The Rebel Alliance

Robert Penner

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Sep 8, 2009, 9:01:47 PM9/8/09

to Grumpy Old Flashers

Back when Twitter was called FlashCoders, there was a ragtag bunch of
rebels who refused to bow to the Empire.

The Rebel Alliance had mastered the ancient art of wielding the
__proto__, an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.
Its sharp underscores could slice through any object.
So cleanly, in fact, that members could be attached to new objects and
stay alive.

The Empire loved to twist the Prototype in unnatural ways.
But the Alliance refused to turn to the Dark Side.

"A Jedi's strength flows from the Prototype," said Obiyang.
He was the wise mentor of the Alliance, preserving the Old Ways in his
quantum archives.
Obiyang was the first to achieve MovieClip fusion by plunging his
__proto__ deep into the Prototype.

Count Moockoo was a double agent.
He maintained a cozy relationship with the Empire whilst feeding
information to the Rebels.

Skypenner developed an unhealthy obsession with parenting issues.
He challenged Jabba Grossman to a duel in the Beta quadrant,
brandishing an ECMA-262 spec-tronator.
But Grossman laughed at Skypenner and returned to eating frogs.