Few Definitions
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Pradyut Bhattacharya
Dec 21, 2007, 11:27:12 AM12/21/07
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Few Definitions
School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor
all your life so that
you can die Rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you
sleeping pills.
Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses
his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine
willpower is defeated by
feminine waterpower.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from
the notes of the
Lecturer to the notes of the students without
passing through "the minds of
either"
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied
by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a
way that everybody
believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary : A place where success comes before
work.
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens and
everybody disagrees later on.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Criminal: A guy no different from the
rest....except that he got
caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and
late when you are
early.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before
elections and your
Confidence after.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills,
and kills you by bills.
Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not
read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things
straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your
strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to
open their mouth.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know
more than you
actually do.
Committee : Individuals who can do nothing
individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during
life, to be spoken of when
dead
School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor
all your life so that
you can die Rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you
sleeping pills.
Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses
his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine
willpower is defeated by
feminine waterpower.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from
the notes of the
Lecturer to the notes of the students without
passing through "the minds of
either"
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied
by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a
way that everybody
believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary : A place where success comes before
work.
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens and
everybody disagrees later on.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Criminal: A guy no different from the
rest....except that he got
caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and
late when you are
early.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before
elections and your
Confidence after.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills,
and kills you by bills.
Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not
read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things
straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your
strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to
open their mouth.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know
more than you
actually do.
Committee : Individuals who can do nothing
individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during
life, to be spoken of when
dead
--
Pradyut
http://pradyut.tk
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