[Ranma][Fanfic] The Bet - Too Much (Green Side, Track 1)
MetroAnime
Betfic- A Bet Too Much (still not finished, don't panic)
Track 1, Green Side
char tm various other people.
gregg sharp, Metro...@aol.com
http://members.aol.com/greggsharp/index.html
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"tINY cHANGE."
Toltiir gave one of those deep, heartfelt
sighs that indicated he was well and tired of this.
Not so much the various bets, but when the
nonhumanoids got involved...
Take this one, whose name was Rolling-
Golden-Orange-Red. Toltiir immediately dubbed it
Goldie. Goldie was a minor Fate incarnation that
dealt with a race of methane breathers. Of course,
that meant that it understood humans about as well
as Tatewaki Kuno understood quantum mechanics.
Tatewaki Kuno came to mind, because
it was he who was centered in the scrying pool.
"mAKING cHANGE, hERE." Goldie's
voice was a combination of chiming and buzzing.
It was giving Toltiir a headache.
Over to the side, a change was made
by another cloaked and mysterious figure.
--------------------------------------------------
Hours later, Ranma held the sword in
front of himself and was sitting in the Tendo-ke.
"...and so Kuno told the sword to
grant the pigtailed girl a wish." Ranma stared
in frustration at the sword. "I tried wishing for
the sword to cure my curse, and it buzzed at
me saying that there was a conflict."
"I see," Kasumi said. "If you
wished yourself free of the curse, you would
not be the pigtailed girl, and therefore the
sword would not have granted the pigtailed
girl a wish. Oh my."
Everyone stared briefly at Kasumi.
"Serves the pervert right," Akane
said, sipping her tea. "Honestly, the way you
acted around Kuno..."
"Hey! It's not my fault! You see
what it's like with a curse like this, and see how
well you cope. Geez, I got girls coming onto
me in boyform, guys coming onto me in my
girlform, and nobody listens to me in either
form!"
"You're just too irresistable for
your own good, Saotome," Nabiki smirked.
Ranma's life was never boring. "Everybody
just absolutely LOVES Ranma."
"Yeah, I w---. Damn, almost said it."
"Hmph," continued Akane. "You're
always getting yourself into these problems, Ranma,
and it's always your fault. Pervert."
"Why," Ranma turned eyes heavenward,
"did I have to get engaged to an uncute tomboy?"
"Because, Saotome," Nabiki started ticking
points off on her fingers. "You're not rich or particularly
intelligent, you suffer from chronic foot-in-mouth
disease, you're also a coward in everything but a fight,
all of which makes you completely unsuitable for me.
You're not old enough or mature enough for Kasumi.
Your curse turns you into a girl, which both I and Kasumi
find revolting. Need I go on?"
"Airen!"
"Ranchan!"
Ranma's head slumped. "Oh no."
"Ranma! How could you invite them
over!?" Akane managed to give Ranma a hurt look.
"Actually, sis, I gave them the option of
buying an info service where I call them whenever
Ranma's about to go off on an adventure or do something
that might impact their relationship with him." Nabiki
smirked. "This qualified."
Ukyou paused. She would have suggested
that the wish be that the one who loves Ranma the most
married him. Who could tell when another fiancee might
show up? Best not to risk it. "Ranchan, you could wish
that Akane knew how to cook."
"I didn't know it could perform miracles," Ranma
quickly shot out, then his eyes widened as he realized what
he had said.
"JERK!" Akane didn't bother with finding a mallet or
a shinnai, merely imbedding her fist in his face.
Ukyou hid her smile. These two were just
too easy to manipulate. "Well, Ranma, you don't need a
wish to be able to survive MY cooking."
"Spatula girl, you leave airen alone! Ranma is Shampoo's
husband!"
Ranma groaned. He couldn't get any help. A cure was sitting
here, right at hand, and he couldn't get any help here. Not even from the
ones who said they loved him.
"You jerk, are you even listening to me?" Akane hit him again.
"I wish I'd never met you!"
Ranma stared at the sword. Images of all the people he'd met,
places he'd been, trouble that had been inflicted on him seemed to just
tumble out. He was so tired of the whole thing, and frustrated because
here he might have a cure, if he only knew how to use it.
"Fine, Akane. I wish I didn't know you, or Kuno, or
ANY of you."
<GRANTED> The sword clattered to the floor and faded away
a moment later.
"Where Ranma?"
"Ranchan?!"
"Hmmm." Nabiki thought about what Ranma had just wished.
If she could unravel Ranma's current location, that might just be worth a
lot to the various fiancees. Of course, he wouldn't remember ANY of them,
but that could be considered a fresh start.
"That idiot." Akane turned towards Kasumi. "Kasumi, did you
hear what Ranma was saying? I wasn't listening."
"Ranma just wished that he didn't know any
of us," Kasumi noted. "You don't suppose..."
-------------------------------------------
_/Very far away\________
A young man groggily sat up, blinking in the
darkness around him. He had no idea where he was or what
he was doing there.
He reviewed what he had on hand. Red Chinese shirt,
black baggy pants, black Chinese shoes. His name was R-something,
but he couldn't remember much beyond that. He seemed to remember
a lot of fights, though not against who, and that he was into the
martial arts.
The boy looked around the desert. Nothing. No indication
of where he'd come from. Picking a direction at random, he started
walking towards whatever awaited him.
-------------------------------------------
Nabiki promised that she would keep them informed
if anything turned up. Cologne had been consulted as to the
wish, and she'd pointed out that wherever Ranma was, it would
be where he would not be likely to run into any of them by
accident.
As Cologne pointed out, the phrase "any of you"
was most likely inclusive of everyone he'd ever met. In order to
make that wish a reality, it would have to remove him from his
normal environment and stick him ELSEWHERE, as well as
purging his memories.
They'd all keep looking, but things didn't look very
hopeful.
After the first day, Nabiki had raked in a considerable
amount of money detailing "Saotome's Latest Screwup" for all
concerned. She merely informed Kuno that the pigtailed girl had
made a wish, only to have both Saotome and herself vanish.
Kuno was practically frothing at the idea that the two were off
on some desert island with his pigtailed girl being ravished.
By the second week, Kuno was pursuing Akane Tendo
as if he wanted to make up for lost time. This time the massive
property damage was being caused by Kuno's fights with Ryouga.
Into the second month, there was a sudden break in
the way things were going. Fingering her new "principal-approved"
haircut, Nabiki took a message from Yuji. This being one of her
informants who had been over at the Ucchan's when the young
owner had stopped being miserable about her buzzcut and had
become suddenly very interested in some program showing on
the television.
That Ukyou had closed the Ucchan's immediately
thereafter was even more suspect. The program had been one of
the usual documentaries, dealing with the weird things that
gaijin did. Some American who was making a name for himself
doing sleight-of-hand and martial arts and his twin sister the
singer.
Nabiki got the name of the program, checked the
listings, then called Shampoo and finally, Akane. They had already
paid for this, after all.
-------------------------------------------------------
After sitting through some inane bit about some
idiot who tied a bunch of weather balloons to a lawn chair
and then found himself inside a flight lane in Los Angeles,
another segment came on that caused a few gasps in the
Tendo living room.
"Appearing out of nowhere in Las Vegas two
months ago, Robert Wu." The image on the
television left no doubt who this was.
"Airen?!!"
"I'd recognize that pigtail anywhere." Nabiki's
smirk said volumes more.
"Oh my. America?"
Ranma's voice came over the speaker, followed
by the Japanese translation. "I, Robert Wu, want to thank
my many fans for your support. And I hope all of you bet
on me tonight, cause I hate to think any of ya were just
throwing away your money."
"I'd recognize that swelled head anywhere,"
said Akane, smiling and scratching her bowl haircut.
"I didn't know Ranma was that good at
English." Kasumi smiled at Akane, things could get
back to normal.
"It's probably an effect from the wish."
"Hiba-chan? Where Las Vegas?"
"Saotome! We must go retrieve your
son."
"Making well in excess of $2,000 a show,"
continued the TV announcer, "Robert Wu and his
mysterious assistant are one of the hottest new acts
on the Las Vegas strip."
"Two...thousand...dollars...a...show."
Nabiki started to twitch.
"My. That's quite a bit of money, isn't
it," asked Kasumi. "That would be over four
hundred thousand yen a night, wouldn't it? I
wonder if his mysterious assistant gets paid the
same amount."
Everyone ignored Nabiki as she leaned
against a wall and twitched a lot.
A picture of Ranma going into a coffin,
which is rotated once, then opened to reveal Ranma
in girl form, who came out singing.
"I didn't know Ranma could sing."
Kasumi blinked.
"Oh how horrible, to use his martial arts
prowess for petty gain, and to be singing such
insipid love songs...how my heart grieves for you,
Saotome!!"
The panda blinked and pulled out a
sign. [How much did they say he was making?]
The TV was going on about how this
Chinese immigrant had turned one win at a bar
fight into a series of professional fights, then had
recently gotten his big break. Details were even
more sketchy about the assistant, but the common
belief was that they were twins.
"Robin Wu has recently been offered
a recording contract and is a frequent sight at local
events." The television now showed "Robin" as
bouncing around on a stage, working the crowd as
a rock band began to play.
"Movie deals following the remake of
the video for ZZ Tops 'Legs' are merely rumored."
Video footage of "Robin" doing a number of kicks
and special manuevers in a crowded fight scene.
Cut to a picture identified as George
Lucas. "No, I have not been contacting Robin Wu
for the role of the Jedi assassin in the next Star Wars
film. Thank you, though, that _is_ a good idea."
Everyone's attention was drawn to the
thump Nabiki made as she hit the floor. She'd been
doing the math.
"I think Robin would make the perfect
Bond girl for the next film!" A British voice said
as stock James Bond footage rolled.
Nabiki managed an "urk!"
"Great Grandmother? Where Las Vegas?"
"I've never been there. It sounds like an
interesting place though. Maybe we should visit it."
"Oh, good idea! We need take break from
running Cat Cafe anyway."
When Nabiki was finished adding up all
the figures, she looked at her sister. Akane was
looking sadly at the television, fingering the awful
haircut she'd gotten at the hands of the principal's
latest attempt at discipline.
"Look at it this way, sis," Nabiki said,
trying to cheer her up. "Ukyou always wearing those
boy's uniforms got an even worse haircut than you."
"Uhm." Akane shuddered. "Shampoo is
going. Ukyou is going. I can't afford to go, can I?"
Nabiki looked at the latest repairs from
where the Chem Club had tried to remove Kuno
and Ryouga from Akane's vicinity. "No, sis. We
just don't have that sort of money."
The two returned their gazes to the
program, one sadly, the other speculatively.
---------------------------------------------------------
Where does this go?
"Robert Wu" and "Robin Wu" are,
of course, Ranma. He (and everyone else)
assumes that Chinese clothing=he's Chinese.
He doesn't speak ANY Japanese, doesn't
remember anything before waking up in the
desert, other than his martial arts skills, the
curse, and a few other talents.
Ranma's luck has begun to swing
the other way, without some of the problems
of his past, all that karma is shifting in his favor
for a change. He's making a fair amount of
money, and only one thing is really bothering
him.
That's in his dreams. He vaguely
remembers one person who wasn't included in
the daily list of problems, people who used him,
threatened him, blackmailed him, attacked him.
She's associated with said people, so he doesn't
completely remember her...but if he sees her he'd
know that she's a link to his past.
Other than that, Ranma's happier
than he's been in a long time. He hopes to keep
the martial arts/magic going for a few more
weeks, then quietly retire and concentrate on
"Robin's" singing career. At this point he's
equally comfortable/uncomfortable as a boy
or a girl since he has no idea which is his
natural condition, only that it is some kind
of water curse. Once his "gig" in Las Vegas
runs out, he'll be off to California as he has
no real reason to stay in Vegas.
Can we see a Cat Cafe appear
near Ranma's new home? Followed by a
pizza chef extraordinare?
Nabiki trying to figure an angle
she can use to get some of Ranma's money,
when a TV interview of the new "Bond girl"
reveals the sketch of someone that Ranma
feels is very important ("...a sister, perhaps,
or maybe Robert's lover...") but that the
amnesiac doesn't quite remember. How will
Akane handle the idea that she isn't remembered
at all, while her sister is "the mysterious beauty"
mentioned in the tabloids? How will Kasumi
handle being in the tabloids? "Oh my!"
oh well, until i find something weirder to write,
ja ne,
gregg