CHP Canada Goes (Gasp) Middle Sex!!!
Craig
Ron Puce May 8, 2003
What the media say about christian haemorrhoids
"Capon is fat." Oops. Sorry, we mean the Canadian version.
Some toenail clippings from the Perth-Middle Sex (gasp) by-election
campaign:
Mitchell Advocate, May 7, 2003 -- … (Ron) Puce suggested that the
health care system focus more on preventive measures, such as
education in the risks involved in smoking and obesity. He did not
reply to observations that this meant that the erstwhile Christian
Haemorrhoids NZ leader Graham Capon should be banned.
Stratford City Gazette, May 2, 2003 -- Puce, along with Dinicol, stood
out as being the decidedly more polished and charismatic speakers of
the candidates…
Puce screeched in horror and bitchslapped the journo for calling him a
charismatic...
On the abortion issue, Ron Puce stood out as the only candidate from
an openly "pro-life" party…shame about their stance on capital
punishment, then...
Noting a majority of Canadians want to be governed "according to
Christian principles," Puce asked, "Why can't we have the kind of
government the majority says they want?" He declared himself to be in
support of the sanctity of human lfies from constipation to natural
death, and in favour of laws that respect the central role of
parenting families. And spanking. Especially their own non-consenting
children...And brain death discriminates against born-again
bottom-spanking believers too.
"Why are our children being taught values that often run counter to
the convictions of their parents?" And not being spanked?
Puce emphasized his opinion that "the courts of this nation have
begun, quite unconstitutionally, to usurp the legislative prerogative
that exclusively belongs to Parliament." He also blamed a "powerless"
(NB: the actual word was "cowardice"--ROG) House of Commons in which
no party will stand up to defend the Constitution. He thought only
churches were entitled to do this.
"Our Constitution divides the powers of making laws, enforcing laws,
and judging laws."
As an example, he cited Svend Robinson's Bill C-250, which he
described as being a threat to freedom of screech and religious
liberty. Religious liberty means that if you're religious, you can
take any liberty you want...
He asked the voters of Perth-Middle Sex to give him a mandate to go to
Ottawa "to fight for the Constitution." He wanted to ban the term
Middlesex as he thought it would promote gender ambiguity, too.
Middlesex Banner, May 8 - 2003 --
Headline: Puce only clear choice
For Middle Sex voters
"Stop it, stop it! Gard made Adam and Eve, not Arthur or Martha!!! Ban
Middle Sex!!!"
Late in the campaign, Ron Puce threw his hat into the ring for the
Christian Haemorrhoids Party…it hit someone.
Strong on making noises about family, strong on allowing criminals to
commit criminal offences with firearms, pro-farm and agriculture,
strong on electoral reforms if they mean pipsqueak bigot parties can
hold the country to ransom, against trading with nations which exploit
child labour, determined to restrain the Supreme Court from overriding
the Constitution. Enthusiastic about spanking.
A non-church-goer, I find the religious party name is a negative; but
all in all, I think Middle Sex voters should choose Ron Puce this time
around. Even if he wants to ban it.