Lies my rabbi told
Dr. Philip Bliss
Lies my rabbi told
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I am an Israeli. The name of the Sephardi Chief Rabbi of
my country is Rav Amar.
Judaism
goes to great lengths to show respect for the dead and dying. The High Priest,
on his way to service in the Temple on Yom Kippur, must delay his religious
duties if he is the only person available to bury a body. Respect for the dead
is, simply put, a matter of paramount importance. Jewish tradition mandates that
the terminally ill, their family, and ultimately the body be treated with awe
and reverence.
So it is with the
utmost disappointment, sadness and horror, that I share the following true
story.
The Ben-David family are
active members of the Jewish community in Madrid. Zohar Ben-David is
Israeli born. His wife and his son, Gai, were converted to Judaism. Gai, a
wonderful young man, recently observed his Bar Mitzvah. Sadly, he was also
diagnosed with a brain tumor. The family did everything in their power but
Gai's situation deteriorated. As of last week he was unable to swallow or to
even breath on his own.
Facing the inevitable, his brave father began to look into
how his son would be buried. He was shocked to learn that the Chief Rabbi of
Spain, Rav Dahan, would not authorize Gai's internment in the Jewish cemetery
without the OK of Israel's Chief Sephardi Rabbi, Rav Shlomo Amar.
Gai was a righteous Ger (convert). His conversion included Brit Milah and
Mikveh. He lived as a Jew, because he was a Jew. But, since the Beit Din that
officiated over his conversion was made up of Masorti rabbis, Rav Amar was
unwilling to temper his stern justice with a bit of mercy. This despite the fact
that Jewish law, halacha, forbids the mistreatment of
the convert, including reminding a convert that he or she was once not a Jew.
Rav Amar demanded that if the family
wished their precious child to be buried in the Jewish cemetery he
would have to be taken again to a Mikveh, in the presence of acceptable
witnesses. This child, who had a respiratory tube in his throat, was unable
to swallow and was being supported by a host of hospital machinery,
could not be moved. But this did not move Rav Amar one iota. The
suffering of Gai and of his family was irrelevant to Rav Amar. So easy
was it to say no rather than look, with compassion, for a solution.
When contacted by Israel radio Sunday
night, Rav Amar denied knowledge of this case. When confronted with
evidence to the contrary, he said the Psak (decision)
was not his to make but that of Rav Dahan. Rav Dahan reported to The Jerusalem Post
that it was Rav Amar who made the final call that Gai be buried outside the main
cemetery in an area in the very lower corner separated from the larger site.
How pathetic when chief rabbis abandon the truth and hide
behind falsehoods and denials to cover base behavior. Let the rabbis stand up
and take the heat for the damage they have done to the Ben David family, to the
Masorti community in Madrid, and to Judaism.
Gai passed away on Friday. Rav Dahan and Rav Amar (in Spain for
Hanukkah) did not budge. Gai was buried on the edge of the Jewish cemetery, on
Sunday, in a special section reserved for outsiders. His soul will, I
believe, be treated by God as that of a righteous Jew. The punishment,
if it is to come, will be on those who caused humiliation and suffering to the
Ben David family. Israel's chief rabbi violated the principle of halacha which
states: Better for one to hurl himself into a fiery furnace rather than shame
his fellow in public.
There is an
interesting postscript to this sad tale. Many leaders, and members, of
Madrid's Jewish community have signed a document stating that when their
time comes (may it be a long time off), they would like to be buried in the very
same area where Gai was laid to rest.
May Gai's memory serve as a blessing to all of us. May the light
of his life guide those who are unable to temper justice with mercy. May his
family be comforted with the mourners of Zion and
Jerusalem.
T 61 3 9822 2691
F 61 3 9824 8163
E phili...@blissdentistry.net.au
www.blissdentistry.net.au
20 Anderson Rd, East Hawthorn, Victoria, Australia, 3123
