[Ranma][FanFic] Omake Theatre: Worse Parent Than Genma take 2-3
metro...@mindspring.com
"What if someone *else* had fulfilled Genma's role," mused Toltiir.
"With Ares, we saw a capable martial artist who frankly didn't take much
crap off anyone," reminded Bast. "Unfortunately, or fortunately if you
prefer, he had little in the way of traditional Western morality."
"Yeah, none of this 'don't hit girls' or 'let other people push me around'
sort of thing." Ares felt that he'd done a pretty darn good job there. And
it had been strangely fulfilling to take on the role of father-sensei. Much
better than he'd done with his two real sons.
"I disagree, Genma did a much better job of raising Ranma," argued Fleece.
"Look at that Ranma! Anybody who jumps him shouting 'Ranma, prepare to die'
is gonna get killed! Heck, if the Nabiki in *that* world tried half the
stuff I did with *my* version of Ranma, she'd be lucky if she didn't end up
in the hospital!"
Ares considered the idea briefly. "Nah. More likely he'd just contact the
local Yakuza and tell them that this little girl was poaching on their
territory. Once he did that..."
Fleece flinched at the likely consequences of *that* sort of thing. "You see
what I mean? THAT Ranma is going to have even more social problems than the
original."
"So. You're saying you could do a better job?" Bast purred as she regarded
the Nabiki Tendo that had dared to cross path with the gods, and had ended
up becoming a minor goddess herself due to the whims of Toltiir. There were
times when Fleece was in serious danger of being demoted as per Titania's
suggestion - to tooth fairy.
Nabiki *almost* said "Yeah, right." The grins around her were enough clue.
"NO! NO WAY! I am *NOT* going to play the part of Genma Saotome!"
"Spoilsport," said Ares. "Put your money where your mouth is."
"Well, who do *you* think would do a better job of being Genma?" Toltiir
blinked at the girl, yellow eyes gleaming. "Keeping in mind the following
points typical of Ranma timelines:
a) Ranma must be a highly ranked martial artist, it may not be his only
focus, but it's got to be in there.
b) His orbit must intersect the Tendos. He may not end up engaged to any of
'em. Maybe neither group knows about the arrangement, but they'll at least
meet. The test point is Ranma meeting them, and how different it is from the
original.
c) The person who does the raising has to spend at least ten years
subjective in the simulation."
"This ain't another Bet, is it, Toltiir?" Bast glared at the cat.
"Heaven forbid, no. Just a possibility of related omake." The cat waved a
paw.
"Well, in that case," suggested Nabiki with her own catty expression.
Almost everyone traced her gaze to the side where a visitor had been
preoccupied with other concerns. More smiles.
The old man looked up.
----------
"He'll be here any moment," said Soun, smiling at the prospect of joining
the two families. Though the calligraphy was much more neat and precise than
he'd expect from Genma. The wording had been odd too. "Tendo- I will be
bringing Ranma on Mar-11. We shall discuss the engagement then. -S"
"So is he cute?" Nabiki asked, not quite as mercenary as she would later
become. In an unaltered timeline, that is.
"How old is he. Younger men bore me," said Kasumi, not quite as oblivious as
she would later become. Were everything to remain normal, of course.
"Hmmmph, boys," Akane grumbled. Boy=pervert=target. Math wasn't her best
subject but some things were obvious. The entire gender could be deleted
from existence or chained into dungeons and she'd be a lot happier. She
hated boys. She loathed boys. Boys had ignored her most of her life, and
then suddenly she couldn't literally beat them off. Boys were beyond icky.
There came a knocking at the door as if someone had not gotten into a fight
on the way to the dojo.
"That must be Ranma!" Nabiki hoped for cute. Rich would be even better. Cute
and rich? Too much to hope for. But she would certainly settle for cute.
"I do hope he's older," sighed Kasumi.
"ACK!" Soun made a warding sign. There was no paunchy Genma present, just
Nabiki (who had somehow gotten out the door before him) eyeing a tall and
broadshouldered young man. That wasn't the ack part. An old man, still
standing straight and proud, was eyeing him as if judging him on his entire
life experience and deciding that he was just barely worth continued
existence.
"Oh my," Kasumi looked over the boy. Tall, strong, lithely muscled,
immaculately dressed in a nice dress shirt, slacks, and boots of some kind.
Very nice if a bit Westernized in appearance.
"hmmmmph," hmmmphed Akane, then turned around and walked back into the
house. Okay, the boy was fairly good looking. THAT didn't mean anything.
"Genma couldn't make it," said the old man. "May we come in?"
--------
"So Genma died and you took over his training," Soun said, nodding.
"Yes, Genma fell into a pit of starving cats. Terrible tragic story." The
old man didn't look as if he thought it was terribly tragic. "So we've been
wandering back and forth, hither and yon."
"Yes, well, these are my three daughters," Soun said, indicating each girl
and her age, then turning back to Ranma, "pick any one you like. She'll be
your new fiancee."
"Geez, they're not bagels, Mister Tendo. Pick one? None of them seem
interested. Besides there are other more pressing concerns."
"AH?! It's a matter of family honor." Soun glanced over the three. "Akane is
a martial artist, she'll be your fiancee."
"Oh my," said Kasumi, who was too old and housewifeish to be chosen. And was
regretting it. Ranma was polite and had a cute... he was nice.
"WHAT?!" Nabiki and Akane reacted with entirely different motives.
"You see?" Ranma gave a helpless shrug. A beeping from a pocket caused him
to consult a pager. "Ooops. Gotta go. Old man, you handle this?"
The old man nodded.
"But but but but but...?!" Soun was going into shock. If only Genma were
here to back him up!
Nabiki, Kasumi, and Akane blinked. Ranma had gotten lost by going off into
their backyard. Their reactions were quite different. Nabiki was intrigued
by the boy's butt... err purposeful stride. Akane was wondering what the
pervert was up to. Kasumi wanted to make sure there were no hard feelings,
sometimes her father made a rather poor first impression.
Ranma ducked around the side of the dojo. This really got the three curious,
as there was nothing back there. As one they approached from a different
angle. Yes, there was that fiance. He was standing still, looking
heavenwards, and his mouth opened as he said a single word.
"SHAZAM!"
*BOOOM!* Thunder answered.
Nabiki had just realized that she'd leapt up and was being held by Kasumi as
all three sets of eyes watched a major hunk fly up and away in a high speed
blur.
"That was *Captain Marvel*..." Nabiki said to Kasumi.
"Oh my, oh dear," said Kasumi who had little hearts floating in her eyes.
Not a boy at all. Oh heavens no. There had been a nobility and maturity in
the Captain that just did not fit any of the categories she placed younger
boys in. Nope.
Akane stood where Ranma had stood, took an identical pose, and tried
something. "Shatsamu. Shatsam! Sha- tsa - mu! Damnit, why won't it work for
me?"
Kasumi let Nabiki go, her arms were getting heavy anyway, and considered.
Captain Marvel seemed very mature. Perhaps she should speak up. Running off
to save the world probably made for not eating as well as he should
normally.
Nabiki thought about this. Let anyone know she knew who Captain Marvel was?
Oh yeah, duh! The moment she even advertised something like that, she'd be
kidnapped by supervillains and tortured for the information. She was
allergic to being tortured. Not to mention she'd be alienating someone who
could wrestle Godzilla and any friends he happened to have!
Akane sulked. If some stupid boy could transform into Captain Marvel, why
couldn't she? Twenty years ago there had been a Mary Marvel, there was a
girl named Aoi Marvel who'd briefly appeared in Osaka, so why not Akane
Marvel? She was noble and worthy and nobody could say she wasn't a great fig
hter! Dang it.
Three girls found their father alone, crying to the extent that there was
going to be no answers from that quarter.
Nabiki mused. Captain Marvel made headlines. When he was in China recently,
he made news fighting some sort of Juggernaut. All she had to do was wait
for him to start appearing in a particular area, then track him down. She
was sure that she could make a good press manager.
Kasumi thought. It seemed to her that if the Captain was off saving Japan or
the world, he'd need someone to cook and clean and maintain a home. Well,
what an amazing coincidence that she currently had no suitors or prospects.
Look for where the trouble is, he'd be nearby, then she could grab him and
make mad passionate... uhm apply for a job and get to know him.
Akane glowered. She'd catch that boy and make him tell her the secrets of
whatever martial arts technique he'd used to transform! Then she could go
assist the Senshi!
Soun wailed. Prior engagements?! "Waaaaaaaaa!"
-------
Ranma sped across town so quickly that he was just a blur, and smiled. THIS
was living. Everything that was so confusing was suddenly clear, the world
was his rice bowl, he felt a thousand times more alive than as plain old
Ranma Saotome.
One didn't need the Wisdom of Solomon to see the dangers in staying as
Captain Marvel for too long. Black Adam was still around, somewhere, a
wonderful advertisement of how power could corrupt. Then there was that
mysterious Juggernaut who had appeared in China. Someone who could hurt
*him*. But here was the thing that had drawn him.
Captain Marvel came to a halt to observe the battle before he weighed in. It
looked like he should do something...
Now.
------
Usagi shrieked like a little girl (which she was actually - being fifteen
years old) as the big yoma prepared to bring that gleaming claw down and
reduce her to the consistency of fish paste. Her Moon Rod had been knocked
out of reach and the other senshi had been scattered about with a few
swipes.
"SAILOR MOON!" Several young girls cried as they watched what was about to
be a gruesome scene.
Tuxedo Kamen prepared to throw a rose despite that the past three had
bounced off the armor plating on the creature.
"Excuse me, may I cut in?"
Everyone blinked. Some guy had popped out of nowhere, and was lifting the
yoma up into the air by a grip on its outstretched paw.
Tuxedo Kamen dropped the rose, feeling completely and totally inadequate.
The yoma roared and tried to swing at the caped man holding it.
"Shall we dance?" The man threw the yoma straight up, giving the crowd a
good look at the chest emblem of a stylized lightning bolt.
"CAPTAIN MARVEL?!" Venus, Mars, Mercury, Moon, and Tuxedo Mask exclaimed.
"My new sempai..." Sailor Jupiter said dreamily, little hearts beginning
orbits around her head.
The yoma came down, Captain Marvel stopped its progress with an uppercut.
The yoma disintegrated.
Sailor Venus sighed longingly as she checked out a powerful physique and
high charisma level. Idol singers suddenly dropped on her priority scale to
a new low.
"Well, Sailor Senshi," said Captain Marvel, floating slightly above head
level. "I've wanted to make your acquaintance. Shall we arrange a meeting to
discuss pooling our resources?"
Seeing that Mars was too starstruck, Venus was drooling, and Jupiter was
repeating something about a sempai every so often, Mercury quickly set up a
meeting for after school the next day on the roof of her mother's hospital.
(Which had the benefits of being remote and accessible. Thoughts of a home
court advantage were ruthlessly suppressed.)
There was a group sigh as the Captain flew away.
"I don't trust him," said Luna as soon as the fellow was out of earshot. "He
wasn't present in the Moon Kingdom after all, and... why is everyone looking
at me like that? HEY! LET ME OUT OF THIS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! USAGI!"
"Where'd you get a mailing box anyway," Venus asked Mercury.
"Oh dear, ha ha, I just happened to have one handy," Mercury said, blushing
furiously. After all, the Captain was said to be quite intellectual, and
well, Ryo hadn't been around for over a year, and well... (blush twitch
shrink blush-some-more)
Venus smirked. She knew one way to make sure he was considered part of the
group. And if Sailor Venus had to drag the stud off by his cape, she was
gonna make sure he knew she was willing to be his... friend. Or something
like that.
Jupiter was already gone. She had to make sure she had plenty of cookies
baked so she could bring them along and introduce herself to her new sempai!
Mars wanted to check the sacred fire and see if Shinto priestesses and
Divinely empowered superheroes were a good match. She was sure they were,
but maybe a horoscope would be good too.
Tuxedo Mask waved his hand in front of Usagi's face and sighed. Well, at
least he knew that he'd end up with Usagi. And maybe the Captain could
deflect some of the looks that had been heading his way lately from the
other Senshi.
"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Luna called from inside the box marked "To: Paris" by
Usagi and "by way of Elbonia" by Ami.
"You weren't going to really mail that were you?" Venus turned to find
Mercury running off. Wait a minute! She had to get things ready for meeting
her new boyfriend tomorrow!
Tuxedo Kamen became Mamoru and picked up the boxed kitty. Looked like their
current adventure had gotten more complicated.
0MAKE-----------------
"Put your money where your mouth is, that's all I'm saying," said Fleece.
"ME?!" Toltiir held a paw against his chest. "Impersonate Genma? Are you
sure you want to lay that challenge down?"
"You're the one who stated that 'almost anyone would be a more acceptable
father than Genma' weren't you?" Fleece studied the cat with a smirk on her
face.
"Actually, no, I didn't. Still... the idea has *some* merit." Toltiir
blurred and there were suddenly two cats. Another blur and one of the cats
looked sort of like Genma.
"Are you supposed to be Genma Saotome?" Nabiki asked in a dry voice. "Genma
doesn't wear plaid, much less a kilt..."
"Artistic license."
"..or have rippling muscles..."
"He thinks he does."
"...nor does he have that much hair..."
"Force of habit."
"...and he certainly doesn't play the bagpipe."
Toltiir-genma sagged a little. "No bagpipe?"
Fleece shook her head.
"Well phooey." The bagpipe and Scottish ceremonial outfit was replaced by a
dingy, formerly white, gi. "The difference is, *I* can make this look good."
"Right..." Fleece shook her head. "Now... what *are* you doing?"
"Genma" was sitting back in a recliner, a wall screen TV in front of him,
clicking a remote control while munching on a bag of Unryuu-brand BBQ Pork
Rinds (tm).
The other, more feline looking, Toltiir answered. "Looking for a timeline
that's suitably dark and nasty and no fun."
"Got it," said the Genma version. "See, it's one of those multiple crossover
thingies, and Crystal Tokyo dies a nasty horrible death when the Swarm come
in and destroy everything. So..."
--------------
Queen Serenity, formerly a girl named Usagi, dropped unconscious and dying -
she'd thrown everything she had into the battle. Nothing had worked.
Sailor Pluto panted slightly, watching as the energy-beings known as The
Swarm entered the Palace. Everything that could be done had been done, every
force that could be brought to bear had been. In the first thirty minutes
since the Swarm had entered the solar system, fifteen billion people had
died. Including all the Inner Senshi.
"Now if you look to the right, you'll see the burning remains of Crystal
Tokyo," said a black furred cat walking on his hind legs and holding a tall
pennant in one hand. The pennant read "Temporal Tours".
"Who? What? Where?" Sailor Pluto wasn't quite ready for this.
"Oh, excuse me, my business card." The cat handed Sailor Pluto a card and
placed another in the mouth of the fallen Serenity.
"'Toltiir, former god of Chaos, Elder god of Mischief,'" read the red-eyed
Senshi.
"Now my deal, SetSunny, is quite simple," Toltiir waved a paw. The Swarm,
millions of energy absorbing creatures a dozen times more powerful
individually than an Eternal form Senshi, abruptly turned into koosh balls.
"I *could* respect the sanctity of the timeline and not do anything, leaving
the Swarm to extinguish all life in this solar system."
Sailor Pluto blinked as she realized one of the semi-transparent beings had
apparently made it as far as this room, as a koosh ball had just dropped
from the ceiling. "O-kaaay." The Senshi of Time was still feeling a little
numb. She was alive, and her Queen was alive, so she was listening.
The cat abruptly became a labcoated individual with wild hair. Setsuna
immediately recognized Christopher Lloyd's character from "Back To The
Future." "Or I could just accept that this is an unhappy ending and make an
alteration. The K'Tee, you see, are a nonsentient lifeform - about as
intelligent as a bee when you consider 'em as individuals. Hive structure -
in a manner of speaking - so a full Swarm is about as intelligent as a pack
of wolves."
"Ah," said the Guardian Of The Gate Of Time as she listened, aware that the
Queen was also conscious and listening now.
"The Swarm developed in the furnace of a galactic core," continued the
professor. "Any force used against them will be absorbed. They are drawn to
forces of Order, and the more powerful and regulated, the more they're drawn
to it. So, in any universe where there is a Swarm and the sort of heavily
regulated Crystal Tokyo you've built here, they'll swarm right over you."
"All my citizens, all those people." Serenity drew herself up. "What must we
do?"
"Simple," said the Professor, materializing a blackboard and scribbling on
it. " A little less predictibility and a twist in the past. I prescribe a
Chaos Factor. This will keep your own forces stronger and provide a degree
of defense."
"No, Crystal Tokyo must be..." Sailor Pluto slumped. "Never mind."
Another blur and the professor changed to a circa 1965 California surfer
boy. "Like, dudes, check out the window. That's, like, the present-future
we be talkin' about as a possible. If ya think it's something ya can deal
with, then just give me permission to engage an Inner Senshi to a guy named
Ranma Saotome."
"You have *this* level of power," said Setsuna Meiou, gesturing outside at
the crowded plaza. "Why not just do it?"
The surfer grinned and shrugged. "Hey, it's *your* timeline. Might as well
ask permission."
"If it would benefit the people," said Serenity as she listened to distant
music carried to the window on the breeze, "I would engage *all* the Senshi
to this man."
The surfer looked startled for a moment then laughed. "Oh, I can definitely
work with that."
-----------
Genma tossed the little boy into the pit. He hadn't been able to read the
waterlogged manual that well. Ne-something had to be in the pit. After some
contemplation and looking around, he'd been able to gather up hundreds of
hungry "nezu" - rats. Starving them and keeping them for several days in a
pit, Genma had at last been ready to teach his son this invincible
technique.
"AAAAAAAAA! Daddy! They're biting me!"
Genma sighed. What a weak little child he was to train. "Stop whining like a
little girl!"
"Aaaaaa-***"
Toltiir frowned. This was decidedly *not* funny. Which would never do,
obviously. No. Not even vaguely. How to correct this, that was the question.
Something subtle and tasteful. Ah, there we go. Perfect.
Genma blinked as a black cat ran around him, counter clockwise, thirteen
times, while some music box played "Pop Goes The Weasel" in the background.
He had barely touched that bottle of sake, so this was *most* peculiar.
*WHAM!*
Genma picked himself up, wondering how in the world a grand piano had landed
on top of him. It was a good thing he was a tough martial artist or that
could have done serious damage to him!
*CLANG!*
Blinking rapidly, Genma looked at the large metal weight labelled "3 tons"
which he had just barely managed to avoid. "This means something." He looked
around and could see no sign of that black cat. He glanced up. "EEEP!"
"THOOM!"
Genma began to run, which actually saved him from having Sputnik (or a
reasonable facscimile) slamming into his head at high speeds. As it was it
created a crater which freed the rats, who naturally fled.
A black cat wearing a cheerleader outfit stood atop a roof, waving pom-poms.
"G-E-N-M-A, who the heck gives a hey! Go Genma, Go Genma. The further the
better. Thank you." The little pom-poms got thrown away. "Okay. Next."
--------
The little girl looked down shyly, not sure of what she was supposed to do.
She'd just come in to visit her mother at work, and she'd found herself
ushered into this room with a heavily injured boy.
Said boy looked with his one unbandaged eye at the little girl blushing and
fidgeting, who had just handed him a flower. What he was supposed to do with
a flower he had no idea. The girl, however, was really nice. "Cute."
Ami blushed even further.
The man outside the room held a finger in front of his lips, and motioned
for the lady doctor to follow him to nearby. "You know, poor Ranma could use
someone to read to him while his injuries heal. That sort of thing. They
seem to get along well."
"You just recovered your son from this thief, I'd think you'd want to spend
more time with him yourself," Kumori Mizuno said with a raised eyebrow.
"I think it will take me some time to establish certain legal matters,
apparently this false 'Genma Saotome' has ties to the Yakuza. Poor Ranma."
The man loosened his tie and scribbled out a check. "Of course, you'll be
reimbursed in full for the time your daughter spends with him."
"I'm sorry, but Ami..." Kumori's eyes widened as she noticed the figures on
the check he was offering her. "hah?!"
"Of course, I'll make it out to her college fund if you prefer," the man
smiled and placed the check in her hands. "My poor son, being horribly
abused by that foul imposter, is going to need tutoring and some social
instruction before he can come home."
Doctor Mizuno finally dragged her eyes off the numbers to look at the
account the check was drawn from. Her knees momentarily sagged. "You're..."
"Please, Doctor. Those of my social standing dislike publicity and the sort
of scandal this could cause. Will you assist me in this regard?"
The pediatrician nodded, a little numb.
The man smiled as he looked back at the room. "They get along very well.
Hmmmm. By the way, Doctor, since they *do* get along fairly well, perhaps an
arrangement should be made."
----------
Toltiir, currently disguised as a dashing young bank CEO with ties to the
Imperial Family, flicked a set of keys up into the air and let them hang an
extra moment or two in midair before catching them.
So far, things had progressed fairly well.
Ranma's injuries had been fairly extensive, and convincing him that Genma
had not been his real father had been fairly easy and not requiring magic.
Well, the convincing him part. Especially with the help of both Ami and her
mother. People *wanted* to believe that a child's own father wasn't
responsible for this.
One week with Ranma and Ami getting along *wonderfully* before one Doctor
Kumori Mizuno had gone along with the engagement of her daughter Ami to
Ranma Saotome.
Three days had been required for one Makoto Kino to fixate on her sempai.
Her father had little problem with the marriage contract, especially as
there was a rider on it that Makoto herself could invalidate it when she
reached sixteen.
A similar arrangement with a Mr and Mrs Aino had taken two days and a
display of wealth. They wanted their little girl (given to theatrics and
poor grades even at this age) to be taken care of. Little Minako did seem to
get along with little Ranma, so why not?
Toltiir considered Haruka Ten'ou, currently enrolled in a school in
Yokohama, and Michiru Kaioh in Chiba. Difficult, but a little wheeling and
dealing with the parents had gotten the papers drawn up.
Ukyo Kuonji, even simpler. Though ten years of vengeance and that sort of
thing didn't strike the Elder god of mischief as being particularly
humorous. So, another open-ended marriage contract, and the dowry was paid
to her father who could then use the funds to open a bigger restaurant.
Now things were getting more *interesting*.
--------
Cologne sat back, having her afternoon tea, looking across the practice
field and wishing that something less boring would occur. The problem with
living this long was that you tended to see it all, and ennui was a constant
battle.
"Great Grandmama," piped a perky purple-haired five year old, "do you want
more tea?!"
*SPLURSH!*
The now-soaked girl sniffled and put the tea tray down. "...I thought you
liked my tea..."
Cologne stared. The boy was nothing special. Well, he had a strong chi. The
"Japanese businessman" accompanying him was something else altogether and
the first sight of him had caused her to spit tea all over her great (great
great) granddaughter.
Another Elder, Cologne's most persistant thorn/opposer, had obviously
detected the same thing. As it was a *male*, she responded in her usual
fashion. Bi Dea attacked with a blow that should have been instantly fatal.
She was moving faster than could be followed by normal eyes, registering
only as a blur even to Cologne who could emulate that speed herself.
Bi Dea, a 250 year old Amazon Elder, abruptly ceased to be. Cologne twitched
slightly, ignoring Shampoo, as she noted the presence of a baby bawling its
lungs out in the shade of a nearby tree. Going quickly to it, and around the
Being, Cologne determined that this was a baby *boy* and that he had the
same color eyes and hair as Be Dea had possessed. The thin tree was of the
same wood as Be Dea's elder staff had been.
Cologne's eyes swiveled back to the strangers and she felt a lurch in her
stomach as she noticed the two talking to Shampoo.
Across the distance, the man looked up and seemed to shimmer briefly. For a
brief moment Cologne saw the man wearing a pair of winged sandals, a
battered hat, and the snake-wrapped staff. Though her tribe had not been
Greek, she knew of their legends and immediately placed a name to the Being.
(She didn't know that Toltiir had impersonated Hermes a few times, and vice
versa (mainly at parties) and that Toltiir was not actually the Greek
messenger.) Hermes Trismegus, aka Mercury.
Cologne managed a forced and twitching smile. What do you do when a being
capable of annihilating your entire village with an eyetwitch comes
visiting? Be very very very *very* polite, of course.
---------
"So, what to do about the engagement between Ranma and Shampoo?" Toltiir
smiled at the old woman.
"She can't be engaged to him," said Cologne as politely as possible. "He
hasn't defeated her in combat."
"AHHH! Okay, Shampoo give up."
Cologne winced and looked outside to see where the boy had pinned Shampoo in
an impromptu wrestling match. "Uhm, well... "
"Look, Cologne, do you mind if I call you Cologne?" The sometimes-cat said
with a shake of his head. "If you honestly don't want Shampoo to be engaged
to Ranma, that's fine."
"Good," sighed Cologne with relief. "No offense, but the Greek pantheon has
never struck me as a particularly stable group."
Toltiir shrugged. "Most of the playwrights and historians were agnostics or
atheists if you recall. They tended to slant things their own way. Hebe, for
example, can be a real party animal - not that this ever came out in any of
their dramas. Athena is much less stuck up and formal than you'd think, and
Ares has recently mellowed out quite a bit."
"I... see..."
"Though I *really* want there to be a relationship between Ranma and
Shampoo," continued the mischievous Elder. "They get along fairly well.
Better than Mousse and Shampoo."
Cologne admitted that was so, but was still looking to distance herself from
the Being.
"Rival with a grudge? Nah, too likely to turn Dark and Brooding. I don't
care for Dark and Brooding. Besides, if he has *any* sort of connection to
Shampoo, Mousse will be out for blood. Sister and Brother maybe? Nah, that's
been done too often. Best friend and buddy? It's a possibility..." Hermes
tapped his fingers briefly on the table, thinking and checking neighboring
timelines. He didn't want to duplicate anything too much.
"Awww! What you do that for?"
Toltiir and Cologne blinked and as one turned to where Shampoo was flipping
an enraged Mousse off and Ranma was wiping his mouth.
"Shampoo, did you give the Kiss Of Marriage to that boy?" Cologne knew she
wouldn't like the answer.
"No, Great Grandmama."
Sigh of relief from Cologne.
"Tried to but I messed up." Shampoo went on to explain exactly *what* she
had done wrong. Though her voice trailed off when she realized her Great
Grandmother was twitching.
--------
Soun Tendo flipped through the mail half-heartedly. Bill, bill, bill,
collection notice, postcard from the wife who had dumped him for another
woman, bill, flyer for a new laundromat and sake bar, bill, bill, odd
letter.
Focussing on the odd and official looking letter, Soun slit it open before
he could settle down with the postcard and bawl his head off.
"Dear Mister Soun Tendo,
"Congratulations!
You and your family have won an all expense paid trip to Northwestern
China!
Simply call this toll free number to confirm and make the schedule for a
week in rustic China touring some of the lesser known sights. Great
bargains. Great food. Great opportunities.
Henshin Tours"
Soun smiled. Just the thing for everyone to get out of the house and maybe
begin to put their lives together again!
-------
Toltiir dusted his hands off. Jusenkyo had been *so* boring. Spring Of
Drowned Girl? Ho hum. Spring Of Drowned Panda? Borrring. Spring Of Drowned
Piglet? Been there, done that. Spring Of Drowned Cat? Dull, dull, dull.
Spring Of Drowned Carp? Absolutely no fun *there*.
While he had thought about the possibilities, he'd idly altered the
composition of the planet Uranus to 75% alcohol/15% fruit juice/10% water,
with repercussions that were not immediately obvious. One of the proto moons
orbitting that planet was altered to solidly frozen whipped cream at the
same time.
After a long session (altering slightly to appear as a generic
paint-spattered French artist), of "tweaking" the Cursed Springs, Toltiir
was ready. A new template here, merging templates there, switching things
around thus and so. He wasn't quite satisfied with the results, but nothing
better had suddenly occurred to him.
Spring Of Drowned Catgirl had been a nod to Bast and that Grey fellow,
irresistable in its way.
There were a lot of "mythological being" springs now. A few endangered
species, and Panda had been altered to Hyperfertile Female Panda just to be
nice. Certainly it would make the World Wildlife types happier.
Still, Toltiir knew that restraint was *not* one of his usual qualities and
he couldn't restrain himself to such tiny little things constantly. He
needed to do some Mischief with a capital M.
Genma was out there still. He'd apparently learned that the Widdershins
Death From Above curse would only affect him if he were alone and out in the
open. For Genma of the "wild and free on the road" lifestyle, this was
torture. It didn't matter too much though, Toltiir had other fish to fry.
An idea occurred. In imitation of the human fashion, Toltiir snapped his
fingers. Unfortunately this managed to turn Herb of the Musk Dynasty female
mentally as well as physically, as well as inflicting a doubly unfortunate
desire upon her to start reading romance novels (whatever *they* were).
Which would unfortunately keep Herb and her two lieutenants from ever
seeking the Unlocking Kettle.
Toltiir's idea was simple. Convince the poor boy that his father had died,
come back and possessed a bank manager, then was returning to the grave and
would be back later.
What was needed was something to keep the child occupied until he'd worked
the large-scale mischief out of his system again.
Ah, just the thing!
The man held his hand out with thumb and pinky extended, then placed the
thumb against one ear and the pinky in front of his mouth. A ringing noise
echoed off the canyon walls a few moments later.
"Bast? Toltiir. Yeah, can you show up in this timeline for a little while?
No, just a few days a week for a year. Use an Avatar or something. What's in
it for you? Well, you know that 'Cat Fist Fury' timeline you're having fun
with? I'll leave it alone. Good, good. I knew I could count on you."
Hanging up the "phone", the Elder smirked, and began dialing another number.
"Hey, Ptah? You know that timeline you've been working on? Yeah, the one you
were trying to keep secret from me. Have *I* got a deal for you..."
----ten years later----
Genma looked nervously around. Not that there was anything unusual in this
behavior.
For five years he had lived like a troll under a bridge, getting water and
food from the river underneath while waiting for someone to come by that
could accompany him. It was because he had been stuck underneath that bridge
that he had come to realize that one of the rats he'd thrown into the pit
had actually been a kappa who had cursed him. For what he had no idea.
However, just in case, he had apologized to any rats or black cats he
happened to see.
Finally he had managed to tag along with this boy with a bandana. A mutually
beneficial relationship. As long as he stuck close to Ryouga Hibiki, nothing
fell on him. Ryouga benefitted from his direction, both in finding places
and in martial arts training. Ranma might be dead, but the school could
continue in the Hibiki lad. Genma had even planned on presenting Hibiki as
Ranma when the time arrived.
Jusenkyo had rather fouled up that idea.
"Here ya go, Ling Ling," said some gaijin, placing a bundle of bamboo shoots
in the chute.
Genma greedily grabbed them, and eyed the opening of the central area of the
enclosure. Just because nothing *had* fallen on him didn't mean nothing
*would.* He'd grown fairly leery of open areas as a result.
The gaijin looked down at Genma from above, despite the panda ignoring him.
"Ya getting some company today, Ling Ling! A *boy* panda."
Genma looked up at the gaijin. Didn't these people know he was Japanese?
They should speak Japanese instead of this infernal gabbling in English or
Chinese.
--------
The Tendo household was shunned by most of the neighborhood as a center of
weirdness unparalleled in the rest of Nerima. Considering that this was
Tokyo, and Nerima particularly, this actually had a bit of weight to it.
An angry-sounding hummingbird was a usual visitor at the Tendo place, and
this one zipped in the window of the kitchen.
"Oh, hello, Akane. Another bad day at school?" Kasumi splashed hot water on
the hummingbird, then handed her sister a bathrobe as the ten inch
hummingbird became five foot two inches of naked girl.
"When *isn't* it?" Akane growled as she shrugged the robe into place around
her.
"Yuka and Sayuri again?" Kasumi started the next kettle warming. Nabiki
would be along shortly, after all.
Akane went into overcute pose and voice. "'But you look so cute like that'!
Arrgghh. Some friends they are. That Shiratori girl showed up too. I am
*not* a Michelle!"
"She didn't try to catch Nabiki did she?" Kasumi wasn't alarmed. Nabiki had
only been caught twice, and managed to escape on her own. Each time she'd
also shredded Azusa's little room.
"No, she actually seems to avoid Nabiki for some reason." Akane shrugged.
"Hope I can get my clothes back again. I liked that shirt."
"Well, Ukyo-san will usually get them for you," said Kasumi, thinking of
that nice okonomiyaki girl that attended Furinkan. "Or that Gos-san."
"Well, it was Yuka and Sayuri, so I expect they'll have them. Unless Kuno
decided to grab 'em." Akane let out a deep breath.
"Well, don't go anywhere. Father has some sort of announcement. Oh, here's
Nabiki now."
----------
Soun faced his three daughters over the table. Well, it was two daughters
and a velociraptor at that particular moment.
"Uhm, today I learned the location of a 'Ranma Saotome'," began Soun.
"Hsssss?! tk-tk-tk-tk-tk."
Sighing heavily, Kasumi got up to check the pot. Coming back and dumping the
contents on the large lizard, she then sat next to the dampened Nabiki.
Nabiki pulled a t-shirt out of nowhere and quickly slipped into it. "Thanks,
Kasumi. Like I was saying: As in the 'Ranma Saotome' - Japanese prince of
Libya?"
"Hmmm. You mean 'Ranma Saotome' - the streetfighting guy rated in 'Martial
Artists Monthly' as one of the top ten martial artists in the world?" Akane
frowned thoughtfully. Maybe she could get some lessons from the fellow.
"Oh my," said Kasumi who felt she had to contribute her own comment somehow.
"Oh, you've heard of him?" Soun blinked as two of his daughters rolled their
eyes and looked exasperated.
"The martial artist hero who went into Libya for a streetfight, was set upon
by darn near the entire police force, and ended up conquering the nation?"
Nabiki shrugged. "Maybe." Actually if it *was* Ranma, Nabiki had to find out
how he had done it. People were still not at all sure how that had occurred,
including a number of Libyans. How Libya had gone from impoverished nation
to world leader in bioengineered trees and crops, as well as having some of
the best desalinization and water dispersement technology on the planet,
that was equally puzzling. There was no arguing though: Libya was almost
entirely covered with farms and the beginnings of forests now.
"The Ranma Saotome who crushed Sagat and thirty two Muay Thai practitioners
when they tried to assassinate him in Bangkok last year? BEFORE his
bodyguards could react? And then brushed the entire incident off as 'a light
workout'?" Akane made a face as she set a magazine out. "Obnoxious braggart,
but yeah I've heard of him."
"Oh my," said Kasumi, noting that the magazine had fallen open to a creased
page revealing a young man who was tightly muscled and currently shirtless.
"Oh dear, oh my."
"I was being sarcastic, Akane," Nabiki informed her sister.
"May I borrow this magazine, Akane?"
Akane nodded absently to Kasumi. "So what's the deal, Dad?"
Soun drew himself up, trying to look dignified. "When I was training under
He-Who-Cannot-Be-Named..."
"You mean Happosai?"
"Don't say that name!!" Soun looked around wildly for a moment. "Nabiki, you
know better. In any case my fellow initiate and sufferer was named Genma
Saotome. He promised that his son Ranma would marry one of my daughters."
"...hubba hubba..."
Nabiki glanced over at Kasumi and wondered if maybe her elder sister had
been spending too much time in the house lately. "Waitaminute. You're saying
that one of us is honor bound to marry *Ranma*?!"
"Yes, so we're going to plan a little trip."
Three winces. Remembering the *last* little trip they'd taken.
"Maybe we shouldn't," said Akane. "After all one decent splash and we've got
some major problems."
"Not to mention the security around him is likely to be fairly tight."
Nabiki sighed. Pity though. She'd love a chance at living in opulent luxury.
Preferably in an area where cold water was nowhere to be found.
"Don't worry," said Soun Tendo. "I know what I'm doing."
"Now I'm worried."
"You said it, Kasumi." "Amen, sis."
-------
Ranma sneezed.
"Maybe is just allergies," suggested Shampoo hopefully.
"Lord Ranma, our neighbors are invading! Tanks are coming across our
Southern border."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said Ranma quite sincerely to the young soldier.
Aside from the fact that it made a mess, sooner or later there would be
casualties. "Go to Standby. Send out Atsuko." Amazing how tipping over tanks
made them essentially useless.
Cologne tsked. "It's not like them to try the same tactics over and over
again. It must be a diversion."
"Confirmed," said the soldier, listening to her commlink. "Multiple invasion
points. Jets and helicopters. Ground troops as well."
Ranma winced. "Fine. Looks like we'll have to invade *them* to get some
peace." At this rate he'd be glad when Usagi got her act together and he
could retire.
--------
Ten years on the road had made Ranma a lot of friends and acquaintances,
also contacts and those who would later rally to his banner. Some of whom
were at the very least "unusual" by local standards, ranging to "downright
alien" considering some of the worlds he'd visited.
Some of these had come to Ranma's assistance for no better reason than what
they deemed a good cause.
"Red Group, lock S-Foils in attack position."
There were those who had been looking for a home.
"Vipers, charge weapon systems. Enemy detected at 25 klicks."
There were those who had just been looking for a good fight.
"Nichieju calvary. Amazons, we have TARGETS! Are we gonna let Atsuko have
all the fun?" "HELL NO!"
There were those who were tired of their former jobs and existence, and
wanted to retire to where they wouldn't face a constant life on the run.
"...today is a good day to die... Better them than me."
There were those who didn't quite fit the local paradigm and mainly just
wanted to have fun but would become quite upset at attacks on their new
homeland.
"Catgirls, to your power armor!" "Nyowrrr!" "For the Pride!"
Finally, there were the odd ducks. Square pegs in a round world where a
kingdom as bizarre as Ranma's actually had places where they were not
considered quite so odd or freakish as might be the case in Tokyo or some
other location.
"GUYVER!" "Armor Up!" "Hmmmph!" "Isn't there another way to resolve this?"
"Are we there yet?" "Mercury" "Mars" "Jupiter" "Venus" "Pluto" "Uranus"
"Neptune" "(cough) Saturn" "Moon" "Crystal Power, Make Up!"
The invaders possessed fighter jets, combat helicopters, rifle and explosive
toting fanatics, tanks, missiles, and superior numbers. The best weaponry
cocaine and other drugs could buy.
The defenders were a motley rag-tag collection of heroes and those who
wanted to be heroes.
The battle was amazingly one-sided.
---------
"Ahhhh," said the stewardess, tripping and sending a large ice tea towards a
certain set of seats.
"Oh dear!" Kasumi leapt to the right from her seat, rather than become a
large mountain gorilla.
"Eeek!" Nabiki went from seated to clinging to the ceiling, which was better
than having a velociraptor appear on a crowded airplane.
"Vummmmmmmmmm," vummed the hummingbird named Akane.
"Excuse me, miss, do you have any sugar water?" Kasumi well knew how much
energy Akane's hummingbird used up, and her tendency on changing back to
drink the stuff in gallon jugs.
"Make it *warm* water," advised Nabiki.
---------
Sailor Moon, aka Usagi Tsukino, was *not* the world's greatest mecha pilot.
She lacked the enthusiasm of Rei for high energy weaponry, the finesse of
Ami, the combat skills of Makoto, and (thankfully) Minako's tendency to sing
"Lynn Minmei" songs while engaging the enemy.
Ranma's father had discovered that the Senshi, despite being a sentai team,
did not have any cool color-coded mecha. He had brought in some fellow to
develop said mecha over Luna's repeated protests. Said fellow (Grape? Green?
Grinch?) was now apparently involved in a relationship with one of the
Amazons who looked amazingly like Ami. He *had* however, done as he had been
bidden (with lots of encouragement from a group of Amazons who could be
twins of the Senshi) and built machines which had created facilities which
had designed and built what could only be described as giant robots or
mecha. Functioning mecha.
Usagi was currently screaming and running around, her actions copied and
translated by the Reflex System to the 60 foot tall giant robot White Lion
that she'd affectionately named "Kimba." She was also ignoring Rei's radio
commentary about "cowardly lions".
"Maybe we should form Sailor Force?" Ami asked from inside the Blue Owl.
"Only if *you* form the head this time, Ami-chan," said Rei in a hopeful
voice from her cockpit inside Red Raven.
"Bwahahahahahaha! Take that, you morons! Feel the power of love!"
"Minako-chan is scary," said more than one of the Sailor Team.
Sailor Venus used her Crescent Beam. Receptors accepted the energy,
amplified it a hundred fold, and Orange Tiger's "Crescent Howl" attack dug a
thirty mile trench in the desert.
"Sailor Moon, use your Healing Escalation to purify that city, that'll stop
all the shooting," advised Blue Owl.
"Right!" White Lion paused long enough to form the attack and bathe the city
in white light.
--------
Mohammed stopped exhorting the crowd to destroy the infidels that dared to
conquer their neighbor Libya. They hadn't allied themselves with Israel
after all. Mainly he stopped because of the strange light.
The crowd went silent too as the white light washed over all of them. Was
this some technological trick of the evil satanic Americans and their pagan
Christianity?
Mohammed blinked repeatedly. Why had he been whipping the crowd into a
frenzy of hate anyway? Didn't all this hate and violence merely feed back
upon itself in an endless cycle? And if there weren't an Israel, wouldn't it
just go back to being one sect of the Faith killing another sect? Which was
odd since the Faithful should try to follow Mohammed's preachings. Let the
mountain come to you, patience being a primary virtue.
The crowd grew thoughtful themselves. Why *were* they trying to invade
anyway? Libya had never been exactly a particularly wealthy or friendly
neighbor.
"So we should be trying to curry favor with our neighbors," advised
Mohammed, switching tactics. "Their water purification plants, irrigation
equipment, and we could turn our desert into farms. Wouldn't it be fitting
to become self-sufficient instead of relying on food being shipped in from
outside our nation?"
Muttered murmurs of agreement. Lots of food and water sounded good.
"They are not allies of Israel. They are not allies of the United States.
*We* should be their allies," argued Mohammed with passion as he got behind
this new concept. "What do we have to win by antagonizing them?"
Mutters became encouraging shouts.
"Each of us could live lives of great wealth compared to what we have now!
Instead of destroying, we could be building! These people could be our
greatest friends!" Mohammed grew ever more passionate as he thought about
the possibilities just irrigating the desert and transforming the arid sand
to fertile soil through these newcomer's technological wizardry.
More encouraging shouts answered Mohammed's latest exhortation.
---------
"Sad," said Toltiir from where he watched. Being a being of Chaos (though he
preferred Mischief which was Chaos with a few waivers and restrictions) the
imposition of such a magnitude of Order was less dark and nasty than
allowing the war to continue, but not as amusing as it could have been had
things progressed a little further.
Hmmm. Maybe it was time for Sailor Moon's major attacks to develop some
weird and occasional side effects.
---------
The Tendo plane debarked at New Tokyo International Airport.
Nabiki stared at signs of a technological level decades ahead of what she'd
seen in Tokyo.
Akane wondered where the bathroom was.
Kasumi noted how clean everything was and wondered why Akane was hopping up
and down. Oh, that's right. Three gallons of sugar water. "There's a ladies
room sign over there, Akane."
*Zoom!*
Soun looked over the video displays and lamented over the fact they had
arrived while a war was going on. He looked over the power-armor wearing
guards with big guns and disdained the reliance on weapons that these people
apparently had.
A tram pulled up and a mechanical voice sounded. "Please identify. This unit
is seeking Tendo, Soun & Company."
"Yes, that's me." Soun blinked. Talking couches on wheels. What next?
"Excuse me," said the tram. "If you will take a seat, you're expected at the
palace."
"We ARE?!" Nabiki looked quite hopeful at this.
"Yes. Hurry please, we want to get started before the crowds get going." The
tram gunned his engine a few times.
The Tendos stowed their baggage and took seats, and the little tram raced
off.
A few minutes later the door to the Ladies Room opened and Akane stepped
out, only to see no trace of her family. "...what...?!" A flash through the
moving crowd showed a golf-cart like vehicle whisking them away.
Akane thought for a few moments. There was no way to catch them on foot.
That meant... Akane turned to a nearby water fountain.
*SPLASH!*
A ruby-throated hummingbird zipped off at high speeds in pursuit.
-------
Toltiir was a little amused, as things were at last ready to reach that
"test point."
-------
"And over to the right is the guest rooms for foreign dignitaries," said the
Tram.
Nabiki had been cataloguing apparent value of her surroundings and at first
it had been amusing and a way to pass the time. After the first five minutes
the grin had faded from her face and she had begun going into shock. After
ten minutes in past the gates of the Palace, Nabiki was quite aware that she
was a small little tiny fish in the deepest part of the ocean she'd ever
been in. This was *beyond* ostentatious. It was "obscenely wealthy" in the
outer segments, and then suddenly was much less so - still extremely wealthy
but the furnishings were more comfortable and durable than obviously there
for show.
"If you look over to the left you'll find the greenhouses where we're trying
to breed a better variety of wheat," continued the Tram.
What this translated to for Nabiki was here was someone so incredibly
wealthy that they kept up appearances for those who were awed by such things
but the inner circle didn't bother with any show of wealth. They were
*beyond* wealth or material concerns. This was so very out of her depth that
she wasn't sure what she could do about it.
"The kitchens as you can see are on our right now," explained the Tram.
Nabiki blinked. Kasumi had just stepped off the tram?!
-------
The smells had been irresistable. Fresh baked cinnamon and apples, freshly
baked bread and meat pie, the unmistakable aroma of Korean Barbeque somehow
not overpowering the other fragrances.
Kasumi had been off the annoying talking tram and through the door before
any of the others could react. There she stopped, overcome by the sights
before her.
Women and men, dressed in aprons, chattering about things in odd languages,
but it was what they were doing that stilled her and brought pangs of envy
to her heart.
The entire building was a big kitchen. Regular-sized stations sat beside
huge scaled-up versions of regular kitchen equipment. Barbequeing chicken
and slices of some red meat on grills, vegetables being juggled and sliced
in midair, fish being broiled, pies being made, bread being baked.
And over there... an empty spot. Beckoning her.
"Kasumi? Kasumi? Kasumi! Give me a hand with her, Nabiki." Soun didn't
understand why his eldest daughter was standing there trembling.
Nabiki looked at the huge kitchens and had a clue. For Kasumi: cooking was a
way to center herself, an activity she enjoyed and practiced as an Art even
more fastidiously than Akane practiced Anything Goes. THIS was a challenge
and even a dream for her. "Come on, Kasumi."
They had to physically lift Kasumi up and onto the tram.
"Ahem," said the tram as they finally got Kasumi loaded again. "As I was
saying on the left is our landing pad for our special... ah, you're in luck.
Here's some of our special forces."
Nabiki looked at the various armored vehicles, the soldiers, and the combat
mecha and leaned closer to her father. "Dad, if you're still planning on
forcing this marriage if they're not going for it, I've got one thing to
say. Don't."
--------
By the three got to the Audience Room, each of them had gone into shock.
Soun with visions of weapons that could slice and dice him, Nabiki with the
knowledge that obscene wealth didn't quite cover the whole picture, and
Kasumi with (for the first time in her life) kitchen-envy.
Elsewhere, a panicked hummingbird was being chased at high speeds by a
cyborg girl named Atsuko (Nuku Nuku) Natsume. ("Pretty birdie!")
Soun nervously looked around. People in power armor, girls with large guns,
a small group of scantily dressed cheerleaders (?!) arguing in the corner,
and what looked like large combat mecha out of some anime lined up in a row
overlooking this place. Soun was planning what to change and what to keep,
and would anyone mind if he just took Ranma away so that Ranma could take
over the dojo?
"Welcome," said the young boy on the throne in what could easily pass as a
military uniform. "Sorry about the mess but we just had to put down an
invasion. Dreadfully inconvenient you know."
"Uhm, yes, we're..." Soun glanced at the women on either side of the throne.
There was the one big chair, occupied by Ranma. There were also four chairs,
two on either side of Ranma, who had young women occupying them. There was
also a pair of empties at the furthest on either side of the pigtailed
youth.
"Soun Tendo, right? We've been expecting you," said Ranma apparently
completely at ease. "I'd like you to meet Ami Mizuno, Minister of Health."
This was a girl who looked slightly embarrassed on Ranma's immediate right.
"Shampoo, who is liason to the Chinese Amazon contingent here." This was a
purple haired girl wearing a modified Chinese banner dress to the immediate
left of Ranma, one who looked suspiciously over the newcomers as if
assessing their threat. "Ucchan or Ukyo Kuonji, Okonomiyaki Chef Supreme and
my retainer." A girl in blue form-fitting power armor nodded at them, but
she wasn't smiling and somehow looked very deadly. "Megumi Morisato,
representitive of my Mecha Division." A shorthaired girl absorbed in working
her laptop computer absent-mindedly waved. "And lastly we come to Setsuna
Meiou, chief of Security." This was a haughty and aristocratic looking woman
who also looked slightly amused for some reason.
"Uhm, yes, very nice," absent-mindedly mumbled Soun. "Uhm. Your father and I
made an agreement several years ago..."
"...to unite the Tendo and Saotome lines so that Ranma could take over your
dojo and carry on the Anything Goes school," interrupted Setsuna, "so that
you and Genma could retire and play shogi all day and not incidently bypass
certain problems with Japanese inheritance taxes on your property."
"Uhm, yes," Soun allowed. "So my three daughters are: Kasumi, she's 19;
Nabiki, she's 17; and Akane, she's 16. Pick anyone you like, she'll be your
new fiancee."
"There's only two girls here, Tendo-san," pointed out Ukyo.
*Vuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm* *Whoosh!* That being the sound of a panicked
hummingbird racing by with a catgirl android in pursuit.
"Uhm, yes, well." Soun wondered when he'd lost control of this situation.
Ranma sighed and leaned back in his chair. "You *do* realize that the people
here regard having multiple wives as a desirable thing and a sign of
stability in a ruler? And that I already have a few?"
"A few *WIVES*?!" Soun began to go into outraged father mode.
*CLICK-CLICK!* *SHOOM!* *VEEEP!*
Suddenly realizing that weapons were powered up and pointed at him, Soun
banished his Demon Head Attack. "Heh heh."
"I'll give them the chance, if they want it, but I'll find jobs for them
around here so that they can get to know the place," said Ranma with a nod.
"Oh, we'll arrange for you to return home and if they do decide to stay or
go we'll arrange transportation for them."
"...but..." Soun glanced around. It looked like a "take it or leave it" sort
of deal and he was unlikely to be able to get a better one. "...all
right..."
-------
Toltiir sighed happily. "Well, that was *different* at least."
Bast snorted. "So I see. Kasumi goes to work in the kitchens. Nabiki goes to
work in Accounting. Nabiki stays honest because group marriage or not, she
has her best chance of a comfortable beyond her wildest dreams life that
route. Kasumi finds fulfillment in the kitchens and becomes Assistant Head
Chef by the end of the year. Akane and Soun return to Nerima to carry on the
Anything Goes school. Meanwhile Ranma goes on to have one of the most
self-sufficient and technologically capable nations in the region, with a
lunar colony developed before his first kid is born."
"Hotaru is rescued from her Mistress 9 persona," pointed out Toltiir as he
fast-forwarded. "Hotaru then joins the rest of the Senshi and ends up
getting married to Ranma one night when they're celebrating the nation's
first satellite launch. Haruka (who is another one of Ranma's fiancees)
finds that highspeed combat mecha are something she can really get into, and
Michiru (yet another fiancee) becomes an internationally celebrated musician
and artist. Because Haruka and Michiru didn't meet until long after becoming
Ranma's fiancees, they plan on double-teaming him in *that* department."
Fleece shook her head. "Poor Ranma. So much suffering. Don't you think that
lacked restraint though, Toltiir?"
Toltiir sniffed. "Restraint? I'm not into S&M you know. Mischief's my bag."
============
-----------
"What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?" Jean-Jacques
Rousseau
http://metroanime.home.mindspring.com
http://www.geocities.com/mamoru_tengoku
http://www.geocities.com/studio_vanir
metro...@mindspring.com