it so that the kernel that forms the basis for
their later development shifted to another focus."
"Maybe some other time," Toltiir said, though admitting that Hesta's idea
had some merit. The idea of a Kasumi who was off at college or work when
Ranma arrived, or a Nabiki who was a rabid manga artist/fangirl, or an Akane
who was studying to be a concert pianist - it had some definite appeal.
"With the test point being when Ranma meets the Tendos for the first time,"
said Raideen thoughtfully. "Well, if you want a potentially nasty
possibility, and as long as this is just a simulation. What if I got *this*
individual to be Ranma's guardian and sensei."
"You could do that?" Toltiir was a little surprised. "I didn't know you knew
him."
"He owes a favor to someone who owes a favor to me," Raideen supplied.
--------
Son Of A Worse Father Omake, by Gregg Sharp
DISCLAIMER: Original characters by others put through my blender.
--------
Genma whistled happily. He had just sold Ranma, soon he was going to steal
him back. A simple enough transaction. It's not like a sophisticated
Japanese citizen like himself couldn't outmaneuver some gaijin peasant.
"Pop?! You *sold* me?!" Ranma stared, wondering why he had to have a father
who was such an idiot.
"It's for your own good boy," exclaimed Genma. Now he had the cash needed to
rent a house, get that pit dug, fill it with all the cats in the
neighborhood, and he'd be ready to teach Ranma the Cat Fist.
The fat man nodded. "Nine years learning what I can teach you of martial
arts. Then you go back to your father for one year before you make a choice
as to what path to take."
"NINE YEARS?!" From a five year old's perspective, nine years was an
eternity.
Genma smirked. Two days tops, then Ranma would learn this invincible style.
By the time this idiot realized Ranma was gone, they'd be far far away.
Ranma watched his father leave with a certain degree of horror. He'd been
sold before, but not like this. NINE YEARS?! By the time he got done with
that he'd be... OLD!!
"Your father tells me you want to be the greatest martial artist in the
world," said the fat man. "Is that what *you* want? It will be long and
painful."
The boy drew himself up and jerked his thumb towards his chest. "Yup! I'm
gonna be the BEST!"
"Hmmph," said the fat man, blurring as suddenly the land around Ranma
blurred as well.
"Aghhh!" Ranma managed before mainly getting imbedded in the ground by
really high gravity.
The fat man, now colored blue and having long trailing antennae that somehow
gave him a "catfish" sort of appearance tsked at the sight. "Well, I'm going
to fix dinner. If you're hungry, I'll leave a plate out."
"Nnnngh," Ranma said, trying to crawl forward. "Uhnnnn."
The fat man looked back. "If not, I'll have to see if Piccolo can take over
your training until you're ready to start some *serious* martial arts
training."
"Unnngghhh!" Ranma tried to move repeatedly, feeling squished by his own
body weight. "Hey, I'm... Ranma Saotome... and I don't..."
---------
Close up of a calender as the pages begin blowing away in the breeze, cue
music:
"With the same foolishness as walking blindly through a maze,
I stepped straight into a world containing only heartache,
Forever chasing an endless dream."
Images of a little boy growing up, being given a lot of very tough training
by a tall green fellow with pointed ears and antennae by the name of Piccolo
Daimioh.
"Don't waste your time,
All day, all night, all the time."
The prior images are replaced by images of the boy of about twelve, now much
tougher and more muscular, chasing first a monkey and then a beetle like
creature while the catfish-man (Kaioh-sama) watches.
"Don't waste your love,
It's a truth which never lets go."
Ranma is shown sparring with one figure after another, some male, some
female, some human-like, some far from it.
"Break the darkness,
Break it through the night!"
Ranma is shown getting the snot beaten out of him by a short guy with spiky
black hair and a very big attitude. As the music fades out, he holds up a
sign that reads: [Maybe I can settle for being just really damn good?]
----------
Light flared and Ranma walked through the shimmer without a backwards glance
at his "fathers" for the past few years. Piccolo, Kaioh-sama, Vegita. Not
exactly a group that was into goodbyes or touchy-feely exhibitions.
Now all he had to do was find his biological parent. Someone he frankly
wasn't that fond of. Genma had sold him off. Now he had a year to find him
and decide whether to return to where he could be one of the elite Z
Warriors or stay here and...
Ranma spat as he considered what Kaioh-shin-sama had said. His father wanted
him to be a martial artist that could be pushed around, who could provide
for his overweight lazy father by being bossed around and engaged to some
"destined fiancee" who was going to push him around and insult him all the
time.
Some of the people were staring at him. He was wearing the black sleeveless
outfit he'd gotten from Kaioh-shin-sama. Since it would regenerate from darn
near dust, it was his most practical outfit. He had no idea how many of the
red practice uniforms he'd gone through.
Then he felt it. Several high chi signatures, though they felt a little off.
One big dark chi, and a something else. Perfect. He could use a good fight,
it always settled his nerves.
--------
"Ahahahahahahaha," laughed Jedite. He wondered why he hadn't thought of
using spiders as the basis for youma previously. "You fell into my trap,
Sailor Moron! Now, youma, slay them all!"
Four little girls who hadn't been fighting evil for very long screamed as a
slavering eight limbed giant spider began moving towards them while they
were stuck within webbing.
"Oh man, this is pathetic." *SQUISH!*
The four girls screamed again, this time because bug splat had just flown
out from a point of impact.
A fifteen year old boy straightened up and regarded Jedite. "Was this *your*
monster?"
Jedite saw all the energy this boy had and realized how much Beryl would
reward him for capturing it. "Yes. And your energy belongs to the Dark
Kingdom!"
Ranma grunted as the pain of a chi-draining technique hit him. ~Well,
classify him as the bad guy. Hitting him with a chi attack would probably be
a bad thing. That leaves physical attacks. Too bad: for him.~
Jedite had a moment to blink before the boy was suddenly in front of him, a
fist heading for his face at high speed.
*CRUNCH!* (Fade, dissolve.)
"Fire... soul..." Mars finally wiggled loose enough to beginning burning
webs away.
Jupiter got a good look at their rescuer as the tension cut from her prison.
Tall. Muscular in lean way. Deep blue eyes. Ruggedly handsome. Tall. Thick
hair. Healthy looking. Tall. Exquisitely sexy. Talking to Mercury.
Jupiter blinked. How had Mercury got there before her?!
"Hi there, I'm Sailor Mercury. Thank you for rescuing us!" She looked up
into those blue eyes and found an addition to her previous activities was
mandated. Study, plan to be a doctor, and now - get a studly boyfriend!
"Excuse me," said Mars, sliding into place and somehow cutting in front of
Mercury. "I just wanted to thank you personally, maybe we could get dinner."
"Hey," exclaimed Jupiter, feeling left out and trying to cut in front of
Mars.
"It was a pretty wimpy monster," said Ranma sadly. "I didn't get a chance to
really unload."
"Oh we get those all the time," said Jupiter, thinking quickly. "They're
always attacking around here. If you want to stick around you can kill the
next one too!"
Ranma turned a joyous smile on the green-clad girl that caused four little
girls' hearts to melt into puddles. "Really? All right! Thanks!"
---------
Calender pages start flying by in the breeze again, though slower than the
first time.
Scenes of Ranma out on dates with most of the Senshi, with Ranma looking
puzzled for the most part. Ranma getting into big fights and enjoying
himself immensely. Ranma flattening Dark Generals. Ranma using a Kamehameha
Kaioh-ken San Bai Da to open up a section of Beryl's base so that the Senshi
don't have to deal with annoying youma.
The Senshi practically falling apart when Ranma announces he's leaving again
to find his father.
Ami finding his mother after Ranma leaves and announcing herself as Ranma's
girlfriend. Followed by Makoto discovering what Ami has done and announces
that *she* is also Ranma's girlfriend. Followed in its own turn by Minako
announcing that she's Ranma's fiancee! Nodoka Saotome dancing around with
little fans because her son is *so* manly.
The Doom Tree saga occurs, Ranma crosses paths with the Senshi again. More
fight sequences. Ranma is introduced to his mother. His mother starts
hinting very strongly that any of the four girls trying to marry him would
be a good catch.
Sailor Pluto wanders in, checks the effect on Crystal Tokyo, starts actively
trying to fix Ranma up with ANY of the Senshi.
Genma is found in a wharfside bar in Yokohama. The name Tendo Dojo comes up.
--------
A fairly sizable house in Tokyo's suburb of Nerima, where the occasional odd
thing was known to happen.
"WHAT?!!!"
Such as the house visibly shaking from three girls exclaiming at once.
"You've never met him?" Akane looked at her father as if she could scarcely
believe this latest development. On second thought, considering that bit
with the "make millions in your own home" get rich quick scheme he'd bought
into, maybe it wasn't that far a reach.
"Nope. Genma lost track of his boy for several years, but now they've been
reunited and he's bringing his son by." Soun smiled at how well they were
taking it.
"Father, father, father," Kasumi shook her head. "I hope he's not younger
than me. Younger men are so... boring." How odd: as soon as she said that
she could swear that she heard a cat laughing in the distance.
A voice spoke from the front lawn. "This better not be a trick, old fool."
"That must be Ranma," said Nabiki, already moving at high speed towards the
door.
A moment later she ran *back* into the living room. "THERE'S A MONSTER IN
THE FRONT YARD!"
The recipient of a Yeti-carrying-an-eel-and-duck-riding-a-bull curse
shouldered his way through the front door and looked around at everyone. [Hi
Soun. Brought the boy.]
The young man walked in and caused three girls to almost forget that there
was a huge misshapen monster in their living room. He was tall and buff and
studly and dressed in a school uniform. "Can someone get some hot water so
that he can talk at least. Not that I really want to *hear* anything after
that last bonehead manuever."
"Muaaaaw," said the creature, somehow managing to sound angry and upset.
"Are you?" Soun looked over the figure and felt a ki signature radiating off
this boy that was stronger than even the Master's. Dare he hope?
"I'm Ranma Saotome. You're Tendo-san. I think my Pop wanted me to challenge
your dojo, he hasn't told me *why* it's so important to come here yet."
Ranma looked them all over. Pathetic. Not one decent fight to be had here.
Kasumi ducked to her kitchen to fetch hot water and not incidently hide her
blush.
Nabiki was eyeing the boy in the tight uniform, realizing that it was
probably so tight because they didn't make them in his size, and that he
made all of the boys at Furinkan look like starving dogs. He certainly
passed the studmuffin test, now if he could just give some indication of how
intelligent or wealthy he was.
Akane gaped. She was able to read some level of martial arts skill, thereby
knowing exactly how much force to use against her horde of "admirers"
without permanent injury, but what she was reading just could not be real!
Could it? How to get him out to the dojo so she could check? Ah, he thought
he was here for a challenge?
"At last you're... URK!" Soun attempted to do a flying crying glomp, a more
difficult manuever than it sounded. He ran into a hand that was considerably
harder than concrete. Soun Tendo went night-night.
"Was that the challenge?" Ranma sounded puzzled. He was a trained martial
artist. If attacked, he would defend himself before he even registered what
was going on. Had someone tried to catch him unawares?
"Okay, then I challenge you!" Akane smirked. Not only would she be able to
see how good this guy was, once she'd beaten him this engagement would be
off.
"Fine. Where?" Ranma shrugged. Maybe this girl was concealing her power.
Really really really well.
"Dojo. Now!" Akane's smirk went to a nearly feral grin. She loved it when a
plan came together.
The minotaur was looking panicked (as a matter of fact, he had adopted a
pose recognizable as "The Scream" to art enthusiasts) before he started
waving a sign around (accidently imbedding it briefly in the ceiling).
[Don't do it! You'll die!]
Nabiki went briefly into the kitchen and came back with some beans to throw
at the obvious oni that had come to visit if he caused any more damage to
the house.
Ranma walked into the dojo and stretched. He wondered where the repellor and
hardening fields were. Otherwise this place would be way too flimsy to be a
*real* dojo.
"Ready," said Akane, getting into position and pose.
"Whenever you are," replied Ranma. When was this little girl going to show
her power? She was certainly confident enough.
"Hiyaaaa," Akane started forward.
Ranma's arm seemed to blur for a second.
--------
Nabiki and Kasumi gaped as the minotaur grabbed the kettle, upended it over
himself, and turned into a portly man with evil piggy little eyes.
"Thank you. I am Genma Saotome," said the man, bowing slightly.
"Genma! So good to see you," Soun exclaimed, holding an ice pack to his
head.
"No time, we've got to save your daughter's life!" Genma turned and began a
dash towards the dojo.
Ranma came out of the dojo, someone draped over his shoulder. "Man. She
*sucks.*"
"Aaaaa! My little daughter is dead!" Soun began wailing.
"Pop, why did you want me to challenge this dojo? I stopped her with a
forehead flick. This wouldn't even make a decent warmup."
"Oooo," said Akane. "I'll try the red dress, mommy."
Akane was quickly laid down and got Soun's ice pack on her forehead.
"Well, son, these are my daughters. This is Kasumi, she's 19. This is
Nabiki, she's 17. This is Akane, she's 16. Pick whichever one you like..."
Soun noticed Genma making shushing gestures behind Ranma's back.
Ranma made a face. "I'm not a cannibal, Mister Tendo."
"That wasn't what he meant," began Nabiki.
"Oh?" Ranma thought a bit then brightened. "Oh! This is like that society on
Yellow Island, isn't it? Oh well that's different! I was worried there for a
moment."
Kasumi's blush increased as the boy eyed Nabiki and herself for a few
moments.
"...but I don't like brussel sprouts," Akane informed everyone during the
silence.
"You two are actually okay with this?" Ranma asked. The one girl was
blushing and looking down at the floor. Kinda like Ami. The other met his
eyes and seemed to be a bit more like Rei.
"Family honor is involved," said Kasumi, though she was really hoping more
would be involved.
"Well, I'd kind of like to get to know you first," said Nabiki after
continuing to consider this boy.
Ranma shrugged. "Okay. Fine."
"You're going to choose which one to be your wife?" Soun asked in the
silence.
"HUH?!" Ranma was flabbergasted. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"
"...boys are icky! I like girls." Akane said in a little girl's voice.
"What did you think he meant?" Nabiki wondered aloud.
"You know like Yellow Island," said Ranma absently, giving his father a look
that seemed to promise unspeakable violence was in the offing. "You defeat a
dojo there, you get one of the students to be your indentured servant for
five years during which time you take them on as a student as well - then
they go back and make their own dojo stronger or they renew for another five
years."
"No, the arrangement was to marry one of my daughters. So which will it be?"
Soun wondered where Yellow Island was. If the Master had ever gone there
he'd likely never have come back.
Ranma considered something, then doused his father with cold water. "You're
able to take more punishment as a minotaur, Pops."
The minotaur turned to flee but was stopped by Ranma grabbing his tail. The
minotaur's churning hooves began to seriously tear up the floor.
Ranma held up a finger. "Let's see. There was the 'I need to gauge your
skill level so I'm going to take you to this *cursed* training ground in
China' crap. Remember *that* good idea, Oyaji? If you'd gotten me cursed the
Beijing circus would have a stuffed minotaur on exhibit, you know? Then
there was the Amazon village, remember that one? Oh yeah, 'let my son fight
off the entire damn village because I couldn't keep my hands off the feast'
or something along those lines wasn't it?"
"Huh?" Akane sat up abruptly, then winced and wished she hadn't. "Hey! I'm
not beaten yet! I... how did I get into the living room?"
"Mister Tendo, did you know that my *Mom* is the 'head of clan' for my
family? Carries the sword and everything. If she doesn't give her approval,
it doesn't happen. She's *already* engaged me." Ranma explained this while
casually keeping the minotaur in place.
"WHAT?! GENMA! IS THIS TRUE?" Soun glared at his old friend.
"Excuse me, but he's had this coming for awhile." Ranma let the minotaur go
momentarily, then re-snagged him in the back yard. With a quick flick of his
arm, he launched the minotaur into the air.
"Hey, you, our fight isn't over yet!" Akane didn't want to admit defeat
until this guy moved at least. The last time he'd just stood there as far as
she could tell.
"Ka ME!" Ranma brought his hands back and cupped them, looking at the
distant speck in the sky. "Ha ME!" A bright glow formed and then filled the
space between his hands.
"Hey, I'm talking to you!" Akane started forward then realized what she was
looking at. "Oh."
"HA!" Ranma wasn't bothering with a powered up version of the kamehameha.
The basic was enough. Turning, he addressed the Tendo patriarch, beginning
to hover in the air preparatory to flying off. "Just letting you know. Three
strikes. He's out. It'll probably take him a day or two to get back."
Soun considered. "So, uhm, which daughter did you..."
"Oh he wants..." Kasumi blinked repeatedly. Three strikes and he was willing
to blast his father somewhere out into the Sea Of Japan. What would be left
of her house if Ranma was engaged to Akane with *her* temper? (Sudden image
of her sweeping out a bomb crater.) "Nabiki! Definitely Nabiki." Nabiki
needed someone to rein her in, so this was a perfect arrangement.
Nabiki looked at the boy hovering in midair. She tried manipulating or
pushing this boy around and he'd push *back!* And she didn't like hospitals.
Admittedly Akane had attacked *him* and he hadn't done much, but could she
keep control of a situation with a guy who could fly and throw energy
bolts?! "Akane! He definitely wants Akane!" Akane was the toughest
physically out of all of them. If any of them could survive the courtship,
it would be Akane! Besides, Akane needed someone she could beat on who
wouldn't get injured.
Akane blinked repeatedly. A martial artist who could throw energy bolts and
fly? Then her earlier estimate had been correct? The throbbing headache was
caused by someone so good he could *casually* defeat her? He'd HIT her? No
way would *she* end up with someone like that! Nobody could hurt Kasumi
though! She was too sweet and gentle for anyone to harm. "Kasumi! He wants
Kasumi!"
Soun blinked, thinking back to an earlier statement. Maybe if they got a
chance to know each other? And if Ranma's mother got to know the girls, then
surely they'd win her heart. "Why not go with that Yellow Island thing?"
Kasumi blinked in the middle of pushing Nabiki forward. Nabiki stopped
trying to push Akane forward. Akane stopped trying to push Kasumi forward.
"WHAT?!"
--------
Kasumi looked sadly back at her house. Nabiki sniffled at the thought of
dismantling her network of spies, informants, and purchasing agents. Akane
grumbled LOTS.
"I can't believe we were sold off like that, there are laws you know!" Akane
was not a happy camper by any stretch of the imagination.
"At least we get out of it during school time," said Nabiki. "Though I've
got to rebuild everything at Crossroads Senior."
Kasumi turned and began trudging along, the picture of dejection.
"Well, when I start training you, you'll be able to fly here during your off
time."
Kasumi came to a complete stop and stared up at Ranma, pictures of Peter Pan
flitting through her head. "Fly?"
"Yeah, you said something about taking us on as students, didn't you?"
Nabiki considered what it would be like if *she* could fly. The business
opportunities were high.
"So you're our sensei?" Akane mused. That wouldn't necessarily be a bad
thing.
"Yeah, I didn't realize I'd be taking on so many students," said Ranma from
where he hovered.
"Many?" Nabiki asked.
"NI HAO, AIREN!" A crowd of girls in Chinese clothes exclaimed in unison.
"How am I gonna explain *this* to Mom?" Ranma asked the heavens.
===================
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"What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?" Jean-Jacques
Rousseau
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