Reboot the router FWIW.
On the iPhone go to 'Settings > General > Reset > Reset network settings'. This will remove any old networks iOS has remembered & all the proxy configs etc, make sure she doesn't need them :)
Watch the characters as you enter the password, it should be clear that they are correct, iOS shows the last character for a few seconds before hiding it with • (dots).
The 3GS needs to use 802.11.b/g, so make sure that is allowed in the router settings (I wouldn't expect the iPhone to find the network if it wasn't the case, and the iPad may need the same protocol).
It's worth seeing if the router has any firmware updates available (check the vendor's site).
I guess you could change the password to see if that helps, Apple have some recommended setting for routers, however I don't think it is 3GS specific.
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4199
'Settings > About > Diagnostics and usage > Diagnostics and usage data' may have logs that give you something to google for. These logs get moved to the computer after a sync.
It's possible the 3GS doesn't support the encryption mode on the AP, but it's difficult to see a spec of what modes it actually supports.