Transhumans Dream Of Waking Up In Hedonistia

0 views

Skip to first unread message

Heaven soon

unread,

Jul 26, 2010, 8:37:01 PM7/26/10

to Heavensoon

Transhumans Dream Of Waking Up In Hedonistia
6:00: I wake up euphoric after a wonderful night of programmed dreams. After climbing out of my deprivation pod, I challenge my synthetic heart with 350 pushups — the recommended workout for a 114-year old. Next I gaze out the window of my 153rd floor home at the other Farmpartments, all energy self-sufficient and covered with dwarf fruit that the robo-monkeys pick for us in the night. What should I do first? Get my e-democracy voting over with, or loosen up with my Sexbot? I chose the latter. As I grunt happily with my Margaret Sanger model, I hear my wife in the next room doing the same thing with her love-droid. Ha, ha. These were great 80th Anniversary presents for each other. 6:30: Now I’m voting. What a chore. With representative democracy, instead of the every-two-year ballot box, I now vote on numerous issues every single day. My phone shows me myriad ways that the budget can be balanced. I check “b” and move on to the propositions. 7:00: My son Lexus e-calls to find out how I voted. We generally disagree on everything. I tell him I voted “no” on the proposal for government-supervised eugenics because I support the rights of parents to choose. “But those moron Luddite kids are failing in school!” he screeches. “They’re so retarded that they can’t do calculus in kindergarten! Plus, they’re crippled with near-sightedness and acne!” I interrupt. “You’re arguing about a tiny demographic,” I counter. “Hardly anybody has kids anymore; only one in thirteen women” (fertility rates plummeted when immortality arrived in 2041.)