What about a sting, might be self funding...
Posh looking bike, keyring cameras mounted on/in frame (less than a $10 each) cheap phone hidden under seat with GPS and motion sensor to activate the camera and track the bike and video the thief. Motion sensor - text out alert to reclaim crew then use G latitude to track the thief and recover bike and cameras with video.
Have a camera on the space to record the stealing then take a camera crew to film the reclaiming of the bike – all done with out the police DIY then sell the story to TV or viral video on youtube, make the money back from the build – I would be up for doing the video side of it.
Hamish x
(As for d-locks - why not have a pressurised foul smelling gluey goo in the middle - bad enough to make you gag, and sticky enough to be an absolute bugger to get off tools / the frame?)