Thank you, Jesus, for sending Dutch cycling experts to Miami!
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Whether you believe or not, MY "PRAYERS" HAVE BEEN ANSWERED. Or maybe
it was my noise, but whatever the reason, why waste time when the
Dutch figured it out a long time ago? "When the mountain doesn't come
to you," said the prophet, "you go to the mountain." Peace on Earth
and Hallelujah!
The Dutch government is sending three of that cycling- crazy country’s
top bicycle experts to help transform Miami’s car-choked downtown into
bike-friendly territory.
Beware. The Dutch are coming, and they’re armed with a radical idea
about the future of transportation that could cure obesity and global
warming, stall traffic congestion, and maybe shake the very steering
wheel from your hands:
Bicycles.
Scoff if you must, but their arrival signals that Miami is getting
more serious about making room for cyclists.
http://www.miamiherald.com/2011/05/01/2196030/dutch-experts-bringing-bicycle.html
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His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
The political jungle here encourages WASTE and hears absolutely NO
FEEDBACK from people. They are capable of dumping a million bucks on a
bike facility (mixed path by the beach from 65 to 79 ST) NOT CONNECTED
to anything (or connected with a crappy carpet), dumping money on
security, landscaping and some fancy turtle sculptures, then ignore
all SAFETY ISSUES, such as mixing pedestrians, dogs and bicycles, and
overloading the facility with BLINDING LIGHTS that make riding at
night a harrowing experience. But somehow the Dutch experts will
design proper paths to come out of the jungle.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Thank you for your collaboration. Riding a bike in Miami is perhaps no
safer than in Afghanistan, and I've been subject to savage attacks.
Your experts have a tough job, but it's a battle worth fighting. I
propose actually a Dutch Package --Dutch liberal democracy-- for
America... Wishful thinking? No more than taming Miami traffic. Please
see website link below...
(WE HAVE AN OVERWHELMING PRESENCE IN THE INTERNET, SO THE WORLD IS
BEHIND US --OR SO WE HOPE)
http://webspawner.com/users/BANANAREVOLUTION
"WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE"
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
On May 2, 10:14 pm, Alan Baker <alangba...@telus.net> wrote:
> In article
> <fd940771-cfde-4d99-bd5b-7b5c91fb3...@s2g2000yql.googlegroups.com>,
> "His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
> > The problem with speeders is:
>
> > a) they take shorter to stop,
>
> Just plain wrong.
Obviously I used the wrong word. They take LONGER to stop. Dodge that.
>
>
>
> > b) they crash harder,
>
> But the goal is not crashing at all...
PREVENTION you mean. Right, lower speeds, lane discipline AND no
multitasking are the first lines of prevention.
>
>
>
> > c) the intimidate other users, ie. cyclists, small EVs (golf carts)
> > and scooters.
>
> Any car does that.
The faster and more chaotic the worse. Zigzagging AND speeding are
deadly combination that often see around.
Scary and driving you into ever bigger vehicles.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
- Hide quoted text -
- Show quoted text -
> His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher wrote:
> >http://www.dst-corp.com/james/PaintingsOfJesus/Jesus10.jpg
> > Whether you believe or not, MY "PRAYERS" HAVE BEEN ANSWERED. Or maybe
> > it was my noise, but whatever the reason, why waste time when the
> > Dutch figured it out a long time ago? "When the mountain doesn't come
> > to you," said the prophet, "you go to the mountain." Peace on Earth
> > and Hallelujah!
> No the Dutch don`t have mountains (if you don`t count cheese and
> milk/butter)
> "If God didn`t provide enough land, we make it ourselves."
> That is our mentality, we don`t wait for God to do it, we just pull our
> hands
> out of our sleeves, and start working.
Good, good. That's how the bridges and the dams get done. God doesn't
provide any of that.
You must also buy your own bike, but you "pray" you don't get hit by
car. What can you do about it other than TAME TRAFFIC?
> > The Dutch government is sending three of that cycling- crazy country’s
> > top bicycle experts to help transform Miami’s car-choked downtown into
> > bike-friendly territory.
> Well they could do that here again, the last years they totally ignored us
> bicyclists.
You Dutch and they ignore you? How could that be?
> > Beware. The Dutch are coming, and they’re armed with a radical idea
> > about the future of transportation that could cure obesity and global
> > warming, stall traffic congestion, and maybe shake the very steering
> > wheel from your hands:
> Besides, it is cheap, handy and fun. well most of the time if it isn`t
> raining ;o)
> And cure obesity? Hell no, I am still overweight and go on my bicycle
> overwhere,
> I don`t even have a car.
Even if you are overweight you are not dumb. You don't pollute either
and that makes you feel good --because of the endorphins, I hear.
> > Bicycles.
> > Scoff if you must, but their arrival signals that Miami is getting
> > more serious about making room for cyclists.
> Which is a good thing, well, not for your longs, they suck in a lot of
> small dust from cars exhausts. So don`t ride a bike in congested traffic
> please.
Never thought it could be that bad.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> I don`t even have a car.
I'm free from it too but my girlfriend must drive. Actually she got a
surprise this morning: $42 parking ticket in this "god forsaken place"
and another thing to worry about.
Notice we don't have the option to ride a bike so this place must have
been designed by Satan himself.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
say about Holland being flooded by sea rise applies to Miami Beach:
"For the overwhelming majority of us --mundane monkeys-- it remains a
dangerous game of survival to ride a bike. Ironically it is us who are
willing to do something to avoid sea rise, which will make beautiful
places like Holland disappear under water.
We do need lots of help!"
http://acwestmount.wordpress.com/2010/12/20/bicycle-council-of-holland-fietsberaard/#comment-59
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Canadians have done a lot in Montreal, at least.
This is the main Dutch organization:
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
spot the problems as well):
1- In Amsterdam and Copenhagen... "speed limits within these cities
are on the order of 30 km/hr or 19 mph."
2- "The vast majority of bicyclists in the US have no real
possibilities of cycling in environments like those of Portland or
Davis."
3- "Most state and local DOT officials have little interest in making
communities safe for bicyclists."
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0870714198/ref=ox_sc_act_title_1?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER
We tried the bridge from Aventura to Collins and found out that
neither pedestrians nor cyclists have minimal protection from highway
speeds. Ramps at sidewalks are missing, and you wonder if there's
another kinder gentler bridge over the canal. In fact, when you get to
the top of the bridge and you see the water below... you feel like
ending the suffering. Just kidding, just 30 minutes later we were
swimming at the beach. Remember, LIFE CAN BE A BEACH!
Edward Dolan
news:cf204bf9-c7ff-45c4...@e35g2000yqc.googlegroups.com...
[...]
> We tried the bridge from Aventura to Collins and found out that
> neither pedestrians nor cyclists have minimal protection from highway
> speeds. Ramps at sidewalks are missing, and you wonder if there's
> another kinder gentler bridge over the canal. In fact, when you get to
> the top of the bridge and you see the water below... you feel like
> ending the suffering. Just kidding, just 30 minutes later we were
> swimming at the beach. Remember, LIFE CAN BE A BEACH!
Why the hell are you trying to cycle in Miami Beach? That area is for
walking. If you want to cycle, find an area appropriate for it ... like god
damn fucking Minnesota for instance! We have got a frost warning for this
morning and I am freezing my ass off.
Life is NEVER a beach you confounded moron! Life is in earnest and we are
all going to Hell! When we are all there, I will delight in kicking your
dumb ass for all eternity ... and Tom Sherman's dumb ass too!
--
Ed Dolan the Great - Minnesota
aka
Saint Edward the Great - Order of the Perpetual Sorrows - Minnesota
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> "His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"<nolionnoprob...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>
> news:cf204bf9-c7ff-45c4...@e35g2000yqc.googlegroups.com...
> [...]
>
> > We tried the bridge from Aventura to Collins and found out that
> > neither pedestrians nor cyclists have minimal protection from highway
> > speeds. Ramps at sidewalks are missing, and you wonder if there's
> > another kinder gentler bridge over the canal. In fact, when you get to
> > the top of the bridge and you see the water below... you feel like
> > ending the suffering. Just kidding, just 30 minutes later we were
> > swimming at the beach. Remember, LIFE CAN BE A BEACH!
>
> Why the hell are you trying to cycle in Miami Beach? That area is for
> walking. If you want to cycle, find an area appropriate for it ... like god
> damn fucking Minnesota for instance! We have got a frost warning for this
> morning and I am freezing my ass off.
You are wrong about that. You better kick ass here or they will kick
yours!
There's some walking in certain spots but it doesn't get you as far or
as COOL as a bike. The cooling factor of a bike makes it far more
pleasant.
>
> Life is NEVER a beach you confounded moron! Life is in earnest and we are
> all going to Hell! When we are all there, I will delight in kicking your
> dumb ass for all eternity ... and Tom Sherman's dumb ass too!
No way, we can't possibly go to the same Hell as SUV owners! Imagine
we could face our torturers... ;)
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Sure, why not?
Here we go:
Just as you pass the Rowing Club, negotiating a very narrow sidewalk
(lucky if you don't find pedestrians that may curse you), crowded by
signposts and being careful not to hit the bump (stupid design) at the
light to cross 65 ST, you find a sign that says "no bicycles," which
you assume applies to the park, but you ignore anyway. Then you find
the first real test of endurance, not because it's long but because IT
TESTS YOUR PATIENCE! (BE READY TO SPEND 5 MINUTES THERE!) As you must
cross Alton Rd, you have to wait for one green light to get to the
middle island THEN wait for the other light to get to the other side
where you must go over the little bridge and down to the second real
test --the SURVIVAL TEST-- where cars are turning left into you, and
you have no visibility whatsoever over them. PRAY AT THIS POINT! Then
it gets kind of easy, the GARBAGE TANK obstacle right on the middle of
the sidewalk --that you kick around and comes back-- the broken
sidewalk to test your shocks, the people walking dogs looking at you
funny --they don't see people that often-- and the barking dogs that
are usually small. BEWARE OF CARS COMING OUT OF DRIVEWAYS! Then you
get to the Miami Heart Institute where you can have your pulse taken
and... everything goes downhill from there, I mean ABSOLUTE BEGINNERS
all the way to South Beach!
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> "His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
>
> >> Why the hell are you trying to cycle in Miami Beach? That area is for
> >> walking. If you want to cycle, find an area appropriate for it ... like god
> >> damn fucking Minnesota for instance! We have got a frost warning for this
> >> morning and I am freezing my ass off.
>
> > You are wrong about that. You better kick ass here or they will kick
> > yours!
>
> > There's some walking in certain spots but it doesn't get you as far or
> > as COOL as a bike. The cooling factor of a bike makes it far more
> > pleasant.
>
> bicyclists, and given the spread-out nature of Miami, surely there's a
> place for bicycles. Every picture I see of the place make it look too
> hot and barren for pleasant walking, though, so breezing through on a
> bike sounds a lot better...
>
> The story comments on the "excessively wide" miami streets; maybe if
> the designers are in a good mood, they could even widen the sidewalks
> at the same time they put in bike lanes. Make it a more human place.
> If they plant some trees in the sidewalks, wow!
I think the magic word to make things happen is POLITICAL WILL. It is
said where there's a will, there's a way. Bicycling is the perfect
vehicle for the summer heat as well our spread out design. Sidewalks
could be widened in some places but still leave us in conflict at
intersections. We either need basic bike lanes along major streets or
just give us the opportunity to TAKE THE LANE and have the cars go
around on the other lanes. That's fairly easy to do if you do if you
go fast enough on a road bike --they are a different kind of animal--
otherwise we need to slow down traffic on the right lane, which is
where the conflict exists.
We can not keep these dumb, grinding conditions forever, right?
You must have seen this video, right? Hopefully the dead cyclist
caught on camera will be the catalyst for change:
The need for cameras --red light cameras, speed cameras, live
cameras-- is clearly evident.