I've set the posting permission to blocked - meaning you can read the
traffic from the group but not contribute and you must go on qilang to
read it. This is easily reversed. If I were to ban you - something
that has only ever happened to XXX spammers - you would be banned from
both reading and posting and be forever stopped from rejoining.
Like I say; everybody experiences setbacks in struggling with hard
problems. Perhaps what you need to do is to just take a walk and
appreciate the sun and scenery. I could tell you a few stories about
eminent people making mistakes - one involving a mathematician, a
dowser and myself - but another time.
Cheer up and when you change your mind write back and I'll unblock
you.
Mark