Flanamation strikes back

[Jay Parks]

((There's a Balrog in the woodpile!))

The Flanamation Strikes Back


Flanamation Scale
6 See it, record it, watch it several times a day. (Macross)

5 Record it, watch it while some dreck is playing on T.V.
(Mospeada)
4 Watch it if you happen to be in the room at the time. (Southern
Cross)
3 Not offensive, not impressive. (Voltron III)

2 Dreck, but with some redeeming factors. (Spiderman and His
Amazing Friends)
1 Dreck. (Go-Bots)

Note the first-- You may have noticed that most of the titles
have changed on the scale. This is to give you an idea of where I
rate the current television programs. Macross didn't change because,
unfortunately, it stands alone in its position. Most of these are
tentative ratings. (I won't review a program unless I see at least
five of its episodes. This may not sound like much, but if you've
seen five He-Mans you've just about seen them all. On the other hand
I have seen all of Macross, Southern Cross, and as many of the
Transformers as I can get up for.)

Note the second-- I stand corrected. Voltron I which stated to
be Voltage Five is in reality Diarugger XV. (At least that makes more
sense than Voltage Five) Undoubtedly Ms Espenshade's informant is
more reliable than mine, and I bow to her superior knowledge. (Thanks
Mary Anne.)

And now back to our program:

Transformers-- When I first saw this show my reaction was enthusiastic
to say the least. "That's Japanese!" I could tell by the use of
dramatic angles, the slightly jerky motion of twelve frames per
second, and the "patented" use of shadow colors on human figures. My
enthusiasm for the art has not died down much, but I had never thought
much of the writing. The story centers around two research teams sent
out from the planet Cybertron to find energy. One team is the
Autobots (Good guys), and the other is the Decepticons (Bad guys).
Apparently all of the self aware machines on Cybertron can transform
from humaniod robot to a useful vehicle or weapon. Well, these two
teams happened to land on earth at the same time. The patriotic
Decepticons are trying to exploit earth in any way possible to get
energy to Cybertron. If they can supply Cybertron with enough energy,
it seems, they will be able to rule it. The Autobots are trying to
stop the Decepticons. Later the show degenerates to the point in
which the Decepticons are just trying to rule the earth, or defeat the
Autobots.
The characters are standard to anyone who has read comics. We
have the stout defender of truth, justice, and a good socket wrench:
Optimus Prime. There is the evil, scheming, He-who-schemes-and-runs-
away villain: Megatron. Don't forget the token human boy: Spike.
There are also plenty of other assorted stereotypes. These are played
by some familiar voices: Peter Cullen, and Michael Bell from the
Voltrons, Scattman Crothers of various prior performances (remember
the mailman in Chico and the Man?), and Casey Kasem from American Top
Forty on radio, American Top Ten on TV. He also played Mark on
Battle of the Planets, and Robin the Boy Wonder on Superfriends. (He
also played Shaggy on Scooby Doo. ed.)
The sound track is unimpressive. mostly a replay of the original
theme you've heard a thousand times on the commercials; and that one
riff they play each time a scene changes. It gets as annoying as the
chant between scenes of "He-Man".
The animation is still nice. It's more consistent than G.I. Joe
or Mask, and seems to be the top of the line for animation that is
storyboarded in America and sent to Japan. They don't do the more
impressive tricks Mighty Orbots or an original Japanese production
would have done, like a close in on a moving ship as it whizzes by
you, or circling the main character. What they do, however, they do
well.
This is not great television, far from it, but if you like to see
some nice animation, this isn't too bad.
As a foot note, I've noticed that they took out the credit that
tells who did the animation. I think that this is a crime. I truly
doubt that the people who watch would like to know more about the
script editors than the animators. I've seen several where it
credited Toei Doga for the animation.
Transformers rates a 4 on the Flanamation Scale.

Mighty Orbots-- You may have noticed by now my tendency to appreciate
the artistic aspects of any particular program over the written
aspect. This has helped me immensely when I want to watch some movie
that is in its original Japanese. Mighty Orbots is the ultimate
expression of this ability. The story concerns a young man named Rob.
He created a fussy childish robot by the name of Ono. He was so
pleased by this creation he went on to create five other maladjusted
android. They all wanted to fight crime. Luckily for them there was
crime for them to fight in the personage of a bio/computerized villain
(with five eyes no less) by the name of Umbra, leader of Shadow.
The bad parts- The stories stink up a tree. In one of the
first, two robotic rock musicians create a magnetic monster (who by
the way look's a lot like Godzilla (the monster, not the musicians)).
The monster starts to suck all the metal on earth into his ever
expanding body, including all the Mighty Orbots. Rob, being a
scientific genius, realizes that extreme cold weakens electromagnetic
energy. He gathers the Orbots and pushes the monster to the rings of
Saturn. Saturn's rings (being made of Ice and therefor colder than
the rest of space) freezes the magnetism to solidity and allows the
Orbots to escape. The five man sized robots (not including Ono) then
merge to form a giant Voltron sized robot. How did they do this? I
have no idea. It's probably P.F.M. (Pure f-ckin' magic). Anyhow,
they grab the now solidified monster by the tail, swing him about, and
hurdle him into a convenient volcano on a nearby small moon. The moon
then explodes, destroying the menace.
See what I mean? Most of the rest of the episodes are equally
well conceived.
The good parts- The plots are dumb but all you need to see is
the art to understand why I've recorded all I could. The time between
when I discovered it and its removal from Saturday morning TV was far
too short. The quality is up to, or beats out, any of the original
Japanese programming. A good portion of the show is animated in
twenty four frames per second, the most fluid movement a conventional
camera can produce. The backgrounds are rich and well detailed. The
characters are usually painted with shadow coloring. And the
direction is superb. Macross did not usually come up to this quality
workmanship. If only Orbots had a story to go with the art! Mighty
Orbots takes the Flanamation Award for best looking art in an American
produced TV series. (would have taken the world award had I not seen
Orguss)
Ahh well. The series was meant to be campy and with a Narrator
like Gary Owens there is little doubt it could be anything but. Most
of the episodes I saw (about ten in all) were a lot of fun even with
the scientific errors.
One last note. You may have noticed, if you watched the credits,
the name of one of the producers. It was Fred Silverman! You
remember, that guy who took ABC to the top, then kept NBC at the
bottom. Just a strange observation.

Mighty Orbots rates a five on the Flanamation Scale, and was produced
by T.M.S.

Note the last-- If any of you have corrections, additions, or
comments I would like to see them. Please send them by way of me at
Jay's E-mail address, or post them yourself. I always like to see
responses. It lets me know I still exist.

Have Fun,

Bill Flanagan

You caught my nose in your left castanet, love.

(decvax!hao!ihnp4!seismo)!noao!parks :uucp
noao!pa...@seismo.ARPA :arpanet?